Hello, I am a 32M and have been taking a journey in better self care this last year. I have taken my health more seriously than previous years, lost 30lbs and been taking a liking to dress better and improve my appearance overall. With that being said, I have been trying to have a better overall grooming experience outside of the normal hair cut and beard trimming.

With anyone’s experience do you prefer to shave or wax your chest hair, thigh area and buttocks?

Any advice or recommendations.

In my relationship, whenever we have a disagreement, my partner tends to shut down and avoid talking about the issue. I try to stay calm and encourage a conversation, but it often feels like I’m hitting a wall.

I want to approach these situations better without making them feel pressured or overwhelmed. Have any of you dealt with this before? How do you create a safe space for communication when emotions are running high?

Looking forward to hearing your experiences or tips!

So me and my boyfriend were having sex this morning & he didn’t wanna really kiss or makeout because we didn’t brush our teeth first & he said “it’s gross”. Are all men like this? I just really don’t care because I’m obsessed with him but he just hates it and think it’s so nasty.

Hello! I am a 21 female & my boyfriend is a 21 male. we both got out of long term relationships in February & we met late june/ early july. we have had a great relationship & we connect a lot on our past. we both were in relationships that were 3 years+ with our high school sweethearts. however i’m being a hypocrite. for some reason i get in my head a lot about his ex. he lost is virginity to her, it was his first relationship, they stayed at his house almost every day & the list continues. although this is the same with my past relationship for some reason it upsets me. i think about his ex a lot. at first i didn’t care but as the relationship progresses the more i think about it. like when he tells me things i always have this thought lingering in the back of my head that he’s told her the same things. she broke up with him & she followed me on social medias. i recently blocked her to have that out of sight out of mind mindset. but it bugs me. how do i not self sabotage? he has done nothing to make me feel like this, i’m the one who presses the questions. i really really like him & i don’t want to screw this up.

I (M22), met this girl over the summer, completely randomly, it turned out we were in the same university studying the same course but in different years, she asked me for my instagram and I got on with my life as normal, it started earlier this semester when she started asking me for help with some topics at uni or asking me for some materials that I had that she needed for her classes,

When I went to give her the things that she needed for class, she told me let’s hang out some time, and to let her know when I’m free and all that, and so I did, I asked her the first time if she wanted to hang out, she said yes, but literally 2 hours before we were meant to meet up she told me that she had something come up and that she wouldn’t be able to make it that night, so I rescheduled to a few days later, where again she cancelled a few hours before, till finally about a week later we met up, the first thing she spoke about when we met up was how tired she was and that she can’t wait to go to bed (it was about 8pm maybe?), anyway we sat down had something to drink and I walked her home, as she turned off into her house, she told me to let her know when she wanted to go out again, so I sent her a message a few days later asking if she wanted to hang out, she replied three days later saying she felt bad and she was in town and bla bla bla,

I then left it, but thought to try one more time last week, and again there was the excuse of her being not in town but she told me we should do another day, I replied saying yes for sure, but she left me on delivered,

I met her yesterday to take back some of the materials I gave her for her classes, and she told me that next week we should go out and do something together, I told her to let me know, she told me no, you let me know, I said yea whatever sure maybe I’ll text you,

Now my question is do I text her and say this is my last time trying, or do I stand my ground and wait for her to text me (even though she probably won’t)?

Edit: she also has mentioned before that she’s a really bad texter and not to take things personal or in a bad way, it’s just how she is.

[25F]So I recently got out of a long term relationship like almost 7 years ..but life happens and it was mutual. Anyways I haven’t been on dating apps or anything because me personally, I just dont care to talk or meet anyone right now esp after being mentally drained from my previous relationship.

That’s just me though.

Ok whats my point? Well I went out with my guy best friend that I knew since we were kids. We started drinking and catching up. But one thing led to another, I don’t remember like 100% that night but I just knew that we ended up kissing at the bar and then we ended up sleeping together right after.

