I'm not sure I agree with the practice, but my son's school has attendance awards every 2 weeks for the class with the highest average attendance. My son's class has never won and he is upset. He goes to school every day, I've even offered him to skip school one day to do something fun and he refused.

I want to give him an award myself for trying so hard. I guess I'm worried about the message it sends. He won't always win. I won't always be able to make it better. What do you think?

My mum is the type of person who forgives easily and is extremely kind that I feel it's now a bad thing for herself and my younger siblings. My siblings always take advantage of this and that makes me angry. They rarely receive any heavy punishment if they do anything wrong because they know which button to press to escape it, or if she punishes them she regrets her actions immediately, she ends up lifting the punishment. We have tried on having a conversation about it for a while then she factory resets back. Could it be my parent alone or it's normal for everyone?

I've jumped on and off the fence with wanting kids I may as well be signed up for agility. I visited my close cousin who moved out of state years ago but now has a 10 month old baby. I only spent a week with her family and my sister who traveled with me as well. I was so spent by the end of the week it made me scared to have a kid.

My cousin is absolutely consumed by her baby (in a good way) and wanting to spend every waking moment she can with her baby. But that did mean every part of the trip the baby was in tow even in instances where perhaps the baby should have stayed home with dad (ie would not fall asleep for his nap and then the window to being able to go do an activity we had planned was closing). Instead of baby staying with dad the baby came in tow and was more difficult to keep happy because he was tired.

Now I do have a social meter that was also being affected simply by not being able to go off and spend some time alone and my husband wasn't there either. That definitely was playing a role in my energy through the week. But was really spent me was that we would take turns who would be in the backseat with the baby and try to keep her happy which was honestly getting so tiring to do. Like it was getting old doing it but also just the energy it took especially when he was getting really fussy. I honestly just wanted to let him cry as the end of the week approached because I felt so spent putting all this energy forth to stay so animated to keep baby's attention.

I really only did it for my cousins sake because whenever he would cry she would say in a really sad voice "oh poor baby, oh poor baby, it's okay" over and over. So I felt I couldn't let the baby cry even if it drained me and if what it needed I couldn't provide. My sister wasn't nearly as good as I was with keeping the baby from crying which is when I heard the "oh poor baby" in a heart breaking mom voice a lot. When it was my turn in the back I put all of my energy to keep her baby happy or at least not crying but it 100% drained me especially on longer car rides.

By the last two days I wanted to be nowhere near the baby. It had me wondering if it was my own baby would that made a difference. Like would I share the same sentiment or at least one like it where I would want to spent every moment with my baby. That I would leap and comfort at almost every cry and still be joyous and happy at the end of the day. All I felt was spent but I also am not a mother and I am not his mom so I don't have all those hormones bonding me to him.

My son loves hot wheels and trucks and basically anything that's huge and on wheels. He's also not shy about digging through mud and dirt.

But after he's done with all that stuff and it's time for bed, he'll snuggle up with his pink stuffed bunny.

He also loves the Disney Princess movies and won't hesitate to point them out if they're on a shirt, or an item in the store.

My (23F) brother “Eric” (7M) broke something of mine that was very sentimental to me (it’s oddly specific, so for anonymity’s sake, I won’t be sharing what it was). Ultimately, he was roughhousing inside with some friends, and it fell and shattered. It can’t be replaced, but it was an accident.

After this happened, Eric was devastated. He went as far as calling a friend of mine to ask if he could get me a new one somehow. My parents had told me what happened, but before Eric worked up the courage to tell me himself, he was so upset with himself. He wasn’t eating or sleeping well, and clearly felt bad about his actions. The next day, with some encouragement from my parents, he called me. He was honest about what happened, gave me his iPad and some of his favorite toys to effectively punish himself, and asked if I still loved him. That broke my heart. So I sat down with him and we had a long conversation. I was confident that he’d be way more careful next time, and gave his devices and toys back, telling him it was because he handled the situation well, and didn’t lie about it or make excuses.

