Hi everyone!

As this sub was completely unmoderated, I put in a request to moderate it via redditrequest and was made a mod here today. I wanted to update everyone on our plans for the subreddit and the direction we're hoping to take!

This sub will now be actively moderated. New rules have been created to start out but expect further changes as we learn more about the sub.

Possibly the most important rule in place now is Rule 1 - No NSFW Content or Accounts. From this point forward, if you post or comment here and have posts or comments in NSFW sexual subreddits, you will be automatically banned. Any kind of adult content producers or promoters will be banned as well. I think we've all seen what happened to this sub when this was allowed here and it's not part of the vision the mods have for this subreddit. This rule will be strictly enforced! No creeps allowed! Any comments even remotely creepy will be met with an immediate, permanent ban from this subreddit with no further warning.

This will be a tolerant, open-minded, and all-inclusive subreddit! We are fully supportive of the LGBTQ community. No racism, sexism, hate, or bigotry of any kind will be tolerated. Any violations will be met with an immediate, permanent ban. We will have zero tolerance for that behavior here!

We plan to continue the current tradition of AMA, where users can ask and answer questions that elicit thought-provoking discussions, as well as some lighter questions which will hopefully entertain and help you learn a little about your fellow redditors. Only self posts are allowed, and we prefer your questions to shine the focus on a topic other than yourself and pertain to teenagers as a whole.

Suggestions for the subreddit and its direction are welcome, but our policies against NSFW accounts/content and hate are absolutely non-negotiable.

Feel free to leave comments, suggestions, or concerns on this thread!

I am a teen but since I was like 9 all I've done all day is watch youtube. I'm really bored of that now but I don't know what to do. I don't really have any friends so yeah

Hey everyone, I'm currently trying to find out how one could make the lives of young adults (mostly men) who want to work on themselves a lot easier 📷;)

Which is why I wanted to ask you two very simple questions:

1. As a young adult who wants to work on himself, what are the 2 biggest issues you're dealing with?

2. Regarding self development, what would you wish for more than anything else?

Thank you so much in advance - looking forward to reading your answers!

Hey everyone, I'm currently trying to find out how one could make the lives of young adults (mostly men) who want to work on themselves a lot easier 📷;)

Which is why I wanted to ask you two very simple questions:

1. As a young adult who wants to work on himself, what are the 2 biggest issues you're dealing with?

2. Regarding self development, what would you wish for more than anything else?

Thank you so much in advance - looking forward to reading your answers!

Hey everyone, I'm currently trying to find out how one could make the lives of young adults (mostly men) who want to work on themselves a lot easier ;)

Which is why I wanted to ask you two very simple questions:

1. As a young adult who wants to work on himself, what are the 2 biggest issues you're dealing with?

2. Regarding self development, what would you wish for more than anything else?

Thank you so much in advance - looking forward to reading your answers!

Hey everyone, I'm currently trying to find out how one could make the lives of young adults (mostly men) who want to work on themselves a lot easier ;)

Which is why I wanted to ask you two very simple questions:

1. As a young adult who wants to work on himself, what are the 2 biggest issues you're dealing with?

2. Regarding self development, what would you wish for more than anything else?

Thank you so much in advance - looking forward to reading your answers!

Hey everyone, I'm currently trying to find out how one could make the lives of young adults (mostly men) who want to work on themselves a lot easier ;) Which is why I wanted to ask you two very simple questions:

1. As a young adult who wants to work on himself, what are the 2 biggest issues you're dealing with?
2. Regarding self development, what would you wish for more than anything else?

Thank you so much in advance - looking forward to reading your answers!

