so this guy I like lives 3 hours far but we met in the middle that’s how I know him. the first date was set because I told him I was going with my family to that city close to him and he came to see me and have our date.

he hasn’t mentioned anything about coming or wanting to meet again at a specific date and time. but tbh I want to see him and I was thinking of going to that city again (if he’s not free I’d go with a friend instead) but now with all those tiktok and reels advice I feel like I’m doing too much or that he should be planning something too.

We’ve been constantly texting and I know he’s been busy the past weekends and we work too so I understand specially because of the distance.

What do you think?

Hello everyone, I need some advice. At a pizza place that sells slices, there’s a girl who seems really nice and friendly, with a cute style that’s a bit like mine. I’d like to go talk to her and strike up a conversation to see if there’s a connection, but I’m not sure what to say.

The thing is, the place is pretty small, and there are no seats near the counter where I could sit close to her. So, I’d need to approach her, buy a slice of pizza, and somehow start a conversation.

Recently, I was in a car accident, and I’m still looking pretty rough. One idea I had was to go into the shop, order a slice, and have a friend walk in and ask me how I survived the crash. I’d act a bit mysterious and try to get her involved. But this feels a little overcomplicated and forced—it’s not guaranteed she’d be interested in the story, or worse, another employee might get involved instead.

Since she’s new, I could just walk up to her and ask, “You’re new here, right? Haven’t seen you here before.” But I wouldn’t know how to continue from there, and I’d really like to find a way to invite her out for coffee or ask for her number.

The layout of the place is also a bit of an issue. I’m not sure how to keep her talking without making her uncomfortable in front of her coworkers. Honestly, I’m not very good at this, so any suggestions would be incredibly helpful.

If I stood at the counter to eat, I could stay nearby while she’s working, but I’d need a reason to hang around—maybe a friend could join me there to keep the conversation flowing.

Thanks so much to anyone who’s read this far and is willing to leave even a small suggestion! It means a lot.

Hi, I (23F) and someone(23M) have been in 'something' for 8 months so far.

We.....

・have deep connection

・used to go for dates twice a week (now we are in long distance)

・text everyday, call (by mutual effort)

・talk about the future

・share hobbies and interests

・know each other's parents and coworkers well

・discussed our plans and how/where things would go

・know that we have been exclusive.

He treats me as if I'm his gf and so do I as if he's my bf. But we didn't agree to officially be in a relationship because I had to move out for work and both of us didn't want to do LDR. We thought it would be too painful. Now, it has been 3 months since I left his town and we are still talking all day, everyday, telling each other 'I miss you', that technically put us in a situational LDR after all. We hope to see each other again soon but the plan is still vague due to our work life.

What do you think about this type of situation? He clearly said that we were not in situationship and he really wanted to make me his gf. Everything is same as relationship except COMMITMENT. What's your thoughts?

Basically I (20m) and a close friend of mine (22f) will be going on a vacation in 5 days just the two of us. We will be sharing a bed. 3 months ago i asked her if she is open to the idea of us dating she said no, that's alright i moved on and only see her as a friend but after our conversation yesterday. Where we talked about what we like in bed and her asking me my preferences also saying she wished she had someone because it felt way better. During the conversation i didn't catch on so i didn't ask but now im questioning whether that was a hint. I usually don't have issues with catching hints but after she rejected the idea of us dating i completely removed the idea of anything happening between us except platonic friendship.

My question is am i overthinking this? Was it a hint? (I will still talk to her about it for obvious reasons just need some opinions on the topic)

I recently met an incredible guy who checks all of my boxes. When we first started talking and going on dates, he was on my mind all the time and I was constantly infatuated. It's only been about a month, and we've decided to be exclusive, but I'm already starting to feel a bit of uncertainty creep in.

I'm 30 and this is the first person I've really dated since a 3 year relationship in college, so I feel like I'm basically brand new at this. I've been going back and forth about it. Sometimes I think it's probably normal that the first wave of intense crushing has worn off, and I'm getting to know this person as a real person and not as someone I've made up in my head (the way you do during a crush stage), and that some uncertainty makes sense as I figure out what I want and like. But sometimes I wonder if it's wrong that I'm already feeling this way and that this kind of reality checking shouldn't be happening so early into getting to know someone. I think maybe I've also been single for so long that adjusting into being with someone feels a little strange and uncomfortable.

