Hi everyone. I would usually post this on another account cause this one is for gaming, but I want to get notifications as this is kind of 'urgent' at the moment. As the title suggests, a family member's tenure has expired and I am not sure what to do. I don't know where else to post this, but r/findagrave is the closest I can think of regarding this situation.

I have been doing a family tree and going back to my great-great grandfather. He has his own findagrave memorial with photos of his gravestone, which had a sticker reminding of tenure expiry. The memorial still had his plot info, but I searched him up on SMCT's Deceased Search (he's in Springvale Botanical Cemetery), and it shows plot info as the wall he was buried in, but no plot information. I did further research and found it was cause his tenure expired so plot info was taken out. I also found out to quickly contact before he's taken out if he hasn't been already.

I have contacted SMCT and let them know and I'll give a sample of what the email said:

__
Thank you for your enquiry about (great-great grandfather) and (great-great grandmother).

As the memorial have expired there are a few options to consider

1. Transfer to perpetuity (for all time), current price is $670.00 x 2.
2. Collect the ashes and plaques
3. Scatter the ashes within our grounds.

We have the Freemasons Homes as the current Holder of right. So this will need to be updated into another family members name.

__

So I have been given the option to pay perpetuity so it's stored all time, scatter the ashes, or collect the ashes and plaques. At the moment I am considering collecting the ashes, but that would be wrong, wouldn't it? All of his children have passed so only remain his grandchildren, but I am only related by great-great grandchild, and his grandchildren are still alive (I don't know any other than my own great-auntys and uncles). I could contact my great-aunty about the ashes since she's doing a similar tree, and she could collect them maybe, but wouldn't that still be wrong or something? I don't know. His right of interment is listed as 'Freemasons homes' and they said to be transferred into another family member's name. I don't want them scattered within the grounds either, and I am not too sure about it. I also don't have the money to transfer all time for both of them.

At the moment, I am in this dilemma and not sure what to do. I know I don't want to leave it as it might get scattered in burial grounds, but I also don't want to collect cause he's got close grandchildren still living. What should I do?

When I'm searching for a grave I prefer a minimalist approach. I carry a camera and my phone, with a list of names on my phone.

Of course, if I'm going to have to clear flat stones I have a - bright yellow - belt pouch holding brushes and a plastic trowel. It has to be bright yellow or I'll leave it behind at a gravesite.

And during the fall I clip a small whisk broom to the pouch, for moving leaves.

And if I'm chasing old stones, I have a powerful lamp, folding reflector, and shade that I carry in a backpack. Along with a higher definition camera.

And if there are many graves to be found, I usually print them out - in alphabetical order - include a printed map of the cemetery, and put everything in a clipboard that I refer to as I walk.

I am presently walking a large cemetery of 45,000 graves with 250 open requests. The cemetery has excellent maps that are detailed down to the plot numbers. But the maps are in a large format that does not display well on a phone. So I am carrying a laptop/tablet with all of the maps. and a laptop bag so I can put the laptop down and keep it dry while I take photographs. And the 250 names are in a spreadsheet on the laptop that I refer to as I walk.

So yesterday I found myself walking a cemetery path, wearing a belt pouch and laptop bag, holding a tablet in one hand and a phone with GPS in the other, not having much luck matching the cemetery map to the real-life terrain, flipping from map to spreadsheet to check spelling of the names . . . and I'm feeling a bit foolish and self-conscious as cars drive by.

It's a good thing I'm an intrepid explorer.

My dad (previous step dad but one to raise me) just passed. I was the one who stayed by his side until he passed (his biological children parted ways many many moons ago when he married my mother). I consider him my dad. He passed last Thursday and I just completed his death certificate with the funeral home. I am still in touch with my biological father who has helped me grieve during this time for my dad. I informed biological father that I will need his mothers maiden name for when his time comes and I am needed to fill out death certificate again. My biological father was adopted at birth, but within the last ten years, by a miracle, discovered who his biological parents were and even though they have passed he has created a close connection with his biological siblings. When he passes, should I put his adoptive mothers maiden name, his biological mothers name, or hyphenate both ( if both, which order?).