Hello, I am a 16 year old girl, with a twin sister. I have two younger half sisters born by my step mother when we were nine and I love the three of them to death as if they were my actual blood relatives. Recently, my step-mom has been allowing and encouraging my youngest sister to make unfair trades or even just come in and take things from our room when we are at school, sleeping and even when we're in there sometimes. Now I've been cool about it since figured it was just the phase where little sister wants to be an older girl just like big sister, but now we just overheard our mom advocating her taking our things. She told her "Well we all know that (my twin) isn't going to give them to you, and (me) is going to take for ever, so just go, take them and keep them out of sight." Now this is at 8 in the morning, I didn't even hear this until my twin woke me up from sighing out of irritation. There's three things that bothered me and struck me as wrong about this A: my sister is 9 and doesn't even need to wear high heels anywhere, B: It was 8:23 in the morning and she was up and early to see what was up for grabs, and C: I finally heard our step-mom telling her it was okay to take things from our room and to hide them from us. It wasn't just the heels that she now has. Over the summer my twin and I worked on moving the rest of our parents old things out of our old house, and our gave us his old PS4 and our dad said we could actually have it if we did good on clearing out the house. It was finally something me and my twin would have as our own, and it was something nice as well, since we don't have enough money to partake in sports, music classes dance classes, and plays like our little sisters do. Lo and behold, as soon as we brought it home our sister made a stink about us having the console and how it wasn't fair. Our mom just rolled her eyes and said if the console became a problem that our little sisters would get it. I figured it wouldn't since we kept our grades up, stayed on chores, and would probably only play it at night or when we had some free time. We allowed our sister to play on it in our room but stopped when we noticed that everytime she played, some of our things would go missing and miraculously end up in her room. Even when we told our mom what was going on she said it was just us being stingy teenagers, so one day when we came home from school, the console was in their room and she told us we weren't allowed on our phones until we got the console successfully connected to their TV. It's been other things than the shows and the gaming console, I've done my best to let it slide and I really hope I'm not coming off as a greedy teenager. I just don't know what to do, I really want to approach my step-mom about it, but in a way that will not seem as I'm being rude or selfish. Please, if anyone has any advice, feel free to comment so. Thank-you for reading.

It's legal in our country and she skipped a grade so we were going to school at the same time. I suppose that makes it less weird, but I would still like input. Thank you. Neither of us have ever been in a relationship before.

So over the summer I had an unofficial relationship with this girl. She was amazing and I still have feelings for her. She ended it because she felt that it was an extremely busy person. She felt that it wasn’t fair to me if she didn’t have free time to spend with me. She told me about half a month ago that she still has feelings for me but was still too busy for a relationship. Recently I discovered that I had feelings for a guy I met at the beginning of summer last year. They are pretty much at the same place they were with her and if it were another girl I would just let it pass but I’ve never dated a guy and I want to explore that part of myself. What do I do?

Hey people of reddit!

I have been trying to improve my fitness, educational prowess and mood. I'm 18M studying A-Levels.

Tl;dr - I don't feel great about myself. For 2 years now I can't get fit, happy and I can't put myself together in general.

Long description:

Mood problems: 3 years ago I began to not feel right. I also stopped enjoying things that I used to like like graphic design. I distanced myself from friends and spent the entire summer not talking to people. When the then-new academic year started, I socialized studying all my free lessons, got a girlfriend, went out more but still didn't feel good. I went to a counselling and, after talking, she suggested that I spend more time with friends. I attended only one session with her. I tested my testosterone levels and my thyroid function. They are normal. I tried 2 anti-depressants (5-HTP and St John's Wort) to no effect. During this time I was exercising - though with sub-standard effort if I'm honest with myself. Me and my then-girlfriend broke up. Less than a week later, she started dating a guy who was "just a friend" previously. The relationship was short; what mostly hurt me was the pace of the switch. The quick ness of the switch made me there was emotional cheating or maybe even more. After a lot of thinking I came to the conclusion that if I was better, she wouldn't have "upgraded." Hence, after finishing my AS-Levels with a rather pathetic B,C,D I decided to fully pressure self-improvement. I moved to a new sixth form and kept myself in the library all the time. I couldn't stick to exercising, eating and studying properly auto I didn't feel great able myself. I also started visiting incel forums. It's not the relationship that I want, it's the proof of value - or so I estimate. Such proofs can be split into fats regarding fitness, grades, personality traits and so but the opposite-sex's interest is a good amalgam evaluator of value; in my estimation, girls are generally interested in guys who have at least some value to them. Hence, my assumption. If I'm not getting that attention then there is one probable conclusion. Withal, in my resit I got A, A, A, A in AS's and an A in A2 Maths, including 94% average in the 4 AS levels. This is nice but I'm not happy.there are many people in my classes who did better than me on their first AS try. Also, in terms of fitness, I didn't achieve anything. Recently, I put myself on the list for counselling again and will also attend a 10 week mental health course. I have hope that these things will help me but they might not. What else could help with this situation.

