We want a baby so bad and my husband is ready to try again this next cycle but it’s only been a little over a week and a half since the loss. It was a chemical, and I didn’t know I was pregnant until I lost it.

It’s been such a weird grief journey. I feel like if we just try again we’ll be just be moving on to the next and I hate that feeling. At the same time, I don’t want to wait because I’ve been wanting this for so long. Why does this have to be so confusing????

I found out a few days ago that I was having our second CP after IVF (5w) I of course was sad but more angry more than anything. We met with our RE and came up with a plan for next time and as stressed and worried as I was, I felt somewhat hopeful.

I started bleeding 2 days ago but nothing crazy yet. Then last night I had some strong cramps and felt the need to use the bathroom. After standing up I could feel the blood beginning to run down my leg. When I made it to the toilet, a clot the size of my full hand came out of me with parts that looked fleshy. I literally lost my breath while seeing it as I don’t remember seeing something like this after our first CP. My wife was in the shower at the time and immediately came out and just held me as I sobbed. I felt crazy but I kept looking down at it and when my wife left the bathroom to get dressed, I even tried to take a q-tip to it to see if I could even identify the embryo/sac. My wife came back in and immediately flushed the toilet in an effort to help calm me down and try to protect me. I just fell to the floor and let out the most horrifying cry. She never saw it herself (as I was seated the whole time) because honestly I knew it would wreck her.

Now I feel absolutely numb and traumatized. I can’t stop thinking about how it passed and how my second baby is just gone. I don’t even know what I’m looking for with this post, I guess someone to just reassure me that I’m not a nut case. I don’t know where to even go from here because the sadness just feels insurmountable right now.

Can anyone relate? Truly would never wish this upon my worst enemy ❤️‍🩹

Hi, i just want to hear what others think of this. I was supposed to have my period last January 11, I didn’t bleed until now. I did yuzpe method January 13 cuz a friend of mine said it may work, so I took the risk then I continued drinking the birth control pills. I took pregnancy test January 14, 19, 25 and all came back negative. This Wednesday January 29, I had a brown-ish discharge that turned into a dark brown the next day until it became red at night which means I’m bleeding after 21 days of late period, but it’s a light bleeding. I put on a pad then when I wake up the pad was all soaked up and I had a very bad cramping that it made it super hard for me to stay asleep. Then around 3 pm, I went to the bathroom and saw this unusual blood clot that i’ve never had before, while I was sitting on the bathroom floor another clot came out, it’s a huge clot with white tissue. Now the bleeding is light again. I’m wondering if I had a miscarriage, is it because of the birth control, or am I having my period? Please share advices if some of u experienced the same thing. Thank you!

Yesterday I went through surgical management for my missed miscarriage and thought I’d share my experience for anyone else in UK as a lot of posts seem to be from US.

From the beginning: We went for a scan Saturday 25/01, I was expecting to be between 7-8 weeks but unsure exactly due to longer cycle. Straight away I could tell something was wrong, baby didn’t look like what I had seen of other scans at this gestation and I couldn’t see a flicker, after a couple of minutes I asked where is the heartbeat and the dr said I’m just trying to find it, my heart sank. After a few more minutes of doctor trying to find the heartbeat he confirmed there was no fetal heartbeat. Baby was measuring 7w2d so quite a recent event. I had noticed my sickness and nausea lessen Thursday and Friday. Dr said I may start to pass naturally but ring epac if that doesn’t occur.

By Tuesday I couldn’t cope with the fact I was carrying my dead baby and called epac and spoke with the most amazing midwife. I felt validated and so cared for from just a phone call and she managed to get me in that afternoon for confirmation scan and discuss options. We got there 20 mins early and she came and found us straight away. We had the scan and she said it does look like there are some abnormalities from how baby looks and asked if we wanted to see and have another photo printed. Again, she approached every step with such compassion. Here she confirmed diagnosis of missed miscarriage. We then discussed options and from my own research (on this thread mostly) I knew my preference was surgical management due to less pain and trauma, I didn’t want to be on my own if I naturally passed them and have to see them. Midwife again validated my concerns and spoke to me about each option when I confirmed SM was what I wanted. I’m not sure if all hospitals do this but we’re were given a free parking slip so we didn’t need to pay for any of our trips to the hospital. She walked us up to gynae to speak to a dr, this was the hardest bit as was then in a waiting room with pregnant people. This was just to sign consent forms.