My parents said I can handle it how I see fit, but my dad thinks I’m being too lenient with him and that he should have some consequence. I generally don’t see eye to eye on things with my dad, and feel that because there’s no way to make it “right” so to say, there’s no reason to punish Eric further. So I wanted to reach out and ask you guys, was I too lenient? Or did Eric put himself through enough of a consequence?

Asking this from a genuine place because I’m unsure if having kids is financially in the picture for me and my partner anymore.

I read a lot about how much it costs to have a baby, but not as much about the long term ongoing costs as they get older (food, education, activities, clothes, increases in utility bills, hygiene items, gifts, birthday parties/celebrations, etc.).

If you’re open to sharing if you’re in a high, medium, or low cost of living area and if you’re doing public or private school, that would also be very appreciated. :)

I just found out that another mom at my children's preschool has a TikTok presence with a sizeable following. She's been taking videos at the private school our children attend and you can see other people's kids and parents in the background of the videos. Is there a way to get TikTok to remove the ones that show me and my children? Or would they not care if it wasn't close up?

I tried to report a video but it doesn't have an option to say that it was filmed without consent. If it was in public, I could see how it was legal, but I haven't signed anything saying my kids can be filmed on school property.

Is there another way to contact TikTok besides reporting the videos? I couldn't find anything.

We currently have 2 mid-size SUVs. A 2012 subaru outback and a 2018 Mercedes GLC 300. Not sure which one we will trade in. Mercedes has way more trade in value but Subaru is getting old at 200K miles and might need replacement soon (who knows?)

We want more room.

Looking to choose between two styles

1. Subaru Ascent, Toyota Grand Highlander, or Honda Pilot

2. Toyota Sienna or Honda Odyssey

I love that the new Siennas are hybrid and get 38mpg

About us: we work from home, have two active boys in sports, and go camping quite a bit. We don’t go on multi day road trips but want to in the future.

What do I need to consider? We probably won’t use the 3rd row seats often but like the idea of them and the extra space.

So I’m 27 and my husband is 48. Our relationship is very good, we’ve been married 5 years and have a healthy four year old, financially stable both with good jobs. Up until two weeks ago I would have said we were both in good health, except my husband recently had a stroke caused by high blood pressure he was unaware of. It looks like he will recover fully and fairly quickly, but the reason I mention this is because it puts an even bigger question mark on our situation. I will note, he is now on medication and has his BP under control.

I have PCOS and conceiving is just a really difficult thing for me, and so knowing that my husband is approaching 50 is really making me feel like my own clock is ticking despite me still being in my 20s. That pressure on top of not being able to conceive another child easily gets to me a lot, and now this stroke/respecting the time he needs to recover is really making me wonder if I should just forget my dream of having more than one child altogether.

I know that age is a more important factor for women, so fortunately we don’t have to worry about that right now, I’m just wondering what the consensus is from all of you based on our particular situation.

Not looking for medical advice. I want to know what you do when you know something is wrong with your kiddo but specialist keep defering responsibility. How do parents get their voice heard?

Back in September 2023 my son, who was two at the time, had a UTI. Because he is so young and a male, they checked his kidney and we found out that he has grade 3 VUR. He is now seen by a urologist. Since we’ve established that relationship I’ve had to bring him into urgent care every two or so months for what appears to be a UTI. Every time the initial sample comes back showing abnormalities, such as white blood cells, so he is put on antibiotics while we wait for the culture results. And every time the culture comes back negative. Between going to urgent care and the results from the culture, the symptoms clears up which I’ve always credited to the antibiotics. 80% of the time it’s just cloudy and smelly urine so it’s been chalked up to dehydration. He drinks a lot of water, especially now that these symptoms have been an issue so I haven’t really bought that explanation, but I’m not a doctor. The last time we went in was really bad. When I first noticed the urine getting cloudy, I started pumping him with water. But then his urine turned the darkest I’ve l seen any urine in my almost 40 years on this earth. And I’ve seen some dark urine when taking care of my elderly father in law who refused to drink anything besides Diet Coke. My son was in so much pain he couldn’t sleep through the night. But once again, the culture came back negative so urology says it’s not within their scope to figure out what’s going on. The pediatrician, who’s been extremely supportive, sent a referral to Nephrology. But since we’re going to urgent care for suspected UTIs, they say I need to go to urology.

