I don't know what to do. I want to stop thinking this way. I just have such dirty minded thoughts for whcih I don't have nay control over and I try to forget them buy CANT What do I do. Please help. It has gotten so worse...

I'm not married. Why do I keep having urges to have sex? Why can't these thoughts go out of my head and stop. What do I need to do to stop them I never used to be like this growing up.

This has got out of hand i can feel the beast in me when ever i pull back the the addiction gets very strong

to the point i pull my kurta and scream form the inside. but still relapse. i going to do a 7 day fast on the soul to get back to Allah

Assalamu alaykum i wanna talk to some brother for Counseling Does any brother reading This have any experience in counseling / Mentorship I need To Talk to some brother I have many stuff going on In my life

I don’t have close Friends And I DONT really Tell my Personal stuff Too much To my Family

Jazakallah

Assalamualaikum I've got a really important question that I'd like to know the answer to

If semen drops onto my finger, and under a tap I wash my hand with water to make that area pure (where the semen has dropped onto)

And the pure running water that's dropping onto my hand from the tap goes onto my wrist or some of my arm whilst I'm washing the impurity off does this spread the impurity making my wrist or arm impure?

I’ve been battling this porn mess for a while now, and I finally found a tool that really clicks for me: a website blocker. Like, it seems simple, but it changed everything! I can't even access those sites now, and it’s honestly a huge relief.

I also started praying more and keeping myself busy with work and sports. Taking that step to block access helped me clear my mind. Anyone else tried blockers? What else has worked for you? I need all the help I can get!

The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said, "O Allah, bless my nation in their early mornings." (Sunan Ibn Majah 2236)

The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said, "One should not sleep before the night prayer, nor have discussions after it." (Sahih Bukhari 574)

The shitty feeling you have at night after a long day at work and you want to 'relief' yourself is not felt on the mornings when your mind and thoughts are fresh.

Last night instead of being alone I decided to be in company with other people and guess what? I didn’t relapse. For a short while I’m giving up on being alone with free time unless absolutely necessary because I’m almost always going to relapse. Its just not worth it.

Every storm comes after wonderful weather with a clear sky.

And slowly, the air starts gently moving the leaves and gathering the rainy clouds. And everyone gets ready to enjoy the rain.

Little to know, those aren't just some rainy clouds, but they're the clouds of despair. Came to extinguish the light of hope and drown all kinds of motivation and positive feelings.

This is my story with the digital poison (po*n)

When I was at the beginning of middle school, a lot of the boys had a new way Of measuring manhood. A new way to join "the cool kid's group"

And that way was bragging about the longest po*n video you ever watched, or how many times you can masturbate in one day.

As a kid who didn't want to be shown as weak and less manly than others, I decided to do it for the first time (keep in mind that I haven't hit puberty yet)

As a kid, a simple YouTube video was more than enough to turn me on.

Covering in sweat, my heartbeat is racing, and a dopamine rush hits my brain hard.

"Wow, what is this?

This is an amazing feeling that I haven't experienced before"

I had that weird mix of pleasure and proud, thinking that I'm now a true man and allowed to join " the cool kids' group"

Yet, something was odd,

"How are these capable of watching all these videos that they're telling stories about?

What are those websites?

How can I find them?"

I kept asking myself, without telling anyone to not scratch my "manhood," I thought.

And since YouTube is not a po*n library, I got bored of it quickly.

And I just felt the desire to do this thing once or twice every 6 months.

Until the beginning of high school

I don't exactly remember how I discovered this thing called "VPN"

I installed a random VPN app and started searching...and It's like I discovered a new side of the internet.

A side I shouldn't have seen.

A door I shouldn't have opened.

"Wow, that's a lot. All these videos and pictures, I can finally enjoy them"

My heart starts dancing; my mind starts exploring for enjoyment and pleasure...

But my soul...my soul slowly and slowly started to distort.

Little did I know...all that unhealthy dopamine and poisoned pleasure...

Was just the beginning of a storm that I couldn't expect.

From doing it once or twice every 6 months

To do it every day

From just a 1 minute or 2 of YouTube video was enough

To Spend hours and hours a day on multiple videos

Slowly and slowly, the storm drowned me into...

The bottom of despair.

At that time I woke up

When I was no longer capable of breathing, and being a prisoner of the po*n jail.

