How come other people get to be in relationships and do cute couples things, while I sit here getting old and getting drunk all by myself?

Cause life is unfair.

Love is a lie.

And the only purpose for me is to suffer.

God can go fuck themself.

No all knowing, all powerful, all good deity would allow this to happen to one person, let alone hundreds or thousands or millions of us

I went to a therapist for like 6 months, I've been seeing a psychiatrist for over a year, I'm taking medication, I've started going out with friends more often even going to clubs and picking up girls (which I never thought I could do). Still I'm as unhappy as I've ever been, taking medication helps but I still get extremely depressed every 2 weeks or so. I want to tell my parents about this but I don't know how to do it and I doubt they could even help me, as if all that wasn't enough I'm also suicidal, every bad day pushes me closer to doing it. It sucks

There are plenty of things about myself that I honestly hate. I hate my interests. I hate the way I look. I hate the way I talk. I hate the way that I'm always depressed and stuff. It's honestly no wonder that I continuously struggle making friends. At this point, maybe it's better that I just stay alone. This way people won't feel like they're inclined to be my friend or anything. It sucks though, because I just want friendship more than anything. Not having friends hurt so much. Also, whenever people do become my friend, they just leave me one way or another. It's all my fault. I'm a bad person.

But you know what? That's okay. Coming to terms with that maybe a good thing, because I can use my experience to help others. Others more deserving of friendship. Not trash like me. I guess in this way, I kind of found my purpose in life. To help others. To use my experience to make people feel better about themselves. It can be rewarding work, but sometimes I wish I could get some of that feel good energy. However, I guess scum like me aren't deserving of it.

i just moved away for college (i’m 21) and i’m living with my best friend, due to my past with self harm she’s taken away all my razors (i haven’t self harmed in almost a year now). I know it’s for a good reason but how do i explain to her that this makes me feel worse than helps🥲? I don’t like the feeling of being babied due to my mental health issues, before this my mom had hidden every knife in my house/ razor for 2 years and now that im away i would like to feel more independent. also not to mention this makes me think about the self harm more than if i just lived normally. what do i say to her for her to give them back to me?😭

I've hit a new low. I was able to sleep 4 hrs in the past. Couldn't sleep tonight. I'm lying outside on the ground when I have a perfectly good home and bed to go back to. I can't go on like this. My family is going to fall apart soon because of me. I want to just leave the family so that they won't have to watch me go insane.

I have a dilemma and I need a 3rd party perspective. Background: I’m f48, I have schizophrenia that is manageable, (kinda), unless I get super stressed or have big emotions, etc. then I can get really angry, depressed, self harm, delusions and paranoia. I take medicine for this and it helps. When I’m in a stable condition, my symptoms are manageable. When I’m stressed, (not stable), my symptoms can appear. Even in the face of this - I am looking for love and I wish I could find a partner (male). I currently use dating apps and go to meetups to meet people although somewhat unsuccessfully. Currently I receive $3k monthly disability. I have a good resume, 16+ years experience but it’s in broad project management type skills. I have a masters in business degree. I’m a generalist, no specialization aside from if you consider my Latin American experience and Spanish skills. I wish I could be an international executive but I’ve looked around and that requires a specialization of some sort. Not a generalist. That’s at least what I’ve been told by recruiters. I do have nine years experience with international business project management (for hr, accounting, legal). I haven’t worked in a formal sense in 8 years though, I have a big resume gap. During that time I was doing creative projects: singing in a band, writing a book, pursuing artistic ideas I had to give that a try. Currently, I live where I work, I get free rent in exchange for doing easy work. It’s boring but it gives me structure.
I have an fwb too - I really like him a lot. I wish he would commit to me, however he won’t. He cheats on me all the time. And he tells me he doesn’t want a relationship even though I do. So my questions are: What should I do? Should I find a full-time job, maybe via a temp agency and start again from the bottom?
in this scenario, I would replace my current disability income with full-time job income. Eventually, I would get to have my own apartment, and maybe a better partner would be attracted if I’m employed? This option is a bit dangerous because of my symptoms and how they can pop up and I’m concerned if I lose my Social Security disability, I won’t be able to go back on it after, at the same level. Or - should I do nothing? This is sketchy because my living situation is temporary and if I don’t have a higher income getting a place to live that’s safe will be harder. I wish I could find a $600 rent monthly apartment close to a city or in a city where there’s bustling work and money to be made, and hot men willing to commit to a relationship. Any ideas are appreciated.

