hi! I just wrote my first draft of my personal statement and would love for someone to look over it. anything from grammar, content, or organization would help. i need brutal honesty and i have until november to submit it so plenty of time to revise!!

it has themes of loss, personal growth, and acceptance. even if these don't resonate with you I would love to hear your opinion! my max word count is 650 and the prompt is: 'Discuss an accomplishment, event, or realization that sparked a period of personal growth and a new understanding of yourself or others.'

if you're interested please comment and i can pm you!!

**disclaimer: this essay is about a close friend of mine who passed away and i'd like anonymous people to preferably read it just because it is a bit vulnerable! however, i wanted it to be a little vague, just so it wasn't just trauma dumping. i want to show how this event shaped me into who i am today without it sounding like a biography! please lmk if you think it's not a strong personal essay. this is my second/third time switching up my topic, but i think this is the one i want to stick with

Hi guys!! I just finished my personal essay. It's about my father working abroad and my mother being the only one raising me. I think it's good but it needs some adjustments so I need a new set of eyes. Can someone help me with some advice? I can pm the essay. Thank you!!

My draft of my personal statement is pretty much done, but it’s at 574 words so I’d like to flesh things out depending on advice. I’d love feedback/criticism.

I’m also a better editor than writer lol and I’ve won some regional writing awards, so I can give decent feedback! Comment or DM me

Wrote a rough draft of a personal growth essay, I think it’s good but i’d like someone else’s opinion on it

title - can anyone help me go over my essay? if ur also writing an essay we could help each other out

i want to submit my rolling application to pitt by saturday can someone please review my personal essay

Hey! Can any of y'all help me out by taking a look at my essay? I like it, but my counselor thinks I should make some changes. I'd love to hear what y'all have to say, and I'm down for checking an essay in return

I’m looking for someone that can read and give their opinion on my essay, I can also do the same in return! I’m just trying to make sure that my essay isn’t too cliche or anything.

So like the title said I'd like some critiques/advice on my essay. Be as harsh as you want, i just want this to be good. Here is the essay

Three years, three years to make a mark in a new school, three years to meet people, three years to grow. Being raised in a military family came with challenges. We would move every three years to a new place, sometimes even a new country, where it was a struggle meeting new people, and learning the area. It forced me to be resilient, and adaptive, to connect with people. But then in three years time, move again. When we moved to Ohio, it would be a new experience, my dad was planning to retire from the navy, and I would finish high school here. I went from going the speed of light through 5 schools, to a Sunday drive through one. Since moving here I have formed deeper connections with the people I have met. I joined the swim team, which became my obsession throughout high school. I realized that moving had taught me things that I would never have realized if we had moved again. The discipline i had grown up learning and the resilience through hardship let me thrive in this new environment. Academically, I developed better study habits, I improved my test taking abilities, and challenged myself with AP classes and College courses.  Physically, I pushed myself in the gym, and in a sport I had just picked up my freshman year, grew to be a captain, and a possible state qualifier in a relay with my teammates. Growing up through each successive move was hard, but they taught me so many things, but still I hunger to learn more, to improve more, to understand others more. Through slowing down, I truly learned the meaning of Walter Hagen's quote, "You’re only here for a short visit. Don’t hurry. Don’t worry. And be sure to smell the flowers along the way."

im applying to uva and id love some advice on how my essay looks from a few other people. please let me know if you can !!

I wrote out my draft of a montages essay. Is there anyone willing to take a look at it for me?

I’m applying for Duke rice NYU UPenn and Colombia and wanted to know if anyone could review my essay and tell me whether it is something that will help my application or hurt it. I want to know how good it is and would appreciate a pair of fresh eyes looking at it.

Hello, can somebody review my essay.

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Hello, I'm beginning to plan out my common app essay (I'm aware I'm a little late to this 😭) but I wanted to know peoples thoughts on my topic idea and outline. For context I plan on answering prompt 6 which is the passion essay.

Essay ideas: I want to write my essay about the importance that environmentally and ecologically concious agriculture (no-till faming) has to me. This way of farming keeps the health of the ecosystem and planet in mind rather than stripping the soil of its life and spraying tons of synthetic chemicals. There are many reasons that this topic is important to me and I will list those: Preservation of ecosystems for future generations because the people alive now are not the only people who will live in this planet, the reduction in chemical residues on our foods for the health of our society (my mom got really sick and suspects it's from consistently consuming food with pestide residues on it), allowing nature to thrive to making the world a healthier and enjoyable place for all life forms, and the community that comes from small scale agriculture. As far as personal connections to this topic: I have always loved the outdoors throughout my life and I think preserving it so myself and future generations can continue to enjoy it, I want to start a small vegetable farm and I currently have a fairly large garden where I employ these soil practices and I plan on starting a farm stand in the spring to sell my produce to my neighbor's and community.

