I'm currently listening to it and although I know I don't agree with the messaging or the lyrics, there is often a sense of despair, helplessness, intensity, fear, isolation; an aching for closeness and intimacy, and a part of me resonates with that.

For example I want to talk about the implications behind the song "Never Alone" by BarlowGirl. Feeling of "god's presence" despite there being no god ? What is this? Like the feeling of someone imaginary and manifesting "a good feeling" but not being able to do that every time you need a "god fix"? What's going on with that?

And yet I still feel like listening to the song.

Never Alone - Barlow Girl

A moment of frustration and disgust with a Christian coworker (an older Gen X).

We were talking about young people getting jobs. He mentioned that a son of some friends of his had only ever had part time, food service jobs. His friends were worried since their son was close to 30.

My coworker is in tech and said that if the son wanted to try getting into the tech fields, he'd be happy to give advice and references. A couple weeks later, the son reached out.

They talked, my coworker suggested studying for and getting some certifications - Security+, A+, Network+.

The guy did! Studied for about six months and nailed down the certs. Then my coworker gave him a reference to a tech company he had friends at. Interview happens. The guy apparently did well, got the job, and the pay was 2x what he'd made before and lots of possible job/wage growth.

Awesome! Good on everyone!

Then ...... My coworker continues .......

"I called him a week later and talked to him and told him to remember that it was God who had given him that job and he needed to make sure to give back to God."

It wasn't the guy's motivation to seek a better paying career. It wasn't the guy's studying and work to earn the certs. It wasn't my coworker's networking. It wasn't the guy's good interview.

Nope. None of that hard work and social support.

God did it. You are shit. You can't do anything. Only Gawd!

This shit is so toxic.

Looking to get back into therapy and finally address deep religious trauma from growing up Orthodox Catholic. I keep seeing “Faith-Based” as a tag for some therapists but their bios are neutral and don’t mention anything about religion. Does this tag indicate that these therapists have studied faith and the impact it has on human development/psyche and therefore could help me with religious trauma? Or is this an indication they use God/faith/religious teachings in their approach?

So at the 24 hour fitness I go to, there's this group of like 5 Christians that just use the gym to have Bible studies and pray. Luckily they don't badger people who come in to work out so I just ignore them, although I still think they're kinda kooky. The other day I walked by the pool area and saw them doing Baptisms in the Jacuzzi, has anyone else seen this before? Good for them for getting their money's worth I guess. Maybe my gym is just ghetto lol

I feel like God doesn't want me to meet my biological father. I'm 27, and my mom told me who he was before she died when I was 23. He's a devout Christian, but I don't share his or his family's values. I finally decided to do some DNA ancestry testing, but it seems like God has given me a terminal illness.

Chances are, you have been afraid of this biblical passage before, that teaches of the unpardonable sin and the unforgiveness of those who commit it. Whatever "It" is, Christians are never clear and always argue about it's meaning. Apologists try to explain their reasoning in 40 minute sermons and they can never consisely agree on what it is.

If I had a nickle for the amount of times I've heard a Christian say "If you keep putting things off, and keep putting things off... you will commit it." Note that these people never know what the end point is. It is full of confusion and ambiguity.

We were told, "If you are afraid of commiting it, you have not commited it." My friends, this is a manipulative fear tactic designed to keep you afraid.

I struggled with this fear all my adult life, then I would look back on times I was not afraid of this sin, and conclude "Well I must have commited it if I was not afraid at some point!"

Do you see how damaging this psychology is?

I still struggle with fears about this sin in my deconstruction, and I am sure I am not the only one. But remember: The bible is never clear on what the sin is. It is a book full of contradictions and was designed to keep people within the fold using fear and manipulation.

If one existed, A truly just and good God, would keep you from commiting this sin. I know I prayed to be safeguarded from it when I was a Christian.

There is no need to be afraid of this unknowable sin, nor the people in the pulpit who capitalize on it to keep their congregation coming to church.

Thank you for reading.