We are both wondering what the best way to go about that is. If someone were to search for him he has his birth name and adoptive name on his social media. Would it be hard to find his grave information or history of life if I was to only include one or the other? Does it matter?

I’d like to add a memorial for my grandmother but am not sure how to properly do so. She is listed on a headstone with my grandfather in one city but decided later in life she wanted to be cremated and her ashes spread with her parents in another city. We spread her ashes as she wished with a little at her headstone as well. Can someone provide guidance on how you would document this? Thank you so much for any guidance!

I'm not sure if this is the right place to ask but I was wondering if this is normal for cemeterys or not. My dad passed away a few weeks ago and I had to find a place to bury his ashes. I found a nice place that helped me go through the process of getting him a upright stone and helped me sort through his veteran paperwork to set all that up. Anyway, he is already buried and I returned to the site on his birthday, the day after the funeral and it got me wondering something.

So this cemetery have a military section and organizes it as one row only foot stones, the next row only headstones, then only foot stones, then headstones ect. They told me they do that to make it easier with grounds keeping. My question is, is that normal? Cause once the ground softens and my dad gets his official headstone in, won't it be blocking the view of the footstone in the row above? It makes me feel bad for the family who wants to visit there loved one in the footstone row because the headstone of the next row is literally 3 inches in front of it.

I’ve been looking for the death date, place, and burial for a father of this family I am working on. I think I may have found him buried with a couple of his children, but I’m not sure.

For example, I have section 31, lot 365 and then grave 1, 2, and 4 (I don’t know who is buried in lot 3). In grave 1 and 4 I know these are this man’s children. Lot 3 is very likely him, but I don’t know when or where he died and where he was buried.

Then there is section 31, lot 19. I have names for graves 3, 5, 6, and 7. Graves 3, 6, and 7 are this man’s sister, son and ex-wife. Grave 5 has possibly the grandfather, but again I don’t know any info around his death.

It really doesn’t help I’m working with the surname Frederick/Fredericks and they all have incredibly common first names. I honestly don’t know a lot about how cemetery plots are setup because I’ve never had to deal with it myself. Any help is appreciated.

Someone that has around 30k memorials has my dad, aunt and grandma, and I know for sure they aren't related, or at least not as closely related as me. I went under edit and contact and asked for a transfer, but what is a reasonable time to wait before I contact support?

I'm looking at a WWII veteran who's buried in a national cemetery and she also has a cenotaph in the family plot in another state. Both locations have FG memorials which link to her parents. So she's showing up as her own sister. Is there a fix for this other than dropping the parents on one of the memorials?

I just went to fulfill a photo request, but there's no headstone yet. So, I took photos of the unmarked grave & surroundings along with a close-up of the general area marker. Does anyone know if I should go ahead & put them up, or wait until the marker is set? And, would I maybe ask the office to let me know when that happens? TIA!

I am looking for the grave for Alexander G. Avret/Avrett. Hoping someone around here could get photos of the graves. It is an old family cemetary, I think with 6 graves mentioned online.
No clue what his middle name is, or the true spelling of the last name, as all gov. documents are different/misspelled.
Born and died 1815-1887
Wife Sarah Luckey 1813-1897 is likely buried next to him.

I downloaded and used findagrave's template and spent the time typing in info on a cemetery not currently on Findagrave.

I created the cemetery (although it won't let me add GPS so the pin is off by miles), when I upload the file, it does not accept it. I have tried cvs, xlxs and xls all without luck.

WTF? I am on a mac if that makes a difference.

Any suggestions?

I'm going to a local cemetery in the next few days to visit a family member's site and I figured this would be a good time to start contributing to find a grave. It's something I've been wanting to do for a while.

So when I look up the cemetery there's many requests but it's a very large cemetery and I'm not sure where to begin other than just wondering around with a list of names.

