/r/daddit

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This is a subreddit for Dads. Single Dads, new Dads, Step-Dads, tall Dads, short Dads, and any other kind of Dad. If you've got kids in your life that you love and provide for, come join us as we discuss everything from birth announcements to code browns in the shower.

 

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  1. When participating, please follow Reddiquette.

  2. Keep all content Safe for Work. Otherwise, flag borderline posts NSFW.

  3. Don't feed the trolls.

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  7. No nudity (defined as "below the belt") will be tolerated. Even if the photo is innocent and non-suggestive, we have a zero-tolerance policy for nudity.

  8. Talk of violence will not be permitted in any form. Suggesting violence, even in a joking manner, will result in a ban. We have a zero tolerance policy when it comes to violence.

  9. First and foremost, this is a sub for dads helping dads. Any post or comments which runs counter to this ideal will be subject to removal and bans as deemed necessary.


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/r/daddit

1,252,088 Subscribers

5

Dadda, can you draw me riding a motorbike made of sushi? - 3yr old daughter

My daughter has taken an interest in drawing and painting, which I happen to love, she has started asking me for crazy drawings, and I'm trying to do my best to nuture her imagination, hoping to make a book for her when I find the time!

0 Comments
2024/06/13
06:01 UTC

3

Almost 3yr old son scolded mum and it was hilarious (to me at least)

Back story: A couple of weeks ago I was driving our son to daycare and the driver of the car in front was playing around on their phone, not paying attention to anything around them. Honked and yelled at the windscreen for them to put their phone down. Then I hear the parrot in the back set say ‘yeah, put your phone down’. I replied ‘That’s right. And if you ever see mummy using her phone in the car you need to tell her to stop and put it down because it’s dangerous”.

I think you can see where this is going. I’ve been out of town for work the past couple of days so my wife has been doing the daycare run. Apparently the conversation went like this

[mum playing with her phone] S: mummy, put your phone down M: ok, in a second S: Nooooo. I really need you to put your phone down M: yes yes I will S: I will tell daddy when he comes back and he will send you to naughty corner

Suffice to say I wish I was there to give the little champ a high five. I was in tears laughing when she told me. She didn’t find it as funny

And yes on a serious note, mummy is going to the naughty corner when I get home. It’s one of my biggest peeves.

0 Comments
2024/06/13
05:52 UTC

4

Asking other dads on here, is it excusable for a dad to threaten to hit their child under stress?

Just to clarify I’m not a child but I live with and help support my parents, I’m 23f. My dad’s never hit me but when he gets stressed in an angry tone he says things like “I want to punch you in the face” “I’m going to hit you with this” (referring to a metal tv mount recently), when he threatens to hit me with stuff he acts like he’s going to and moves it but stops himself, sometimes when he threatens to punch me he raises a fist to me, recently he swerved into the other lane while driving and acted like we were going to crash into a tree and started banging on the steering wheel yelling he wanted to kill us because we didn’t have time to get his vape before a doctors appointment, another time as a teen I opened up to him about my mental health and he destroyed my room & threw a table by me (not towards me) into my wall. There has been an insane amount of stress on him & all of my family the past 4 years, he wasn’t like this when I was a kid but since I was 19 he started being around more & that’s when this started. My mom says it’s mental health struggle and to ignore it and don’t make it into a big deal, she says this isn’t uncommon for dads with extreme stress on them but I’m worried and it’s very upsetting to me. I don’t feel safe but I know he would never hurt me. Sorry if this isn’t the right forum

9 Comments
2024/06/13
05:19 UTC

4

Feeling of dreadfulness seeing my kid grow up

How do you deal with the feeling that your kid will go out there and find out that the world isnt actually warm and fuzzy like it is at home.

I have a 5 yo. He is the very sweet and has a very high eq. He struggles with changes though. He will be going to kindergarten this year.

Im still lost for words on what im trying to say. I guess i just wanna know how do you get yourself ready and your kids for what is out there when all they know is being loved and kindness?

