Hello. This first half of the chapter involves a ruthless antihero in Miami who is genetically mutated with an animal. She kills criminals in the name of justice. However, things would take a turn when she finds that her sister is in danger. Throughout the story, many more animal-mutated fighters would stand in her way from protecting her.

The story is planned as a trilogy involving the antihero, her sister, and, in the end, their mother. It would contain worldbuilding lore on genetic mutations and their types, involving taxonomy.

Any form of critique is greatly appreciated.

Link:
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1-KOds1p6NYG_LdACJtfGZVHBLQeWLZeg1e87HGq4oJk/edit?usp=sharing

Critiques:

Hey all!

Back again with another snippet from my contemporary romance. This is about mid-way through when Nora's starting to have some real feelings towards Jamie (even if she doesn't entirely know it yet).

While I welcome any and all feedback, some of my concerns are:

1. Does the mother's dialogue seem realistic? I want her to seem ignorant but not comically villainous

2. Does their rekindle seem too abrupt? I was trying to make it seem like they're close enough that a big fight won't turn them apart.

For context: It's a fake dating trope so that's what I mean by starting to have feelings. Jamie left his family for ten years, dealing with depression so that's what they're referring to. This is also like mid-way through the dinner scene, it starts with them starting the dinner and all that jazz, this is just the meat and potatoes of the scene so I apologize it it feels like you're being thrown in here.

Excerpt

Crit [1711]

Hey.

This is a poem about someone who really wants the aux.

All feedback super appreciated. Thanks!

Link to the poem.

[609] Critique

Chapter 1 of my dark steampunk fantasy taking place in Greimspeur, following the bounty hunter Lyth.

Found HERE

Critiques:

[2367]

[2544]

[2611]

I do have some questions to help with the kind of critique that I'm looking for, but any high-effort crit is always appreciated. Thank you so much.

• Is it clear who the characters are? What stood out about them and/or their relationships?
• Are the stakes clear? Are they organic?
• What can you tell me about Lyth that appeals to you as a protagonist? Is there anything you don’t like, or room you can see for improvement?
• Considering the length of the chapter, what would you trim, or where would you put an organic chapter break?
• Did you feel the world of Greimspeur is believable for what it is? Does it feel fleshed out?
• What themes stand out to you?
• Is there too much exposition? Not enough?
• Is there too much description? Not enough?
• Is there anything that is confusing, or warrants better explanation?
• What would you like to see more of? Less of?

We are headed toward Halloween like a Trip Ubusan and not like a Train to Busan

#Here’s the here and now

This year’s official entry post

This year’s official announcement post

#Here’s the stuff from years before

2023 contest entry post

2022 contest entry post

Maybe it’s because no one’s feeling it. Maybe it’s because everyone waiting to the last second before midnight to surprise Vincent Price. Maybe it’s because everyone is sorting by new and reddit algo hides some things. Whatever thr case, we are headed to Diwali. I mean Halloween. Nope, An ofrenda for Día de Muertos? Checks calendar. Guy Fawkes. We end on remember, remember the fifth of November.

As always, feel free to post off topic stuff or give a shout out. Maybe post your favorite Pinoy Picture spoof of Korean films. How niche can you go?

Hi all,

This is another chapter in my current project. All feedback is welcome. For context, my main character is 16. He lives with his martial arts teacher who is a father figure to him. They are working security at an underground party. (Literally.) My MC used to work for a drug dealer. And he runs into someone he knew from that crowd in this chapter.

As I said before, all feedback is welcome. But I am really curious what people think of Whistler.

My work: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1tZbslzaMrDG91ie4hMIoL4IeEAFYOBUPsl0PCeYedXM/edit?usp=sharing

Thanks in advance.

Critiques:

https://old.reddit.com/r/DestructiveReaders/comments/1gb1mv8/1931_a_dark_and_endless_sky_prologue/ltrr00z/

https://old.reddit.com/r/DestructiveReaders/comments/1g807uw/306_hitching_a_lift/ltllfe1/

https://old.reddit.com/r/DestructiveReaders/comments/1galwrg/121_calming_hexagon/ltkmdnd/

https://old.reddit.com/r/DestructiveReaders/comments/1gb0f8c/609_wholesome_parents_raise_supervillian_son/ltkiytg/

10 Hours of Black Noise to Bring You Peace

I plan on using this for my creative manuscript as I apply for MFA programs. Any feedback would be greatly appreciated.

2151

915

1711

228

896

I have written this short story some days ago. While editing, I realised it is too hard to be objective and I really need feedback from other people. I have written a few questions at the end of the document. It would be great if you could answer them.

