Hi!

I’m 53, in good dad bod shape, masculine and all bottom. I’m also submissive and love to feel like “the woman” for a man. That includes cross dressing although I’m not passable. I’m also well educated and stable. I’m in California near SF.

I’m not a sissy and am quite shy. Love sports, outdoors, cooking and drinking good wine.

How do I meet a nice top guy to date and develop more of a relationship with? Just a good guy who takes me for who I am, and is all top.

Kiss and take me to your bed!

I think this subreddit really could be boiled (for the majority of us) down into the label “heteronormativity kink”. I think that is a label that at last finally describes my kink. “Dom/ sub” just doesn’t describe how my brain is wired, whereas “Heteronormativity” does. I understand it’s “toxic”, but I think that we might as well benefit from heteronormativity since we have to deal with it everyday at. Does “heteronormativity kink” jive with others here?

Do you like your bottoms smooth, trimmed or natural?

Just to complicate things I’ll qualify with body (torso and legs) vs. the fun bits (hole, cock and balls).

As a bottom, I really love being smooth from the eyebrows down; my entire body is so much more sensitive and alive to the top’s touch. Staying smooth is a pain tho, so the sparse body hair I have is usually trimmed down using a clipper and short guard.

My fun bits are always smooth, I want my hole inviting and OMG yes, it so so very sensitive that way, I want to feel everything he’s doing back there. Lube works better for me that way and no hairs to get caught. Even tho my cock and balls aren’t in play, I think they look much more bottomish entirely smooth too.

But of course I’m a bit of a pleaser, so what do tops prefer?

So here’s my situation, I’m bi-curious. Been entertaining the thought of bottoming for a top. But, here’s where i stand; checking out men in public is not my thing, if anything it grosses me out. I can’t picture myself sucking cock, kissing or allowing a top to humiliate me. I see most bottoms love to submit and get off by the idea that they’re pleasing the top..might sound a bit mean but I can careless in making sure I fully satisfy the top. Truth be told, I’m very infatuated with my own ass and really enjoy playing with it.. although compliments of my ass does turn me on.. I’m more into the idea of a man worshipping my ass.. where do I stand with these thoughts? Maybe my “dog” instincts also transfer over.. lol.. meaning, back then after I’d fuck women, I didn’t like cuddling or any of that stuff.. I would just leave and women would get offended and started labeling me as a dog..bust a nut a bounce..

It’s so tough to find good tops out here who can actually have a conversation and not just ask for my pictures. I mean , it’s so rare to find a top who wants to have fun conversations (including sext) and not just wank to my pictures 😫

Which subs would you guys suggest?

for the bottoms out there, i'm wondering if you're always 100% cleaned out after douching. i'm quite new to bottoming and quite a few times i haven't been completely cleaned. nothing alarming, just a spec or two, but sometimes i feel a tad lesser than compared to a lot of other bottoms who always seem to be squeaky clean, but i'm wondering if i'm being too hard on myself or if i'm setting my standards too high or if not being fully clean isn't as uncommon as i think...so what r ur guys' experiences like?

What attracts you to eat a hole :

1. Ass cheeks - Could be hairy/smooth/big/round whatever attracts you. You don't care how the actual hole looks like

2. Hole - You like it pink/tight/small. Not into big/sticking out holes ? You don't much care about looks of ass cheeks ?

3. You need to be attracted to both ass cheeks AND hole ?

4. You eat it regardless of how it looks as long as long as it is clean ?

Hey folks, I was wondering if anyone had any statistics on transmission rates of hiv from someone who is undetectable. We want to have unprotected sex. I’m on Prep and they are have an undetectable viral load. I’m ftm as well and will be using my front hole at the moment. I’ve had a bit of a look on google but haven’t been able to find that many statistics on transmission rates! Thanks !

So I've been sub/dom with guys depending on my mood or wants. I don't typically top, but I love getting a hold of a bottom to dominate. I had my ex eat my ass and worship me. I wanted to do so much more like have him use a toy on me and even cage him.

I went to a swingers place by myself earlier this year and spent a weekend with a couple. The bottom was nice and it was nonchalant the way I kissed on his man. I fucked his man (top) 3 times and I even slept in their bed and had his hubby spooning me the entire time. That hard morning wood felt so good. The bottom made breakfast and even dinner more than once. I want to do more and I'm beginning to kinda feel it as a personal kink. I notice a lot of guys are open, but many are just "okay" with it. I was a little upset because dominanting another bottom gets me going. It wasn't until about a month ago I realized I'm basically a Bottom Bull.

Even as a teen before I had experiences I imagined getting fucked but a different guy while my husband watched. Even find the man for me. It was weird bc I didn't even know the definition of any terms. So I felt in many ways I was kinda wired to be like this? When I started dating I was weirdly eager to tell men what I've done in the past with other guys thinking they would like it? I stopped obviously when it became clear my interests were different and plenty wanted to just either fuck or long term date.

I guess I'm making this post to come out again 😂 and maybe search for a few answers. Any bottoms like other bottoms pushing them around?

I am a straight male who is curious about bottom for the first time. My curiousness is coming from trans and gay porn. The look of pleasure on the bottom face is want ha made me interested. Where is the best place to fine a good top. Just looking for advice and someone to talk to

What’s your go-to playlist for gay sex, especially kinky or rough stuff?

Soundcloud, apple music, Spotify, etc. all welcome here, no playlists refused.

Here’s one of mine: https://music.apple.com/us/playlist/gtm-ff-2-1/pl.u-LdbqEo4s6EN20L

I have cumm hands free many times with my top who has a chrved up dick but all of them have been in missonary. The point is that I LOVE doggy and submitting my hungry ass to my top. But I can't cum hands free in doggy with his curved up dick.

