/r/TopsAndBottoms

Photograph via snooOG

Gay sex: what's hot, what's not, and how to do it better


Welcome to /r/topsandbottoms: the sub to talk about gay sex; what's hot, what's not, and how to do it better.

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Everyone with a chill sex-positive attitude is welcome here.


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Refer to our full rules for further information.

THIS SUBREDDIT IS ABOUT GAY SEX. NOTHING ELSE.


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/r/TopsAndBottoms

129,660 Subscribers

2

New Years Resolutions

I‘m eager to hear your sexual resolutions. And your opinion on mine:

My resolution is to only cum with another man this year. No jerking off solo this year. Do you think this is possible for a vers guy without a so?

4 Comments
2025/01/01
08:45 UTC

2

Feels like the dildo just hits a wall?!

I bought a new dildo recently that has the texture of real skin (almost) and I'm really happy with how it feels. It's a little bigger than average. I want to try to go past my second hole but I just can't. It feels exactly like hitting a wall and it pains when I do it. Can someone tell me what I'm doing wrong.

ps - I wanna practice enough before I take a real 🍆

1 Comment
2025/01/01
07:25 UTC

3

Tops/bottoms who like to keep your pubic area ultra smooth, what's your process?

Ideally I'd like to laser all my pubic hair off, but it'll be a long while before I'm comfortable with/financially capable of having a stranger shove a laser between my ass cheeks. So I'm trying to figure out a good shaving routine.

My goal is to have my anal and pubic areas as smooth as humanly possible as often as humanly possible. However, the few times I've tried giving myself a close shave down there have resulted in a lot of irritation, ingrown hairs, and general itching.

Just wondering what the best recommendations are for people who prefer to stay closely shaven.

3 Comments
2025/01/01
07:05 UTC

5

If a bathhouse doesn't provide lube, whose responsibility is it to bring one: the top or bottom?

12 Comments
2025/01/01
06:41 UTC

0

(19) Advice for first time bottom Prep?

I(19) am a virgin, and want to start prepping to bottom, I need to clean, but I don't know what else I need or should do. Is there a diet I need to be on or toys to use(if so, which toys and which website)? I also might want to top some time in the future. Do you have any advice for that as well?

3 Comments
2025/01/01
03:21 UTC

2

Vers guys, were you always vers?

Or you were a total top into butts only but with time become a vers, or were a total bottom into cocks and bottoming only but with time become a vers?

11 Comments
2025/01/01
01:20 UTC

11

Tops, do you eat extra servings of probiotics Whenever you eat ass out that day?

I've been doing so. So that I could avoid diarrhea. I had bad experience with rimming after eating out a dirty bottom. But I still love eating ass out, so now i've trying to strengthen my gut with extra probiotics.

1 Comment
2024/12/31
21:27 UTC

13

Thoughts on dildos?

What do you think: should dildos just be for solo play, or should they be part of regular fun between tops and bottoms?

As a dildo enthusiast myself, I am always surprised how many tops seem uninterested in using a dildo on me as anything more than “foreplay” or “prep” for fucking. I end up mostly using them for solo play, but I’m wondering if I’m just not finding the right playmates.

16 Comments
2024/12/31
16:16 UTC

38

2024 achievements and 2025 goals

Happy new year to all us tops and bottoms.

As we pull out of 2024 and slide into 2025, I wanted to ask what sexual aims did you achieve in 2024 that you're happy/proud of, and what goals do you have for 2025.

I'm so happy that i got to have my first anal orgasm in 2024, and since I had my first I haven't stopped since 😂😂.

For 2025 I have two main aims, the first is to indulge my tops watersports fetish. He confessed he had this kink to me and he's never got to try it with someone before. I haven't tried anything with watersports either but I'm determined that he's going to have a good time with it.

I also desperately want this to be the year that I get two guys topping me at the same time. My top is very open to sharing me, we just need to find the right person to invite into the bedroom. Hopefully by the end of the year I'll know what it's like to have one guy in my ass and one in my mouth at the same time.

Whatever your goals and hopes are for 2025 I hope they all cum true 😁😁.

33 Comments
2024/12/31
15:24 UTC

13

Do you feel like words like "slut" and "whore" only apply to bottoms/VB?

To me, it does. And I don't think it's a bad thing. If someone calls me a whore or a slut, I feel that it's too emasculating and degrading, and I"m perfectly fine if it's used for bottoms, but not for tops.

21 Comments
2024/12/31
07:48 UTC

59

How long should a bj last?

Curious from both perspectives. When I get blown I usually won’t cum for 15-30 minutes which I feel is a long time. And then if it’s taking a while I’m in my head that I am not cumming which makes it take longer. If you were blowing someone, would this bother you? How long do you usually last when getting a bj?

44 Comments
2024/12/31
06:25 UTC

15

All hookups desire intimacy

Most hookups I have is with guys where we discuss before that we will makeout , fuck and cuddle. Few hookups I have is with guys who are for pump and dump only or darkroom anon scene fuck and go. There is no expectation of intimacy in these hookups. However my observation with these hookups is when I am fucking them and I lay on their back and fuck them and my whole body is hugging theirs tightly , they love it. After I cum and collapse on them for few mins , they like it. They have asked me to come back again.