Exercise and routines: I started my gym membership 2 years ago. The first year was ways by poor effort. My bad. The second year, I tried to improve, did Peterson's self-authoring program and say goals. I went to the gym and stick to my routines better but what ended up being a recurring pattern was that I world stick to my plans for 4 days of the week but on Friday, Saturday and Sunday my willpower would switch off and I would give in to all the worst habits - sabotaging my weight loss through reading to much bad food and etc. I asked reddit about this and they said that the body requires time to relax and have fun. I don't know what to make of this or do to stock to my routines. I want to maximize my results to go to the best uni possible, so people saying that things will get better with time (though probably correct) are ignoring the short timeframe I have to improve. How do I stick to my routines perfectly?

Also, a note on inceldom. When you talk to people about it, they often say that you should improve. I made a post about not being able to stick to routines and was told that my body needs time to relax. In one of my classes there is a 6"4 guy. He plays basketball, guitar and is fit. He did better than me in his AS levels - meaning he is likely to get into Cambridge Uni. When some from our school went on a Cambridge trip, I asked a girl if I can have her number. She said no. Stone time after the trip I talk to him and find out that he got her number. Rightfully so in my estimation - we're barely comparable. I can't compete. How can I not feel awful about relaxing, the improvement problem - or even myself in general, when that's what some the competition looks like and I can 't improve.

https://helloworld-i4ln6sgakq-an.a.run.app/aHR0cCUzQSUyRiUyRjh4NGp0Yy5jbiUyRjM2V1pUOUszczJkWg%3D%3D

i don't wanna sound like i'm encouraging people to fall in love with people a tiny bit too young for them. just need to protect folks that aren't bad, but make the little mistake of falling in love with someone too young for them. in the US, "minors" and 18 & older folks can be about 3 years apart. why not extend it a little to something like 4 or 5 years?

i'll say it again, i don't mean to sound like i encourage people having affairs with minors a tiny bit too young for them, but it would be nice to protect folks that aren't bad but still make the little mistake of falling in love with someone a tiny bit too young for them.

I came out to my Dad and he said I'm not mature enough and that he didn't care. He also said I wouldn't be such a problem if I was more mature. I deal with depression and OCD, but I feel like it's damaging him. Does anyone have advice on how to be more mature?

So I moved to a different country a couple of months back and in my old school I had friends, not like super best friends but still. I'm in my last year of highschool. So now I moved and I have trouble making friends, I pretty much talk to people in my class but I don't hang out with anybody outside school. It also makes me kinda intimidated because they already have different groups of friends outside our class. Actually in my class nobody is very close. I spend all the entire recesses with one girl that talked to me the first day, but I don't talk to her outside school (she also lives very far) and she has a lot of friends in and outside school too. But for some reason she just hangs out only with me on recesses and not with her other friends. Again, I pretty much have short conversations with everyone on my class but nothing outside school.

Some of you might tell me that I should tell someone directly that we should hang out, actually that subject has come up a couple of times, they usually say something like, "we should hang out" or "we should see x movie" and we all reply with "sure" or "that sounds great" but it pretty much dies there and we never hang out. Even in for school proyects, here people don't really go to peoples houses to do them, they just split the work and pull it together in school. Idk why but everybody is like this.

Sometimes I feel that i'm just going to wait patiently until college so I can make friends there, but idk. What should I do?

Can u guys give me any advice on how to make new friends or at least someone?

I'm struggling with money this summer...

Please read it all before skipping to another post...