I’ve been depressed before but it’s been getting worse. All I do now is stay and my room and barely go out. I just scroll through reels because I don’t want to confront my thoughts or sadness. I feel empty and lonely. I don’t have anybody to talk to not even my family. They don’t notice or ask me what’s wrong. My nursing program dismissed me bc of my declining grades. I just didn’t care about school at all. Or anything for that matter. I’m also unemployed. I have goals and aspirations in life but I just want stay in bed all day and sleep. I’m physically there but my soul is tired. I’ve battled with depression for 5 years. I just don’t know what to do anymore. I don’t want to be like this I want to work and be productive and do things. But I’m just so alone all of the time and feel there’s no purpose to life. I have everything but there’s just a deep sadness within me. I don’t have a boyfriend or friends so I’m super alone. I know suicide is not the answer but sometimes I feel like it.

Title. While I’m able-bodied, my anxiety is so intense and debilitating that it causes physical sickness, fainting and severe long-lasting effects constantly. I’m extremely agoraphobic. I can’t work. How am I going to live in the future with no finances and no way of providing for myself? If I rely on a partner they could just leave me or die. Finances make me so sick I’m literally bedridden with anxiety. I don’t want to live but I don’t want to die. The person I adore is overseas and has no possibility of coming here anytime soon. It’d make so much more sense if he found a girl he liked there instead. She could touch him and be there for him unlike me. His life is blossoming with new career opportunities and friends and I feel I only hold him back. I feel so alone despite being surrounded by people.

im young, been homeschooled whole life with depression and something that i got from that is never never being satisfied and always sooo bored. i’m moving to a bigger city soon and i’ll know ill be able to do more but im genuinely worried that when i DO get more control i’ll act impulsive and needy on unhealthy stuff, im already noticing that from a young age one of my outlets was talking to way older people esp cuz it makes me feel like im actually doing something fun ?? and even then recently i feel like i can do anyythingg and not have any consequences (even if i don’t usually act on it) Idk just need help on what to do before i start doing worse things for stimulation !!

Why is life so hard? I don't feel anything is worth it anymore. It feels like I'm the only one stuck in this hellhole while everyone else is moving forward. I wish I could find a purpose; I am supposed to live, not just survive.

I haven’t stopped crying in days. I can’t even work properly without crawling in a corner to hide my tears. I can’t do anything in my normal life without breaking down. I made the wrong choice, I made the wrong decision. I may have regained missing parts of me lost long ago, but I’ve lost anything and everything that mattered.

I can’t even die. I’ve tried, multiples times now. Just 2 nights ago, and failed. At this point I’ll have to go down the messy lethal ways to succeed. I just didn’t want to hurt anyone else or have someone clean up the mess. But I think that’s my only way now.

Why did you have to do that to me? Why did you have to bring the feelings I’ve been choking down on, back up? Why do I hate myself so much? What is wrong with me? Why couldn’t I just listen to you when you begged me to stay?

Why? Why….