I woke up the next day just confused a bit but yeah we talked it out and laughed it off. But he says and swears that he doesn’t see me any differently. Which idk if that’s true. And we kinda ended up agreeing that we wanna do it again but like sober 😭 So I guess we are friends w benefits or whatever they call it nowadays. We agreed that there won’t be no feelings involved.

But a part of me is confused bc having sex with someone that you trust and known for sooooo long kinda felt right to me.

Does that make sense? Idk I never been in this situation before. But I feel like there was always some sort of tension between us lol.

But doesn’t this type of thing ruin friendships in the long run? He said he doesn’t think so and that he doesn’t view me differently and that we are still best friends regardless what happened but idk. Maybe he’s just saying that just to say it. What do you think?

I see very many post and have read through so many just to try and understand but I’m just not getting the answers I need specifically I (f28) and my bf (m26) have been together for almost a year now in January. The relationship is incredible in every way, except when it comes to watching porn. It’s been a huge division between the two of us and the reason is for that is because I have a bad past with my ex who I was with for 10 years before. We’ve had multiple conversations about it and he’s in no way willing to give it up. In his eyes this is not my past relationship and I shouldn’t be shoving this trauma on to him and taking away something he loves and makes him “him”. Ok fair enough I guess. Between then and now we’ve eventually come to a middle ground and he actually stopped for a little while. I didn’t ask him to he just did it on his own, I must mention We have an amazing sex life I LOVE sex I have an extremely high sex drive and I’m extremely open minded and willing to do anything in bed. For a while everything was going fine until he had an absolute melt down about not watching porn or being able to masturbate, it was so bad that I left the room so he could went out to the living room and played my music and colored to help me keep my mind occupied. This eventually got to the point he was doing it so much at one point he rubbed his dick raw and had scabs, and when we had sex he couldn’t stay hard. This hurt me to my core. But of course I can’t bring it up without turning into a fight. I brought up how him watching it so often was the reason he couldn’t stay hard. He was NOT having that there’s no way that’s possible because he’s not “addicted” to it.. right. So anyway he eventually stopped again (on his own terms) for about a month the sex was incredible and even better then before almost, we do it almost every single day maybe even twice a day. Until this past week. I got a new car and now able to go do things. Now I’m out of the house he’s been doing it so much last night we were having sex and he literally had scabs on his dick. It took me forever to get him hard (it usually never does especially when I give him bjs) in the second something in me just broke. He started trying to fuck me and I could tell he wasn’t even fully hard. Look I get it when I’m gone and everything cool use of porn in moderation is not a problem for me but once it starts effecting our sex life it becomes a problem. But if I even try to bring up how it’s making me feel I get the “it’s not a reflection of our relationship” “it’s a man thing and you’re a woman you wouldn’t understand” “evolution of man brain is the cause of this” literally at this point porn is his priority not me. He doesn’t get it and this point I’m at a loss on how to get him to understand that it IS a problem but he will get SO mad at me and turn into me pushing my own personal issues and views of it on him when that’s not the case at all. It’s gonna be the death of not only our bedroom but if I’m not careful our relationship. I guess my question is what do I do? How do I go about this? I’m at a loss I love him with all my heart but this is becoming exhausting. I forgot to also mention we had talked about it earlier that same day and I expressed my worries of it effecting our sex life and he’s reassured me it won’t but then later that night I realized this is effecting our sex life and since then I haven’t been able to talk about it. It’s effecting me greatly. I just need direction.

So me and my girlfriend were having a conversation one day and I mentioned that I would be down to have a threesome with another girl one day. At first she said she doesn’t like sharing (wasn’t dead set on her statement) but after some talking she said she’d be down and that she was kind of into it. I told her it’d turn me on to have 2 girls on me and also another girl on her. She said that she has thought about it in the past but never acted on it. I mentioned how I WOULDN’T be okay with there being another guy involved ever and she agreed. We haven’t done anything with other girls but when we’re out now, she’ll sometimes mention when she sees a girl she likes how she wouldn’t mind doing it with her. Her taste in women is generally the same as mine so every time she’s done it (only a few times) I have agreed. Usually very pretty, slimmer athletic girls. What’s your guys experience in this and when given the opportunity, have you done it? What ended up happening with you and your partner?