Is it unreasonable of me to want answers? I don’t know what to do from here and hoping someone can give advice on how I can get action. Thanks

Edit - additional info:

I don’t take him to urgent care every time he starts showing symptoms. I always try his pediatrician first because he is managing the chronic UTIs but there are two reasons we’ve ended up at urgent care. 1.) My son has been in pain on weekends and the after hours nurse tells us to go to urgent care and 2.) Sometimes none of the pediatricians in the office have availability and they recommend going to urgent care. We go to a children’s specific urgent care who’s in the same children’s hospital as the urologist & nephrologist. The children’s hospital also has a relationship with the pediatrician. One more thing to note - the children’s Hospital’s urgent care we go to has rotating pediatricians seeing patients. Similar to a standard ER.

Alright let me preface this by saying I'm not attacking anyone or their parenting style with this question. This is an honest question, but all too often you can't ask about this stuff because parents get super defensive and go "you can't understand till you have kids." And the conversation goes nowhere.

I'm in my mid-30s, married, probably going to be having children soon, so I'm genuinely curious about this. Why does it seem so common for parents to be pushovers or ruled over by their kids nowadays? All too often I hear "yeah we HAD to watch Frozen a thousand times" "yeah we're NOT ALLOWED to listen to the music we like anymore" and it's always a similar reasoning. "Oh they'll scream and whine the whole time if I don't give them what they want." "It was the first time we got to eat out in months and I just wanted peace and quiet so yeah I let him have an iPad out at dinner." They claim they're choosing their battles, picking peace over conflict, but it just seems like they're being literally ruled over by their kids. "Yeah when my three year old wants McDonalds we HAVE to go get it for her or she'll keep tantruming until we do" is a real quote I heard from a coworker of mine.

Is this a new trend? Or were my parents a special case? We watched what they wanted to watch, we listened to the radio stations they wanted to listen to, I was not allowed a Gameboy in situations where I was expected to be present and social like dinnertime. Sure it wasn't 24/7, I had opportunities to watch The Lion King and listen to kids music, but at the end of the day my parents were in charge.

Now yeah I get it when some parents were abused as kids, and now they're trying to break the cycle and not resort to the same tactics as adults, and I'm totally behind that. Some parents out there have been verbally, emotionally, physically abusive, and I think the more people who stand against that the better.

Anyway that's my kind of long meandering question - has parenting changed? Is it still possible to raise my kids to be proper and well-behaved without kowtowing to their demands? I just see so many permissive and pushover parents with little entitled monsters and I dunno how to rectify my concerns over my own soon-to-be children.

I'm a teenage girl who lives with my mom. lately I've been frustrated because I'm realizing that she doesn't understand me, and hasn't understood me my whole life. shes "always been tough", and comes from a different culture.

she "doesn't understand why" I have a bad body image because she's "always been confident", even as a teen. she "doesn't understand" why I'm so sensitive. she doesn't understand my head; I'm told to pray mental illness away instead of getting a therapist, even though she's seen how mental illness has affected me. she doesn't understand why I want to dress modestly instead of "wearing bright colors and crop tops".

I'm sentimental, but she's more of an "it is what it is" person. for example, I was telling her about how I'll be sad and miss my senior friends after they graduate, and she was like "yup. they're growing up and so are you." she's not wrong, but in that moment I'm not looking for facts. I'm looking for comfort. Idk.

My sister and me were talking about her son (4yo) that is getting very easily offended or angry lately. He gets really angry and sometimes even aggressive.