I have been in deep depression for years now because of so many unfortunate events and too many problems. I have been seeing the doctors for more than 10 years now. I just changed meds and dosage last few days and today I feel really really bad and I have no one to talk to. I have no friends. I need someone to talk to or I am going crazy again. I already did something to myself today. Please please help me :((

i’ve had phases where i’ve felt low, really low; i tried to end it all a couple years back. since then ive had times where i’ve been really happy, gotten into a routine, and felt like myself again. But since my fall semester of college started it’s been rough. I thought i was just having fun but now im not so sure. i sleep all day and struggle to get myself to get out of bed to go to class or eat. I do cocaine 3-4 times a week, i can’t stop myself from getting drunk even if it’s a weekday and i have classes the morning after, and im on my phone constantly. i eat pretty healthy, make sure to get exercise, and am living with some of my best friends. im not suicidal, but i wouldn’t mind just disappearing from the face of the earth .im not really sure what im making this post for, if im asking for advice or if im just ranting because i feel like i have nobody to talk to, but any thoughts are appreciated. edit - also have adhd if that matters

Hey there, i have a problem

I'm struggling with wether i have a depressive disorder, or if just my reality is crap and i can't seem to cope.

In general, my life is good. I got a job, earn enough money to feed my family, are within my 30s and, as far as i know, healthy (a bit chubby), have a wife and two kidz, my fridge is always full, my roof doesn't leak, i'm in a first world country.

My life should be way above average.

Yet i don't feel good.

And i know what a depression is, but do i have one? Do i have seritonin problems or is it just my reality?

I tell you, what my usual downers are:

First of all, and this might sound strange to some, but my believes. I've come to realize that everything ends someday and nothing anybody does might be important.

This is something i can't often cope with.

2nd. Im a writer, but my books don't sell. I'm not that good or that bad, but the market is floosed and nobody cares for what i've written. Not even family.

I'm an Artist, and i'm not good nor bad, but, as above, the world is oversaturated with art, and now that a.i. exists, why draw anyway?

My two children are all "mom" kidz, so, i get less from them. But i don't show them, that it hurts, they are children, they don't know better,and i don't want to guilt-force to show more affection. It's alright. After all i'm just a dad.

I have coworkers, but i don't have friends.

Not that i couldn't get, people seem to like me and laugh a lot when i'm around.

But i always think, that people might not really care if i'm not around, or they might just be polite and don't want to anger a big bulky guy. I don't know.

My wife is, in general, a good person, but she doesn't care that much about my interests. Everytime i try to show her a cool new song i'm listening to, or want to show her some art or what i've written, she usually sighs and makes a face.

We've had that discussion, but she often says, it's just a joke and i shouldn't take ut personally.

I don't know.

If i'd be given depression medication, those problems wouldn't just disappear. Nor would talking about them would make them just go away.

What is wrong with me?

I feel misplaced, like an alien sometimes.

And no, no life ending thoughts.

If i could wish for it, i'd chose eternal life tbh.

Hello, and hope you are doing well today whoever ends up reading this. Just wanted to vent by more or less saying everything that I’ve felt and still feel throughout my whole life. I have difficulties expressing my emotions to people in person so I thought why not this. Sorry if this just ends up being my life story. Also apologies cause I’m gonna ramble a bit.

So I (23M) have had feeling of depression and intense feelings of loneliness for almost my entire life. When I was a child my dad would frequently mentally abuse me and my mother, as well as physically abuse me on occasion. He would tell me I was worthless, threaten to kill me, he’d threaten to kill my pets and would beat them in front of me whenever they did something “out of line”. My mom was also the target of said abuse and would occasionally redirect the abuse she had received back onto me, mainly through yelling and whatnot, nothing physical. I don’t blame her, I feel like she didn’t know how to deal with the abuse so it indirectly got pushed to me. I still love my mom. This occurred from around 1st grade to 11th grade for me. It finally ended when my father was sent to jail for making meth with his brother. He would’ve gotten off of the charge, but he refused to give information on one of his gang friends who tried to car bomb someone (They were all in the Hell’s Angels, doesn’t make it normal, just adding context).

