F*** You narsisstic father for always having to move, working and cheating so you were never around

F*** You narcisstic mother for never raising me and were more focused on bringing as many new men home as possible.

F*** You narcisstic sisters who never cared about me. You were older than me but still didn't have maturity to treat me right.

F*** you kids at school and people in general across my life for excluding me most of my school years so much I never felt I existed and Im a suicidal exhausted overthinking wreck.. I was only nice to everyone else but my experiences with people have made me such a hateful and bitter person that I absolutely hate. This isn't me. I have not one good thing to look back on.

F*** you b*****s for never giving me a chance.

I will always be this insecure absolute train wreck and never do what I wanted.

F*** You god and parents for having to make me experience this hell called Earth.. F*** you god for throwing all the shit you have at me, parents divorce, bullying horrible sisters, narcisstic idiots all around me. Brain that is killing you with overthinking 200 thoughts a second.. Tired of your head, body and can't even go outside anymore because of your hatred for this world. It it too much that something goes right once for 29 years???

Treated by everyone like f***** air... 29 ****** years I've had to make it through the day and absolutely nothing to show for it..

I shouldn't ever have been born

The day I finally delete myself will be the best day of my life

F*** You all. You're all selfish ***holes

I know pity dates are a thing, but what are the odds a girl would sleep with a guy who she feels sorry for. I wonder...

I have always been very internally emotional. I like to feel things. I love to create and consume stories about love and fate. How love can find itself in weird, almost ethereal ways. How fate can bind people and events together in incomprehensible and supernatural ways. Movies like Your Name and Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind really captivate me. I love writing and drawing and obsessing over these ideas. I love to create worlds in my mind where bittersweet endings are real.

I dream of bittersweet love. Of true connection and the threads of fate which binds us. I dream of meeting that person who you realize you aren’t complete without. I dream of falling in love with the girl next door, who you grew up with. Someone who you come to realize you care a lot for. A platonic friendship turned true love.

The irony is that in reality it's simply not my story. I can’t communicate with people. I’m weird and unattractive. I can barely even make friends, let alone ever finding true love. I feel barely human. I don't see why anyone would like me and thus have lost the motivation to search for people, to form real connections. So I have come to the conclusion that no one could ever see who I truly am. I have no one to talk to. I will never find love. All I have are these fantasies which only serve to make real life depressing in comparison. Am I destined to live out the rest of my life a captive of of my own fiction? It's like a curse. I just wish I could wake up in another world where people are as loving and wholesome as in the stories I love so much.

Nearly all of my friends, online and irl, are in relationships and the ones that aren't have at least been in one before.

Sometimes I feel like i'm not really getting anywhere by venting to other FA people, so i've tried venting to these friends of mine instead... then I remember why I avoid doing that in the first place.

Now that I've tried basically all their advice (dress better, 'shower' (something i've done since I was born), go to the gym, socialise more, 'put myself oht there', etc.), they've realised that that isn't the problem, but they refuse to believe that it's my height and face thags the problem, so now instead of regurgitating the same advice, i'll get as follows;

"You don't NEED to be in a relationship to be happy!"

"You'll find 'the one' one day!"

"(insert unsolicited paragraph talking about their own relationship for no reason here)"

"personality is what really matters! you're funny/polite/whatever the hell, you'll find someone one day!"

"you don't know for sure that nobody finds you attractive!"

Basically just this, and some variations of it. I'm not gonna write out my grievances with all of these statements, since i'm sure you guys may have heard similar, but it just reminds me how my friends, though they mean well, just don't get it.

They don't get it and they never will. They'll never understand what it's like to be a unattractive guy. I'm reserved irl, but generally, people do like me and if they don't it's just because I'm socially awkward, and as we all know, anyone who isn't the status quo is horrible for... reasons.

