/r/Petloss

Photograph via snooOG

r/petloss is a community of support for Pet owners whose Pets have passed away. This is not a place to post lost Pet stories or any other news about Pets.

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The Rainbow Bridge

Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge.

When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge.

There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together.

There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable.

All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigour; those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by.

The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind.

They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent;

His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster. You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again.

The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart.

Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together


r/petloss is a community of support for Pet owners whose Pets have passed away. This is not a place to post lost Pet stories or any other news about Pets.


  • Rules

Only self posts are allowed. Images can be provided within the context of the self post.

Please be sensitive while posting comments. Trolling will not be tolerated.

No fund-raising/self promotional blogs or any promotion of any other business


/r/Petloss

49,301 Subscribers

1

My cat died suddenly and now I can’t stop worrying about his sister

My 7 year old cat died suddenly this week. He was healthy, had been to the vet in the last year, and I woke up on Monday and he was dead on the floor. I have been a wreck and have overanalyzed every detail of the few days before. My vet said it was probably an undiagnosed heart thing since it was so sudden, but I didn’t get a necropsy because the idea sounded so awful at the time, so I don’t know for sure.

I can’t stop worrying about my other cat. She is 9, also healthy, also has been to the vet. I even took her two days ago for lab work and everything came back okay, but I can’t stop waking up at night in a panic making sure she is breathing.

Does anyone know how common sudden death is in cats? Any tips from a vet?

1 Comment
2024/03/29
02:18 UTC

1

Stay, Until the End

My family had six different cats in the first ten years of my life (I'm currently 25). Cookie, Kareem, Moe, Baggie, Karma, and Molly. My step father had adopted Cookie and Kareem off the streets before meeting my mother, who'd adopted Moe and Baggie shortly after their marriage, and then adopted Karma a few years later. Molly was the outlier, dropped off by a family friend who seemed to vanish off the face of the earth with empty promises to return for her cat one day. She never did, and I don't believe my parents ever heard from her again. Molly was a few years old at the time, but we never found out just how old she really was.

I loved all the cats, of course, but Molly became "mine" by default, which I later realized was because she was too big and slow to get away from my grubby little child hands. I'd scoop my arms under her stomach and carry her around the house to make her spend time with me, and occasionally I would carry her down the street and walk her home. This was an attempt at getting her to lose weight, which ultimately ended up a fruitless effort. She hated being carried like that, but she never seemed to mind the walks.

She was the only of our five cats unable to catch squirrels or birds, though it wasn't for a lack of effort. She was just too slow, weighed down by, well, her weight. Plus, Molly had been declawed by her previous owner, a process I find unethical at best and evil at worst. The only defensive measure she had left was her teeth, which she never once turned on me, despite my antics. One could tell that I did get sometimed get on Molly's nerves, but there was no questioning I had a unique bond with her that I didn't share with any of the other cats. Despite my insistence on picking her up and making her spend time with me, she often chose to do so of her own volition anyway.

When it came to decisions about Molly, such as what treats to buy, and what collar she'd wear, what bowl she'd eat from, my mother allowed me to choose what I thought she'd enjoy. I cycled treat flavors to give her a variety, my child mind imagining that like me, she would grow weary of always eating the same thing. The first and last collar I picked out for Molly was light brown, adorned with little peace symbols. At the time, I didn't know what the sign meant. I simply liked the design, and when I showed my mom, her explanation of the symbol reinforced my decision. Molly was the most peaceful of our cats, after all.

I had several years with Molly, across two US states and four homes, but do we ever have enough time with our furry friends? Inevitably, she eventually fell ill. This wouldn't be the first cat I lost, but it would be the most devastating. When you're a kid, optimism is in much higher supply. When she started to decline, I assumed it was just a cold or something small. I got sick at least twice a year and I was always okay, so why wouldn't she be okay too? Of course, that's not always how it works.

When the day came that Molly had to go, I forsook my daily routine of video games and playing outside to sit with her and cherish what time we had left. I'd lost pets before. There's an atmosphere about your home when it's time for a member of the family to depart, and that feeling had settled in. I don't remember getting her in the carrier, nor do I remember the car trip to the vet. I just remember sitting in the office, dreading her turn. We were taken back, eventually, and the doctor informed us of Molly's liver failure. We could prolong her life by a little, but even as a child, I knew that would be selfish and cruel of me to keep her around in so much pain just for my own sake.