I am surprised that they advertised themselves and having ass up face down waiting for tops to fuck them doggy style with least skin to skin contact yet they enjoy the body contact but don't ask for it in their ad. They expect guys to treat them as a hole to use and get off but in reality them are all craving for human touch and intimacy. Do they think asking for intimacy would be offensive to some or sound too clingy ?

8 Comments
2024/12/31
03:57 UTC

16

Do you like it sloppy?

Tops do you like when the bottoms hole is sloppy and bottoms do you like when you’re sloppy?

7 Comments
2024/12/31
02:33 UTC

17

Sloppy or no?

Tops, do you like it when your bottom is giving you head and gets it really sloppy? Or does all that precum and spit turn you off? I ask because I have had a couple guys that didn’t like it sloppy

11 Comments
2024/12/31
01:46 UTC

65

What does it feel like when top hits your second hole

Never experienced a top hitting my sigmoid colon. Does it actually enhance the experience? Do it ever feel good or does it just hurt.

Tops do you notice a difference when you go in that deep? Does it feel better for you? Do your bottoms enjoy it?

24 Comments
2024/12/30
20:47 UTC

0

Bi tops:

Do you feel impotent bottoms suck dick better than women? And hard bottoms?

11 Comments
2024/12/30
11:07 UTC

25

Tops, what are your thoughts on cages and plugs?

If i showed up to a hookup caged and/or plugged, would it be a turn on or turn off?

13 Comments
2024/12/30
07:39 UTC

16

(18) is it normal that I constantly fantasise about dick

I’m a virgin freshly 18 and I can’t stop think about guys destroying me I’ve even nearly touched myself in public! Is this normal and can someone help

8 Comments
2024/12/30
04:12 UTC

5

(21) Advice for first time bottom prep?

Hi I (M21) I’m planning to hook up in the next few weeks. However I don’t really now what type of preparations should I make. Ik I gotta clean myself but idk what other type of preparations should I make: any diet tip? should I eat less or eat more of something? should I use a plug days before my hookup?

I would really appreciate some advice 😭😭 Thanks :3

6 Comments
2024/12/30
02:48 UTC

84

Why is everyone only into unprotected sex?

After exploring the online hookup space for a bit I'm a bit disappointed to learn that everyone only seems to be into "breeding". I am a bottom get rejected quite a bit by people because I push for condoms when hooking up. Why the obsession with high risk behavior?

68 Comments
2024/12/30
01:22 UTC

2

Shibari

Being kind of sub Im curious if anyone had tried traditional Japanese rope bondage/ suspension

3 Comments
2024/12/29
23:58 UTC

2

might want to hook up on a cruise

is it easy? hard? impossible?? i’m looking for on here but nobody seems to post my cruise.

9 Comments
2024/12/29
22:22 UTC

3

Do you prefer bottoms with more or no experience?

I’m a virgin and I always wondered when I get fucked would it be more fun for the top to fuck a tight and inexperienced hole or if they prefer that I had some experience with fingers or a dildo inside me

3 Comments
2024/12/29
22:20 UTC

1

Are tiny tops pr skinny top good at bed?

Hello i have a guy that wnat fuck me very good he is a tiny top 5’0 tall and weight 120 im not that much taller im 5,7 but weight 180 muscle guy i just wonder if any one had fucked by a small bottom and how was your experience! Also slim tops or small tops Tell me how you please your tall bottoms Or muscular bottoms And if they left satisfied and came back for more

9 Comments
2024/12/29
21:50 UTC

3

glp 1 medication top and bottom?

Hi i don’t know good question but what are the side effects or weird side of effects while taking this medication while you are top or bottom or both? what is routine to help relieve of any side of effects while taking this medicine?

4 Comments
2024/12/29
20:06 UTC

13

Pulling Out

Bottoms—how do you prefer your top pull out after a good pounding?

22 Comments
2024/12/29
19:45 UTC

26

I’m a submissive twink bottom who’s had serious erectile dysfunction for basically my whole life. Are there any tops who this is a turn on for?

30 Comments
2024/12/29
18:40 UTC

185

For us bottoms out there, lets be honest, prone bone and doggy are easily the best positions…

Prone bone is my favorite… the feeling of a top pushing his entire weight on me as he pumps my ass till he leaks into my hole is so rewarding and mentally intense; plus its an ideal angle, and I don't have to put in a lot of work, i can just lie down and enjoy his dick

67 Comments
2024/12/29
17:27 UTC

54

Do tops like seducing and convincing a shy or reluctant guy to bottom for them?

I am a masculine and stoic/shy guy, who generally is pretty reserved and tight-lipped. However, I love when a top knows this but takes actions to make me more horny, give-in a little, and bring out my slutty submissive side. I generally look like a standard bro next door, but love being treated like a real bitch in bed when I feel safe.

One great example is my neck. When it’s kissed I can’t stop myself from moaning at least a little bit, it basically short circuits my brain and makes me ready to fuck pretty quickly. If I continue to get kissed and the top gets on top of me, it’s pretty much over. My strong facade melts away and I get super submissive.

I’ve seen tops gets really turned on by this.

17 Comments
2024/12/29
17:22 UTC

23

Submissive bottoms :

I want know how you all started being submissive what triggered your brain to become submissive flr your top i know there’s a difference between a regular bottom and a submissive bottom im a total submissive bottom i completely surrender to my top desires but i want know what made u this way i gladly share my experience too

35 Comments
2024/12/29
15:54 UTC

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