My last 100 sets took a year to complete and it helped to get underneath some of my psychological hurdles. That was about 3 months ago. This 100 set challenge is about taking action more consistently, getting to the finish line in 2 months. Also this time I have a coach who is helping me out as well.

My goals for this new 100set challenge are:

1. Do 20 approaches a week
2. Reflect and journal after each day's action
3. Validate myself instead of seeking it from women
4. Be vulnerable (with myself first - this is based on readings from Mark Manson's book Models)
5. Develop 5 stories about myself that support self-validation and can be used during convos with women for building value
6. Identify 5 convo games that can be used to keep the interaction fun and flirty
7. Practice push-pull 10 times
8. Spend less time on social media and watching TV, use it instead to plan, take action and reflect

Hi all, I'm turning 33 in a couple months. I feel hopeless in my dating life. The girls that want me are the girls I don't find compatible for long term relationships.

The only hope I have is through daygame approach. I can approach but it's rare. My specialty seems to be nightlife, and I just don't like the girls I end up with from there.

At 29 I was a virgin, so I've felt like I had a lot of catching up to do. So to accelerate some progress I bought bootcamps. I could nervously approach through these bootcamps. However after the bootcamp ended, I could never go out alone to daygame approach.

I'm glad I found this subreddit. I'm hoping that I can start this 100 set challenge for August. For now I want to start small - progressive desensitization - and approach only by asking for directions (My AA is high).

I am starting with 7. I need to do 93 more before the end of the month. I'm hoping this will give me progress to the next phase. Here's my overall game plan for the future for the 'progressive desensitization of approach anxiety:'

Phase 1 - 100 Directional Approaches

Phase 2- 100 Compliment Approaches

Phase 3 - 100 Daygame Approaches

If anyone wants to jump on a call to keep each other accountable, that would be really cool.

Good luck to all of you who resonate.

I have realized, and let me know what you think about this. I know a lot of people is going to downvote this, but I'm going to say this anyway.

I think that weather, current events affect how receptive women are. Like if you're in New York City and the Yankees win the world Series. , the vibe of the city will be really good and you have a higher chance of catching a check more likely just screwing her.

If you're in a democratic place in the hated Republican is out of office I'll be so much easier to do something

If the weather is nice like not too hot but cool and not cold and it's sunny women are more receptive.

So on and so on what do you think

So I'm sure many times on this subreddit that we have had somebody talk about or post about a girl who doesn't initiate conversation but replies quick.

The only difference this girl I'm talking to is friends with another woman that I ended a friendship with. Should I keep talking to the girl that replies quick? Is she interested? I don't know what else to explain just ask me some questions

Date: 5/12/2024

Location: Gym and local coffee shop

Preparation and Mindset

I approached this outing with a clear goal in mind: to start a conversation with at least one lady at the gym and to utilize his favorite coffee shop's busy setting for further social interactions. I prepared by visualizing success, especially motivated by a previously less successful night.

First Impressions

At the gym, I complimented a group of ladies on their exercise routine, specifically mentioning their impressive weighted wall sits. The approach was positively received, though the conversation was brief due to the other party being in a hurry.

Conversation Flow

While the gym interaction was short, I had more substantial conversations at the coffee shop. He strategically positioned himself at the corner of the bar where there was the most foot traffic, which facilitated easier initiation of conversations.

Body Language and Engagement

I did not use headphones at the gym, which made him more approachable and open to social interactions. This small change significantly improved his social availability. Body language specifics were not detailed, but the approach setting at the coffee shop was conducive to engaging conversations.

Closing the Interaction

The brief gym interaction ended as the lady had to leave in a hurry; I respectfully let her continue with her workout without pressing the conversation further. At the coffee shop, conversations did not have specific closing details mentioned.

Overall Impression and Feelings

I felt confident during his interactions, especially at the coffee shop. He noted a challenge in initiating conversation with people who were a bit farther away from his immediate vicinity.

Personal Highlights

I had a positive interaction with an attractive lady at the coffee shop, where the conversation lasted longer than at the gym, marking a highlight of the outing.

Learning Points

The outing reinforced the benefit of not wearing headphones to seem more approachable. The need for goal-setting was validated as it provided a clear direction for the outing, and positioning himself strategically at the coffee shop maximized social opportunities.