I have been messaging with someone from work for a while now. We have been having some dirty talk and all that.It was all full on for a long time. Basically eye fucking each other when we see each other at work. Our messages recently had been a bit quieter than usual and not what it used to be. We have met up couple of times. We never got to the stage where we would have sex. We did have fun tho in other ways. He would have an excuse every single time. In his messages he told me how and where he would fk me ect. When it comes to action he seems like finding some excuse. Now I'm wondering if we was making things up in his messages and he is actually not as adventurous as he said he is. I don't know what to think or believe. What are your thoughts? Opinion? Experience? I am not sure if I was maybe a little too much and full on. I have a high sex drive. He said he has too. We did agree that this will only be sex nothing more. So I'm a bit confused by his actions.

Yesterday, I got a girl's number at the gym. She gave it to me without hesitation. Today, I stalked her Instagram and found out that she has a boyfriend. What should I do?

I started talking to this guy about two months ago. He is a wonderful guy and I was really sure about him, until a conversation we had this past Tuesday. He came over and told me that his ex reached out to him and wants him back, she's changed and stuff. He told me this the next day, he says he's confused and doesn't know what to do. He knows he doesn't wanna lose me, but he can't really figure out if what he's feeling for me is love or an excitement of a potential new relationship. He said he's gonna make a decision and he wants to see me on Sunday. Am I wrong if I feel like even if he decides to stay ill be making a mistake if I continue seeing him? I want someone who's sure about me, not someone who feels like they have to choose between me and somebody else. Men, have you ever found yourself in this situation? What would you advise me to do? We are not in a relationship, but I just realized it'll really hurt he went back to his ex.

I know in movies friends with benefits eventually turns into relationship and true love and stuff. I’ve never been in a friends with benefits situation and right now i’m in one….will it work out? it’s okie if it doesn’t but i don’t wanna get my hopes up just in case.

My bf 26M held his hand on me a week ago, should I F23 still be with him.

I am F23, my boyfriend M26 have been in relationship for about 2 years and are living together now, A week ago he put his hands on me, I st ill have bruises on my faces. We had a fight, it was my mistake too, but I am shattered on why would he hit me, I donno what to do. I am maintaining distance we haven't talked, he never said sorry. I am doing a mistake staying with him? Should i leave him now? Should I not give another chance?

Hi everyone,

While out drinking with friends I came across a group of people and started hanging out with them. At one point in the night my friends left and I stayed back to hang out with the group I met. Slowly that group started dwindling down as well. I am normally very shy, but when I drink heavily I open up and talk to everyone. I was telling one of these girls in the group all about my girlfriend like how me and her met, and how in a few weeks I’m going to see her for the first time since August. I even showed her all of our pictures. We danced (not inappropriately), talked about random stuff, etc. at around 4 am I decided it’s time I’m gonna go home. I told her I was gonna head out and she came outside with me. I asked her where her friends are so she can go home, she said they left a while ago. I told her I’d walk her back if she’s nearby. She said she doesn’t know where she’s staying and her phone is dead. (I was telling my girlfriend about this situation as it went on)

Things got more complicated because this girl started making advances toward me. She said she’ll come to my spot so we can have sex, and I said no. She would push for it by saying “no one will know” and I told her “but I’ll know” and then eventually she said “if you aren’t going to fuck me at least let me suck you… no one will know,” and grabbed me inappropriately and put her hand down my pants and I wasn’t sure how to react and just sat there and let it happen. It did feel nice and I should’ve stopped it right away but I didn’t. She wanted to pull it out to suck it, I agreed and then shut it down right away before it actually happened because I knew it was wrong and didn’t want to cheat. I asked my girlfriend what I should do and she said just leave her, it felt wrong leaving a heavily intoxicated girl on her own at 4am with no phone and nowhere to go. So I called my friend that left earlier to help me that I was staying with and he said just come to the spot since we were right around the corner and he’ll take control. Turns out he told her she can stay on the bed, I laid on the floor and ended up falling asleep for about 45 minutes, waking up to 15 missed calls since my girlfriend knows a girl came back to the air Bnb and all of a sudden I stop answering. I know that sounds horrible, but I swear on everything and everyone I love nothing happened in that moment. I woke back up and ran outside to call my girlfriend and talk. I don’t know why but I never thought about calling the police to help with the situation which is what I should’ve done.

