Well, the title says it all really.

About twenty years ago (my daughter is now a young lady of twenty-two, recently graduated and visiting us briefly for the holidays before she flies off to be exciting in Europe), when she must have been three-ish, we were lying on my younger sister's bed together at my parents' place, and I was reading her an illustrated copy of "The Little Match Girl". You know those kinds of children books where each page is a full on colour illustration?

About the second match in I could feel the physical symptoms of sobbing rise in my throat, my voice began to shake, but I didn't think it was going to be so bad, and I was still hopeful my daughter would fall asleep so I kept reading and tried to fight it down.

A couple more pages and the dams broke loose- I didn't even cry like that for my parents' funerals, many many years later. It was full on ugly-crying such as is rarely inspired by real-life events, and can take only a master story-teller like Hans Christian Anderson to provoke. My poor daughter was confused and had no idea why I was crying, and I think my mom came to the room and told me off for confusing and upsetting my daughter, although maybe she didn't and I am imagining it, a constructed memory of what feels like could have happened, but may or may not have. And I think my sister laughed at me.

Have you ugly-cried at a book? When, where, what book?

Hello readers and welcome to our Weekly FAQ thread! Our topic this week is: How do you get over a book hangover? Please use this thread to discuss whether you do after you've read a great book and don't want to start another one.

You can view previous FAQ threads here in our wiki.

Thank you and enjoy!

I just finished a book which normally would've been a DNF but my sister absolutely loved it and wanted us to be able to discuss it. As I struggled through a book I really wasn't enjoying, it got me thinking. Which of these would you have an easier time forgiving?

• poor writing but captivating plot

• not much action but incredible writing

So what makes Fourth Wing a commercial success?

Fourth Wing a fantasy romance Seires has garnered massive success within the book genre. Information about an Amazon is already being planned and the like . And the book blew up relatively quickly. It's sequel having premierd a while ago and Third instalment coming soon.

I'd like to deposit what makes it successful within its sphere. Having seen a lot of readers flat out admit it got them into fantasy it seems the book strengths lie at being really accessible.

But like other more famous fantasy's Seires has a lot of side lore within the book for readers to ponder on . Characters and inner factions the books always seem to add a new mystery or angle .

Id argue while it's main character may be rather simple, they are very determined and that energy does transfer over to the reader to continue pushing further along the pages .

Add in Dragons Bieng central and crucial to the plot it's a remarkable strength it just knows what it wants to be and succeeds at it .

In any case what are your reasonings for the books success.

So it's been a long time after "Little Heaven" and "The Deep", two novels written by Nick Cutter, and now I've finished a collaborative effort by Cutter and another author, Andrew F. Sullivan. It is titled "The Handyman Method".

The Saban has moved into a rural and unfinished development, and already there are cracks forming, not just in their new residence, but in their lives as well.

Trent, a father struggling with unemployment and in his uncertainty of his place in the world, attempts DIY home repairs. Attempts that lead him into a rabbit hole --one that results in dark radicalizations of a supernatural sort, with a mysterious instructor that gives him extremely dark and subliminal suggestions about handling any kind of problem in the house.

Rita steps into the role of breadwinner, and tries to keep the family together when everything begins to get out of hand and goes from bad, to the absolute worse. Especially as their son, Milo, who is left to his own devices, shows some disturbing signs of side effects of spending way to much screen time.

This book is short, but wildly intense, going all the way to 100%! 'The Handyman Method" is a horrifying ride of suspense that keeps going right until the breaking point arrives. It also provides a glimpse of how families can be strained in certain ways and of how social media can oftentimes have a very negative effect on people. Really fantastic stuff despite the short length.

So far I've read a few novels by cutter including this one, but Andrew F. Sullivan is a new one for me. It looks like he's published some material himself, material that just might be of intense interest for me!

I was a member of another online forum and found it very frustrating that people were using what they read as a way to create or strengthen divisions. Like between people who liked genre fiction vs. those who read the classics. Or one type of genre fiction vs. another. Or rejecting someone just because they read a book by a disliked author or on a taboo subject or whatever. Felt like high school when you could get rejected if you said you liked, say, a new age musician (as opposed to rock music or something).

