The names are Shubhi Rajput and Rohil Budhiraja, I’ve been racking my brain but can’t come up with anything. Would really appreciate y’alls help in coming up with hashtags

My brother got married 2 months ago. He dated her for almost a year before they got married. They met on a matrimonial website. Initially when he told our family about her we were happy for him but as things progressed we started to be against it. Reasons being her being a smoker and weed user and her family coming off overly strong towards my brother. My mom being orthodox also did not like their horoscopes not matching and her not being traditionally attractive. Her family invited him to her brother’s wedding within a month of them dating and without even having a conversation with my side of the family which felt super suspicious to us. Then her father kept pressuring him to make a decision and get married.

Now my brother is 33 years old but not experienced in relationships. Before this he had not been in any romantic relationship. Her father spoke with my mom about getting them married and my mom voiced her concerns regarding the lifestyle differences and said no. Brother started to fight with us over marrying her. It got to a point that we didnt speak to him for months and months because all he would talk about was getting married to her and not consider any of our concerns regarding her. Her father was happy to go ahead with the wedding without my family’s approval and he got the wedding arranged. Ultimately we attended their wedding despite our reservations.

They moved cities right after the wedding since my brother switched his job. They had had the conversations about how they would manage household expenses before getting married and she had agreed that both would contribute to them. They stayed together in the new city for a month constantly fighting over expenses since she contributed next to nothing. She went back to her parents home after that without a date to return. During this time we learnt from my brother that she had some loans that she was paying off which had mentioned vaguely to my brother before getting married saying i will tell you the details after the wedding. My brother wanted exact details of the loans - the amounts, the tenure so that he could plan the house expenses accordingly. All hell breaks loose at this point! She was adamant on not telling him the details and we had a lot of phone calls with her twisting details, blaming my brother for so much mental stress that she could not eat or sleep and that she was going into depression. She kept telling my brother not to involve family in this matter while constantly involving her father to coerce my brother to forget about the loans. My brother did not give up citing that if he is going to bear her expenses because she cant, he has every right to know where her salary is going. She went through every route possible to not tell him the details - got her father involved, pretending to be depressed and sick while going all around the city with friends, telling him its none of his business, gaslighting him, making every excuse under the sun.

Then my mom called her dad to ask when was she returning to my brother. She gets upset over that as well. She spent the entire month of january at her parents place with no date to return before that phone call was made. Now she booked tickets to go back to my brother. The day before she went back she had a 2 hour conversation with my husband complaining about my brother on how he was not understanding her situation and troubling her. My husband told her point blank to clear everything up to saver her marriage as everyone was just losing patience and trust in her. Then the same night she calls my brother along with her father to force him to forget about the loans.

Next day she travels back and starts pretending to be sick again. My brother calls me telling about this and i speak to her asking her to go the doctor. She says i have been forced to come back and i cant afford to go to the doctor because i need to pay your brother for the house expenses. I insist and then she says that its just exhaustion and it will be okay with rest. She again has a huge conversation with my husband because she accused him of forcing her to go back. Then she says that her father instructed her not to give details about the loans. The situation comes to the point that my brother tells her that he cant continue with this marriage if she cant come clean. At this point she does give him the details.

So with a salary of 55000pm she is paying various personal loans and credit card bills worth 48000pm and this will continue for the next 2 years. I dont understand how she expects to live in a tier 1 city with 7000rs pm while paying rent. My brother is super hurt and suspicious of her now because of all this behaviour. My brother earns 3 times her salary and is concerned that she is just fobbing him off. She has told her entire family that all of this became such a huge issue because of my brother. As soon as she cleared this up suddenly she was not unwell anymore.

My brother has told her that he will think and decide how wants to proceed now. To us it feels unimaginable how she has conducted herself. I am very much a principled person and do not like people who try to deceit. Once i lose trust on someone i cant have a relationship with them. But thats how me, my husband and my sister feel. My brother is torn on whether to continue this marriage or not purely because he too has lost all trust on her.

Are we being biased and not seeing the full picture here? Are we being too righteous to expect honesty and transparency in financial matters from her? Are we paying too much attention on too little things? What do you guys think?

TLDR; newly married couple have conflict over hiding unpaid loans taken before getting married

Hi everyone! I’m American and marrying into a telugu family. My future MIL wants to get my bridal outfits from India when she visits next. I need to tell her what I want but I have no idea what really looks bridal vs a normal saree. If you guys could drop some pictures of your wedding ceremony looks that would be amazing Also if anyone knows some good online shops for my bridesmaids, family, and guests to look for sarees please leave your recommendations.

