I keep hearing about this trend that men and women are becoming more and more ideologically different. Also which type of men and women is this happening to? Is it mostly straight? White?

Should I be concerned?

We live in an extremely capitalistic society which empathizes the accumulation of wealth, and the system promises more social mobility. I’m extremely anticapitalist and I can very much understand why someone would go for that. So why, especially in a capitalistic system are women shamed for wanting someone more wealthy?

There are many things around retirement age in general, in some countries women retire earlier than men, but not in most countries, theres also the posiblity that both men and women are gonna retire later in the future because of economical problems, so lowering retirement age to one or both genders doesnt seems like something that can we done without causing a some problems There's also the objective of making the goverments accept all transgenders as the gender they identify with and not the gender the we're born, applying this on the retirement age What do You all think?

For those of you that don’t know, in Australia we are currently having widespread protests over domestic violence as we are the grip of a spike in intimate partner homicide predominantly perpetrated by men against woman.

I have a serious question about this. I read the other day that the majority of homicides world wide and including Australia are perpetrated against men by men. However, I am assuming that the majority of intimate partner murders are perpetrated by men against women.

Is there a particular rational behind focusing on reducing domestic related murder as opposed trying to reduce the overall murder rate? It appears that homicide rates are highly gendered, but it depends how you break down the statistics as to which gender is impacted disproportionately.

I’m a girl, but recently I started to see, that I support feminism’s ideas. But I feel confused, that I liked in the past sexually objectified women in video games (only because of the female characters’ designs I loved MK9, oh god… I feel terrible now remembering it…). Now I don’t know how to feel about myself, because I like such designs, but their purpose makes me scared about the fact, that I might have been brainwashed all the time and I should actually hate extremely sexualized female characters … So I want to know what you think.

They used to be the most vocal supporters of trans men and would cancel anyone who dared to speak otherwise but also this is happening in England also

I’ve talked about this with a lot of people, and most of them have said that women wouldn’t use it. The thing is, I know a lot of women who would, including myself. I think there should be a space for women to show up to and say, “I just wanna get fucked. Who’s in?” No mixing with and scaring people who are looking to actually date, no need to maintain a pretense of chastity, and no threat of getting kicked off for listing your kinks and desires on your bio. But unsolicited nudes and harassment are still off-limits because men in particular often don’t know how to conduct themselves.

Am I insane? Why or why not?

I want to hear from the male feminists here in particular. What do you think of how stigmatized effeminate behaviors are in men? Why do you think women reinforce these ideals? How can we prevent such behaviors from making men feel inadequate or insecure?

Link to article on it:

• https://apnews.com/article/planned-parenthood-abortion-missouri-defunding-3e09e1517bf9c1cfa8fa92306a63a404

Is this an example of the type of things Republicans will go after once abortion is banned? A taste of things to come in a post-Project 2025 world? Do you think there’s any chance of convincing conservatives to support some of these services, enough to oppose the party on them?

I just want to preface this by asking people to understand that I'm ignorant and not asking anything out of malice or malintent. I'm a feminist but not somebody who is very well studied in the field of feminism. So I would appreciate being more educated on the A lot of matters.

That being said, when I refer to the "patriarchy" in this context, I'm talking about the current systems in place that disproportionately and negatively affect both women and men in a harmful ways especially when they perpetuate harmful stereotypes and stigmas.

I know that the main goal is to break down the systems of the patriarchy so that we can achieve equity and equality between the Sexes and genders. However, I'm wondering if there are any aspects of the current systems in place that we should keep around? Which aspects of the patriarchy are those, if any? Or do you just scrap everything and start over? How does that work? How do you start doing that as an individual?

Women are being interviewed and asked if they need men, and most of the women say no and laugh about the notion of needing men.

Is a person misogynist for hating a woman or is he a misogynist for a hating a woman because she is a woman ?