Like there is a tiger and he says it's a lion, we correct him and say it's a tiger. He gets mad and wants to hit us. Or the other day, I was eating cheese with him and his younger brother (soon 3yo). When it was his brother's turn to get a piece, I freshly cut, he tried to catch it and I avoided him and just said next is for him. Again, he was mad and run to the other room, sit in the corner and cried. He wants to wear clothes that are too small fir him, I tell him that he will be uncomfortable because the clothes are too tiny and he gets mad. So I turn the sentence into you are a big boy the jacket is for your little brother and he still gets mad and offended. Last week he was offended because I didn't wear the shirt he wanted me to wear and cried during in the car during the whole ride, saying how bad I am and so.

It just feels like we can't communicate anymore as he gets always offended. He wasn't like this, he was really easy going. Of course sometimes he had his bad moments, but it was once in a while. Since over a week now it's all the time for little stuff.

Did you experience something similar? Did you figure out what the reasons were? Did you find a solution? Was it just a phase and it passed by itself?

I 16F am the daughter to my mother 43F. My mother is a hardworking person. Constantly working her butt off just to provide for us. She’s a caring mother and supports us in all ways imaginable. On my birthday she took me to our grandparents house. Her father ails from dementia since around 2009. He cannot walk or speak. She promised to take me to a restaurant and that it would be a quick 5 minute errand. It ended up being 5 hours total. Both my grandmother and my aunt insisted to my mother she just takes me the restaurant as it has been a long time. I agreed on the side. Thirty minutes later she took me to the side and said ‘shut up I love my dad more than you. You are not on the main list sit down and wait.’ and left to go care for her father. It’s been about 4 months since and I think about it everyday. I feel she had no right to say that to me. If she truly felt that way she at least didn’t need to tell me. My father isn’t in the picture and so the person I love the most is my mother. It hurts that the person I love the most said I’m ‘not even on the list’ am I exaggerating and need to let go? Or do I tell her how I feel about it? Also if any of you can pls tell me how to let go of this feeling. Thanks

My 9 year old daughter is a very sensitive girl. She gets upset over everything. Especially when it comes to her dad (also my husband).

Whenever she gets in trouble (by him or me) she starts telling me how much she dislikes her dad. It feels like she is trying to distract me from what caused her to be in trouble in the first place. I can't tell if she is genuine in her feelings about him or trying to separate he and I.

Example: I'm trying to help her get ready for a school event the next day. She is giving me a very hard time about it. Arguing about the shoes, clothes, and what the teacher says. She keeps crying and throwing a fit. I'm trying to get her to calm down. My husband yells from the other room "if your going to act like that then you won't participate in the event! Etc..." She starts crying more and goes on about how he always chimes in when it's just me and her. (Yes, he always undermines me, I hate that too, but he thinks he is helping I guess...).

Anyway this goes on forever. She starts telling me how he is mean to her all the time and isn't a nice dad. She tells me she loves me more then dad. The only thing I say is "Dad loves you. He wants the best for you. Dad is trying was trying to help.. I'm sorry your feeling that way...."

Everything she says sits in my fucking brain and weighs on me. Then I end up fighting with my husband about it.

Same old fight... Me: her feelings are hurt, she says your not nice to her... Him: so what? She can't act like that! Me: I agree but you can't control the situation when I'm trying to handle it! Don't butt in like that. Him: your clearly not handling the situation, you never do... Me: oh so implying I'm a shit mother?! Him: you never handling any situation! You weren't doing anything to stop her from acting out!... Etc etc...

So, let's have it. Please tell me wtf do I say to my child??! Wtf do I say to my husband??!

Sorry about the dumb question, but this is one thing I'm really anxious about. As someone going into the programming field, cutting out all contact and being 100% focussed on work is really important for my productivity, and right now when I have no children and no one who really relies on me, this is quite simple, just turn off everything with notifications and go off the grid, don't talk to me for the next ten hours. But when I have children, they're going to need attention from someone constantly. From what I hear about those early years, it's exhausting. You don't even get to sleep fully, you don't get alone time even if you need to pee, screw your personal space. Leaving the kids with strangers in their early years especially scares me tbh, they can't tell me if something happened, I'm not close by, and I want to be there but I also need to work.