Ever since the age of around 8 I’ve just had a loneliness that won’t ever go away. It feels like a hole or pit in my chest that won’t go away. And I can feel it as weird as it sounds, it just hurts. There’s nothing there it just fucking hurts. I’ve got pretty bad ADHD as well as OCD, so my thoughts always race around and repeat themselves. The bad thoughts constantly race through my head and they won’t fucking stop after I think about them one time. I have moments of extreme joy, then back down to rock fucking bottom. The happiness never stays, and it always scares me to feel happy, because the depression comes back worst right after. Constant repeating thoughts telling me I’m worthless, ugly, should just die, to kill my self. For hours and fucking hours until I just kinda give out and stop feeling anything. I hate it. I get fucking depressed the instant I look in the mirror. I hate seeing myself. I think I’m disgusting, worthless, useless, weak. I hate how I fucking feel. I feel like I’ve never felt love, or care, or fucking anything. The only good feelings I get are when I somehow fucking hype myself up on “Well I’m tough for still going after everything, and all the thoughts I have”. Or some shit like that. I’ve told my friends pieces of how I feel, but they don’t really “get it” as fucking dumb as that sounds. One friend told me to “go to a therapist”, which admittedly IS sound advice. But I just really wish they’d tell me that they were gonna help somehow, they’d always listen, or whatever else, I don’t even know. Just fucking rambling. I know I should appreciate them, but sometimes I just wish they’d ask me how doing, or a random person would notice, or god something would just fucking send me a sign, help, I don’t know. I just want it to stop. And nothing does, it always comes back. I’d like to feel like I have decent relationships with people, but if my own dad fucking hated me, and would treat me that way, it feels like I deserve it. I hate it, I hate myself. I don’t even know why. I long for what it’d feel like to just have someone tell me everything is gonna be okay, to just fucking hold me. It’s pathetic, I’m pathetic, my life is just feelings of worthlessness and self doubt.

I don’t have issues making friends either, and I think that’s the most fucked up part. I put on a mask for all social situations. I can make friends, I pretty much get along with anyone. But I can’t connect or feel like I can open up to a single one of them. Because I’m so fucking afraid, so scared of being seen as weak or whatever else. I feel like I need a fucking angel to come save me. I beg, pray, plead with god some nights to either save me from how I feel or to just put me out of my misery. The only peace I have is when I feel nothing, and what peace even is that. I want to feel, I want to show others how much I care, how much I think about them, how much I’d do fucking anything for them. My own life is worthless to me, so why not make someone else’s better. Because I never want anyone to feel how I feel. But all I do now is just sleep whenever I get home because I just start feeling the loneliness creep in and can’t take it, so I just sleep.

I just wanted to get that all out. Thank you if you read it. Sorry for all the rambling bits could’ve kept going but that would probably be annoying, I know I tend to yap a little. I hope you have a nice day, and best wishes.

The weight of it all. The exhaustion after smiling, the sudden realization that it wasn’t all entirely genuine. The emptiness after there is no stage left to preform on and just wanting to walk off the edge.

I woke up this morning with this heavy, empty feeling. It’s like all I want is someone next to me, someone to hold, but there’s no one. And I can’t even find the energy to get up and do something about it. I think about all the people out there, people with their lives and their loves, and it feels like I’m stuck in this place where I can’t reach them, no matter how much I want to.

I want to feel close to someone, but it’s like there’s this thick glass wall between me and the rest of the world. I know I should try, maybe just get out there and meet people, but the thought of it makes me so tired. It’s like when I try to think about talking to someone, my brain just shuts off. And that sadness, it’s like a weight, pulling me down, making everything seem too far away, too difficult.

And yet, there’s this deep, aching need for that connection. Like I want to be loved, but I can’t find a way to get there. I don’t even know if I have the confidence to try anymore. It’s just this emptiness, and I wonder if this is how it’s always going to feel. But I don’t want it to be.

Has it ever happened to you that you’re living a life that many would dream of, but on the inside, you feel completely shattered and depressed? I have everything I need—enough savings, a roof over my head, and things seem to be in place—but I don’t have a job at the moment, and it’s really weighing on me.

