I work at a startup of 20 people, and I joined very early. As the company grows, my job is becoming less collaborative and less interdisciplinary (as the projects are becoming more structured). When I was hired, company leadership knew that was something I valued. My team lead tells me he can't fix it, and I have an upcoming skip-level with the CTO, and I'd like to bring this up because this issue is very fixable at his level.

I'm trying to leave, but can't find anything else and am compensated very well at my current place. I'd rather find a way for my job to be less isolating - currently I interact with other people for about 30 minutes in my entire week, and work alone the rest of the time.

I know that it is unprofessional to show up to these skip-levels and just... complain. I don't want it to seem like that, but without a birds-eye level view I don't have any solutions to bring. My goal first is to fix this, and if not, my goal is for them not to be surprised when I leave because of this.

Any advice?

As an young woman, I am so tired of the men in the industry. I am interning at an engineering company, which I hope to work for once I graduate. One of my bosses has touched me twice. He grabbed my bicep to “feel how strong” I was. He makes me so uncomfortable. But I won’t report him because unfortunately, he is very high up at one of the larger aerospace companies. I’ve had reporting backfire on me before. Today, one of my older male acquaintances offered me to be a sugar baby for him. I just straight up told him no and that money isn’t everything to me. He literally said, “why not me?!” when I rejected him. Also, why in the world do they think we’d want to be their plus ones for work related events? I’ve had three older men try to get me to be their plus one at our work events and dinners. What shocks me the most is that men don’t actually know who is down for things and who isn’t. I’m a twenty four year old virgin, but they all act like I’m some whore and shoot their shot. My part of the industry is very small and my career is very important to me, so nothing will ever happen. Why can’t we just be left alone to do our work?

I am a junior at a company. I am also a career changer and moved into software dev through a trainee route.

I am with a team where everything is new to me. I don't know how to query databases, I don't know the language, I don't know how to navigate large codebases. Basically, I am extremely inexperienced.

On top of that, I am not a natural developer. I am not a person who picks things up and immediately nderstands how to trace things through code effectively, who is given a task and can complete it end to end. I get to step two and realise I need permissions, or I go down a rabbit hole, or I investigated and our app doesn't seem to have x in the database but I don't know where else to look for it. I waste a lot of my senior's time and I am extremely aware of this.

This does not bode well with said manager who lives and breathes tech. Whose idea of spare time is cool tech projects and geeking out and who has stated several times that career changers are pointless. That we should hire people with degrees in tech as everyone knows career changers are just not good enough.

When I ask him questions, I am often greeted with either I don't understand what you just said, or how do you not know that? The implication whenever we talk is that I am not trying- I am, but he clearly can't see it as he cares about output. And his answers to my questions are often beliggerent and unhelpful.

The problem lies in that fact that its small comments that add up. I am doing an extra hour of learning everyday to try to get those foundations down but I am working for a dev who lives to dev. He heavily implies that I am a waste of company resources and time because I do not have the same natural aptitude that he expects. He wants me to have in the last few months to have progressed faster- to do something once with help and then never need to ask for help again for that specific thing. To effectively ramp up in 2 and a half months.

I am not that type of person and I feel like I should not be in this industry. Especially when faced with him saying things like as a junior I should not be comfortable, and here is a list of all the reasons he would fire someone for not performing at the pace he expects.

I am hitting my targets. I am just not exceeding them. Every ticket contains something new to learn.

What can I do? I am the only woman in my company and I feel very much disheartened by the male testosterone and locker room talk, whilst I sit there invisibly. There's a small part of me that thinks I am blowing it out of proportion but another part of me that feels like he is wanting to deliberately make me feel inferior and small. That because I can't connect with him or don't fit his idea of what a developer is, I should not be there.