I am conflicted because I didn’t share every detail, like the fact that I initially said okay to head but stopped right away or that her hand went down my pants. My friends think I didn’t do anything wrong and that I handled the situation as best I could under the circumstances. But I feel like I failed to respect the boundaries of my relationship, and I hate that I hurt my girlfriend. Not to use this as an excuse, but there are many parts of the night I do not remember which shows how drunk I was. Never would I do anything like this sober.

I’ve apologized to her and taken responsibility for my actions, but I’m struggling with guilt and whether I should have done things differently (not even talking to strangers in the first place, calling the police to help instead, etc) I love my girlfriend more than anything but the guilt I’m feeling is eating at me and I don’t know what to do.

We have already had a long talk about that whole weekend and she said she will stay with me but wants me to change my ways because when I drink I am always in these situations where everything could go wrong.

TLDR: got myself in a complicated situation regarding alcohol and a drunk girl hitting on me and put a dent on my relationship

I've (37m) been seeing a girl (36) for about 3 weeks. We've been out to eat, on walks together, and she's been over to my place multiple times to watch movies and the Tyson/Paul fight (no intimacy yet). She has 3 kids: 2 girls (17 and 15) and a boy (11). We're taking things easy at the moment, seeing each other when schedules allow.

Originally her kids were going to be at her ex husband's family's event on Saturday, and I was invited over to hang out and thrash her at Mario Kart. However, at some point her kids got wind of it and are now planning to leave the event early to come home and meet me; they're all extremely curious about their mom's dating life. We discussed it together and we're both ok with me meeting them tomorrow.

So far, from what she tells me, I'm tentatively approved of. I played Fortnite with her, some friends, and her son (online) at one point, right before the first date. A week ago her daughters chased her out of the house so they could deep clean (they had a toilet leak and drip through the floor the day before that), and they told her to go to my place. I also have a dog, which the middle one is desperate for, so that won her over.

I did actually speak with them last night over FaceTime. Mom was over at my place for a movie, and the oldest one was feeling sick so called her to ask about medicine. The youngest one asked what I look like, so Mom put us both on screen so I could "meet" them, and I eventually got to see and talk to all of them. It was very friendly, they were giggly and silly and sort of feeding off each other's energy, and I felt like things went pretty well.

I've never been in this situation before, most matches on dating apps tend to fizzle out in the texting phase. I know that she has, and it went horribly wrong (she was at the guy's place with her kids, he guy got drunk and threatened her and touched one of her daughters). So I recognize and really appreciate the trust she's placed in me by letting me meet her kids this early in.

I want to make a good impression on her kids; she's told me no cringy jokes, no kid slang, bring the dog, like football. Planning to do all of that. What advise or tips or experiences can you share with me to help this go well and help me get her kid's approval?

Edit: I read and I really appreciate all the feedback I got from everyone here. Thank you all so much!

I texted mom with some of the concerns I'd been having (wording was guided by some of what you more eloquent fellows said here), as well as something I hadn't thought of, discussing with the ex (he was out of their lives for a bit but now he's more involved). I asked her for her thoughts.

She just texted back: she gave it some thought, and discussed with a friend of hers, and she agrees that we should postpone until a later point. She said the kids will be disappointed by the news but she's going to explain that it isn't "about them" personally, but instead it's about protecting them and that I would still love to meet them someday soon.

Again, thank you all!

I’ve been seeing a guy for about three months. We have not had the exclusivity conversation but it’s apparent that neither of us are pursuing anything with others. Things are still fresh and new, but we are very compatible. Communication has been very healthy so far, but we are still in a very early stage of things. After discussing it, we have agreed to take things very slow. We haven’t even slept together yet.