I just don't understand why my friends think looks don't matter, they do. They always will. And that concludes my rambling on why I'll just stick to venting about my issues to people with similar issues to my own rather that those who seem to have it almost all figured out :)

I went speed dating and right before it even started girls went up to the best looking guy and said "Hey sit with me first" that was depressing as hell.
Another time I remember a really cute blonde girl and I remember I made her laugh a bunch of times and thought I had made pretty witty conversation, the bell rang and she sat with the next guy a manbun wearing hipster. All he had to say was "I talked to my mom on the phone yesterday" and that same girls started laughing "omg you're hilarious!" I was devastated, after the event she walked home with him. I remembered thinking it doesn't matter what I say or even dress like, it's impossible unless you're gifted in the looks department.

I got many more but for the sake of my sanity I'll stop here. Your turn

What i read most on here is that people struggle because of their looks or other underlying problems like autism. But are here also people like me who were too afraid of intimacy and sex for years so they self sabotaged etc? I cant be the only one...

After all efforts of improving looks, reading books to improve yourself, working on your career, hobbies, and so on, you realize that dating and love isn’t for you, when you have a friend who does none of that and attracts women with zero effort.

All of the effort I’ve put into the listed things, have yielded me zero results. It’s pretty eye opening when you realize how warm and flirty women are to men that they actually like. To be honest, it seems like you either have it or you don’t, and there’s little to nothing that can be done

Would you rather:

1. Live to 100 years old, but remain forever alone and a virgin

OR

1. Find true love , but die before the age of 40

This question is for everyone—men, women, and all genders. What’s your choice and why?

And every new year, I have no one. I have friends, work friends, school friends, etc. That doesn't satisfy lack of romantic connection. All the friends I have are superficial. I don't have someone emotionally close to me to be there for me and support me and grow with me :'(

Idk whats wrong with me, i can hold a conversation but most of the time I just get this urge to not show interest in that other person or to just ignore them or act like they don't exist when all I want is the opposite. In 10th grade I even got the girl I wanted but I sent her away when she can to talk to me and didn't talk to her for rest of the year. Same happened twice now in university this year. Sometimes all I want is to travel alone in nature and become a full time Alpinist and painter

Besides cuddling and sex and eating together? What do you even do? I’m pretty boring and reserved and depression has sucked the energy and the personality out of me so I’m just a fucking shell who wants to be held!!!!!!

I’m a nervous wreck. I can’t have any conversation with a woman beyond small talk. I’ve just never clicked with anyone, and they usually have no interest in talking to me. I’m so weak and soft. If you’ve ever seen the original Superman movie, I’m basically Clark Kent, the difference is that pathetic weak person is ALL I am, I can’t rip my clothes off and become a better person. I just wish I was super confident and funny. I wish I could craft a string of jokes out of thin air. I wish I was the type of person that a girl would be excited to talk to.

I am a 23M turning 24 after exactly a week and don't even have anyone to hang out with and Idk why. Yesterday I again spent my Saturday alone. At first I asked a male friend to hang out with me in this Brazilian restaurant of our city but he said that he had other plans. I even asked this girl(20F) to hang out with me too whom I have been knowing for about a year and chatting on Instagram often and was in the same school as me too at some point. But she replied "No I am not free". So I went to the restaurant alone and again went to this luxurious mall of our city Bangalore in India where I talked with 2 expat women. One is from US and another from France but both the conversations were brief. The conversation with the French woman happened in the bar area of this restaurant where she was sitting and she responded warmly to me but she politely said that she has something very important to hear in her phone showing her earphones so she can't really have a conversation at the moment but we still had a handshake and we said each other nice to meet you. We couldn't connect further on social media but both the conversations boosted my confidence and made me feel less lonely.

But suddenly today I saw in my Instagram how many of my peers and followers especially from my University where I study MBA were having a more fun weekend by going for a concert and they hanged out as groups of guys and girls something which I never did. Even my male friends barely wants to ever hang out with me. Even after having conversation with the foreign expat women, I am still feeling FOMO seeing Instagram maybe because the conversations were one time and we didn't connect further so it was less socially fulfilling than my other friends who hang out with each other or when couples hang out. I am talking with several girls and even asked 3 girls from my MBA to hang out with me a couple of weeks ago. But 1st girl(24F) said she has assignment to complete, 2nd girl(22F) said she has class soon so she has to eat fast and 3rd girl(23F) said she has class soon too and her friends are waiting for lunch. It seems like whenever I ask someone to hang out with me even just as friends, they are always busy so forget about a date or a girlfriend. It seems like everyone has someone to hang out with whether friends or a partner and somehow I am the only loner every time when I go out.