I had a final interview earlier this week with a skip-level manager, and here were my takeaways:

• Mentioned being highly involved in daily tasks and clarified that she wanted to know exactly what I was doing—not to “micromanage,” as she put it, but because of her high expectations. When I asked how she balances decision-making as an owner versus seeking SME input, her response leaned heavily toward the owner’s perspective, which raised concerns about workplace boundaries and decision-making dynamics.
• Stated it is a stressful environment and she will use “colorful language” in our interactions once we start working together. To me, this signaled potential challenges with emotional regulation and professionalism.
• She said I might be "window shopping" when asking how the company ranks against others I’m exploring, using dress shopping as an analogy. While I explained my thoughtful and deliberate approach to job applications, the framing felt dismissive and undervaluing, especially since I’d previously worked with the manager I’d report to. I felt like she didnt trust me already.
• Her approach to unmet deadlines focused on pushing overtime rather than seeking proactive solutions, emphasizing that the role isn’t “a 9-5.” When I suggested open communication about deadlines and utilizing team resources, she dismissed it and reiterated the need for overtime. Combined with other feedback, this felt more reactive than constructive. I felt like they overpromise and underdeliver if there is a constant need for overtime.

Afterward, I received an email requesting availability for another round and a test. Due to prior commitments(which I've communicated with them on my availability), I couldn’t respond immediately. When I followed up with an apology and my availability next day, they informed me within an hour that they were moving in a different direction.

Initially, I was disappointed because I’d looked forward to working with my former teammate. However, upon reflection—and after seeing MULTIPLE Glassdoor reviews confirming micromanagement, emotional dysregulation, and high turnover—I feel relieved. This wasn’t the right fit for me. Please check glassdoor before interviewing and wasting time. I usually do, but idk I was too excited by the opportunity to work with a former teammate I just went for it.

I am a mechanical engineering student in my last year of university(in the UK) and as much as I love engineering as a field instances such as these make me want to change my career path altogether. In my three years at university I can’t imagine how many times I have been belittled, ignored and outright harassed mentally by my co-student male peers in group projects. From ignoring what I have to say in meetings? To absolutely bashing me on group chats and denying to give me work. It affects my grade and my overall mental being when I am treated like absolute trash! This is my last year and I can’t get a horrible grade, seeing how it is in university I can’t imagine how worse it might be in the workplace with snobby men who don’t see you as their equal. I would be happy to hear how other women here deal with such and if there is anything I can do to stop this! Before it drives me to change my field altogether.

Currently a junior in undergrad, and I really struggled through the recruitment process last year. I went into this year with low expectations and was going to be happy with pretty much anything, but I ended up getting an offer from one of my top choices, where I’ll be doing something I’ve wanted to do since I was a kid (working on rocket hardware!). I know this is only the beginning, but I feel like I’ve made an important step toward proving to myself that I’m capable of making it in this field. Happy thanksgiving everyone!!

Hi y'all, I know this post may offend some people but genuinely in my experience (2ish years) working with women engineers is always more tricky and toxic.

I keep on running into the same issue with a coworker of mine who is slightly more senior than I am. She is tried many times to throw me under the bus even though she's often guilty of exact same things.

I find working with her very frustrating.

On top of that, she keeps on asking me for personal favors such as rides to work and executing some of her tasks...

My experience with the men in my department has been the quite the opposite. They are always here to help and they stick up for one another.

Rant over.

EDIT: I've had other issues with a female engineer at my previous place of work as well. Mostly ones that fell on the spectrum scope of things (rude, inflexible, attention seeking, arrogant). Hence the "women" post.

I'm currently a freshman studying computer science.

I want to know how bad the biases will be, and if anyone here has worked in quant as a quant researcher/quant dev/swe in trading firms

Also, what advice would you give me to be successful in securing a job in top trading firms/prop shops/hedge funds?

context: will transfer to a top school in CS, black women

Hi all! I posted here last week about how I was struggling to find a job and looking for advice. Thank you to all those who commented on that post, I really appreciate your insights and words of encouragement. Just when I was considering quitting engineering, I received an email this morning with a job offer!!