I still feel quite wary about mentioning the books I have enjoyed reading, always worrying someone is gonna come out and judge me harshly and say, "How the hell can you like that garbage? I mean you are entitled to your opinion...but damn!"

I think a better question to ask, when someone talks about liking a book that you did not or the kind of book you would not read, is, "What did you like about it the most?"

Often the reason for liking a book has to do with more than intellect, it's something that speaks to the person's heart, validates their experiences or desires, and is true or enlightening in some personal way. You could of course say, "to each their own," and let that be the end of it, but I think by asking open-ended and nonjudgmental questions, reading can be used as a way to bridge gaps and brings us together, not push us further apart.

Yuval Harari's latest book is probably his best since Sapiens, and potentially much more important.

The popular historian has often said that history is the study of change. And it is with this view that he breaks down how important information networks have been throughout history, and then goes on to speculate how new technologies could become extremely life-altering. Specifically, the bulk of the book is a focus on the dangers of AI.

There's a fascinating history lesson in the first third, which Harari as always excels at. Taking the complex histories of various religions and then the printing press and the scientific method and more, and presenting these in ways easy for the layman reader to understand and process at a Big Picture scale.

The majority of the chapters are more about modernity and computers. In that vein, many examples are given, which are not so much future possibilities as they are records of what has already gone wrong when social media upends entire societies around the world: The genocide in Myanmar is explained at length, to highlight that these are not just hypothetical situations. We can also see how populism came about, making something coherent out of all the nationalist ideologies around the globe which do tend to be contradictory, giving the reader perhaps an overly fair assessment of why they've been so appealing to voters.

Harari certainly talks a lot about misinformation, and how it's been so prevalent with the rise of engagement-driven algorithms which are incentivized to bring out the worst in people. Frankly, at times it's a bit frustrating how he doesn't call a spade a spade and blame the right-wing specifically for this. There have been many studies proving those on the political right are far more likely to share misinformation online, but Harari has a style of being "above it all" and won't quite say that outright. Either way, there is something happening with this current phenomenon of information and communication breaking down, and it does need to be objectively studied.

Another valid criticism is a lack of analysis about capitalism. It is kind of assumed that democracy is a superior form of government, whether philosophically a Kantian or a utilitarian, which I of course agree with. But contrasting with lengthy examples of oppression in, say, Stalin's Soviet Union or religious fundamentalism in Iran, capitalism as the system causing what is now happening is only passingly mentioned. Which is a shame, because it is rather obvious that tech companies are already breaking down society so much precisely because of the profit motive.

By the end of the book, what leaves the biggest impressions are warnings about the future of AI, which will most likely exacerbate all these issues. There are the obligatory positive potentials mentioned, in healthcare for example, yet we all know there is much to fear. The list of worse-case scenarios about how AI could destroy both democracies and dictatorships--and then become the worst imaginable dictatorship, these go on and on. It is indeed frightening.

Something Harari explains well is the "garbage in, garbage out" principle, about how we must be skeptical of machine learning and language models because human biases are inherent in the data they collect. Moreover, as we grow more dependent on AI, which version of human nature will win out... Will we be able to remain skeptical, or will we end up trusting these seemingly godlike technologies as infallible? So, if it's the latter, how dangerous will that become?

The overall question of the whole thesis, is whether or not democracy be able to survive the tumultuous 21st century. Harari speaks of how dictatorships tend to fall because of rigid institutions and lack of reality-based communication, and how democracy has major advantages due to self-correcting mechanisms and the ability to adapt.

With the rush of current events that have occurred since this book was published, in this year, does that seem to apply to the United States anymore?

Unfortunately, it's hard to imagine many reasons for optimism any longer.

Harari does repeatedly say that history and technology are not deterministic. That there are many paths that may appear, and there's no reason to believe there's only one way it has to be.