Any thoughts on this or experiences with what it's like to move through these early stages of dating in terms of how you feel about the person you're seeing would be super appreciated.

So I have been talking to this guy from a dating app for the past week. The conversation has been going so well and so flirty. I was super into it and wanted to take it further and go on a date. UNTIL…I found his Facebook profile and I feel so shallow for this but I am so not attracted to him now. His pictures are much different than what’s on his dating profile. I have the biggest ick and there’s no chance I want to go on a date now. I feel so bad if I just ghost him after the conversations we’ve had but I also don’t want him to know the real reason I’m ending it. I know I’m probably way overthinking it but that’s just what I do. I feel bad because I’m taking it from 100 to 0 and he won’t know why. HELP!! What do I say to him to end it?

Hey everyone so I recently got into a relationship about 4 months ago with this guy. He’s really nice, quiet at times and I really enjoy spending time with him. The only problem is I am plagued by extreme anxiety every single day. I find myself feeling a huge pit in my stomach every time I don’t get a reaponse back in like an hour, and I I always find myself asking probing questions for reassurance to him. For example, I’ll say: “I’m so excited to see you tomorrow!” In hopes that he will say the same and it will calm my fear that he may not want to see me (which I know doesn’t make sense because he likes me). We had an incident about 2 weeks ago where I guess I was annoying him a lot with my texting and I wanted to meet his brother. Come to find out he was already having a tough day and he basically got really quiet over text for a bit and my mind SPIRALED. I started crying and just thinking the absolute worst. His texting became kind of cold for a little bit but we both agreed to go to dinner. He gets in my car and I can tell immediately something is off. He sometimes has a hard time opening up about emotions but he did and was basically telling me that I’ve been putting ALOT of my anxiety on him while he’s at work, and over texting and it’s borderline obsessive. He told me, “it makes it seem like you like me so much more than I like you”. And for a second that hurt…. But what he really meant was that I was being obsessive and basically not giving him space. We talked for 3 hours and he was on the verge of breaking up with me because he was so stressed out that I was stressing him out. I totally understood his feelings and really reflected on how I’ve been texting and I’ve been a little bit too much. We agreed to make the relationship work and although I know he doesn’t really understand my anxiety and depression, I know I don’t want to lose him and I’m trying my best to really remain chill and not let the anxiety ruin my relationship. Any helpful tips on how to remain calm with the texting and not freaking out if he doesn’t initiate plans on the timeline I want, would be appreciated. I don’t want to feel like this anymore, and I constantly am like, “Would it be different with a different person, would I feel better?” And that just makes me spiral even more because in reality I don’t think this is about the other person… this is about me and my deep rooted fears of abandonment and fear that I’m not enough.

Hey guys, any advice would be greatly appreciated.

I (M24) have been dating a guy (M23). I don’t think the intentions were to start dating as we met online, but we had fun and at the end I said I would like to see him again and he agreed. Overall, I really like him, I think he’s great, and fun to be around.

There were a few things I put to the back of my mind from the off, that aren’t really red flags, but are not something I would go for in someone I’m dating as he seemed cool and the vibe was there, also, I’m single, and have been for a while, so maybe standards/expectations on my end were too high!

We’ve been dating just short of 2 months at the moment, he’s stayed at mine, I’ve stayed at his, met eachothers dogs, he’s met my best friend, going well as I say. This weekend, we saw eachother, and I can’t explain it, but I got this feeling whilst with him, that although I think he’s great, and the vibes great, and I enjoy his company, I don’t actually think we’re right together. There’s nothing to say he’s a bad person nor do I think I am, but there just seems to be a spark that’s kinda missing, whereby, seeing him feels no different to seeing a friend, not someone I want to declare love for, or see a future with.

I know I should be honest, but “it’s not you it’s me” doesn’t actually translate that way and saying I want to end it but without a reason is unfair also.

He’s not big on calls and he lives 45 minutes away, so I don’t really want to plan another date to end it, as I care about his feelings. We message daily but I’ve not found myself able to bring it into the conversation yet, mainly because I hate the thought of upsetting him.

