I'm about to go through a Arbitration with Wells Fargo and a neutral third party for identity theft. People who went through it already, not about to or thinking about it or filling out the paperwork, how did it go? Can you give any advice? And how much did you ask for vs. what you got? Any advice is helpful.

Greetings everyone!

I need input from Mediators who work in the field as a career, what did you do to break into the industry and what was your educational background and or experience?

• So a little bit of background, I graduate this Summer with a Bachelor’s Degree in Communications Studies

• I have already been certified in the state of California to mediate

• I have completed both basic and advanced trainings for meditation

• And I have been volunteering since January for a nonprofit meditation program for the courts

Now how do I get paid to do this for a living? As much as I love the volunteer work and meditating Civil cases for the courts, I wish to now be paid for it when I graduate this Summer

My wife and I are going through mediation. We’re trying to be fair and amicable with each other and split debts and asset 50-50. My wife has proposed a 70–30% split on the primary residence of the children. I would take 70% ownership.

In Pennsylvania, what would be her responsibilities in helping with the mortgage taxes and bills? The children would remain in this household, and I would be the primary caretaker- granting her time with the children whenever she wishes.

Hi guys, I want to become a mediator in civil litigation. Do I need a degree? I am currently studying for a paralegal diploma and we are at the introduction of mediation. I really enjoy it. I was wondering if I can apply to become a meditator?

Hello community,

I'm working in schools with young adults as a mediator and I look for a user-orientated evaluation tool for mediation.

Where can I find a scientifically proven instrument to evaluate what my clients feel/think before and after they go to mediation?

I don't just want to give them a random questionnaire but one that measures what changed (transformation) based on a scientific perspective.

Does anyone know where I might find such a questionnaire?

Thank you so much for your attention and participation.

Just wanted to provide my experience for those that are in the same boat due to the malpractice of opening up unwanted accounts with Wells Fargo.

I, like many others, received the initial letter with an offer of $78. I called the phone # in the letter and they upped it to an additional $250 which was I believe was the standard course of action from their side based on reading people's experiences. I then received a mediation form to fill out if I was unsatisfied with the offer which I did and listed $25,000 in the "Claim or Relief Sought" field.

1 month later I received a call with an update saying they received my form and that I would be contacted soon. 2 months later (yesterday) I received a call from someone who confirmed he saw the $25,000 claim but that they would not be able to come close to that and offered $700. I said no and he asked what would be a number that would make you satisfied and I said I would be happy with $3,000. He said unfortunately he could not and said he could only offer $1,000 more (total $1,700) and asked if I would like to accept. If not he said I would be then go into official mediation that would be a "2 hour" conversation/process.

I don't know if he was exagerrating but I caved and accepted the offer as I didn't want to commit that much time and considering my accounts were open for only 2 weeks. I felt my case would be quite weak compared to some folks who have had their unwanted accounts open for months/years so I thought that offer was decent. He then thanked me and said a check would be mailed out.

Looking back I'm sure if I went through the official mediation process I could have gotten more but oh well. If you were affected for several months to years I would strongly encourage you to fight for much more than I did and hopefully the dollar figure I shared sheds some light as to what range you could ask for. Anyway, just wanted to share my experiences. Best of luck!

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We’ve been married 30 years, I am currently disabled with Parkinson’s disease. I am able to function, just at a slow pace.

She has hurled her last insult at me (don’t you do anything all day?). This was after I installed a washer and dryer in our garage, but I didn’t take out the trash.

I want out. I am a minimalist, she is a hoarder. 99% of the crap in the house is hers and she can have it I don’t care. I currently collect Social Security disability. There is very little retirement between the two of us. My brother has graciously offered a place for me to stay.

We have a house that has about $200,000 in equity, and together we have about $50,000 in debt. Kids are grown and out of the house.

Does this sound like a cut and dry case for mediation? I really don’t want to get lawyers involved to drag anything out, I just need to get away from her before my head explodes.

Hello friends, if I could please get some advice I would be incredibly grateful. I’m having a call with Wells Fargo to have a mediation because I was one of the many people who received a letter notifying them that their account was unauthorizedly charged monthly for a service they were illegally signed up for. They then gave my information to a third-party again with no consent. Lots of laws: broken breach of privacy, security, mishandling, negligence, theft etc. They tried to give me a settlement but I said it wasn’t enough and decided I wanted to move forward with mediation. they never signed up for. I’m representing myself is there any advice I can have on how to negotiate a higher number?? Thank you all so much!!

Trying to figure this all out. My ex and I have 1 son together, we both were in the military and now live in different States. The divorce decree was filed in Kansas, but neither of us live there. She has our child living with her, I left the military because I felt both parents in the military deploying would cause troubles. She doesn't want him to come live with me, but I'm currently the one not looking to get deployed or go anywhere. We were ordered to go to mediation when I left the service to work out the child custody agreement. I don't want full custody, and when I lived in the same state as her, we did 50/50. I know with her being in another state as me, 50/50 isn't feasible, but she has the option to move here, where I'd agree to do 50/50 again.