2 Comments
2024/06/13
04:11 UTC

1

Poop after swaddling

Hey there! New dad with a newborn (5d) here. So far everything is fine, except for this one annoying thing: the LO is pooping only a little bit with his diapers on at first. And when we change them and prepare everything to feeding afterwards, THEN the great poop begins in his new diapers and we have to change again. Just waiting doesn't help. Maybe it's the relaxation after the exciting first diaper change? My question is: what can I do to animate him to poop that amount already in the first diaper? Certain positions, behaviors or anything? Or is it just live and we have to buy double as much diapers as thought? Does it get better with the coming weeks and months? Thank you all!

1 Comment
2024/06/13
03:58 UTC

17

Dad treat!

Wife is out of town with toddler son, infant daughter is asleep, had a rough day at work and needed to treat myself. A thick ribeye, mashed potatoes creamed spinach, a nice bourbon, cheap but decent wine, some chill tunes. How'd I do?

2 Comments
2024/06/13
03:14 UTC

39

I'm not entirely sure how to phrase this question, but I'd like to pick the brains of dads with multiple kids.

My wife is likely being induced Friday. Tonight I started to feel a little melancholy about how Thursday will be the last day that our (almost 3yo) son will be a the only kid in the house.

We're planning to send him to daycare, but I'm starting to feel like maybe I really ought to seize the limited time he'll have left and make it a really special day for him. Go out for pancakes, that kind of thing.

I guess my question is this: did your relationship with your first kid change when #2 arrived on the scene? Or, maybe more succinctly, if you could go back in time and take a day off work to have one last full-on play day with your first kid as an only child, would you?

28 Comments
2024/06/13
02:47 UTC

7

Well dads, I’ve finally done it.

All that is left from the kids’ Halloween candy bag is York peppermint patties, which means we are officially out of Halloween candy in this house. Proud I made it this long, sad I have more sneaky snacks left.

2 Comments
2024/06/13
02:45 UTC

5

Medieval Times - What Say Ye?

Kiddo is interested in going. I know Im not going for the food quality and I'm sure its overpriced. But did your kids love it? Was it worth it for them?

16 Comments
2024/06/13
02:43 UTC

9

Baby won't stop peeing in the potty

My 2 year old has been going through potty training. As part of it, we praised them whenever they peed in the potty. Now she has started to stagger her pee so that a little bit comes out at a time, which she then shows to everyone and insists on emptying into the toilet by herself. I then wash it and the process repeats. She can keep going for 90 minutes and throws a massive tantrum if any part of the process is interrupted. She refuses to do anything else for the entire time.Any ideas to get her to stop staggering her pees and just let it all out at once?

3 Comments
2024/06/13
02:36 UTC

265

PSA, keep heavy objects out of reach

My youngest pulled a heavy bowl off a shelf (while trying to get snacks) and it landed right on her toe. After some tears she's fine, but a good reminder to double check everything is out of reach because they keep getting taller every day

33 Comments
2024/06/13
02:19 UTC

2

Daughter Finally Wants to Sleep Alone

Ugh my 4.5yo told us out of nowhere at bedtime tonight that she wants to sleep alone. I was not ready for that at all.

She is usually with one of us at night and has always hated the idea of sleeping alone. Tonight she lasted about ten minutes and then came in asked if we had a night light because it was too dark and scary in her room. We told her we would get one for her tomorrow and she can try again. She was happy with that.

I'm so proud of her but damn that moving to the next stage of growing up always gets me.

6 Comments
2024/06/13
02:12 UTC

10

Artist's rendering of my kid and someone else's kid at their baseball game tonight. I love seeing my kids pay attention to what they're doing and do it well.

2 Comments
2024/06/13
02:09 UTC

3

Pulled my lower back, now looking after baby is super painful

This is purely a rant lol. I pulled my back 2 days ago not straightening my back and lifting up some boxes of tiles. I've pulled it before years ago, so this was reaggrevating it.

