I don't like how the dynamics shift, but I do like getting railed every once in a while. Is there a way to combine those two things?

Hello, my hubby and I have been working our way towards fending for a while and recently (last 3ish months) started moving more in this direction. We believe this could be where we both want to be, we both like the way the roles fit us, and have found a good balance most of the time. That being said, I’m currently heavily prego and I have almost no sex drive, or desire for relief in that way. This has led to days where my poor sub hubby is having issues with his sex drive and his depression, we still do our weekly maintenance things, and he still does all of his chores but I feel bad from my pre femdom wife brain because although I am more than in my right to put him in his cage and remind him that we don’t behave that way, it feels wrong to disciple his body when his brain is also struggling.

Do you guys have any ideas for how I could help hubby still feel like a good sub without me feeling bad for ‘neglecting’ him? Thanks in advance!

I don’t know if this is exactly the right place to post this. But I need some help.

So, today, my ex-domme, who ended things with me a while back, and I called on the phone, chatted, and hung out. She hadn’t talked to me for a very long time before today. She wanted to reassure me that she still wants to be friends and that she cares about me.

So, later today I texted her and we talked for a bit. And she revealed that she’s in a d/s relationship with a man online who she’s known since she was young. I don’t know the specifics of his age in comparison to hers, or really the specifics of the whole dynamic, but I suspect he’s much older given the fact that she said he was like a father figure. She also told me that she doesn’t tell anyone about their relationship because “it’s very taboo” and that she ended things with me because “he’s been very possessive lately” and doesn’t want her doing stuff with anyone else except for her best friend.

Keep in mind my ex-domme is 19 years old, I’m 21, and I get the feeling that this man is much older than she is.

I feel like he probably groomed her and is taking advantage of her and I’m very scared for what might happen next. My ex-domme has had issues with drugs in the past and has been in very dangerous situations with older men before but it never seems to have gotten to this point.

I texted her this:

“I’m gonna be honest though, you should keep someone you know irl in the know. I get he’s known you for years and that you probably feel safe with him. But, an older man knowing a younger girl for a long time and then entering a d/s relationship with her once she’s an adult, especially if there’s a father/daughter dynamic there has a lot of room for a lot of things. I’m not gonna tell you to end it but I do want you to be safe.

And I wanna ask you this: would you be comfortable interacting with a sub in the way he’s interacting with you? Like if the roles were reversed, would you be ok with it?”

I tried to express things in a way that wouldn’t scare her off. She hasn’t replied yet. I have a feeling this is really really bad and I don’t quite know what to do.

She’s also said that she’s “known him for years”. Which to me says he knew her while she was a minor over the internet.

Does anyone have any advice?

I am very new to the online BDSM space. I’ve recently went search for online submissive boys to play with. I made it clear what I’m looking for, what I like and dislike along with limits.

I’ve come to the conclusion that a lot of these men don’t actually want to submit to a fem domme. They instead are fetishizing us for a quick wank. They will tell you “I’ll do anything for my Goddess. You own me.” etc etc then they just … won’t? Maybe in that moment they’ll act subby, but then they’ll get all bratty with you and one sub I met in the BDSM personals after a few days of talking he did a complete 180 on me. He went from being my submissive to being a total asshole talking so disrespectful to me. With him in particular I should’ve known he was no good cause when we were talking getting to know each other he said he’s normal a dom but he wants to desperately find a dominant woman to submit and be owned by. He said he has had no luck finding a dominant woman so he’s “settled for submissive women who are begging to be owned by me”. His words. Which is very icky and unfair to those submissive and it’s unfair and mean to say you’re settling for a submissive woman.

I just can’t help but feel these men are completely full of crap. They don’t actually like women. They only want to get their way so they can wank then move on.

so i know this title is almost an oxymoron by itself, but despite enjoying domming others, it makes me feel shameful for some reason. im a switch and only date switches but..

for background i am middle eastern and dating someone similar, so my perception of what a “male partner” is not subby at all.. maybe in bed but not in day life, i don’t know, it’s something that makes me question what i’m into or whether i have a Madonna complex that makes it hard to see my sub as “real men” or respectful enough, yes i know that’s terrible but i’m wondering if other dommes went through a phase like that:/

i just want some perspectives.

edit: reading comments, i feel like i should also add that it’s not being submissive male only, it’s also being generally not masculine, not interested in having traditional masculine traits and behaviors etc and even though i’m extremely into feminine partners (i’m pansexual) that’s when it comes to sex only… in reality, i still struggle to feel comfortable with a romantic relationship where i’m basically being in control 24/7 especially around other people…

yes that might be because of where i live/ culture and how other traditional couples are expected to be, and i’m aware this should’ve been clarified since the beginning…

Hello everyone,

I’m a dominant leaning switch who’s been exploring my role in power exchange dynamics offline for some time, but I’m new to Reddit (lurking for a while though) and looking to connect with like-minded people. I’d love to hear from other Dominant Women (or experienced submissives) about their experiences, advice, and favorite spaces on here.

