This was my biggest dose and by far my most profound experience yet, I made this jump from regular 3.5g trips and although I don't feel any need to start upping my dosage I wanted to experience a "heroic dose". During my come up I generally do a dab and listen to some music, after about 45 minutes of shpongle the body high started really hitting and although I was definitely surprised by the intensity I was fine sitting up and using my phone until about an hour in when the nausea hit me

I decided to lay down and wait for it to pass and while I was attempting to ignore the sick feeling the visuals started to hit me. My body was beginning to feel extremely heavy and as I felt myself sink into the bed with a seemingly endless weight the corner of the room I was staring at stopped looking like it was moving around and breathing and began to start looking like what I can only describe as a blurry ai made mess, I stared with intensity trying to make sense of what I was seeing until I was no longer able to conceptualize the space I was in, as I was staring at my surroundings trying to piece together the puzzle before me my arms and legs began to feel foreign to me, in my altered sense of reality my arm was a completely separate sentient being laying next to me and I began to experience what I would call ego death, I had no sense of who I was or what I wanted and I can only really describe my thoughts at the time as emotional and desperate, this feeling became overwhelming so I tried closing my eyes and comforting myself.

The closed eye visuals were unlike anything I had experienced before, even on dmt I've never managed to fully experience an entity and see such vivid colors and patterns (or at least I've never managed to remember so much of it) I'm still in awe of how real the presence around me felt. While I laid there unmoving holding my eyes shut I saw structures that floated around in space with constantly moving and changing patterns, faces I recognized but couldn't remember floated in and out of these endlessly tall shapes. Even in my head I couldn't fully conceptualize who I was or what I looked like but a being that resembled a bear had materialized right in front of me, it was made of lights and had eyes all over its body and I felt as though I was in a space that only this being could access, it held me close and suddenly started tearing me open and ripping me apart while criticizing me for my narcissism. I wasn’t afraid or in pain at all but this experience made me feel like I died and my consciousness had been transferred over to a new me in a new reality.

I didn’t have the mind to check my timer but I would estimate it was maybe 3 hours into my trip now, I was able to decide to open my eyes and the body high felt much more manageable but I didn't dare try to stand up, as I sat down and started to remember more and more I suddenly began to hate everything about myself and every mistake I had ever made felt like the worst thing that had happened in human history, as I wallowed I remembered my experience dying and my mindset changed just as fast as it had hit me. Overwhelming love for the world around me swelled in my chest and I realized how grateful I was for the ability to make choices, the possibilities felt endless. I was so excited to experience the world around me and so hopeful for the future. I felt like I was connected to all of humanity and all of my regret over the mistakes I’ve made in my life were replaced with the desire to do better. This trip was extremely difficult at times but I felt rewarded in the most beautiful way possible for sticking it out and really letting the experience take me. Of course the afterglow eventually wore off and I felt silly for being so out of control of my feelings but this experience will definitely stick with me, I love taking psychedelics recreationally and always will but this trip helped me realize the importance of intent and really showed me the possibility of self growth you can gain from the introspective nature of psychedelics

Least I think it's the end.... LSA.

12min: Overheated and all is a blur. "Stick that needle in my eye, just lost my peace of mind"

13.5min: Tingly still hot and out of it.

17min: Intense stomach pains subside to half strength, I gain some clarity of state.

19min: Stomach pains much lesser, much more clear state of mine. Repeatedly feeling my skin, hair feels crazy. Music is understandable now, wasn't for a bit.

21min: Feel much better, disassociative feeling in limbs, so loose and flowy/free feeling. It's been awhile.

38.5: Numbly/tingly but normal, fun feeling. Listening to tunes and talking.

42.5: "Tearin' it back, unveilin' me

Takin' a step back, so I can breathe" Woah- Sneezing!

50.5: Pepper attack, almost done.

56.5: Attack over, almost better.

1.37.5: It's here

1.54: Heavy tracer and glow and expecially oev-cev afterjpg's. Phantom cig drag.

2.04: Bit of nausea, dizzy, disassociate... drag.

2.11.5: Much better now. Feeling good againnnnn.

2.23: I'm fuuuuuked up like wooooooooughggghh. "Yeahhh the night I was born, swear the moon turned- fire red."

3.13: Mother Nature = Hell with competitive Heaven Intent. Father Saviour = Heaven with competitive Hell Intent.

6.09: Crazy sneeze attack. Can't describe night. I didn't remember this last entry until..... this entry.

I can't answer anything tonight sorry I'm still hmmmm mhmm.

Backstory: I have done shrooms twice before even one time going up to 4gs on my second time. It was nothing compared to this. My friend had some shrooms that he had offered to me because he didn’t want them. I planned on taking them after school but decided it could be fun in school… bad choice😭 I had no idea what an ego death was, until i told my friend about this story.

It started off with me taking 2.5g of strong PE (didn’t know that at the time) but in my third period class around 11 o clock i took all of them. 30 minutes or so passed by and i could definitely feel the come up, I got very nauseous immediately and panic set in. I started seeing patterns and rivers of geometry form in the floors as i sat through english class.

Once the bell finally rang i was through the come up and really started freaking out. Walking through the school with hundreds to thousands of teens walking around me was the most overwhelming thing ever. I found my way into a private washroom (the lockable ones for just one person) and layer on the floor. Immediately throwing up and getting more scared.

As time slowly slowed down i realized that i didn’t know where i was and couldn’t think of my name. I started freaking out and this had never happened before. Patterns and geometry took over my view as i lied on the floor looking up at the ceiling. My schools in an area with a ton of annoying wannabe gangsters so as i was trying to calm down in the washroom they started slamming on the door and yelling in. I thought everyone knew what i was on and was coming for me. I totally thought it was the end and i was going to get caught.

I thought my life would be over. Having a complete ego death in school wasnt what i had imagined from 2.5g (i thought they were regular cubes) I could close my eyes and see myself looking back. Even though i didn’t recognize it, it just felt like me. It felt like all the bad parts of me, addiction, depression, anxiety, I was facing it all at once in my mind laying on the school floor.

I tried to get up but got lost in the school i kept walking one way and it felt like a loop. I went to my locker to grab a coat, i spun my locker and watched as it went back to 0 every time i don’t know how i managed to get it open but it took what felt like forever.

I eventually found my way outside where i went to this calm park with a bench i knew no one would walk by. I sat there and finished the peak all while trying to find my mind. When i was starting to come down i headed back to school to catch my bus. Safe to say this changed my life and i think i wont ever revisit shrooms until im ready to revisit that place of psychosis and fear.

Preface: I got mirtazapine prescribed as an adjunct to 10mg/day escitalopram (Lexapro) to help deal with my anxiety, depression, insomnia, and OCD. I was prescribed a dose of 7.5mg nightly, so I didn't have much. I've always been very fascinated by the more obscure hallucinogens. Seeing as I was broke and out of kratom (I was a heavy kratom user until really recently), I jumped at the chance to burn through almost an entire prescription of a prescribed medication that was meant to help me. Withdrawals often lead me to stupid decisions.

Before I go any further, I think it's really important to point out that we don't know a ton about this drug in overdoses. It's typically regarded as a deliriant, and for good reason, but it's nothing like a 1st generation antihistamine like DPH. It likely exerts some of its hallucinogenic effects through indirect monoamine (dopamine, norepinephrine, and serotonin) activity. Just because it's a 5-HT antagonist and not directly serotonergic does not mean that it's safe to trip on this stuff while on SSRIs, SNRIs, or MAOIs. What I did was dangerous.

Report: My "experiment" began with a 60mg test dose. The main thing I noted was extreme fatigue. It was drowsier than any drug I've ever taken before, even zolpidem (Ambien). I did not feel good, and I ended up falling asleep pretty quickly, with no plans to take more. I ended up having the most awful and disturbingly vivid nightmares of my life, which I'm not even going to try to describe.

I ended up sleeping for around 12 hours and woke up from the 60mg dose feeling very disappointed. I was shaken after having those dark dreams. I knew this was a very stupid idea, but I felt very compelled to take more. I was going to do a big dose this time, and get completely lost in the world of this drug. I decided that with 60mg still in my system, 120mg would be a sufficient dose. With only the slightest bit of hesitation, I took the 120mg of mirtazapine.

I immediately began shaking with a mix of fear and anticipation. I was still in a pretty weird headspace from earlier, but within maybe 20 minutes, I felt it intensify. My house started to look strange, unfamiliar, but in a very familiar way. The mirtazapine produced an unpleasant dissociative effect, nothing like anything I had experienced before with NMDA antagonists like DXM and ketamine. The best comparison I can think of would be nutmeg, but it's still quite different from that. It was a very bizarre feeling, inherently sinister, alien yet viscerally familiar at the same time. It wasn't fun. I was feeling a general sense of unease, so I decided to play Borderlands for a bit, but quickly became too tired. Needing something a bit less demanding, I joined some people in a call. I didn't really feel like talking, so I just kind of sat there awkwardly. I started getting a bit nauseous, and being the emetophobe I am, I panicked a little. I left the call and calmed down, and the nausea quickly subsided.

After leaving the call, I started to get very upset about what I did. I felt like I messed up really bad, like everything was evil. I felt so far away from my baseline state. I began crying a little, feeling very torn up about what I had done. I decided weed would help, and it did a little. After smoking, I still felt contemplative. My imagination was intensified, and again felt very visceral and uncanny. It wasn’t pleasant, and it reminded me of the feeling of “losing it” after taking DXM for too many days in a row. I was still really sad, and I thought a lot about my drug use in general. I had the realization that no amount of drugs could ever heal the pain that would eventually result if I continued using like I do. I attribute this to the combined effect of the mirtazapine and kratom withdrawal.

I ended up falling asleep again, sleeping almost as I did the last time. I woke up still feeling gross. Everything felt a little bit evil, and there was little joy to be found in anything. I still felt those eerie deja vu vibes from the prior night, Eventually, I snapped, and borrowed some money and went to buy more kratom. I had to get it ASAP, so I forced myself to eat some scrambled eggs and toast and hit the road, skating around an 8-mile round trip to the smoke shop and back. I felt like I was running on empty, and on the way back, I felt as if I was going to be sick from all the exertion. Luckily, this didn’t happen, and I made it home safely albeit very worn out and messy looking. I took my kratom started to feel a little better and showered to get all that grime off. My cognition definitely took a major hit, not returning to anywhere near baseline until over 24 hours after the last dose.

I don’t recommend abusing this drug. I understand the allure of its uniqueness, but it was a very unpleasant experience for me. I know kratom withdrawal played into it, but I’ve never had a positive deliriant trip. Novelty is the most these drugs have to offer, and it’s never worth the real price they come with.

Conclusion: It sucked. There were no real visuals other than maybe some mild distortions. My imagination was intensified, but not in a fun way. The only thing I really gained from it was some insight on mirtazapine itself. Before trying this, I was under the impression that the trip was mostly just anticholinergic syndrome with some kappa agonist effects. In reality, it's way more complicated than that, and I think I had a false sense of security going into it, thinking I knew what to expect. I'm never exceeding my prescribed dose again, and I strongly advise against tripping on this stuff.

Hope this wasn't too long or hard to read, and I hope some of you found this interesting/helpful!!