In discourse about the choice to save for marriage or not, a common theme I’ve seen is to not “let men objectify you” by sleeping with them.

Can a woman objectify herself? Or is objectification a choice a man makes to perceive a woman as an object?

The thing that prompted this question was seeing my mother go through her menopause. Not just her, all my aunts, some had multiple visits to hospitals because of problems related to menopause. But media almost never talks about something every woman has to go through, so I am curious, what are such things that media doesn't talk about?

Hey, folks! I've been pondering the topic of children having access to puberty blockers and hormones, and I'm curious to hear your thoughts.

What do you think about Jujutsu kaisen female characters? Fans say that the remaining female characters are empty robots and call Gege misogynists. For some reason, there are so many strong female characters. They sexualized it too much and said it was poorly written. Fans said I was confused. What do you think about the current female characters? Did Gege ruin the female characters?

Basically the title. I (32M) am not romantically or sexually attracted to women in any substantial way, so there's nothing I can or will contribute as a romantic partner to a woman/women. I try to stay aware of societal power dynamics that favor me and disfavor the women around me, especially by reflecting on and checking the biases that would cause me to replicate those power dynamics if I'm not aware. I try to respect my women supervisors, professors and colleagues just as much as I do the men, recognizing their expertise, listening to their perspectives, accepting their directives when they have authority over me and trying to stay humble and recognize when I don't know and they do. I try to view my mother, sister and niece as the complex and wonderful beings they are, possessing every bit as much value and capacity as me. I especially try not to take my mother's emotional and physical labor for granted, to take care of my own tasks and show appreciation and respect when she does something on my behalf that she doesn't have to do.

I could go on for a while but basically I want to do right by the women in my life and would love some pointers. What do you want to see more of from queer men generally speaking?

Why do feminist use the term "I can do anything a man can do" doesn't that mean that you base your value off how much like a man you are, why.

it is almost devaluing women in general because you are saying that to be good at being a woman you have to be more like a man. Cant you just be good at being a woman

EDIT:

Hello people, i have it now

My line of thinking was that if men a good at this and women are good at this, why are women doing stuff they are not as good at, after some reflection i have found out why.

Modern advancements have opened loopholes in biological capabilities, since wars arent physical fighting anymore, since buisness mostly isnt actually working, producing, selling anymore, since building isnt actually building with your bare hands but using mechanical strength, it is easier for women to do the same thing as men even if they arent at the same biological and physical level.

My thinking was to traditional, back then your success was linked to how good you were compared to others, now technology sets the standard and anyone that knows how to use it is at the same level as everyone else.

This means that you could be horrible at something but you are still at the same level as someone great at it.

Sorry for any disruption, i am only just realising how much modern technology ruined todays society and made it almost impossible to actually succeed at anything.

Have a blessed day.

i’m sorry I know this might sound stupid, but I’m still getting like familiar with this whole feminist thing. I mean I have nothing against him whatsoever. I do agree with a lot of stuff. I’m learning from people but a lot of things I don’t understand. And this question is coming from someone who is autistic.

If a woman tells you they are on the pill and shows u the pills aswell then you find out they actually aren’t on the pill just been throwing them away does that oblige me to take care of the child or not because I’m quite conflicted here asking for a woman’s opinion

So I’m the furthest thing from a moral philosopher but I’ll do my best to briefly put down what I’ve taken away from two videos of the neuroscientist/philosopher Sam Harris discussing his views on moral objectivity (videos posted below for anyone interested).

As I understand it, Harris asserts that when it comes to questions of right and wrong and good and evil, what we’re really talking about is wellbeing/flourishing/happiness on one end and suffering on the other. And that since those are states of consciousness that we can make objective claims about, we can therefore use a scientific method to answer moral questions of how to get to/avoid those states respectively. Essentially, by understanding the mind and consciousness more and more, and the nature of happiness and suffering as states of consciousness, we can answer moral questions in a more objective, and I suppose authoritative, way. We could, hypothetically, work out the answers to moral questions with as much rigour and confidence as we could a maths problem.