I won’t say the name of the website, I’m not trying to advertise or anything.

It’s basically like there’s a catalog of “e-girls” with a picture(either them or anime girl) and a voice clip. They have like games you can choose from, then play with them for money.

I’ve struggled with findom a lot in the past, wasting an obscene amount of money on it. With help from therapy I’ve spent way less over the past few months and I feel a lot better about it.

But now I’ve found this online service and it’s kinda getting me again. The thing is though, it’s less degrading, it’s 99% sfw, it gives me connection which is what I sook out from findom, it’s infinitely cheaper, but it’s still like I’m paying a girl for attention, which really feels bad.

I don’t know what to think about it all. I’m 23 and I’ve never had a girlfriend, kiss, held hands, hug, or anything, so I feel like I’m kinda susceptible to this kinda trap. I’m not a very attractive guy and I’m really shy and awkward so girls don’t seem to wanna talk to me and honestly I totally understand why. It’s just nice when I pay to talk to a girl and she, even if it is totally fake, is nice, flirty, and seems to want to talk to me.

I’m just very torn. I don’t know what to do or if I should even worry or what. I just know I feel like a piece of shit for doing it but I also feel alive when I do it. Any advice or thoughts?

Walked past a guy with three girls in tow, with two of them holding either hand and the last with her arms wrapped around his waist.

After witnessing that scene, I felt as though I was a Martian born on the wrong planet.

I met this girl half a year ago and since them i just felt like my life went to shit bite by bite

story is quite exhaustive and i feel like i should include everything.

wasn't really the most social type before, but started realizing over the last few months in how far that has been damaging to my psyche. at least i had a kinda friendgroup of like 7 allright and of those 2 a bit mroe closer friends within my local scouts group, which has consisted like this for over 6 years. on a regional camp activity around whitsun (national holiday) we met with other scouts and they were one part of one of the groups we talked more to (like, hungout around the campfire outside of activities). i tried to shoot my shot as we could kinda connect over a international scout meeting we both attented a year earlier (which was 40000 people large so we didn't meet). i got her number, not more, and added all of their group and all of my 7 people into one group.
as it was a regional meeting, the other group lived 180km far away and as she didn't really remain contact after the weekend i as usually accepted that my shot as usually missed and maybe we could remeet the group in a year or at the next regional camping activity. after a month or so i got to know she got together with one of the two a bit closer guys of my group. i was envious about that a bit, as that guy is the one who gets the ladies. he's the one with the charisma who can connect to people, I am more like a brain on stilts (for ease, i will refer to him as friend1 f1 and his girlfriend as g1).

fast forward, it's the double-birthday of the two closer-to-me guys of the group (they have birthday like 3 days apart) and understandably his girlfriend is also there. i mostly ignored him and her for all of the evening as i was invited to the other half of the birthday (side story: i was removed by f1 from the shared birthday group, nonconsensual with anyone, but i could make sense of that only later. other guy told me to come nevertheless). as the evening went on, i was taken aside by two friends of f1. i was lit a bit, and strongly insisted i called g1 a bitch and that "multiple people wanted me to leave". i didn't call anyone a bitch, but i am socially insecure enough and at that moment drunk enough to be gaslit into thinking that i really was unwelcome at the party. as i was leaving, the guy who invited me held be back and told me to stay, as he was mindful enough to realize my predicament and sat me inside with a glass of water (with which he was a bit late with, i already downed like another beer and 2 shots to finish up and cope with the gaslit rejection). I left like 15 minutes later and got myself driven home. the evening later i talked to a trusted person about it and had a breakdown realizing what happened and how deep my issues go (already started therapy about it bit before that party). in that talk, i also reasoned that either f1 or g1 asked the two guys to gaslight me into leaving the party as they probably didn't want me there.

