Just joined the 50+ club

Sorry for the current mess of the hair and outfit

Bought my first dress this week! I feel so cute and free!!

I just wanna see my dogs and be in my own space. I’m just losing my flair and everybody is saying my “sparkle” isn’t showing anymore, but I’m just so depressed being here, despite it being my own dang choice agh.

I’m recently divorced. I feel super lonely and down on myself most of the time.

But you wouldn’t really know it because I appear positive and polite in public.

I’m trying to heal and become stronger but it’s hard.

If you asked my younger self if I would ever do something like this, I would of said no! A photo?! Hell no! Online, double hell no!

It's a joy to see and feel the changes.

My running joke is that I have more therapy acronyms after my name that I do educational ones.

I've worked hard through childhood trauma/neglect via CBT, DBT, ACT (acceptance and compassion therapy), EDMR (eye movement desensitisation retraining), IFS (internal family systems) and lots of books (currently shadow self and inner child ie early memory and early encoded patterns).

The biggest thing I've learnt is that 1) often the negative feelings we have about ourselves is actually someone else's pain and 2) trial and error is a perfectly good enough route to changing how we feel about ourselves and life.

Is it hard? Absolutely. But is it impossible...nope.

Go gentle lovely people.

I am just feeling super burnt out and not really liking how I look in literally anything

I just decided to lean into my good beard genes and grow one. And it has partly solved my BDD. Like I used to get comments that I looked like a 40yo with 2 kids, and I saw myself as too old for my age. Now I look 27, but atleast it's better than 40 lol.

The other aspects like height (5'3 and the "6ft only" criteria makes me feel inadequate) are still there. And I think my whole system of me looking for self confidence is shaky because just one comment from any IRL person could destroy my newfound solution.

Since I got out of the hospital last month, I haven't felt like "dressing up" or putting on makeup. But we had a Friendsgiving today, and I did both. I hope I did okay. Can y'all let me know how I did?

Hello, everyone!

November was a rough month for me. Family members that I looked up to as a child were making negative comments about my appearance and would make me feel bad about the slightest things like eating ice cream for example.

This week, I decided to stick up for an acquaintance when people were bodyshaming her, and I found out that the acquaintance has labeled me weird (in a negative way).

I just felt like I don't fit, and I cried a lot this week.

Any positive words would be greatly appreciated. I just turned 39 and I’m at all-time low. I haven’t been able to work for the last year and a half due to medical problems. My mom died recently and I’m having a really hard time getting through it depression and anxiety is getting so bad. I just spent Thanksgiving getting made fun of by some of my family. That’s also why I look so bad. I spent the rest of the day crying.

Sorry, didn’t include username before. But according to rateme I’m a hideous hag who looks at least ten years older than I am (33f today). No makeup, no Botox or work done, and yeah my apartment has shitty lighting so minimal light adjustment to try and balance shit.

I’ve always thought I was average. Even below average. But goddamn did rateme try to kill my self esteem.

I’ve spent years working outside, hauling canoes and kayaks, teaching people how to survive in emergency situations. I wear sunscreen and exfoliate and moisturize, but when you’re doing days in the backwoods with no cellphone signal and only yourself and inexperienced others to rely on, you aren’t carrying that shit. Water is more important than moisturizer, Karen.

I’ve done my best by my fair skin tone and never get burnt. But god forbid I have laugh lines because I’m a joyful person. That must mean I’m lying about my age by 10+ years.

People are so warped by excellent filters and good plastic surgery. They have no idea what real looks like, especially online. It’s both depressing, since I feel like I must be ugly, yet pathetic, because these people are cluely not in touch with real people.

Anyway. Roast me. I’d like to be toasted but at this point I don’t expect it.