/r/calmhands
r/calmhands is a community based around kicking the habit of kicking compulsive habits such as nail biting and nail picking. The goal of the sub is for you to be able to share resources, photos, and accountability with a lovely community that wants to do the same. Together we got this!
Hi and welcome to r/calmhands a place where people go if they want to learn to be calmer in order to stop skin picking, nail biting, hair pulling or other nervous habits they have by examining what gets them started in the first place, trying to stop and forgiving yourself when you give in.
All healing contributions are welcome! Anger expressed at other users, off topic jokes that don't directly relate to healing, posts that are negative that don't directly relate to getting better will not be tolerated.
Here are some guidelines for this subreddit:
1)Please Block and Report trolls. It will not be tolerated.
2)Please write the words "trigger warning" or "picture trigger warning" if you are going to write graphic and descriptive details about your habit or post a graphic picture. (Possible flairs coming soon).
3)Please post your story about how you developed the habit you have and if there are any times you remember stopping yourself. You are brave for posting.
You are a human being and you are beautiful since you are alive. Everyone has weak points and makes mistakes but you can overcome them! Even with red spots, bald spots and bitten nails you are beautiful and you can do amazing things with your body!
Please post your experience with telling others about your habit, as some habits like nail biting are more “mainstream” than others like skin picking. A lot of these habits hold power because they are done in secret. Remember the people who care about you should listen if you find a good time to tell them and ask them to listen and not comment. Hopefully they will give you a hug too.
Related Communities
Compulsive Skin Picking - A forum focused on a form of OCD called Compulsive Skin Picking.
Trichsters - A forum focused on trichotillomania, or compulsive hair-pulling.
Trichotillomania - A forum focused on trichotillomania, or compulsive hair-pulling.
OCD - A forum for people with any type of OCD.
Anxiety - A forum for anxious people
FAQ*
- Why did you guys start this community?
/r/Calmhands is a community to be able to connect with other people who have the same issues you may have. We believe that it’s easier to stop a bad habit when you’re got a group to help support you along the way. Through support each other our goal is to help stop bad habits whether it’s nail biting, skin picking, hair pulling, etc.
- What are body repetitive behaviors?
Well, there are a lot. Trichotillomania and dermatillomania to name a few. Those include things like cheek biting, skin picking, nail biting, etc. These are related to OCD but are not OCD and so typically require a different type of treatment.
- Well if it isn’t OCD but related, what treatment will help?
Well there are a ton of different treatments. Things like cognitive behavioral therapy, dialectical therapy, hypnosis, NAC amino acid, etc. Here in the /r/calmhands community we focus on being your cheerleaders and the best support group we can be.
- I feel I need more help, where can I get that?
Well we have some for you. Check out our addition resosources section below, it’s an ever growing list that anyone and everyone is welcome to message the mods to help expand. In the list below each resource will be described in a bit more detail.
Additional Resources
The TLC Foundation for Body Focused Repetitive Behaviors (www.BFRB.org) is the major US organization that funds research for a cure, hosts training sessions for treatment professionals, and provides support for the community. They also host an annual conference and have a listing of hair salons and therapists on their website. It was started in the 90s by a hair puller, Christina Pearson.
Heart & Soul Academy (https://hasacademy.org/) - Christina Pearson now runs Heart & Soul. She has focused more on integrative health strategies and how they can help us all heal. They hold an annual retreat.
www.CanadianBFRB.org is a Canadian-based org primarily focused on building awareness and supporting the community. Their blog has many useful tips. This is volunteer run. Please reach out if you want to help them!
www.PickingMe.org is a foundation started by a compulsive skin picker for compulsive skin pickers. Their goal is to build awareness through outreach to treatment professionals. They also provide support to support groups.
/r/calmhands
55,630 Subscribers
Sleep Picking/Peeling
After a lifetime of anxiety and depression, and dealing with this horrible habit, - I'd managed to beat the daytime/conscious actions, but I'd kept getting knocked back by the things that happened when I was asleep. Waking up without nails has been so disheartening. Ironically, the fix was really simple, - just pairs of simple thin white hand gloves. The kinds that you might use to seal in hand cream or use for eczema.
After a week, it's been consistent growth and recovery. If you're struggling with the unconscious side of this habit, I'm going to recommend trying gloves, day or night if you can manage them. They've worked so well for me. Keep the faith! (And a nail file close at hand!)
20:06 UTC
Something that's helped me heal my cuticles + deter cuticle biting
For me I feel like I sometimes struggle more with stopping biting my cuticles than my nails.
For a while I've been using just plain jojoba oil as a cuticle oil to try to make my nails and cuticles stronger and healthier. I just put it in glass perfume rollers I got for cheap off of ebay.
Recently I read that aloe is really good for your nails and cuticles, so I mixed in a bit of aloe gel that I harvested from my own plants (there's a lot of helpful videos on youtube for tips on how to harvest aloe gel) and one major benefit I found is that aloe tastes truly awful.
So not only has it been helping a lot with making my cuticles and nails stronger and healthier, but the downright horrible taste of aloe has also helped with deterring my cuticle biting. Sharing in the hopes that this can help others too.
16:25 UTC
Paronychia won't heal
So I have had a case of paronychia on my right thumb now for fully about a month. I popped it last month and drained what I thought was everything out, went to docs and had 10 days of flucloxacillin which seemed to just keep it at a standstill. It only slightly hurts, only when I press the side but the redness is still present and swelling still present slightly.
I don't know if its just the skin taking ages to heal or it's not all fully gone? I have now been prescribed ocumont ointment to apply to try instead of more oral antibiotics but I am not sure if it's something to be concerned about. Docs said yesterday that it doesn't look like there is a present cyst or area to pop it, hence why they gave me topical antibiotics.
I'm super worried about it though as I know infections shouldn't be taken lightly and just concerned that it very much is still there. How long does it usually take to heal?
12:17 UTC
Cuticle oil pen but for thicker moisturiser products?
I recently got a cuticle oil pen that I really like since it's discreet and easy to use/carry around. I also use Aquaphor for my harder/smoother finger skin; however, it looks like pens for thicker ointments don't exist. Does anyone know of any similar easy application products that might work for Aquaphor? I don't mind if I have to modify it or refill it often. Thank you!
04:03 UTC