English is not my first language so forgive me and all that... Its been over a decade since the experience described here and i have since tried over 50 different psychoactive substances, yet even after all these years i still remember it as one of my most memorable and intense psychodelic experiences. So lets get to it! I order the compound online and it arrives in capsules each containing 4mg of 2cp Having experienced shrooms (they grow in the wild around here), 4-ho-met and dxm before i want the trip to be wild and so i ingest 4. Im home alone so nothing will be distracting me from the experience. 2cp taken orally takes really long to kick in, like 3 or 4 hours long so i try to chill and pass the time playing Mafia 2 on my computer. 2 hours in i start to experience immense cold, its so cold that i go to the heater and curl up there as i'm shaking uncontrolably. Its pointless endevour as no matter how close i am to the heater i cant seem to be able to warm myself up. So i lay on my bed waiting for magic to start. After what feels like eternity i start to feel lightheaded so eager to start the trip i get up and go out of my room into the corridor, at the walls near the staircase leading downstairs i see shifting geometric black and white patterns (my walls are normally painted yellow), it looks like one of those optical illusions found on the internet. Pumped to see more i venture into the adjacent room expecting to see more visuals on the colorful carpet lain there but it looks normal. Disappointed i go back to my room and decide to put some music on. But as i close the door behind me i suddenly find myself on an alien desert/badlands/wasteland like planet and somehow im hundred percent certain that its sun is gonna blow up destroying the planet and killing me in the process. I'm thinking to myself (being completely immersed in the hallucination) is that it, am i going to just perish somewhere far away from home? But the thought of death doesn't seem scary to me at all, i accept my fate and incoming nonexistance. Than all of a sudden im back in my own room, in my own headspace, slight dissiness being what's left of my otherworldly journey, thinking 'yay that was nice' and decided to see what music is like on 2cp. I choose some monstercat techno mix and put it on repeat. The music sounds to me like a catfight and all but one song in the mix is making me really anxious for no apparent reason. At this point i no konger seem to think clearly as instead of choosing different mix or just shutting down the music player i rewind the entire mix to this one short song like dozen of times without realising just what exactly is that im doing. Than i snap out of it for a moment because i feel my mouth is dry and this thought that i need to hydrate myself pops into my head and pierces though the mindfuck and for some reason i know i have to go downstairs to pick a bottle (in reality a fresh bottle of water is just under my bed as i always place it there to drink regularly when i take something). I try to sync my journey downstairs with the beginning of this one calming song from the mix that's blasting thought my speakers, to have enough time to go down and up again, before the anxiety induced by the other songs kicks in. When im in the middle of the stairs i have this sudden realisation, almost an epiphany, that i already drank water and i dont need to go pick it up, and so i return to my room before the song ends to rewind it again but than im thinking to myself again 'wait a moment i didn't drink any water, but there's some bottled water downstairs, lets go pick it up' and so i go downstairs again... It went for an hour or so. It was like a memory reset, like every time i went downstairs to drink some water and going back in the middle of stairs i thought that i was doing it for the first time when in reality i was repeating the same motion and thought process over and over with no recollection of how many times ive done that before. Than after what felt to me like a couple of minutes but was on reality something like 1.5 hour or so i thought to myself 'wait how many times i tried to drink that water, am i in psychedelic loop? Yeah, damn thing just erases my memory and makes me do the exact same thing over and over again! I need help' and so i went to my computer and on to the tripsit and told them that i'm in a loop on heavy dose of 2cp and asked if they have any advice', but because of the immense mindfuck and the 'need' to rewind my mix to this one song coupled with the need to go downstairs for the bottle of water again i couldn't really comprehend what they were saying. And instead of breaking free of the loop, the process of asking for assistance on tripsit became part of it. This went on for like 3 more hours. I was rewinding the mix, going downstairs for the water, in the middle of the stairs realising that i already drank water (i drank none) and that i'm in the psychedelic loop, going up again, asking on tripsit for help, losing my memory and doing the same thing again. And than all of a sudden i find myself in my own bed, my recollection of how i ended up in there and broke free of the loop is foggy at best but i'm in for a ride. Somehow as with the sand planet, i just know that the East is ruled by an entity called, in translation from my mother tongue a Allwhorish Motherrussia who breeds hordes of bloodthirsty savages and releases them from her cunt to swarm the West. Im some figure that plays a part in a fight against her and i lay covered by animal pelts in a wooden cabin somewhere in Syberia. Some boyars approach me to give me gifts one of wich is a hellish hound bred to fight and kill, and this hellish hound is my dog who starts licking me on my face, than for a moment i feel sober again but the only thing im able to think before being sucked into delirium again is 'wow'. Than the cabin disappears and i find myself in a first world war trench! Im disembodied camera filming waves of soldiers rushing out of the trench to be slaughtered on the battlefield, i think of the pain and misery that they're experiencing but having no body and no tongue im unable to stop them from dying a pointless death in the mud, than everything transforms into this huge underground cavern filled with some weird people in top hats and antiquated clothing from the 19th century, ferris wheel, slides and swings and everything has that diabolic feel to it thats hard to put into words and as before i somehow know that i ventured into Paris commune. Than im being teleported (?) straight into postapocalyptic city with ruined buildings supposedly from an atomic blast but i'm not sure, what im certain of is that i'm now in Ukraine and that this rubble is being scavenged by 'shells-o-men' called strycholki who search for things lost to time. I saw one of them, he was wearing many layers of dirty brown rags or a trenchocoat i'm not sure and didn't look human at all. And than in a blink of an eye im on my bed again but this time im wearing a military uniform together with an assault rifle thats on my left side. I can see it clearly as its real and like a watermark(?) a half-opaque vision of some dirt road in the woods forms within my sight and i now know that im a polish soldier on a mission but what mission and where and wait a moment where's ammo for my assault rifle?! In this mindfucked state of mind i think to myself that my mission was a set up to test military chemicals on me and i may not survive the ordeal. I shout that's not the way to treat a soldier, that the polish government has no honour! I get up from the bed and not realising that i'm in my own room, stumble to the bathroom where hallucination kicks in again as i dont see my walls and tiles but a demolished room somewhere in a war torn country, one of the walls is missing and i can see right through; its some ruined city but i have no clue where or how did i get there, i know i need to take a leak so i piss to this old, dirty and rusty bowl that's in the corner of the room (in reality i pissed into my tub). I go back to my room (that still looks just like my room but my mind somehow fails to register it and i still think that i'm a soldier involuntarily made a test subject for the military chemicals). I go to my computer and hop to a Messenger to tell anyone who will listen that Polish military is a fraud and 'fuck the polish military!!!', it takes me close to an hour to slowly get to my senses and i feel slightly embarrassed to say the least lol. So the trip is over. Its been 10 years since and i still smile when i think of it. I have taken 2cp couple of times more but nothing came close to this first time that i just finished describing.

So it was earlier in the day, before my initial breakthrough on DMT. I tried it out of a vape to “test the waters” and see how I would like it. It felt a lot like a high dose of psilocybin mushrooms and it was very relaxing. I imagined what it would be like to break through on DMT. A DMT breakthrough is an earth shattering experience, it feels like a memory some say. It will make you question your reality in everyday life: and that’s exactly what happened later in the day when I tried it.

I was sitting in my car, a few hours after trying a threshold dose, and I was about to vaporize a good amount of DMT, around 30 mlg (15-25 mlg is a full experience and possibly even a break through). I was told to put it all into my dab rig and cold start it by a friend that had done it before, so that’s what I did. After the first hit I realized the small yellow crystals were still smoking, so I hit the rig again to get it all. I held it in, then exhaled. After that I was immediately tripping and being thrown into a purgatory of deja vu.

My first thought was, “Oh wow I just broke my brain and I'm not supposed to see this.” I saw red digital lights that were also coding that formed into a demonic jester face. I was in complete shell shock. Looking back on this I don't think it actually had ill intentions.

I heard a voice say, “You have died like this many times before, let me show you.” The visuals I was having were really intense, so I closed my eyes for about 15 seconds. That also was really intense, there was a loud digital like ringing in my ear, then I got out of the car. For a very very small moment there was silence but it felt like an eternity. I lay on the grass and could feel every single blade of grass and grain of dirt. My hands felt like wet sand paper. I felt like I had no control of my arms, and like I was melting into everything.

All of a sudden the cops showed up and brought me to jail and I was still tripping in jail, then I was back to the beginning of the trip and taking the hits all over again and seeing the same things. Laid on the grass then the neighbors called 911 to get me an ambulance and I was tripping forever in this alternate life, a psychosis nightmare if you will.

Then I was back to taking the hits out of the rig again and I was going through the same motions. Same geometry, same everything, this was now reality starting to coincide with the DMT realm.

I asked my friend how long it had been, “2.5 minutes”

I said “Wow this is really really intense, did the cops actually show up, did the ambulance show up, what happened? Where am I? What's going on? Who are you? Who am I?” I was in the full pits of ego death at this point. I tried to get into the car and I felt like I got in at least 10 times, really only once.

I sat and looked at my steering wheel and it was in the weirdest shape, it's kind of like a figure eight but not. And the numbers on the speedometer were digital and beautiful, the steering wheel was beautiful, I was, my friend was, everything about life was beautiful. I almost started crying. I was also really scared because I wasn't able to let go all the way and let the experience take me where it wants to go. My friend gave me a hug and started a timer. The timer started 3 minutes late or so.

So time was going by and I was being asked by my friend “What does your time perception feel like?”

I sat in silence for what felt like years before I answered. “It honestly feels like multiple lifetimes in one second.”

I saw some sort of entity, a god-like entity, so I went out to go and see it closer and it was gone. I looked up at the stars and I waved my hands and was painting the stars onto the sky. There were so many colors and shapes that I've never seen before in this experience.

It was about 10 minutes full time at this point. I was starting to come down but really really slow. I was genuinely confused about where I was and who I was but I didn't feel the need to ask for my name because it felt good to just exist. Around 20 minutes in I started to get a little worried, because it should only last 10-15 minutes, I was slowly coming back and it felt like I was in a marathon. When I came out of it completely I was so tired and exhausted. I saw a lot of things that both scared me and gave me comfort.

Last week I smoked a joint for the first time. I was a total newbie lol. I shared a joint with my friend and I took 3 deep hits. 30 seconds after that I felt like the world was dissolving, and I was shaking like never before.

When I was trying to walk I felt motionless, I knew I was walking but it felt like my muscles didn't move at all. I couldn't form a complete sentence. And then I started shaking like hell. I thought I had a seizure but I kept reassuring myself that it was only the effect of the weed and it would go away. My friend talked to me but it sounded like the Sims language to me lol. I was trying my hardest to say something and I was so stressed about saying stupid stuff.

My mouth was dry and sticky as fuck and I tried to drink water but I couldn't swallow. And here came the munch. My friend offered me some snacks and said it could help with my shaking. At this point I still couldn't swallow, and I just kept repeating the robotic movement of putting food in my mouth. The crackers tasted different, in a good way. I felt disgusted by the stickiness in my mouth but I couldn't stop eating because it tasted so good.

The air felt freezing and I was still shaking and I felt like a vibrating dildo... I kept asking my friends to turn up the heating in the car. I felt bad for them bc I knew the car was already hot and they must be sweating balls at this point. We stopped by my friend's house and I tried to compliment her house, but I had no idea if I said the right thing cuz I felt random things slipping out of my mouth. When I got home I was still stoned af but luckily I avoided interacting with anyone in my house.

I wouldn't say it was a good experience cuz greening out ain't fun, but I still enjoyed most of it because it was the first time that I understood when you are high you see things differently. I had zero idea that 3 puffs would get me completely fucked lol. I guess you really gotta start slow. I'm really glad that I did it with my reliable friends. They were experienced smokers so they knew how to handle the situation. They kept telling me things was okay and that really helped to calm me down. I'm so glad that they only told me I greened out AFTER I sobered up, otherwise I would've been more panicked.

Sorry for bad English

Taking a UNKNOWN amount of Weed my first time| Green Out.

I’ve been smoking weed daily for over a year now, I dabble with some DXM and DPH but nothing more than a slight buzz after a long day, I don’t see myself doing anything more than this because of my first ever time doing weed.

I was 16 and turning 17 over the weekend, my buddy said he was having a smaller party at his house and said I could celebrate my birthday during then, I agreed and planned it out to head over to his house after I got out of work.

Before I went, I picked up my girlfriend and we stopped by my house to get some snacks and soda for the night. We arrive at my friends house and go in, inside there is a few people. My buddy J was getting food ready and cleaning the others were chatting/drinking , me and my girlfriend sit down on the couch and just start hanging out with everyone.

Music was bumping and Wreckfest was on the PS4, so of course being me I asked if I could play and did a couple races, during that time although, I was told by J that homemade Peanut Butter brownies are going to be made, and that they will be mixed with Cannabis as that was going someone got a Pre-Roll out and a rotation was started.

Now, mind you I never have smoked before this and this is about 1-2 hours into this “Party” and my GF was complaining about it getting late and her wanting to go home, so instead of staying for the blunt rotation I ended up taking her home.

By the time I got back to Js house, the brownies were about done and everyone was quite drunk. We played a little more Wreckfest until someone finally told us the brownies were done, we all go into the kitchen and there is this baking sheet, I’m talking your normal 17” tray filled with the best smelling brownies EVER. Everyone took a normal brownie sized bit and ate it, even tho everyone took a piece there was still more than 70% of that tray FILLED, and since I had to take my girlfriend home I missed out on the Blunt so I thought “what the hell” and ate a bigger piece than anyone else did, my buddy J looked at me a little weird but I shrugged it off. In about 15 minutes I’m pretty giggly but still mentally there… or so I thought.