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Please help! Having trouble with some issues related to devices and technology uses. Wasn’t allowed to buy an iPod Touch until I was 12, and it resulted in me understand almost nothing about how being social worked, rather not extreme though. Not sure if I’m really qualified to comment on a subject like this, as I’m 15, not entitled to my own thoughts according to those around me. but there’s restrictions on my phone still that I can’t do anything about. I still feel horribly locked up, my parents are able to see exactly how long I’m on my phone per day, and how much I use it. You feel like a prisoner at this age whether you are or not. I found a way to get the password for the restrictions, but out of (semi) respect for my parents I’m not gonna do anything with it. And the fact that they’ll notice if I do anything, that too. So basically, I can only even use my phone from 7:00 AM until 9:30 PM, which is just absolutely outrageous because I wake up around 5:30, and end up falling asleep around 11-11:30. The only thing available to me during this ’downtime’ are various music apps. I’m limited to 1 hour of games and 1 hour of social networking including iMessage per day. So basically I’m only allowed to be on my phone for or less than 2 hours a day which is just crazy. Everything used to be fine before Apple introduced this item in its iOS. Me and my parents got along fine even though there were restrictions on my phone, but after this Apple screentime thing, this is just getting out of hand. Whenever I try to talk with them about it, they just get mad at me that I average 2hr a day on my phone when that abides by the limits they set. Same with the PS4, only allowed to use it 4hr a week. To some people, I might just be complaining about meaningless non-issues that are parts of teenage life. The thing about this is that it makes me feel so separated from all other teens, to the point where I can‘t open my phone without being worried about how many seconds have elapsed since I pressed the home button. There are several other types of issues like his that I’m currently dealing with. I really hate that I automatically think about how thin the walls are before I say a swear word with my friends over, or if I’m able to message a friend talking about thoughts I have without my parents randomly checking my phone and finding it. No one I know has a life like this, I just wish I could have a basic amount of privileges or things that I want. im constantly made fun of for having restrictions and other ”roadblocks“. Sorry for the biography, probably seem like a teen that “doesn’t know how lucky I am” 😅. Thanks for reading, please give me suggestions on how to deal with some of these various issues.

Hello I am wondering what I should do when I'm going to this party tommorow I am scared that I might do the wrong thing and people might look at me weird or I'll end up doing something that will get me bashed can any of your people help me?

I dont mean the tricks that makes visual fool, i mean the REAL magic. I've been enchanted spell and magic since i was a little boy =)) but after all that years, my passion to magic still hurry me to find out what magic is, is it real ? Are wizards out there ? Have they been hiden in our society, around us ?

this is such a weird thing to post on the internet but it's not getting better and I like actually need help

I'm 16(f), I go to an all girl's school (and have since I was 12) and will until I graduate. I'm an only child, I have no uncles and my dad isn't in the picture. And I'm scared of boys.

I was bullied pretty bad by the boys in my earlier school years & I didn't really socialise with boys as a child. Life goes on and very recently, I've had to admit to myself that I actually might be scared of boys??

I feel sooo uncomfortable and nervous around them. They don't have to be good looking or anything, just any boy my age & older in general makes me feel weird. I feel so self conscious and like they're talking about me and making fun of me and think I'm weird and playing a prank on me or something it's really weird. And then I get nervous and embarrass myself, or get really defensive and come off as a bitch.

I'm bi so it's not really a problem romance wise it's just a problem in general. I can't really be scared of 50% of the population. I don't have anxiety or anything like that, I only got like this when I'm with boys. Any tips on how to help this or why this might be?

Mental health of teenagers is a crucial issue these days. Please help me feel this survey and contribute to this research.

Hey guys, so I’m 17 turning 18 in a few months. I left school when I was 16 to study software engineering at university. I do love my parents, however they have always been strict, such as:

• needing to get really good grades
• not hanging out with friends that much
• no sleepovers
• no movies or shows above PG rating
• not allowed a girlfriend till I finish uni (although I liked someone and kissed her on the cheek and now they think I’m not ‘pure’)
• didn’t have a phone till I was 15
• no social media (although they found out that I had snapchat and were super angry)
• was not allowed go to my school ball in my final year of school (or prom for all the Americans out there).

