⚠️Trigger Warning⚠️

So, I miscarriaged my twins in two different months and years. One twin passed away on November 25th, 2017 and my other twin passed away on February 25th, 2018. My first unborn wasn't as bad but my second unborn traumatized me so bad that I always cry in the month of February and also my birthday is in February as well. That twin passed away 5 days after my birthday on the 20th of February. 😭💔👼🏼👼🏼

I found out on Friday at 10w3d that the fetus stopped growing at 8 weeks. I went to the ER as recommended by my doctor, but they couldn’t fit me in. They said they’d call me today (Monday) to schedule for tomorrow.

I called and left a message for the surgical coordinator and then called to cancel my nuchal. The surgical coordinator called back and said they had me on the schedule for Wednesday. I started crying and saying it needed to happen ASAP and I could not wait. So she called me back and said it would be today. Do not be afraid to advocate for yourself. We can ask for some consideration given what we’re going through.

Anyway, aside from the waiting, hunger, and breaking down in tears in front of multiple medical staff, it was fine. The anesthesiologist asked if I get nauseated easily and I said yes, so he gave me some extra medicine so I would wake you up ”feeling great.” And I do feel fine. Some light bleeding but no cramps or even exhaustion. I don’t feel pregnant at all anymore. I’m so relieved it’s over.

This was the best course of treatment for me. I could not bear the the thought of continuing to carry the fetus, passing the fetus at home with no timeline and a ton of pain and possibly needing a D&C afterward.

If you’re faced with the decision, I urge you to consider it. I know in these fucked up times, not everyone has that choice, but I hope you do.

I’m going to be 39 this year. I assumed I was infertile as I have never been pregnant despite my ex husband and I not using protection the entire time we were married.

Both of us were of the mindset that if it was meant to be, it would happen and had no interest in actively trying.

Had a terrible relationship a few years after the divorce and stopped dating for almost 2 years. Eased back into the dating world this year after meeting what I thought was a great man.

I ended up pregnant after 3 months together. Things didn’t work out, I miscarried a few days after the breakup at 5 weeks.

Today is the first pregnancy test I took that was negative. I’ve been sad since the miscarriage, grieving something I never thought I would want.

Now all I can think about is how maybe I do want kids but I’m running out of time and again single.

It’s bringing up a lot of suppressed feelings from childhood trauma (like I never tried to have a family because I felt I wasn’t deserving of it among other things) that I’m trying to work through while also grieving the loss of the pregnancy and loss of the relationship.

Just overwhelmed, sad and in a place mentally and emotionally I never expected to be in.

Sorry to trauma dump. I just needed a safe place.

I had a D&C for a MMC on 3/12

On 4/1 I had an unrelated procedure done where I had a negative dip stick pregnancy test

On 4/11 I had a positive home test

On 4/12 my HCG was 25

On 4/15 my HCG was 17

On 4/22 my HCG was 11

My doctor thinks I just had residual HGC from my initial mmc. I just feel really uneasy because of the negative test on 4/1. What do you think? We did BD around the right time for a positive. In the end, I know it doesn't matter but maybe we'd wait another month if it was a chemical? Ulllg. I still haven't started a period either. :/

Hi sisters, I had a miscarriage in January and felt desperate to feel heard & understood. I felt so lonely in the most devastating part of my life. But this podcast reminded me that I’m not alone. There are so many women who are willing to share their experience, and listening to their stories through the podcast made me feel hopeful. I hope this can help you too.

Miscarriage Stories with Arden Cartrette

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/miscarriage-stories-with-arden-cartrette/id1555863317

This is a special space for us. I feel comfortable sharing, and commenting with the experience that I have. Miscarriage is a lonely place, and this makes it less so.

Lots of love to you all, we got eachother, and we will get through this, ok?

Xxx

Has anybody dealt with slow rising HCG that ended in miscarriage? How long for miscarriage to start?

So, my betas started out okay, doubling every 48 hrs as hoped…. but in the past week they stopping rising appropriately - but they numbers are still rising slowly.

24 DPO: 3951

26 DPO: 4262

30 DPO: 7111

Based on these numbers we already know a miscarriage is inevitable…. But WHEN? When will my numbers stop going up and when will my body figure it out and begin to miscarry?

Anyone ever experience this?