Wednesday I got a call booking me in for surgery Monday, Thursday I got a call asking if I’d like a cancellation for Friday which I accepted.

The procedure was done on an outpatient ward and I got my own room, I think there was another lady going through the same who also got her own room. The nurses were lovely and did whatever they could for us. The consultant and anaesthetist came round before hand to explain what would happen and two hour after checking in I was walked down to theatre where it was so cold! I had a little cry when I got there knowing me and baby would be separated now, the nurse held my hand until I went under. I went to sleep staring at animal sticker on the ceiling and woke up in recovery with no pain at all. I had a couple of cups of water then taken back to the ward where we were given food and drink then discharged after I had peed and spoken to the doctor that carried out the procedure. All in all we were there from 12:15 - 17:30.

I haven’t had much bleeding yet, just light pink spotting and mild period cramps so I feel I made the right decision in surgical management.

I asked about what they do with baby and was told all babies remains are sent to a lab to test for molar pregnancy then can either be cremated with other babies or if I would like baby to be returned to me that is also possible. I’ve decided that’s my preference so that they are always with me, I will plant in a pot with a rose.

This has been the most heartbreaking week of my life, you know the odds as many like to remind you but you don’t believe you’ll be 1 in 4. Now time to heal and hope that one day my rainbow baby will be sent to me by my forever blueberry baby 🤍

I hope this post gives someone going through this some information to help them how many other posts did with me. I’m sorry you’re going through this and I’m so sorry for your loss. Sending you so much love ❤️

Hello 2 days ago i take mife, 3 hours ago i took 4 cytotec vaginally. I started bleeding after 1 hour.. But now i have high fever 38.2 °c can miso cause this? I also took ibuprofen before miso. Should i be concerned?

I’ve always wanted a baby. I had one and it was a total miracle. I have never been happier. My miscarriage, aside from the heartbreaking loss, revealed an underlying infection I had. It was caught early, but I am still at risk of infertility. At just 19, I may lose my dream. I did everything right. I tried. I’m sorry.

I had an early miscarriage at the end of December with no medical intervention. I have started to track my cycle and I seem to be having a ‘period’ every 2 weeks. I was never regular but never had periods this close together. My last period started with spotting and has continued to get heavier which is a big trigger for me. Will my cycle return to normal or is this it?

Hi all would be very grateful for some advice from people who may have been in this situation. I had a MMC found at 8w4 days - the baby stopped growing a week before. Took Mife/Miso a week later and passed what I thought was everything including gestational sac that evening. Bled heavily for 5 days then completely stopped. I woke from sleep last night with painful cramps and passed some dark red clots on the toilet. My pregnancy tests are still showing positive at day 10 - unchanged from day 7. I can’t speak to anyone at the EPU until Monday so just looking for any advice. Very worried this is RPOC and not normal…

My husband and I have been REALLY trying for a baby these past 6ish months (tracking period, ovulation, sex dates). I’ve had two miscarriages in 5 months and am really struggling with the thought of never having a child.

I am 32 and he’s 36 so we are running out of time imo. I’m trying to stay positive but it’s so hard when literally everyone around you already has kids and you feel like you waited too long to try.

How do you keep trying and what tools have actually helped you? I cant afford IVF and am desperate to just get some guidance and tools from people who can relate to me instead of just sending condolences.

I had a blood draw during my miscarriage and my blood was so thick (and very dark coloured) they had trouble getting it into the test tubes. It took ages to fill and even the nurse commented on it. Has anyone else experienced this?
For context, this is my second early miscarriage, I’d drank lots of water so wasn’t dehydrated.

I had a mmc and the whole process, I would say, went smooth for the situation. My Dr was super supportive and my husband and family also. And I can’t really complain. For the most part Im super optimistic and grateful and I don’t know if it’s my way of coping that I try to see the good in everything.