My mind is constantly filled with thoughts I can’t control, and no matter how hard I try, I can’t seem to keep it in check. I’m smiling and acting happy on the outside, but on the inside, all I want to do is shout and cry. I’m just so tired of feeling like this and don’t know what to do anymore.

Has anyone else felt this way? Any advice on how to handle it?

The person I was about 12 years ago is no more. The person I was about 5 years ago (2019) is also no more. After 2020, The year my Grandfather passed away, even after 4 years nothing is the same. He left me, pulled me out of my comfort zone and threw me into a world filled with criticism, toxicity, narcissism, and a world where everyone needs to be perfect, have good grades, look good, act good etc. He was my shield against all of this. everything feels so fake rn. The ppl are so so toxic, They only keep their self interest supreme. they act like they care and they are healing me, but they are not doing anything. When I fail, they blame me. When I get aggressive, They blame me. Sometimes the ppl who are good in studies they belittle me for not being as good as them. they have an attitude that they are only the best. The schools only care about grades and marks. Marks marks and fucking marks is everything. Good behaviour is often overlooked when they see someone is the top scorer. this toxic environment is messing with my brain. I fucking hate everyone. First they will ruin your mental health and then they will expect u to be normal and pretend to help you. No one cares about anyone anymore. Its sad how this culture is being propagated where even if u want to show love, you will be hated. when u will hate, they will blame u for hating. A bunch of fucking assholes!

FUCK EVERYONE WHO IS LIKE THAT. NO NEED TO BE AFRAID. ITS TIME TO LIVE LIFE YOUR OWN WAY. BE FEARLESS. BE SHAMELESS

To clarify; I do not physically harm anyone. I take long walks, which used to help. But my partner now stresses the entire time thinking I'm off to kill myself. I do have suicidal thoughts during my depressive bouts. An overwhelming amount. I have no friends I can talk to. Talking to my partner about any of it makes them break down into tears, which pushes me further intothe ideation because I cause them hurt. We can't afford healthcare. I know that I have bipolar ii. I've known that my 'good day' periods jave grown fewer and far between. No job. No prospects. No outlet.

I have no purpose. Less than ever before. I've been able to stay alive this long. There is no "one more day" pep talk to myself anymore. Just waves and waves of anger, guilt and loathing.

I've suffered through this since childhood and everyone around me has always rolled their eyes and said I'll grow out of it. I'm pushing 40 man. I'm a drain on those around me. There's nothing I bring to the table and no one to talk to when I'm in pain. The most logical option has long been ending it. Day after day of waking up to nothing but Taking from the world with nothing to give has more than taken its toll on me.

I want help. I need help. I truly do not know what to do and feel powerless to change it. The world and those around me would be better off if I weren't here. Nothing in the last three decades has proven otherwise. Despite putting the best foot forward. Despite working hard, being passionate and caring for folks. The world sans-me is unchanged.

There’s no point to this post. I feel so selfish even expressing my feelings. My life at its current stage is probably the most settled it’s ever been, I grew up with significant family violence and then had relationships with men who treated me badly and ended badly. I’ve had two back to back difficult pregnancies preceded by a miscarriage but as of now I literally have nothing to complain about but I feel f#cking awful.

I would like to sleep, I mean like just sleep and wake up when I feel better. I wake every morning with a pit in my stomach, because upon waking I normally feel okay but it’s like within half an hour my serotonin switches off like a light and I feel overwhelmed, like everything is an uphill battle that I just don’t want to do.

Although I don’t have any intention, I constantly have thoughts of ending it all (I wouldn’t do that to my kids especially since my oldest sons bio dad recently attempted and ended up with a brain injury but surviving). I told my husband last night about my thoughts and he just sighed and said “great” and hasn’t spoken to me about it since. I don’t know what to do but i desperately don’t want to feel like this anymore.

