Hi all!

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Probably, someone who hasn't put his live together shouldn't really investigate the following topic.

I am feeling a sort of guilty writing this because of the burdain that these thoughts have placed on me, but I don't thing I would get better help eslware.

All in all, Jordan Peterson has stated: "The truth will set you free".

Also, I want to mention, that I am a great fan of his and see no reason to stop being one.

So, a little bit of back story. I was struggling with depression at the september, that was induced, although not caused by the COVID. With the work of Jordan Peterson and his emphasis on heroism, kindness and morality, I managed to find a mening in life. Recently I've stumbled across the channel "Jung to live by" and some of the videos that contridicts Jordan Peterson's teachings.

I am afraid that they are right. I have nothing to object to them except that Jordan's depression and illness was immunological and medically induced, which still does not make them wrong conceptually. They also state that Peterson and Jung are like that because they are, basically, wrecked.

e.g.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pSM4nZ8zQro

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XU-5k6zfSc8&t=722s

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-JH08YwZo7Q&t=414s

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_Jzn7KApk4k&t=1867s

And mainly (You can watch only this one to understand me)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qdvbow8-WHM&t=1594s

After that one I wrote the following comment (they havent replied to it yet) that summarizes my problem pretty well.

Thank you for the video.

From it and other I can dry the conclusions, that there is no God, no supreme meaning, no independent archetypes. Also that philosophy doesn't matter and it is all about the instincts. We are just flesh, basically.

On this point I feel nihilistic. Nothing seems meaningful for me, as all that I can do is instinct driven and will disappear after I am deceased. Caring about other people also seems pointless as now it is hard to see others not as reactive animals. The same thing is with morality.

And also I am frustrated about psychology, because now I see it to be not about the being, but about animality. But before I was considering going to study as a clinician myself. Now I don't even want to discuss it with my friends and family anymore.

It seems to me that depression is coming back in the strongest form. What do I do? What to live for? The world used to seem meaningful for me through the religious perspective. Now it is just meh..

I see less in less point in avoiding to surrender to my instincts. When I imagine what my life could be like if I do so, it feels much more tranquil. It seems to me that I can really drop some of my burden and that it contridicts some of my instincts. I have a really strong temptation to do so, and I don't quite understand what stops me from doing so.

But the same thing that drives me towards the Christianity rejects that idea. I don't feel like I can be "happy" and be gould enough of a person.

I wanted to attend to church. I was interested in humanities, especially philosophy. I was interested in psychology. It seems meaningless now.

Maybe, I can reconsile these two views?

What do I do? Please, help.

p.s. there is also a post I've left in r/Jung that can clarify my stances.

I don't want to get rid of my neurosis. Is it ok?

I don't want to get rid of my neurosis.

I like to suffer as long as it feels meaningful.

These are the reasons, probably, why I don't like gestalt therapy, CBT or Jung to live by channel. My family members and, what is most important, my closest beloved friend suffer psychologically. My friend even has a severe CPTSD. I feel guilty and ashamed imaging myself being happy in that situation. I am also compromised with lots of sin, so I don't feel like I deserve neurosis-free life. I am aware of how people all over the world suffer unjustly.

Why is that? What should I do? I am deeply afraid, that my suffering is meaningless and these are just my complexes defending themselves. Probably, I wouldn't like to swallow a magic pill that all the sudden will make me free of them.

I have a sense, that the proper way of dealing with all of the psychological problems is outgrowing, not curing. Thus it has to be painful.

Is the doctrine that life is suffering right? Psychologists from "Jung to live by" say otherwise

Thanks

Thank you everyone.

basically want to be a vagabond but need to find a career to pay my living off. i feel like i am a burden on my parents. im 19. i feel awful rn. i am in college. but i hate it here. i feel so unbelonged. i wanna drop out. i am good at writing stuff but.... i want this life to be taken away. too much suffering.

One of the biggest things that's stuck with me about Peterson's work is his claim that "The Right needs the Left like a man needs a wife". That core principle of integration and synthesis of the Shadow has been driving my thinking for the past 3 or 4 years and I've been trying to figure out how to actually live it out.