I could seek out a partner who wants to be a stay at home spouse but the idea of leaving someone to deal with such an overwhelming task on their own and screw their dreams for the next however many years until all the young ones are in school feels wrong? I'm not entirely opposed to it but is there an alternative? And what if something happens and my spouse isn't able to reach me? What if my spouse has a medical emergency? Am I just magnifying an issue (or several) in my head and being a helicopter parent before I've even had kids?

TL;DR: Parents who's career relies heavily on deep work, how are you doing it?

32M, have been married for 3 years now, and my father passed away in 2016, so as I have gotten older, my mother and I have become closer and had more serious talks with one another, just about life in general.

She has said this on a few occasions, not to belittle or talk shit, just as an observation of sorts. I don't know that it makes me feel great being on the receiving end of it, but I also really don't take offense to it, as despite traveling for work, I do a lot to make sure that she and my brother are taken care of.

She means it in a literal and figurative sense, as the wife will typically want to stay close to her family especially when kids come (obviously assuming it's a good relationship) but it's also in the metaphorical sense of growing up. Just wondering if anyone else has heard this before or has any thoughts on it. Thanks.

What i have seen from trailers it seems like the perfect movie to watch with a girl you like

would it matter if i watch it beforehand or should i wait?

I’m 7 months pregnant and I’m starting to show quite a bit now and I’m having people try and touch my touch and I hate it. And I’ve heard people tell me just to wait until my girl is born and that people will try and touch HER! How true is that? It’s making me really nervous since I’m not a very confrontational person but that will definitely stress me out. How did you guys if ever handle strangers touching your kids/ babies?

Just found out i’m pregnant with our third (and probably last) baby. I’m only about 5 weeks. Our first was a boy, second was a girl and i’m HOPING for this one to be a girl. I know it’s basically 50/50 so wanted to see how everyone elses were! Hoping for (BOY, GIRL, GIRL)

So my daughter turned 2 a week ago and I still take baths and shower with her. It’s easier, she hates the tub and shower and it honestly chills her out when we are both in there playing with toys/ singing or what not. She hates having water dumped on her head so when I hold her on my lap or standing up and we sing she doesn’t scream at the top of her lungs.

My mom freaked when I told her about it, and was like that’s so inappropriate she’s not a baby anymore. She asked how I held her/ picked her up and I was like.. the same way I usually do? She freaked. She was like you and her being naked and holding her is creepy and disgusting and will traumatize her. Now I’m like freaking out, is that strange? She’s 2! Maybe it is I don’t know. When is that weird? After a shower/ bath we both get wrapped in a towel and I dress her and then myself. I didn’t think I was doing anything wrong, but now I’m not sure.

In a few weeks I’ll be going on a 10 year reunion with a bunch of international friends. We’re all convening in one spot, which hasn’t happened in well 10 years. One of the friends in the group is expecting a baby, and his partner will be 3 weeks away from the due date when the reunion happens.

I thought it would be nice if the other 7 of us sign a ‘congrats on the new baby’ card, which I would then send once the birth announcement happened.

Obviously this means we’ll be writing congrats before the birth (assuming she didn’t give birth early in which case it’s not an issue). Also if, heaven forbid, something went wrong then I wouldn’t send the card.

If you received a card from a bunch of friends and you knew they’d signed the card before the baby was born, would you feel weird about it?

Might be overthinking this, but my autism makes these types of situations a bit less clear to me!

He will be 1 in a week and still will only sleep if cuddled. He can be sound asleep and when we carefully transfer to his crib he immediately wakes and is hysterical (even tried heating pad on low to have it warm for him) I have tried patting him back to sleep, picking up and calming him then laying him back down and he begins crying again. I’ve tried just letting him cry even though it’s something I said I’d never do but he will calm down but hasn’t put himself to sleep this way yet.. checking in about 10 min intervals. He gets really upset when I re-enter the room. He used to sleep so good when he was 3-5 months and would sleep through the night in his bassinet. Now he sleeps through the night but moves a lot and only if he’s cuddled. Any suggestions?