But it’s hard. I didn’t realize I would have triggers so early. I will be a 100% ok. And I see something and it makes me break down. Today I saw a pregnancy test commercial and I just broke down. I guess I’m venting more than anything.

Have yall done anything that helps with coping?

This is a rhetorical question. I know we are all entitled to our own grievances but I feel like my grief is too much. My partner seems to have moved on already and I can’t help but feel like I should too, but it still pains me. It does indeed get better but I still get triggered and emotional. I lost mine at 6 weeks, an empty ges sac at that, my first miscarriage. It’s absurd to be in such a state for 5 months when I only knew about the pregnancy for 2 weeks, right? Can’t help but feel like my grief is less valid.

Anybody else feeling the same? How are you coping?

So I had an early miscarriage in May 2021. I was about 7-8 weeks along.

9 months later, around my due date, I started having this tingly feeling in my nipples and realised I was producing a little bit of milk.

It progressively increased, and I, knowing little about this, expressed it whenever I felt that ‘pressure’ growing too much. I expected it to stop on it’s own but it never did, and now it’s been 3 years and it still doesn’t stop. Even if I go a while without expressing it.

Has anyone had a similar experience or heard of one, producing milk around the due date after a miscarriage? And any tips on how to make it stop?

Thanks in advance ☺️

I had my second miscarriage confirmed this week. My baby was supposed to be 16 weeks, had a low risk NIPT, and was wiggling around and seemed so healthy during our Nuchal Test scan, which also came back clear. I had a D&E days later. I don’t really know what the point of this post is, except that I am feeling crushed by this loss. My doctor says it’s likely we will never have answers as to why this happened. I got pregnant with this baby about two months after a prior loss in August at 8 weeks. I thought we were going to be okay this time, as we met all the milestones we didn’t get the chance to the last time around (a heartbeat, clear genetic testing, etc). I don’t know how to cope right now. All I can think about is the moment my OB put the ultrasound wand on after she couldn’t find the heartbeat on Doppler. She went so quiet and her face was so serious. I don’t know how to tell the people we announced to. I don’t know how I can ever feel normal again. I don’t know how to deal with the fact that my baby is no longer with me. We so badly wanted this baby. If there’s anything that helped anyone in these early stages of grief, please share. I feel like I’m drowning.

Went in for my confirmation ultrasound and bloodwork yesterday and she couldn’t find a heartbeat. Baby was measuring at 8w0d, exactly where they should be. My HCG was about 26,000. I have another blood draw tomorrow. Is there any hope that I haven’t lost this baby?

I had my first miscarriage mid-December. I thought I had worked through a lot of emotions but I just found out that my husband’s sister is pregnant. I didn’t think I’d feel this triggered by the news.

I’m obviously excited for her but my first reaction was to cry. She’s younger than us and got married a year after us. We’ve been trying for a bit and I just wish we were at that next step already. I just feel like everyone is moving forward and im standing still.

We’re also going to visit some friends in a few weeks who have a baby due (via surrogacy) in March. They’ve had a long road and I’m excited for them as well. I know I have to hold space for multiple emotions but celebrating all these babies when I’ve gone through loss is a lot. How do you cope?

I lost my little one at 8 weeks 5 days after completing IVF. I’m lying here awake crying because I just seen a tik tok of someone getting a positive pregnancy test at 4 weeks and then clicking into their profile and seeing they are now nearly due. I wish I could have had that innocence and feeling. I never did , as I was told I was high risk but I never thought I would become part of the statistic they talked about.

After 8 years of waiting on those two lines , I can’t believe my little one is gone. I had so much planned.

I hope you all are okay,I wish we didn’t have to go through this.

I have to prepare my mind and body for the next pregnancy and I’m putting on a brave face each day to get there , but I’m afraid.

I'm on my 2nd pregnancy/2nd miscarriage. The dr is suggesting genetic testing. Has anyone done it? I will be kinda pissed if I spend a bunch of money for them to say we don't know or everything is normal. Jw if anyone has had these tests and if it was worth doing or not. Any info would really help me. Thanks in advance!!