Any advice on what to say and how to do it? 2 months is nothing in the grand scheme of things, but the longer I drag it on, the more he’s gonna be hurt.

in desperate help for my situation-ship. i (m19) cant lose her (f18)

My Nearly GF is confusing me and in a very weird position and like her so much and can’t lose her

ME - M19 HER - F18

Hey guys, this is my absolute last resort and it’s slowly killing me if i don’t get this sorted immediately.

So i’ve know this girl since we were about 14. Now this story starts in a place that i don’t remember me doing but i sort of do. so i was talking to this girl and we were getting along and she cared about me and was so happy to talk to me, but we weren’t dating yet. The only thing i do remember is how caring and loving she was. But around that time i was a bit of an a$$hole. i was a very stupid kid. So i got mixed up in this group in my school where they bullied and harassed and made threats to the girl i was talking to and for some reason i joined in. But again, i don’t remember doing that and thats how stupid i was, i was a kid seeking validation and attention. She was then in a few relationships that hurt her a lot and i hurt her a lot too but one specifically she had was BAD. So anyways over the past few years i’ve made attempts to apologise to her and even then i was still an a$$hole. But the past year i’ve really become a different person and i don’t recognise the old self. i don’t like thinking about the people i was involved with or my old self . So she still wasn’t accepting my apology and told me she was with someone

Now about 4 weeks ago i wanted to apologise to her with all my heart and i really meant every word i said. i told her every truth and apologised more than i ever could and i don’t think anyone in this chat will understand the lengths i went to to apologise. im talking writing paragraph after paragraph night and day and spending hours and hours constructing apologies from my heart. Im still so so so sorry for what i did to her. But the past few weeks shes had the chance to learn about me and for me to open up to her. i’ve been as vulnerable as a man can be to her and shes listened and shes been as vulnerable as she can be to me. She’s said things to me i wouldn’t relay to anyone else which may show that shes starting to trust me. Now shes started calling me cute names and sending cute tiktoks etc and im just wondering where we are. shes a heavy overthink but i can assure all you guys that i spend night and day reassuring her i will never do anything to harm her or anything close. She believes me and were slowly making progress. Ive told her i will be there for her no matter what and no matter what time or day. Ive told her things i wouldn’t say to anyone else and so has she. Ive taken the time to learn her and make notes. But shes a very anxious girl and thinks a lot and i don’t want to confront her on anything. Now this is where it gets to confronting. She starts conversations about the people we knew in my old school and the bad people even though i say to her “ are you sure you want to talk about this, i dont want to make you upset at all” and she says its fine.. but then it gets to the point where she says “those people called me this and that” and when i say “which people” (because there were a few) she replies with “ your best friends” but i tell her that i have no connection to them and its in my past but she tends to still say things like that even though she knows she gets upset about stuff like that. Now today i replied to what she said (your besties). i said “okay then, theyre not me friends” she says “ im gonna sleep now, goodnight sleep well ☺️” but on separate texts. she normally says ‘my love’ or ‘honey’ with a heart without fail. im just wondering what is going on and why she would bring up a topic she knows would upset her and then have me play guessing games all night what i said wrong. and as she said goodnight, i replied with - whats wrong is everything okay- she doesnt read it. its like she turns her phone straight away after saying goodnight.

we talk all day and everything goes so well and its so good and sweet. But theres always something she brings up that starts to self sabotage and she leaves me to play mental games all night even though i reply to her goodnight message asking whats wrong but she goes in an instant.

im a very apologetic person now and never like to leave things hanging, i will apologise even when im not wrong and i did that today, i apologised to her in the case i said something wrong. the thing is, were not official yet, we’ve never met but were both very very nervous. i spent days and days to get her back a few weeks ago and meant every word i said, ive been a good’ ‘bf’ so far and probably exceeded it to the point where she said to me “ ive never been treated so good and been given the time as much as you give me”

now weve talked about our future and our weddings etc and we really like each other.. like a lot and were so so similar and weve known each other for years but not always on the best terms. And recently weve grown and been really close but again, the thing is weve never met and shes really scared and shy to meet so i didnt mind giving her some time but then again she says she wants us to meet. she has been the one talking about the future the most and bringing up topics about meeting and she wants to take it slow at the same time. BUT i dont want her to leave and say that she needs time….