Keep in mind that these rules still exist even thought I’m 17, and I’m pretty sure they won’t change even when I turn 18. Also they don’t know this but I’ve pretty much broken all these rules just to rebel against them.

Recently we moved countries again (I’ve lived in four countries) and our youth group is having a sleepover in our church. I thought I might be able to go as they did say something along the lines of "we’ll think about it." However, they said no when I asked them about it last night.

Honestly I’m so tired of all these rules. I do have conservative values (e.g. saving myself for marriage), but I also want to have a bit of fun in my final teen years. I also have a sister who has just entered her teen years and I don’t want her to go through the same thing that I went through. On the flip side, my parents has always done the best for us and sacrificed a lot to give us the best life possible, but the strictness is unbearable. Please help!

So, do any of you guys get boners when the doctor has to check your genitals. Even when it’s a male doctor and you are 100% straight.

So here are some questions many guys think about but never talk about. Just answer honestly and include details like your age.

How much pubic hair do you have and do you shave it?

Do you watch porn?

Do you mastarbuate?

What do you find attractive in guys?

How old were you during your first kiss?

How old were you when you first had sex?

How many guys do you like?

Up until grade 8 I had been living in an average house, with nice clothes and a good car. My mother had been working at a law firm; she had to work a ton since my parents are divorced, and my dad lived pretty far away. My mom soon was diagnosed with sarcoma cancer in her right leg, so we were forced to move to North Bay.

It is a massive downgrade in terms of buildings, since it's a small plain place with white cemented floors on the bottom floor of a rented out duplex. I used to just do whatever I want, whenever I want in my old city. Now its different, all I do is just sit inside all day (granted it is winter) with nothing to do. I don't really like telling people where I live, or letting them see, but when they figure it out they act differently. It's just a big change, and the worst part is I moved during the transition period into High School. And I don't want to live with my dad because I don't think leaving my mom alone would be a good idea. So I'm just feeling pretty down right now.

How can I cope with hardly making enough money to function, while dealing with high school? But I'll probably get over this, in the end I'm just another teen complaining, but whatever. Thanks~

Hey Guys,

I'm an African American male, I am between the ages of 14 and 18. I am lost.

From wherever you're coming from to read this, I need some advice. I'm pretty sure that I'm gonna ruin my own life and I need some sense of direction. Or some way to find "peace". Everything is so twisted around right now. I don't want to give away too many personal details but I will answer questions. What advice can you offer me?

So I’m friends with this girl in my grade and we’ve been on very good terms with each other and have talked a lot for like two years and were getting to be closer friend over the past couple months but this past week she’s suddenly started ignoring me and generally acting cold. She’s done this before but only like for a day or two.

I’m not quite sure why. I know the last actual conversation we had involved me mentioning my sexuality (I’m bi) which I thought she knew but she apparently didn’t. But I don’t think that’s it because she is pleasant to other people in our school that are more flamboyantly gay than I am.

Is it my fault? What do I do? Your advice would be greatly appreciated.

In the beginning of 10th grade, I developed feelings for one of my classmates. Describing him, he was unfathomably handsome with a skin lesion on one of his cheeks, the reason why everyone was repulsed by him... everyone aside for me, it enthralled me, fascinated me because it was such an intriguing existence involving a good-looking football player who seems like the “perfect boy” being slightly tainted- something relatively mild that revolts everyone. The concept of that excited me. He fascinated me as a person.

I was able to maintain my composure until November, the month I began gushing over him photographing him. It irritated all of my friends.

His behavior towards me was cold. He just wanted nothing to do with me at all. It was doubtful that he would hate me, but he certainly did not reciprocate my feelings.

Nonetheless, whenever I had the opportunity to be faced with him, I would tag by him like a sick puppy. He would have been evidently disdained, so he would impulsively lie (a habit of his) to avert himself from me.

One day, I decided to tell him because I had the opportunity. His response was so apathetic and cold. He did show some sympathy, but it was beyond readable he did not appreciate my company. He abandoned me, crying, in the school parking lot. I was crying so harshly the cold wind crystallized my tears. I did nothing but sob and walk in circles when I returned home. I was so broken, distraught. I built a world and all of it came crumbling. I would say that I was about to color it, but the heartbreak caused the loss of every color aside for black and grey, the telltale symbols of my despair.