Trigger warning; TTC after loss

I had a MMC- I ended up doing a D&C @ 9W because baby stopped growing at 5W 5D.

I'm 2 weeks post D&C and feel good, I was cleared by my OB to resume all activities. She told me I'm welcome to try and conceive starting now. She normally recommends after the first period post D&C as cautionary but said we could try if we wanted now.

My husband feels totally ready if I am, which honestly I feel better than I thought I would. I grieved heavily during the in-between, loss and D&C - but we're ready to continue

So Im curious, did anyone TTC right after being cleared after their D&C?

I want to start by saying I have already had two miscarriages last year so I am terribly worried I am having another one. I have no idea how far along I should be, I got my first positive on January 4th, but what I thought was my period occurred on December 23rd and lasted roughly a week. TMI.... I had heavy bleeding with blood clots as I normally would on my period so I did not think I was pregnant. However I was extremely nauseated and threw up on the morning of my positive test along with some other symptoms so l decided to take a test and it was positive.... I went to the Dr on 1/17 and HCG was only 38, then I had it tested again on 1/21 and it was only 71..... my obgyn said I very well could have miscalculated and I could be really early, well then on 1/24 (around the time my period would be) I started heavy bleeding with blood clots again, the bleeding stopped 1/29 and today 1/31 I took a pregnancy test (assuming it would be negative by now as my HCG was only 71) and it came back positive..... I called obgyn and they drew my blood and my HCG is 125. I am assuming this is not good but I really don't know what to think.... My last two miscarriages were not like this. Does anyone have any advice or similar stories?? I can't call obgyn until Monday so I'm just trying my best not to freak out with stress and anxiety.

Didn’t want to make my title 200 characters long so here’s my info & question:

I had a D&C with suction under ultrasound guidance 2 weeks + 1 day ago. I was bleeding a good amount up until yesterday (2 weeks) and it started getting lighter, though a bit heavier than spotting. Went to the dr today for my 2ish week follow-up and after telling him he said I’m all good to start resume activity/start trying again, no need to wait. I really don’t want to start bleeding again, is it really okay to resume normal sexual activity?

Other info: I was suppose to be 11-12weeks and heart stopped beating around 7-8. I bled heavily the first day and it declined until day 5 when it picked back up. I never had to change pads more than once every few hours or less. I was worried the prolonged bleeding meant remaining tissue (mostly bc I read too much) - but the dr didn’t do an ultrasound at my follow up since he said the risk of missing any tissue when it’s under ultrasound guidance is negligible.

Thank yall and I’m sorry we’re in this group together.

I just had what my dr believes was an ectopic pregnancy that resolved on its own. She’s sending me for more hcg draws to see if the levels have dropped more. Has anyone else experienced this? I thought you needed treatment for ectopic? I had a positive pregnancy test and started bleeding the next day similar to a period. They were monitoring my hcg and it was very low, then went up 12 then more than doubled and then dropped 50%. I was never over 122. I just went in today for an ultrasound and everything looked fine, my uterus lining was very thing, the dr said she’s seen this happen before. I’m no longer bleeding but still worried. I took an at home test yesterday to try and see if the levels were completely gone and it was still a faint positive.

How does Misoprostol work? And how long does it take for the bleeding to die down?

I was also wondering how long it takes to resume a period afterwards, and whether it triggers a period while you are taking it?

Thanks in advance. It’s been over a week since taking it and I’m still bleeding, not sure if that’s normal and not sure if/how to track it in my period tracker.

Hi all,

I experienced my third miscarriage yesterday. I’m so frustrated. The hospital did not genetic test the products of conception any of the times I miscarried, despite me asking. How do I move forward not knowing the cause of any of these? First was a natural miscarriage from a spontaneous pregnancy at 7 weeks. Second was a D&C after a MMC after spontaneous pregnancy at 8 weeks. Third was a D&C from a MMC at 8 weeks after a 2.5 year ttc journey and IVF across the country. 2nd and 3rd loss, we saw the heartbeat and at next appointment baby stoped growing and heartbeat was gone. I’ve had every test under the sun done. Partner has had full testing including DNA frag. I down regulated severe endo with Lupron. Followed a pretty intense immune protocol. I’m at a loss and so scared to think about trying again. Any suggestions or feedback?