I recently got married. My husband has two sisters-in-law. His whole family, including his sisters-in-law, came from abroad to celebrate our wedding in my country. I will soon move to my husband’s country after the visa process is completed.

They came to our house for the Haldi ceremony. Haldi was supposed to be applied to the designated area on our hands. When it was my sister-in-law’s turn to apply Haldi, her 3-year-old daughter wanted to put it on my face. I preferred it to be applied to my hand to preserve my makeup for photos. Despite my preference, I let her daughter apply it to my cheek. After some time, her daughter wanted to apply it to my face again. I politely told her to apply it to the designated area on my hand. Without looking at me, my sister-in-law, while addressing her daughter, said, “Even if Haldi gets applied to aunt’s face, nothing would happen,” and allowed her daughter to apply it to my face again. During their entire time at our house, she did not acknowledge me.

As the wedding festivities began, at the first event, she wore dramatic, bridal-level makeup. While I was in the bridal room before making my entrance, she entered with her daughter to change her clothes and did not acknowledge me or say hi. A hotel helper came in, apologizing to my sister-in-law for not letting her use another room as it was being cleaned. The helper repeatedly apologized, but my sister-in-law, indifferent, was busy changing her daughter’s clothes. When she stood up, her phone fell, and the helper picked it up and handed it to her. Her daughter started making noises and faces because the lady touched her mother’s phone. They then left my bridal room.

At the next event, my sister-in-law wore a fully elaborate bridal dress, even more elaborate than mine, with heavy makeup, an elaborate hairstyle, and jewelry, looking like a bride. She entered my bridal room again, bossing the helpers around. She barely acknowledged me and acted as if I wasn’t present. She instructed the helpers to pin her daughter’s heavy lehenga. When the helper expressed concern about possibly hurting her with a pin, she replied, “Do that, and I will not leave you.” She then adjusted her daughter’s lehenga herself. I asked the helper for a cushion to place behind my back. As the helper was about to hand it to me, my sister-in-law said, “Do what I told you to do first.” Then she left the bridal room.

Later, on stage during some traditions, she stood near me and my husband. She told her husband that she would sit with her brother-in-law (my husband) to perform the traditions.

At the main event, she again wore a very elaborate dress (which looked cheap but was fully elaborate), heavy jewelry, and full bridal makeup. Generally, it’s a tradition and courtesy for the in-laws to greet and compliment the bride in the bridal room before the main event, making her feel welcome. Only my mother-in-law came in and greeted me; neither of the sisters-in-law bothered to come in. When I made my entrance, everyone was standing, capturing photos, and cheering, but that sister-in-law probably went out of the hall during that moment. As this function was arranged by our side of the family, my mother gifted gold necklaces and earrings to both of my husband’s sisters-in-law and my mother-in-law. Since my husband’s father is no more, my mother gifted an Armani watch to my elder brother-in-law, as he is like a father figure to his other two brothers after their father’s death. The middle sister-in-law went to my mother-in-law and started making an issue about why my husband did not receive a watch. She ensured that my mother-in-law raised this issue with my mother, insisting that at the next event, my mother should also gift a watch to her husband.

At the final event, while I was making my entrance into the wedding venue with my husband, everyone was standing, cheering, and capturing the moments, but that sister-in-law kept sitting in her seat.

After the wedding, she messaged me to send her photos from the wedding. I was busy preparing for a language test right after my wedding, as the exam was just 15 days later, and the photos were on my laptop, not my phone. I told her I would send them. I even tried but was unable to transfer the photos to my phone. Later, after a month, I sent her the photos, and she did not even read my message or view the chat.

I also heard from a family member that this sister-in-law is very competitive and wants to outshine everyone in everything they do. She will try to outshine you in every little thing to look accomplished in the eyes of the in-laws. When she first came to my house, she did not bring any gift for me, despite my mother giving her a monetary gift as it was her first visit to our house, and she did not even say thank you. When she entered our large mansion, her eyes widened upon seeing our beautiful home, as she herself belonged to a very middle-class home before marriage. That’s not a problem, but even during our first meeting, she behaved as if she was superior. I tried to talk to her to create a bond, but she gave very short answers. When we were taking photos in our garden, her daughter started crying, and the sister-in-law told me that her daughter is very possessive about her mom and dad and does not like anyone standing close to her mother. I thought, “What the heck?”