So I guess what I'm wondering is what will mediation do for us? I know they're not there to make decisions for us, but I feel like it's just going to be dragged out. What happens if she's not willing to let him come stay with me, if neither of us can come to an agreement?

My friend K was in an extremely abusive relationship and got out of it last year. H, her ex, would SA her, psychologically and emotionally abuse her and he never stopped he just left when he wanted to go around having sex with more people. He went on, after their relationship, to abuse another friend of mine and several other people, mostly women and a few nonbinary folk, all while lying about his gender orientation. I know he lied because he would be asked by male friends if he really felt that way and he’d respond with “of course not it’s just easier to get close to them when I say this”

So H has been banned from several community spaces in our circle, more and more people are avoiding him or actively telling him to go away, and he’s been relegated to one woman who for some reason believes him over everyone else and refuses to abandon him and his shitty behavior.

Now, H has contacted a mediation group in our city and had them contact K. They’re saying he wants to talk about the allegations she’s made against him. K, obviously, thinks they should f off and leave her alone.

I want to know, as mediators, is this an appropriate situation? I’m sure H lied about the situation to make himself seem pitiful and victimized, but I would think mediation between a r@pist and his victim would be a no go without some kind of court involvement?

edit: please note that K isn’t going to the police for any of this. Our community is simply rejecting H based on his behaviors because multiple victims have spoken up and not just K. She’d rather he just leave her alone forever.

Been married 19 years. We haven't had sex in 5. Today as I was bringing in groceries he let me know he met someone else and had sex while I was away. Yes, I'm angry but I can't blame him. We don't have sex because I just have zero feelings that way for him. However, I'm still really angry!! Just divorce me before finding someone new. I don't want to spend $ on a lawyer but no sure if mediation will work

I'm asking this because I am considering becoming a mediator (ideally for couples who want to stay married) but I don't want to risk accidentally brainwashing myself with the thoughts I repeatedly see voiced by my clients. Any words of warning or encouragement are welcome.

Is it possible to get into the mediation field without a degree?

I’ve heard of both in person and online certification programs as well, and I was wondering what are they like?

My mom has a lawsuit where she is fighting for her sister who suffered injuries in a NY nursing home where she later died. She has two cases totaling 8 million dollars. The case just went to mediation. She thinks they will settle for 20% but I keep telling her don’t count your chickens before they hatch. Any ideas how much they will settle for?

I recently participated in a JAMS mediation for a business dispute. Mediator was Morton Denlow based in IL, billing $1500/hr plus attorneys costs on both sides. All in all about $25k was spent by each party for the preparation of mediation statements, session time, etc.

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I would have expected there to be some sort of evaluative assessment to help the parties reach a resolution since the former judge was regarded as many to be the strongest mediator in the area.

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Low and behold, he bills 14 hours (including for his lunch break in his own home [zoom was used]), for basically just shuttling back and forth between 2 zoom rooms and asking if the other party is ready to settle yet.

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He also has a list of 7 reasons that he walks both parties through on why you should not sue each other.

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That's it! Poof, bye bye $25k. And they are still billing me for extra "services rendered" despite the lack of resolution due to the Judge failing to provide an evaluative opinion to facilitate a resolution.

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After going through this process, I can offer no better than an absolutely terrible recommendation (0/10) for JAMS mediation services if both sides think they have a legitimate case.

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If you find yourself reading this in a dispute, wanting to mediate, I would take this option off the table and run the other way. It could be possibly productive to do a binding arbitration (these are around $80-100k), or just sue ($100-200k+).

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The only way a mediation will work is both parties are actually willing to acknowledge the weaknesses in their case. Which in the event of many high tension business disputes, frankly just isn't going to happen.

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JAMS is really giving people false hope thinking that they will be hammering both sides to create a resolution. That's simply not what's happening. Save your money and stay away from this borderline criminal misrepresentation of a service provider.

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If your lawyers can't find a resolution between them, sue. Or don't.

I wanted to share with you that my new book about conflict engagement and resolution, Why Do We Keep Arguing? (And How To Stop), has now been published and is available on Amazon first at:

UK: https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B0CY8P96NX

US: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0CY8Z9GT8

If you get the chance to read it, I would love to hear what you think, and please feel free to share it with those in your networks you think might be interested and perhaps in need of another helpful resource. Thanks so much in advance.

Best,

Scott

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I am not going to lie. That I have been going through a lot with my wife and my family. On both side been hurt from each other and rightfully so. I know it coming from a deeper issue. Even with my self. Everything I try just gets slapped in my face. Is there a place or someone I can look up and sit us down. And figure it all out.

Hello All,

I have a mediation scheduled with State Farm insurance company. They are my former landlords insurance company. Does anyone have any insight into what I can expect from them.