Just curious if anyone has had this blood test before? Did your doctor recommend it or did you have to ask for it?

i had a blighted ovum and a missed miscarriage. the baby stopped growing at 6w but the sac was the size of a 9w. i was prescribed 2 doses of miso 800mcg to be taken 4 hours apart orally (let rest in cheek or under tongue for 30 mins). after the first dose i experienced light bleeding and cramping until about 3 hours in when i went through the worst pain of my life. the extreme cramping only lasted about 30 mins. i was really shaken up so i cant even remember if i passed anything afterwards. i took the second dose and throughout the night i had horrible cramps that would jolt me awake. the next two days were fine, heavier cramping than my periods but tolerable. it’s now been 72 hours since i first took it and im experiencing major cramping again. i have been passing large clots all day. i was wondering if its normal to be still be passing and cramping this far out?

Hi all…

Today at 12 weeks, 4 days I found out my baby has no heartbeat. According to the OB, the baby stopped growing/lost heartbeat at 9 weeks 5 days. This means it happened 3 weeks ago. This is my first pregnancy. Im 30 years old. I have had no bleeding or spotting at all. I have no pain, no cramps, nothing. No symptoms of any kind. Should I continue to wait for a natural miscarriage or should I look into a surgery? Are there any other options besides those 2?

I’m asking because if it’s been 3 weeks and I’m this far along, would it be better to have surgery? I don’t know I’m so confused and hurt and lost.

Thank you so much….

Had a D&C this morning for my 4th IVF miscarriage of a PGT normal embryo. 9 weeks but heartbeat was no longer detected a few days ago. I opted for testing the tissue. Curious if anyone did this with a “normal” embryo and found something. It would make me feel better if something was wrong vs this continuing to spontaneously happen.

I found I was pregnant in August of 2023 they assumed I was about 8 weeks along and ended up having a chemical pregnancy. My HCG levels were relatively low like 9 and below and just kept going up and down and never really went anywhere.

Once I had the chemical pregnancy we were told we didn’t have to wait for the HCG levels to come down so we tried again and still my numbers slightly elevated and never went anywhere. I finally had a doctor follow my HCG levels. The lowest it went down was a 3 finally in April of 2024 and my levels were not tested again despite the recurrent low level HCG. We tried again in October of 2024 and same thing.. my levels actually were the highest they’d ever been about a 23.3 but never went up. Finally went down to about a 6 in November 2024 and it was not followed again.. we were told we could try again and follow LH levels etc.

The issue is that my periods have been extremely abnormal since 2023s first chemical. Literally no idea if or when I’ll get my period, sometimes 29 day cycles, sometimes 33/34 day cycles. We tried anyway and I tested LH peak around Jan 17th 2 days after my period ended. I thought we would get pregnant this time only to find out my HCG levels went up to an 18 and decreased to a 16 already 72 hrs later. I’m preparing for another chemical at this point.

Has anyone had a similar experience with constant low level HCGs and trying to conceive?

I think I’m going to test my LH levels earlier in my cycle to make sure I don’t miss that window. But I worry my LH levels may be confused for HCG as I’ve heard that can happen. More so, my doctors don’t believe it’s due to retained tissue but believe my HCG levels may naturally be “higher” so above that 5 and may be why I’m showing but still no possible explanations. My doctor wants us to keep trying for the next 3 months but at this point it’s getting hard to feel happy about any + tests and starting to feel very mechanical. We’re about to be 32 this year and we were really hoping to start our little family sooner than later especially with all these complications

I miscarried at the end of November. I had been doing better lately but am having a hard time this week. I went back to the doctors office for the first time and it felt like such a traumatic experience. Seeing the ultrasound tech that told me she couldn’t find a heartbeat. Seeing all the pregnant happy people. Then at work, I’ve had two coworkers ask me if I’m pregnant or wanting more kids anytime soon. Just sad right now. :(