Link:

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1v_sognZNfjTcJMJmy1cOM5LhNpIDjNhetHKo0eb9NBU/edit?usp=drive_link

Link to my critiques:

1. https://www.reddit.com/r/DestructiveReaders/comments/1fnmxxv/comment/lqrvcdm/
2. https://www.reddit.com/r/DestructiveReaders/comments/1ftavnz/comment/lqoqzy1/
3. https://www.reddit.com/r/DestructiveReaders/comments/1g60uwa/comment/ltndpsd/
4. https://www.reddit.com/r/DestructiveReaders/comments/1g37wil/comment/ltnj51h/

A gritty, dark dive into the dystopic, steampunk land of Greimspeur, following the main character of Lyth, a bounty hunter tasked with finding a criminal who is more dangerous than she first appears. The two form an unlikely and reluctant partnership when they discover there's something much bigger to worry about than petty theft and murder.

Critique #1

Prologue

Hello,

Trying some humor writing. (think Hard Times / McSweeny's). Innterested in all thoughts, but if you read in this style, or write humor then would love general tips you might have.

Link - Wholesome Parents

Critiques - Dark Library chp 1

Light over the Docks

Hi all,

This is another chapter in my current project. All feedback is welcome. For context, my main character is 16. He lives with his martial arts teacher who is a father figure to him. He is also close to his sister, who lives a few hundred miles away. Part 1 is still up, if anyone wants to read it for more context.

My work: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1vJrTjA18n56law2XLJGyrXph8A5rBSCsztvWRRlCkno/edit?usp=sharing

Thanks in advance.

Critique: https://old.reddit.com/r/DestructiveReaders/comments/1g8zryp/915_old_friends/ltbro8k/

Hello, I'm a new student, ready for the serious criticism. And, before reading, I apologize if there is a grammatical issue in the short text, as English is not my mother tongue.

Link to the story: [121] Calming Hexagon

Link to the critique: [122] Untitled

I am asking for an entirely honest reply; and any suggestion is appreciated.

Hey.

This is a short story about making a sandwich.

All feedback really appreciated. Thanks!

Link to the story.

[915] Critique

More and more this "website" is trying to force the app on us. Cutting our code, pushing hover effects, forcing our links to break...

Recently, two of my completely innocent sock puppet accounts got banned permanently (along with several others that deserved it lol). They're also pushing a new "AI" "abuse filter" and "harassment filter" on us as mods, and using that as an excuse to scrape our "totally not shared it's anonymous :)" Google drive email addresses by default using an auto fill script. Why are they forcing us to use Google to opt out of their Ai filter???? They're already obviously deploying it without any consent from us as mods... It's a global enforcement. Free speech is completely gone on this site. Has anyone actually read /r/worldnews for example? Zero real users. /r/news going much the same. Hell, even /r/askreddit now has an 80%+ removal and curated thread hand picking sorting method now.

So, don't sign up your throw away account with a real email. And assume your privacy on this shit tier app is completely compromised.

We will obviously be disabling whatever AI admin enforced bullshit they try to shove at us. The admins have been shadow banning more and more accounts too. If anyone has found a better place to host this site please let us know. God I hate this platform so so much.

Hi all, This is an early draft. I've written a lot about these characters before, so to anyone who's been around here a while, they might seem familiar. This is not a standalone story, and it's not even the first chapter in this series of stories. So there is very little character introduction here.

This is an early draft that I am not entirely happy with. So any feedback would be appreciated.

My work https://docs.google.com/document/d/1sq9ttwMC6RYLzWp_rE4Cal8HZooQVma3s2BGSyBJBR4/edit?usp=sharing

Thanks in advance.

Critique:https://old.reddit.com/r/DestructiveReaders/comments/1g6qjhs/1843_body_in_the_water/lt3loyg/

This is my first work being posted on here, please do not hold back at all in your critique. It might be a bit triggering for anyone who can't do mommy issue trauma. (I don't know how to describe it better.)

Enjoy, I guess. I hope.

The Lawn Is Dead

I'm just going to link my critique down below, please let me know if there's a better way to do this!

[915]

I can't seem to look at this thing objectively, or at least less so than other work. Please hate it, then explain why. If you can't find it in your heart to hate it, please also explain why. But I'm sure you won't have any trouble. Thank you, my friends.

Old Friends

[1508]

THE PARADOX PALACE is a 92,000-word fantasy comedy from the perspective of a professor who got fired for preaching about her favorite cryptid: specifically birdmen. Who knew carnivorous birdmen make for great friends? Archeologist extraordinaire Alice Webb sure did and was promptly exiled to an arctic wasteland. As if “peddling fairy tales as world history,” according to critics, would soil their university’s reputation.