My biggest regret, and please try not to judge me, as I was only ten, was when it came time for her to be put to sleep. I panicked, and insisted I couldn't be in the room. My mom asked if I was sure, and I said I was. We waited in the lobby for what felt like an eternity. That remains one of my life's biggest regrets. Maybe to some that means my life is boring, or uneventful; such that not attending a cat's passing makes the list. Regardless, Molly went to sleep for the last time in a cold, foreign place, accompanied by only a stranger in her final moments.

If I could go back and sit with her, I would. I have for every pet I've lost since, and I will for every pet I lose for the rest of my own life. I'm not religious, but I cling to the belief in an afterlife. I need to know I'll see them again; that I'll see her again, and that I can tell her I'm sorry for leaving her. If I'm lucky, maybe she'll have forgiven me. I know cats can sometimes be stubborn.

I have a shadow box on my desk, with a picture of Molly and I on a bench in New Jersey, likely taken by my mother around 2002 or so. Her peace sign collar rests in the frame, beneath the photo. It's been fifteen years since she passed in 2009, and every now and then I jostle the box. just a little to hear her bell jingle.

All that to say: cherish your time with your pets. When it's their time, be there until the very end. Talk to them until they're gone. Don't sit in mournful silence, but let them hear your voice. The pain of loss is exacerbated by the guilt of leaving them alone. Fifteen years have passed and the feeling of betraying my not-so-little kitty still eats at me. So, for both their sake and your own, stay until the end.

2 Comments
2024/03/29
01:53 UTC

3

Has anyone had their cat visit?

My Maincoone passed away 6 weeks ago and since his loss, I swear I still hear him playing outside my bedroom door at night like he used to do. I live in an RV and the sound is very distinct and trailer makes a thump sound like when he used to jump off the couch. He was my baby for 13 years and best friend. We traveled the country together so it makes sense his spirit is coming back to comfort me. 😭 please share your stories do I don't think I'm going crazy.

5 Comments
2024/03/29
01:43 UTC

4

Put our 12 year old German shepherd down yesterday

I’m so sad. My life for 12 years was surrounded by my precious girl and taking her for walks, feeding her, cuddling her, etc.

Today the door bell rang and I jumped up to stop my dog from barking but it was silence

My heart is so broken

Hugs to everyone who needs one with me today

2 Comments
2024/03/29
01:40 UTC

16

Today..... My baby is gone forever

At 1:15 est. my beautiful Chinese Crested Mei-Ling was put to sleep forever. I had to end her suffering from Stage 4 Mast Cell carcinoma. She was seemingly healthy and running around just 6 weeks ago. It was aggressive and awful. She deteriorated so fast. She was 9. I feel like my heart has been ripped out. I think I'll have to write more as days go by because now I'm sobbing too much to continue. Thank You for reading

6 Comments
2024/03/29
00:24 UTC

24

My puppy got hit by a car this morning.

My red lab, Remy, got hit by a car this morning. I was inside working and I heard the most horrible screech and a truck slam on breaks. She had gotten out by chewing a hole through the wire in our fence and I had no idea. We rushed her to the vet but she didn't make it - the vet said her back was crushed. The driver had no words and I have no clue what I even said. I absolutely do not blame him but... I can't stop thinking of all the things that could have led to this.

I cannot think and I can't breathe. I never spent enough time with her and she didn't deserve this. I cried so hard and my sister drove us to the vet and the entire time she was screaming and she was in SO much pain. I've never ever felt before. I can't imagine what it was like. Life is so unfair and she was too sweet for this. She was only two and I feel like I never properly got to know her.

My girl is gone.

9 Comments
2024/03/29
00:11 UTC

2

How common is it that your cat has bonded with other families?

I had an amazing 19 years with the best, most unique and best natured cat. I knew he made friends with all the neighbours but I had no idea how far he went. At least 10 people have come to me with stories of him seeing them daily and being good with their animals and friends.
My guy loved people and would always greet people he didn't know and greeted everyone when entering a room.
I'm pretty proud he had his own human friends. I just don't know how common this is. I know he had his routine and would go greet and hang out with people while I was busy but we're talking about 8 homes all said the same thing. He would see them every 1-2 days , often just to check in and/or hang out.
Unfortunately a negligent vet, who was the only 24 vet close to us seemed to have given him a cocktail of drugs to boost his books that ended up meaning we had to put him down. He was 100% fine so this was a shock to all.
There's still come neighbours I have to break the news to.