By around 20-25 minutes in I apparently went back and ate 3 more brownies, BIG brownies, my friends didn’t stop me because they thought it was funny. The tray was nearly empty and I really didn’t think much was gonna happen, so I just sat on the floor near the couch, whip out my phone and play Piano Tiles.

“Wow, even me eating that brownie I can STILL play this game” I’m thinking to myself, at this point it hasn’t registered I ate more.

In a matter of 30 seconds after that I had a feeling, like I just spawned back into the game, like I wasn’t there for a second and now I’m back and I say “what the hell?” And BLINK and now I’m on the couch, as I’m trying to make out what the fuck is happening I see J playing Wreckfest while my mind is melting, I was so confused by how he was playing it I asked-

“What’s the point of this game you can’t race the same car over and over” I was trying to say that he was playing the same race over and over but he was just making laps, he tells me to relax but I can’t listen to the rest of his sentence since I wake up on the floor.

My face at this point feels like it was on fire, and I remember kinda coming back to my senses to realize I’m ON the floor, I try to move but I can’t, so I end up going on my back and seeing the TV is on and my friends are on the couch, I try to speak but it’s very very hard and my legs DO not work, as I’m trying to talk to my friends they can’t understand me, so I end up trying to call my girlfriend, as I try putting in my passcode to my phone it’s swirling and completely gray (I didn’t have a passcode on my phone) but I some how managed to open Snapchat, while in this moment I saw my 2 friends on the couch and in my head I immediately saw it. “YOU GUYS LOOK LIKE AN ALBUM COVER” I somehow manage to say, as that happens I take a picture of them and start to try and edit it , (if you are wondering what the images is, I’ll add it to the post)

I finally manage to call my Girlfriend, my gibberish and inability to talk is apparent and I end up passing out again with her on the phone, she also ended up hanging up.

I don’t know much time passed between this and that, but the next thing I remember is waking up to see the ceiling. The house I’m in used those ceiling tiles that schools have, some of the rectangle boards had art on them and lo and behold the one I’m directly under is the craziest one. It’s NORMALLY just multicolor planets and space, but instead I first saw sperm, hundreds of sperm flying through a void, As I blinked it changed to palm trees flying through space, exploding, hitting planets , pure chaos. I tried explaining to my friends that what I’m seeing is absolutely insane and just so much going on.
I ended up back onto the couch this time laying down, my face still being completely on fire and me trying to get someone to help, one of my friends got a bag of frozen Peas and let me put it on my face, the moments of clarity let me lock in for a moment when I felt the cool packaging, just for it to leave and for the Brownies to haunt me and my mind.

I remember thinking “dude cmon, you are embarrassing yourself and will NEVER be invited again” and other things like “IMAGINE YOU ARE KRATOS PUSH THROUGH” lots of things that my mind was trying to do SOMETHING to not let me completely shut down. By this time the I’m thinking the effects are 1000%. My arms and legs are twitching and moving like crazy and I’ve been crying and coughing for over an hour now, it couldn’t possibly get worse? my body was is in completely uncontrollable state, my mind racing at a billions of thoughts a second, as then, it hits fully.

Imagine this with me, Picture glass, we all know that glass can be sharp, VERY sharp, and usually the ends of glass are the sharpest. Take that feeling picture it in a 360 degree sphere.

In my mind and how my body felt is that my hands were gliding around a constant sharp glass ball and I couldn’t stop, my body was in full delusion and I was sure I was going to die on that couch.

In the mist of ALL of that, somehow one of my friends called my girlfriend and she was so worried she actually drove back out to my buddies House, she came in and actually took care of me, I got a blanket and water and she was actually helping me chill out a little, I could still FEEL the glass sphere and the pain, but her there made it easier, I don’t really remember much since now I was actually sleeping, the last thing I remember before completely passin out was sitting up on the couch, asking for the trash can, someone bringing it to me and puking ONCE only once, which is honestly crazy because I have thrown up MORE taking less than that time.

For the next week after I wasn’t able to drive because I would just nod off bc I was still feeling it even while being fully awake and not taking any more.

I’m still not sure how much I did exactly take, my buddy said it was the most “quality” weed we coulda got at the time, I’m not just sure if I took only weed or if there was something more, but what I can tell you is nothing has ever gotten that close, I can do 6 blinkers in a row and not even BEGIN to feel how I did that night.

Oh and if you wanna see the “album cover” photo, check on my profile, should be the other post 👍

Anyways well, this was my basic “Green Out” story, not crazy crazy like some are but the effects I had that night/week is what keeps me from going any crazier with drugs.

hello everyone i am currently preparing for my first solo trip next friday. i have some experience with shrooms, but it's been a few years. however, i have never traveled alone before. my plan is to take a low/medium dose and work on my problems in my life.

how do you go about it? i thought i'd make a list of what i want to change: for example, stop smoking, drink less alcohol, forgive myself more and so on.

is this enough and then read it out loud on the trip, or do i write a few thoughts about it or just see what comes to me?

i'm looking forward to a great journey to myself, as i was always distracted by my trip partners on previous trips. sure, that was fun too, but now i want to take a journey to my inner self and gain insights that will help me grow.

thank you very much for your tips, i look forward to reading them.

I would consider myself a very experienced psychonaut & drug user in general. I have indulged in substances such as meth, heroin, crack etc however my favourite things to consume would have to be psychedelics & disassociatives. Throughout the past few years, I have been getting braver with the doses of things I have consumed. I have had mind-boggling experiences on 2000ug of LSD & other crazy psychedelic combinations. For the last year or so, I have been suffering with a chronic ketamine addiction, doing up to 7 grams daily for months on end which had started to impact my daily life a fair bit. I recently managed to acquire a DMT vape pen and 12 2cbs. I knew I had to make the most of this experience and get a bag of ket.

On the day of the trip, my mum and dad were at work and wouldnt be back until quite late, so I woke up early and prepared to get lost in the psychedelic world. I consumed two 20mg 2cbs at 10am and patiently waited for the effects to take place, as I listened to some Tame Impala and relaxed in bed. After around 50 minutes, I could feel it kicking in. My veins began to tingle & I was experiencing some moderate discomfort in my stomach. For those who have not done 2CB, it is very similar to LSD however, it feels considerably more synthetic. I would compare it more to NBOME in a visual & physical feeling sense. Around 30 minutes later, I was overwhelmed with amazing visuals and a rather intense headspace. This was weird, since 2CB doesnt really give me mentally challenging trips, more just visually strong. As the trip went on I could feel everything. I felt connected to the world and a strong sense of euphoria came over me. For once in my life, I felt connected to myself, I didn’t hate myself & I could appreciate life more than I ever do on a day to day basis. I started laughing at the most random things, giggling away uncontrollably at something I wouldn’t of even raised a smirk at whilst sober. At this point, I was starting to get abit too big for my boots. I thought fuck it, lets rail two fat lines of ketamine. I took out my little bag and poured half of it onto the back of my phone. Between both lines, there must of been 350-400mg. I hoovered both of these up quickly & drank my mountain dew to get rid of the drip back.

As I waited for the ketamine to kick in, I couldn’t help but notice how connected I was to the music. I could feel every sound & every instrument shatter through my skin in a very peaceful way. I was listening to ‘Hippies’ by Flipturn at this point and it felt beyond beautiful to be able to appreciate music at a level like this. Now it’s hard to remember when exactly the ket kicked in but as I stood up I could feel that orgasmic disassociation flood through my body. It was incredibly difficult to walk at this point & I almost fell over three or four times whilst searching for the TV remote. My mind was wandering to places I didn’t know was possible. I started to question everything about our reality & began talking to myself in a language that didn’t even exist. None of what I was saying made any rational sense but to me, in that moment it all made sense. I felt I was on the brink of a K-Hole now and I was becoming paralysed in my bedsheets (almost sinking through the mattress).

Now, every-time I manage to get this fucked up, I am never satisfied, no matter how intense the trip is. I just had to go further, it wasn’t enough for me to still be somewhat in this reality. I wanted to travel to a place I’d never been before. Without even hesitating, I rummaged around in my draw for my DMT vape. This felt like it took 2 hours but in reality it was less than 5 minutes. I slowly manoeuvred back into my bed, closed my eyes and inhaled the DMT, held it in my lungs and slowly breathed out. I took 6 total puffs, since it takes more to breakthrough than it would with freebase powder. Instantly I was transported out of my room into the most insane geometric patterns & fractals that blinded my vision. I was forced into shutting my eyes & as I blasted off I felt a big wave of regret hit me. It was too late to go back now & I knew i was in for a bumpy ride. My body felt as if I was being thrown down a rollercoaster at maximum speed then jolting to an abrupt stop. The closed eye visuals I was experiencing were out of this world, I couldn’t even begin to comprehend what was happening. As I was in complete awe of what was in front of me, I felt like this was just the start. I was in a sort of DMT waiting room ready to be plunged into the depths of the universe. Once again, the rollercoaster feeling took full effect and I was launched into the eye of the dimitri. The complexity of the shapes that surrounded me were indescribable and I could feel the presence of some sort of entity judging and watching my every move and thought. I had absolutely no control over anything & I was paralysed in fear in this new found dimension. Starting into my soul, was a glaring psychedelic eye which was surrounded my purple triangles & other things I cant begin to explain. This next part has stuck with me ever since the trip. As I looked up, completely shellshocked. The eye began communicating with me telepathically. I couldn’t hear a physical voice but I know for a fact it was speaking directly to me. It sort of mocked me in a way. It laughed & said ‘You think you’re ready for this, I am the Eye of Dimitri & your human presence is something i’ve been expecting’. At this point, I genuinely believed I was already dead and I would spend the rest of eternity in this multidimensional universe guarded by psychedelic entities. It started to show me things that were out of this world. I could feel my body being worked on like I was some sort of project & these robotic looking elves were tweaking & editing things inside my organs. I figured these were the famous machine elves and at this point I realised they controlled our bodies. They reassured me they were helping me & fixing my insides and the weirdest part is I could genuinely feel all this taking place. I started to have this thought that ‘nothing was everything and everything was nothing’. Even though I was scared out of my skin, I felt enlightened and appreciated and respected the universe so much more.

As i was coming back to reality and leaving the DMT world, I could feel their spirits still inside of my soul and I thanked them for everything they had shown me. I promised to never take anything for granted & to be a better person. The rest of the experience is rather foggy & not very entertaining however after this had all took place, I genuinely felt so much better in my body physically and mentally. I had been suffering from some quite uncomfortable stomach problems for a long time before this trip and once i was back in the real world my stomach issues had seemingly vanished & I couldn’t help but wonder if this was down to the machine elves. I really do believe this really happened and there are millions of other universes out there. I can never truly know the truth about it all but I am confident in saying never underestimate DMT & I genuinely think these entities exist and must be respected above anything.

Thank you for reading.

Hello Friends,

I wanted to share my experience and how I am feeling to hopefully get insights and advice.

Summarize:

I took my first dose in 20+ years. When I was younger I would have a gram max and never had intense visuals or a huge trip. I stopped after a bad trip due to a friend who was supposed to take them with me and backed out and I had to go home alone to my parents house etc....

That being said, I wanted to try them again as an adult (38 years of age) for more of an experience into the realm of learning more about myself, universe and be more connected.

My experience:

I took 2.2 grams of Golden teachers on an empty stomach, solo at my house. The goal was to wear an eye mask and music and go inward but the visuals were so amazing with my eyes open, I couldn't bring myself to put on the blindfold. Crazy Aztek-like patterns on my hands, walls, lantern..... ceiling was all sorts of patterns... just amazing and I really enjoyed it... wish it lasted longer as it faded after 3 hours. INCREDIBLE

So first time was amazing and I am excited to go back and wish it was something I could do more often as I felt great during but i know you have to give a week or two for receptors etc.... (not wanting to abuse it but I just feel there is so much to experience and I kept feeling like I was running out of time and there was so much to see and do right from my couch)

Lack of Insights:

I didn't find I received any learnings, teachings and it was more just a visual journey that I am still trying to piece together and remember. I've meditated, journaled and reflected but so far just excited to get back to it and nothing truly gained other than it's something I want to venture further into.