Like I said, I’m no moral philosopher and that’s just how my brain understood his position but I suppose I find it compelling and maybe even a little hopeful? I mean if we can apply a more scientific (hopefully meaning ‘effective’) method to making the world a better/more moral place, I would think that’s a good thing for movements like feminism.

But I’d love to hear everyone else’s thoughts.

These are the two videos of Sam Harris that I was referring to if anyone is interested:

https://youtu.be/vEuzo_jUjAc?si=Lbgvcg9-KWqkbZFW

https://youtu.be/B6-A5eak14w?si=MxJP-4yciordNvQI

I've been reading The Dialectic of Sex by S. Firestone and I was a bit confused by her origin of sexism / the patriarchy / the sex system.

She says that in pre-history, women and men held different roles in society which led to the sex / caste system that still exists today, and she says this system is rooted in 'human nature'. As she writes it, they are "oppressive power structures set up by nature and reinforced by man".

What I don't understand (or maybe she doesn't explain) is how this is so? In the first chapter, she basically is explaining how it is 'human nature', that men and women perform different functions even in early societies. But there is no explanation of how these differences led to domination. Basically, I do not doubt that many early societies had a women being the primary caretakers etc, but this isn't inherently a class / caste system as she claims, it needs to be made so by men. And if it is made by men, it is neither human nature nor 'set up by nature' as she says.

Am I missing something? Thoughts on this?

It’s been on my reading list for a while but it’s like a $70 book. What gives?

What are some things that contribute to the patriarchy that we men do and are unaware of?

Does anyone have any content (book, YouTube, podcasts) recommendations to UNLEARN objectification and sexualization of women?

In 1970, the college enrollment rate was about 60% men and 40% women. Now, the numbers are reversed. So why do women-only scholarships still exist? If the first statistic was sexist (which it was), then wouldn’t the enrollment rate now also be sexist?

Genuinely curious if dating is difficult when you identify as feminist, or is the dating pool better when it comes to male feminists or is it a non issue?

This question is mostly for heterosexual feminist but I'd be curious about LGBTQ responses as well.

Edit: Appreciate all the honest answers, yall. I'm getting the sense that perhaps there is a growing number of considerate men that are responsive to feminist ideals.

Good to hear we're evolving.

I want to Share something that's really been bothering me lately. Please, assume the principle of Hanlon's razor with me AKA don't assume malice from me to what could be attributed to stupidity or ignorance. I'm trying to have a good faith discussion. I didn't come here to burn bridges and start a war.

With that being said, there's a YouTuber ( i edited out the youtuber's name because I don't want to promote potentially problematic or controversial views, as has been pointed out to me in the comments) that has a partner shaming series where she calls out other women for partner shaming and double standards against men. She claims to be egalitarian. She claims to be both pro woman and pro man, namely in that she identifies as both egalitarian and feminist. She's says she's just all about fairness and equality. Which is what, I believe, feminism should be about.

However, I feel like some people who brand themselves as feminists unintentionally spread misinformation about what feminism is and subsequently give feminism a bad reputation by perpetuating misandry and double standards against men and calling it equality. In said youtuber's (rough) words: "How can you expect to get anywhere close to the equality finish line if you ignore half the population's issues by solely focusing on your own?"

Maybe I'm wrong (and please tell me if I am). But I feel that If your version of feminism includes hating men, taking advantage of them, or perpetuating harmful stereotypes, you're not a feminist; You're a misandrist.

One of the things said youtuber said stood out to me in particular. She was talking about this graph of research that showed the increasing political divide between men and women. Something about how men were becoming more conservative and women were becoming more liberal.