Social Interaction Tally

• Total Approaches: 5
• Numbers Obtained: 0
• Dates Set: 0
• Kisses: 0
• Hookups: 0

Recommendations for Future Outings

1. Continue visualizing success and setting clear, achievable goals for each outing to maintain focus and motivation.
2. Consider slight adjustments in positioning or movement to initiate conversations with those further away when in social settings like the coffee shop.
3. Explore different conversation starters that can be used quickly if someone appears to be in a hurry, to make a memorable impression in a short time.
4. The importance of posture and presence.

Hi guys, just starting to get back into the game after working on my self for a long period of about seven months, practicing music everyday, going to the gym, styling/grooming myself, reading, studying and working.

I want to do 100 sets to improve my game. I was in a toxic relationship from previous and people believe I have mild autism, so this should be fun!

If you don’t believe I should do it because of my austism, please let me know and/or offer alternatives. Thanks!

Was in a 2 year relationship and after doing some self-compassion and self-love work (which continues), getting back into game. My goals are:

• Make new friends (women and men). After the end of my relationship, my social life has thinned out since I was hanging out w/ mostly her friends. Also pandemic.
• Go to multiple dates but still stick to a budget. I like paying for dates and feel really uncomfortable asking the girl to pitch in. But it becomes financially challenging when going on multiple dates with multiple women. So my goal is to manage it better financially and own it.
• I plan to travel in the next several months and want to get my skills back to a level, where I can meet women in any city without having to go to clubs or bars (I dont drink)

I've done more than 100 approaches in the past, but I took a long break and it seems like I'm having a lot of trouble doing it this time.

My goal is to overcome the anxiety and approach 100 girls I find attractive.

While out with a friend he opened 2 girls, after a bit I went into the set… “would you guys ever date someone that’s still friends with their ex?” After a bit of conversation and being able to upload my wings value I rolled off and said “take care of my friend” The other girl immediately asked me for my name, so I used my auto responder for this question, which lead to me using a DHV about where I’m from. I left my friend with the other girl as I sat down with this one… “you seem like a really intuitive girl… lets test that (went into ESP routine). She was blown away by the routine. I laid back and said “you know what I love… people watching, don’t you?” And I went into the “Who hasn’t had any in a while game” When I pointed at her, she got serious and was like… how did you know? I haven’t told anyone this. My read on her… “look at your bracelet, it has all sort of colourful rocks… you’re probably a cat lady (rolled off with a smile). She grabbed my arm and was laughing trying to show me the pictures of her cats.

I went into the looking vs seeing routine, material kept hitting so I went for the kiss close… “this bar is dead, we should go back to my place… but no expectations, I’m just sharing good energy” Back at my place I let her wonder around while I opened the wine, as she kept noticing things I’m working on in my place like journals and my affirmations, she asked me questions that helped me use my DHV about where I’m going in life. We chatted for a bit and then moved the party to the bedroom.

Went out last night with a few friends, started the night by sharing good energy with the staff and engaging with people near me. There was a 5 set of beautiful girls on the dance floor fishing for attention, they kept rejecting guys that wanted to dance with them. When they came by the bar I went in with my opener… “Hey guys, do you think drunk I love you’s count?” (This lead to a 20 minute conversation) I leaned back and said to my target… “I can see it in you… you’re the trouble maker of the group, you’re probably the one buying the shots” … she smiled and said: I’ll buy you a shot.

I sat down with them and introduced a couple of my friends to the group, I raised my friends value by talking about their travels and that helped create conversation among some of them and the other girls. After some conversation with the group I was able to move to another table with the girl I liked… So, which kind of girl are you anyways… tell me something you don’t tell anyone else (she started making some effort to impress me, started talking about what she is doing and her plans) I used the roller thrower folder routine. At this point we have good connection I was able to use one of my DHV stories.