It’s obvious and has been discussed that we’re both smitten with each other. However, the other day, he made a joke (or I think it was a joke) about marrying me. We were talking about old TV shows. I asked how he felt about a certain show, because it was my favorite. He then proceeds to turn and look at me in this goofy but intense way and says “I’ve seen every episode around five times. We must marry immediately.” Of note, he has been married before, but got a divorce about four years ago after his wife cheated on him. He started dating again about two years ago.

I giggled and sort of brushed it off because I was taken aback. But, that comment is driving me insane. (I am aware that the obvious thing to do here is ask him what he meant by that, but again, we’re three months in to this. The last thing I want to do is seem like I’m making some MASSIVE assumptions about what’s going on here.)

Anyways, my question: any idea as to how much of a joke that actually was? Do guys joke about that casually? Or is this one of those half-jokes where he actually means something by it? Frankly I am not sure what to think. Other than this, the communication between us has been very healthy, so I’m hesitant to take it as a red flag but am open to perspectives on that.

I am going to write to my awesome boyfriend and tell him all the things I love about him. I was wondering,as men, what would mean the most to you, to hear you were loved for by your significant other?

My (soon to be) ex-husband sat me down to tell me, firstly, that he never cheated on me but then proceeded to tell me he’s been a porn addict for the entirety of our relationship and has spent around $20k in live porn sites where you pay to “direct” the performers to do what you want. This feels like cheating to me. My whole body feels like I’ve been cheated on for the entirety of my relationship. I’m emotionally and mentally experiencing the trauma of being cheated on. How does he not see this as cheating? Do men not see this as cheating?

Was dating(acc to me) this single man in 40's who is afraid to commit, because he doesnt want to get married ever (figured out i invited a booty call and was a situationship). Upon asking if it's really over. He replied No and want some time. He hasn't been responding msgs since then though he reads it (ghosted but not blocked). Almost been a week. Does he genuinely need personal space and time? How long should I be waiting? Would he really come back?

To add, we never had any fights or confrontations for 10months of this relationship. This is first time something happened. We always had good moments together and were compatible by all means.

lately, i've been talking to this guy, and it's only been a few weeks, but i already like him so much. honestly, i didn't think it was even possible for me to feel this way about anyone anymore-it kind of caught me off guard. but there's something that's been bothering me. before we started talking, he was in a pretty serious relationship with another girl. they were together for a long time, and it wasn't just a one-time thing-they broke up and got back together twice. they've been broken up for a while now, but i can't help feeling a little nervous about it. what if he hasn't completely moved on from her? or what if i don't live up to the person she was in his life? he's definitely shown interest in me, and he's been so kind and sweet, which makes me feel like this could really go somewhere. but at the same time, i'm scared. i don't want to get hurt, and i don't want to overthink, but the fear is there. any advice on how to navigate this would really help.

as men, do you guys get over a girl like that??

These days we have been barely talking. Yesterday we discussed this issue and he said he will do something about it. But today he is rn watching live satsang. I want to know if I should just leave him alone or talk it out 😭 Is it wrong of me for wanting to be prioritized over that?

Im in a tricky situation where a friend (23F) and I (25M) have strong chemistry but know there is unlikely to be longevity in a relationship. There is a TLDR at the bottom but for those interested, the story is as follows:

A few months ago I moved to a newly opened gym and started to get along really well with one of the staff members.

After ~3 weeks of me going to this gym, the staff member and I had started to develop somewhat of a friendship. This mainly included having brief chats everytime we saw each other at the gym, her giving me the occasional free coffee, and exercising together a couple times (both happened to be there at the same time). By this point I was convinced there was some chemistry between us that I couldn't help but wanting to explore.

On one particular afternoon, I went to the gym in the afternoon to pick up a water bottle I had left the night before (we had spoken / exercised together that previous night). To my surprise she was there again at the gym exercising, where she mentioned she'd be working till late that night.

After retrieving my bottle and leaving the gym, I went home, had dinner, put on my exercise clothes and went back to the gym, with only one purpose - ask out this girl and get her number.