Any tips to make it work out in doggy ?

I want to start bottoming as I am not stretched out at all down there. Can barely put a finger down there without my anus trying to close/clench up. It's also very painful. I'm looking for one of those kits with different size dildos. Maybe even a butt plug but not sure how that will go as I usually have a lot of flatulence with my stomach.

Perhaps I am searching the wrong keywords online such as Amazon but I can never find good results. It's usually just one dildo that is huge or one that looks uncomfortable. Let me know what links y'all can find. Thank you in advance.

I consider myself straight but lately the only porn I've had interest in are humiliation vids where women convince the viewers to suck cock take it in the ass etc. In some of the videos the girls puts pictures of cock on the screen and has viewers jerk to it. While watching I don't actually fantasize about sucking cock or taking it (if I ever did do anything with a guy it'd be the other way around) but these videos are so addicting and just hot. I cum to them almost every day now. Does it sound like I just like a unique category of porn or do I have some exploring to do?

We agree on everything, can reach each other's thoughts, he's incredibly cute, I love his family and every cherish experience we've had, but I can't stop thinking of exploring another man. He's actually my first relationship. I never believed in 'true love', rather building it so any issues we had when we were young I approached it to try and solve it. I kind of always thought of him as a perfect partner.

Except, I have such a need to gain more experiences. I feel like I just woke up and now I'm 30 all of a sudden. I miss everything I didn't do. Drugs, piercing, poppers, threesomes, going from men to men, late night city crawls, experimenting. Being in such a long relationship, has made me bored. Not that I ever was exciting. I do believe being in this relationship has brought me to my full potential. However, I can't help wonder what other guys feel like, smell like or taste like. We did have a discussion, and it might be a choice in the future. However, I can't get everything else out of my head.

For context I’m 18 and I’m planning on having sex with a guy from Grindr my same age.He is a fully fledged bottom and I don’t like things up my ass so of course I am the top.The thing is this will be my first sexual experience EVER,and I want to know how to make him enjoy it,how to make him have an orgasm and stuff like that.My dick is just 5 inches so I cannot count on size.So what do y’all recomend for a guy like me?Any technique?What positions are better to pleasure him?How do I hit that male g spot?What should I do during foreplay?He likes my deep voice so what should I say during sex? ANYTHING will help. I already asked him what he likes and doesn’t like and he just said that as long as he is the bottom he is down to anything.

I'm planing on bottoming for the first time next monday. He's got an 8" cock and I'm a bit scared of shoving it down my hole.

For reasons, we won't have much time, and since I'm closeted, I can't get a dildo to prepare. What are your gays recommendations?

PS: I've heard of a little tactic of shoving a ball of paper with lube into your hole for in-the-moment cleaning and lubrification. Anyone knows of it really works?

Tell your experience please. Love you!

I was recently invited to participate in a 3some. I have never done one before, but I've been wanting to. The thought of have 2 tops focus all their attention on me sounds so hot. So when I got this invite, I was pretty excited. As I got more details, I found out that there would be me and another bottom on 1 top.

I got weird about it and said I needed to think about it. Am I being too picky here? Should I go for it? Or should I wait for my first 3some to be my perfect one with two tops focusing all on me?

As a quick cumer myself I heard a lot of bottoms being on the same boat, is it more of the case or is it a minority?

Most guys I've been with (not that many) have been sorta shy with their dicks, and didn't really let me play around :(

Are most bottoms this averse over their cocks or am I just unlucky?

Only one has let me suck him off to completion, then I turned him around and did it again.

I have a dream of finding a bottom with a great cock, tie him up, ride him till I'm satisfied, then throat his cock while fisting his ass. Is that too much to ask?

Although I like top sometimes I love to bottom however when I do bottom I cream a lot, like an excessive amount to the point where it’s dripping down the top’s balls and running down his legs. I had a guy tell me once it’s too much and he is not into it. Do other bottoms experience this too? And tops.. do you find it a turnoff?

Good afternoon. Recently am figuring myself out and wanted to hear stories or thoughts from others... I have played with my ass before but not too big toys at all.. I guess my first question would be after your first time with someone how did you feel? Were you happy to do it? Did it hurt?

I guess my nerves are killing me and I dont know what to think... I just need to find the right person

I'm going to be going to Toronto soon and my hotel is close to two different bathhouses. I'm a closet bi from a really small town so I have never been to any type of gay bars let alone a bathhouse. I'm wondering what to expect? What do you do when you get there? What are the rules? What happens if I want to hook up with someone..

Also if anyone is from Toronto are they good there?

Ignoring the more extreme terrible hookups, what was some of the lesser reasons you blocked or ghosted someone?

I am mostly a bottom, but every time I've start dating someone they are also a bottom also, and I end up topping most of the time. My current boyfriend is a total bottom. We haven’t been together very long and I do like fucking him but I feel like I'm not very good at it and occasionally He does not rise. I feel like our sex is not very good and I know he's used to better.

I am young, skinny, not very tall, have an average dick, and am pretty flamboyant, and I feel like no one takes me seriously in a dominant position. It just comes a lot more naturally to me to be submissive because that’s how I identify. I also just don’t find ass nearly as attractive compared to dick.

At the same time, I really want to expand my sexual palate, not just for my boyfriend, but also in the future if we don’t last or open the relationship to have a lot more options. I used to be more vers, but as I've gotten older, I've gotten more nerves about topping due to some past relationship trauma and have become more and more of a pure bottom. This feels a bit silly, but any former bottoms have tips to enjoy topping more?

so, i just caved and signed up for X.

what are some of your favorite profiles to follow for bdsm and dom/sub content?

it would be awesome to escape some of the glossy fake studio stuff to find some real scenes with real men. pics are good and vids are better.

thanks for any suggestions or search tips!!