/r/MeanJokes
What the fuck do you think this is? Read the name, dumbass
Welcome to /r/MeanJokes!
Just some ground rules:
Any topic is free game, but we do not support/condone real-life discrimination of any community. Everyone is welcome here.
This is not a political subreddit. Jokes about political figures are allowed, but we are not here to let you parade your ideologies. Keep is as a joke and nothing else.
Reposts are allowed. Always will be. It is up to the community to vote on what they like and don't like, so don't be surprised if your overused joke gets buried.
Enjoy your time here, because you'll never get it back.
/r/MeanJokes
132,728 Subscribers
Dad Jokes
Hey there! If you're a fan of dad jokes and love a good laugh, check out my site! It’s packed with fun features:
Get a New Joke: Every time you need a laugh, just scroll or swipe and a fresh joke will pop up.
Save Your Faves: Found a joke you love? Save it for later and keep all your favorites in one place.
Share the Laughs: Want to share a joke with friends? You can easily share it with a tap.
Fullscreen Mode: Want a bigger view? Switch to fullscreen for a better experience.
Search Saved Jokes: You can even search your saved jokes to find that perfect one.
Cool Popup Notifications: Get notifications when you save a joke or do something cool!
If you're interested or have any questions, feel free to DM me! I’d love to hear your thoughts and chat more about it. 😊
15:41 UTC
Cuanto es la mitad de 18 menos 9?
01:32 UTC
Conservatives and Liberals both want the same thing
Gender reveal parties for seven year olds
06:43 UTC
Orphan jokes
Whats the difference between an escaped prisoner and an orphan? The prisoner is wanted.
What’s an orphans favourite flower? Self-raising
What does an orphan call a family photo? A Wishlist.
01:44 UTC
This site can't handle mean jokes should be called softassjokes
04:38 UTC
When does a man’s hair start to turn white?
When his semen can’t find any other direction to release.
14:16 UTC
From Belhop, to Bebop, to Hiphop
to OUCH STOP!
rAPE!
03:44 UTC
What’s the difference between a priest and woody from Toy Story?
Woody goes soft when a kid enters the room
01:59 UTC
What did Grace Kelly have that Natalie Wood could have used?
A good stroke.
22:05 UTC
How do you prepare your son for Catholic school?
Read them "Little Boy Blue."
^(Works better verbally)
23:07 UTC
How hard is it to spot the blind guy in a nudist colony?
It’s not hard.
16:16 UTC
If i had a dollar for every gender...
... I'd have $1.73
03:08 UTC
With cuts to education funding, America is looking to model schools after the Russian army.
When the student in front of you gets shot, pick up their book.
16:43 UTC
I’m not saying I hate you but if you were on fire and I had water…
I would drink it
06:28 UTC
What's the difference between an incompetently rolled joint and Kamala Harris?
One of them's a kak blunt, the other...
21:43 UTC
What are the best vulgar names to offend someone with?
13:30 UTC
Did you hear about the guy who couldn’t spell?
He spent a night in a warehouse.
00:52 UTC
What’s the difference between anxiety and panic?
Anxiety is the 1st time you can’t do it a 2nd time
Panic is the 2nd time you can’t do it the 1st time.
00:36 UTC
My girlfriend told me that my dick is too small
I said it's for kids
07:34 UTC
Did you hear that the San Diego Chargers hired two nuns and a prostitute in the off season?
They needed two tight ends and a wide receiver.
22:36 UTC
When you jump off a building….
You can only go One Direction
00:11 UTC
What's the difference between homework and class?
I at least pretend to be happy in class.
16:50 UTC
A boss man has to pick from 3 ladies currently working for him as his new assistant. He leaves $500 in each of their desks and waits. Of course 1 spent it, 1 didn’t touch it and 1 invested it returning $1000. Which one got the job?
The one with biggest tits!
20:09 UTC
What does the 'y' in womyn stand for?
Always be yappin'
01:24 UTC
A new Jewish brothel has opened near me.
- It’s called “The Gash Chamber”
01:18 UTC
What wild Princess Diana be doing if she was still alive today?
Scratching at the inside of her coffin.
03:47 UTC
Girlfriend was telling her boyfriend that she was molested as a little girl . He said “ Oh I didn’t knew you liked older men .
22:47 UTC
Clinton, Obama, Bush, Biden and Trump all went to play golf together.
After a great game, they went for some beers and food.
When they were seated in the restaurant, Clinton ordered some BBQ ribs and told the waitress a BJ joke. Obama, who had ordered a tofu burger, got all outraged at Clinton for sexualizing the waitress. Bush ordered chicken-fried steak and kept his mouth shut.
After Obama forced Clinton to apologize, the waitress turned to Trump and asked him what he wants to eat.
"I'll have a YUUUGGEEE T-bone steak," says Trump. "T for Trump! Medium rare!"
"OK," says the waitress. "And what about the vegetable?"
Trump looks over at Biden and says "Ah, Just bring him some chicken tenders and an ice cream cone."
04:26 UTC
Baulderson’s cheese
Any dudes here who have less hair than their dad think that the name of that brand is phonetically offensive?
02:10 UTC
Jesus Christ was originally going to be called Gary…
..until Mary stubbed her toe one day..
23:10 UTC