I broke rapport by saying “I’m going to rejoin my friends for a drink, stay out of trouble” When I went back to my friends they were all like… what are you doing? She is so hot and there is many guys going after her, why are you here? lol (they had no idea that’s one of the most powerful moves “not afraid to lose the girl”)

She is back at the dance floor with her friends rejecting guys, the DJ changed the music and she came to get me to dance with her… as she is holding my hand bringing me to the dance floor, I hear some of the guys she rejected going “no fcking way” lol

While dancing she wanted to know how old I was, told her to guess… she said 26, I said, “so, you’re telling me you’d date someone younger than you?” (She told me she was 28 earlier) She went… if it’s you, then yes and put her arms around me… I said “get away from me troublemaker, I’m trying to behave tonight and I’m so close to kissing you” she smiled and kissed me.

Honestly the routine practice is paying off, one of the main reasons I decided to learn game was because I used to ran out of things to say really quick. Now this pieces are just popping in my head as the conversation flows. Happy with the results and wanted to share with you guys.

Will add sets here to keep myself accountable..goal is to talk to 100 new women and increase my dating options. Here goes nothing.

I am going to try and do 100 sets in 30 days starting June 20th ending July 20th. Here is a FR from day one.

Context: I am in a wealthy suburb of the city I live in near the water.

Set 1: Cute girl reading book on bench in park near the water. My two friends encourage me to approach. I walked up and asked what book she is reading. It is a Christian book for her bible study group. We chat for a few minutes and she hooks by asking me what I like to read. Eventually one of her friends walks up and I say hello to him and tell the girl I will add the book to my to-read list. I leave.

Set 2: My friends and I see three cute college age girls in white dresses and college regalias sitting at a table outside Starbucks. I walk up and ask "university of X or X state university?" in a playful manner to see if any of them went to the school I went to or went to our rival. One went to the rival, one went to another uni in my state and one went to a small school in California. We chat for about 8 minutes about their post college plans, what they are up to today, their majors, and shoot the shit for a few minutes. I have the same major as two of them so they hook by asking me how I liked it and what I am doing now. Turns out I work in the same larger company as one of the girl's moms. My friends (two other guys and one is single) are barely joining in on the conversation so I am pretty much talking to three cute 22 year olds alone. After I can tell the convo is dying down and their reservation for dinner is going to be ready I try to close. I say "well hey if you guys are ever in X city we should bar hop or something". One has a bf, one is moving and the other just wasn't down. No biggie. I feel great for approaching 3 girls.

Set 3: In a grocery store. I see a cute girl a few years older than me in coffee aisle looking at different coffee options. I walk up and say "you have any recommendations?" She laughs and says "I was hoping you would have some for me!" We talk for a few minutes about coffee, how she recently moved to the area, where she's from. I number close by saying since she likes coffee we should grab some sometime. She agrees and gives me her number.

​

Not sure if I should count this as 3 or 5. I feel great about it though. Proves that growing some courage and taking to attractive women in real life produces results.

I made a post a few months ago but never ended up doing the sets. Here's a new post to keep track of the sets. I'll post my updates in the comments

Hello everyone!!!

This is my 30 approach follow-up for my goal to have 100 approaches. Below are some notes that I've taken for myself. You can follow my journey here....https://www.reddit.com/r/100sets/comments/pp1osq/im_back/

My definition for an approach is any interaction with an attractive stranger that I either start or maintain. I started this adventure 18 days ago and I've done 30 approaches in that span. If I keep this pace, I'll have 100 approaches by the end of next month or early December. What has made me so productive is having a pretty active social life and living in medium-large city. By active social life I mean I have options to do social activities most days of the week. I'm a swing dancer so I go to at least 1-2 dance events a week and I love being in coffeeshops (to work and whatnot). Most of my approaches come from those situations. I do set aside time to approach during the week but haven't made many approaches in this way.

A couple things I'd like to focus on is make those "walk over" approaches. The one where I have no other reason to be starting the conversation other than to express interest. Those are the one that terrify me the most. Also I've left some pretty good approach without getting any kind of contact information. so I need to go for the number, insta, ect....

I've only been at this for about three weeks so I know that I have a long road ahead for my to feel more competent at this. But I'm excited!!! Feel free to comment.

Hi everyone. Last year I went for 100 sets and stopped after I met the girl would be my next girlfriend. Well the relationship didn't work out and now I'm back to find another woman to be in a relationship with. This time around I won't enter another relationship until I reach the 100 mark.

going to start my 100 sets, trying to get rid of approach anxiety. any motivation is appreciated

Here we go...

