Jakes, Brothers, Men,

I write to you all today with a warm heart. Recall with me on this fine day, April the 26th, on all the wondrous days us Jakes have inhabited the Earth. From the Protozoa era, when we lived closely with the dinos, to the Renassaince, when we assisted Caeser with the design of the city of Florence and assisted Michaelangelo in the painting of the Sistine Chapel, to today, where we played an integral role in the creation of a successful Covid-19 vaccine.

We, Jakes, walk the Earth, giving our lives for the greater good of our species and humanity, living our lives in the dark and in secret to keep our identities unknown. I SAY NAY.

NAY, today we must bring the people to open their minds to the existence of us Jakes.

NAY, we shall reclaim our identity as the leaders of gods and men.

Nay brothers, I say Nay. Today is the day the songs will tell about. Today is the day we rally together, arm in arm, for the greater good of us Jakes and for the betterment of our species.

Today, we live, as One, as Jakes.

That is all

Is everybody here Jake and not Jacob?

People bringing it up around me just makes me wanna die, since it used to be good. Now they just think it’s funny cuz haha haha his name is Jake like how tf do u think that’s the part that people thought was funny

Is not jake. Your all jake the fakes to me. Back flake jakes. Big mistake jakes, your mothers shoulda aborted you instead.

This shit will put me in therapy

They did it. Those assholes from State Farm did it again. They brought him back. Jake from State Farm. Whyyyy???? People were starting to forget about that khaki wearing fuck and they brought him back!!! I just want my name back and for State Farm to fuck off once and for all.

Hi, just joined this sub. Anyone else here just go by Jake but their real name is Jacob?

I am living in Scotland right now, what about you guys?

These are peaceful times in the land of Jakes and AntiJakes, and the empire is prospering. Take advantage of the peace before war against r/AntiJakes inevitably rises again.

Do not let r/jakeneutrality into your houses. They might be spies.

Please to Jake your acquaintance.

I have just got to know through sources embedded deep that there is are spies amongst us. These individuals are a risk to us & our great master Jake in whose cloth we are all cut. We need to find aforesaid individual or individuals before they destroy the very fabric of our loincloth. And Jake forbid, they get to Jake himself. No secret cabal worth its name can do without a witch hunt. So let the festivities begin.

People that say this should commit the big die. That fucking commercial has damaged our reputation of being young savages by replacing our name with some basic fucking white guy with khakis. I’m fired up about this. They anger me.

We shall make it to 1,000 in the future my brothers

Jambajuicejakey is here to help

Hello fellow Jakes and non Jakes. There’s gotta be some cool nicknames out there (Jakehammer). I’d love to hear some suggestions.

We are not with you nor against you. A new faction rises. r/jakeneutrality NOW!