Like many here, I thrive on control, discipline, and structure, and I enjoy both the psychological and practical aspects of dominance. While I have some experience in the lifestyle, I’m always eager to learn, refine my style, and deepen my understanding.

For those of you who have been on Reddit for a while, where do you recommend I start? Are there any specific subreddits, resources, or discussions you’ve found particularly insightful? I’d also love to hear about any personal experiences or lessons you’ve learned along the way.

Looking forward to engaging with this community and learning from those who have walked this path before me!

I have a sub who really wants to do TPE. But one I dont really want that type of responsibility but I think it comes from my lack of comfortability with it. I’ve researched, watched videos and seen examples of course but at the same time. I cant help but feel its too much responsibility to have. Maybe I think our relationship needs some strengthening and it might help. But any advice on TPE would be very helpful I just might need another perspective on it

Don’t wanna get into too much detail, but let’s just say i’m a young woman, a domme, who’s always been into older men. By “older”, i mean ≈30-50.

Now what i’ve noticed is that a lot of older subs feel the need to “teach” me about femdom relationships.

To a point where it’s not much fun anymore and i don’t feel like putting in the effort and creativity to give the dynamic my own personal “twist”.

Was wondering if any younger dommes out there have had similar experiences :)

Having PIV intercourse with my sub is sometimes difficult because when he’s heavily in a submissive space during a scene it’s hard for him to transfer over into more “man on top” energy. He does respond really well though to dominant intros. Could you help me with ideas for a low effort/ light scene intros that still have a dominant feel to them? Here’s what I have in mind:

Latex/ leather/ mesh fits Boot worship Foot stool Body worship especially if I’m in a fit Facesitting with stroking his member Leash and collar (haven’t tried this yet though)

I'm curious if you have some crual ideas for chastity games. I do have one including cuckolding, humiliation and chastity.

So the Keyholder give the key of her sub to one of her bulls. The game is that the sub must ask(or beg...) one of her bull if they have his chastity key. If they don't, the bull is allow to fuck the wife keyholder. The sub must ask to a second bull until he finally guess it right. If the sub guess it right, he's allow a reward. (Free of chastity for an hour, edging or wtv.)

I also have think about another similar game that the hotwife make the sub taste cum. The sub have to guess wich bull's semens it is. If he got it wrong > punishment. If he got it right > reward.

Do you have any game suggestion as these?

So me 19M and 18F are 1 year into the relationship everything going fine, sex life has been ok i guess lately she has been saying she wants more like time wise and dick wise. She had made some remarks about my dick which i agreee isnt the biggest. So she suggested that we use sex toys. She picked out a vibrator and big black and unsuprisingly huge dildo (she said that is 4 times bigger than mine) so ok im good with that but now she kinda wants me to watch her play and use the toys. Some sort of a cuck ? I dont know i do see myself doing that. Being a watcher. So now we bought a chair for the bedroom and that were i watch and she is on the bed. Is this weird? I dont know how to fell about it. I starting to like it. Hope it doesnt lead to full on cuckold...i dont want to share her with other guys. How much do you find this weird?

Hey,

I'm (35F) pretty vanilla but I really enjoy doing facesitting on my husband (28M). So I have no further knowledge about the topic and I'm looking for ideas.

Tonight I want to surprise my husband by playing well his biggest kink: facesitting.

We are into ass worship too. He loves when I ignore him for my phone, bit humiliate him (he always ask me to put him in his place or show him who is the boss). We also love a bit of dirty talking with some light cuckold tone.

For now I did facesitting while I was browsing reddit/insta, then stroked his cock like after 10 mins.

Could you please give me some ideas how to make it an unforgettable night for him? Please be specific because I'm a total noob in this topic. Thx <3

Me and my boyfriend have been engaging in femdom for a while now. I enjoy it, he does too, but he’s kinda getting bored with the same thing over and over again. I use small things here and there that are new but not enough. Does anyone have anything that they tried that was new or something they did and their sub really liked it. Looking for any and all advice/ideas.

            ❤️‍🔥 Queen’s Court❤️‍🔥

✨✨✨New Dommes Welcome✨✨✨

We are a small well curated, active community. Low protocol, casual and supportive.

