(Apologies in advance for any ignorance, I've never owned a cat before but I really want to help.)

Hi Reddit, so I'm in a long distance relationship and my partner is having a bit of a problem and kinda needs advice.

So my partner, K (21F) has an adult cat, Patches (10F) who she found a few years ago on her property. This cat is extremely dear to us, and the feeling is mutual.

Recently, K found an abandoned kitten, Lupin (M) on her property and has been taking care of him until he can be re-homed. The issue with this is that Patches seems to hate Lupin. She ran away from home the first day he was there and didn't come back til at least 24 hours later, to which she then avoided my partner anytime Lupin was around.

Today she was willing to be in the same room with Lupin, but she was very aggressive and actually left a pretty deep scratch in-between K's fingers.

K seems to be struggling with this whole situation and I want to help, but I've never had a pet cat so I'm completely stumped on how to help.

Any advice on how to get these two to co-exist?

Hi, I'm looking for any advice that people may have with border collie herding behaviour?

My family and I rescued a nearly 2 year old male border collie a couple of weeks ago.(We've had a collie in the past so are not new to the breed) When he came to us he was very underweight as he was unwell and shy/nervous but very quickly warmed up to us. Within 2-3 days he had the biggest transformation, was a complete cuddle bug, gentle and affectionate as well as being super easy and fun to train.

He met a couple of people and seemed to be okay with it however, about 2 weeks in he started to get nervous and that turned to reactivity. He's started nipping at strangers heels when they come in the doorway, at first it was just mouthing and running away but recently he properly bit a friends heel.(only seemingly reactive when people walk in the door as on walks/in public he hasn't a care for other people/animals/distractions)

I don't know what to do as we talked to the vet who said that it's a breed behaviour (which we knew before) but that it's only going to get worse and we should just think about rehoming him already. I've read about introducing them to people through first having him in a crate and we have bought a muzzle for him per the vets recommendations.

I was wondering if anyone would have any advice or recommendations from experience before? Can you train the nipping behaviour out of them? Any ideas if it is a territorial, boundary thing? Any and all advice would be greatly appreciated 🙏🙏

A few months ago my mom purchased a White German shepherd and he's always hiding, eating/drinking only when nobody is around, and is jumpy to every sound near him. My mom is tired of him doing his business in her room and wants him to go outside but he refuses to move anywhere outside of his kennel. I don't want to force him out. How can I build trust with him?

We rescued a Japanese spitz (5 year old) last November and been a part of the family ever since. She was rehomed due to her previous owners not having enough time to care for her, and she's been a cuddly ball of fluff since. No issues with potty or eating at all since the beginning of time.

The only issue we have is that she seem to only communicate through barking excessively. We have another Japanese spitz (resident doggo, 3 yrs old) that we got as an 8 week old pup and he doesn't bark as much, only when he gets startled, playing or when someone is at the door, plus he stops when we say "quiet" or stop. Meanwhile she (rescue) always barks.

We've been working on her commands (with sternful ways of doing it) but she doesn't seem to improve at all. Its not an immediate issue at the moment as we can tolerate it, thankfully our neighbours haven't complained either, but I'm wary now as I am currently pregnant but will never ever consider rehoming her.

Just worried that it's not going to get better and my future baby (and future self) will have regular disrupted sleep everyday. Do you have any tips on how to handle or better train your furbaby to be quiet on command?

She used to love being outside.. sometimes would just sit out there and look into the distance or just lay down next to the door... ... recently I put a cone on her due to her chewing from allergies. she was still going outside for the first week or so. but now she'll go to the door but she wants to go outside, I open the sliding glass door, and as soon as the door opens, she packs away after looking outside like she spooked. but she'll be totally ok going on walks. i even tried going outside with her and she was VERY cautious and hesitant. i did get her to go out on a harness... but it took a little pulling and she peed, to which i praised her and gave her a treat. id rather not have to wake up an extra 45 min than i already do to take her for an AM walk, but i will cause i love her... but i have a house with a fenced in yard just for her lol.

anyone have any ideas on how to get her back to loving the freedom to run around?

I really don’t know where else to post this but we got my puppy when she was 6 months old from the shelter and slowly introduced her to our 6 year old cat and they got along fine and were cuddle buddies and didn’t really play fight which I was worried about. Now she is a little over a year old and has tried to bite our cat multiple times and tries to chase her. We have resorted to separating them by floors with the cat upstairs and the dog on the main floor but we would like our pets to be friendly again. My husband and I both work hybrid with alternating days and the dog gets walked multiple times a day and has a backyard to play in. We try to spend time with both the pets and work off some of the energy but even when tired the dog will still chase after the cat.