Afterglow:

I didn't experience this.... The next day (yesterday), I felt very very down and out. I wish I could just take my micro dose I was doing prior but I am taking a break as mentioned for receptors. I took yesterday off work as felt very down. I meditated and did breath work and journaled but felt down and out and watched a movie with my wife and went to bed.

Today:

Today I feel better, a lot better but not 100%.

Not sure why the afterglow didn't happen and I was hoping I would feel good for a few days to get back to my micro dose schedule.

Any Advice?

When could I trip again if I wanted to go inward with eye mask.

When could I start back my micro dose schedule?

Thanks everyone!

Hello everyone

I have taken many shrooms trips, from 10gplus and beyond but the stomach pain is just so crazy painful. Now I know its fungus i know we technically poison our selves but am sure there is someway somehow a solution to not experience the stomach pain during a trip.

I have done it all, from lemon tek , griding it, to taken tums after, whatever measures you think of i have done it. its just not worth the pain anymore, don't get me wrong i love shrooms and i have some crazy shrooms trips stories to tell you about to where i was even speaking different languages and dealing with other entities during my astral tips but the love of it is really fading away due to this factor.

today i took 6g on golden teacher lemontk, with ginger, peppermint tea, and also i strain it through regular strainer and a paper filter, the trip is just dealing with stomach pain that is it the mind want to go somewhere but the extreme stomach pain wont let it.

Any tips that you guys know of or have that would help i truly would appreciate

My last trip was about 2 weeks ago did 7 to 8g on white rabbit that was a wild trip but also dealt with extreme stomach pain . side note this is my first time trying and last time will do golden teacher as personally didn't like it at all i rather have stronger strains to go on a trip on. will micro dos golden teacher but not to trip on . even the visual wasn't all that on it . but regardless the stomach pain is just messedup to deal with any help i would really appreciate.

now after all my complaining about it will most likely get back to stronger strain but this time will give my self a break like a month or so. after today will go 10gplus on jackfrost next . if you guys want a report on that let me know will comeback then and tell you guys

Since i’m german i can write better in german so i translated it by google.

First of all I would like to make it clear that LSD on the black market has approximately 100ug per tab. Probably even less. I took 2 tabs x 150ug, which was 100% clean because tested. So let's assume a trip of 4-5 tabs.

History: This was my second trip. The first one was about 200ug. There were 3 other people there, 2 good friends and my girlfriend. All 3 were on a high dose of 2cb.

9:00 - Start, I take a full tab straight away. I'll chill out a bit first.

9:30 - Friends come, I take the second tab straight after the first one was no longer there. They eventually dissolve in your mouth.

10:00 - I take a shower and listen to raggae music. The first visuals come, I dance and my body feels very good under the rainy water and my skin somehow thanks me. I cleaned the entire shower, sprayed all 4 walls down to the last hair or stain. My vision is already starting to get worse. I can no longer see the ground clearly, everything is very blurry. The glass and the base create thin patterns. Very nice.

10:15 - I get out of the shower. It took me a long time to dry off because I kept being interrupted by the beautiful music. There was so much happiness in me.

10:30 - I sit down in my room with my friends, we build a joint, the grass looked like something out of a video game, so clear green and with patterns, it also moved a little, but more on that later.

11:00 - We smoke the joint.

11:15-15:00 peak phase. I lost complete connection to reality, I basically had one memory per person. I'll try to describe this as best as I can, if anyone has experienced something similar, please tell me. For each person I knew, i.e. with whom I already have a bond and memory, I saw individual situations, which is why it was very difficult for me to be in a room with three people at the same time in the peak phase. For example, when I was smoking with a friend, just the two of us in the room, I saw what a people pleaser he was. In my head he consistently said what I wanted to hear. I don't even think he actually said that. I heard and saw things that weren't real. I also answered things, but sometimes he didn't respond and kept asking the same question. There had been no progress in responding, I could just listen without interacting. That happened with the other people too, just with other positive or negative things, all individual to the person, completely independent of each other. My girlfriend had to talk to me regularly to get me back, I also had a moment where I was completely empty for 10 seconds, no more voices, white everywhere, I couldn't see anything anymore. It wasn't possible to close my eyes either because I was completely gone and heard some situations that weren't there. I didn't just have loops in my head. I saw and felt loops. For example, how I always changed rooms, always opened the door and there was always a different reality behind the door. The whole thing lasted almost 4 hours and at one point it was extremely overwhelming for me, and I was happy when it stopped. I would like to describe it better, but since I wasn't actually there myself I can't do it better.

3:00 p.m. to sleep time After Peak - Just visuals, no more loops, no loss of reality. I started using joints again, so it kept getting stronger, which was pretty cool. Not strong enough to peak again but I was still tripping hard. I went for a walk 3 times with a friend and the nature and trees were so fucking beautiful. I'm not lying when I say that I saw the trees breathing, I went close to a tree and I saw several breathing points spread all over the trees, I stood and just looked. Everything looked like a picture. Beautiful. I was briefly in the supermarket once and all the noises were louder and more intense. I saw patterns everywhere on the chip plastic. But I quickly went out again because it was a lot. After that I just had visuals until I went to sleep. I consistently saw eyes everywhere. Everyone can say for themselves what that means. It was a wonderful, emotional trip. LSD helped me to find the lightness of life and to realize that I alone can decide how I feel and what I do. I live in a free country, have a free memory. LSD, even my first trip, helped me a lot with my depression and will always be a part of me. I'll probably trip once every year or so, always for spiritual reasons and just self-improvement.

Thanks.

Last year I posted 2 trip reports. A few months ago I wanted to review them and Reddit said either they or this sub was blocked (can't remember which one).

It got me and a my friend sitter fed up and we created our own trip report website (Tripsagas). But now it seems like the whole blocking thing never happened.

Anyone have more intel on this, or was this one too many trips?

“This experience happened in October 2020 and still has an impact on my life. It is the most significant event in my life to date.”

https://youtu.be/Tdy_i96Rkr8?si=7gACb723JJv7-Ns3

This is my first trip report I feel corny writing this but, this trip starts off in the month of January I’m not sure what day but in January forsure. The day started off pretty good I had a good setting and set (dose was 5-7 grams i don’t really remember) nd I was going to trip locally at my park at 2pm with homie B, but the other homies had the smart idea to go to Venice THE DAY OF me and the homie “B” tripping at the park, Even tho the plan was to go the day AFTER. So we saved the shrooms and hopped in the car. Everyone wanted to take the shrooms in the car but I don’t do good in small spaces, sooo I wasn’t agreeing to that idea, we saved them until we made it to Venice beach. it was like 9pm by the time we got there and we STILL ended up taking them. I’m not sure if anyones been to Venice but there’s a lot of alley ways especially near the restaurants and shit so we parked up right there, we were relatively close to the skatepark.

Once we actually got out the car and started heading towards the park i had this pit in my stomach like something very horrible was going to happen. Maybe this was because i was so away from home or maybe because it was my intuition telling me that im really fucking up this time. Either way once we actually sat down by the skatepark there was this Mexican man, this Asian lady, 2-3 people like kinda in the distance sitting by the bowl with our drunk homie (we didn’t know at the time)nd like 2 people watching the Mexican man playing with flames ritualistic(not really it js felt like it). So BAM I bust out the scale and scale everyone their dose. There was 4 homies actually tripping and 1 getting drunk , once we get our mushies down the hatch this stomach feeling amplifys 100 fold. Letting me know that I really fucked up this time, I told the homie Z that I didn’t feel so good and felt like somethings wrong and that something was going to happen… he reassured me and we walked towards the beach.

Let me inform you that these mushrooms hit in 20 fucking minutes…Well not really I don’t really look at time when I trip so it felt like it. Anyways the 2 homies N and Z were on their own journey and ventured into the dark beach by the lifeguard shit and they came back talking about seeing the faces in the sand, me and the homie B looked and we saw the face . It was very similar to the (shpongle face) without like the extra eyes… I FOUND OUT LATER THIS FACE IS SUPPOSEDLY THE FACE OF GOD? It was said in one of the live shpongle performances I’m not sure, But it didn’t freak me out at the time it seemed friendly but the mouth kept smiling bigger and bigger so I just looked up and stared up into the abyss. Idk why it was so dark but I could see every star. Note that WE NEVER SEEN THE FACE OR HAVE EVER HEARD THE MUSIC, we only found out like 5 days later because i was watching a phyched substance video and heard him say shpongle and it just stood out in my brain so i searched it up n showed them , we all got chills instantly and even more chills when I mentioned it was smiling ,shiiiii i still get chills thinking about it.

Anyway we walk back to the skatepark and i venture off to take the infamous shroom piss and when I come back, the Asian lady is talking to B and I see he’s visually freaked, idk if she was purposely trying to freak us out or trying to trip with us or trying to hit on us..idk , either way we did not want to be there, so I said cmon B, N, and Z n we go look for our drunk homie but we couldn’t find him for Jack and we were freaking out, I just couldn’t handle with the stress of finding our drunk friend and the stomach feeling and trying to keep us all together so I just said “N gimme your keys” and I walked to his car, I didn’t expect everyone to follow me because I lowkey wanted alone time but everyone followed me to the car. Thankfully we had blankets and everything so I just layed there and prayed this feeling went away. It did not. In fact it got worse because the homie N starts freaking out saying it’s a bad trip and how everything is repeating And then the drunk homie comes into the car yelling about his green light card, I thought he was joking around so I was playing around looking in my backpack and then he looked at me serious and said MY FUCKING CARD And I panicked, I thought I gave it back to him already after getting wraps but I guess not (I DID but he lost it wit the people he was hanging out with and blamed it on me) he went kinda ape shit throwing shit around looking for his card and got all mad. And n got panicked looking for it too kinda dick riding but I got out of the car because I couldn’t think, I couldn’t do anything, I felt like someone came up to me and shook my head violently.

I had a little burrito blanket with me and I just waddled my way away from the car and stayed by the trash cans like a homeless man. So much so, a man came up to me and tried giving me money, I rejected and told him I was on shrooms. I couldn’t deal with the feeling of impending doom so I picked up my phone and called my mom. When she answered it was like 10 and I had to explain to her that I was on shrooms and that I was in the middle of LA and that I lied to her . Her and my step dad faught on the phone debating on weither to leave me there and let me deal with it or come for me. I was never so vulnerable, I was crying on the phone saying “PLEASE DONT LEAVE ME HERE, PLEASEE” all I could was beg as she was my only escape to this hell hole. I was pacing around trying to send my location and I walked towards the restaurants and I felt my head get so light like it became a pin idk how to explain but I felt like I was walking on a tight rope. I tried to look around but I didn’t recognize nothing like I was lost and then a car starts driving down the alley way towards me and not stopping idk why I thought the car would stop for me but it was just coming faster and faster and I had to jump out the way. I finally could ground myself and found one of those birds scooters n sat on it put the blanket over me and tried to calm myself down and go to my happy place, then I felt the sweetest presence with me, I suddenly felt okay. when I finally took off the blanket off my head all my visuals were cut off and it was like a Slight 2 gram trip.

When I could finally stand up, I went back to the trash cans because when I was near that car and near them I was feeling the energy get sucked out of me but when I looked at the street art in front of me I saw this mushroom man like fucking massive ( tassili mushroom man) It was so beautiful, it was made from tiny circles like the colorblind test shapes, like a ton of circles and colors. Then I audibly heard the club music around me and the mushroom man and colors starts going with the music and that was pretty fucking awesome . The worst part tho was feeling every single second and every single minute going by waiting for my mom to come, especially since I couldn’t call her to know how far she was I had to wait there looking at every car going by. Then she finally showed up nd I just felt her energy I didn’t even see the car, I BOOOOKED IT to the car I didn’t say goodbye to my homies or anything. I felt so close to going into phycosis again and I felt like if I was left there I definitely would’ve. I’m forever thankful for my mom and I’m forever thankful for my step dad because even tho he didn’t wanan pick me up he still came to pick me up and he was driving. I paid them back in gas and I just knocked out in the car I felt so bad and guilty. Idk why any of this happened or why everything stacked onto other, but this just taught me that I didn’t know anything and I needed to stop trying to be shaman. I never felt so stupid, so venerable, so lost and so fucking empty. Goes to show tho the only friend I got now is B and he was the only grounded one with me, I guess they were energy sucking parasites. Also we later found out that a women had killed herself on the beach like a hour after I left. There was definitely some sort of dark energy there. Rest in peace that lady if she passed.

