/r/stoprape
Rape is a tractable problem, and we can all do our part.
End the rape kit backlog (USA)
Resources
Hostile sexism is a risk factor for rape. A score > 0 indicates an increased risk. A thorough understanding of consent reduces the risk. Who do you know who needs it?
Protect children
End Child Marriage (USA)
Rules
#1. Must be about stopping rape
This could include specific actions to take, content that inspires/supports activists, scientific research on rape prevention, specific barriers that need to be knocked down to properly address the problem, evidence on the scope of the problem, etc.
#2. No victim-blaming
It's never the victim's fault. The end.
#3. No gender-warring
While it's important to acknowledge people of any gender can be raped, this is not your soap box to vent about how men have it worse. If you want to switch the discussion to talking about rape of males, at the very minimum 1) ask yourself why, 2) start your own post (preferably one that is grounded in actual solutions and not just misogyny, which exacerbates rape).
#4. Be civil
It is important to engage in productive and respectful dialogue to effectively stop rape. Efforts to prevent and eradicate this crime will require buy-in and understanding from all members of society. If you lack the patience to participate in such conversations in a constructive manner, give yourself permission to step away.
#5. No misinformation
Misinformation about rape can perpetuate harmful stereotypes and myths, resulting in victim-blaming, which can discourage reporting and hinder investigations. This can also impact public perception and understanding of the issue, leading to inadequate laws and policies, and a lack of resources for victims. Thus, spreading misinformation obstructs efforts to effectively address and prevent rape.
#6. Comments, questions, or posts directed at mods, mod decisions, or the sub are subject to removal.
Users with genuine concern can reach out through modmail, but this subreddit is for the discussion of stopping rape. Meta posts that distract from that goal will be removed.
Rape is one of the most severe of all traumas, causing multiple, long-term negative outcomes.
The impact of rape on victims includes emotional and psychological effects, physical effects, victim blaming and other kinds of secondary traumatization.
Characteristics of rapists
Not all offenders have the following characteristics, but each increases the chance that a person is a rapist:
/r/stoprape
4,432 Subscribers
13:38 UTC
False rape accusations are rare, and typically don't name an offender
False rape accusations are rare, and only 18% of false accusations even named a suspect. In fact, only 0.9% of false accusations lead to charges being filed. Some small fraction of those will lead to a conviction.
Meanwhile, only about 30% of rapes get reported to the police. So, for 90,185 rapes reported in the U.S. in 2015, there were about 135,278 that went unreported, and 811 false reports that named a specific suspect, and only 81 false reports that led to charges being filed. Since about 6% of unincarcerated men have--by their own admission--committed rape, statistically 76 innocent men had rape charges filed against them. Add to that that people are biased against rape victims, and there are orders of magnitudes more rapists who walk free than innocent "rapists" who spend any time in jail.
For context, there were 1,773x more rapes that went unreported than charges filed against innocent men. And that's just charges, not convictions.
For additional context, in 2015 there were 1,686 females murdered by males in single victim/single offender incidents. So 22x more women have been murdered by men than men who have had false rape charges filed against them.
For even more context, there are about 10x more people per year who die by strangulation by their own bedsheets than are falsely charged with rape.
Meanwhile, by their own admission, roughly 6% of unincarcerated American men are rapists. And the authors acknowledge that their methods will have led to an underestimate. Higher estimates are closer to 14%.
That comes out to somewhere between 1 in 17 and 1 in 7 unincarcerated men in America being rapists, with a cluster of studies showing about 1 in 8.
The numbers can't really be explained away by small sizes, as sample sizes can be quite large, and statistical tests of proportionality show even the best case scenario, looking at the study that the authors acknowledge is an underestimate, the 99% confidence interval shows it's at least as bad as 1 in 20, which is nowhere near where most people think it is. People will go through all kinds of mental gymnastics to convince themselves it's not that bad, or it's not that bad anymore (in fact, it's arguably getting worse). But the reality is, most of us know a rapist, we just don't always know who they are (and sometimes, they don't even know, because they're experts at rationalizing their own behavior).
Be wary of dudes who defend their "falsely accused" friends, since chances are their friends weren't actually falsely accused, they are just in denial. Add to that, male peer support may be one of the most potent predictors of perpetration of sexual aggression., so chances are the friends of the "falsely" accused also have... problematic views towards women. This is why it's so important to teach consent, and start by believing.
13:37 UTC
Is this SA
Hi I’ve never posted anything and honestly this scares me a lot. I met a guy last night for a night in kind of date and when I got there it just was obvious it was more of a hookup vibe. That is absolutely okay I didn’t mind that.
Until we got into it and he basically clawed my insides and I told him to stop and he did. That was fine not a big deal, I get that some men don’t understand female anatomy and what does and doesn’t feel good.
It was the next part that really shook me up. I was giving a blow job and he pushed my head down, when I tried to pull away he continued to push. I wasn’t being gentle either I was using my arms and my back to push back because I didn’t want him to finish in my mouth and he kept pushing me down. He finished and finally let me go and I told him he shouldn’t do that unless explicitly stated that someone is comfortable and he made some remark about it being hot.
I feel completely violated and I need to know if I am being overdramatic. It feels like I’ve been assaulted but I don’t know if I have.
Please can I gain insight
09:45 UTC