I walk into the gym where she immediately sees me whilst being occupied with a customer. I thought oh shit my plan has failed and started chatting to another friend in the gym to keep my cool. Next minute she comes up to me asking why I am back and I said "I'm here to ask you out for a drink". She said yes and gave me her number.

Fast forward a couple weeks, we had gone out with some of her friends but not quite got a drink 1 on 1. The first night I went out with her friends it was pretty strange and not at all what I had hoped for.

The next week we spoke about the night and came to terms that it's probably best we stay friends. The main rationale was that she didn't want anything to happen that might make her new job at the gym weird or awkward. We both agreed that we really enjoyed spending time with each other and that a friendship would be valuable

Fast forward another few weeks and we were catching up more frequently outside the gym and texting daily (sending lots of memes to each other). At this point I could feel my intentions for a friendship being heavily challenged so I let her know I needed to take a step back in the friendship to gather my bearings again.

We didn't speak for almost a week, apart from briefly bumping into each other a couple times at the gym. Through this short period I thought I had come to terms with us never developing anything more than a close friendship. This was due to us having differing religious beliefs, albeit having very similar outlooks on life, especially towards relationships.

We began messaging again pretty consistently and during this week alone went out for dinner and were at gym together multiple times. Yesterday we both had the day off so decided it would be nice to head outdoors for a day trip. We ended up spending ~ 12 hours in each other's company where we finished the day off with a few beers at a pub. Throughout a lot of the day we spoke more about how our values align yet acknowledged our differing religious outlooks. Neither of us greatly observse out respective religions, yet feel they are part of our identities (Im Jewish and she is Christian).

We laughed a bunch, overcame challenges, had great conversation all day together and I now I'm convinced there is mutual attraction/ interest in something more than just a friendship. The trajectory of our friendship is following a similar trend to how most of my past relationships have started (organically meet > start hanging out a bunch > start becoming physically intimate)

I'm at a bit of a cross roads, on the one side I'm still not 100% sure if she is just enjoying the friendship for what it is. On the other side, the more we hang out, the more the chemistry between us grows. I think we are both hesitant to take the friendship any further based on the conflict of religious interest, but I don't know how to digest my current emotions towards her.

TL;DR, I met a staff member at a new gym and asked her out. After hanging out a bit we agreed to be friends due to her new job and a conflict of religious interests. We started hanging out a bunch more and realised we have very similar outlooks on life, especially towards relationships. Today we spent ~12 hours together and I am feeling the chemistry is now too good where I don't know how to digest the situation any more.

Is she leading me on? If not, how might I go about suggesting we try develop our relationship further? If she is just enjoying our friendship, is it wise of me to invest more time and energy? Please give me your most constructive advice!

I (29F) haven’t dated in years so I really don’t know how to read people. I met this guy and we have communicated that it is going to be casual. I’m leaving in a few months, so it’s not like we have a future. We don’t text all the time, and honestly, I don’t want to. It is daily though, and engaging. He initiates time together and has been available when I’ve initiated as well. He has expressed that he finds me very attractive multiple times. We went out on a date recently and made out, and I had been attempting to initiate some physical contact and my body language was definitely showing my interest. It took forever for him to make a move. I know I can do it, I’m just back in the game and don’t want to throw myself at people. Since it’s casual, I expected him to put his hands on me and try to move faster. He kept his hands mostly to himself and we ended the kissing. I’m used to a little more forwardness. He then texted me and said “my lil [nickname]”. He doesn’t text overly sexually either. I can’t tell if he’s nervous and why he won’t move faster with me. Our expectation is something with no strings attached and I thought he would come onto me stronger sexually. Is there a reason he would be moving slower than anticipated? He’s definitely not against casual sex either.