Hello my friends! Wells Fargo was involved in a huge scandal in which they stole money from their unassuming customers & in my case added unauthorized monthly products to my account, gave my infor to a third party, & unlawful surprise overdraft fees. I have 3 people listed on my account so they did this for every person listed (sooo sneaky!) I received 3 remediation letters. I officially have a 2 hour meditation on March 20th. If unsatisfied after call, mediator will send over a proposal. I’ll present my case as to what and why I’m certain amount. They offered 5100 in pre mediation. I rejected that, I’m going for 10-15k, a lawyer said he’d get that, but take half. I back myself and the incredible online community of people tired of corporate corruption and greed. Wells Fargo has $2 billion to pay out, all residual funds get given (escheated) to the state! To the bloody govt! Maybe 10% of customers will enter remediation as most had no idea they could! So please help me use fancy lingo and strategy to get the most I can bc f the govt getting money owed to us!

My grievances: breach of confidentiality, breach of privacy, breach of security, customer of 16 years loyalty, theft, violated banking regulations consumer protection laws, financial modernization services act, and lastly fraud. Thank you all so much in advance 🫶🏽☀️

I asked my child’s father to go to mediation with me over our 1 year old. After that i got in the mail i had been served and if i did not go to mediation then it would be contempt to court. well obviously i went because i had suggested it originally and we came up with agreements. Well now he is COMPLETELY disregarding what we agreed on. For example tonight my son went to the hospital and it’s mandatory to tell the other parent as soon as you can, well he didn’t… for three hours. Eventually i got a notification through my insurance app it had been used at the emergency room for my son so i called/texted his father. Completely ignored. Called the hospital which told him to call me, then he calls immediately. He has broken other rules but to me this is a major rule that’s broken. Does this make the mediation agreement invalid? Once i get my son back i honestly do not want to give him back on his father’s day. I just need some answers.

I’m unsure whether a mediator is helpful in my situation. Here’s the situation:

I have no custody papers drawn up. We have been separated since 2020 and have our 5 year doing 50/50.

In 2021 child’s dad (my ex) decided to move away (45 min) but stated nothing would change as far as schooling goes. His dad moved away to accommodate his new gf and her family etc.

We have been continuing 50/50 but now things get tricky because our son is starting school. The dad is wanting us to move out close to them so it’s easier for their family but it doesn’t work for ours. I really want to avoid serving him papers and hoping mediation can help.

If anyone has advice, I would appreciate that!

I need advice. I am about to request meditation regarding child consent orders.

Background is; Separated for over 2 years. Children currently 50/50.

Issues include;

1. Nil financial support for health insurance, extracurricular activities, schooling needs etc
2. Nil communication from ex. My messages regarding the children are constantly ignored. [This communication is only specifically surrounding the children's needs eg. Medications, sporting arrangements etc].

My question. If we do get written consent orders outling expectations in order to co-parent effectively, what happens if he chooses to just ignore these? Am I just wasting my time and money?

Any advice will be greatly appreciated.

Hello, Our family went through a very traumatic event on Christmas 2022. Our dog bit my husband’s brother’s child (my nephew). It was very traumatic for everyone, especially their family. Our nephew was given stitches (on the face) and there will be scarring. The dog, who had never shown aggression, was ultimately diagnosed with a brain tumour and put down.

The problem is, no matter how much we apologise they are unable to forgive us for letting this happen. They keep going into hypotheticals about how he could have been killed, how he can sue us once he turns 18, and most recently how it ‘wasn’t an accident’. We take 100% of the blame, have sent them thousands of dollars to cover all costs and any future costs, but they just keep coming up with new reasons that we are terrible people who tried to hurt their son.

We had a perfectly fine relationship before this incident. At this point I dont know how to move forward without professional help, but I’m struggling to determine which kind of professional I need. I would like someone to talk to all of us as a group (all the adults). We are based in NC and my brother in law and his family live in Berlin. My questions are:

• Is this appropriate for mediation?
• How do I find a mediator? Everything I see is discussing couples.
• How do I find a mediator able to practice with some of the participants living abroad (or does that matter?)

I would really appreciate any insight.

first time poster.
Just wondering if anyone out there knows anything about conducting mediation with a bank that knowingly performed deceptive business practices. They are asking us “what can we do to make this right.” I don’t know what or how to respond.

Family mediation

I (F23) got married to a military member and have a son from a previous relationship with (M25). I’ll be moving from Florida to North carolina sometime this year but before I can I need to sort out the legal/ sole custody of my son. I want to go to mediation that way my ex and I can talk about the terms and conditions for the custody of our son; however, he just wants us to write our own terms and get it notarized and we each have a copy. He says it’s cheaper and easier that way. Only problem is I don’t trust him and a mediator can do just that, yes it’ll cost more money since its a lawyer and what not. I guess what i’m asking is if we agree to our own terms and get it notarized can he use it against me one day down the road?? Like if we had to go to court later will the court see it as legal?? We are both trying to avoid court (to pricey and just too long) so mediation was the next best step.