But is this a good thing or a bad thing? The assumption that more information will inevitably lead to more truth, is something he calls the naïve view. He's not wrong; this perspective supporting the free-for-all online doesn't seem to be working out at all. And a major example in history before was the printing press. Everyone thinks that more books inevitably led to the enlightenment and science and an eventual higher standard of living. But that wasn't necessarily destiny, in fact. One of the first best-seller books in those easy days when the technology was new, was the Hammer of Witches. A psychotic and perverted treatise pandering to sick fantasies, kind of like QAnon, which brought about an era of witch burnings in Europe. Perhaps it's only an accident of history that the printing press later seemed to have worked out better for at least some of humanity.

With that in mind, we should definitely be working much harder to create more self-correcting mechanisms to fight against AI and algorithms gone awry. Before it's too late. Very tragically, that's not something rapidly aging government officials holding on to power are interested in whatsoever, or even barely understand. The tech giants and the ultra-wealthy influencing so much seem to have the opposite view, that they should empower computers and informational chaos even more, just on the chance they might make even more money.

It feels bleak, there's no other way to put it.

Whether or not Nexus by Yuval Harari is perfect or not, it is vital that the mainstream learn about these issues one way or the other. Read more, study more, get other perspectives. If this book by a popular nonfiction author is the way to get more people thinking, then that's what it takes.

I recommend it very much, and most of all I hope at least some of these ideas trickle up to those in power so we can face what's coming and against all odds, somehow, finally create a better world.

I don't read much fiction, but the fiction I do read tends to be post-apocalypse. I have always loved the dystopia fiction genre, so it was quite a sharp turn for me last year when I first read a hymn for the wild built. The definition of cozy fiction, the Monk and robot duology is basically the opposite of post-apocalyptic fiction, it represents something of a Utopia fiction. It's a world that feels almost believable, almost too good to be true vision of a peaceful pastoral future where Humanity lives in harmony with nature and each other, having put war and greed and Corruption behind them.

I have fond memories of reading the first book last year, but it was not until cracking open the sequel, a prayer for the crown shy, that I really felt that tug in my chest Longing To live in the world Becky Chambers has created. I think a reason for it is that the first book primarily focuses on the relationship between the two main characters, but the second book explores a bit more in depth the concepts of the society which dex and mosscap live in.

I suppose these books will have their detractors which might criticize these stories as being shallow wish fulfillment, or low stakes pabulum oatmeal fiction. Maybe the reason I can Envision these criticisms is because at one point in my life I might have made them myself, but right maybe because of the state of the world this story is just so comforting in its ability to transport me to another reality and if it is like owed meal it is the most delicious bowl of oatmeal I have ever sat down to in a long time. If anything I just need a cup of warm tea to go with it.

Hi i just finished reading this book, absolutely heartbreaking. One question plagued my mind and that's why Lydia didn't ever write in her diary? I would think diary a safe place to put her inner plaguing thoughts. The only thoughts I could think was that she didn't want to acknowledge her feelings or she didn't want her mom to see it and make her feel disappointed (just like she hid her cookbook). Any thoughts about why? Am i missing something

Erich Fromm I looooove this man. I remember reading To Have or To Be and really enjoying it, though for some reason, I never finished it. Last Thursday I was at the bookstore, I stumbled across The Art of Loving and couldn’t resist. It only took me a day to finish, and what can I say? As always, Fromm has this incredible ability to explain life’s most complex truths with the clarity and simplicity of someone speaking to a five year-old. Yet, he leaves breadcrumbs of sources and ideas if you want to go deeper.

I’m translating the excerpts from French to English, so bear with me.

The book begins with a sharp observation: “For most people, the essential problem of love is to be loved, rather than to love.” He goes on to say, “People think that loving is easy, and that what’s difficult is finding the right object to love.” These lines struck a chord with me because so much of what Fromm wrote aligned perfectly with beliefs I already held about love. Love, as he describes it, is what saves us from the awareness of our own separation and the fear that comes with it.