When I was no longer capable of smiling or tasting the enjoyment of life.

When I was forced to wear an invisible mask of shame, trying to be a good person while hiding behind that mask of who I actually am.

I opened on myself the gate of hell

Letting the deadliest poison run in my soul.

It's been 7 years now since I reached that bottom of despair

7 years of battling against my own self

7 years of trying and errors

7  years of being trapped under this storm, not being capable of seeing the light of hope.

But...This ends today.

Throughout my journey of trying to quit this habit, I figured out that To change, I have to not focus on quitting po*n.

But I need to change my entire day.

And watching over all the tiny activities and triggers that might lead to watching po*n or masturbating.

Now, I'm learning a new skill. And I'll dedicate all my free time to learning it. And build a whole new routine.

I will start documenting my journey every day and sharing all the changes.

And I'd like to have someone to go with me on this journey.

Someone who does not just want to quit po*n but is also trying to invest their time into building something useful and meaningful.

So, if you're interested and serious about breaking free of this prison, learning new skills, or just investing in your time wisely

Just let me know, and let's do it together.

I wish you all the best and hear your po*n-free story in the future.

See you tomorrow

I did not fap yesterday. I was fighting this habit on my own with no success. I used to turn to my desires instead of Allah when I felt bad feelings. I am now more in tune with my emotions and don't want to meet Allah with this sin. I hope that this community can help me stay chaste.

Salamualaikum,

I will make a post on this later but I’m curious to hear from those who are married.

Has being married made it significantly easier to stay away from porn?

Alhamdulillah, I was able to stay clean today. Hope to talk to you guys tomorrow inshallah.

At times, we get angry over Allah after committing sins. We regret for what we have done and sometimes complain why Allah did not send me help? why he did not protect me? he could have stopped me. Why did he let me slip? Sometimes, we slip even deeper and start taking the mercy of Allah for granted and think Allah just made me sin. He will forgive me and we fall into a trap of repeating the sins continuing to take Allah's mercy for granted.

There is no need to be angry over Allah. Because,

Whatever affliction befalls you is because of what your own hands have committed. And He pardons much.
Ash-Shuraa 42:30

And after we repent, Allah forgives us.

When those who believe in Our signs come to you, say, “Peace be on you! Your Lord has prescribed for Himself Mercy. Surely, in case you did evil in ignorance, then after you repent, and amend(your conduct), then truly He is Often Forgiving, Most Merciful.
Al-An'am 06:54

And remember we have been given free will. That does not mean we are completely free. Remember times when Allah did save us from disasters. It is the Shaytaan behind playing tricks.

So I’ve struggled with pleasuring myself for years. Alhamdulillah I wouldn’t say I have a porn addiction at all but sometimes I do require some stimulus and will read/ look at something.

Can you scare me away from deepening this habit before it gets bad and I do get a dependence on porn while doing it.

Stop using Wilpower and Filters to stay sober….. Do this instead🥺🥺

One day my son couldn’t sleep 🛌 He was 8. I asked him WhatsApp son???

He said “ Dad I’ve got problems”. I was thinking what problems has an eight year old got.

I said “tell me about it son”. I didn’t know what I was in for. He started rattling off his problems. Half of them where things out of his control. In fact 95% he couldn’t do a thing about.

I had to stop 🛑 him he was blurting out constant streams of problems.

I said “ Hold on Son here is a pen 🖊 write it down for me”.

I watched him sit there and write 34 problems by hand 34!!!!!

We started combing through the top three after we did that. He smiled and was able to go to sleep. I could see he was physically lighter. Happier.

There was my 8 year old son streaming with Anxiety, stress and panic. All I did with him was start removing the roots of the issues.

Once you remove the roots of your ADDICTION

You can go to sleep

Have you removed the roots of your addiction or have you been holding onto issues for decades

Signs you haven’t removed the root 🔥 1. Urges just come out of nowhere 🔥 2. You have a short fuse and can snap on anyone 🔥 3. You just switch addictions from one to another 🔥 4. You’ve never worked with anyone to remove the root.

Signs you’ve removed the roots. 🐉 1. You get next to zero urges on a daily basis 🐉 2. You don’t jump between addictions.

Need further help?!?!