situation-side-story: over the time skipped between the two paragraphs there was some irregular texting in the group, over which i realized a passive agression or hostility build up towards me. i worked out over the last few months much of the regular rejection i experience could stem from my, which i actually don't like to bring up, above-average inteligence. i play it down and overgo it mostly bc i know it would be rude to constantly correct and fact-spit whenever something slightly inaccurate is said and would likely not improve my social perception. my social tendency was always towards hanging with people 1-2 years older than me, which combined with my above-averageness had me skip a year in school and reinforced me hanging with older people. i still was a top-grader, and me being a year younger and still excelling at school put me in the position of a geek/nerd which i sadyl didn't do anything against up until the few months ago or so mentioned at the beginning (when i started looking into why i was feeling miserable more and more).
so, the hostility building up towards expressed in regular jokes about my social situation (as most in the group got to know i don't have no romance or any other friends in my life), mostly initiated by g1. i always shrug such jokes off, as i don't want to be the nerd and the sensitive guy, though such stuff cuts deep and i am the nerd and the sensitive guy. i know it is a low jab, but i think g1 probably dislikes me that much because of my inteligence. she dropped out of highschool and started an apprenticeship (which is fully possible to achieve financial succes in my country, but somehow seen as inferior to studying), but she openly told that she did not do that because she wanted to, but because she would not have been able to finish highschool. i don't have anything to show but my inteligence, and i can literally not think of anything that could make me seem of so much of a bad person to justify her hostility towards me than her being envious of my inteligence, so she takes the low jab of making fun of my social incapabilities and fucking over my already ludicrously puny social life.

so, today i got pictures/stories/shared location indicating and confirming that all of the group had met up at the place 180km away, communicating explicitly without using the group shared with me. on first suspicion, with dm to one of the people from my group i asked, literally: "Do you actually still need the old group or do you have a new one?" as i was ghosted, i requested to be at least not left on read, which was answered with a change of the shared group profile picture to one without me and sharing of group- and activity pictures in that group. my dm was not answered. as i was later confirmed on my suspicion, i followed with literally: "you gotta tell me that you don't want me with you. because i find only changing the group picture and externally discussing, but using the group to show me how you are having fun without me very shitty. be be consequent at least and tell me that you don't want me to participate so i can say my goodbyes".

this confirmed to me that g1 probably strongly dislikes me and everybody else liked her more than me and was okay with quietly excluding me.
conclusion; after being rejected (which i do find completely sensible, looking at me), g1 continiously insulted me, fucked my social life and self-perception and now also stripped away my yearlong only reliable friend group. i know it's wrong to hate single persons and pin all your problems on them, but i feel like g1 of all the people i ever met except myself fucked my life the most. i do not regret any day more than the one i asked for her number and got it.

tl;dr: i met someone who pushed me out of my yearlong friendgroup, while also instulting me and fucking over my self perception

oh man having this written out feels better than before. thanks in advance to all the brave readers.

I'm just tired, I've gone on like 7 first dates since September, zero second dates, I just want to know what I'm doing wrong.

Earlier I got coffee and went book shopping with a girl from hinge that I matched with on 2 apps, she was super quiet and got an "emergency" text ten minutes into book shopping.

I'm not mad I'm unlovable, I'm mad I don't know what it is that makes me that way. I know I'm a niche (built like a sun bear) but I just want to know what I'm doing wrong, and what makes me not enough for anyone ever. I'm a sophomore in college and I'm tired of trying.

I just want to feel normal.

I don't blame her, or any of them, I just wish they told me what I need to fix before I tried again. I'm sick of "yeah I'll text you!" when we both know damn well I'm never hearing from them again. I dont yearn for sex, just feeling human.

https://i.redd.it/u3jrfn1ikw6e1.gif

I've just watched it, and it's really impressive how much I could relate to Joe.