I am incredibly grateful and excited! However, I have a few hesitations…since this is my first job offer, I’m not sure if the compensation/benefits package is generally good or bad, so I would love to hear your opinions. Here’s the scoop:

• Position is for an entry-level automation systems engineer in MA
• $80k starting salary paid monthly
• no paid overtime, but I’ve heard from current employees that overtime is frequently expected from them anyway, sometimes working 50-60 hours a week
• also not eligible for bonuses until after the first 2 years of employment
• a lot of travel involved as well, sometimes out of state and for weeks at a time. The company covers most travel expenses, but not all
• the job site is too far for me to commute, so I would have to move and am not sure if they offer relocation assistance (wasn’t mentioned in offer letter nor during interviews)
• PTO includes 10 vacation days (increasing by 1 day per year), 10 paid holidays, and unlimited paid time off for sick days and medical appointments
• work is 100% on-site to start, but could work hybrid in the future
• Other benefits include 401k matching (up to 3%), healthcare (dental and vision included) plans ranging from $100-$250 a month, 50% tuition reimbursement for continuing education, 100% reimbursement for anything needed to obtain PE license
• company hires a lot of new grads, so I’d be working with more people my age. There seems to be a decent amount of female engineers as well (2 out of the 4 engineers I met during my interview were women)
• work is project-based, so work-life balance really depends on the project and client you’re working for

My thoughts: Starting salary is higher than I expected, but I’m worried about the work-life balance seeing as there’s no paid overtime, frequent long hours, and low number of vacation days to start. It’s not the dream job, but it seems like a decent place to start for someone like me; there’s lots of opportunities to gain technical skills early on, friendly people, and challenging but fun projects. Also with no other offers and no source of income currently, I’m not sure I can afford to decline… (Edit: I am currently living at home with parents so I don’t pay rent, but I do have student loans)

The company has also only given me 1 week to review and accept or decline their offer, which doesn’t give me much time to consider, especially with Thanksgiving being this week :/

What do you think? Should I accept? Decline? Try to negotiate salary and/or relocation assistance? Ask for more time to consider? What would you do?

Thank you all for the help <3

Attention, STEMinists! IndyINTEGIRLS will be hosting its annual Winter Math Competition on December 14, 2024 from 12 PM to 3 PM EST. This competition will be held virtually through Zoom and in-person for Indiana residents and is open to all woman-identifying and non-binary students in grades 6-12. This includes non-Indiana residents and international students, too! Registration is free for all, and all participants will be eligible to win exclusive raffle prizes. All participants will also receive a free subscription to Taskade Premium and a participation certificate, and top scorers will be eligible to win cash prizes!

If you do not fit the eligibility requirements to compete, please consider forwarding this message to someone who does. We're totally sure they'll appreciate your thoughtful gesture. For more information about this exciting opportunity, please visit our official AoPS announcement post here:

Attention, everyone! Indianapolis INTEGIRLS will be hosting its annual Spring Math Competition on May 19, 2024 from 12 PM to 4 PM EST. This competition will be held virtually through Zoom, and it's open to all woman-identifying and/or non-binary students in grades 6-12 (with exceptions for mathematically gifted elementary school students). Yep, this includes non-Indiana residents and international students, too. Registration is free for all, and all participants will be eligible to win exclusive raffle prizes. For top scorers, there will be cash prizes!
If you do not meet the eligibility requirements to compete, please consider sharing this message with someone who does. We're sure they will appreciate it. For more information on this exciting opportunity, please visit our official AoPS announcement post here: https://artofproblemsolving.com/community/c5h3448073

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My job is split between desk work and hands on. We’re a mix of engineers and technicians, with the techs tending to be more relaxed in clothing. The norm is jeans/khakis sometimes and t-shirts for most folks. I like to be a bit more put together than that but am not a blouse person either.

I don’t want to be too dressy and stick out but also want to be more put together than tshirts. I’ve fallen into a habit of plain colored hoodies or crewnecks now that it’s cold but would like to have more options. It seems from my shopping that I either get tshirts, blouses or button down shirts. Maybe this is more a fashion advice question but I want to look put together while still being able to move when needed.

update: the problem escalated but we sorted it out one on one. No need to go to HR

I am an intern at a construction company. I’ve worked for the company for 6 months but only 3 at this jobsite. The PM has been trying to quit caffeine so he’s been pretty cranky this week. I offered him a pack of Milano cookies and he started reading the label. I told him (wrongfully) that it didn’t have caffeine in it and he yelled loud enough for the office to hear “chocolate has caffeine in it you fucking idiot” two people even told him to tone it down a notch.