What caused the sudden change in behavior and how do we work on it? Note we are not giving up either pets and will keep them separated by floors if we have too but my husband and I would prefer a more concrete solution.

i always find little toys or small pillows carried around the house and its definitely my cat playing with them but ive never actually seen him do this and ive only seen him carrying stuff in his mouth a couple times. he only does it when we're not looking!! why is he shy or secretive? could it be an anxiety thing? i dont really know how to tell him its okay since i cant encourage him lol

It's the best way I can describe his behaviour. He keeps biting different parts of my arm. My wrist, hand, fingers or any part of it. Then when he bites it he holds it and starts licking at it, before letting go and trying a different spot. When I nudge him off or pull him away (the bites can be quite strong and painful) he makes a sad noise and instantly lunges after it. I finally managed to stop him by hiding under my blanket and he jumled to the water, drinking a lot of it.

I really dont know what this behaviour means and it's worrying me a bit

We recently adopted a 2-year-old German Shepard from a rescue. Before we took him home he went to the vet and was neutered. Once we got him home he was loving his new backyard and pranced around the entire yard and seemed to love his big yard. He loves to be pet and just loves being near us. 2 days ago he suddenly won't leave the patio in the backyard. I took him for a walk and he will walk in the grass and if I take him on the leash in the front yard he has no problems. But if I try to use the leash in the backyard he just wants to go back on the patio or sit by the door. One of us our always out there with him and didn't notice anything startle him or that might have hurt him at all. How can I find out what the issue is without making it worse?

Hi yall,

me and my roomate do not know what to do about our two new cats, they hate each other so much and we're both afraid that they will never get along. My cat is a 3 year old male tabby and my roomates in a 5 year female Devon rex / sphinx cross. The tabby is probably about double the size of the devon rex, so were afraid that she is going to get hurt.

We did the whole thung of keeping them seperate and letting them both explore the house individually and on their own time. We kept them completely seperate for a week and then introduced them visually to one another. Eventually we let them both walk around while supervised, but everytime the devon rex tries to move anywhere, the tabby runs up on her and attacks her. We try to let them out as much as possible around one another, but everytime it ends up in the tabby trying to attack the little one. The tabby also always tries to go into the devon rexs room to eat all her food and do who knows what. Its been a month now of the same shit and we both do not know what to do. I ordered the phermone thing that plugs into the wall to try to keep them both calm, but that also doesnt seem to do anything.

if you have any tips on what to do, wether that be how to discipline the male when he is acting aggressive or how to redirect his mean feeling about his new sister. we are at a loss, please help!

This dog keeps on pinning down cats and kittens by the neck and dragging them across the ground. I'm fairly certain it killed a ginger kitten although my brother said the cat was hit by a car but someone it ended up in the ditch 10ft away. I don't really believe it I'm fairly certain it killed the kitten. It breaks my heart to see this happen to such beautiful little animals. It also chased off about 6 of the cats in the space of a few months. The kittens were tiny and malnourished too.

Hello! I have a weird (benign) behavior I wanted to ask about for curiosity's sake, as I just think it's kinda funny. Basically, my sister's dog eats very leisurely over the course of hours—UNLESS I am in the room. Then she eats at a normal speed (not too fast).

My mom has been a dog trainer for 40+ years, so I've grown up with an above average knowledge base on dog behavior, but I really can't logic this one out. It'd make sense if she was MY dog, I think, but I'm easily the least "dog person" in our 3 person household (me + sister + mom), spend the least amount of time interacting with them, etc, so it just surprises me that I'm the one that motivates her to eat? My mom and sister have even tried hand-feeding her, and she's just not interested in more than a few kibbles unless I'm there.

In case it helps: my sister's dog is a 1 year old female poodle/golden retriever mix (about 70% poodle). Not spayed, and the phenomenon has been going on about as long as we've had her (10 months). She LOVES all of us, including me, and gets super excited to see me whenever I emerge from my room after work or for breaks. She even picks up her kibbles and shows them to me before eating them, just like her toys. (Well, minus the eating, obviously.)

I don't think it's a bad thing, she's not too skinny and still eats most of her food, just much slower. I was just curious if anyone has ideas on why a dog might do this? Thanks!

I have an 8 year old female chihuahua mix, who is non-aggressive. (Leia)

A few months ago, my son found an abandoned kitten in our driveway. The kitten was only about 4 weeks old, and he needed to be nursed back to health. He was dehydrated and too young to be off milk. We named him Pete.