I definitely think I can write about this topic but I'm not too sure what my hook should be and how to format it. I feel like a lot of essays are stories but this topic isn't really a story, rather it's an idea. Any suggestions for how to start it and write it would be great!!

Can someone help me re-word my college essay. I have a good idea and wrote it but i’m not a great writer and I don’t know how to make it sound more authentic and emotional. i’ll dm it but pls don’t charge me bc i can’t afford it 😭

hey, i want to secure my career in cybersecurity field so thats why i am choosing Computer science in college,but i am really skeptical about one thing, should i choose Bachelors in CS or Computer science engineering?

Hey! Would anyone be able to review my common app essay? I think I'm close to a final draft, but I need some outsider perspective.

Is anyone willing to help review my ideas and give advice on how to improve or like give tips in order to make it acceptable and better for competitive schools?

Is this a good college essay topic: I love to crochet and I wrote about the different types of crochet stitches and how they each mean something different in my life and help me create the tapestry of my life

Lmk

My topic is about being a homophobic while being gay, and how i slowly realized that was a bad mindset- any feedback would be greatly appreciated. If you can help, plz lmk

Is this a good college essay topic: How I believe that I was different things in my past lives (ex. A queen an artist a wizard a healer an explorer) and through reincarnation i became who I am now with different aspects and personalities of my previous lives.

Any help would be greatly appreciated

just looking for someone to do a quick read-over and comment on what they learned about me from the essay (to see if i communicated everything clearly) and maybe on structure/pacing if you want

thank you so much!!! it's much appreciated :)

I feel it might be weak or too basic, I'd really appreciate if someone could review it and give some critique!

So the topic I want to write about basically how the different aquarium ecosystem communities that I have built relates to the community I have built in my school and town and how much I value that, the issue is I can’t really recall a good story to go with that strong topic so my question is what type of story should I try to write about. As in if you were to pick the idealish story to go with this topic what would it be because I’m sure I have it to some degree

title. pls dm and ill send my essay!

prompt: Describe your reasons for wanting to study and what interests you about animation and interactive media. Please include the influences on your work (e.g. film, television, literature, art, design, music, people or culture) (maximum 400 words).

Animation has always been a part of my life ever since I was a child. Not by force; but by choice. As a young, primary school kid, I’d remembered myself drawing up goofy stories on a notepad to create animation flipbooks. For instance, one involving Mr Organised of the unrivalled Mr Men series doing a fantastical pencil dive. I spent hours on it - even winning a “Young Artist Award” for it and have continued to indulge in such activities. I embraced my introduction to the concept that simple 2D drawings can form a unique and literally moving world only limited by the imagination and time - which I definitely had. I’d never thought it’d be a career choice, just some recess fun in primary school; but here I am, dreaming of working in animation.

I’ve also gotten involved with 3D animation in my now limited free time, using Source Filmmaker to create fight scenes to explore the technical aspects of choreography. I consider how I position characters to simulate robotic movements, heavy impacts or flashy scenes. This is due to my interest in television shows like Regular Show and modern Japanese anime, such as the famed series: One Piece. I don’t simply sit down to watch. While I do absolutely relish in it's storytelling, among others - I pause the episode to evaluate how characters’ shapes are manipulated, or how frame colours are inverted to construct formerly unseen and impactful action.

Even now as a young adult, I’m captivated by this industry’s charm. So much so, that I’m in both my school’s art and visual communication design class simultaneously. I am also in classes involving higher mathematics and physics, but they not make me happy. It’s like a cage on the creativity I wish to express. With this opportunity presented to me to potentially study animation at the best Australian university specialising in art and design, I am undoubtedly enthusiastic about taking up this chance to improve my technical skills and pursue my dreams of eventually working in a renowned animation studio. Since, I don’t want a job that’ll make me unhappy for years as I fantasise about what my dream life could’ve entailed. I want a career that I’ll be happy to walk into each day, imagining what worlds I’ll be animating next and having all the time in the world to do so.