For Fromm, love is an act of giving. But not giving in the way we often think about it in a capitalist society as something that drains or diminishes us. Instead, true giving is an expression of our vitality. It energizes us; it’s a sign of our inner abundance. Love is giving. It’s being responsible for another person while respecting their integrity. It’s the act of truly knowing someone.

That last part about “knowing” stood out to me the most. He explains that knowing another person is not about domination or force it’s an active, mutual process that can only happen within union. But, as he points out, so many of us (yes, I’m guilty of this) fall into a sadistic way of "knowing" forcing ourselves into someone else’s soul, rather than discovering it with them. Sometimes breaking them in the process.

Fromm goes on to describe different types of love, and there’s one line I keep coming back to: “If I truly love one person, I love all people, I love the world, I love life.” For him, love isn’t selective or conditional it’s a way of being, an orientation. And it requires faith: faith in humanity itself.

It’s such a profound little book, deceptively simple but filled with insights and again I LOVE Fromm ❤️

I'm reading James by Percival Everett. It's The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn told through Jim's eyes. I'm about 30% in, and I'm enjoying it.

Twain characterized Jim as a caricature, a superstitious fool. He's the butt of many jokes in the original story. This book posits Jim as highly intelligent and well-spoken. He uses slave speak in front of white people because he knows it's safer if they think he's an idiot. Awesome premise!

What confuses me is how well educated Jim is. He's not just smart; he's knowledgeable. He knows about Voltaire and Rousseau. He's incredibly eloquent with an amazing vocabulary, and no explanation has been provided thus far about how he gained all this knowledge.

It isn't realistic that he would be so well educated. My thinking is that Everett isn't trying to be realistic. He's putting Jim on the other extreme of complete idiocy as a fuck you to Mark Twain.

I would love to hear others' thoughts! What do you think Everett's intent is?

Edit: I don't understand why I'm getting downvoted? I used the spoiler tag, and I'm not saying anything outrageous. What's the deal?

I just finished yellowface (and absolutely loved it by the way!)

But has anybody noticed with the cover, when you have the book open and are holding up to your own face reading it, it makes you as the reader look like you are wearing it as a mask?

It almost feels like it could be a commentary on the insidious nature of what happens in the book (I don't want to post any spoilers) and how many of us may be complicit in this type of thing, without even realising.

I have no idea if this is intentional, but if so... Genius 🤯

Welcome readers,

The year is almost done but before we go we want to hear how your year in reading went! How many books did you read? Which was your favorite? Did you complete your reading resolution for the year? Whatever your year in reading looked like we want to hear about!

Thank you and enjoy!

For reasons I won't get into, I once spent Christmas Eve with a friend's family. I was quite young but can't recall how old. I felt super uncomfortable there not just because it was my first time at their home but because they seemed very proper and I kept thinking I was making a mistake the way I was eating food or the way I was answering a question or whatever.

Later that evening, my friend said we should be quiet now because her dad was gonna read from a book, which was one of their traditions. I thought this can't be good, expecting a slow reading of a boring poem I would not understand or perhaps a religious prayer that would go on for a long long time.

But instead he read sections from A Christmas Carol. What was most surprising to me though was how the father changed as soon as he started reading the book. He became so passionate, so animated, started doing voices, making faces, and this was totally captivating and it ended up being my favorite part of the night. I wished he'd continue reading. I was quite amazed at how different the father acted was when he read the story. Then he went back to being all proper and boring. He always read from that book, my friend said, because it was her favorite.

I later asked her what her father did and turns out he was a college prof and taught German literature.

Welcome readers,

Have you ever wanted to ask something but you didn't feel like it deserved its own post but it isn't covered by one of our other scheduled posts? Allow us to introduce you to our new Simple Questions thread! Twice a week, every Tuesday and Saturday, a new Simple Questions thread will be posted for you to ask anything you'd like. And please look for other questions in this thread that you could also answer! A reminder that this is not the thread to ask for book recommendations. All book recommendations should be asked in /r/suggestmeabook or our Weekly Recommendation Thread.

Thank you and enjoy!