The cemetery website has a map but it just has paths and area names.

I don't know, I think this would be a great hobby to take up but it feels like looking for needles in hay stacks. Any advice for someone just getting started?

If any of y’all are in the Minneapolis-St.Paul area and are able to find some time in St. Anthony Catholic cemetery (around central ave NE) there should be a grave for Patrick and Bridget Hoban, relatives of mine, I requested a photo from the site manager but haven’t gotten a response and it has been months if any of you would be able to confirm the grave site and send a photo that would be absolutely amazing and it would mean so much to me…Thanks!

I've been on find a grave for a while and I've seen two ways to add initials in the middle name section of memorials. One with and one without the period. So which is the proper way?

Example: John T Doe or John T. Doe?

Hello. My great grandparents were apparently buried in West Ham Cemetery in London, England. When I went to Find A Grave it doesn’t list them at that location. I paid to get this info shown in the attached photo from Deceased Online. I noticed it show both of their names with the word “unrecorded”. Is that why I cannot find them on Find A Grave?

My parents are traveling to London from the US in less than a week and I’d like them to get photos of my great grandparents graves.

Is there any way I can achieve this? They don’t want to walk around looking at every grave stone. What are the possibilities? My great grandparents died in 1970 and 1961.

Thank you all for any advice or insight!

I’m researching the R.C. Cemetery where many of my family are buried. It’s a fairly small site, with about 300 graves, from the 1870s to modern times, many with indecipherable headstones and headstones originally with name plaques which have long since disappeared. I live only a mile away from it.

The cemetery record book vanished about 30 years ago according to the deacon of the church, so I’m trying to find alternative sources like newspapers for information. I’ve found thirty unrecorded graves already and added them to Find a Grave.

My UK council area does not have its cemetery details online.

I am wondering what sources of information have been used by Find a grave members to add the records - someone who has contributed tens of thousands of grave records all over the world, has added about 150 graves in this cemetery, so must have an online source somewhere. I just don’t know where to look.

What online resources do you use?

Recently I posted here on /findagrave and a couple of the responses I received made mention of getting irritated when someone posts a new photo that is "almost identical" to the photo that exists. So lets start a discussion of what makes for a good photo on FG. Sometimes it will take more than one photo to cover my list but that is why FG allows 5 photos per contributor.

I will start:

1. Genealogical details (name, dob, dod) should be as clear as possible
2. A picture should capture the whole marker/stone/grave, etc.
3. The picture should be taken at the same level as the main face of the stone (none of these downward angles)

If a current picture is blurry (older picture with outdated camera), taken from above, taken from far away, inscription cannot be read, I will take and upload an additional photo (or two) that meets my requirements above.

As I mentioned, per FG rules each contributor is allowed 5 pictures. And each memorial can have up to 20 pictures. As the memorial manager, if you do not like a posted picture you can ask the contributor to remove it or you can send an email to photo@findagrave.com to ask FG to remove it.

I have attached an example. On the left was the original picture on this memorial. Sure, you can read all the details so if all you want are name and dates that one is fine. The one on the right is the picture I took that meets my criteria. Its not only more readable but if a family member wants to include a headstone in their family tree I would contend that the picture on the right is much more pleasing.

You will notice that I did not include a wide angle picture that includes surrounding headstones. I can understand why someone would want that but it is not something I have been adding but may do so in the future.

So now your thoughts? What makes for a good picture?

https://preview.redd.it/04ms3qqqvv0e1.jpg?width=495&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c79e33b7ccae10cb4b4053065b0cf286d6d6200f

There is a cemetery in my town that was abandoned for a very long time and is now owned by the town / historical society. It has been closed to the public for my entire existence due to vandalism (graffiti and a partially exhumed grave in the 80s). There are over a thousand graves here with 30+ requests and I am itching to complete some. I am apart of a couple Facebook groups in my area and I have spoken to people in said groups who have asked if I could try to get in the cemetery. Of course I won’t do it illegally, how do I ask the historical society this and explain to them I want to take photos of some graves but I promise to not exhume any of them?? The woman’s response was not very helpful.