So, I want to ask, should I bring her a gift when I move to my husband’s country and visit her house? The elder sister-in-law brought me a gift when she first came to our house to meet me. I would definitely bring her a gift. But should I do it for the other sister-in-law? Also, what kind of personality does my sister-in-law have? How should I deal with her in the future? And why she is behaving like that with me instead of making me feel welcome into the family when I did nothing wrong with her ?

Anyone have recs for a sari draper in LA?

How much does a bridal from Rano’s cost? How many months in advance do you have to preorder?

Hi,

I don't normally go to many weddings / functions so I'm not sure what kind of styles are in fashion at the moment? Does anyone have info on what kind of thing is on trend for Women to wear to an Indian Punjabi wedding. It's my cousin brothers so I want to wear something nice. I think my cousins like to wear those cropped blouses with a lengha skirt (might be called something else) but I don't really want have my stomach exposed, at the same time don't want to have an outfit that looks dated. Any help would be appreciated, I'm trying to start myself a pinterest board :S

Also if people know where in the UK I can actually order them, I'm going to go to wembley, southall, and maybe soho road, not sure what the order should be amongst them, but are there any online places I can check out? My budget is about £300 - £400 per item and I think I need to get 4 outfits minimum.

Thanks :)

Bought this today didnt want to buy sharara or divider other things were out of my budget l. But now i m regretting after buying this as it looks outdated to me now 😅

Guys pls help me out. My foundation shade in maybelline fitme is 128 warm nude. I have neutral undertone. Can anyone tell me what will be my shade in loreal infallible foundation as the testers were not available in-store and most shades are available online only

I am tamil. He is telugu. Its a love marriage.

I love my fiance to bits. I am still trying to adapt to his family and traditions though . After our wedding is done in the morning, we are supposed to go to his parent’s place to attend a pooja done by pandit in the evening between 7-8:30 pm. It is their tradition to have our first night in their house apparently. Here is where it gets weird. They want me to wear a pure cotton white saree without any designs or colors for the first night. I am also supposed to wear the same saree for the next 2 days I stay at their place. I find this tradition extremely outdated because who checks if a girl is a virgin in this time and century! Or they maybe want to know if we consummated which is also nosy. Besides, ours is a love marriage. So, I dont see a point why this needs to be done. I am feeling very annoyed about this tradition and it angers me that even educated people have such backward thoughts. This tradition is new to me since I am from a different community

My fiance was equally shocked when he heard about this too. When he enquired it with his mom, she jokingly brushed it off. She said that the white saree has to be worn for the pooja and since first night happens right after that, I can wear the same for it too. I am not convinced though. I dont want to make a mountain out of a mole but this just feels wrong. What do you all think I should do?

So I’m doing my own makeup as I want it to come out how I want, last time I had a bad experience with an MUA I looked so different. Also in terms of my hair I will be getting someone else to do it but is it better for them to come to my house or do it at the bridal suite at the venue? Thank you

I don't know if my budget is practical or not but I don't want to buy my Bridal lehenga from chandni chowk. Can someone please suggest some good and budget friendly designers? My wedding is in November so I have plenty of time to explore. Thanks!

My wedding is fast approaching (4/29), and we still haven't picked a venue. We're expecting around 150 guests (Indian wedding). Can y’all send me recommendations for the following vendors? Our budget is $25-30K considering it’s a weekday wedding.

• Outdoor venues that don’t charge an outside catering fee
• Photographer/Videographer
• Decoration/Floral
• Bridal hair and makeup

I was a little hesitant at first buying this particular outfit, I thought it would look too weird or not good but during our function it mingled well with the decor and environment. It was a day function. Worth it! My mother was the most surprised out of everyone.

Hi, I’m looking for recommendations on where to buy plus size Anarkali, sharara suits and lengha for my cousin’s wedding. I need a size 46 in the chest. I live in Chicago and go to Devon street but only a handful of stores carry sizes above 42. I also get weird looks when I walk into some boutique stores on Devon because they don’t carry sizes to fit me.

Are there any reputable websites I could buy from? Any stores in the Chicagoland area that carry plus size wedding guest attire?

Hi Everyone, just looking for websites and also reviews of anyone that has experience with ordering any indian outfits online and if anyone could recommend anything?