Leia took to Pete pretty much right away, and they snuggled and played all day.... until just a couple of days ago. I didn't see this happen, but according to my son Leia & Pete had a big fight. Pete was so scared he sprayed all over & pooped too.

Leia is currently in heat, and I had caught her trying to hump Pete a few times before. Could this be what traumatized Pete?

Now Pete freaks out whenever he sees Leia. Leia doesn't know any better and keeps trying to approach him.

We have been keeping them in separate rooms since the big scuffle, but this can't go on forever.

Does anyone have any advice on how to get Pete to be friends with Leia again? I don't want to keep either of them locked up in bedrooms all day everyday.

Additional information: neither pet is fixed. Pete has his appointment scheduled for the first week of September. Leia will have a much longer wait, as the clinic doesn't have any availability for dogs until December.

I would very much appreciate any tips you can give me on how to bring peace back to my critter children.

We had 2 female dogs and 2 male dogs. 1 female was extremely attached to one of our males. Inseparable. This female and male are both 8yesrs old. We have another female( 3yrs) who was typically just a relaxed dog, but over the past few days has been more around the one 8yr old male. The older female over the past couple days has seemed sad, but no other signs of anything and we’ve been trying to see what’s going on. Today, I left for work at 0700, and at 0800 I got a call from my husband that the older female killed the younger female and the only reason I can think of is because of her being insecure about her position in the pack feelin threatened. My question is, what do we do next. We have 2 young children, and if it’s because of attention, next she could go after my children. Do we rehome her? Do we euthanize her? I need some type advice. I know no one can make this decision but us but frankly I’m devastated about one dog. My children don’t know she’s gone yet, and not knowing if they may need to say goodbye to the other dog that they love I’m not sure my heart can handle a blind decision with no kind of input.

Hi, I'm Ash. I have problems with my back and what seems to do best to relieve it is bengay. I just put some on and I went to pick up my cat and she flipped out and isn't coming near me. Is there a psychological reason my cats acting this way. Is it the smell. She now comeing up to me giving me a wiff but seems oddly skittish. This isn't normal. I'm just curious why my is like this.

I have three dogs but there are 5 dogs in total. My "puppy" is 2 and is like 75 pounds no bigger then a heeler and my chihuahua are having issues. They get a long pretty well the chihuahua is kind territorial like hell growl when he's laying down if any of the dogs come near him but other wise he plays well with them and he especially loves when the big dogs play tug of war with him. Unfortunately whenever my puppy becomes agitated when people come downstairs or enter the house he attacks my chihuahua never any of the other dogs just him my chihuahua also becomes agitated by these things so I don't know if the puppy attacks him because he's also barking but my roommates dogs also bark and he doesn't go after them either I really don't know what to do and am becoming nervous for my chihuahuas health. We've had the chihuahua since 2017 and the puppy since 2022

I have a male cat (ASH) and male dog (chihuahua mix), and I’ve noticed a weird trend between them. They sleep in bed with me at night sometimes, but I’ll on occasion wake up to the feeling of movement. I’ll turn on my lamp or flashlight and see them rolling around together, biting, nipping, kicking, whacking, all that. The thing is: they’re almost completely silent when this happens. There’s no barking or hissing or growling or anything. They dont draw blood, but the chihuahua does bite at the cats face sometimes. I separate them when I can, but they keep going after each other. Is this normally how cats and dogs play or should I separate them?

I have a 7 month old pointerxhusky pup penny and lately every time I put her in the crate she starts ENDLESSLY crying and so loud too she never used to be this bad, it’s making me feel like something is wrong. We have to put her up every now and again because she’s not getting along with her sister because of how territorial and dominant she’s wanting to be which milly has proved several times that Penny is not top dog and Penny is just not grasping it well. we are training them on this and until they are fully trained they can’t really be trusted to be around each other at all right now. Is there anything I can do to make her feel more calm or if there’s something I missing is she maybe not feeling good and that’s why she’s being so consistent every single time I put her in the crate? She’s been doing this for the past month and a half, I’m also worried about my neighbors as well as Penny bc they aren’t used to my pups being so loud at a consistent rate. I don’t wanna be this frustrated but it’s so hard when you can’t tell what they want because sometimes I’ll let her out and it’s because she had to go tot he bathroom but other times it’s not so I can’t tell whether or not it’s necessary for her to come out when she’s screaming constantly. She’s never in there long she does it immediately when I put her up. Any advice?