How can i keep her

TL;DR; :My situation-ship is leaving me with mind games but i cant confront her. she likes me a lot and says ive impacted her in a very good way and she wants me. weve been known for 4 years

GUYS PLEASE HELP IM AT MY WITS END HERE.

I am a 45 yr old divorced single dad who recently started talking to a girl who I knew she was obviously younger than I am. I never thought twice about talking with her, we hit it off right away and it’s seeming to grown into more of a relationship. I am looking for some advice on dates and conversations to have with her. Because I was married for 15 yrs and the woman I was married to was only a year younger than me, I don’t feel like I am in touch with the current dating world. That may sound ridiculous but I’m trying to be honest. Also the fact that this Girl is considerably younger than I am also makes me a little nervous. Any advice on conversations and Date ideas would be welcome. Thank you all in advance.

So pretty much I [18M] have a relatively new close friend [20M] that I know through college band, we started talking and hanging out around October, including going to her house for the first hangout and going to some parties. I had grown feelings and asked her on a date, but she rejected me saying she liked where our friendship was and wasn't really looking for anything serious. We have still been hanging out one-on-one and getting closer because she's a great friend, we connect and understand eachother well, and are really accepting of eachothers' odd nerdy personalities.

I still have some feelings that have definitely grown over this time of getting to know her simply because I haven't been super focused on getting over it or moving on(which may have been my mistake here). I have avoided thinking too much of anything because I know how I am as someone with an anxious-avoidant attachment style(working on it🫠) and my overthinking will cause me more harm than good. She's not the greatest with responding to texts which is sometimes frustrating but I understand that she may be busy or may not have the energy to respond, and when she's had to cancel on me she's given honest, valid reason and tried to reschedule.

Here's the issue though, throughout this time she's gotten more affectionate with me, including more physical gestures to greet me on game days such as hugs, a side hug where she rested her head on my shoulder, or a gesture of holding my hand for a few seconds. While some of these are questionable and I'm not at all used to it, I have been able to still brush it off as just being how she shows affection to friends and her feeling safe around me. But this past week she took me to go see her favorite new movie in theaters and as we were walking out of the theater to her car, she grabbed my arm and linked arms with me, which is very confusing because as far as I know, it's not a gesture you do as just friends. I'm not sure what's going on here and I don't know that I trust my own judgement as I have never been in a relationship or successful talking stage & to be honest, I have a history of being somewhat delusional. I don't want to be stupid and ruin our friendship or anything because regardless of if there's anything romantic or not, she matters a lot to me.

Does anyone have insight or advice for me here? Is communication key? Do I just need to not be delusional and put more work into getting over my feelings?

Recently separated & just want a lady friend to spend time with. I feel like I need compassion not relationship, whenever I get close to someone I go into my shell as I feel like I am cheating.

Been with my ex since college, don’t think I have any game never been on tinder.

It just gets lonely, my ex was best friend. It’s easier to talk to somebody rather than keeping it inside. I have buddies for ages but we don’t discuss emotional stuff. I don’t know much about tinder, never had the need in adult life as I was with a partner. Feels weird to do online dating

I recently hooked up with a coworker a few weeks after breaking up with my ex who I dated for 5 months…

This coworker and I have insane chemistry and we’re always flirting. One night my other coworker was like “omg can’t you see how he looks at you” and I’m always oblivious, so I said I didn’t see it.

Fast forward a week and we hooked up. It was hot and steamy and full of sexual chemistry…. It’s happened one time after and the second time wasn’t intentional.

We text decently but not always. I find myself catching some feelings, but I don’t feel like it’s mutual. I’ve tried to hang out with him more outside of work, but it’s either bad timing or we’re both busy. What should I think? What do I do? I don’t want to make it weird at work, so I feel like I should just back off and see if he tries with me?

Help! :)

This girl F33 I m30 met up with out of town once suddenly wants to drive down to see me. It's a three hour drive for her so she must really like me but the problem is she's coming up Friday night and leaving Sunday morning so we would be spending a whole day together. I've tried to think of anything I could do with her but I just can't. It's freezing outside so any outdoor activity is probably off the table. I hate to be this way but if we're just gonna sit there awkwardly for two days i don't know if I wanna do it. Any ideas would be greatly appreciated!

Been with my ex since college, don’t think I have any game never been on tinder, wanna chat and explore this new world of mine.