And I’ve got to tell you, idk if mid-trip posting is the vibe in this chamber, but it’s just the most wonderful, beautiful, important experience yours truly is flowing with, riding on atm~💕

Here, so idk if any of y’all have ever read Stephen King’s book Insomnia, but first of all, it’s a blast, very worth the read, second of all, a huge part of the story describes how certain levels of insomnia can get you to levels of being “high” and seeing auras and magic and shit, and I’m so seeing the connection right now and shit I guess that wasn’t the peak when I started tapping this post out on my phone omg 😱 LOL sorry, I’M LOVING THIS! Excuse the all caps please I need to put this phone down love you g’night~😘

I’ll tell the dosage in a comment when I come down LOL

I like to do mushrooms and this overtook my desire to smoke weed, but every now and then I went back to weed. Ever since I had a big mushroom trip (4g penis envy) I get the same sensations as that shrooms trip when I smoke weed. This trip happened MONTHS ago and for some reason I get the same thoughts and feelings coming to my mind whenever I smoke.

Quick backstory from shrooms trip was it was great until it took a turn and in the worst parts I felt like I was getting into multiple vehicle crashes and getting badly hurt like in a fighter jet and crashing, or car crash, etc. that’s the main context relating to weed stories. The actual trip is a whole other story that I’m not going to get into.

So One incident after smoking I was watching a show with a friend when he got up and left to go to the gym. This left me alone in my apartment. Close to immediately after he left i started to feel stabbing pain in my chest, like a sword was jabbed through me. Obviously i started to panic because it physically hurt. This was the first time ive ever experienced physical pain from weed. As the pain got worse I started getting the craziest kaleidoscope visions around the edges of my eyes and they start to take up more and more of my vision until I get a sensation that I was just in a car accident ( or rather this time a motorcycle for whatever fucking reason). Through this process it felt like I was dying in a very similar way as my shrooms trip months before. It felt like I flew off the bike on the highway and had scratches and bumps all over me. I got up and grabbed some water and went to my bed I was laying down for the longest time as the stabbing pain and discomfort of being cold stayed with me. And it ultimately felt like I was straight up dying. doing certain things would make it better or worse. Through this process I didn’t want to let myself die I was holding on.

One other time that was unusual was I smoked and was working on a current project where I suddenly feel like I’m getting beat by someone who was yelling at me. I related this to smoking the weed and decided since then that maybe weed isn’t for me anymore. Now I’m just hesitant to try anything again.

The times the discomfort came with the weed I was alone so that might be part of the reason why it happens again and again but I also know that isn’t normal.

I have been curious about trying MDMA for nearly a decade now. Finally, on Saturday, March 9th, 2024, I had the opportunity. I acquired MDMA from a friend. Jamie was away for the weekend in Princeton, NJ with Taylor. It was Jamie's first time away from the children since Elliot was born 922 days ago. So, I stayed at Riley's place for the weekend (Fri-Mon) to help with childcare.

Early on Saturday, I had some time alone as Riley and Morgan went to a St. Patrick's Day Parade. They returned around 2 pm with the addition of Casey and Quinn, so we had quite a gathering. These are familiar faces at Riley's place, which put me at ease. I know them well enough to feel comfortable using substances around them. Riley took 25 mg of 4-HO-MET at 4:10 pm, and I took 100 mg of MDMA at the same time. After ingesting the capsule, I sat down on the couch near the TV with Elliott. Evelyn was playing beside me when I heard a thump and realized she had fallen off the couch. I quickly put Elliott down and picked Evelyn up. I felt terrible about the incident, hoping she wasn't hurt. She calmed down after about 2 minutes, which usually indicates no serious injury. However, it's a rule of thumb not to let an infant fall asleep within an hour of a fall due to the risk of concussion. Riley and Morgan reassured me that kids fall often and it's okay, but I still felt awful about it.

I then placed Evelyn on the rug on the floor to prevent another fall and picked up Elliott. I noticed how enjoyable it is to hold them at this age, like chubby little teddy bears. With Elliott in my arms, I walked over to the kitchen island to chat with Riley and Morgan. Riley mentioned feeling the effects of the drug around 5 pm. I, too, felt the MDMA taking hold but wasn't sure what to expect, being my first time with this substance. The come-up felt similar to Adderall—stimulated and alert in the initial stages. Earlier, Riley had prepared a rotisserie chicken for tacos, removing the white meat. The remaining parts of the chicken were on the cutting board on the kitchen island. Riley seemed perplexed about what to do with the leftover pieces, describing them as resembling roadkill and wanting to dispose of them. Instead, they uncomfortably packed the remaining pieces into Tupperware, looking both confused and disgusted. I could understand how this would be an uncomfortable task while on 4-HO-MET.

Soon after, I realized it was time for the girls' last solid meal before bed. Morgan, being attentive as always, offered to help, and I requested they cut up some plums for the girls. It's unusual for me to ask for help, but I felt comfortable doing so because it would make my life easier. I think this willingness to seek help was influenced by the drug. Morgan cut a plum into very small pieces and served it to me in a small bowl. I sat down with the girls on the floor and fed them slowly, feeling very present in the moment. It was a different kind of interaction than usual. Elliott kept clapping her hands and smiling for more food, while Evelyn, as usual, was hungry and wouldn't stop crying until she had food in her mouth again. I found the situation amusing.

After feeding the girls, it was nearing 6 pm, and I joined Riley, Morgan, Casey, and Quinn at the kitchen table. I was holding both girls at this point, one on each leg. I felt compelled to ask Quinn about their mental health diagnoses, as I had overheard them discussing it earlier. They mentioned having several conditions such as bipolar disorder, depression, and anxiety. They talked about being on medication but struggling with the side effect of rapid weight gain, which seemed to frustrate them. After this conversation, I asked Riley how they were doing. Initially, it seemed they didn't hear me and commented on my dilated pupils. When I asked again, they said they were doing great. They seemed to be enjoying the 4-HO-MET experience, listening to the conversation but also seeming to be in their own world. I felt "high" but not in the typical sense of being disassociated from reality, as one might feel with weed or psychedelics. Instead, I felt stimulated, euphoric, and extremely present in the moment. I expressed to Riley and Morgan how nice it was, feeling relaxed and communal, and how much I appreciated being with them. I also asked Riley how they were coping with life. We talked about them missing Elliott's birthday party, and I could sense their longing to be with Elliott in that moment, which made me feel empathetic. It was almost 7 pm by then.

Morgan went upstairs to prepare bottles of milk for the twins, and I fed them with Morgan's help. We then took all the kids upstairs to bed. I was in the bedroom with three tired, crying kids, which would typically trigger my fight-or-flight response. However, I felt calm and in control, knowing exactly what needed to be done. I took my time changing each kid's clothes and soothing them before moving on to the next. It took about half an hour, but they were all sound asleep by 8 pm. Seeing them all asleep in one bed filled me with a sense of accomplishment and happiness. Normally, I navigate life with a persistent baseline of anxiety, but as I reflect on this experience four days later, I find myself remarkably calm, with anxiety feeling like a distant memory. It makes me wonder how long this serene state will last.

   This is a pretty long story regarding my first and only experience with dropping acid. I get pretty descriptive in my telling of the story so I believe that should make up for the length. Hope you enjoy. (Some typos) 


    Background: Me and my friends had embarked on the stereotypical adolescent experimentation with drugs just a year prior. It had started with a curious teenager stealing a beer out of the fridge and then after a positive experience, a year of partying and trying various different substances began. In that year I had tried alcohol, marijuana, DXM, shrooms, and finally acid for the first time. This is my personal account of the experience I had with the latter.

    Lead Up: It was a cold, midwestern afternoon. Small flakes of snow and gusts of wind brushed across the dead trees and cracked roads in my small town. It was a day we had long anxiously anticipated. Since the day we first tried mushrooms we knew we would have to try acid at some point, but we had no idea how we could get some. The opportunity presented itself through my friend’s (who I will call Chad) friend’s sister’s boyfriend. He was a drug dealer on the side and had acid at his mom’s house that he told us we could buy for $25 a tab. Me and my other friend (who I will call Jerry) waited at Chad’s house as he went and picked up the acid. The atmosphere was very exciting as, like I said earlier, we had waited a long time for this and we were very eager to finally experience a true psychedelic experience. Sure we had tried shrooms at that point, but they were shitty shrooms and didn’t have much of an effect on us.        
    After waiting for what seemed like an hour, we heard the door open downstairs and Chad running up the stairs. He came into the room and, inside of a small plastic container, 6 gel tabs presented themselves. I had expected them to be small, but these tabs were in a hyperbolic way microscopic. You could barely hold them with the tips of your fingers without dropping them. They were that small. We all gazed at the magic squares like they were some sort of myth that had been proven real. We couldn’t believe what we were seeing. We actually had, in front of us, LSD. The drug that was so engraved in popular culture as being THE psychedelic. The drug that made hippies in the 60’s and 70’s go crazy. The drug that claimed the sanity of Syd Barrett himself. I had become pretty nervous of course, having it right in front of me with the intention of taking it. Yet, there wasn’t a doubt in my mind that I would be consuming it that night. 
     Chad was going to take a whole tab while Jerry and I were going to cut one in half and take a half each. It’s important to note that due to the personal circumstances of my friend Chad at the time, his parents were not present during the experience. Chad’s older brother (who I will call Greg) would be joining us in taking the acid while his friend (who I will call Alex) would trip sit. Chad grabbed a pair of dull scissors and, over a styrofoam cup, cut one of the gel tabs in half. Jerry and I took a piece each.