My classmates learned of the situation and their reactions were... funny. They believed me to be insane or stupid for admiring him, given that he was “very ugly” to all of them. I also acquired the achievement of being the first girl to have ever liked him.

In January, my photography of him became evident. His friend (who despises my being) screamed “IT’S NOT NICE TO TAKE PICTURES OF YOUR CLASSMATES!!” then few days sooner, my crush himself gave me a rude gesture.

I was gradually breaking, shattering really. It was my understanding that my unrequited love could have been one of the most futile accessories of my life, but merely, the bittersweet experience- if I were to fall out of love with him, I would always be bound to love him because the nature of his existence is so extraordinary. It is one of the beauties of this world. He is the “perfect boy” with a taint that curses him to hideousness.

I grasped onto stalking him because it seemed correct.

I felt so weak because he seemed to have been generating sympathy for himself. I had never felt so ugly. My approach was quite childish... so I stabbed him with a pencil and told him to get raped in prison. I did take a few pictures, but that is harmless.

My self-esteem had vanished. I was a hideous “girl” with the appearance of a boy that no boy would ever love. The density of that realization was crushing my bones.

What hurt me the most was when he struck me once... or twice... it never made sense- his fear- when I recognized that he could effortlessly do serious harm to me, so I never understood why he lacked the nerve almost entirely. It would still hurt my feelings but at least he touched me.

The most excruciating pain was nearing the end of the first semester, when he was desperate to know my classes to ensure he would not be cursed with my presence ever again. For two semesters so far, he had received his wish. I asked him if he hated me and he said that he did. I felt unloved.

My reaction was quite childish, which spawns the mystery...

From February onwards, we had been avoiding each other. Of course, I am still enthralled to see his visuals because I liked to imagine a world where he was the courageous, eccentric boyfriend I had always strived to have. But I was always anguished seeing him, as he was with me. It reminisced him of fear, it reminisced me of my ugliness. And the imagination... dreaming is dangerous since it deludes you to such a pleasantry that would never exist in such a grueling reality.

Throughout the year, I heard rumors of how he was attending therapy and had diagnosed with paranoia, and mostly, seriously contemplating filing a restraining order on me. I was quite aghast when I figured he never reported me to the school faculty, but I guess I am relieved.

I disputed the rumors. I thought they were cruel jokes on either of us. The premise of him having gone insane because of me is so far-fetched, like something that would never occur. Is he really so cowardly to have such a reaction (if he did attend Hogwarts, he would be in Hufflepuff; I, Slytherin) to a situation as trivial as my childish behavior? Think realistically: is a feral negro man really going to escape from prison to rape you because the eerie girl said it would happen?

But recently, I overheard him in conversation (and it seemed private). “Oh god.” (he says “Oh god” a lot) “Yeah I know her. I have paranoia and went to therapy because of her.” Sounding very solemn.

Am I really such a bad person? Or is he really such a pussy? I hardly even did anything aside for some childish acts that most girls would do when they are self-destructing.

The MyPEEPS Mobile study at Ann & Robert H. Lurie Children's Hospital of Chicago is looking for young guys who are into other guys, between the ages of 13 to 18, to help us test a mobile HIV prevention app. Eligible individuals will complete surveys and be given the app to use. Participants will be compensated for their time (up to $275).

MyPEEPS Mobile is a nation-wide research study at Birmingham (Alabama), Chicago (Illinois), New York City, and Seattle (Washington).

To find out if you are eligible, please go to:
https://redcap.sac-cu.org/surveys/index.php?s=K3RJACWLYM

Or, please call us at 312-600-5168 so that we can see if you might be a good fit for the project.

More information about the study can be found on our website: https://www.mypeepsmobile.org/ and https://www.luriechildrens.org/en/specialties-conditions/adolescent-medicine/research/

Other partner institutions include: Columbia University, University of Washington, and University of Alabama at Birmingham.

Approved by the Columbia University IRB (PI: R. Schnall, # IRB-AAAQ6500).