✨WE REQUIRE AGE VERIFY✨

💫 Dommes only space for chat and support. All experience levels welcome

💫Sub chat, for all things subbi support

💫Wholesome community chat, NSFW spaces

🚫NO FINDOMMES OR CONTENT CREATORS ALLOWED🚫

💖Great server for new Dommes, low drama and not buried in thirsty boys💖

Link https://discord.gg/fbEY4PAem2

https://www.reddit.com/r/LetGirlsHaveFun/comments/1idx3n7/omg_fr/

I saw this browsing r/all and thought of y'all

So I’ve tried (without success) to get into a Femdom dynamic for a long while now. I’ve met a few fake dommes (and by that I mean scammers pretending to be dommes) and occasionally I’ve been accused of “topping from the bottom” usually when it comes to being firm (but still respectful) about my limits and the like, particularly where my money is concerned. But every time I’ve tried to assert such a hard line, I’ve been told that I’m “not a good sub” or I’m “not ready to submit” which is followed up with “you need to trust me”

Maybe it’s just me getting into my own head about this, but am I really topping from the bottom if I’m being cautious about both my personal and financial safety? What do you all think?

Hi, This is an invitation for the older members of this community to come check out r/FemdomOver30.  It is a community space for redditors (Domme, sub, or anywhere in between) ages 30+ to discuss all things femdom. It mirrors this community in many ways, but the discussions are held with a more mature peer group. The community is open to all experience levels.

My gf and I (M) are slowly getting more and more into a femdom dynamic. This dynamic is complex and new for us both, but with the right communication I believe it's a very strong and healthy one which we both enjoy a lot! Anyway, what do you share about your dynamic with friends? My gf wants to talk about it with her friends, which I get, but where do you set the boundaries? I see them regularly aswell.

I should clarify with context. I have seen a few ProDommes lately after a fun initial experience. All of these sessions ranged from good to fantastic. I felt like I really connected with a couple. One of them doesn't really count for this scenario (i know her personally), but the other Domme followed up over email, explained how much she enjoyed the sessions, and inquired about future sessions if possible.

My question is for those Prodommes out there, how often do you reach out to clients after a few sessions if you enjoyed it? Do you establish a sort of professional rapport with your clients? Is the communication two way or mainly one way from the client?

Still new to the back and forth so I figured I'd reach out to validate. Thanks in advance!!

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I'm (20f) completely new to the bdsm scene, i've been lurking but haven't actively engaged in anything. I started talking to to a potential sub who is aware of my lack of experience. We can only communicate online, not in person. I have some ideas for stuff to do in person, but i feel like online is such a different thing. I don't know how we'd do a scene online, so i feel like when you're texting it's almost immediately a 24/7 thing? Neither one of us are into heavy impact play or massive punishments. We like acts of service and just showing submissiveness in generel (not necessarily in a sexual way), but I don't know how to do that online. So far I haven't found any information on how to dom online, so any help would be appreciated. Overall i feel pretty uncreative and pretty out of my depth.

Me (25M) and my girlfriend (27W) have always been into femdom and recently found out we both share a kink we were to ashamed to discuss. We both get turned on thinking about women humilliating and punishing men for all the wrongs things they’ve done to women over the years (historic vengeance, we like to call it). We are very open minded and we both enjoy exploring new limits; we are into CBT, SPH, chastity, castration, body worshipping, farting and toilet slavery but any new ideas and fetishes are welcome but we are definitely more invested in physical punishments

My girlfriends describes herself as a vengeful woman. In our sessions she likes to tell me about a specific event or crime men have committed to women and decides a punishment for me (she represents all the women and I represent all the men/patriarchy). We’d like to ask to all of you out there, what’s something men are responsible for that you’d like to see them suffer for? Any form of degradation is appreciated and respected as we also enjoy doing fantasy scenarios and I personally like to see her fulfill her wishes of being in full control over me

Very recently, I have been coming across subs who want to dictate what they are willing to give to be in my presence. Which I find to be annoying and tacky because if you put yourself up for service and you approach me I thought you were to fulfill my orders and wishes.

I understand we a in a world where we as Dommes are expected to direct and guide the sub in their quest for gratification, but how do they call themselves subs if they are not willing be submissive?

Any thoughts?

She’s pretty vanilla, but open minded about these things. However, it doesn’t come naturally to her, and we’re slowly working in the occasional domination experience. She has started to be imperious during sessions, which is good, but they’re also few and far between. I want to try to make this a positive experience for her And encourage more of this in the future. Does anybody have any suggestions on what I can do to make it a positive experience? I have tried asking her these sorts of questions, but she never has an answer for me. When I ask her if she enjoyed a certain something she did she’ll typically tell me it was fine.

I am a submissive male (26) and am feeling a bit discouraged in my search for an online Domme (I specify online because that is how I would like the dynamic to start before moving to in-person).

I have tried using a number of online platforms. The one that I’ve used the most and have the most experience with is Fetlife. And frankly, it has been supremely disappointing. From what I’ve seen, the Femdom groups are inundated with obviously fake profiles and scammers. In the 8 years that I have been using Fetlife, I have found maybe 4 Dommes that are legitimate and don’t demand tribute before there’s an actual dynamic in place.