I’m a 30M and I’ve felt stuck for the last 15 years. My gaming addiction really messed me up, and now I don't even get happy about that and just rot in bed when I have free time. I have almost no life experiences compared to peers. My self-esteems been the worst ever. I've been overweight all my life and in the last 8 years or so lost a good bit of hair, like why the hell am I balding when my dad, grandfathers and everyone close to me aren't?! It's infuriating especially when my dad keeps saying ohh its all good looks don't matter you're fine when he is the most vain person ever and gets manicures/is basically a metrosexual.

I’ve never dated and my dating app profile is terrible, so that doesn’t help. At work, I get overwhelmed and ended up getting fired from my last job. I just started a new one (thankfully) but I’m struggling to catch up because I keep shutting down and sleeping during the day. I’m just doing the bare minimum, and it feels awful.

Lately, I’ve become obsessed with my roommate probably because its the most interaction I've had with a woman of late. She sees me as her “gay best friend” and talks about her crush a lot. Sometimes she can be emotionally manipulative—like the time I didn’t drop her off at the airport and she threw a fit. I put up with a lot because she’s autistic and has ADD.

I know I should move on, but it’s hard. We chat a lot, but I notice she takes forever to respond while she’s always talking to her crush. It stings, especially since he’s fit and has his life together. He's in a relationship and likely would never want to actually date my roommate so I suppose in a sense we are similar falling for people that won't ever return affection. My other roommate and good friend thinks she’s narcissistic, and while I see it, I still focus on her good side.

I used to spiral when trying to lose weight or focus on work, but now it’s worse since I spend so much time with her and barely do anything at my job. I keep holding on to hope while feeling miserable. I’ve been on SSRIs before, which helped my mood but didn’t give me any motivation. I’d end up sleeping until 5 PM on weekends and napping while working from home.

Hi I don't know if anyone has any advice but I feel like a complete loser I'm 26 and still living with my mum, I have a job but I just feel so empty all I look forward too is the weekend when I can join my roleplay group.

But all I keep thinking about is that I need to leave my job or is this all life is just work, work, work till I'm dead.

I have a lot of issues in my life. I'm in my late 20's and I have health, financial, career, friends and girlfriend problems that eat away at me everyday. Please be kind, I don't know the best way to format this and I have a lot of story here...

I recently got demoted due to underperformance. Prior to the demotion I was living paycheck to paycheck while racking up $12,000 of cc debt this year. The sole reason I have two cars was because the job I had before the demotion required a lot of travel and the 2nd vehicle was a hybrid. Now I make less money and have the same expenses. I'm past due on one car payment already, I have my mortgage due in 9 days, I have a few thousand dollars of dental bills and a hefty speeding ticket due this month.

As I mentioned the dental bills, I have an abundance of very costly future dental work needed. My dental insurance through my job caps out early. Two weeks ago I had the entire left side of my face swollen due to an infection from a tooth the Dentist advised me to pull immediately, two months ago, but I can't afford it. I was in so much pain I couldn't sleep. I've suffered from sleep stopping tooth pain 2-3 times per year for the last 3 years.

It'll be my 1 year this month for my relationship. She is one of the smartest people I've ever met. She is wonderful to be around.... when she wants to be. The little things she does for me in our daily life still surprise me. When things are good, and we are together, I never want to leave her side. But things are never as they seem. She is my favorite person, but I am no longer her's. One day she is all over me telling me how much she loves me and how sweet I am and special to her. The next day, she could care less I feel sad. The day before she hugs me like the world is ending and today she "I don't care about you". I think about her all the time. I have never felt this type of way before. I love her but she doesn't want me anymore. I can feel it. I should probably leave her, but I can't. On my hardest days she is there to hold me. She makes me so happy but so sad because I know these are all signs for the end. I just can't let go.

It's 2:40am, I have work at 6am. I feel so sad I couldn't fall asleep tonight. I cried, I screamed in my house alone and now I'm writing this. I am gonna pull an all nighter and go get ready for work now.