I'm researching my great great granduncle's mother-in-law right now and it has been difficult to say the least. Every source I find has differing DOB, DOD, spelling of name, etc.

Found on FG someone who could theoretically be them but the profile has bare bones information and their name was spelled phonetically. On a whim I look at the Manager's profile hoping it's a close relative. They have over 22k profiles they manage so I doubted it. Messaged them anyway and theyv got back almost immediately confirming it and sending me their death certificate and obituary giving me even more information than I ever expected. So happy for the win.

Would like opinions on the following. I canvas a lot of cemeteries in the Charlotte, NC area. Ive been coming across another graver that previously uploaded generic cemetery pictures to individual memorials and puts a caption on the picture of “No grave marker found”.

On one hand it lets other gravers like myself know that it’s already been looked for and not found. But on the other hand it inflates the percentage photographed for that cemetery which is misleading.

I’m not sure if I like the practice of not so curious what others think. If it’s a good thing I may adopt it when I canvas a cemetery and cannot find the marker.

I haven’t been able to find anything on the Find a Grave website, so any advice or suggestions would be much appreciated.

My grandfather was cremated and doesn’t have a gravestone, so in 2021 I made a ‘cremation’ memorial page for him after I noticed that was an option. A few days ago, I noticed that a memorial page had been created in 2023 for a memorial located in the city he had lived and died in, with his full name and death date. I have requested a photo to see if it is likely to be him, and if it is, what should I do regarding the memorial page I created? Should I leave it, or would it be better to have the 2023 memorial be the only page?

I was looking at a cemetery near me on FindAGrave and noticed there was a new memorial for a girl who died a few years ago in an accident. Recently there was a news article about her grave being vandalised (which included a picture of the vandalism).

I clicked on the memorial not really expecting much. There was a photo of the grave. Except the creator has taken this photo straight from the news article, and the vandalism is clearly very visible (it’s writing).

Am I ridiculous for thinking this is really disrespectful and out of line? This person has over 70k memorials—they’re American, not even from England where this grave is.

How do you flag them to be deleted? They're using fictional characters from television shows and putting memorials on FG in Arlington National of all places.

Mem: 276037785 Mem: 275940826 Mem: 275941024 Looking at their "manage" page, they seem to add a dozen or so. Generally I wouldn't care but seems tacky and unnecessary.

Is this a d--- move, hypocritical move or not? A close relative of mine just died. I helped write the obituary and was with her to the end. Due to the general nature and climate on findagrave rn, I've noticed a trend of "number collectors" who will sit for hours on obituary websites, racing to create a memorial when an obit is posted the chance they get to. Even if the person in question wasn't buried or had a official resting place yet. These people are vultures for numbers and usually won't upkeep these memorials or transfer them to close relatives.

Because of this, after the obit was posted and my family was settled, I decided to create a memorial (funeral isn't for another month) so that my relative can have a memorial that will be honored and properly mainted by me on the site. Is this me being a hypocrite? Am I justified in doing this? Also, if I post her obit that I helped write on the memorial, will I get in trouble due to copyright laws? Just wondering and would like some words from other users ...

Tyra Hunter was a trans woman from Washington DC who, after being in a car accident, was essentially left to die by paramedics when they found out she had male genitalia. It was a big deal to the trans community at the time but records of the whole ordeal weren't well-kept. I know she must be buried somewhere in DC, as multiple articles that I've trawled from the time mention a funeral that 1,000-2,000 people attended. However, I'm inexperienced with searching for graves, so I thought I'd turn to this community for help. Any tips are appreciated, I would love to drop by someday and leave some token behind for a lovely soul gone too soon.

https://preview.redd.it/dpv25pqummzd1.png?width=180&format=png&auto=webp&s=4adae9d840306e31ff4cd6eede9014d88990c3f2