I was so embarrassed that I went to my car and called my mom sobbing. I know I should talk to HR but I don’t want to come off as the overly sensitive woman on the jobsite.

I guess now I know that chocolate has caffeine in it.

i just finished my diploma thesis and now i want to publish it if which u guys prefer?

I was recently laid off after 10+ years in my role, and am pretty heartbroken but have been working to move forward as quickly as possible thanks to minimal severance and the need to support my family. I’ve been hearing that at 36 I’m likely going to be hit with significant age discrimination through this process 🤦🏻‍♀️

Making matters a bit tougher, I was previously remote so my kids school situation is such that I need to do pickup at 4:30 a few nights a week, with no real options to extend that.

I’ve just completed in person final round interviews for a position that I think went really well. The position is listed as fully in person, which I’m not excited about, but it’s close to home and the team seemed open to hour/hybrid flexibility for the right fit. The third party recruiter has been yelling at me for asking this and saying I received him? He’s also pushing for a start date of 12/9 on my end, which would mean I’d need to cancel holiday plans and walk away from my severance payment. The actual hiring team seemed to think a early January start date was reasonable and I just got off the phone with this recruiter saying I had to start immediately and take unpaid time off for the holidays if that was important to me.

He’s insisting he calls my references before we hear from the company (tomorrow) on their decision as well, despite my previous bosses being unable to talk this week due to travel.

I’m about ready to remove myself from consideration for this role, but wanted to check in - would you reach out to the hiring team on this? I feel like so much is getting lost in translation and this recruiter has said I shouldn’t be contacting the hiring manager without them, despite said hiring manager encouraging it.

I moved to Australia a few months ago but haven’t been able to find a job anywhere. Lately, I’ve been considering working in aged care to save money and then enrolling in an Advanced Diploma in Engineering course. I only have about two and a half years left on my visa, which is tied to my husband’s. But deep down, I feel so defeated because my dream has always been to work as an engineer and grow in my career. Every morning and night, I find myself crying over this. Do you think I’ll ever make it through and achieve what I’ve been hoping for?

Hi, I hope this isn’t taken the wrong way. If it is I’ll eat the words and be more self aware but I’m just curious. As a woman, I fear working hard in my studies, to only be not taken seriously in engineering, I’m sure many others feel similarly. I’m also a petite person. I have been treated differently and not taken seriously because of my small stature before. Will this also have an effect on being taken seriously, in anyone else’s experience? Or.. what have you noticed does lead you to not be taken seriously? Thank you.

Numerous roles:

https://job-boards.greenhouse.io/wikimedia/jobs/6383322

I am curious as to how you deal with 1) forgetting something important and 2) when someone else forgets something important. Taks, date, meeting, w/e.

In my experience, it seems to be the one thing people are most hesitant about admitting, right next to "I made a mistake."

And yet, it happens.

Personally, I don't forget often. When I do, I do, and I usually just say it. However, it's never met with any kind of understanding. It's usually a "this was so important, and you didn't say anything for so long." To which my thoughts are always (I don't say this): No shit I didn't say anything for weeks because I forgot.

When other people forget, I always just let it slide. I don't run into it often enough from any one person to be upset about it. So, it's more of an, "alright, well let's work on it now." My boss and direct team engineers seem to have a similar take. But even some people on our team respond with "You forgot? The [important whatever] just slipped your mind?" My boss tends to shut that down fairly quickly, even from other departments. Still, that initial sting always lingers for a bit even when it isn't said to me.

Curious about what others experience.

I recently resigned from my job as a civil engineer. I never really liked the position but it was tolerable until I was assigned a new boss. He made going in to work even more miserable and I was starting to hate myself. I should add that this is my second job after graduating - my first job was even worse as it was in construction and I had to deal with extremely unpleasant people and would cry daily at work. I didn't quit that job until I had a another one locked in, but in hindsight I should've left way sooner. Anyway, that's partially why I just quit this current job... I didn't want to wait until I get a new job while my mental health continues to decline.