My parents allow me to go shopping by myself, go to the cinema by myself, et cetera but they draw the line at letting me go on a walk by myself like they always need a reason for why I’m going out so I was wondering if other parents would have tips on how to try convince them to let me just go and walk by myself

As the title says, I am a 26 year old female finally leaving my parents home. For some background, went to undergrad out of state. But came back home for medical school. Since my parents were only 20min away from my institution, I decided to move back home as I thought it made the most sense (plus I missed my parents dearly).

Now, however, I recently matched into residency 6 hours away in a different state and it’s bittersweet.

Sweet because finally are my dreams coming true. Finally I can mold my life into what I envisioned for myself. I’m moving to my dream city that I feel will influence me to be the best form of myself. I can actually now start living. I have a job, have an income, and can start living.

BUT in the same breath, my parents are my best friend. I genuinely only hang out with them, often turning down invites from friends to do things with them. I miss them when they’re away. I look forward to our lunch and dinner dates. I call my mom at least 3x a day. Any advice or venting session is with them. I never needed anyone else to “talk to” about my problems, because they’re all I need. This won’t be the case anymore. Most days, it’ll just be phonecalls or facetimes. But the dinner dates will be few and far in between, often limited to a weekend or a holiday.

Second, my parents have been seperated for a decade - living in two seperate homes. They co-parent very well. My dad would come by the house everyday to hang out. But with me moving out (living in our childhood home w/ mom), my dad won’t have that need anymore. He has moved on with his life (he doesn’t talk about his dating life, but im sure he has a “lady friend”), has hobbies, increased investment with his job, etc. and at baseline has always been a more hands-off, reserved parent. So I’m not worried about him.

But my mom, she’ll be living in our house all by herself. I’ve slept in the bed with her everyday and now she has to sleep alone. Our weekend rituals and lunch dates will be no more. She has been trying to form an identity outside of being a mother with community service and leadership roles, went back and got her doctorate and is transitioning from clinical medicine to being a professor. But I hope it’s enough to fufill the new void. She’s not dating anyone. She doesn’t have alot of friendships. So I’m just really worried about leaving her. I’m more worried about her than I am of me - bc she has given so much of her life to being a mom and loves it so much. And she’s been taking my move very hard (as we speak, im currently packing and will be moving this weekend). Her health lately hasn’t been the best with her having heart issues, so I also worry for her well-being and me not being there to take her to the hospital if she has a bad day.

I’m not sure what I’m asking for here, but for parents who are empty nesters - are you doing okay?

I can’t live with my parents forever, nor do I want to. But it’s just so painful leaving them for some reason…mainly bc I hope they’ll be okay.

This is not strictly kid related, but is about parent life.

I (38f) am I first time mom to a 1.5 y/o. Before my LO, I got my act together and lost the COVID weight by working with a nutritionist, using online subscription workout videos, and even working with a trainer. In a little less than a year I dropped about 40 lbs and got to my goal weight of 190. Then I got pregnant and did really well til trimester 3, where I suddenly put on a bunch of weight — back up to 240 at my heaviest.

I obviously lost weight having the baby, but the 5 months of leave with no sleep and only convenience style foods put the weight back on. I’m now at 235, and desperate to get back into better shape. Doctor says I need to lose at least 15-25 pounds.

My question is HOW do busy parents find time to exercise in a meaningful way? Of course I play with my LO, she loves to be lifted, carried, etc. we are active on the weekends with hikes and bike rides. But I went from working out 1-2 hours a day, 5 days a week to… nothing.

And my eating habits are not great now either. Busy life means less time to meal plan, grocery shop, prep, and we’ve been eating more convenience or store bought food (not fast food). I make sure that LO eats healthily, but I’ve had more mac and cheese this past year than I care to admit. Also need to find time to cook healthy food again…

I work 7-3, then LO wants to nap or just be on me from 3-5, dinner, bath, trying to get her to bed between 7-8:30, then bed by 9.