Hello,

I am currently 30 weeks pregnant and my dogs are terrorizing my house. My husband and I have 2 dogs, both are rescues one being 3 year old female husky and the other being a little under 2 male husky, German Shepard, Alaskan malamute mix. Behaviors they had when we first got them seem to be resurfacing and getting worse as I get further along. The male started a few weeks ago and the female is just now starting. Behaviors include:

• Chewing furniture
• Peeing inside
• Dumping automatic water bowl and trying to chew it

I don’t know what to do at this point to correct them. They have a bunch of toys so I don’t know why our furniture (specifically dining room chair legs and cushions) are their target. They have a doggy door so they have access to the outside 24/7. My husband is away at school Monday-Thursdays so it’s just me taking the brunt of it.

I have a just over a year old female Boxer Bella. We got her at 8 weeks old, shes well socialized with humans and dogs alike. Our neighbour and friend in our townhouse complex got one of her sisters, Millie about two weeks later. We've had numerous play dates and they are crazy together. Since about March we've been taking Millie to the dog park when we take Bella. Our friend is older with health issues so isnt able to get out much. She also has an older Australian shepard. So Millie in the beginning was Bella's shadow, however she has really come out of her shell and now makes doggie friends on her own.

The thing is, is that when we have Millie over at our place, they just play and play and play. To the point we have to seperate them, it appears our Bella is more of the aggressor for playing. We also sometimes have her overnight but after last weekend, we dont think we can do it anymore, cause they just wont stop. We tried seperating at night and all they do is whine cause they cant be together. We get No sleep. We would love her back over for the night, cause we love Millie too and it helps our friend as well. How normal is this? What can we do to make them calm down? Especially at night.

Need advice.

my partner and i just adopted a 3 month old puppy. all he will do is pace or run in circles no matter how much space he is given in our home. if he has the whole house to roam, he goes to one spot and paces. if he is confined to one room, he is pacing and looking for a way to get to his normal pacing spot.

he is also scared of us. wont let us touch him. imagine a feral dog out in the streets dodging everyone trying to catch him. that’s this puppy. even if we arent approaching him. we are not trying to stress him out. we wont chase him. we’re trying to just let him relax and do his own thing. he doesnt react to toys or us calling him. just pacing.

we purchased him from a breeder. my suspicion is that he was confined in a small space or kennel all his life and has not had any/much human interaction at all.

would love any opinions/advice. thank you.

Hi all,

Thanks in advance for reading this. We currently have three pets residing in our household and are in need of some advice. Ideally, we would like them all to peacefully coexist under the same roof, but we also understand that this might require a lot of work or it might just never work out. However, for the sake of their well-being and for my (and my fiancé's) sanity, we’re willing to give it a try. Anyway, here is a little bit of background information on the three pets we have:

Nikki – Female Cat

• Breed: American Shorthair
• Age: 15 years old
• Personality: Mellow, sweet, gentle, will not harm another soul.
• History: My fiancé initially got Nikki when she was just a kitten about 15 years ago. She was raised in the 3-story townhouse that we’re currently living in (Michigan). She used to have free reign over all of the living areas as she was the only pet in the house. Back in 2019, my fiancé moved to Nevada for work, and Nikki stayed behind in Michigan and was well taken care of by my fiancé’s parents.

Meow – Female Cat

• Breed: American Shorthair
• Age: 5 years old
• Personality: Independent, stubborn, feisty, will get very aggressive when other pets or strangers are present.
• History: My grad school roommate and I adopted her back in 2019. I don’t know the full details, but apparently, she was abused by the previous owner when she was just a kitten, which would explain her easily-aggravated behavior. Additionally, I don’t believe she was fully socialized with other kittens before we got her. Consequently, she can “play” pretty rough, often drawing blood during play sessions. Lastly, her combative temper means that the only time she gets her nails trimmed is during the annual vet visit, as I am unable to simply “hold her down.” She has mellowed out just a tiny bit since her younger days, but a lot of my friends who are also cat owners are often shocked by how aggressive she is compared to other “normal” cats.

Gnocchi – Male Dog

• Breed: Aussie-Doodle Mix
• Age: 3.5 years old
• Personality: Energetic, playful, curious, will get extremely jealous when he’s not getting 100% of our attention. Lately, he’s been exhibiting aggressive behavior towards other dogs and humans.
• History: While living in Nevada, my fiancé picked up Gnocchi during COVID in 2020. For the first two years, he was the only pet she had while living alone in Nevada. Strangely, when Gnocchi was still a puppy, he didn’t exhibit any alarming signs of aggression towards other felines or dogs. Recently, though, he’s been very aggressive towards other animals as well as other people we run into on our walks.