But the thing is that now I feel like engineering isn't for me. That includes the other disciplines that are somewhat related too - construction, estimating, design - I don't like any of it and I want to do something totally unrelated. The thing is that I don't know what jobs I could do now with my current background without having to go back to school. I think some kind of business role at a company that is totally unrelated to anything engineering would be great. But they all seem to be looking for business degrees. Has anyone ever made a transition like this? Or if anyone has general advice, I'd be interested in hearing it. TIA

I have my literal first interview since I started applying for jobs earlier this summer and it's only an HR screen but I have no idea what to expect or what to ask to make sure I get to an actual technical interview.

I don't have a lot of job experience either other than teaching either as a TA or as a part time tutor, and have worked as a research fellow for something else, but that was short and with a non profit, so I have no experience interviewing with corporate HR.

What should I expect from the call? What might they ask? And what can I ask back? If they ask my salary expectations, I know I shouldn't lowball myself but with my lack of experience, would it be reasonable to state a lower expected salary? What should I avoid saying if I want to increase my chances of getting to the next round and an actual interview?

Sorry it's a ton of questions, but it'd be so so helpful if anyone could answer even one of them. Thank you!

I’m currently looking at doing an MBA in Business analytics from EE (bachelors in EE). What can I expect coming from an engineering background?

I’ve recently (4 months) been given a lot more responsibility at work and overall feel a lot more weight on my shoulders than I used to. I’m not usually an anxious person and historically been able to “rise to the occasion”- in fact, I think I’m doing a good job with my new responsibilities. However every night I lay in bed and I can’t stop thinking about all the little mistakes I made in the day, “stupid” questions I asked, emails that were sent to quickly or too late, etc. As I think through all those things I remember things I need to do tomorrow and I end up making a list… and the cycle continues. How do you guys turn your minds off at the end of the day and not let work consume your brain after hours?

I work in architecture for an engineering firm (2 YOE), but Ive enjoyed being part of this sub because I think we all have similar experiences- hope this is one of those times.

Hey all

Long story short, a couple years ago I was put in contact with a department manager at a company near me to meet a couple people in different positions in the department, and just talk to them about the field (a bit different than what I do now). I was given her contact by another member of the organization who I know from growing up playing sports with his daughter.

Three years have passed, I check their job postings often. I’ve never seen a position open up that I would qualify for. This would be a career transition for me but it’s what I’ve wanted to do since I met with the employees there and learned about their jobs.

Is it inappropriate to email her now, three years later, and reconnect and ask if they may be seeking the position I am looking for? Or even if not if I could just volunteer/shadow there a few days a month to just get something in that field on my resume? I guess it feels weird to me to reach out so long after the fact, and almost like I’m taking advantage of knowing her contact info.

I’d like to hear some thoughts on this or any advice any of you wonderful women have.

Thank you

Hello everyone, 37f here and I'm working on an online bs degree and it's been incredibly hard. But I am excited, in 3 years, I'll finally have a degree! But I'm still nervous if I can do this... It kinda feels like I still don't understand anything, but I'm doing pretty good in the class as it nears its end all things considered!

I had originally went for a degree in Chemistry, even though I really didn't know what I wanted to do but I wanted to be in a field that supposedly makes money (I was raised in a poor household so please don't blame me for that mindset at 18). Unsurprisingly, I ended up hating it and dropping out when I felt the burnout 1 year away from the degree. I wanted to complete it just to have something to my name, but eugh... Analytical Chemistry was my unbeatable dragon and I was mentally too exhausted by that among other massive events happening at that time of my life that I won't mention here.

But, having worked in production for many years, I do find myself always fascinated how things work and why things worked the way they did. I am hopeful that I will officially become a lady engineer like you guys soon and just wanted to say hello and any advise for a scared new student into this field.