1. Book a session gor a free discovery of the roots your addiction.
2. ⁠Look out for the podcast released this week

Prophet Muhammad ﷺ said: “Verily, you will never leave anything for the sake of Allah Almighty, but that Allah will replace it with something better for you.” [Musnad Ahmad 23074 | Graded Sahih by Al-Arna'ut] This is a promise from Allah that continues until the end of time.

take this how you want but it’s a scientific fact that conception rates peak in november/december.

To people that are struggling during this time know that this can be a challenging part of the year to get through biologically speaking.

stay strong and don’t be discouraged!

i have done it again after about 2 months. for the past 2 months i have lock my phone away and its working but after 2 months i got my phone its started again. I started to feel horny and all that kind of stuff i endure it around 2 weeks before i gave in.

I dont know what to do anymore i cant lock my phone away for the entire year i have work to do. Is there any dua that i can do to help me or any tips. Please help me

I have indeed fapped. Idk what to do.

1. I do prayers

2. I do repentance

3. I take Wudu dearly

4. I read Books and Quran

5. I used to listen to lectures

I do ALL This, yet NOTHING. I also keep myself busy. Please help. I hate this, I don't want to fall into this anymore, please. I'm, sadly, mostly alone in my day so these thoughts just break in, what do I do???

Assalamualaikum warahmatullahi wabarakathuhu.

Stop wherever you are. Stop falling more and more deep. The result is only sorry, grief and regret. How many times, did we fall into the same sin? relapse, regret, repeat! Did we unlock something new? No! It is the same thing every time, no matter how many times we do or what new ways we do it. No surprise and the end is sorrow and regret.

Listen to what Allah says in the Quran Sura Al-Baqara Verse no 208.

O you who believe! Enter into Islam whole-heartedly; And follow not the footsteps of the Satan; For he is to you an avowed*(stated(publicly) or admitted)* enemy.

1. Stop whatever you are doing now
2. Shutdown your phone
3. Go take a cold shower.
4. Do Thawba! and go out somewhere you like. How about a coffee? meanwhile listen to a motivational Islamic video while sipping a hot coffee to get you back on track.
5. Come back to clean your environment.
   1. Clean your room first
   2. Clean your phone or any device you used to sin.
6. Get back to work, study, be disciplined.
7. Create a productive routine and start doing it right away.
8. Workout - do cardio sessions for at least 20 mins.

Here is a quick 20 mins starter workout to get you active.

jumping jacks - 15
burpees - 15
box jumps - 15
high knees - 30
plank - 45 secs
skipping - 100
jumping jacks - 15
stretch

Remember: Beginning is always hard! As you get going, things become easy.

A family friend showed me inappropriate videos and would talk to me suggestively at a very young age. When I would see them a few years later, they would show me pornographic videos and we would watch it together. I would've never been hypersexual if that never occurred and I hate myself for that fact that it still affects me to this day. I've never been in a romantic relationship and marriage is certainly not an option for me. no matter how many times I try to stop myself, I will always relapse. I pray to Allah but I still fall into the same cycle of repeating the same sins. Will I ever change? I'm not as religious as I used to be but I genuinely no one to talk to this about, and I am never going to bring this situation up with anyone I know. It is a big secret and I have never told any family members about what I was made to watch. I thought to myself that since this a subreddit that has people who has been through similar situations as me, I can seek advice from this. Sorry for any grammatical errors english is not my first language.

Is there a true halal way to deal with hyper sexuality in Islam and if so what are they. Not asking from someone’s previous experience or preference. If anyone can quote some Quran or hadith I’d love to know !

Zina is a test of the soul, but remember that Allah has promised immense reward for those who restrain their desires for His sake.

He said, “Indeed, those who fear Allah when touched by an impulse from Shaytan, they remember [Him] and they see [clearly]” (Surah Al-A’raf 7:201).

Guard your heart, your eyes, and your soul. Every time you resist, you elevate your rank with Allah.

Cry to Him like Yaqub (AS), who said, “I only complain of my suffering and grief to Allah” (Surah Yusuf 12:86).

Allah will protect you and strengthen you Just like he did to prophet musa “You have been granted your request, O Musa.”

Trust and believe ! I have no doubt he will help me and you guys too my brothers and sisters !!!

Title. When you relapse, you had to have taken steps towards it.