My mom's side of family is very crazy jesus freaks it is really annoying I get preached to every time I see her I thankfully live with my dad he is Christian I think (he isn't religious haven't talked about religion with him in 2 years) ik people have it worse just saying

https://youtube.com/shorts/M_duwxzvxKo?si=dpiAN9-wrz_lv4Bf

........................................................................................ basically, my approach to this is different now than it would've been.

.......................................................................................... the old me thinking as I watch this video, guess there's still a christian in me somewhere but my approach to seeing someone in need now is entirely different. they think God is real and that they love Him. truth be told are you just praying because there's an underlying feeling of obligation and fear of being an "unfaithful" or do you genuinely want to help this person? it won't hurt to pray but if you genuinely wanted to help there would definitely be things you could do. ngl I've actually liked some spiritual encouragement occasionally but I still find it triggering how they think that prayer will MIRACULOUSLY snap him out of addiction. dont tell me im blaspheming and going to hell if I say this, cause it's scary to, but honestly? it's kind of... cringe

Today I got the following marketing email:

"Mother's Day can be a difficult time of year. If you would like to opt out of our Mother's Day email, no problem-just click the link below. You'll continue to receive all other [BRAND NAME] updates."

I really appreciated it because Mother's Day has historically been difficult for me. I spent a few years not talking to my mom, and once I reestablished a relationship with her I found it very difficult to pick out a Mother's Day card because most of them expressed feelings of a mom being someone you can always count on, who accepts you no matter what, who is an ideal role model, whose wisdom is always appreciated at any age, who eternally selfless, etc. and most of those sentiments did not feel true for me at the time I was rethinking my worldview. I also resent the idea of buying presents, sending cards simply because that was what society is pressuring me to do on a certain calendar date.

Can anyone else relate to Mother's Day being difficult due to deconstructing or leaving Christianity?

The condescension and pride in claiming that Sermon on Mount is revolutionary, greatest sermon ever preached. We've all heard it countless times. As though Jesus was the first person to give those sayings. The champion of the poor, oppressed and suffering.

Heck, do we know for sure it was Jesus' ? considering that Matthew was written ~50 years after Jesus' death? If Jesus did not say those, what is the source ? I've heard terms like Hillel, Didache. Anyone has any sources to point to?

I just watched this incredible documentary from HBO called Love Has Won, which shows an American woman who was convinced she was God herself and started posting videos online. She managed to convince many people into her online cult and lived in a house with her "disciples".

She claimed to be God, was very fond of alcohol and promised her followers she would come back after death, which obviously didn't happen. Doesn't that sound similar to you?

What if Jesus was just like this chick, but the difference is that there were no cameras back then?

TLDR: I (25F) am moving in with my boyfriend (28M). I moved across the country two years ago for work and have been doing well for myself. Started dating a guy a year and a half ago and I am the happiest I have ever been. We’ve both decided to move in together. Problem, my parents are EXTREMELY traditional. They have both expressed their displeasure with people moving in with their partners before marriage and I have been so vague about how my partner and I spend time together I.e. evenings, weekends and such that they just stopped asking the mechanics about it all but every now and then my mom still asks. Even now, we found the perfect apartment, we are so excited and I am losing sleep and I am anxious to the bone about telling them we’re moving in together before marriage. We’ve already discussed our timeline and our plan for the future, I’m pretty sure we’re getting engaged in the next year or so (he’s been vague but hinted about whether it’s happening in 8-10 months).

