DA SUN IZ PAINTIN' EVERYFING RED. DERE'Z NO GREEN ANYWARE. DIS IZ ZOGGIN' TERRIBUL! I NEED SUM BRAINBOYZ TO HELP KUM UP WIF A SOLUSHUN!

YOU KNOW, IF DA DAKKA IZ TOO FAST, IT JUST TURNZ INTO A "BRRRRRRRRRRRT"... DED-KILLY, BUT FEELZ WRONG.

AND IF YOUZ 'AVE A KANNON, IT JUST GOES "BOOOM" EVERY NOW AN' DEN...

OI REKON, DA OIDEAL IZ IN DA MIDDAH, AT A GOOD "THUMP-THUMP-THUMP-THUMP-THUMP" RATE.

OI FOUND DIS GREAT GIT OF FIAR, SO I TRY TA KURMP 'IM ALL PROPA-LOIK. DA GIT IGNORES DA DAKKA. SO IZ TRY DA CHOPPA, DA GIT DONT KARE! SO IZ RUN BAK TA KAMP AND GET ME BIG DAKKA AND DA GIT STILL DOESNT DIE!

SO IZ FEELIN' KINDA STUPID, MAYBE SOME GITS JUST KANT BE KILLED BY DAKKA? BUT DEN! DEN, IZ GOT DA BIG OIDEA! SO I KALL ALL DA BOYZ FROM KAMP AND TELL 'EM TA BRING ALL DA DAKKA! AND DA GIT STILL DONT DIE!

DAT METAL GIT IS STILL TRY'N TO LOOT ME BUT I HAVE DIS MONTH'S SNACKS AN DRINKS

SNACKS
STABBA MINT SQUIG GUM-3 TEEF
PEPPERMINT SQUIG 2-TEEF
GINGERBRED SQUIG 3-TEEF
GINGERBRED GROT 4 TEEF
PEPPERMINT BARK-3 TEEF
MINCEMEAT GROT PIE-4 TEEF
GROT LIVE-6 TEEF
FUGGY PUDDIN-1 TOOF

DRINKS
SQUIG NOG-3 TEEF
GROT NOG-2 TEEF
Mjod-4 TEEF
SNAKE VEMON 2 TEEF
FESTIVE JET FUEL-2 TEEF
CAN OF OIL-3 TEEF
ELDAR BLOOD-4 TEEF

WOT DO I DO?

NONE BEKOZ I’D RADER BE KRUMPED, THAN BE A UMIE, YA STUPID GIT!! BAHAHAHAHAHAH

OI! I IZ GONNA MAYK DA SNEEKYIST ORKZ!

I've been challenged to make a "stealthy" Kommandos unit by doing some kitbashing. I'm going for comically ridiculous disguises and camouflage but I'm coming to a bit of a block. Other than sticking them in crates and barrels does anyone have any ideas for some very Orkish disguises that I can use for inspiration?

I WAS FOIGHTEN SOME UMIES UND SAW DA FUNNY HAT UMIE GIVIN STICKAS TA OGRYN! WHYZ DON WE GET STICKAS BOSS?! WEREZ OUR STICKAS!?

SUMTIMEZ YOU WANNA KRUMP BUT YOO KANT KRUMP. SUMTIMEZ YOO WANT TO PREETEND WOT IT WOZ LIKE TO KRUMP BAK IN THE OLD DAYZ. SOMETIMES YOO WANNA KRUMP WIV YA BOYZ BUT DEY IZ FAR AWAY.

SO WE MADE A KRUMPIN SIMULASHION. IF YOO WANNA TRY HEAD DIS WAY TO STEEM: https://store.steampowered.com/app/2937090/Hunters_Inc/

IF DA RED WUNZ GO FASTA, DEN DUZ DAT MEEN EF YOUZ PUT RED ON A BULLET IT GOEZ FASTA??? UND IF I PUTZ DA RED ON MESELF IZ I GUNNA GO FASTA????

YESTERDEI I WAS KRUMPIN SUM HUMIES ON SOM GREEN WORLD. ONZE HUMIE SAD, DAT HE IS BLU BLOOD AND ME KILLIN HIM IS FORBIDDN AND AGANZT SUM LAA. DUNNO. WUTEVA, ME KRUMPIN DA BLU BLOOD HUMIE AND ME AXE GET RED.

SO HE IS RED BLOOD, NOT BLU. DIS DOESN'T MEK SENCE. DIS GITTISH, STUPIT HUMIES, DONT KNO WHAT COLOR BLOOD HAFF. BUT WHY SAD HE, HE WUZ BLU BLOOD?

I JUST DUN A BIG OL FINK AN I REKON IF RED MAKEZ ALL DA STUFF GO FASTA DEN IF MY BRANE IS RED DEN ILL FINK FASTA AN BE DA MOST KUNNIN ORK EVA! IF IM DIS KUNNIN NOW IMAGINE HOW GUD IM GONNA BE WEN ME BRANE IZ RED!

A GROT SHOWED ME DIZ 'UMMIE PICKTUR'Z AND DERE EZ DEEZ HUMMIEZ DAT CAN MAKE DERE HAIR STANDZ UPZ AND OTHAH HUMMIEZ DAT LOOKZ LOIK A FREE BOOTAHZ BUT DIZ HUMMIE CAN STRETCH!