It just gets lonely, my ex was best friend. It’s easier to talk to somebody rather than keeping it inside. I have buddies for ages but we don’t discuss emotional stuff. I don’t know much about tinder, never had the need in adult life as I was with a partner. Feels weird to do online dating

Maybe others have similar feelings. Real communication can often break down superficial barriers.

So there was this guy I had a crush on for the longest time, one night we finally made out. We didn’t hook up but we almost did. I asked him at that time if we could see each other again and he said yes. I understand that it could have been in the spur of the moment but the thing is he kept saying things like « next time » or « can’t wait to see you again ». Then I texted him and he said he didn’t want to get involved with anyone that way so my question is, why couldn’t he just say so ?

Maybe you were in the fence about this person but you liked him/her a lot. You could sense there was a possibility and there was a good chemistry. But for whatever reason, maybe you were not sure if she liked you back , maybe you were not totally sure if you are attracted physically or maybe some other reason, you could not take the step , you could not decide. Then this person start dating someone and you reach hell. Suddenly you are extremely tormented by his or her thoughts.. suddenly a profound feeling of losing out. Why this happens ? Have you felt it ?

English is not my first language; Apologies in advance. (21M and new to dating)

A quick backstory: Okay so i matched with this cute girl(20F) about a month ago on Hinge. We had a great conversation which led to a first date initiated by me, about a week after our match. When the day came, she wrote me saying that she got a migrane attack and if i could move the date to 3 days later. I agreed and i thought we had an amazing date: we were laughing alot and i was enjoying her company. After the date i got her instagram and asked her out once more, for a second date, later that evening (when i came home).

I asked her out for the next week and she agreed very quickly, showing lots of interest in her text. This is were things go sideways: Two days before the date, she cancelled, saying that she maybe had a gym appointment with her friend(???) that day, but that she would be down same day next week. I unfortunately wanted to study for a big exam that week and declined. She later that day said that she could go on the date anyway. Two days later, when the date came, she cancelled again. Her reason: a busy workweek, but she asked if we could go on the date after my exams. I asked my friends for advice and they told me i should give her a last chance, so i agreed to a date after my exams. A little over a week later i asked if she was still down for a date, To which she showed excitement and we agreed on a date a week later.

This brings me back to the current date, which she cancelled 50 mins in meeting time saying she was overwealmed by work. (We even chatted abit yesterday with a bit of flirting). After this my friends told me i should cut her off and tell her that it was nice meeting her etc. Which i did. I got a response saying how sorry she was and that she really thought she would have the energy for the date, also saying it was nice meeting me.

My issue is that i really liked her alot (very pretty, sweet personality and even the same education/interests) and i am regretting cutting her off, even though it feeling kind of obvious that she don't want to date anyway.

Should i cut my losses and try to forget her or should i text her something?

Any advice appreciated.

I’ve been on 5 dates with this guy, we’ve been talking every day and things are casual but going well. It’s only been 3 weeks but his birthday is next week, and I don’t know if I should be getting him something small as a gift? I don’t know what is appropriate or if it’s rude to not really acknowledge his birthday? It’s so new but he’s great & I need help please!

Sooo here is the story! I (31 F) met this dude (30 M) at a Mexican Hispanic dance club 2 weeks ago he insisted on going on a date with me when I didn't have my kids or him as well since we both have the same kid schedule. Hes been really good at communicating and texting and what not. I am now seeing I think we might not be a good fit. He wants to go out with me again next week which will be 4 weeks of knowing each other but only date 2. He has mention a couple times he wants me to come over so he can cook for me and he also mentioned me coming over after our date to "watch" movies. He has also made plans with me to go hiking in January. So here is the problem I really am sexually attractive to him and think he cute but I really dont wanna be in a relationship... So would it be wrong to sleep with him.... and then kinda ghost him?

On multiple occasions, I (24F) realised that whenever my boyfriend (25M) and I argue or get into a fight, my boyfriend would go to his close girl friend to ask for advice and input about us. He would spill everything to her, even things that he knows i do not want others that aren’t close to me to know. My boyfriend and I recently got into quite a big fight which resulted in us not talking to each other for 1.5 weeks. After we made up, I found out that he was in constant contact with that close girl friend, even sending pictures of what they were having for their meals to each other, during the time that we weren’t talking. They were texting everyday and my boyfriend even drove over to her place (he claims that he didn’t go up to her house) and were just talking at the carpark. He told me that he went to her to ask for advice and input on our relationship. What do yall think of such a situation? I truly want to believe that there is nothing going on between the both of them, as they have been friends for 4/5 years. But as close as they are (to be able to share so many private things within themselves), I have never personally met his girl friend in person, so I genuinely do not know how she is like as a person. Am i overthinking too much?