How do I go about telling them, I’m so scared to be excommunicated and disowned by them?

so for context i am 18 years old (f) and i have been a christian since i was like 6. my mom was raised catholic (but like only culturally lol), but her best friend  became christian and completely did a 180, she thought i’d be good for me to have beliefs and good morals, so she started taking me to church when i was 6.

i didnt star taking christianity seriously until i was 15. it was the pandemic and i would see tons of christian tiktoks, and they always seemed happy and fulfilled, like they had something i didn’t, even though i’ve always been a pretty content and positive person, i decided to give it a shot and i started reading the bible and talking to God, at first it was nice, i could live my life and just come back home and open my bible and pray, but after a while i started to feel guilty every time i wouldn’t spend time with God, and it didn’t help that i started reading the old testament, going form knowing a kind loving Jesus, to an evil God who punishes, installed me with fear, anxiety and guilt. i lived my whole high school experience filled with anxiety and overthinking, i could never be in the present moment or really enjoy anything, but i figured that that was how everybody else felt, i stopped praying and reading my bible constantly just because i’d forget, but that anxiety stayed with me, before i knew it i was leaving for college. i was still miserable and found joy in absolutely nothing, life felt like a chore, and i still couldn’t concentrate, so studying went down the drain (which is pretty bad, because i’m studying medicine lol), i started going to therapy after one instance where i overslept and failed two tests on the same day, i hadn’t showered or eaten in days and i realized that i couldn’t do this to myself anymore. therapy helped immensely !!, after our first session i was already so much better, no more anxiety, no more depression, life was finally worth living, it was how christian’s describe being  born again, life had so much color, joy, peace and love. every day was my favorite day, i could be kind to myself and to others and enjoy even the little things and moments, i aced my tests and lived in that overflowing joy for 2 months. then i came back home from college and started attending church again, listening to people talk about God seemed so silly and cringe, not wanting to feel that way i decided to start reading my bible and praying again, but it all came back, the dark cloud surrounded me again and i finally realized what it was. it’s been months since that happened and i’ve tried therapy again, but it doesn’t work know that i know what it is, knowing that it’s about God makes it hard to forget, because “God is everywhere” and “always watching” which makes me so anxious, i feel burdened, chained and anxious again. i don’t know what i believe, i truly don’t see any point of God in my life, i do believe in a higher power and i’m not against being thankful towards Him sometimes or praying a little when life gets a little bit too tough, but having to dedicate my life to God and having to do everything “for Him” is so depressing, also listening to christians is so sad, hearing them talk about how they feel guilty for not spending time with God, seeing how shameful and unworthy they feel, hearing sermons on church about analyzing to see if we are “putting God first” or “leaving sin behind” it just adds burden to my life. i also suspect that i have religious ocd, because my brain never leaves me alone, there is always a thought on my mind that doesn’t let me concentrate, it’s something like “you should be thinking about God” “do you still believe in God” “remind yourself that God loves you” “are you acting like God loves you” “why did you say that” “were you mean?” “were you kind enough?” so much anxiety and insecurity, i want my life back, that life i had for those two precious months, i wish i hadn’t tried coming back to God. i have no idea what to do. i believe in a higher power i just see no point in being devout, the phrase “don’t fix something that is not broken” always comes to mind with all of this. i don’t know if the fact that i am so scared of God because i can’t seem to understand Him, i have no clue what people imagine when they think about God and it scares me, also the idea of “God always watching” makes me paranoid and leads me to depersonalization. my mom was pretty physically and verbally abusive back in the day, so i don’t know if i am just projecting that image into God. i am also very scared of letting my beliefs go, because that would mean losing most of my community back home, my mom is not very devout she just believes and lives her life, but my step dad has started to take it more seriously. i’m just scared because nobody gets it and i understand that it might seem silly that God could get me so railed up, but to me it’s so real. if any body has had experience like this or has something to say, i would really appreciate it. thank you ! :)

Notice how it’s a nice picturesque scene and not a bunch of flies buzzing around a bloated corpse of an animal that died of natural causes and is now rotting away. No South American caterpillars that’ll cause you to be in extreme pain if you so much as brush against them. No human body that’s riddled with tumors either.

If you’re going to claim that it’s all made by God then it’s ALL made by God.

When you get on your knees for your spouse, at least they come.

For those who don’t know Pascal's wager is a philosophical argument advanced by Blaise Pascal that basically says the rational thing to do is to believe in god because if you’re wrong then nothing happens and if you’re right then you get heaven, but if you don’t believe and you’re wrong you get hell. So you lose nothing by believing.