With the brief intro out of the way, now comes the first problem we’re facing. In 2022, my fiancé moved back to Michigan and returned to the same house that Nikki grew up in. Consequently, Gnocchi now occupies the first floor of the townhouse, whereas Nikki’s territory has been relegated to the basement. When Gnocchi first moved in, we put up a little gate to restrict his access to the basement in order to keep the pets separated. Additionally, we tried slowly introducing them through positive reinforcements (treats) and following some online YouTube videos. However, a year and a half in, Gnocchi is still unable to tone down his aggression towards Nikki. Every time we head down to the basement and close the metal gate behind us, Gnocchi starts barking out of jealousy and furiously runs back and forth on the first floor in protest. Every chance he gets, he barks and growls at Nikki through the little metal gate. Until recently, Nikki has been fairly good at avoiding Gnocchi and staying out of his way whenever she feels like venturing outside of the basement. However, just earlier this week, during one of Nikki’s out-of-basement excursions, Gnocchi managed to chase her down and bit her on the thigh. Luckily, the bite wasn’t too deep, but she did seem a bit shaken. So, we’re currently at a loss as to how we can mend this relationship.

Now backtracking a little bit. Before my fiancé brought Gnocchi back to Michigan with her in 2022 and when I was living by myself with Meow in a separate apartment, we thought about introducing Meow to Nikki first—in hopes that the two of them would form a bond before we introduce both of them to Gnocchi. Thinking this was probably the best way forward, I picked up Nikki from my fiancé’s parents and brought her back to the apartment that I was living in. I then tried following Jackson Galaxy’s cat introduction videos as closely as I could. This included mostly scent swapping and positive reinforcement training through feeding (no visual contact) for the first 1.5-2 weeks. I thought everything was progressing well, so I proceeded to the physical contact phase by removing the barrier between them. Unfortunately, this was when all hell broke loose. After making eye-contact, Meow proceeded to go berserk and latched onto Nikki, viciously attacking her with all her claws out (keep in mind that I’ve never been able to trim her nails without sedation at the vet). I had to physically break up the fight, and poor Nikki scurried away and went into hiding for a few days. After this incident, I was too scared to try introducing them again, so I returned Nikki to my fiancé's parents. To me, this relationship also seems a bit beyond salvaging.

Fast forward to a couple of months ago when I moved in with my fiancé, we now have the full ensemble living under the same roof—with each pet occupying their own segregated territory on each floor. Meow has one of the second-floor bedrooms all to herself as I am too afraid to introduce her to Gnocchi for the first time or reintroduce her to Nikki for the second time. As mentioned before, Gnocchi has all of the first-floor space to himself. Lastly, Nikki stays in the basement for the most part.

So dear Reddit, is there any sliver of hope left to make our pets get along with each other? Or do you think we’ll be stuck in this 3-way Mexican standoff forever? My assumption is we should probably try correcting Gnocchi’s behavior first and possibly Meow’s as well (if possible). We welcome any input as to where/how we can start to undergo some behavior training. Alternatively, we’ve been contemplating hiring one of the local animal behaviorists to assist in this situation, but those are incredibly pricey, so I thought I would post it here first. Apologies for the long post; there’s still a ton of minor or less relevant information that I left out for the sake of keeping this post shorter. If you would like any additional information regarding the pets, please just let me know. I’d be happy to provide it.

Thank you!

Gnocchi

Nikki and Meow when I tried introducing them

I understand that as dogs get older (in this case, he's 16), they can have issues like controlling their bathroom habits (much like old adults humans can), but this one just seems odd to me.

I have a dog door for my dogs and my old man dog knows how to use it and uses it daily. Despite his old age, he's able to go up and down stairs just fine. He's a bit slow and more lethargic than he was when he was younger, but still will play with his younger sibling here and there.

A month or two ago, he started urinating in the house. I don't mean dribbles, but full release of his bladder. Only in specific areas (My dining room floor and my Kitchen floor, the latter that he knows he's not allowed to enter the space, but does it anyways to urinate. He still goes outside for his bowel movement and he doesn't piss on the carpeting. Only the fake wood floors in both of those locations. The dining room is more the linoleum style, so its getting in between the seams/underneath and causing the joints to curl up and my spray cleaners are not able to penetrate down into the sub floor to remove the smell which makes it that much more inviting for him to urinate there.

I don't understand why he suddenly changed his habbits to pee indoors daily despite him having access to outdoors 24/7 and going outdoors to do his other business. Has anyone else in this group had this issue with older pets? I could understand an accident or two, but he clearly is intentionally urinating in the house daily and no longer doing it outside.