Here’s the whole story that is confusing the fuck out of me. We met our sophomore year of college we became friends in October and in April I came out to my friend group as bisexual (which I’ve know for years). she has a boyfriend of a year however since I came out to her she has been making small hints at me at first it was asking if she was my type to which I responded not really(because she’s in a relationship) but then around the end of summer she started joking and saying what if we kissed or that we are fucking/in a secret relationship. These things have been said so much to the point I feel they aren’t jokes but I really can’t tell because sometimes she talks about her boyfriend and says things like they will get married. Her boyfriend has kind of been neglecting their relationship but not to the point I feel she should leave him. She recently came out to me when we were drunk and kept saying stuff like what if she switched sides and then said I should join her and her boyfriend I again said no, then we were playing video games together and talking about our types to which she says “I’m not your type” and I said well that’s not exactly true your not not my type and told her she has a boyfriend so that’s the reason she’s not and then she says something along the lines of he can go whenever. I’ve had feeling for her since around July I even went on a date with a girl and she was all I could think about the entire time and her saying all of this is not helping. I’m not sure if I should say anything about it or if she even has feelings for me I just need some advice on what to do

Hello all, I am 23M UK, I'm wondering how I should meet people. I don't have a large friend group and I don't do alot outside of work. Dating apps are dog shit when I tried them a few years ago so I doubt they've improved.

I've started going out for drinks on Saturdays with or without my friends and its barely fruitful.
I met my ex at a club, most advice I see online is "go out and meet people", how tf do I do this? It's easier said then done. I feel creepy or intimidating if I were to stop a beautiful woman on the street.

I recently met this guy at a concert (m27) and Im (f27) and we hit it off really well. We live in two different states so after the concert we planned a 3 day trip together. We talked for 3 weeks up until it. Before the trip, we texted a semi-good amount and he would say good morning and we had pretty good conversation. After the trip, I would say the communication is a little less and not really going anywhere. He still texts me and its not dry, just not very often. Hasnt said good morning anymore either. At night, when he’s on his phone he’s active on Instagram & Snapchat but doesn’t really text me back.He snaps A LOT which concerns me.. and I dont use that app.

I feel like after you meet someone (especially after a 3 day trip) , you should be excited and probably message more often right? I just feel like communication died down a tad. Should I distance and let him miss me..? I was interested in pursuing things with him, but I feel as if that might not be where he is at with me. At the same time, it was basically our first dates and I tend to get anxiously attached to people. He did say he takes things slow. Let me know, should I talk to him about it or is it too early and that would be too much. My mom told me to just let it be and not to scare him.

Also.. him and I didn’t hookup. He didn’t even try, I told him I reserve that for more serious talking. stages. He was very respectful and also told me he had a fun time, and wants to do it again. The plan he mentioned was 6 months from now. 😬 Im not used to slow burns, I guess I’m used to love bombing so this whole thing might be normal behavior and Im being obsessed. Be honest 😂

Before starting, sorry my english isn’t that great. ( he is from US and 25 years old ) We’ve been dating for 3months (during that time we stayed together for days and days). He committed about us. Explaining he never has felt like this in his life smt like this Then we became to live far away from each other and we knew that was coming.

A week ago, he was acting kinda weird so I asked. He said because of situation and distance thing, its not fair to commit for each other for now. After I introduced him as ‘boyfriend’ to my friends haha. Anyways of course I was sad but even so I understood him so I kept contacting him because I liked him a lot and he still kept contacting me and showing a lot and alot of affection.

Few days ago I kinda fell distance from him by texting. And I explained him that it’s hard to continuing being like this pretending nothing happened and i felt distance from your action. And he said he totally understand my feelings. And there was no more explanation.