   The Trip: I put the half tab and placed it under my tongue for about 5 minutes before swallowing what was left. Chad and Jerry did the same as I. I had brought a pack of cigarettes with me as, although at the time I didn’t smoke, I wanted something to help relieve any anxiety I had before the trip began. I went outside onto my friend’s back patio and lit the cigarette. As I exhaled the blue tinted smoke, I examined the frosty landscape that was my friend’s backyard and the surrounding neighborhood. We lived in a small suburb on the outside of town and I had always found the soft yellow light emanating from the houses to be very homely and comforting, mystical almost. This matched with the relieving effect of the nicotine greatly enhanced my outlook and I attribute this, to some extent, for the pleasant experience I had. 
    After about 5 minutes of that, I put the cigarette out and went back into Chad’s house to join my peers. I felt ambitious and comfortable at this point so I made the decision to take another half of a tab to make a full one. My friend Jerry joined me and we both took another half from a separate tab. We sat in my friend Chad’s room and conversed while waiting for the effects to begin. 
    The first thing I noticed was a general feeling of anxiety. It wasn’t necessarily overwhelming or unpleasant, but it made me very fidgety and I began to grind my teeth as the hairs all over my body stood up. My friends told me they felt the same and this soothed my fears some more. Because I understood that I was a self-conscious teenager at the time, I wore a grey fishing hat over my head to prevent myself from constantly fixing my hair. I began to feel drastic temperature changes in the room. It would become blazing hot and then icy cold in minutes. I would cover myself in a blanket and then I would throw it off and sit in front of a fan seeking deliverance from the heat. Eventually I became grounded and chose to not use the blanket. That’s when I began the feel the brim of the hat I was wearing undulate across the back of my head in a wavy manner. This was the first time in my life that I had felt something that wasn’t actually happening as if it actually was clear as day. This made me a bit uncomfortable so I took the hat off, but decided that I had to face the trip instead of fighting it and put it back on to embrace the affects. My friend Chad told me that he kept envisioning math equations pouring down the bottom half of the wall he was laying next to. Now whether he was exaggerating a bit or being serious I still don’t know but I wouldn’t doubt that he actually did. A few minutes later Chad pointed out that he could see people holding hands and dancing on the ceiling. Jerry and I looked up and Jerry also seen the people dancing. I, however, seen plus sign like symbols begin to protrude out of his ceiling and retract in a very trippy and cartoonish like manner. 
    I was very excited to see this and was happy that the LSD we had wasn’t a dud like the shrooms. I then looked at my friend Chad’s face and it looked as if one part of his face was shifted down compared to the other side. Like there was a line of symmetry running down the center of his face and both sides were shifted. His eyes didn’t line up with each other, he didn’t look human. From here on out, things get a bit more unexplainable and I will warn that my description of my thoughts and perceived sensations may not be entirely accurate as putting these experiences into words are extremely difficult if not impossible. Reality itself lies upon a paper thin line of chemical reactions and any change in those chemical processes can have profound effects on human consciousness. Anyways, my friend Jerry began to look very uncomfortable and asked Chad if he could use his shower. Believe it or not, this was not out of the ordinary for Jerry and a good 50% of the time we were under the influence of something he would get this weird and comical urge to take a shower. As he leaves, the mental high begins to take hold. It was like I could feel my consciousness changing in a highly complex and confusing way that I simply can’t put into words. 
   I began to feel anxious again and I sat on the ground next to my friends heater and enjoyed the warmth. This heater felt absolutely amazing to me and I was glued to it. I moved closer to it and began to fall back against a box next to it, nearly breaking the door to the heater in the process. That’s when I closed my eyes and entered into what I can only describe to be a matrix fever dream. The weirdest and most bizarre thoughts came to my mind. My imagination had never been so vivid and alive before. I was in a heavy psychedelic trance and the outside world was completely nonexistent to me. I enjoyed the limitless confines of my mind, the space inside my mind had seemed to expand. It felt like the inside of my head had grown into a massive empty room and my thoughts had more space to form. It felt extremely overwhelming but more so I was unimaginably confused. Confused to the point of being unable to comprehend anything that was going on entirely. 
    After 20 minutes, I opened my eyes and found Chad’s room to be covered in moving visuals. I don’t exactly remember what they looked like, but I remember seeing these weird black eyeball things engraved in the visuals. Greg had gone into his room and Alex informed me that Chad was in the spare room watching animal planet. I dazedly walked into the spare room. Chad’s house had turned into some confusing and unfamiliar labyrinth of rooms and hallways that I simply couldn’t navigate on my own.    
    Nonetheless, I made it into the spare room with the help of Alex. I sat down and watched TV. The nature documentary we were watching showed a large desert with animals running across it. I remember seeing the sand in the desert wave like it was some yellow ocean and the animals surfed the waves while visuals covered the screen, dancing and spinning all over. Chad told me he seen the antlers of deer turn into hands that were moving and grasping on their heads’. I was in complete and utter awe. The whole world had changed and I felt like a stranger in this new land I found myself in.
   At this point, Alex had told us that Greg had left with Jerry to take him home because he was having a bad trip. Why Alex let Greg (who was also tripping on LSD) take Jerry home I have not a damn clue. Chad became extremely concerned and started lecturing me for not wanting to leave and chase after them. Looking back on it I understand his concern as Greg was his brother, but also I understood that leaving into the cold winter night to chase after someone on a bad trip while also tripping was a horrible idea. Despite that, Chad ran out of the house and Alex and I followed. Like I said earlier, it was snowing out and very cold. In my heavily altered mind I didn’t feel the cold, however, and was on a mission to find Jerry and Greg. Chad ran down the street as Alex called back for him saying that they had left a while ago and we weren’t going to catch them. Alex also mentioned how cold it was and that the cold could impact our trip. I remember looking at the snow covered weeds on the side of the road waved back and forth in a very LSD like transition. The weeds would wave with this hazy and choppy transition like in the music video for “Show Me How”. I would look it up if you want to know what I mean. Anyways, Chad began to feel the cold and started bolting back to his house which I followed him in doing.
     When we made it back into his house I was cold in a way I had never been in my life. My hand specifically was ice cold and I felt shocks of pain travel up my arm and into my fingers. This was extremely painful but Alex told me it was just the drug and that it would go away. I attempted to eat popcorn while watching animal planet, but I couldn’t coordinate anything in my mouth. It’s hard for me to explain, but it was like I couldn’t keep track of where the food was in my mouth and almost choked. We went into Greg’s room and began to watch Rango. That’s when Greg surprisingly came back and explained that a friend of his had seen him and Jerry running down the road. He picked them up, dropped Jerry off at his house, and returned Greg. A massive and unexplainable relief washed over the room and I felt amazing.
    At this point, the mental trip was peaking and I was thinking in what I felt was 6 dimensions. When I say 6, I mean exactly 6. No more, no less. The confusion was intense and I repeated phrases over and over again while attempting to watch the movie. The visuals were just as intense and I could watch Rango with an overlay of visuals, or visuals with an overlay of Rango. Hard to understand I know. Even now I can’t really comprehend it. 
   Over the next 7 or so hours the visuals and mental high stayed practically the same and I enjoyed a night of confusion and ecstasy. Objects had tracers that would switch colors and move from side to side in that same weird transition as the weeds and my Chad’s house remained a maze I time to time ventured out into. I would clumsily walk from room to room and stare at the visual covered walls. I recall walking into his living room and his couch had became a flowing waterfall of visuals. I sat down on the couch and smelled the palm of my hand where I was greeted with a highly unique and beautiful smell. It wasn’t a normal smell, but an enhanced and trippy smell that I can’t explain. Chad’s house became a house of entertainment and I was a curious child exploring its intricacies and wonders. The world exploded with excitement and new sensations that I had never seen or felt.
    I didn’t begin to come down until about 4 in the morning. I would say that we took the acid initially at 8 PM. When the effects had calmed down and I returned back to reality I made the trek home. Walking into my room things still didn’t feel the same. I felt paranoid and anxious, but I wasn’t tripping hard enough to spiral at this point. At 7 AM, I finally went to sleep. 

     Regarding Jerry: Apparently, Jerry’s trip took a turn for the worst after the initial ceiling visuals he told me. He didn’t like how fast it was coming on and he tried to take a shower to calm himself down, but to no avail. Greg offered to walk him home and he accepted. They began the 3 mile walk to his house in the remote area we lived in and they began freaking out even more in the environment they were in (surprise I know). The street lights began to dance above them and they were in a living horror movie. Greg’s friend picked them up and took Jerry home where he confessed to his mom what he had done and she sat with him for 2 hours to help him calm down. Apparently, he was stuck in a massive time loop and kept asking his mom if he was real or not over and over again. Minutes seemed like hours and from his perspective, the trip lasted days.

     Final Thoughts: I can’t say I would recommend taking LSD or not. The effects seem to be extremely subjective and the experience can change at any time. Because of its legality, it’s hard to judge how much LSD you’re actually taking. Most people can’t tell you how much a tab contains and I have no idea how much I took that night, all I know is that it is by far the weirdest substance I have ever taken and I haven’t taken it since despite the pleasant nature of my trip. If you choose to take it you should do so understanding the risks. Make sure you are in a good environment with good people and that one person’s trip can’t destroy everyone else’s. Understand that the experience will be immensely different from anything you’ve ever experienced before if you aren’t experienced with psychedelics, and make sure Jerry doesn’t run off into the cold night..

When i was 17 i decided to trip alone on 3.5 g of shrooms i had done it before with the exact same doseage and only had minor visuals. well on this faithful night i come up and it is already hitting me so hard i took a drink of water and when i swallowed it was like i was in a drum and someone banged on it completely shaking my whole perception of reality. i decided to call my good friend and just ask him to tell me everything was gonna be alright then i hang up and things get fuzzy from here all i can recall is losing my phone and not being able to figure out how to get to find my phone on my computer so eventually i gave up and started doing random things such as licking the walls and biting my shoes. eventually something must have scared me or gotten me extremely angry because i had completely obliterated everything in my room tv had been broken desk was flipped over and i have 0 recollection of what happened. later i end up in the hospital and i only remember a frame of me going to try to choke out the nurse. finally i end up in a room with my mom and dad and i am convinced i am in a simulation and nothing in here is real so according to my parents i start saying how much i hate them and started cat calling nurses and yelled “HEY BLACK DUDE” to some poor random man eventually security came and stood outside the room and closed the door i was convinced i was in some sort of simulation and i was never going to get out of here. by far the most helpless, scared , and truly hopeless i’ve ever felt. Always remember to have a trip sitter and be safe✌️

To kick off this tale, I was 17 and deeply immersed in the world of psychedelics and cannabis. My mindset was undeniably experimental, having indulged in acid numerous times at excessively high doses and thoroughly enjoying the experiences.

One day, my friend (let's call him Chris) messaged me, informing me that he and another friend had acquired 2C-B. Unfamiliar with it, I delved into extensive research the night before our planned trip. With no work obligations that day, I informed my mom that I would be spending the night at Chris's place, a routine occurrence as we hung out practically every day and she trusted him.

After school, at around 3:35pm, Chris and I followed our usual route home, walking the two miles to my place to grab a charger and some weed before continuing the additional mile to his house. Upon arrival, I greeted Chris's mom and younger sisters before retreating to his room.

Chris then unveiled the 2C-B, a white powder resembling cocaine. Initially skeptical, I trusted Chris not to deceive me. We decided to snort some around 8pm, having plenty of time to spare. Until then, we indulged in copious amounts of marijuana, burning through a quarter ounce in just two hours, smoking three backwoods and several joints.

Around 7:30pm, my mom texted me, needing me home for something. Though slightly disappointed, my adventurous spirit led me to snort a line before departing. We measured it out to be 0.57g in total, with Chris paying for 0.5g. We divided it accordingly, with me snorting 0.14g and Chris 0.10g.

I felt the effects immediately. Initially, it felt like a fire ignited in my chest, accompanied by some discomfort behind my eyes. While I thought I had some idea of what to expect, the effects would be overwhelmingly intense. Just before leaving at 8:45 pm, the lights in the room appeared blue-shifted, and the walls seemed to drip paint. That's when I knew things were going to get wild.

As I walked home in the dark, illuminated only by occasional streetlights, I was tripping incredibly hard. Feeling frightened, I kept my gaze fixed on the ground, but that turned out to be a mistake. With every breath, it felt as though the ground breathed along with me, like an elevator moving up and down a floor with each inhale. The light reflecting off the wet pavement made the sidewalk resemble a miniature cityscape, complete with cars and people. When I glanced up, I saw rows of streetlights stretching into the distance, their colors splitting into red, green, and blue. The stars in the sky smeared like white paint on a black canvas.

Upon finally reaching home, I encountered my awake mom. We exchanged brief pleasantries, and although she knew I was on something, she didn't mention it to avoid making me uncomfortable. I retreated to the bathroom, where I was startled by my dilated pupils and the sensation that my face was melting, akin to wet makeup. After spending about 10 minutes there, I retreated to my room, locked the door, put on some 4K nature footage, turned off the lights, and spent the rest of my trip with my dog. It unfolded much like an acid trip, keeping me awake until 10 am, with the effects lingering until around 5:30 pm.

The intensity of this trip left a lasting impression on me, and I never repeated it. Chris reserved 2C-B for occasions when traditional psychedelics weren't available. He had a wild experience but lost his phone during the ordeal, so we communicated via Xbox party chat. I vividly recall us laughing hysterically at David Blaine during a TED Talk. To this day, whenever David Blaine comes up, we share a laugh, reminiscing about that memorable experience.

So for context I had tripped like 4-5 days before and was a stupid ass kid and decided I wanted to trip but I figured I had a tolerance so ate close to 5g then another 3g after deciding I’d need at least 3x my regular dose from Reddit readings. I was wrong. Anyways, I was watching the labyrinth with David Bowie and. I remember about 45 minutes in I got really nauseated and threw up, just bile and it sucked ass for like 5 mins and I remember being scared my mom would hear me and I think that’s what just set everything off, I’m tripping sack mind you while I’m throwing up already. I remember going in my room and trying to lay down and the labrynth goblin mother fuckers were scaring the fuck out of me so I turned it off but i was still hearing fuckin goblins man and like a voice going oHhHhH nooooo ohhh nooo. Then everything was kinda just patterns in my room and shit with me just tweaking out, I had this tapestry that turned into like a deer head lookin demon and it was just staring at me like patterining and I had this table with stickers on it and little eyes inside bubbles would pop out of the stickers but they were just like little fractals. I decided to try and shower to sober up bad idea showered for like 30 seconds started hearin the fuckin goblins and shit and the water was horrible bro so I went into my room soaking fuckin wet and layed down in my bed naked and tried to pull up my blanket but they were just rolling in a giant like ball just back into itself every time I pulled so I just layed there and cried and thought I like made myself schizo and then I think I just stopped peaking or something and put on clothes and went in laid on the floor in my moms room and just basked in the euphoria of being in not hell and looked at cevs till I slumped.