So far I have had a look at Seasons India, which seems alright.

https://www.seasonsindia.com/?srsltid=AfmBOoptZ_ajAANEWw82yEMgkhAKAykDoDxGmWsfCJ08E_LyDtWf-gGa

https://www.reddit.com/r/DesiWeddings/s/oJp7hIFHgK

So continued from the above post. My Friend got married 26F in December and as suggested by the community and my self introspection i 26M had cut the all ties with her because her husband wanted us to go No Contact Thing after marriage because he had misunderstanding that our 8 year old friendship was a relationship which was not. I stopped talking to her from the day of her wedding and its been 2 months now where we haven’t talked to each other.

Out of the blue moon i got a secret call from her groom enquiring about her. First he asked not to tell her that he called me and then he went on asking some pathetic questions about her.

1. Was she CLEAN before marriage?

2. Does she had sexual relationships with anyone before the marriage ?

That was the exact questions he asked me about her and i was shocked at his mentality.

First thing she is your wife and if you want to investigate such abysmal questions, better time was before the wedding. I blocked my connection with her for sake of their happy marriage and now this guy comes and asking for her character certificate after 2 months of the marriage.

It was very hard to digest such things about my close friend. Years have been passed but absurd mentality of some people has not.

I have too many weddings to attend and it’s all close family so I cannot rewear some things.

I’m looking to buy around 10/11 outfits. Hence why I need it cheap as possible. I’ve looked on amazon. Anyone have any recommendations they have personally used? Really don’t want to make a trip to India. Any websites that are reliable anything. Doesn’t matter how long shipping takes. It’s all in the summer. But in preparing now. I’m in Philadelphia

Thanks all.

Is it necessary do guests expect it?

Share 1 advice

Hi, we’re south asian (punjabi to be exact- so pretty big drinkers) and our reception is going to have 500 guests and we want to serve our own liquor at the banquet hall. Anyone have personal experience with supplying their own liquor to the venue and if so, how many bottles did they get?

Looking for places in the GTA that can work within budgets for Pakistani-style wedding dresses. I was originally looking at Ilsa by Samsara but saw a post here about how they’re basically a scam and horrible to work with, and I have friends that have had a bad experience at Dulhan by Mischief so looking for some other options that aren’t outrageously expensive.

Hi! I am invited to a multi-cultural wedding in the UK where one of the parties, and my friend, is punjabi and need some advice on how to dress. Here are my circumstances:

1. I live in a European country with zero (as far as I know) places where I could get any appropriate desi wedding clothes.
2. I am white, but the groom has told me the dresscode is Indian/British formal and that he encourages me to come in Indian attire if I like it since it would make him very happy.
3. My dad has travelled to India many times for work so I own some bangles and a saree my mum bought in the late 90s-early 00s in a big department store in Mumbai. I attach the picture (sadly it's the only one I had and the quality is not the best, but it's supposed to be green). I wore a cropped shirt underneath because it was short notice and my mum had lost the choli.

https://preview.redd.it/6a3tjcmy7dge1.png?width=201&format=png&auto=webp&s=a60dcf139c73fda07fd07df6ebde30c54e66f3c4

So my questions are:

• Is showing up in a saree like the one in the pic kind of like showing up in a random 90s dress that is totally old-fashioned?
• Is a saree in plain colours (no patterns, no decorations or beading) appropriate for a wedding?
• I really like lehenga sets, in case the saree is not an option. Are there any shops you'd recommend that ship to Europe and that are not a scam? I am having a hard time figuring out which are too good to be true and which are legit. I am also kind of on a budget, which makes me an easy prey to scam websites...
• Are bangles ok to wear or do they have more meaning and could be cultural appropriation?
• Are there any colours that I should avoid?

Hey I’m 24 years old and doing a job. I recently broke up with my previous gf and finding the friend with whom can I share my things. May be it’s all online but if the same person agreed then make it offline also if possible. Making online friends having better nowadays. Tell me your opinions also.

I'm based in the UK. The wedding will be in summer and I am on the look out for a reliable online shop. I have checked out Lashkaraa and LAAM. Are they ok? Lengha or Anarkali would be perfect!

Hi all,

I need some tips because I am super clueless about what to wear. This is going to be my first time attending an Indian wedding. I need 3 outfits. Please recommend some websites/Instagram accounts in India where I can buy traditional clothes? Ideally I'd love to shop in stores but with a baby, it's been challenging to find the time to go out. And if you could recommend some styles that would flatter a postpartum body, that would be super helpful! Thank you in advance ☺️