I had mine 1 week ago, today. Bleeding like a light period since Saturday. Wondering how long it will last. Just want all of it to be over.

TW: extremely insensitive family

I got a text this morning that my cousin miscarried. she does not have the finances, mental stability, or support system to have a baby, especially from a boy she only knew for 2 months before she got pregnant. that being said, some of my family members’ reactions were “relieved” when we got the news.

how do I support her through this experience while she’s surrounded with people who believe “it’s for the best”?

Tomorrow will make 4 weeks since my D&C. Today I started bleeding so I am assuming this is my first period . Besides a little cramping and a wave of intense pelvic discomfort I had earlier I feel okay just tired & emotional . Wondering will it be worse & How was everyone’s first period after D&C ?

I had a miscarriage last year at 10w. Things have been off concerning my cycles and so when I started bleeding again two days after my period ended, I was confused but not thinking too much of it.

Just took two tests this morning (four days of light bleeding) because a google search showed that there was a chance of pregnancy.

When I tell you I was shocked. I got blood drawn to check levels and will again in two days. But this does NOT look good. A full period on schedule and then more bleeding after a two days break? Also some moderate to severe (briefly) cramping. This can’t be a good sign.

I am desperate to know if this is viable. I’m not getting my hopes too high. My first baby would have been a month old right now. I am feeling so depressed and just want to fall into the earth and let it swallow me.

Has ANYONE bled so much at 4-5weeks and kept their baby? Or am I just fooling myself.

What Kind of Loss

No it's not grief
Well it is
But it's more

It's the physical pain
It's the diapers and the pads
It's the waterfall of blood and bloody blobs
That keeps trickling for weeks,
Reminding me I'm raw

It's the "Is it over yet"
It's the endless ultrasounds
It's the pills
Or is it the surgery
Or is it continuing to bleed?

No it's not a medical issue
Well it can be
But it's more

It's the staring into space
It's being able to see the April sunshine but not to feel it
It's the tears that come out of nowhere
When I thought I was good

It's the inability to give a fuck
It's the "When will I be ok again"
It's experiencing death within my body
And not knowing how to do it
Just that I will

———

I’m now two weeks into my MMC at 9 weeks. Survived a hard morning back at the doctor’s to check if everything is out (it’s not), and wrote this afterwards.

Edited for formatting -- it was all jumbled after I pasted it from my email.

"No definitive intrauterine gestation visualized with hemorrhagic free fluid identified within the cul-de-sac. This finding could reflect a pregnancy of unknown location such as an ectopic versus a too early to characterize pregnancy versus a ruptured cyst versus early pregnancy loss. Follow-up one week ultrasound and serial beta hCGs are recommended for further evaluation." This was at the ER. My follow up at my obgyn was just hcg tests. No follow up ultrasound. My obgyn kind of brushed me off and said as long as im bleeding and hcg is going down theres no need for ultrasound. Does this mean I had an ectopic pregnancy? This was January 2023. Not asking for medical advice, I just don't know how to interpret the results. While I was at the ER the doctor said they don't know where I'm bleeding from. They ultrasounded me for like 20 minutes. They would've seen blood coming from the uterus. Or blood coming from an ectopic in the tubes or ovary? In the grand scheme of things its over a year later so it doesn't really matter I guess. Unless my anatomy is messed up and I'll keep having more "ectopics"?

Hi - I had a d&c 8 weeks ago with identical twins. It’s completely devastating. My hcg was down to 34 about a week ago. I got my first period over the weekend, but my doctor is saying we can’t move forward with the post-op testing she wants to do until my hcg is zero. My question is- has anyone gotten a period before HCG went to zero? If so, how long after the period did it take for your hcg to go to zero?

TW: description of MC, ectopic

I had an ectopic in January that ruptured, and absolutely had no intention of getting pregnant again. My partner and I have been together for 12 years and never had a scare, so not sure where the fertility came from all of the sudden, but I ended up pregnant again at the end of February.

We confirmed everything in late March, but I had had some constant bleeding and cramping so my doctor was very honest with me about how things could go given the trauma my body had just been through. I was at peace (very sad but at peace) with this and then Easter morning, I believed I had an MC.

I woke up cramping lightly, while bleeding significantly. I got up and passed a large, round clot, little larger than a half dollar.