The problem with this wager is that it isn’t just Christianity (or Abrahamic religions) and atheism. There are so many other religions so if you’re wrong you could just end up in the hell of a different religion.

Saw a clip of a cartoon where a bunch of people from different religions were all in hell and satan was there like “Mormons got it right” which led me to post this.

I’m just posting this for any people who are worried by what Pascal’s wager poses. It’s inherently flawed so you really have an equal chance to be screwed either way :)

Ever since i came out as atheist to my ultra religious christian orthodox family its been so exhausting!

When you’re a believer it doesn’t seem so bad but that’s mainly because of indoctrination, but once you escape holy fuck it’s so freeing and now i realize how toxic and abusive christianity really is.

My father is a great man but now he thinks that the devil got me and wants to make people leave christianity.

He thinks i’ll come back and is praying for me to be saved again which i don’t blame him it’s the fucking religion putting these ideas of hell and all that shit for control and manipulation.

I wish christianity never existed, it serves no purpose other than making people gain false hope because of heaven and treating every apostate as devil possessed.

Man i really wish christianity or any other religion never existed, the world would be such a better place.

Faaaaather Abraham had many sons AND MANY SONS HAD FAAATHER ABRAHAM.

In the past 48hrs, I've been speaking to more and more people outside my church and they're all convinced my church is a cult. This is just insane to me. I was right all along. Also a sister church in my area has a convicted pedophile back in 2018 and im just now finding this out. The article was sent in a family group chat and my uncle is saying to keep it out of the group chat. I knew they were keeping this a secret. This is purity and rape culture all balled up. I feel sick to my stomach, like what do I do?

I feel like I opened pandora's box. I wanna report stuff I've seen in my church but I'm so scared. I don't want this to be traced back to me somehow. Might delete later.

Anyways screw separation of church and state. There was never a separation to begin with. I'm so angry right now.

Please forgive the flair if it's wrong, I am still getting to grips with Reddit posting.

My favorite song is from a videogame called "Neo: The World Ends With You". It is called "Breaking Free."

Just look at how cathartic these lyrics are for getting out of religion:

Pounding at these prison walls inside my mind
Struggling to break free, but I realize I'm
Stuck here shackled by this insecurity that
Tells me I can't do what you're expecting of me

Every night I lie awake
Feeling like I'm just a mistake

Oh, take a look at me
I know I'm not the perfect boy you want me to be
All I really need
Is room to breathe because this pressure's killing me

All my life I've fought to win your validation
Always met with failure and humiliation
Maybe I belong here, shackled in this place where
No one else can see I'm nothing but a disgrace

Every night I lie in bed
Trying to escape from my head

Oh, take a look at me
I know I'm not the perfect boy you want me to be
All I really need
Is room to breathe because this pressure's killing me

So take a look at me
I know I'm not the perfect boy you've pushed me to be
But I've found some clarity
My life's too precious to live shackled by insecurity

And now I'm breaking free
I'm through with you and everybody else telling me
Who I'm meant to be
I'm taking back control
The world ends with me.

This song always resonated with me, back when I first heard it in 2021. I had fundimentalist dispensational bible beliefs and I never realised how held back I was.

Can you please share what music is currently helping you in your deconversion?

Somehow, I have fallen in to an ex-Mormon rabbit-hole on YouTube. I was watching one of the videos and the woman was walking about how she moved and the Mormon girls were just cruel and mean to her. But, she wanted to be friends because they were all Mormons and they should be her friends. Meanwhile, in art class, she made friends with some funny, strange, girls who were the "bad" kids in her worldview. They would occasionally smoke cigarettes and looked like the type that might be considered the druggie kids. Those kids welcomed her, accepted her as she was, didn't expect her to change, and just were kind and welcoming.

