Where's the thermostat?

Looking for an old friend, Frank Hodge Cartersville, GA

Hello World

I want to be a lump of coal. That would mean I've not only become an element, but moved 6 places on the elements table.

...and asks how much for a drink. The bartender replies, "For you, no charge."

I am the Flying spaghetti monster. Is anyone else here?

Opening this thread for the first time I read T:bagging AOE? just thought I'd share. yw

NASA picked up a signal just before the bigbang.

"Oh-oh".

Seriously, this thing's already pissing me off.

We are allied to; 1780s, 2011, 1955, 9000, and 1984.

We know that 2013 is allied to the end of time. Beware, they may have more allies though, lurking in the shadows.

Neutral; 1930's, fifthworldproblems,

Deliberating an alliance; 1920s, 1558, 2012, 1800s, and year 0.

So denizens of the beginning, I ask you to garner support. Raise awareness of this war in the multitude of times still unaware. Convince the times that aren't certain where they stand to join us. Post us suggestions for the war effort for anything that we mods might do to help.

The end began this war, but the beginning will end it.

Has anyone else, besides Adam and his whore, done this whole "sex" thing yet? What should I be doing? I'm not even sure what it is.... Do I need a partner?

Knock it off, guys. Seriously, just because the Endtimes started this doesn't mean you have to fight back. I've fought a Time War before; I saw my homeworld, my entire people, burned from existence. I am the last of my kind.

Now, before I go on, I know most of you are getting bored, but before you say 'tl;dr', I suggestyou sit down and shut up because

I

AM

TALKING.

Now that I have your attention... Beginning and End, Creation and Destruction, Alpha and Omega, if you're feeling poetic, weren't meant to fight: They were meant to serve as different phases in the same cycle. You see, time is made of this wibbly wobbly... timey wimey... stuff... and when the beginning fights the end, that stuff risks exploding. If you want to blow up all that wibbly wobbly timey wimey stuff, and destroy reddit itself, by all means, go ahead. Before you say "BUT THE ENDTIMES STARTED IT AND THEY HAVE A PARADOX MACHINE", let me say this:

THEY'RE BLUFFING YOU.

There's only one paradox machine in existence, and it's safe on my ship, the TARDIS. The Endtimes don't have a paradox machine, and I'm sure as hell not giving to them. Before you ask, I'm neutral in this war, strictly trying to end it, so no, I'm not giving it to you. And before you say "WELL YOU'RE NOT TALKING TO THE ENDTIMES ABOUT THIS", that's because I just haven't gotten around to it. I'm working on both ends of the timeline. I already had to talk to the Romans... anyway, I'll ask you all one last time:

Peace? Or all-encompassing destruction?

I mean, there really isn't anyone else to submit anything to it yet, right?

http://www.reddit.com/t/heatdeathoftheuniverse//comments/rpfrk/unquote/