You are in control of your hands when you search for haram on your phone. You are in control of your hands when you lock your doors and take your clothes off. You are in control when you persist on a haram fantasy and keep thinking about it. You are in control of your hands when you put them on places they shouldn’t be. You are in control of your eyes when you do not lower your gaze.

Don’t blame your hormones or stress or circumstances. Trust me, we all have those problems. Those excuses you bring up did not directly cause you to relapse, YOU caused your own relapse. Even the whispers of shaytan do not cause you to sin unless YOU give into them. So resist them and seek refuge in Allah.

Your life is slipping away and the Day of Judgement is getting closer and closer; there is no time for excuses or procrastination. Would you rather endure the pain of resisting your temptations or the pain of jahannam? Take accountability and be disciplined.

May Allah help us all.

#Read this before you quit

Assalamu Alaikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh.
To my dear brothers and sisters who feel like giving up, this message is for you. If you're drowning in guilt, overwhelmed by your struggles, or feel distant from Allah, please listen closely. You are not alone, and Allah has not abandoned you.

Section 1: Addressing the Pain
Life can feel unbearable sometimes. You may think, "Why am I even trying if I keep failing?" or "How can Allah forgive me when I’ve sinned so much?" These thoughts can weigh heavy on your heart, but know this: Allah is closer to you than you realize.

Allah says in Surah Al-Baqarah:

"Allah does not burden a soul beyond that it can bear." (Qur'an 2:286)

Whatever you're going through, Allah knows you can endure it. The struggle you face is a sign of your potential, not your weakness.

Section 2: The Hope in Allah’s Mercy
Shaytan wants you to despair because hopelessness keeps you from turning back to Allah. But Allah, in His infinite mercy, calls us back to Him over and over again.

In Surah Az-Zumar, Allah says:

"Say, O My servants who have transgressed against themselves [through sin], do not despair of the mercy of Allah. Indeed, Allah forgives all sins. Indeed, it is He who is the Forgiving, the Merciful." (Qur'an 39:53)

No matter how many times you've fallen, Allah’s mercy is greater than your mistakes. It’s not about never falling; it’s about always returning to Him.

Section 3: A Reminder of Allah’s Love
Sometimes, you may feel unworthy of Allah’s love, but that’s a lie. Allah’s love is not conditional on your perfection—it’s constant even when you fall short.

In Surah Ad-Duha, Allah reassures the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) during a time when he felt isolated:

"Your Lord has not abandoned you, nor has He detested [you]." (Qur'an 93:3)

This verse is for you too. Allah has not abandoned you, even if you feel lost.

Section 4: Turning Struggles Into Strength
Your struggles are not pointless. They are a means of purification and growth. Every hardship you endure with patience draws you closer to Allah.

In Surah Ash-Sharh, Allah says:

"For indeed, with hardship [will be] ease. Indeed, with hardship [will be] ease." (Qur'an 94:6-7)

Notice that Allah repeats this promise—ease will always accompany hardship. Your pain is temporary, but the reward for enduring it is eternal.

Section 5: Practical Steps to Keep Going
Here are three steps to help you move forward when you feel like giving up:

1. Renew Your Tawbah: No matter how many times you’ve sinned, keep asking Allah for forgiveness. Tawbah is your shield against despair.
2. Surround Yourself With Positivity: Connect with people who remind you of Allah and encourage you to stay strong in your faith.
3. Turn to the Qur’an: The Qur’an is your source of healing and guidance. Even reading a single verse can reignite hope in your heart.

My dear brother, my dear sister, don’t give up. Your journey is not defined by your falls but by your willingness to rise again. Allah loves you more than you can imagine, and He is waiting for you to turn to Him.

Let me leave you with this beautiful verse from Surah Al-Inshirah:

"So when you have finished [your duties], then stand up [for worship]. And to your Lord direct [your] longing." (Qur'an 94:7-8)

Keep striving, keep turning to Allah, and never let despair win. You are stronger than you think, and Allah’s mercy is closer than you feel.

Wa Assalamu Alaikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh.

Links:

Tiktok

YouTube

Salamualaikum,

With whatever success we have (with NoFap or otherwise) its always because of the blessings of Allah. We do what we can in terms of staying disciplined and incorporating all the tips and tricks in the world but there is always going go be holes in our system. There is always going to be situations we are not prepared for.