After that, I felt like I just knew. It felt like all of the hormones and wistfulness and feelings of fullness, etc, disappeared. Maybe I’m full of it, but I knew when I was pregnant within 2 weeks. I feel like I am no longer.

That being said, when testing my betas we were surprised that they had still increased slightly. My frustration with my OB is they didn’t tell me by how much and I am not able to get scheduled for an ultrasound until 4/30, almost a month later.

I have been consistently nauseous, and I did bleed for weeks after the assumed MC. I am finally not bleeding and am slowly getting less nauseous(it comes and goes now rather than being constant)

Because my symptoms have abated some I took an HcG dip test this morning and am still popping very positive.

I guess my question is: can I be wrong? I know that scientifically of course I can be. But I just am having a hard time wrapping my head around the idea that I could feel so different and be so wrong. If I am not, has anyone experienced similar issues or had any experiences with molar pregnancies that they’d feel comfortable sharing? That is my next biggest fear as I live in a VERY not safe state for women’s health.

TL:DR- could I be wrong about my MC since my betas didn’t drop, or could it be something else?

I just went to my ob appointment and she confirmed a missed miscarriage. I want to believe my doctor knows what they’re doing but it’s hard to accept and part of me feels like it’s not real.

Two weeks ago I had an U/s at 6wk1 in the ER where the fetus measured at 5wk6 with a CRL of 2.22mm and FRH of 104. Today at 8wk1 I measures 6wk1 with a CRL of 3.9 and no FRH. I have a tilted uterus and was reading it can lead to misdiagnosis. I don’t want to get my hopes up I scheduled a d&c w/genetic testing for next Tuesday. Should I go to the ER that originally saw me again and get a second opinion.

About to go home from the hospital. Apparently I bled a ton on the table (“uterus filled up with blood five times”???) and I’m lucky I stabilized and won’t have to spend the night here. The room where I woke up had a crying newborn across the curtain- that hurt worse than anything. Nurses are angels. And my job approved beareavement leave for a week, so that’s a silver lining.

Just want to share bc I feel super sad and alone.

Reading the stories of others has given me comfort that I’m not alone during this difficult time.

I was wondering if anyone has good book recommendations that are fiction of characters dealing with miscarriage. Not looking for self help books, more stories that feel relatable and comforting. I couldn’t find anything besides self help on Google.

Thanks in advance

Had a MMC diagnosed in mid-February, long story short 2 rounds of Miso and a d&c later I got my period back earlier this month. Because of the timing of my d&c and the fact that I had already been testing negative beforehand, I ovulated fairly quickly after the d&c so I didn’t pay attention to any pain I had then and chalked it up to the d&c.

According to the ovulation strips I am ovulating now. My breasts are killing me, radiating pain off and on for a week or so. Other than an occasional twinge leading up to my periods, pre-pregnancy I never had pains like this.

Has anyone had more intense cycle/PMS/ovulation pains since having a MC? Just wondering if it’s part of my body trying to “normalize” itself.

Hey everyone hope you all are doing okay today. I got my D&C one week ago tomorrow. I’ve still been bleeding a good amount (which I know can be normal) I’m still in a good amount of pain, and the very intense pain seems to cause some very large clots to pass. Some as big if not a bit bigger than a 50 cent piece, (tmi here my apologies) the bleeding has a smell to it, not absolutely horrible but definitely not what blood smells like, or what I’ve experienced from a previous (natural) miscarriage. I’m also very cold, but still hot, with clammy feeling skin. My brain feels fuzzy if that makes sense. Anyone have an experience like this? Do I need to go get checked out? I’m worried about having an infection. Lmk what you would do in this situation, thanks for reading. Sorry if it’s all over the place, again my brain is so fuzzy. Thanks. 💜❤️‍🩹 sending you all lots of love. 🫂

I have a small retained tissue 1.4 cm which has a little bit of blood flow, it’s been three weeks since my medicated miscarriage with misoprostol. Two OBs told me to just leave the tissue and wait for my period to push it out. One of the two OBs said if it’s still there she will do a hysteroscopy to pull it out.

I’ve been nervous though to just leave it in there for risk of infection, even though both doctors said the risk is super low and not to worry. I decided to see one more OB and she told me to take misoprostol (four pills orally). I’m nervous because I don’t want to go through the pain again, but I can’t wait to be done with this ordeal and move on already.