I’m sad and I like blueberries. I’m numb and I just want to feel something. But I haven’t felt this urge in years.

I won’t relapse.

I won’t relapse.

I won’t relapse.

Don’t read this and be sad and think, “How sad, how tragic, that this person posted into the void so determined to not relapse only to fall short in the end.” As if just writing this is me setting it in stone.

Because I won’t relapse.

If I want to feel something I’ll watch a funny show. I’ll eat a sandwich with yummy goat cheese and blueberries. Heck I’ll even just go get high again.

But I will not relapse.

Not while I share a bed with someone. Not while my puppy hasn’t been neutered yet. Not a week before midterms. Not now. Not ever.

I will not relapse.

The details are in my last post but I just really need someone to talk to, I feel so alone

NSFW for TW just in case i guess idk

Basically, I planned for three months to kill myself - ended up trying to slit my wrist last night. It didn't bleed very much, and I maybe, just barely hit the next layer of skin. It was very pathetic.

Thoughts?

Sorry if this is rambly. Just need to vent. When I left college at 18 I was pretty depressed. I hadn’t studied bc though non of it mattered. I’ve been depressed since I was a little girl really, around 12 ish. Anyway. I somehow got ten grades to go to university but I had rejected all my offers bc of my stupid ideas. I thought my life would get better if I could just start working. I got a job, after moms and months of applying. It was a shitty 12 hour manuka labour job. I worked there for a while until they fired me by text. Then I applied to university again. This time I did follow though with it though. I stared my course and the same feelings from college are just flooding back. I hate it. I feel out of my depth. This time I didn’t even have any friends. Nobody. Literally nobody. I sit alone and barely understand any of the corse. Also I’m autistic so it just makes life even harder. Idk what to fo anymore. Working was too much for me. I tried , I really did but I got fired from a shitty Manual labour job. It’s shameful tbh. And now I didn’t even think I’ll be able to handle this. Idk what to do.

Depression has decided to force me through another round of the meat grinder again. My mind rapidly oscillates between severely depressed and not depressed. I'm so tired of knowing that I have the power to change my life but I have no energy to do so. I also can't tell if this is just another depression cycle or if I'm just burnt out from this environment.

Hello! I hope I’ve come to the right place. My fiancé struggles with his mental health all year round in general - he has ADHD and bipolar. But it significantly worsens as soon as September comes around. We’ve been together for almost 9 years now, and he has always struggled during Autumn / Winter months more so than Spring / Summer. He hasn’t been diagnosed with SAD, but we assume that’s what it is.

Specifically, he struggles with waking up for work in darkness (i.e. shorter days) and just rainy days all around. I don’t think he struggles with it being cold, it’s more gloomy days he struggles with.

As most partners would, I feel desperate to help him through it, but he’s very resistant to anything I try to do. He digs himself into a hole and convinces himself he just needs to sit in it until Spring comes around again. Whilst I don’t want to annoy him by offering unsolicited help, I also don’t want him to waste 50% of his life away.

We’re actually complete opposites, which makes it harder. I get really bad anxiety during summer due to the heat so, I love autumn and winter. But that means I have a hard time comprehending how he’s feeling, so I assume a lot of the advice I try to give him is just useless to him.

I really want to do what I can to support him through it, and help in any way I can whilst respecting his boundaries as it’s evident to me that he doesn’t really want to receive help. So I’m trying to figure out what I can do to make the gloomy seasons even just slightly easier for him, indirectly or from afar so he doesn’t feel suffocated by my support.

I was hoping to receive any advice on how I can best support him. He has one of those sun lights which does help him with the dark mornings, but he straight up refuses therapy or anything of the kind. So I’m at a complete loss of what I can do to make his life easier. I adore him so much and it’s so painful to see him like this. Any advice at all would be massively appreciated, whether it’s based on your own experiences of suffering from SAD or whether it’s based on your experiences of supporting someone else through it - thank you!