I don't know how or even if it was intentional, but Villeneuve really understood what FA men go through and managed to display it perfectly in the movie.

For those who haven't watched it I highly recommend it.

i basically live in 2 diff. states. one in the midwest, another thats near the mountains. my house there is in an HOA in a community of about 1200 people. a few others in the subdivision have friended me online. sometimes i share meme's to the town page as well and we all exchange innocent likes or comments.

i always had the gut feeling that instead of dating apps, id meet someone through every-day type of stuff in town. i still think its gonna happen that way but im wondering what you would suggest i do. im also talking about meeting other dude friends and in general not being FA anymore. i am actually blessed in the looks department. i am objectively handsome.

now it seems you cant just come right out and announce on a town FB page "hey i am alone and want to get 5 people together to play frogger across the road in town" or whatever. i know i will come off as pathetic then.

so im trying to think of ways other homeowners here, maybe 30s and 40s men and women could run in to one another. yes im mostly concerned about dating but i usually get banend from dating type of subs.

Being forever alone has affected me the most this year out of any other years.

After going past mid 20s it feels like everything is too late now.

My life isn't a mess yet people with worse lives than me can find a partner.

Im losing any meaning, motivation or even purpose in my life.

Going to public events or in public in general drives me insane because i like being around people and in fresh air but every time i see a happy couple i feel like crying. I literally tear up in public.

Listen to a song, becoming harder since they're all mostly about girls one eay or another.

Watching series or movies, also becoming harder because there is some sort of romance sometimes and i always feel a hole in my chest when those scenes come on.

Everyday after work i break down from feeling lonely, weeekends aren't much better. I still get no or minimal results from apps or anything else i try.

Im scared i might not have the will to live in the future. Sorry for the rant. I know i shouldn't rant and keep taking actions but my will power is fading.

Don’t bother trying

Or I wouldn't be alive and kicking for 36 years without it. Anyone who says "my partner isn't meeting my sexual needs" is false.

I'm 29 now, definitely not young anymore.

I can still say that I'm a bit too young to take a managerial position within my company, I can still say that I'm too young to be teaching philosophy, I can still say that I'm too young to be a renowned professor at a top university.. but I can no longer use being young as an explanation for why I still haven't slept with a single woman. Not when everyone my age (except two friends) that I know have done the deed long ago.

Anyway, I say 25-27 is when you are no longer young in virgin terms. 40 is when you can be called an old virgin because at that age you could meet people who are both 10 years younger than you and 10 years more sexually experienced than you.

The only people who I used to consider mine are my parents, my sis, my bestfriend. But there will always be some things hidden from parents, and which they will be toxic with. So I can't say them my people. Next is sister....where do I even start but let's just say if she had to leave me cause her bf would tell, she would. Thats how unimportant I am for her. Next comes bestfriend (who is sister bf too), how do I call him frnd after he influenced my sister to block me ....and I have no one who can understand me. No one really cares about me. And I feel like there is no person in world whom I can understand mine and not feel alone. Romantically I am almost 21 but never even had long conversation with any guys. Will I stay alone always? Can a person live happily ehile alone? Rn I am not able to. I constantly sometimes cry on this topic.

How many wrong turns did you take?

Seriously, when was the pointof no return?

For me, I came from minority religion (new age) in a Christian neighbourhood, so I was ostracised in school up until high school when decided to pretend as a christian to fit in. However, at home, my parents seem to be weirdos, and kids around were told not to associate with "us".

Other than sports, I have very little in common with the normal population, very little beliefs.

If at all,l I have lead a normal life to survive, I would have to fake everything, no real conviction, no deep emotions.

I feel I am heading in this direction.

I dont know if its just me but every time I meet someone new, I feel like I get typecast as the nice friend whose always there to listen but never the one anyone looks at romantically

I recently got out of a relationshop and it just made me feel even more like Im destined to always be backup option. Its so hard not to feel like im the problem you know?

Does anyone else feel this way