And why didn't Mrs. Wilson buy Bill the puzzle for Christmas since she was well-off and he wanted it so badly?

I'm thinking maybe the jigsaw that he never got symbolises how he'd been brought up not getting what he wanted, which makes him empathise with the less fortunate. How popular is this interpretation?

And did they not buy it for him to teach him the value of things? I watched the movie after reading the book and in the movie it is sort of alluded to that Mrs. Wilson didn't believe he could finish the puzzle and that's why she didn't buy it for him, but I don't know how that would fit within the themes of the story.

I'd love to hear your two cents.

Edit: I'm thinking now that maybe Mrs. Wilson didn't buy him the puzzle because she believed it would be too difficult for him. He did mention at some point that he felt intimidated by women and how sharp and assertive they seemed to be in comparison to him. Maybe this is where it started, it continued for a long time, as we saw also by the effect his wife had over him, and it ended when he was at the convent and had this sudden feeling of confidence stemming from the realisation that he was a men among women (maybe referring to women not physically overpowering him, if it came to it). So maybe, Mrs. Wilson not believing he could finish the puzzle could fit a theme in the novel. Just a theory.

Just finished this fantastic book and wondered what people have surmised from the coin toss episode with the filling station proprietor.

In my mind, the detailed dialog clearly tries to hint at something beyond Chigurh being just your garden variety psychopath. Given specifics about the coin being from 1958 and having travelled 22 years to get there it could be about the inhumanity of neoliberal economic theory. Milton Friedman (one of the modern godfathers of neoliberalism) published his most famous paper "A Theory of the Consumption Function" in 1957 (which surely must have spread into public consiousness during the next year), whereas Ronald Reagan, who wholeheartedly adopted and began to implemented Friedman's worldview, became US president in 1980 (22 years later). This would also fit the three-generation theme in the book: Bell with his sense of duty and somewhat Keynesian vibe, Moss torn between the selfish greed of modern society and his fostered empathy and compassion, Chigurh being the cold instrumental view of humanity which prevails today.

Do you think the specific years mentioned bear any significance?

I like to reread books pretty often, revisiting ones that have stuck in my head a few years later. I recently reread Colorless Tsukuru Tazaki by Haruki Murakami and without meaning to, I guess I adapted having a strict but simple routine to cope with loss, much like Tsukuru. I first read it at a time I lost friends as well, but I didn’t intend to take it as an instruction manual.

When I was a teenager, after my first breakup ever I read Silver Linings Playbook by Matthew Quick (it was very popular with the movie coming out). Not by intention, but I allowed myself to deal with that breakup by acting emotionally like Pat Cooper, not recognizing as a 16 year old girl that Pat was an adult man struggling with bipolar. I now look back and see that I emulated him and that really wasn’t the takeaway of the book by any means.

There’s probably more examples but these two really stuck out to me. I should probably work on that, reading fiction has clearly developed my empathy since I identify with these characters so much. But I can’t use them as a blueprint either, even if Tsukuru is technically healthier than Pat. I know who I am in real life a lot more now but I still struggle with not integrating coping methods I read.

I’ve recently read a lot of nonfiction about marriage and healthy relationships, and I noticed I match better with the typical male characterizations of coping and conflict (not that there ever hard rules but generalizations exist for a reason) which I thought was unusual as a woman, but I think latching onto these two male characters might be a large part of why that’s the case.

Which characters or books have affected your real-life actions, positively or negatively?

Welcome to our weekly recommendation thread! A few years ago now the mod team decided to condense the many "suggest some books" threads into one big mega-thread, in order to consolidate the subreddit and diversify the front page a little. Since then, we have removed suggestion threads and directed their posters to this thread instead. This tradition continues, so let's jump right in!

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• The Management

Are there any sequels that initially when you heard about the made you think they were just blatant cash grabs, but ended up being actually good?

Like, for a book that seemed like a complete package, where adding anything more would just detract from it?

What do you think made it better than expected? Was it something that really needed to be a sequel to what it was a sequel for or could it also have worked as an independent book?