I am not a gamer in any capacity and as of recent, his gaming habits have in my opinion gotten so much worse. Right now, with the sleep schedule he has right now he wakes up in the middle of the night because he can’t sleep, games, and I usually see him playing as I am getting ready for work every single day in the morning. It has become such a sensitive topic because of our past arguments but to me it is a really hard habit and damaging at this point. I am having such a hard time removing my feelings of it because I am so irate. There are so many things he could be doing: laundry, reading, cleaning that NEEDS to be done or else it falls on me. I have passions that are not the same but in a sense I also cling to them, however they are not as harmful in my opinion as I do them at the appropriate time and capacity. I really don’t have it in my heart to let his video games ruin my perception of him and in turn our relationship. How can I make this better?

I found out about 4 months ago that my (25f) bf now fiancé (24m) cheated on me the whole first year of our relationship. As of right now, we’ve been together over and a half now. He didn’t physically cheat, but he exchanged nudes with a female “friend”, and sent her a combined total of at least $1000 over that year because she would ask him for money for Ubers etc and he would give it, no questions asked. On top of that, he followed hundreds and hundreds of OF models and porn stars on instagram, and he watched a lot of porn. He has (currently) several porn apps on his phone and that’s all he uses reddit for, too. I’ve struggled with feeling like he’d rather jerk off for an hour and a half (which he does EVERY time he jerks off) than have sex with me. He jerks off now like once a week (which is a big change from him trying to do it while I’m asleep, etc), but we also only have sex once a week if that. It just upsets me that he can talk about all this sexual stuff to this girl “friend” frequently, but we have the same type of sex every time, and it’s all just very vanilla when I know that he has non-vanilla interests.

I found out he cheated because he accidentally left his phone at home (we live together), and I was already suspicious with how he would turn his phone away when I would sit next to him, always places his phone face down, and other small behaviors. So I looked through his phone and found a lot of exchanges on instagram with this one girl, including nudes, sexting, and they’d send each other OF insta models and comment on them. He also had her on snapchat where I assume ever more explicit stuff happened. He also had a couple messages on insta to other random girls saying they were “beautiful”, but luckily they responded with “what about your gf?” I immediately confronted him when he came back to get his phone - I didn’t want to tell anyone in my personal life in case this relationship could be saved. So I’ve been holding this weight on my shoulders for months now. I said “yes” to the engagement because both our families knew it was coming and I didn’t want to go through the drama at the time, and I really do love him. He’s my best friend but he has broken me (emotionally). I’m in therapy and him and I talk a lot to try to rebuild, and I’m honestly just terrified of starting over. I found out a few weeks ago that he DM’d a girl on insta who’s page is literally just her mostly naked body (not an official OF girl or anything), and he sent “hey”, and she didn’t respond. And the best reason he can give me for all of this is that he doesn’t know why he did any of this but it’s the worst mistake he’s ever made.

I guess I’m just venting at this point, sorry about that….i just keep going back and forth on what to do, I’m so lost and confused. I love him so so much and I’m so sad that he did this to me…I want us to work out but shit, I don’t know.

For the men….what drives you to cheat on your long term significant other when you want that relationship to actually work out?? I just don’t understand.

My boyfriend '28M', and I '30F', have been together for a year. We get along well, there are flaws sometimes and arguments, but nothing that lasts longer than 5 minutes. Otherwise, I'm a really relaxed person and Im not into pompous events. But I thought it would be nice to celebrate the first anniversary of the relationship. I mentioned that to him and he agreed with it. We talked about it about 15 days in advance a couple of times and I mentioned a couple of ideas where we could etc. none of the ideas really impressed him, but that was fine with me, a nice dinner was also enough for me. I thought that maybe he would come up with an idea also. The day before the anniversary we talked and through the conversation I realized that he had absolutely nothing planned or booked a restaurant and he expected me to do it, which I did, I found the restaurant where we were going. On aniversarry day he was late, i.e. he picked me up very late (I know he works a lot, but I work just as much) so I hardly found another restaurant that is open that late.