Holy wow, are things difficult. I do thr night shift, and just fed him after he woke up for his first feeding. If he wasn't crying, I think I would've given up. It was so painful I had to grit my teeth just to pick him up, and gritten my teeth again putting him down. The bending of thr back to lift him from thr crib is killing me lol.

Time to pop some Tylenol like they are candy lol. I really hope this heals in the next few days.

7 Comments
2024/06/13
02:07 UTC

3

The Father’s Day posts

Ok, I think we all know why we're here. What do you want for fathers' day? We want that weird sex thing that we always want, we want to go mow the lawn, we want to have a beer with the neighbour. The worst one I read was "to be left alone".

Great. What do you really want? For me, I want a chance to do one of those house projects we keep talking about. Put up the fence, build a pergola, paint the side of the house, install pot lights in the basement. Whatever it is I just want to get it done because there's never a good time and this is my day so let's do it! Am I alone? What projects do you have that you want to get done?

4 Comments
2024/06/13
02:07 UTC

51

How on earth do you approach death?

I realized just now as my kids are falling asleep, I have no idea what to tell them. they're 2 and 4, one of each. I was telling my oldest that she needs sleep to regain her energy and play tomorrow. I had mentioned how the sun was really hot today and probably sapped all her energy and that's why she's so tired. somehow we got off that train of thought, but came back around to it without me realizing what she was talking about. she blurted out "will I die?" and I was absolutely lost for words. My heart sank. I had no idea what to say. I asked her what she means and she clarified by saying "when I run out of energy" and I let out a big sigh. "no hunny, you just need to lay down and sleep. you'll have tons of energy tomorrow morning, like usual!" and that seemed to satisfy her.

but it made me realize, wow! I'm not prepared for this talk. How do you answer these questions?

58 Comments
2024/06/13
00:21 UTC

7

I need some help being a better husband.

Fellow dad’s, I may be about to lose my family.

My wife recently had an emotional infidelity and we are still reeling to try and recover. We have a 2yo daughter and what I thought was a marriage growing better with each passing season, but I was wrong.

She takes accountability for the affair, but as we e unpacked it, she’s unsure she wants to work on the marriage because of all the ways she’s felt unconsidered and unseen.

Here’s the rub, I struggle with autism and ADHD. In a nutshell, it means I’m bad at follow thru on tasks and I’m also really bad at picking up hints or subtleties.

For example, my wife has always been a strong woman and when we met it was very much “I don’t need protecting, I can handle myself.” We’re a progressive couple, so we fell into egalitarian roles and had a very equitable relationship.

Well turns out Jody made her feel protected and she realized that’s something she has actually wanted the entire time. With the autism, I take things at face value. If she would have asked for this I would have done it.

On top of that, my autism tends to make me cold, self centered, and very blunt. All qualities I want to improve.

But I struggle with where to start, and more importantly, where to start now since we’re currently on a six week trial for her to make a final decision on choosing us.

What have any of you done to get this right in the past?

20 Comments
2024/06/13
00:12 UTC

5

Streeeetch

Do your stretches my fellow dad's I've been stretching for what started as 5 min before bed to an hour now. I feel so much more limber in the morning it ain't much but helpful advice is advice

8 Comments
2024/06/13
00:10 UTC

49

Round 2

Baby #2 due tomorrow

8 Comments
2024/06/12
23:58 UTC

2

[Advice Request] Need advice about my sleep issues (8 month old only waking once a night at this point)

Hi Dads! Somewhere in the craziness of having our first baby, it seems that my body got used to having to wake up at night and still does even though I don't need to.

At the beginning I used to wake up and help my wife with diaper changes between feeds and help put our baby back down to sleep but for the last 4 months our baby sleeps from 6PM to 6AM in her own room and only wakes up once around 2 or 3 (sometimes twice a night but 1 is more common now) so my wife just handles the wake up (breastfeeding only so I can't do anything). She's a boss sleeper and just comes back and falls asleep no problem.