Where can I fit it in? What can I do? Desperate for ideas, tips, stories… this mama needs advice.

My husband and I are considering TTC. He’s ex military so we’re both 26 and he’s doing college online while working 20 hrs a week. Our plan would be for him to quit his part time job and be a SAHD for about 8-10 months if we got pregnant quickly. I worry if we are underestimating the challenges of newborn life. Is this a stupid idea? We both have wanted kids for so long as we’ve been married since 2019 but haven’t found the perfect timing.

If we waited till after graduation we’d likely have to wait until after March 2026 to ensure he would get parental leave. Making us 28 almost 29 before baby #1.

(started off as a genuine question but ended up kind of a vent)

I (15F) am the oldest daughter in a family of 5. I have a 11 yo sister and a 4yo brother.

Even tho I'm the oldest, I am the laziest. All I think about is academics(not just school subjects but also extracurriculas and other schools responsibilities). I'm stressed about school or studying about 70% of the time. But that is no excuse to being lazy, like really lazy.

Imagine: I finish eating a bowl of soup and it's the only dish there is to wash. And what am I gonna do? Of course I'm leaving it there.

Or, Saturday, it's cleaning day for my family and I absolutely HATE vacuuming. So I don't vacuum. I make my sister vacuum. I like doing other tasks, like folding clothes or wiping the dust. But do I do these things every Saturday? Of course not. I want to. Trust me, I really do. But I don't know what stops me from doing at least something.

The only reason I am aware of is that I don't like cleaning when someone's at home because then they would say things like "oh, you're actually cleaning" or other stuff and it's not nice. But that shouldn't be an excuse.

Like, my parents work every day and they come home so tired every day. Mom comes home to dirty dishes (sometimes my sister washes them) or other chores and my dad comes home to a dirty house (even tho he doesn't even keep the car or the garage clean, places that are considered "manly").

Can y'all see what kind of bad daughter I am? And school is a huge factor, but during summer break I am still lazy. Yeah, I do practically the cooking and washing dishes and folding clothes nearly every day, but I am still lazy because I don't actually clean the house. Like it doesn't "look" clean even tho there is a 5 yo in the house so there's no way it can look clean.

And I know there are some causes for my laziness, but everyone has their struggles and they still push through. So why should I be excused just because I have a shitty mental health?

My parents often fight because of how "dirty" the house is. The worst period of time is during summer break. And I'm kinda terrified of summer break because of that. And it's the worst because they usually just say my name since I'm the oldest.

Sometimes I don't like my dad. And I feel like I'm close to snapping at him (or at both of my parents) and I know it's not right but his arguments when he fights with my mom are just so dumb I can give better arguments for him. But then I remember how hard he works every day, even tho his back is hurting, just to make money for us.

I am a really shitty person to think like that. And I am even worse because I roll my eyes and act disrespectful whenever mom is mad at me. I can't imagine how much I'm hurting her just by being such a bad daughter.

hiya everyone.

my dad's bday is coming up and i am trying to figure out what to get him, however he has been chronically ill for the past three years with long covid and his life has become very unpredictable and painful for him. it seems that he kind of lost all his joy towards life.

however i still want to get him something nice for his birthday but don't really know what, especially since he stated that birthdays are very depressing for him since he got ill.

last christmas my sister and i got him a photobook of nice experiences we had together and he got very sentimental over it, his family and memories are very precious to him.

overall, he's a simple guy. he likes fishing and beer, repairs computers and every now and then on better days plays world of tanks. that's pretty much all i know he likes.

i don't really wanna get him cozy things that are good for him on the aspect of maybe health related stuff because i think it would make him feel sadder as he doesn't really want to accept the reality that he is suffering, however most other things are also not great because he doesn't know if or whether he can do any of the things he wants to do due to his illness, and most things that relate to the senses are also kinda bad (specific/strong smells make him nauseous, loud noises trigger him, lots of movement in front of his eyes tires him out, etc.)

i genuinely do not know what to do, has anyone got ideas/advice? i would be really grateful for that.