ALL ME LOIFE I NE'VAH SEENZ DEEZ HUMMIEZ!? DID DEEZ HUMMIEZ NOT HAVE ENUFF KRUMPEN!? IZ DIZ WHY DEY NOT AROUND ANY MOR?! I WANNA FITE DEEZ HUMMIEZ! WHERE IZ DEY!?

OURZ STRAP SKIES ON DERE WHEELZ AND ROKKITS ON DER RIDES SO DE GO REAL FAST ON TOP DA WATER.

KO NICHI WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH

WHY 'AVEN'T WE BEEN DOIN DIS LADZ??

So as the title says looking to get into the Warhammer 40k scene. I just bought the orks codex.

Looking to build my first 500 point army to start off with. Here is my list:

Big mek w/ kustom-mega blaster, power klaw

War boss w/ kombi-weapon, twin slugga, big choppa

2 sets of 10 Boyz w/ variety of weapons

1 set of 5 Lootas w/ variety of weapons

1 set of 5 Nobs w/ variety of weapons

Mek gunz w/ smasha gun, grat crew w/ smasha gun

let me know how I did for my first build and is there anything I should change. Looking for feed back before I start buying and building.

GORK AND MORK IZ DA BEZT CUZ DEY DA GREENEST OF THE DA GREEN, AND DA MOST ORKY TINGS EVA. DEY RIGHT BRUTAL AND KUNNIN, AND KUNNIN AND BRUTAL. BUT ALL DA UFFA GODZ AIN'T.

DA HUMIE EMPEROR WUZ PRETTY GOOD AND DED ARD AND KILLY, BUT HE GOT LAZY AFTA DAT HORUZ GIT STUCK IM, AND WON'T GET OFF HIS BOSS THRONE NO MORE. ALZO HE'Z LIKE INA LOTA PIEZEZ OR SOME'TING.

DA TYRANID HIVE MIND WOULD BE GOOD, BUT IT'Z MORE INTA EATIN THAN FIGHTIN.

DA TAU ONE AIN'T DON MUCH YET, BUT IT'Z GOT MORE ARMZ DAN A GENELOOTA, SO MAYBE IT'Z GONNA BE FIGHTY? GET DEM BLUE GITZ TO FIGHT UP CLOSE AND PROPPAR FINALLY.

DA PANZEZ MOZTLY GOT KRUMPED BY DAT WIERD CHAOZ GOD, AND DAT'Z JUST EMBERRAZING.

AND DA CHAOZ GODZ, KHORNE IZ SUPPOZZED TO BE ALL DEAD ARD AND FIGHTY, BUT JUST SITZ ALL DA TIME. NURGLE IZ GREEN, BUT HE'Z ALL SMELLY AND WANTZ EVERYONE TO GET ALONG, AND DAT'Z JUZT DUMB. TZEENTCH IS ALWAYZ MAKING EVERYTHING TOO COMPLICATED, WICH IZ DUMB. AND SLANEESH IZ JUST WEIRD IN DA BAD WAY. PLUZ WUZ MADE BY DA SCRAWNY ELDAR PANZIEZ KUZ DEY COULDN'T PROPERLY DIRECT DER IMPULZEZ. NOT LIK UZ ORKZ, WOT KNOW WE FOR FIGHTIN AND WINNIN, KUZ GORK AND MORK IZ DA BEZT!

I’z real light n’ easy to lob, n’ I’z got a proper sharp little choppa, n’ I’z good with Squigs, ‘cept the bigguns

WE'Z TRIED DIS REALLY RED RED DAT A 'UMIE KAME UP WIFF, DATS AS RED AS SUMFIN' REALLY RED. DA TRUKK GOT SO FAST, DA BOYZ KOULDN'T TURN IT, HIT A 'UMIE TANK, AN' FLIPPED IT INTO A 'OLE. FUN TIMEZ. FIGURED IT WOULD BE NICE TA AKTCHUALLY AIM AT DA TANKS NEXT TOIM.

DEY'Z GOT DA SIZE, DEY'Z GOT DA MUSCLE, DEY EVEN LIKE A GOOD SCRAP - BUT DEY LETS DA PUNY UMIE GITS TELL 'EM WOT TA DO!

IT'Z LIKE WATCHIN' A NOB TAKE ORDAZ FROM A GROT! MAKES ME 'EAD HURT JUST FINKIN' ABOUT IT!

I am having trouble fighting you in TW:WH2, tell me the secrets to defeating you and I will give you a stash of rusty metal scraps

OI ERD DAT DA IZ A PLAN-IT ON DA KOZMOZ DAT IZ UN FAT BEEG UUMIE, WERE DEM SPOIKY BOYZ BE KROOZIN ABOUT WIF DA CRABLADZ.

NO IZ' SEEN A LOTT'A PLANTZ WIFF MA WAAGH N' LOOTIN BOATZ AN WATNOT- AN DEYZ USUALLY BIGGA DANN EVEN DA STOMPAZ N' DA ATTAK MOONZ.

DAT UN FAT UUMIE PLANIT IZ UN BIG GROTTY UMAN IF YA KATSH MA DRIFF

IZ'N DAT MEAN DAT IZ DA BIGGEST UMIE AN STRONGA DAN DA EMPRAH-GIT?

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*cough* *sputter* *BUUUURRRRP* SORRY, I ATE A SQUIG AN' IT WANTS OUT! *cough*

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