/r/ShittyPickupLines
42,359 Subscribers
Hey baby, have you had multiple strokes?
Can I get a few?
02:40 UTC
06:25 UTC
Do you have a CDL?
For that dump truck of a booty
01:37 UTC
Hey girl are you a slot machine
bc I wanna put all I have onto that coin slot
06:23 UTC
Hey girl, have you been running through my mind all day?
Because you look tired
16:17 UTC
Hey girl, are you from Europe?
because Europe piece of shit
21:21 UTC
hey girl are you wheel gator
cause i wanna put my strike chain in you
23:32 UTC
Hey girl, are you a popsicle?
Because I wanna press you down on the counter and snap you in half.
00:24 UTC
If you were a steak, you would be burned to a crisp, offering a sacrifice worthy of our Dark Lord.
01:48 UTC
If you was a burger at Mickey D's, you'd be straight-up McGorgeous, fo'shizzle!
09:17 UTC
Are you a feminist? Because I wanna ...
... respect the hell out of you. I wanna respect you in the living room, I wanna respect you in the kitchen, I wanna take you to the bedroom and respect you all night long.
16:44 UTC
Are you the Mario to my luigi? Because i want to super smash bro...
06:47 UTC
I'm no mathematician, but I'm pretty good with numbers. Tell you what, Give me yours and watch what I can do with it.
09:38 UTC
I know where the sin flows freely... it’s a den known as “My Lair”!
09:48 UTC
I blame you for global warming... your sizzling looks are literally melting the ice caps!
09:11 UTC
I came first in this year's Best Lover competition.
00:13 UTC
Roses are red, Cheddar is cheese
Here's what you would look like if you were black or chinese
19:36 UTC
Are you Michael Jackson?
Cause every time I think of you I just beat it.
01:12 UTC
Hey girl, are you cool and slightly arousing?
Cause I’m like an asshole on fire and baby you’re the butt-cream for my rash.
14:24 UTC
Make like Pennywise
and eat my children
08:22 UTC
Girl, You’re like a ketchup packet
Cause you can squirt all over my glizzy
08:02 UTC
Do you like T-rex’s
Do you want to make my Dino sore
07:59 UTC
Are you a fire hydrant?
cause when I’m drunk driving off of E and K going 93mph through an elementary school zone at 2:42 pm and I hit you… you make me wet
07:57 UTC
Let's make like a fabric softener and 'Snuggle'
06:01 UTC
Are you a banana? Because I find you a-peeling
07:42 UTC
Hey girl, are you an American school? Cause I wanna shoot some kids in you.
I had to, I'll see myself out
04:00 UTC
Do you do porn?
17:18 UTC