Hello folks; I just recently discovered this sub and figured I'd share my most memorable drug experience.

So a few years ago, I was doing some yard work and ended up with a really bad case of poison ivy on both my forearms. I've gotten it many times before, but this was the worst case I've had yet- I had a patch of skin the size of my hand on both forearms that was red and blistered like bubble wrap. I went to my local clinic where they prescribed me some corticosteroid pills to help reduce the inflammation and itching. I asked them about side effects, and the doctor told me it could cause insomnia, but recommended taking benadryl before bedtime to counteract it. So I took a couple benadryl (50mg) before going to sleep that night. But in my experience, while benadryl did make me sleepy, it also would cause more vivid dreams/nightmares, and I'm guessing that the "vivid dreams" side effect mixed with the "insomnia" side effect to create what might have been the worst night of sleeping I had ever had.

It started off with me having a dream where I was standing on the sidewalk in the middle of a city, just looking around. As I did, everything started to "peel apart" into simple, single-colored geometric shapes, like if you took a 3D model and blew it apart into individual polygons. For example, if I looked at a stop sign, it'd come apart into a red octagon with four white rectangles, all of which would start to float off into the distance, getting further and further from each other. Everything around me was doing this- buildings, cars, signs, mailboxes, etc. until I was surrounded by countless colored squares all drifting away from each other into the big blue void that was the sky. As I stood there on the sidewalk, all I could feel was an overwhelming sense of confusion and outrage, thinking that "they" were trying to make things simpler, but just ended up making everything more complicated and breaking everything as a result. I just wanted it all to stop, practically screaming in my head to make it stop.

Also for some reason, the whole time this was happening, I could hear background music that kept alternating between "Somewhere Over the Rainbow" from The Wizard of Oz and "Abyss of Woe" by GWAR (a band I was obsessed with at the time).

I eventually woke up, but I didn't feel like I had woken up for real. I tried going back to sleep but every time I closed my eyes I would end up back in that freaky geometric nightmare world, so I eventually gave up and got out of bed and paced around my room. I was dissociating pretty hard, unsure if I was awake or asleep, and more than once questioned if I even existed for real. After a while it went from being scary and existential to being just plain stressful and annoying. I just wanted to go to sleep so I could wake up in the morning and get all this nonsense over with. I decided to sit down and write my thoughts out to try and ground myself, or at the very least distract myself from all the crazy shit spiraling around in my head.

I don't remember what I did after that- I think I had something to eat and drink and eventually got back to bed, so I ended up getting maybe 2-3 hours of sleep total. I felt more or less normal the next day, if a bit groggy, and I never took benadryl with my 'roids again (which, ironically, didn't give me any problems sleeping after that).

Yeah so shit happens where do I even begin. Please don't call me a dumbass I know I fucked up. So I bought some shrooms online, never took drugs or alcohol before so first time, when they got delivered I brought them home well I didn't have a scale but I had I'd say 7-8 mushrooms in the bag with the tops separate from the stem so I made myself a peanut butter sandwich got myself some ginger ale for the nausea and counted the mushrooms to ballpark how many grams I had 😂 I know right so I ate 1 big ass (1,5 inch) stem 2 (,75 inch each) smaller stems and around 1-2 top parts and I chews them sobs until they became a paste for maximux effect. So everything is going good I'm not high yet so I clean my room put a movie on then I go down the stairs and boom get hyperfocued and now I know this shit is kicking in. So I talk to my mom for about 2 mins tell her not to disturb me then I go back up sit on my PC chair and enjoy but 5 min later my PC wires start looking like spider legs and I got scared so I get up and yoo I feel like I'm on the moon like no gravity and shit I feel light and so I go on my bed and now I'm chilling yk I feel connected to everything and warm and my room starts changing colors all of a sudden and now my head feels weird and my younger bro is playing fortnite with his friend and he is loud as fuck and now I'm scared he is gonna walk into my room and every 60 seconds I practice saying "don't come in" so if he does I have the strength to speak now this is where shit hits the fan I start losing grip of reality, and I'm talking to myself saying "can I go back to reality" like it was to much and on the corner of my eye I got demon staring at me telling me how I'm a loser and how I'm doing nothing with my life and so I'm like shit I gotta get outta here I took way to much I can't explaine the panic I felt at that moment something so beyond I never felt that way yk. So I get up demon man tells me don't get up you gonna regret it and I'm like naa I gotta get outta here this is too much, my mom's in the next room with my grandma with dementia and I go In and tell her i took drugs and I need help and im losing grip with what's real and whats fake she thinks im joking and my grandma keeps repeating "are you drunk" again and again (dementia) while im hyperfocued on her face and now I'm in panic mode so i run downstairs looking for my cat he comes up to me and run head first into the wall full speed run up i still dont know why i did that i guess i was trying to get out of the house. Now my mom's freaking out she calls my damn aunt for some reason and she asks me do you want me to call 911 and I'm like yeah call please get me outta here while I'm in another dimension at this point all 3 of my brothers are watching me lose my mind while I'm hugging my grandma and she keeps saying the same shit over and over again and now I think I'm in a time loop now I'm trying to run outta here my aunt comes grabs me and tell me behave how the fuck can I behave I'm going crazy now I'm complaining suicide, I got a neck knife and I'm like Im stuck in this time loop reality is melting before my eyes like I can't explaine what I'm experiencing at that moment you never felt something like that something so crazy and out of this word like an ego death on steroids where nothing exists it was too much I thought I was gonna die and the only way to end it is to kill myself lucky 911 comes paramedics come in hold me down and check my bp then they say something that scares me "ravjot buddy there's nothing we can do right now unfortunately your gonna have to ride it out" gahd mother freaking damnit I'm scared now they take me to the hospital at this point I don't know what happened I'm not aware and blacked out apparently when I got to the hospital they said I was screaming very loudly and I told a female nurse I liked her ass💀 dead ass it was crazy they now put me in a private room cuz I'm im too loud i dont remember why but they tied my hands and feet I did onther suff but i don't remember thats my story its alot worse than it sounds and i dont want anyone to experience what i went through especially a time loop 🤫

Hello everyone,

I am hereby sharing my trip experience that i had. Hope everyone enjoy my story and excuse my average english skills.

2 days ago, on a great saturday night, my 2 great friends and me decided to trip in my house. We drove around 2 hours to reach there and brought another great friend to tripsit us. Us 4 arrived around 2 am and we decided to take the tab at 230. We were talking when the come up started and we felt restless. Mind you, we have tripped a few times before so we knew this was not uncommon. The 4 of us went upstairs to smoke a joint at the balcony. That is when we peaked. We were chatting when my friend played king gizzard lizard wizard and from then on, i 100% knew we were tripping balls. We were mindfucked and my friend who were tripsitting us had to finish the joint, even though it was his first time smoking weed. My friend played another song from the band, and its called "im in your mind". Damn, was that a fricking absolute experience. It was like the title was describing what it was like. My friend invited us to go down and watch spiderman across the spiderverse. I didnt remember any details about the movie or the storyline at all but i just know that the movie was amazing. It was like the movie was talking directly to me. Then, i had the realization that it was probably true as i knew everyone in this world is me and everything and every experience is reflected back to myself. Its kinda like this: Im tripping, and then i realized im tripping (that is when i started thinking and not being present) When i started thinking, i could tell and feel that the charactes in the movie was kinda dissapointed in me because i was not in the present moment. It was the same for my friends, in which i could feel and hear that they were calling me telepathically and when i was on the verge of answering, i was doubting if it was even real ( hence i started thinking and not being present) and the characters and my friends were upset again because i failed to connect with them not in this reality ( at least that is what i felt at that time). This thought loop happened a few more times and When the movie ended, we chilled for a bit. I wanted to listen to more music with my bluetooth earphones when i dropped it and lost one of the pieces. It took me a while to find it again and when i did, it wasnt working. I was sad because thats the second time ive bought it as i lost my first one. I wanted to walj around the garden while listening to some music and staring at my mums flowers, but i was thinking that it would not be a full experience if i was only listening with one ear. I considered listening on speaker too, but thats the ssme case. Thats my next thought loop of me thinking if its worth it to just put it on speaker and go around my garden lol. Took me a while to get out of it and when its coming down, me and my friend (2 was already asleep) decided to smoke some weed and chill. Then, i decided to watch the whole midnight gospel in netflix and scott pilgrim the animated series. I even watched a few love death robots episodes. Those are amazing and i had the same experience as when i was watching the spiderman movie. I could describe it in detail, but what i felt is like i was really connected to them and how they feel. Just when i started to not being present, they just shrugged it off and be dissapointed in their dialoges with another character. One important event to note is when i was watching the movie, ( i could not remember which of those 4), i had a realization to look up as the characters are mentioning that we are all connected with each other with a link and that we are all the same being and one. Its like i know that they are me and i am them, with no differences. When that happened, i looked up and saw a bright beacon of light penetrating through my roof from the sky into my head, like when aliens are abducting in a movie scene. The light flashes all 4 of us, indicating that we are all connected in a spiritual level and thats the proof which we cannot see with our naked eye. Whats suprising is the movie that was playing behind the scene (netflix) was also explaining to me exactly what i was thinking and feeling, but when i realized that, i felt that they were dissapointed cuz i was not being present if that makes sense? It was cool and insightful and im glad i was able to see and feel that. After that, we went to sleep and went back. Any ideas as to what im saying? Do you guys have any similar experience to this regarding the movie talking to me/ describing what i feel in the moment about my surroundings with their dialogues subtly? Any comments and questions are greatly appreciated and thank you for reading this mediocore story of mine compared to many others here lol

It was sunday and I decided since I don’t have my cart all just take Benadryl and this was my first time in one night I swallowed like 18x25mg = 450mg My whole body 30 mins after felt like I couldn’t move like there’s 2x gravity. When I waited my room was moving i was seeing ghost cats walk around and it look like a tall man was peaking over my door then I fell asleep and had the crazy dream that felt so cool and terrifying running in ur dreams .

If this reaches 5 likes I will go into every detail I remember from my sleep trip

TLDR: shadow men are real and I took too much of Benadryl. Had a good high

Here is the link to the article of what happened, if needed I can prove my identity with my release papers and prison ID card, I will also post a pic of my piss test the day after to show everything i was on.

But first things first, the report:

Here I am, 9AM on a Monday morning sat in my mates room, we've both been awake for about 2-3 days on coke and we've already had a gruesome combination of substances, realistically we should have gone sleep, but this was no normal day.

I had recently ordered 10 gamma goblin acid tabs and missed the delivery, but the post office has just opened and so I began my quest to acquire the final ingredient of my dreadful fate.

On the way I meet another friend of mine who has some cannabis, a useful tool to aid in my adventure of insanity, and so I invite him to accompany me on my travels. By the time the first spliff is dead we've arrived at my drug dealers HQ: The Post Office.

I go inside to retrieve my magical items and upon exiting the fine establishment we both drop 2 each, go to the shop and each buy a potion of minor confidence to enjoy as we smoke the next zoot and wait for the magic to start working.

After about 20 minutes we start walking back to my shared house and by the time we get back its kicking in for me, nothing heavy but everythings nice and interesting again I introduce my friends downstairs and go upstairs to give my ex a tab, then take another one myself. She doesn't wanna come downstairs with my boys so I return to them alone and we're just chatting random stuff, my other friend who doesn't do acid asking how it is and listening to music and that, but I start noticing really anxious about myself and the situation for no reason.

Now I've dealt with this before on psychedelics and I've done shrooms and acid a lot in the past but normally by myself or with one close friend maximum.

I decided, in my multi-substanced sleep-deprived brain, that the best course of action to prevent anything bad from happening is to take another tab.

-it was at this moment that he knew, he fucked up-

So my memory gets quite messy after this point as I began to come in and out of awakeness and awareness of my actions, i.e I keep "coming too" with no idea what im doing, i could get deep into everytime I woke up but theres no point the 3 big ones for you to know are these:

I come too in the backseat of a parked car with Albanians that I know in the front seats. -what the fuck- I look down and see cocaine and 50 pounds in my hand. I'm not sure if I'm selling or buying so I hand them the money with a questioning look on my face. They give me a tenner back and send me on my way with the coke. Weird.