I feel like almost all of our institutions and communities are "siloing" in a certain sense, and integration of important outside ideas, as well as genuine good-faith conversation, are dying a slow painful death. I noticed it on a political level, and that was fun to begin to poke fun at, but recently I started to see the same patterns take root in my own house--my family wouldn't talk to each other. They were beginning to avoid conversation and seeing each other whenever possible. I started to fall into the same avoidant patterns. Something is obviously wrong, and it appears to be seeping through reality on every level.

I decided to start working on "cleaning my own room" so to speak, and attempting to have some conversations with people I didn't agree with on a youtube channel, so people could come along, learn from my mistakes, and help me learn from them too by pointing them out.

I just posted my 3rd conversation on the channel and it's with a recent friend of mine, Professor Ken Paradis of Wilfred Laurier in Brantford Ontario. He's an open and compassionate guy, but definitely leans a lot more to the left than I do. He was kind enough to sit down more than once with me to talk about some social issues, philosophy, literary theory, and political ideas. The link below is to our most recent conversation, and we got into the thick of the weeds on it. We had a couple uncomfortable moments of talking past each other and trying to reconcile genuinely dissonant stories about reality, but in the end, I felt like it was an important and meaningful step towards working on some of these problems.

https://youtu.be/hWUhAYJ-K6k?t=304

If this project sounds interesting to you, I'd really appreciate any feedback or advice or support you can give me. Working through difficult disagreements and battling the echo chamber feels like a really deeply meaningful thing to me, and I'd appreciate anyone who feels the same way joining into the conversation. I do reference Peterson's ideas fairly often, though it's not a strickly "Jordan Peterson Themed" project.

Does every external sort require an additional disk for the merging of runs ?

I have recently had a terrible flu and I think it may have changed my life for the better. So I got the flu and spent the first 5 days in bed, too sick to get up, to eat, to sleep, to smoke weed (I was a heavy pot smoker), to watch tv, everything. I think I only ate a few apples and some chicken soup. The next about 5-7 days as the physical symptoms (coughing, puking, headaches; just to name the worst if them) started to subside I felt an overwhelming force of depression, sadness and fatigue. More acutely than ever. (And I had had a rough couple of years before that.) So I decided to make a change, I began to take better care of myself. I cut back my smoking about 95% (out of necessity because of the cough) and began eating probiotics and taking vitamins. One night I had a long talk with some friends and we shared old stories that made me laugh harder than I had in a long time. I woke up the next morning a new me. I was happier and more energetic. It's been about 5 days of feeling this way as I write this right now and I want to keep up this momentum. I was talking to a friend today and he convinced me to get a gym membership, I am more motivated than ever and will go tomorrow to do it because it's my day off. I really feel like I'm on the right path and have found the real me, I've been more honest and open with my feelings in the last 5 days. I've been more personable and confident. I want to share this success with everyone I can, and show them that anyone can be happy if they put their minds to it. There will always be trials and times of sadness in everyone life but it doesn't have to last for ever. In conclusion its seems to me that this happiness won't last forever either but you will know when you are on the right path and when you are keep going, it gets exponentially better. Don't underestimate the power of taking care of yourself and there is always a silver lining.

So now I've joined a martial arts gym and in addition to boxing I'm also learning Muay Thai.

But what's cool is I got some of my friends and neighbours involved and we all learn together in my building's gym!

I first came across JBP in the months after my wife died and I had a 3 year old to raise. So it was a good time to hear some encouragement to take responsibility. I took a few months off work and then went back to university for computer science. It's going great and I'm having a good time.

Telling the truth has been most revolutionary in my life. It's hard to articulate why, but I'm much happier now. JBP has said before that you shouldn't say things that make you feel weak. I didn't get it right away, but I think I do now. I feel stronger and better when I don't lie, even in the smallest way. I think more clearly, not having to concern myself so much with how I'll be perceived for my opinion. I don't exaggerate and overstate my case, so my opinion is generally received better than if I really tried to hammer my point home by any means necessary. People seem to take me more seriously when I talk or suggest things because the things I do say are better. I do keep silent on more issues, or maybe I just offer questions rather than attempting answers.