My issue is that I think my body has become chaotic with sleep because of the months of the crazy schedule and multiple night wake ups.

We go to bed around 9:30-10 most nights and 1 of 2 things happen. I either sleep 5-6 hours and wake up around 3 or 4AM, go pee and then can't fall back to sleep no matter what I do. I literally lay there with eyes closed trying to do breathing exercises or listen to audiobooks and such and it rarely actually works. Or I go to bed and then wake up 2-4 times throughout the night and take anywhere between 15-30min to fall back asleep each time. This results in me only getting 5:30-6:30 hours of total sleep most nights even if I'm in bed for 8-9 hours and even if my wife is super quiet and doesn't wake me when she goes and comes back.

I've also been taking unisom as a sleep aid for the last few months which seemed to help slightly as before I took it I tended to get closer to 5 hours of sleep rather than closer to 6-6.5. I tried melatonin and it didn't do anything other than make me groggy in the morning.

I'm basically looking for advice if anyone else has experienced this and what they did/if it just got better with time. I would be shocked if this isn't partially stress/anxiety related but ya just curious to get other people's takes! Thanks!

1 Comment
2024/06/12
23:38 UTC

5

How do I explain to my partner why my unborn girls name is so important to me?

I'm expecting my first child in October of this year after having surgery on my nads and various medication after infertility for 5 years on my part.

We are having a little girl which I am over the moon about but my partner and I are butting heads over naming her after my great grandmother.

I've never really pushed anything with my Mrs and always supported her decisions but I feel like she isn't really thinking about my thoughts at this time.

My great grandmother meant the world to me and she passed away when I was 11 years of age. Due to how much she meant to me I've suffered with clinical depression and other mental health issues since.

Any advice? I feel like I need to sit down, show her some photos and explain what my nan was like and hopefully she can be swayed. Has anyone experienced the same or similar circumstances?

31 Comments
2024/06/12
23:32 UTC

3

Need help and / or tips with 3yo twins and daycare, about hitting

Hi all. Hope you’re doing awesome. I have 3yo twin boys that are currently in daycare 4 days a week. Me and their mum are 9mo separated but amicable and meet up often and co-parenting is mostly easy.

Over the past 6 months or so, my boys have progressively become more violent towards each other and apparently other children at daycare.

The daycare seem to think it’s only our problem to solve, and as parents we are trying our best and trying both positive reinforcement and calm parenting, but also at times when it is too much I at least have to resort to direct parenting such as shouting “No, we don’t do that, no hitting. You see your brother and how upset he is?” followed by trying to separate them and as they calm down trying to talk more about it.

But it keeps getting worse.

The daycare only bring up hitting and such when we are dropping the boys off or picking them up, which is itself a stressful situation. And we have asked for a meeting to try and develop a plan. Because the daycare currently has our children more hours of the day than we do, and I feel like they’re not acknowledging that this is their problem too, and we can’t fix this on our own. But the daycare is slow and haven’t set up a meeting. And unfortunately the daycare staff are all such where their first language is not English, and regrettably at times it is difficult to feel like we are understanding each other.

Every time, the daycare says “Just talk to them (the boys)” and we do. But I don’t think the daycare is doing this.

Our boys may also be ADHD or neurodivergent, but they are also at an age where what they’re doing (experimenting with the world / testing boundaries) is normal, and so it’s hard to work out what to do.

Hitting at that age is normal, but it is not acceptable.

It feels like it’s hard because we don’t know what the daycare are doing, and we are relying on them for guidance as they are the professionals (it’s a Montessori academy).

I’m worried that our boys are being placed into a “too hard” basket.

Has anyone else experienced problems with daycare like this? And what did you do about it?

I feel like it’s not my kids’ fault. And that the logistics of co-parenting make it harder, especially if the daycare staff are not creating healthy boundaries and trying to work with us.

Thanks and have a fantastic day!

1 Comment
2024/06/12
23:06 UTC

6

Kiddo number 2 is here!!!