After a few time waking up in my mates room again I wake up after having sniffed a line, my mates are looks worried now and everytime I wake up they keep looking more and more stressed, there saying i just start going into myself when I blackout and start mumbling high concept incomprehensible things about life and consciousness and this and that.

Because of my friends worrying me about what I was doing while blacked out my anxiety increase, from this point every time i "wake up" im trying to figure out how much time has gone and what i was doing and saying while i was blacked out but my friends wouldn't tell me they where just saying idk and I could read there was somthing going on i wasnt aware of.

This last time I wake up in my friends room there having a conversation about Manchester football, the same conversation they where having the last 4-5 times I just woke up, starting again from the exact same words with some really weird vibes about them, this convinced me i was in a time loop because i took too much acid so i ran outside to the back garden and threw up.

I instantly felt 100% better my head was clear and I had no more negative vibes around me, I go back inside, skip my mates room and go up to my girlfriend and started crying. "Babe I can't lie I done too much this time, I've got no fucking idea what's going on I can't even remember if I've spoke to you since the trip started". She told me I've been up 3ish times already and I start getting worried so I lay down on her and just try close my eyes.

Then I wake up again I'm standing in the corner of my room backed away from my girlfriend in bed, she's asking if I'm okay she looks really worried but scared as well I'm talking to her saying I don't know what's happening I just wanna stop the trip.

Then my friend who is also tripping with me knocks on my door, I open it and feel relief, he Tripps hard like me I think he gets what's going on he tells me I'm gonna be okay and to just listen to him. I say okay thank you and we hug.

I then wake up in the kitchen, holding a knife with my friend Infront of me covered in blood and screaming loud "stop stop I don't wanna die"

I drop the knife and he walk/limps past me downstairs screaming as I'm stood there tryna figure out what the fuck just happened.

The only bits I remember until being at the hospital is trying, and failing, to jump out of a window head first.

Sorry it was very long I just feel like I had to share this properly.

I ended up stabbing him 5 times, the news said 3 but a mutual friend has told be it's 5 with 6 scars as i went all the way through his leg.

I got a very light scentance, 2 years for stabbing him, because he didn't make a statement and I was on so many drugs no intent to actually do it could be proved, and 2X 3 months scentance for spitting at the feds who arrested me, i got out about a week ago a little early, on tag.

If you want to ask anything please feel free to msg/comment, thank you for reading I hope you have a good day.

I’ve wanted to trip for years now, and after finally getting my hands on some shrooms (what I’m told is P. Mexicana) I was excited for my first psychedelic experience. I thought I was well prepared: I had carried out a lot of research online, read some literature and mentally I was in a really good place. Just to be on the cautious side, I decided to take 1.5g after originally intending to take 2g. I thought this would only be enough for a light trip, so I chose to take it on an empty stomach in order to intensify the effects and make the most of the shrooms. I ingested the medicine with some dark chocolate, partly to mask the unpleasant taste but also because I had read that chocolate intensifies the effects. As you can see, I didn’t give the shrooms the respect they deserved whatsoever, and they were right to put me in my place for that.

I took them with a friend from our Swiss equivalent of High School, at his place. We were listening to Clair de Lune while ironically watching a Mandelbrot fractal set zoom on YouTube, and we both felt the effects pretty soon. Just 10 minutes after ingesting we both felt very relaxed and lighter, while simultaneously melting into the couch. I also felt a gradually increasing sense of euphoria. I took note of the effects in my notebook; I wanted to document the trip a bit to help better reflect on it in my sober state (it's funny, you can easily see how my handwriting changes as I start tripping more heavily). We listened to some Pink Floyd and the music was a whole lot more intense, you started hearing things in the song differently and picking up sounds you usually never would. It felt a lot like MDMA, and for a brief moment I was getting excited for an MDMA-like experience. However, that phase ended soon: after having hit the half hour mark, I started getting some visuals. Inanimate objects such as clocks and pictures hanging on the wall seemed to be moving; I was encountering the common effect where it seemed as though they were breathing. The wood grain in the ceiling also started moving, it started flowing like a current, sometimes the individual lines morphing into each other. I tried to explain what I was seeing to my friend but just couldn’t find the words. This annoyed me a bit because I knew it should be possible to articulate what I was seeing, I just couldn’t find the words in my vocabulary, so I took a mental note to read more books. I also started seeing patterns everywhere. Things that I would normally easily overlook creeped into the foreground. Not just in the wood, but in the wallpaper, on the lid of my food box, on the leaves of the room plants. But it didn’t stop there with this plant. It seemed so much more in focus and was standing out from everything around it. One big leaf in particular seemed to be looking right at me. It caught my attention and wouldn’t let it go. Once again, I was trying to articulate this to my friend but just couldn’t. The best words that came to mind to describe this weird sensation were, I shit you not, “the plant is screaming at me”. I wanted to write this down but realised how comical it would be for anyone reading it.

As the intensity of the effects gradually increased the trip became less and less enjoyable. Comfortably numb was playing, and it felt a little bit too intense. I saw my mate was having a good time so I waited for the song to finish so as to not be a killjoy, then looked through my playlist for something else to play. I played some Lorde but skipped through practically everything else. None of the songs felt right. My mate said he didn’t care what I played but I had a growing feeling of self-consciousness with my music. I found it hard to commit to a song, so I stopped it and looked for another one but while doing so I hoped I wasn’t being annoying. I kept trying to say stuff but once I started it felt irrelevant and so I stopped and mostly stayed silent. I switched to non-lyrical music, hoping this would be calm me down more, but the discomfort lingered on and when my mate began to laugh, I hoped it wasn’t because of my music. I felt awkward about practically everything. Usually I speak with my mate in German, however we had been speaking in English for the past hour which suddenly felt weird, so I tried to switch back to German but that just felt even weirder, so I decided to remain silent once again. The shrooms confronted me with an unbearable level of self-consciousness, which I’m still unsure what to make of, but I suppose it is nothing more than a lesson.

We then decided to go outside in the woods. It took us about 10mins just to get ready and leave the house due to how lost and confused we were. Once outside, about an hour into the trip, I reached the peak. I looked at my hands and could see every single detail. I could see every single hair and every crease and fold in the skin incredibly vividly. We moved to the direction of the woods, however in order to get there we needed to walk along a road. It was hard to act normal, I couldn’t even think straight. The senses were heightened to the point where I could vividly hear the birds chirping and people talking in the distance. At one point I was walking in the middle of the road, oblivious of the car behind me. I told my friend that those around us most be noticing our odd behaviour. He told me not to worry, he joked that we were just tourists exploring unknown territory, which sort of became a running joke throughout our trip. My mate made other jokes and talked a bit, which calmed me down, however I still felt unable to respond to him. Up to this point all of my negative perceptions and thinking hadn’t really captured my active attention. I sort of just let it flow past. I was so sure I was going to have a good trip that the idea that I was currently going through a bad trip hadn’t even crossed my mind yet. But as we approached the woods this realisation dawned on me, and for the first time I was actually quite concerned. We then sat down on a bench in the woods in silence, riding out the peak. I had significant visuals: I saw patterns in the gravel and sometimes the whole ground even seemed to be moving. After a while I noticed I had passed the peak, and I immediately felt more relaxed. I noticed my mate was now having an intense time, so I tried to calm him down as best as I could with my newly regained ability to speak. However, it looked as though he was coping by himself. As more time went by, I felt more and more relaxed and could finally enjoy the trip. We chilled in the woods a bit, admired everything around us, enjoying the trippy visuals, before going back to eat some food.

On the way back there was this lady in the woods who we had to walk past. I noticed that she was obviously staring at us. What was pretty creepy, though, was that I couldn’t see her eyes. Where her eyes were supposed to be there was just blackness. In retrospect I suppose she was probably just wearing sunglasses, however it looked very creepy. Luckily this didn’t freak me out, as I was feeling a lot more relaxed and just riding out the trip, so I just laughed and told my friend how the woman was blatantly staring at us. He told me that she wasn’t, that it was just in my head. I immediately acknowledged that this was definitely possible and was impressed by what the mushrooms could achieve. While walking back to the house through the village I experienced more of this. I constantly felt like those around me were staring at me. At one point while walking past a group of people I could see their heads in my peripheral vision following me and their eyes turning black, like with the woman in the woods.

The effects then gradually got weaker and weaker, and we spent the rest of the time just eating and watching YouTube videos.

All in all, I can say that this was definitely a very intense and personal experience, and I was powerfully confronted with some personal stuff to deal with. I would never have expected 1,5g to do so much to me and have most definitely learned a lesson there.

If you’ve read up to here, thank you very much. Feel free to comment and have a nice day 😊

Before the Trip and Method of taking:

I did shrooms last month and what I experienced kind of making me believe that it needs to be shared. It's my first time doing psychedelics but I did alot of research on different substances and I ended up on shrooms since it's a lot easier to acquire here in my area. So, I ate 1 gram each of Tidal Wave and Jack Frost. I don't know what comes in my mind but I made a freshly made lemon juice with some sugar(I know, not the lemon tek most of you know lol) because it's been 30 mins and I thought the mushrooms I bought lost it's potency. I also didn't eaten anything other than those

I was really planning to just stay at home and take my time but my friends suddenly invited me to hangout in this Mall about 4 km away from me, then my stupid mind made a decision knowing that I took some shrooms yet still agreed to meet them. We planned to meet first at their house to wait for the others and then about 10 mins we're complete and went in the vehicle(I can't tell you what kind cause you might be able to guess where im from and if im not wrong, personal information is a no no here.) I usually wear a glasses and im required to do so because i have a strong astigmatism but I didn't.

PS: Set and settings is really important and never try to recreate my mistakes

Midtrip and Experience:

I'm starting to getting aware that I'm tripping but I'm not ready for what I'm experiencing. It's overwhelming and scary at the same time and to remind you, it's my first time. In this vehicle, it's not just me and my friends are here but also some strangers so we're basically commuting. I noticed that most of this people is staring at me and feel like talking about me for an unknown reason but when i really focus on them i also noticed that its just the effects of mushrooms. We made it to our destination and decided to order some food first. The mushrooms are making me hear things and even the smallest things like laughs and clinking of utensils gets amplified and echoes in my head. I'm also starting to get anxious and worry that i might not be able to hear my voice and suddenly shout. I told my friends that maybe I should take a nap first because it's effects are getting stronger. The moment I closed my eyes everything went silent and an entity that oddly feels familiar started talking to me saying that everything that's happening here and what I'm experiencing is his work. He wanted me to be here and wanted to let me know that this is the only way to teach me. I'm the one he chosed because I'm also the one who caused this. Afterall, he said that I'm the one who created him so that he could create my life. He also said that everything is happening because of me that the concept of good and bad really doesn't matter.

He showed me the different realities of life, I'm a beggar in the street asking for help, I'm a dog waiting for my owner, I'm a person who's in a coma yet aware of its surroundings. I'm the visitor that Stephen Hawking's waiting for, for him to prove a point. Im right there yet I hesitated to do so because he will use it for his own gain. My thoughts are not my own but a mere reflection of something else that I'm not ready to comprehend. This being told me that I do not belong here. He showed me my life and how im wasting it, I'm aware but I'm not able to do anything as if everything was planned beforehand. He told me that me being aware is already a punishment of life as if he's treating consciousness like death. After all of what's happening to us, it will all be repeated in a never ending cycle because we're trapped in this reality and we are all a prisoner of ourselves.

He also showed me that everything we know is the concept of our physical bodies and not the real thing on our faces. colors, sounds, taste and all of our senses is a distraction to forget who we really are, this physical world is nothing but a strings and he's always telling me that in a use of my eye problem which is the astigmatism.

Conclusion:

Looking back at it and knowing what it feels like really made me think that the concept of bad and good is just our way to understand things without really looking what's inside of it. I didn't know if im having a bad trip that time because somehow it helped me be open in a field that im not familiar of. It's kind of scary but to think of it really hard, it's just a symbol of something much deeper that at the end of the day might help me.

I know it's just the hallucinations this substance caused but it's hard to decide which is which because of what we don't know and what we should know.

Thanks for reading my Trip Report and I'm really sorry for mistakes on making that, I'm bad at English lol. Have safe trip Psychonauts! I hope you'll be able to know who you are.