I am an aerospace engineering senior attending a networking event (space happy hour) this evening. I have a memorable personality and presence, but still struggle with nerves and with building professional relationships. Does anyone have any last minute tips for me?

update: it went well! someone’s company bought me a drink, i made an impression on somebody working in a different team at my dream company, and i got a lot of connections with people who want to help me out! +7 LinkedIn connections and i was personally invited to the next event :)

i have always had a hard time feeling very close or “part of the group” when it comes to female friends. part of this is think is due to the normal meanness of high school girls/young women but also bc i am a bit nerdy and not super feminine so that alone rules out a lot women in the South where i live. ive always felt comfortable with and connected to most of the female engineers i met in school and life, we just seem to have similar personalities i guess but i cant seem to find any women outside of engineering i connect with.

idk it may totally be me im just kind of hoping someone can relate or give some advice!

Has anyone who interviewed with Lockheed Martin or RTX heard back ? I know the background checks can be lengthy.

My company just hired a new engineer, and I'm really struggling with how to deal with him. It's gotten to the point where my partner doesn't even want to hear about him.

So he's been at the company for a few months now and we didn't have any onboarding procedures, so I made one just for him to explain how the company works and our standards. Since then, it's been constant harassment of the standards, and it's frustrating! He questions everything, which fine, that's normal for engineers, maybe even expected. But instead of inquiring on why we do something, it's always "it's wrong, this is what I know and how it should be done" only for me to explain and show why we do it that way and how his way won't work. He will then still go ahead doing what he wants to do - to the point where he ordered the parts he wanted to use anyways for a project. All of this to find out he has very limited knowledge in our field and I feel he overplayed his experience - but still feels the need to mansplain something every. other. day. to me and other women in the department.

What made me mad enough to write this post is that he asked me to explain why we do our drawings a certain way, and I wrote back a message responding to his question. He then responds "I've been an engineer long enough to know how these drawings work" and then continues to demand of me to make drawings the way he wants them done. I haven't even answered his message because it just makes me angry. Why ask me in the first place?! He then also went around me to my coworker (who works under me) to make the (wrong) changes to the drawing anyway - which I then told him was inappropriate and to follow the chain of command. It's gotten to the point where I just want to say f*** it, do what you want!

Note: I have talked about this with my boss and they have noticed the same problem with other coworkers. Problem is, the new coworker is managed by someone else but works very closely with my team, and that manager doesn't see a problem with him! In the past, his position has managed my team, and I had my first nightmare of him managing me last night. I love my job so much! But I dread any interaction with him. I feel like my goodwill in helping him has run out, and I don’t want it to turn back on me.

Hi everyone, this is my first time posting on this subreddit. I don’t usually ask for advice on this app, but I’ve been feeling pretty lost in my career lately and would love to get some input from other women in engineering

Here’s the situation: I graduated this past May with a bachelor’s degree in general engineering (mechanics focused) and have been struggling to find a job since then. Even with my EIT license and one internship under my belt, I have yet to land a single job offer. I’ve probably applied to at least 200 jobs by now, across all different industries, but only gotten a handful of interviews.

I think my main problem is my lack of experience and technical knowledge; most recruiters are looking for 1-3 years experience, even for “entry-level” jobs, and very specific technical skills that my degree in general engineering didn’t really teach me. I feel I’m unqualified for 90% of the job postings I see, and the 10% of jobs that I do feel qualified for won’t even give me a chance or ultimately decide to go with someone more experienced after the first interview. I don’t know if the job market just really sucks right now, or maybe I’m just not cut out to be an engineer, but I’m starting to feel really hopeless and worried.

Another important thing to mention is that I (probably) have autism and/or ADHD and felt pretty burnt out by the time I graduated. I know engineering is a challenging field to be in, especially as a woman, and I like to be challenged, but I’m worried about burning out again and wonder if maybe I’m better off switching to a less-demanding career, but I don’t know what careers would be good options.

Anyway, I am currently more concerned about just having a source of income, especially with my student loan payments starting this month. I estimate my savings will run out in the next 5-6 months, and I’m not sure I will be able to find a job by then, so I don’t know what to do…

Should I go back to school and get my master’s degree in a specialized engineering field, even if that means putting myself into even more debt and potentially burning out again? Should I get a part-time job working minimum wage until I can find something in engineering? Should I give up on engineering all together and switch careers?

If you’ve read this far, thank you, and any advice or words of encouragement would be much appreciated. Or if you are someone currently going through a similar experience, I would love to hear your thoughts as well, thanks again <3