For feedback, I'm especially looking for comments on where you might've been confused about the situation the protagonist is in, confusion about what the conflict they face is at particular points, but especially comments on parts where you might've lost interest or been confused about what the protagonist's goal was. Also, let me know if the pacing feels too slow.

My chapter: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1S4kUZSO3fefZ8XA5A_Vzj6yzZtepSK_ASaZSJiySnIo/edit?usp=sharing

My critiques: https://www.reddit.com/r/DestructiveReaders/comments/1fxgwob/comment/lqo6wk7/ https://www.reddit.com/r/DestructiveReaders/comments/1fvthty/comment/lqzlaj5/ https://www.reddit.com/r/DestructiveReaders/comments/1fuoayn/comment/lqoql22/

Hey.

This is a short story about someone in a rush.

Content warning for some explicit language--I guess?

Please let me know if it's even comprehensible whats going on.

Thanks!

Link to the story.

Critique [482]

This is the first half of the first chapter of what you might call a paranormal sci-fi espionage novel. I'm new to writing long-form fiction, so I’m mostly concerned with developing a legible writing style.

• Does the prose flow well? Are there any points that stick out as jarring or amateur? Is it suspiciously purple in colouration?

• Does it serve as an effective hook, and maintain interest? I find it hard to judge pacing within chapters, and struggle with macro pacing across multiple chapters.

• How well do the characters/story/world land?

Link to the Piece

Note: Since this is just the first slice of the chapter, I don't think it stand on its own as a story. It's more about setting the place and mood.

Critique:

[1738] - The Iron Door

This originally started as a response to the holiday prompt this month. I found myself writing far more than 1500 words.

It's set in modern day, but I wanted to give the feel of classic gothic horror in the language.

I wanted to know if the metaphors were too forced or if the allegory is too trite. What works for you and what doesn't? This is a rough draft and it should ultimately wind up a longer short story.

story

critique 1

critique 2

Just getting back into writing after a while of very little free time.

[Critique] https://www.reddit.com/r/DestructiveReaders/s/CVDyj7GDkY

[Link] https://docs.google.com/document/d/1f1mL8Vvp8luakUblXmLIjetdZsP04ANk2IQjXae054Y/edit?usp=drivesdk

Hey hey! New kid on the block here, and I gotta say, the critiques in this sub are pretty good. I’ve been lurking around, checking out some of the good critiques so i can copy their homework, and figured I'd throw my hat in the ring. So, here's my prologue for you to pick apart.

Quick note: this prologue is in second-person POV, but the rest of the book is in good ol’ third-person. Why? Because creativity. I’m curious if you think second-person works here, or if it’s jarring. You tell me.

Also, you’ll notice I do not describe the most interesting thing in the room, leaving things a bit vague. Totally intentional. It ties into some big plot points later on, so I’m hoping it doesn't feel like I forgot how to describe stuff. Let me know if I’m pulling it off or if I need to go back to Writing 101.
It's like in horror when you are adviced to not describe the monster directly.

I’m still ironing out some kinks in the story and my writing, so feel free to tear me to shreds (in the nicest possible way, of course). I know there are some inconsistencies—ready for your brutal honesty.

CONTENT WARNING: Blood and Gore!!

My prologue:
[1738] The iron Door

My critiques:
[661]

[1508]

Old dusty piece of junk that I thought the inspectors should look at. Any and all thoughts are appreciated.

Some material here may be sensitive to those who have experienced trauma/abuse.

Freedom

[1114]

#The Dark Library — Chapter Three

Hey guys I wrote this chapter. Hope you enjoy it. I appreciate any and all feedback. Most importantly, would you keep reading and flip the page to Chapter 4?

Feel free to read/critique starting from the earlier chapters if you wish.

And thank you for all your feedback on my previous chapters!

Previous Chapters

• The Dark Library — Chapter One
• The Dark Library — Chapter Two

Critiques

• https://www.reddit.com/r/DestructiveReaders/comments/1f88o38/2800_a_kingdom_cast/lljzini/
• https://www.reddit.com/r/DestructiveReaders/comments/1f7x2x6/1306_genesis_and_exodus_part_2/llhfkhl/

critique

untitled

i'd like feedback on how well the meaning comes across to the reader. could it be clearer? how?

Hey all! Check out the first chapter of my first story I've ever written. Let me know what you think, as I'm eager to improve.