I texted him again after that day, he answered in very cold way and eventually ended my text with reaction(idk if its right word, double tap on text thing with emoji) and I texted back ‘is that it’ smt like that this afternoon and until now he never answered and even didnt read my text yet.

Is it normal in there? Or he is just irresponsible person. Is that so hard to just end it well after communication from both way? I felt like i wasted my time and feelings 😭😭😭 I never have been dating with American man and never had this ‘situationship’ things in my life for this long time and didnt know that it might be me who’s gonna suffer from ‘situationship’ ahh My question is that is that it? Just like that?

Hi everyone! I’m going on a first coffee date a little later this afternoon, the guy seems super sweet, but he’s smothering me already. It’s been a multitude of things, but most recently I was talking about my diagnosed sleeping issues and he told me “Maybe you need someone to spoon with” and then when I didn’t respond in 50 minutes (I go to college and have finals this week all while working a full-time job) he messaged me again saying “I hope your day is off to a great start 😘” I’m just feeling like he’s a love bomber who does like me but it’s just a lot right away. I want to blow him off and maybe postpone to next week when I don’t have school anymore but I also make myself feel really guilty because I haven’t been dating much and I do have serious intentions. I also keep canceling dates like last week. I blew off a date because the guy asked me my opinions on sex and when I told him it’s a good way to strengthen a relationship, but probably a bad way to start one off he tried to get me to agree to having it on the first date. I just feel guilty cancelling/postponing all these dates. I’m only 20 though so I do have a lot of time to find my person. I want to hear everyone’s input. Thanks in advance!

Whoops! Crush

I have liked this guy at school for a while and I know he likes me back. We kissed at prom but we haven't kissed again. Today is the last day before winter break and I want to kiss he when we say goodbye, but I am worried. He has a final right after school for a class he is taking at community college and I know that for myself, I would be distracted thinking about the kiss and maybe have a hard time on the test. I don't want to do that too him. What should I do?

So I know this might seem like a simple question for many but I've had my problems with it. I simply don't know how to commit to start dating in general.

Turning 28 next year I dating was usually never really on my mind and thus never had any romantic interest and never went on a date. Which likely isnt something that will help me this late when most people will have years of experienceof and i'll be nervous about many firsts for me. In general I'm a very introverted person and I don't have any hobbies that would allow me to meet someone by chance. I'm aware of that but I also like my hobbies and wouldn't change them for an ulterior motive just like I wouldn't go out in a bar or somewhere to try and meet someone. That's not me. I don't just go out to bars. Never have and never will. Being around too many people is simply exhausting for me. Besides I don't even drink. Dating via apps will be my only realistic option.

That being said since you see this question dating has been on my mind for a little while now or rather more frequently. But I always seem to be putting it off. When I was living at my parents after school I told myself I'd rather have a stable job first. Then that I wouldn't want to date someone while still living at my parents house. When I was financially stable i moved out (pretty late since that was only last year but I get along with my parents well). When I moved out I told myself I wouldn't date someone until I got a hang of how to live on my own. Cook, clean etc. I wouldn't want to leech of my partner. Admittedly I still am a bit lazy at times about some things and I am painfully aware of my shortcomings and hold myself to higher standards on those these days.

I guess you get the idea. I always feel like I'm "not good enough" and need to be perfect before dating knowing full well that it's nonsense in the end and nobody is perfect and everybody is dealing with their own situations even while dating. But that's what's holding me up even if I know what the problem is.

Not to mention my problems with talking to and opening up to essentially strangers. I'm not good at small talk. Not even with friends. It's just not something I'm naturally able of even if I try. Given a topic I care about I can talk about it no problem. I'm unsure how I could keep a conversation going in the hypothetical scenario of a date. I'm much more able to express my feelings and open up via text. Otherwise I could never write this. I wouldn't be able to bring this up with my friends either.

I wonder if others have been in a similar situation. How they went about it. Or just have advice that could help me to not keep prolonging my procrastination of the topic. I know I'd regret not to try it in the end. I'd really like to say that I at least tried dating by the end of next year.

If you'd made it through this wall of text, thanks for spending the time. I'm glad for any suggestions you might have. And if you have any question I'll try to answer them when I see them.

So I have it marked "short-term relationship" on hinge. Now, I'm not good at flirting. However, I feel like a piece of shit cus even tho I thought it was playful enough, but now I feel it's creepy.