I am ultimately looking for a relationship. I have no interest in any dynamic that is based on money. I understand that pro-Dommes exist. I understand that findom exists. These are legitimate but ultimately not what I’m looking for.

Are there any other platforms out there worth trying? Or, should I just abandon online all together and try to go the in-person rout (e.g. attending munches and events)? I have no experience with the in-person rout so any suggestions would be most helpful.

I've made numerous posts in the past on personal subreddits and I was wondering what people tend to respond to more.

The really short ones that I see I tend to assume they're just in it for a quick thing and haven't given much time and consideration to what they want. But then sometimes an ad can be over the top and far too long that it actually becomes difficult to read and take on board what is being said.

I do lean more towards the longer ones, I think you're more likely to find what you want if you lay it out clearly, but I'm curious to know what other people respond to or what their thoughts are.

I’m in the UAE and can’t recieve a verification code to signup in FETLIFE is there any one can help me

This might not be the best place for this question but l'm not really sure where else to ask it. My mom has been dating someone recently that's very into breath play and has been choking her unconscious repeatedly. I'm wondering about the safety and normalcy of this and if I should try to intervene or if I should stay out of it. Any advice is appreciated.

So im a m21, who's been ik a dynamic with my domme for almost 3 months now. I've grown quite comfortable with her and i kinda really like her. But that aside, we have a few sessions but somewhat reduced since i hurt my shoulder. I feel kinda useless atm and she benching me from doing any sessions is reasonable cause she wants me 2 heal. Even when we were on call she ended a session cause i clenched my shoulder when it hurt while i was touching myself. So I'm looking for ideas for us 2 explore that may not use my shoulder or something we could explore after I'm healed?

Couple nights ago was the first night I heard her say she’s a switch. I was genuinely so happy cause I’ve been the one calling her a switch until now.

I woke up the other day and asked her to peg me when I get home as a joke. She said she would and that kinda led into me being pretty submissive on text. Once I got home she was in lingerie and her make up and hair was done. She started ordering me around. Telling me to do things like get her wine and massage her and put lotion in her. I was on my knees for all of it. She had me kissing her feet and her entire body.

She made me pour her wine on my knees, she made me do the dishes and clean. She called me her little bitch the entire time teasing me and telling me only little bitches get happy to cook and clean like I do. She grabbed my dick in an aggressive way and told me she had better and I need to do everything she wants tonight.

She had me in such a sub space I genuinely was walking around our place like her little puppy. Doing anything and everything she said.

She at one point. Has me strip her down, run the shower for her. Grab her more wine and bathe her entire body while she was sipping her wine. Something nice to note for my female readers is that I work out and have always been complimented on my hands haha

So I work in sales so I’m always in a suit and tie. That day I decided to wear an all black suit, black button up shirt, no tie, black watch, and some silver rings. I was still in my suit as I was stripping her, as she got in the shower I rolled up my sleeves. She finds that little detail very hot haha

It was a decently long shower, I really took my time clearing her body. It was sexual at times, it was very submissive for me. It was mostly beautiful though. I loved my hands gripping her waist. The soap making it easy to slip around her skin. My hands washing every inch over her body as she relaxes. Not caring water was getting all over my sleeves. I put my head in her stomach for a sec. Not because I wanted anything sexual, it I just wanted my face as close as I can be to her. It was nice. I loved pleasing her like that. Once she got out we put her lingerie and heels on her.

She made me put lotion on her entire body. Once we went to the bedroom. She had me crawl on the floor and beg to get into bed.

I really mean it when I say this was the hottest thing I ever experienced in my life. I am very much a switch in the bedroom, but as a male mostly only get to play as a dom. Don’t get me wrong, degrading and locking a girl up to use is very hot, but giving up all of you to someone else’s mercy is just a completely different head space. You can easily get lost in it.

So I was on my knees at her feet. She has such nice feet. Her toes nails are like this pearl color rn. Her heel also made her almost 4 inches taller. Basically my height, she thought that was funny. So back to it, I was on my knees begging to her to let me in bed. She had her feet in my face. Telling me to beg like the bitch I was, I kid you not. I genuinely begged. It wasn’t role playing at that point.

So she let me in bed, she tied me up and jerked me off. It was hard to get hard cause I’ve never been a sub like those before. That’s when she started really humiliating me. Telling me how small my dick was and that her exes fucked better. Like every single one fucked better. She laughed at me, called me a bitch. She really degraded me. Telling em that my dick was pathetic. Making this little pouty face and noise asking me if I really that I was better than the guys she’s been with. When I would say yes, she would laugh and say awwww. I came to her telling me to not let my shrimp dick cum.

She said she would fuck am with her strap if I came. That’s when I came…

Kinda tired, might elaborate on the story tomorrow. Anyway, thanks for following along. Hope this update was fun!