Being honest means I have to admit that there are a lot of things I don't know. Like politics. Everyone has a political opinion these days and you all know how intense those can get. I'm less likely to put forward an opinion based on a headline or article I read because, face it, it's really hard to know the truth about what's going on in politics. I identify a lot less with any political party now and that frees me up to support or criticize more honestly. I don't have a team to support, except my town, province, country.

Relationships are easier, better, more straightforward. I really do care for my friends so honestly expressing that is easier. And then if I offer criticism, it's received better. I feel more authentic, and I think other people perceive that too.

And once I was committed to honesty, I started acting better in a lot of ways. If I'm going to tell the truth about what I did, I'm more likely to act in a way that I'm not tempted to lie about. So I'm "being" more honest in more ways than just speaking.

I could say more, and maybe I will later, but what about you guys? What's changed in your life?

I recently revisited this video and thought some of you here might enjoy this wise, practical advice. You'll notice the resonance with Petersons message on why being wrong is important and recognise the quote, "anything worth doing is worth doing badly."

https://youtu.be/iibgCYQTXCs

Do you have fitness goals? Anyone here using myfitnesspal.com?

If you are and you want to add me go ahead: https://www.myfitnesspal.com/profile/ulyssesjasonnewcomb

I posted this over at r/JordanPeterson before I knew this sub existed, maybe this is a better place for it.

I’m 30 and my whole life my family have individually and as a unit been living “life lies.” After a series of revelatory interactions I told them I needed to take some time away from talking which really freaked them out. I tried both phone conversations and meeting up in person (we live pretty far apart) expressing my desire to confront issues that have never been acknowledged and move forward in genuine and honest relationship. They do not seem interested in proceeding honestly, rather they want to pull me back into a pathological relationship and/or write me off as crazy/bad. Through the course of trying to sort things out they’ve accused me of no longer being myself, being brainwashed by my partner, and of being purposefully malicious. Their stance seems to be that everything was perfectly fine until I invented issues out of thin air.

Over nine months I wrote a long (over 30 pages), thoughtful letter that was frank but in no way petty or purposefully hurtful. I didn’t dig into resentments of the past but tried to lay the groundwork for how to transition into genuine adult relationship. I came clean about my role in perpetuating our shared life lie and the ways in which I hadn't been honest with them. I worked hard to be sure every word was true from my perspective, putting it all out on the table, and giving them the opportunity to respond in kind. It’s been three months and I haven’t even gotten an acknowledgement that they received it let alone a response. It’s been a huge weight off not being in contact with them, I feel like I am finally learning how to be an adult unencumbered by neurotic relationship with them. I’m starting to feel like I should fully close the mental door to potential reconciliation and move on with my life without them. Has anyone else had an experience like this trying to sort out their family?

What does everyone want to accomplish in 2019?

A simple way we can all help the world is to significantly help 3 people every so often (could be daily or weekly etc).

The idea is that if the good deed impacts them enough then they will be truly grateful.

You ask them to share that gratitude by “paying it forward” and helping out 3 people themselves.

Even if only a few people pay it forward, it will grow exponentially.

In the most optimistic circumstances that’s tens of thousands of people helped in just 10 days!

What do you think?

Even though I started this sub, I haven't really been active in it, so apologies ahead of time. I'm really glad there are almost 1,500 of you!

I wanted to take a moment and remark on how good it feels to contribute to something that (1) is larger than yourself and (2) you feel is worthwhile. This isn't a brag session or anything like that, I'm only sharing in the hopes that if you're reading and haven't yet found that Larger Thing.

My uncle is very depressed. He's been self-employed for as long as I've known him, and has tried his hand at various businesses but they have all failed. His wife is a hoarder, and he has a new grandkid that can't come over because his house is so disgusting. He just closed his last business - a restaurant - and we're worried he could be veering close to suicidal thoughts.