And fellas it’s amazing. Nothing quite like it. But there is something I wanted to ask. My wife has been saying this time around that she’s having a hard time connecting with the new little dude and it’s making her feel like a terrible mother. She’s doing great, helps take care of him and is very loving. Any of you or your partners/wives ever experience anything like that before? Any words of comfort I could give her besides “I’m sure it’ll come with time”? Any insight you guys have would be appreciated.

0 Comments
2024/06/12
22:39 UTC

11

What have you found are the best toys to encourage independent play?

Looking for some new toys for my two year old to encourage her to play independently and with a bit of creativity

22 Comments
2024/06/12
22:01 UTC

11

My innovation for cleaning pooey cloths

Dads, it is known that innovation comes from a new invention, or applying existing inventions to a new problem. Behold: my new innovation. What looks like an ordinary clipboard (purchased for $2.50 at officeworks) is in fact my new poop board.

Any dads who use cloth nappies, and reusable cloth wipes, recognize that once their baby starts solids, they need to clean 'solids' before it goes into washing machine. Lo, I struggled, I suffered. Trying to hold the wipes straight to scrub the becursed faeces was difficult and caused occasional encounters of the turd kind.

I thought to myself 'there must be a marginally better way'.

And behold, the poop board.

The idea is that you take your off the shelf, plastic clipboard, and use the clip to hold the pooey wipe, and can put the rest of the wipe on the board for ease of scraping.

Initial tests indeed reveal a marginal improvement. It might not be a game changer, but the first attempt did show promise.

If anybody else is attempting this, I do recommend that you hold the cloth in place - the clip helped, but wasn't sufficient by itself.

May all your poos be ploppable, and your solids easily scraped.

2 Comments
2024/06/12
21:40 UTC

6

Lover’s Day - Son’s first time celebrating with his girlfriend

Today is Lover's Day in my country, a holiday a bit like Valentine's Day in some other countries. It's a day where couples exchange gifts, plan on doing things together, etc. Not a complex concept.

Given my current status, I don't think I'll celebrate it (you never know), first in a while that I might skip.

However, it's also the first my 13 year old boy is celebrating with his first girlfriend. I can see how happy he is. I won't lie, I'm really nervous, but I'm also so happy for him.

Usually he can only go out with his girlfriend if I accompany them, but for this special date I offered a deal: he could go watch a film with her, by themselves, and if they were responsible and were home at the correct time I might, at my own discretion, allow them to go on their own more times. Honestly, I'm just tired of third wheeling two kids, it's a chore.

He said there aren't any good films on. So they'll just celebrate it here at home. His dedication at preparing things, he's growing way too fast.

0 Comments
2024/06/12
20:47 UTC

5

First post but really felt like a dad today

Spent morning with the LO then changed a wing mirror on the car while LO had their nap. For context, never tried to change a wing mirror before, just came naturally as a Dad. Anyone else had some dadding achievements today to add to a great day?

1 Comment
2024/06/12
20:37 UTC

0

What should I get him [33M] for his first Father’s Day?

Our son is almost 10 months old. When I asked him what he wanted to do he said he wanted to spend it together. He likes cars, drifting, RYOBI tools, Fallout games and anime. He has a really nice Nissan 370Z coupe that he doesn’t get to drive much. I looked up some racetracks within an hour and a half radius to see if he could drive his car on one but almost all of them require a membership in order to do that and the one place that allows it requires you to take courses in order to drive alone. They’re very expensive and outside my budget. I have his Home Depot login so I thought about looking at his saved list or cart, but that just doesn’t seem very special. I wanted to make sure his heart feels full knowing he is appreciated and a good father! He’s a great gift giver and I really want this holiday to stand out for him.

For context, we live in central Texas and the weather has been unusually hot and humid lately so being outside is unbearable unless we are around water. We would need to bring our son where ever we go. He’s trying to improve his relationship with food and focus on healthy choices.

10 Comments
2024/06/12
20:25 UTC

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