"How do you feel about playing spin the bottle, but one-on-one?" Is it too creepy? I'm worried it might be.

My Nearly GF is confusing me and in a very weird position and like her so much and can’t lose her

ME - M19 HER - F18

Hey guys, this is my absolute last resort and it’s slowly killing me if i don’t get this sorted immediately.

So i’ve know this girl since we were about 14. Now this story starts in a place that i don’t remember me doing but i sort of do. so i was talking to this girl and we were getting along and she cared about me and was so happy to talk to me, but we weren’t dating yet. The only thing i do remember is how caring and loving she was. But around that time i was a bit of an a$$hole. i was a very stupid kid. So i got mixed up in this group in my school where they bullied and harassed and made threats to the girl i was talking to and for some reason i joined in. But again, i don’t remember doing that and thats how stupid i was, i was a kid seeking validation and attention. She was then in a few relationships that hurt her a lot and i hurt her a lot too but one specifically she had was BAD. So anyways over the past few years i’ve made attempts to apologise to her and even then i was still an a$$hole. But the past year i’ve really become a different person and i don’t recognise the old self. i don’t like thinking about the people i was involved with or my old self . So she still wasn’t accepting my apology and told me she was with someone

Now about 4 weeks ago i wanted to apologise to her with all my heart and i really meant every word i said. i told her every truth and apologised more than i ever could and i don’t think anyone in this chat will understand the lengths i went to to apologise. im talking writing paragraph after paragraph night and day and spending hours and hours constructing apologies from my heart. Im still so so so sorry for what i did to her. But the past few weeks shes had the chance to learn about me and for me to open up to her. i’ve been as vulnerable as a man can be to her and shes listened and shes been as vulnerable as she can be to me. She’s said things to me i wouldn’t relay to anyone else which may show that shes starting to trust me. Now shes started calling me cute names and sending cute tiktoks etc and im just wondering where we are. shes a heavy overthink but i can assure all you guys that i spend night and day reassuring her i will never do anything to harm her or anything close. She believes me and were slowly making progress. Ive told her i will be there for her no matter what and no matter what time or day. Ive told her things i wouldn’t say to anyone else and so has she. Ive taken the time to learn her and make notes. But shes a very anxious girl and thinks a lot and i don’t want to confront her on anything. Now this is where it gets to confronting. She starts conversations about the people we knew in my old school and the bad people even though i say to her “ are you sure you want to talk about this, i dont want to make you upset at all” and she says its fine.. but then it gets to the point where she says “those people called me this and that” and when i say “which people” (because there were a few) she replies with “ your best friends” but i tell her that i have no connection to them and its in my past but she tends to still say things like that even though she knows she gets upset about stuff like that. Now today i replied to what she said (your besties). i said “okay then, theyre not me friends” she says “ im gonna sleep now, goodnight sleep well ☺️” but on separate texts. she normally says ‘my love’ or ‘honey’ with a heart without fail. im just wondering what is going on and why she would bring up a topic she knows would upset her and then have me play guessing games all night what i said wrong. and as she said goodnight, i replied with - whats wrong is everything okay- she doesnt read it. its like she turns her phone straight away after saying goodnight.

we talk all day and everything goes so well and its so good and sweet. But theres always something she brings up that starts to self sabotage and she leaves me to play mental games all night even though i reply to her goodnight message asking whats wrong but she goes in an instant.

im a very apologetic person now and never like to leave things hanging, i will apologise even when im not wrong and i did that today, i apologised to her in the case i said something wrong. the thing is, were not official yet, we’ve never met but were both very very nervous. i spent days and days to get her back a few weeks ago and meant every word i said, ive been a good’ ‘bf’ so far and probably exceeded it to the point where she said to me “ ive never been treated so good and been given the time as much as you give me”

now weve talked about our future and our weddings etc and we really like each other.. like a lot and were so so similar and weve known each other for years but not always on the best terms. And recently weve grown and been really close but again, the thing is weve never met and shes really scared and shy to meet so i didnt mind giving her some time but then again she says she wants us to meet. what do i do guys?

TL;DR; :My situation-ship is leaving me with mind games but i cant confront her. she likes me a lot and says ive impacted her in a very good way and she wants me.

GUYS PLEASE HELP IM AT MY WITS END HERE.