1. Recommend me a television show with dark humour and substance abuse themes (I suggested similar to hazbin hotel, black books, and bojack horsemen)

2.) weigh in on my deep interpersonal morale debate

3.) How to bake a cookie in a microwave

Scene: Inside Westminster Abbey, dramatically lit with torches and adorned with banners depicting scenes from Arthurian legend. The air is filled with a sense of anticipation and the faint, reverent murmur of those gathered. The King's Guard, clad in armor as the Knights of the Round Table, are humorously attempting to balance their modern ceremonial hats atop their helmets.

Fanfare sounds as Prince William, clad in a regal, Arthurian-era cloak, steps forward. He approaches the Archbishop of Canterbury, who stands ready with a beautifully crafted, symbolic crown and the legendary Excalibur, resting on a cushion of royal velvet.

Archbishop of Canterbury: "We gather in the hallowed halls of history, on the cusp of a new era. Before us stands a prince, ready to embrace destiny not as a monarch of old, but as a symbol of unity and change. William, do you accept this charge, to lead us from the past into the dawn of a new republic?"

Prince William/Arthur: "With a heart both heavy and hopeful, I accept. Not as a ruler over subjects, but as a fellow citizen committed to forging a path forward, together."

The Archbishop gently places the symbolic crown upon William's head, not as a monarch, but as the last in a line that stretches back through the mists of time. He then hands William the sword Excalibur, its blade gleaming in the torchlight.

Archbishop of Canterbury: "May this sword, symbol of power and protection, serve as a reminder of our shared duty to safeguard the realm's future. Let it be a beacon of justice, guiding us toward a community where every voice is heard, and every person valued."

William raises Excalibur high, the assembly erupting into applause, not for the power it represents, but for the unity and collective purpose it symbolizes.

Prince William/Arthur: "In times of yore, legends spoke of a king and his knights, upholding justice across the land. Today, as we stand at the cusp of change, I, as your Arthur, bid thee farewell to an era. The monarchy, like Excalibur, was a symbol of unity and strength but must now return to the lake from whence it came, as we embrace a new chapter written by you, the people of this great land."

The crowd listens, a mixture of amusement and solemn reflection on their faces.

Prime Minister Rishi Sunak: "Ladies and gentlemen, Britons of all counties! The path to this day has been paved with debate, humor, and a quintessentially British resolve to question and evolve. As we introduce our new constitution, let us remember that change is the only constant, and today, we celebrate our ability to adapt and thrive."

He presents a scroll, humorously large and unwieldy, symbolizing the new British constitution.

Lord Reed of Alumir: "With the power vested in me, and before the eyes of history and the Loch Ness Monster, I hereby declare the monarchy dissolved, in accordance with Article 1 of our new constitution. May the spirit of fair play, queuing, and tea guide our Republic."

The crowd chuckles and applauds, a sense of unity in the shared moment of history and humor.

Prince William/Arthur kneels before MP Liz Truss, dressed extravagantly as the Lady of the Lake.

Prince William/Arthur: "Alas, the crown has grown heavy, not with jewels but with the weight of time and change. Take this sword, symbol of a bygone era, and let us stride boldly into a future of our own making."

MP Truss, with an air of dignity that barely conceals a smirk, takes Excalibur.

MP Truss: "With this act, we consign myths to the mist and legends to the lake. Britain, behold your new dawn!"

She exits, a Harrier Jump Jet labeled "BAF", formed from "RAF" with a stroke of spray paint completing the "B", awaiting. She is harnessed to it, holding Excalibur high. The jet takes off, escorted by a pair of F-35Bs. MP Truss retains her composure and poise as she hangs from the Harrier and the planes accelerate to 200 miles per hour, leaving trails of red, white, and navy blue. After two hours of flight, the planes reach Loch Ness, and the Harrier drops her off nearby the misty lake.

Holding Excalibur, Truss dramatically wades into the water and vanishes, leaving behind ripples and a sense of wonder.

After a suspenseful moment, the Loch Ness monster briefly emerges, letting out a burp that echoes the end of an era, before tranquilly returning to the depths.

The crowd, now outside, watches in a mixture of disbelief and laughter, the event capturing the heart of British humor and solemnity intertwined.

Narrator (voiceover as the scene fades): "And so, the curtain falls on the British monarchy, not with a battle but with a burp, marking the beginning of a new era. May the stories we tell and the legends we craft continue to inspire, amuse, and unite us."

The scene fades out, leaving viewers with a sense of closure, a smile, and perhaps a tear for the end of an era and the beginning of something wholly new and yet unmistakably British.