This brought back memories of high school. I was not permitted to have friends outside church. At least, not real friends that I would see outside of the school day. So all my friends were church kids. A new boy moved to our church and the rest of the teens were just horribly cruel to him. They didn't want him around. They would not invite him to stuff. They were just dicks to him. I, deeply in the ex-christian closet, felt something these religious teens did not. I felt empathy and compassion. I started insisting on inviting this kid to stuff, hanging out with him, and just making him feel welcome. We eventually did become friends, and he commented that I was the only one from the church who was kind. He knows, now, that I was a nonbeliever at the time.

When I went to college, I was so worried about how hard it would be to make friends without meeting them in church. I was worried about them being mean and dismissive. What I found was the opposite. The secular kids that clicked with my worldview were welcoming, accepting, and just warm and kind people. As they got to know me, and realized that I was denied a lot of popular media growing up, their reaction wasn't to mock me for never seeing a certain TV show, movie, or knowing a song. It was excitement at being able to introduce me to it and be part of the experience. I wanted to try new things, but they wouldn't pressure me or make me feel bad for not having done something or being unwilling to try something right away. It was the opposite of what the church had told me, about how they would pressure me to sin and do horrible things. The secular people built me up and celebrated life with me.

I don't know what I am getting at here. I'm rambling. But, I wonder how common this experience is. How many of us experienced the mean, "good," christian people who did everything to destroy us and others, and found the "evil" people were kind, welcoming, and wanted us around?

There are firsthand eyewitness accounts of Bigfoot. Zero firsthand eyewitness accounts of Jesus's resurrection. Think about this:

Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John, never claim to be authors of their own Gospel. Matthew starts with "According to Matthew" and the original manuscripts don't have a "Matthew" title. There are more holes when you think about John's advanced theological education when he was a mere fisherman from Galilee. Does it really fit that he wrote his own Gospel? Evidently, it was very likely the early Christian fathers wrote the Gospels. No scholar accepts Peter as the author (also because he was a fisherman from Galilee who likely was not literate who also spoke and wrote in Greek. Paul never claims to meet Jesus in person, but that he saw "a vision" of a guy who said he was Jesus.

To take it a step further, they never say "I saw Jesus after he died". It was always "three women saw Jesus", "I heard Thomas saw Jesus", etc etc. At best, we are reading an account written on behalf of someone else who has heard another person witness Jesus's resurrection. A tertiary source at best.

People who claim to have seen Bigfoot with their own eyes are primary sources, significantly more reputable and valid than a tertiary source.

I don’t believe in god and I have zero interest in god, church, religion, or any type of spirituality.

But I’m at the end of my rope and I’m so desperate for my situation to improve I feel the urge to pray. I still don’t believe in god but I just don’t know what else to do. The situation is completely out of my control and I feel like I’m in fucking purgatory. I haven’t been this depressed and hopeless in a long time

My mom recommended that I go to therapy after (finally) realising that I am struggling. I was relieved at the idea of finally talking to someone who can help me with issues that have been bothering me for years, but when I found out that I would be going to a Christian therapist I was instantly disappointed.

Part of me wants to go, because I don't want to pass up an opportunity to improve my mental health (and not get flack for taking an opportunity when I should have), but another part of me feels like it's just going to be an echo chamber of "just pray harder" mixed with traces of CBT (that didn't work for me).

Edit: The pamphlet I was given says "Master's level Christian therapist", and the organization is called Shalem. Sounds sus honestly.

He sends me daily verses from the bible app and nothing else. I am having a bad day and he sends me this and the first thing that popped into my mind is "He wants to make me feel like a disappointment" since the first line of this devotion talks about being disappointed with yourself. I WANT to block him but I cannot bring myself to do it.

The further I get from the end-time brainwashing of Christianity, the more foreign it sounds to hear the beliefs of Christianity explained by someone not from the religion.

"Christian Zionists are Evangelicals who believe that god promised Israel only to the Jews, and that an apocalyptic war will bring about Jesus' second coming when they claim all Jews will go to hell"

As former Christians who believed in the 'end-times', I'd love to hear your thoughts on this take...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KvnsFvQ9GAc