And she said something like "well duh, you basically have a society that just doesn't give a shit about men. And then you go on tiktok or Instagram and see these partner shaming videos of the small but vocal minority of women doing all these harmful things to men. But if a man went on social media and made posts like these, they'd be branded incels. But these tiktok videos will get millions of views and 80k+ heart reacts. And people wonder why men are becoming more conservative? People like Andrew tate look at this trend and see these disenfranchised men and say 'here is a space for you'. They take advantage of how society shits on men by turning that vulnerability into hatred against women. The gun was already loaded by society. People like Andrew tate just take that gun and point it at women."

She put it a lot more eloquently than I could. But that was the general gist.

Anyway, I will say it again. Please assume Hanlon's razor with me. i didn't come here to start a war. I came here to see what other feminists think about this concept. For clarity, I also consider myself a feminist as well. Are my thoughts problematic? Am I crazy for feeling this way?

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

This edit is being made after writing the original post above, and reflecting upon the discussions that I've seen after 4 hours. I wanted to create this comment as Separate to the rest of this post as a summary of the things I'm learning, have learned, and am continuing to learn as well as my personal subjective feelings. I am honestly feeling really emotional, overwhelmed, appreciative, hurt, and also informed. A lot of mixed feelings. I understand that my views are problematic and that My own subjective feelings can't be taken without external context and that context has been given to me with several comments in this post, regardless of how it's phrased and regardless of how I feel about it. I have directly and indirectly learned a lot tonight. I learned that said Youtuber is problematic because, regardless of what side of the fence you stand on, it's still important to advocate against problems and problematic behavior but, more importantly, polarizing views aren't going to get the job done. They never will. Polarization just separates people. My views are polarizing. That much has been made really really clear to me tonight. I will always consider myself a feminist and nothing will ever change that. I will continue to advocate for women's rights, call out problematic behaviors even when they're my own, protect the women around me in the ways that I am able to, and I'm going to admit when I'm wrong and trust me, I'm wrong. I honestly am just speaking from my heart when I say this. I don't mind if it gets agreed with or downvoted into oblivion. I understand that my views are problematic and I am still learning and I have every intention to be better and to grow and move forward with more objectively healthier viewpoints. I've learned that even my subjective experiences have data driven behind them that shows that I'm only seeing the surface of a lot of issues and that that which initially seems problematic to me is extremely problematic but for many opposite reasons, reasons which you all have outlined to me tonight. I do read your comments. I have read every single one of them. I will continue to read every single one of them. However, I do have to be honest about one thing: I have Attempted to engage in good faith (and a lot of ignorance) with this post for four hours today and I am left feeling like I am not welcome here. I don't know what else to say. I have a lot to process right now. I realized i need to walk away from this. I'm a mental health therapist. I have a responsibility to learn and grow, for both myself and for the safety and wellbeing of the clients that I work for. I am getting up in the morning for them and I have to make sure my attitude, my views, and my behaviors (conscious or unconscious) don't harm them. I realize when I need to walk away from something though. I realized that when I was talking to my girlfriend tonight about my views and the ones shared with me on this post tonight, and she said "Alex, I've never seen you this upset over something somebody said to you on the internet. Why are you letting people on reddit get to you like this? Do you realize that the majority of people in the world don't even exist on the internet?". And she's right. I shouldn't be taking anything personally, and I'm trying not to. Ultimately it was the best and most patient woman I've ever met who helped me recognize that polarization isn't the answer and that I can learn a lot of meaningful things from people that I don't see eye to eye with by listening to and understanding them as a person on the other side of these pixels on our screens. She also said to me "Alex, it's not what you say that bothers people necessarily, it's how you say it." And she's right. That's always been a problem I need to work on. I want you all to know that every one of you has your valid experiences with feminism. I have to understand those reasons. I still have a lot to understand. And that's very humbling. Thank you for your time tonight. And I truly am sorry for anything I said that might have been interpreted maliciously. That was not my intention.

What criteria if any need to be met for you to say that feminism (according to your own personal beliefs, not a monolithic view of feminism.) has accomplished it's goal?