/r/ShittyPickupLines
42,613 Subscribers
People say that, when they give you an inch, you take a mile.
In that case, my penis can be a mile long for you 😎
04:58 UTC
Hey baby i went to the penis explosion chamber…..
but for u, it grows back.
08:03 UTC
If I could rearrange the alphabet, "I" would still come before "U".
19:57 UTC
Hey, let's go to my place....
...and give my foam matress some disgusting memories to supress
16:32 UTC
Hey girl, are you from sea world? Cause I wanna get wet when I see you
Cringe i know 😉
21:54 UTC
Hey, are you a tree?
Cause I'd love to take that wood.
17:02 UTC
"you can call me the crawler-transporter cuz' i'm boutta' do a roll out"
11:57 UTC
Are you a classic children’s party game which involves sticking a tail on a donkey?
Because I want to put it in you blindfolded
04:55 UTC
Is your name 1917 Russia?
…because I feel an uprising in my lower class. 😏
23:17 UTC
David Blaine called,.........
he asked when we're gonna get together and make some magic happen?
03:18 UTC
Hey girl, I like those pumps!
I'd like to take you home and give you a few more...
18:24 UTC
Sorry, but I have to report you to OSHA…
because it looks like you need a railing.
02:40 UTC
Hey girl, are you Nina Tucker?
Because I want to make you my bitch.
16:15 UTC
Hey Girl, are you a squirrel?
You're small, twitchy, ginger, and love a good pair of nuts in your mouth.
16:03 UTC
Hey girl, my heart has four chambers.
So do my basement and this revolver. Get downstairs!
02:20 UTC
I'm not Haitian,
But I'd definitely eat your 😺
14:20 UTC
I need a pick up, can yall form one, one word at a time, please
07:15 UTC
Did you heat the gym today?
Cause you're looking hot
05:27 UTC
Girl are you a nissan z?
Because youre certainly a fairlady
19:39 UTC
Ya know you make me feel like a Little Caesars pizza....
Hot & ready in 5 minutes 😉
18:11 UTC
Are you a car alarm?
Cause you got my attention. However after that I will ignore you.
17:23 UTC
You like an iced coffee on a rollercoaster
Giving me chills and thrills at the same time
16:30 UTC
Are you a suitcase?
Cause if I were going somewhere I would pick you up.
16:16 UTC
Hey baby are you an angel?
Cause you’re as high as a cloud.
03:06 UTC
Your face is good
I'm a Soos
03:10 UTC
“Are you a Japanese teacher?
'cause you're lookin' sensei-tional.”
gets politely slapped by Japanese teacher
I had this for the longest time, but never really posted it until now.
04:44 UTC
Hey Girl, wanna get some Monkey Pox?
Because I could shoot some into your box.
14:11 UTC