A year ago he told me about an app idea that he had. Even though he's been an unsuccessful entrepreneur, this idea actually has some merit. About a week ago I decided to start working on it (I'm a software engineer), in the hopes that I can have a prototype ready to surprise him as a Christmas gift.

I've never worked as hard as I have in the past week. I've literally spent every waking moment either furiously working on it or thinking about it. I don't feel the need to over-eat, I don't feel the need to smoke weed, I don't feel the need to play video games. I just want to work on this one single thing.

It feels absolutely amazing, and even though I'm bone tired, I couldn't be happier. I just wanted to share this in case you're struggling with motivation. Not sure if it can help anyone, but I hope it does.

I have one major goal currently: get a job as a senior programmer at Amazon, Apple, or possibly Google.

I've got some minor secondary goals: quit caffeine, incorporate fasting, get back into cold showers, but they are pretty minor compared to the first one.

How about everyone else here?

# My personality Type:

Agreeableness 88th { Compassion 88th | Politeness 81st }

Conscientiousness 59th { Industriousness 77th | Orderliness 36th}

Extraversion 22nd { Enthusiasm 21st | Assertiveness 31st }

Neuroticism 42nd { Withdrawal 47th | Volatility 38th }

Openness to Experience 95th { Intellect 92nd | Openness 90th }

​

I am a musician and I've set the highest goal for myself of creating a legacy in a body of work that points to the utility of music as a tool for transcendence.

But nobody cares. The biggest audience I've played for is about 30 people, mostly friends and friends of friends. Youtube analytics tell the story of very few people finding this music. Those that do tune out very quickly. The music I make requires patience to listen to as it is long form composition. It isn't entertainment. There's no payoff at the 3 minute mark, let alone the 5-10 second mark which is about when people tune out of songs these days. Pieces I compose with my bandmates average 10-15 minutes in length. As such, this music doesn't fit any pre-existing commercial models.

I'm lonely as I toil in obscurity. This music is the most beautiful and valuable thing I can conceive of to produce. But it doesn't have an audience, nearly no feedback mechanism. This is becoming increasingly difficult as I grow older (now I'm 40 years old) to not experience this as a total rejection of the most valuable gift I can produce. And possibly as an indication that I've gone about things completely the wrong way. I'm losing quite a bit of money pursuing this calling due to it not (apparently) having value in the marketplace. I've followed the many suggestions of friends that are marketing experts and the needle hasn't moved. It's been over 3 years of this specific project (and 25 years of making music in general) and not only has the needle not moved in the direction of progress, our audience has gotten smaller.

My heart hurts and I don't know what to do going forward except continue trying which us a strange feeling. What if my calling, my guiding vision ends up harming may future? I have no retirement plan because I don't make enough money to both pursue music at a high level and save for retirement. I can't afford to buy property for instance. I don't know how my life is going to end up. I do know that I can't not pursue this calling because I tried that in the past and I die inside when I didn't try. Seems like a damned if you do damned if you don't situation. I don't know, I may be wrong.

Just hoping to bounce ideas off of some smart people.

Hence the question in the title of this post.

..and the key to learning to speak the truth.

https://youtu.be/4LuPCAh9FCc

My younger brother is turning 24yo & I'm wondering if anyone may have any practical gift ideas for a young male his age.

I've given him JBP's '12 Rules', and I would like to give him a gift that helps further his personal development.

I highly doubt he will read any books i give him, so I was wondering if anybody else may have any ideas? Thanks in advance!

The famous lecture.

After thinking about this, I've made a list of the actionable things that I am actively working on:

1. Study computer graphics everyday - i.e. aim to be really good at my job
2. Donate blood/plasma/platelets as often as possible (4 times this year so far). If I wasn't doing this I would probably volunteer in some fashion.
3. Behave as in Dale Carnegie's famous book. Smiling more, listening more, being genuinely interested in other people. It just brightens everyone's day if I act better.

Anyone have similar ponderings?