Story: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1-1DxtxXCgcFVl-kOf1DW5yEv6ycW-bf6pEXpUXMXfvM/edit?tab=t.0

Critique: https://www.reddit.com/r/DestructiveReaders/comments/1fy1msg/990_gingerbread/

My excerpt: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1eYGpTDXatlARNaqCjk3yyhJ-GIj9CWLXbNtgVNRF88E/edit?tab=t.0

This is an excerpt from a clean romance story I'm writing. This is my first foray into sharing my writing, and I'm just looking to get a general sense of where I am at in my writing, and what works and doesn't work.

Critique: https://old.reddit.com/r/DestructiveReaders/comments/1fzq8yh/1542_gingerbread_part_2/lrtur75/

This is the first chapter of a fantasy story I wrote. Thanks for reading and critiquing.

The following link goes to the document

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1D9_cfgo-a2pnIsIs-nW4a5R_RV4sPGfQcFRvawSfV0Q/edit?usp=sharing

Previous Critique: [2745] Lies we Program https://old.reddit.com/r/DestructiveReaders/comments/1fxgwob/2745_lies_we_program/

I'm not sure how to make the link go specifically to my comment on this page, but I critiqued this submission.

##Welcome to the sixth official Destructive Readers Halloween story contest!

Why do we like horror? I don’t know if I have really read a satisfactory answer to the question even though I love doing random dives of intellectual belly button surfing about it and coming across something like Todestriebe. What does it say about my education in school that we learned about Eros and Libido, but never Thanatos and Mortido? It probably falls under the category of why we learned about the Black Death and the Yellow Death read the Red Death but no teacher really broached the Blue Death? All these little gaps in education or have we simply forgotten?

This year's accepted themes: Halloween, Spookiness, Creature Feature Cryptid Time, Todestriebe, your local equivalent of Bubbly Creek or something forgotten

Spooky season is upon us. In honor of our yearly tradition, we present to you our Halloween contest! We are super excited again.

###Official Submission Thread Here

—-

Prizes

I don’t know. Maybe. I didn’t think we were going to last year, but then I believe there were. It’s above my pay grade.

Contest Rules

1. Submit one previously unpublished work of fiction no longer than 1500 words. Double-space your work and use a serif font (e.g., TNR or Georgia.)
2. Users may choose to write and submit in a team of two, and if choosing to do so must make all participating members known in their submission. A secondary work may be submitted in the case of entrants collaborating. This would lead to a maximum of two submissions: one individual, one collaborative.
3. Post a Google Docs link in the RDR contest thread to be posted on the 22th of October with a <100-word description of your story. Only Google Doc submissions will be accepted for judging. Be aware Google Docs links to your Google account. Please create a throwaway Gmail if you're concerned with anonymity.
4. There are four judges in total: u/Grauzevn8 (mod) and u/Kataklysmos_ u/Jay_Lysander and u/Far-Worldliness-3769 as non-mod judges.
5. Who can and cannot? Judges cannot submit. A judge using an alternate and submitting would be beyond so uncool, I don’t even know what to call that—nor do I believe given the anonymous personas presented that any of us would. Previous judges can submit and potentially win. Same goes for previous mods. Current mods who submit are ineligible for winning (but Alice seems to always scoff at us for that). AI? Do we need to cover this? This might auto win the Dead Horse award reserved for overused trope.
6. Public participation is encouraged! If you like a story, leave a positive comment in the thread. (Please do not critique the submission.) Comments will be taken into consideration by the judges’ panel. Go ahead and upvote. We will keep things in contest mode and judges may consider subreddit voting.
7. Reddit sitewide rules apply.
8. Submissions open on Sunday the 13th of October and close on November 5th 2 minutes to midnight in Turkmenistan (GMT+5) because that is where the Door to Hell is located and ties in with Bubbly Creek theme. The contest is limited to 40 entrants (subject to change based on interest). Judges will announce the winners 2 weeks after the submission window closes.
9. 1st and 2nd place winners may have to disclose personal information (email and/or address) to the mods to receive their awards IF gift cards become a prize.
10. All SFW genres are welcome (e.g., horror, YA, fantasy, sci-fi, lit fic, etc.) Gore is okay. However, we will not accept graphic sexual violence, graphic violence towards children, or erotica/smut. IF you think your story broaches NSFW territory, but within Reddit TOS, mark your submission comment with NSFW.
11. Grammar and punctuation count. We don’t expect perfection, but stories with egregious or repeated errors will not win prizes.
12. Critiques are not required to enter the contest.
13. Please do not submit your story to RDR for critique until the contest is over (at which time all sub rules apply). This contest is meant to test your skill as a writer.
14. Once the contest ends, if requested by the author, judges will post feedback on all stories they review.

—-

Super excited to see all your spooky stories! Feel free to use this thread to ask any questions or have the normal weekly fireside chat about this or that. Also any recent posts or critiques that stood out? Feel free to give them a shout-out here.