In the empty restaurant he told me that he wasn't hungry at all because he ate a huge burger 2 hours before we had an appointment. I ate alone and cried, I was so disappointed. Not to mention I didn't get a single little flower. I prepared a very sentimental and personalized gift for him that I didn't give him at the end. I really didn't expect more than chocolate or flowers and I would have been the happiest in the world. While he comforted and calmed me while I was eating and crying in the middle of the restaurant, he said in one moment that he felt guilty, that he was very sorry and that he would make things right next year. But he also said that he doesn't understand my drama and so much sadness because I should actually be grateful that we are simply together at all and that we are sitting together cuz that is the most important thing and we need to appreciate small things. That I should smile and be happy. I feel unappreciated and miserable and stupid. I must mention that during our entire relationship he rarely plans things, but he will gladly go along with everything I plan. He knows that it bothers me and I asked him several times to plan something and surprise me sometime. Otherwise he is very bright and intelligent and we communicate openly and he listens to me well when I have a problem. But in this situation I have the feeling that he doesn't understand absolutely anything what im saying. Fast forward - at the end of the dinner, when I ate my lasagna, I asked him to take me home and that I didn't want him to sleep at my place and that i want to be alone. He was quite offended by that. I left without saying goodbye and we haven't heard from each other since. One day has passed since then. I really am not sure how to proceed with this relationship, how to work on it. And is it even worth it. please advice!

I know the automatic answer is probably "no the past is the past" but please hear me out.

We broke up- it was a short but intense relationship for both of us. It got to the cusp of him meeting my family, but when it came down to it he "couldnt handle" a relationship, especially one with someone that "accepted everything about him" in his words. He seems quite avoidant attachment tbh but idk. He did seem as if he didn't want to hurt me. He begged me to "hate him" to think about how he's just "throwing me away".

We said we'd remain friends, but things happened and that wasn't the case. He did try and apologise for his behavior post-breakup a year after we broke up, but he was drunk and confusing and weird, so it wasn't really like an "apology".

Its been a few years now- I've recently ran into him a couple at a festival, where we chatted casually once amongst a group. But any time I saw him after that, I ended up in that "unexpectedly seeing my ex" fight or flight thing and just blanked him despite making eye contact or seeing he was staring at me.

I guess I just feel guilty/petty for being like that. He hurt me bad, worse than anyone ever has, but I dont hate him, and I worry thats how it comes across. I feel like enough time has passed since we broke up that it wouldn't be weird to send him a Facebook friend request, but I don't know. It's not a case of me wanting to be nosey as his account is public anyways. There's no intention of getting back together.

I (29f) am meeting a man (40) after over a year of talking, calling and facetiming with this whole year being presumably exclusive. He bought me a first class flight next month and I'd like to bring him a small token of my appreciation for him. I don't want a grand gesture, just something small and useful that I can bring on a flight. He likes fishing, hunting, watching movies and he's a little bit of a health nut (no soda, candy, fast food, etc). Any ideas? I was thinking of getting a cool tackle or a funky bow tie but would appreciate input. Thanks in advance!

Hi, I’m 25F, my boyfriend 24… we recently just had a baby. They’re 1 month old now… my great grandmother died last night and I found my bf messaging someone on discord, he said she’s hot and he would love to eat her out in the mornings… now this isn’t the first time he’s done this. He has a awful porn addiction. But it’s the kind we’re it’s instagram and OF people. He’s like some weird dude. You would think he’s ugly and fat playing games all day with the things he does. It’s random girls working out too. Creeper behavior. Hundreds of photos of women on his phone. Idk what to do anymore…. He has everything he could ever want. He takes care of me but I have him a house, 2 cars. My parents have blessed us. My other grandparents died and I got the house before I met him, he moved in, I had a car already but when I got pregnant my dad paid for a 4 door sedan…. They buy him Christmas presents and make him apart of my family. My dad has even tried to offer him business proposals so he could make good money. They even tried to offer him a different job like a 9-5 since he never went into business with my dad. I just don’t understand the selfishness…. Idk what to do anymore. I never wanted my baby to be without parents. I never wanted a baby like this. I think the worst thing too is he’s been pressing to have sex more, it’s only been about to be 6 weeks. My doctor appointment is at 7weeks tho… technically it’s safe ig but I never got the dc approved for sex. Well I caved in. It was uncomfortable, and then to see that’s hir this morning hurt like hell…