Put your faith in Allah. Even after all the restrictions and self control, we are helpless without him. May Allah grant us success and ease inshallah. Ameen.

As usual. I’m taking things one day at a time. See you guys tomorrow inshallah.

Asalamu alaykum wa rahmatulllahi wa barakatuh,

As part of my ongoing struggle to improve myself I came across this hadith today which I thought I would share:

*Aisha reported: The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, said, “Verily, Allah is gentle and He loves gentleness in all matters.”

Source: Ṣaḥīḥ al-Bukhārī 6927, Ṣaḥīḥ Muslim 2165

Grade: Muttafaqun Alayhi (authenticity agreed upon) according to Al-Bukhari and Muslim*

insha'Allah you find it beneficial

Here are the links:

Tiktok

YouTube

Instagram

Salamualaikum,

I’m getting to the point now where I’m getting a little cocky with my phone. I caught myself clicking on an article I did not need to and was able to get out of there alhamdulillah.

At times this feels like such a delicate affair. One click too far and you’re too deep in trouble. Inshallah I need to be more watchful. Allah saved me today. May he keep up strong and on the right path. Ameen.

As usual, I’m taking things one day at a time. See you guys tomorrow inshallah.

Im so much in pain and shame.

I am over 30 and I have this porn addiction since very early age. I wasnt religiously aware till my 20s. I didnot commit zina as I knew then this was big thing but I had a girl friend. And we were planning to marry and we were very close and fell into some sort of closeness physically and on video calls for about a year or so.

I broke up with her due to disagreements in my 20s and become more religious made tawbah but my porn addiction continued. That break up destroyed me as I was shy, introvert and not so close to girls except my girlfriend. She was everything to me then. And I had only a couple close friend. I am still not social and do not have any friend as of now. And I do not have mu familly with me too. Parents divorced.

Later I decided to quit porn and get married properly. I was somewhat achieving that with some relapses (dont remember the frequency now as it was mid 20s)

Then I got married to a narcissistic woman who looked highly religious and respectful and loving in the beginning. My marriage was a waste and it was horrible. She rejected me many times. I didnot see love there as well as in my family from my dad. He doesnt talk to me for years. My mom is the only loving person in my life. I am in so much shame.

I wanted to suicide sometimes. Before my marriage and after divorce. Now I donot want that but I sometimes think maybe its better to die to not commit more sins. Even writing that makes me devastated.

My religious activities went down after my divorce and got back to porn even deeper.

Recently I made tawbah and quit porn 2 months straight but I was relapsing on masturbating every a few days. Couldn't improve that. I still want to get married. But there seem no hope in my search.

I now have a mental break down after one talk with a candidate I liked recently. She did not want to continue so suddenly.

And what I did after that is not just porn. I also started looking for text partner and even tried some video calling too for pleasure but it was unsuccessful. I am afraid I will go deeper and start committing zina and eve more. I feel like I cant hold it. Im not strong.

I am normal, successful in my career, highly educated, logical and practicing muslim but this sins are just putting me deep down in the earth. I cant get it off of my chest. It burns like hell and I cant talk anyone even to my terapist.

This is first time I write all together. May Allah forgive me. I recognize Allah I donot culturally believe in Islam but I research that deeply too. I read always. And try to analyze how Allah created things. My view is open on that and that deepens my shame bcs he sees me. I hope wrinting here anonymously won't be counted as revealing my sins. O Allah forgive me.

I am in shame evreytime I am praying. I feel like I will be punished in this life and after forever. I cant find a wife and friend. I will continue for tawbah but I am lost.

i was addicted to porn and I left it 2-3 years ago. But i still have side effects from the addiction. should I be transparent about these issues and their origin along with my struggle to overcome porn addiction to the one I marrying before marrying because in one way or another it is gonna effect our future and it feels like a betrayal to the one I am marrying. I Love this person a lot and don’t wanna loose her and at the same time I can not betray her. Do I need to come clean or should I hide my sins as instructed in Islam. Kindly give genuine advice (people who are married and suffered from this disease) Thank you.

I am muslimah and struggling from this issue for the longest time i can remember and i think i got into this addiction due to my mental health and ocd issues. I dont know how to quit it tbh i can go on long streaks but i eventually relapse its awfully frustrating please any tips would be appreciated jazakallahu khair