Has anyone used miso for retained products of conception and was it effective for you? Any experience I would appreciate hearing about.

Thank you!

So I lost my first twin at week six cried like my world had ended for two weeks only to discover that I still had another baby but it wasn’t developing either. The emotions I went through no one can explain so I had an MVA on the Tuesday of the eighth week. That wasn’t the end of my misery cause the MVA was unsuccessful and I only realised that after staying a whole week with unbearable abdominal pain. Made another appointment at a bigger hospital and had a D&C on the ninth week but so far I’m drained to my last point. I’m no longer happy and now I have terrible back pain. I pray for no one to go through these complications.

I also haven’t had my period yet, but that’s not abnormal for me because I have PCOS.

TW: Miscarriage

So, unfortunately I suffered a miscarriage at just shy off 5weeks pregnant back in February. Got my period again on 24th march, about 2.5 weeks after my miscarriage bleeding stopped (this lasted about 9/10 days). To be honest, I wouldn’t have even classified it as my usual periods because it was mainly just some spotting when I wiped and lasted about 3/4 days, but I did ovulate according to OPK tests on the 7th and 8th April.

Have just had my period arrive today which is very heavy at the moment and cramping too. Been experiencing what I’m assuming is period clots - some a little stringy which quite resembled the sac i lost during my miscarriage so was taken aback by that, and others like blobs of thick blood which i did not experience during my periods prior to the miscarriage. Hoping this is just my period regulating itself now.

Is this normal? How was your period experience after MC?

It was a low moment. After spotting for a couple of days and worrying myself sick, I felt cramping and wetness in the middle of costco. I excused myself to the bathroom and saw red. I was with a few friends and had to just act normal until I could get home and tell my husband.

I was supposed to be 7 weeks from LMP, but I had a vaginal ultrasound and they couldn’t see a thing - they said my uterus was empty. I feel crazy, like I made the whole thing up. I have no idea when this pregnancy actually ended. Was it just another chemical that my body didn’t notice for weeks?

I think I had a niggling feeling something was wrong. I didn’t get my positive until very late evening 12dpo which felt a bit late. The line did darken over the next few days though. As the weeks progressed I had sore boobs and bloating but zero nausea and minimal fatigue which made me a little suspicious. I’d made it further than my chemical pregnancy last cycle, so I thought I was clear, but felt a little worried still. As soon as I saw the brown dot in my underwear I already knew it was over, though it took a further few days to see red.

I think I’m ok, the limbo was the worst and I feel some peace now knowing I’ve been looked at and it’s over. I’m frustrated more than anything because all of this takes so much time. But I’m looking to the future.

Sitting at the gyno office for my final blood draw for my HCG (hopefully went back to 0) and a lady checked in with her newborn in their car seat. I’m sitting here watching her rock the baby and they are just staring up at their mom with so much love. I just want that so badly 😭 I’m sad angry jealous frustrated and everything in between 😔 I just want to cry and crawl into bed for the rest of that day but I will be going back to work since I’m on my lunch break. Ughhhhh

Hello, it was confirmed today that it’s a missed miscarriage. I had a private scan on Saturday as I was 8 weeks pregnant but sadly our little one didn’t develop and so referred to the EPU.

I went the medical management route. I take the 2nd tablet tomorrow night. I just want to know how bad will it be?

I’ve been given pain medication. The first day of my period used to be pretty bad with heavy bleeding and cramps that I had to take strong painkillers for. Thanks everyone

I had a MC last Sunday and since my stomach has just not been right. It hurts basically all the time and is super sensitive. I figured at first it was due to my emotions, but it is still continuing. Anyone else experience the same thing?

I had an early miscarriage, a little after 6 weeks, so not many people knew about it. And the ones that did know were largely unhelpful (even though I would like to believe that was definitely not what they intended). It still hit me like a ton of bricks and I took a week off work to process the loss and cry it out. Since then, I've thought about that baby on and off but never really cried about it... until today.

I thought I was feeling okay when I woke up, so I decided to drive in to work (about an hour drive). I also thought it would keep me occupied and a little distracted. But I cried a little on the drive and now I feel sort of miserable. The day has barely started, I'm not sure what I can do to deal with the rest of it.

Will doing something special after work make it easier or tougher? I like that it's Earth Day today, there's something sort of poetic about it. What did you do on your would-be due date?