Count: 10/100

100 sets till 6 Aug 2022 1 seat done

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I came off a toxic relationship just like a lot of people

I use to do pick up a lot, but I wasn't feeling like the time I put in match the results.

I feel like when I do pick-up it feels silly.

I am also older. Like back when Ross Jefferies was popular

​

Does anybody got tips and suggestions

Going to use this post to keep a public log of my progress in overcoming social anxiety

Happy Monday. Weekly challenges are back. This week’s challenge, if you choose to accept it, is to meet one new person. This person does not need to be someone of romantic interest. It can be anyone. Hell, it can be a dog. Feel free to comment result on this thread. Good luck.

Tip: Make a remark or question about anything that person is wearing or doing.

...Bear in mind that person has the right to respond accordingly.

But I'm only doing single sets because my AA is high. Have started hanging out at street corners and opening strangers passing by with "Nice/Horrible weather today"

What do you guys think of volunteering/picketing as a means of getting past approach anxiety?

To those who are about to achieve the 100 sets goal, how do you think you have changed by looking back on how you were when you were starting? What's the most important lesson you learned?

I know that it's very easy to feel that since covid its hard to meet girls but I want to cheer you up.

First of all, let's be honest for a second, most people did not approach before the pandemic so let's be real.

Second of all, you have been talking to people your whole life, this is not about learning something new, but rather learning to relax and be present. You don't need a strategy, this is not chess, its just talking :)

I gave myself the challenge to meet any of my subscribers who is up for it and help them feel more at ease approaching strangers, women, whoever they want.

Last week end I meet up with Jordan, a subscriber from Miami and I spent a day with him to help him out feel more at ease. I hope you enjoy it and maybe it inspires you. Good luck out there :)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_-YJLn31lVE

Ask why. But ask why with sincerity.

Usually they'll give you a more discernible reason other than the "I have a BF" (sometimes they do, sometimes they don't to spare your feelings) or "I'm just not interested in dating right now" (translation: I'm not interested in dating YOU).

Obviously on the odd occasion, asking why, you'll get a few hard truths that will be uncomfortable. "You're too fat", "you're too old", etc...

However, after this there's really no downside to it because either;

a: you learn what you did wrong and can adapt better next time.

b: it's a hail Mary and she might change her mind when she actually stops and thinks about what made them say no originally.

What's important is that you actually ask with sincerity to know why or what you did or said wrong that made them feel like it would be a no.

Hi member of the 100 sets community.

I've been interested by the "PUA" mentality for a while. Even if I won't call myself a PUA and found that they really weren't in the same mind set as me regarding approach and other stuff. I've finally decided to try and do the challenge, but I don't think I will be able to succeed considering the fact that I've always been the shy and introvert guy without a lot of friends. The thing is that I have tried doing a few cold approaches but I'm not capable most of the time. For example: I need the woman to be alone, without a lot of people around us, ... So I hope that by training I will be able to be better.

And as for the challenge I have a few questions : Do we have to start the interactions with a romantic purpose ? Or if I decide to talk to some elders it also count ? I guess it would be too easy then.

Hey all, I've decided to jump in the challenge ring! 100 sets, here I come! I have been approaching lately but less so because dealing with the mask and social distance hullabaloo can be tough. I will give a breakdown of at least 1 good set that I do (or more depending on how it goes). I also will attempt to get some infield or audio from some of the sets, though I can't guarantee it with no high quality tools. Stay tuned.

For every 5 or 10 mins (depending on your fitness level) of running you get a 60 second break. This break can be extended a further 2 mins as long as you're engaged in conversation with a stranger.

And if you are someone that feels awkward being sweaty around others just make a joke of it; You caught me on a rainy day".

This is a great exercise to break through approach anxiety as you're releasing dopamine, your adrenaline is raised and it helps zero in your focus.

You're also demonstrating that you're someone who exercises and takes care of yourself, or at least trying. And that is more attractive to women than actually being super fit.

​

There's also a plethora of jogging jokes to break the ice with.

"I thought jogging took my breath away. Turns out its you".

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Go on, give it a go.