1 Comment
2024/03/29
00:11 UTC

6

I lost my cat/brother/best friend to straddle thrombus a couple of days ago

When I was 7 years old, my mom came home from a girl's night out with an orange alley cat that my cousin could no longer care for, and we eventually named him Caesar. For the next 9 1/2 years, our bond grew and grew and he was my favorite kitty and according to my parents, I was his favorite human. He gave me so much unconditional love and great memories. He was so much more than just a cat to me, he was my brother and my best friend. He was the best kitty I have ever known.

Caesar was overweight for the majority of his life (definitely got extra food outside being an indoor outdoor kitty), which likely eventually took it's toll on his heart. On the night of March 25th my dad let him inside and went to bed and he seemed okay, but my dad noticed that his back end looked a little narrow. This was at around 9:30 PM. The next morning my dad woke up and heard some strange meows that he thought were coming from one of my other kitties. He soon realized that it wasn't coming from her, and instead was coming from behind the couch. He discovered Caesar there, and tried to place him on the couch and he dragged himself back over there. I woke up to some commotion between my brother and parents and this was when I found out he was not in a good condition. He lost control of his hind legs and his tail. His back feet were ice cold and his pads were purple. His breathing was very labored. He stopped crying whenever we would come back and pet and talk to him, and he was alert and responsive. I thought we were going to the vet to try to help him get better, because he was such a resilient little guy and had survived previous serious medical bouts, but as I was getting ready, my mom informed me that he was going to be put to sleep. I can't describe what I felt in that moment beyond shock, anger and depression all at the same time. He began crying and meowing in pain in the car ride there, and would stop whenever we started petting him. He cried out when the car stopped. He cried out in the waiting room, and he cried out when they took him away from us for a little bit to put the catheter in. But when he was brought back to us, there was no more crying. He laid on this towel on the table and he was silent the whole time we were crying and petting him, saying our final goodbyes. He was leaning into our pets and rubs. He seemed so at peace in that moment, like he knew he was gonna be okay. He had been to the vet before and been fixed up so I hope that being there somehow gave him comfort in his final moments. He was sedated and then given the final injection as we said our very final goodbyes. My sweet baby brother was gone before I even knew it.

In the final months and weeks of Caesar's life, we noticed behavioral changes. He was starting to stick by us a lot more often, which we just brushed off as him mellowing out as he got older. I didn't notice it until looking at pictures of him, but he had lost a lot of weight in the last year or so. In one of his final weeks, he started hanging out in my room more often. He snuggled by me on my bed for what I recall to be the first and only time. The last night/early morning that he spent in my room, I was spooked awake at around 4 AM by some weird meow/cries that I had never heard from him before. I had a bad feeling that he was hurting but my parents thought he just wanted out. Those were the same cries that were coming from behind the couch the morning of March 26th.

I have so much regret. I wish I had paid attention to him when he came in that final night, and loved on him for a while and let him love on me. I wish that I had checked out his hind legs again to see if they were warm or anything before they gave the final injection. I wish that we took him on regular vet check-ups so that we could have maybe caught something. Maybe if I had pushed that I thought something was up with Caesar the morning he started meowing/crying out in my room, we could've caught something that was up with him and maybe he could've had some good time left. I wish that we kept him as an indoor kitty from the moment we got him so that he would've been less susceptible to disease and been at a more appropriate, healthy weight. (he was an alley cat so he loved the outdoors. we tried to keep him inside several times throughout the years but he just kept losing himself being indoors all the time). But I know that his final moments could have been much worse. He could have ended up outside while this was happening to him, and he probably would've drug and hid himself away out there.

The first night it felt like he was laying on my chest and filling it with warmth and love, and in the morning I saw him between the head of my bed and the wall and then he faded away. Our other outdoor kitty seems to look for him out there, and she's only been coming back inside for long enough to see if he was inside. Our indoor cat seemed very sad when we didn't come home with Caesar., and she's been trying to comfort us a lot and love up on us these past 2 days. I am incredibly attached to this picture frame with 3 photos of him in it. There's a claw shaving that he left behind (it is incredibly likely that it's his because no other kitty was on the part of the couch where we found it) that I've placed inside the photo frame. I wanna get an epoxy kit thing so that it's safe forever. A huge part of my pain is that it was so sudden. Though we had noticed behavioral changes, we all thought he had some more good years in him. We thought that for his age, he was in good health.

I love and miss him so much. This is the most pain I have ever gone through in my whole life, and I can't believe that my kitty is actually gone. I am a mess right now and I have been crying for days, and woke up sobbing these past 2 days. I miss so many things about my sweet little guy, like when he would bark at us when he wanted something like attention or food, or when he would beat up on the dishwasher when he wanted food and beat up on the window when he wanted in. He used to do a specific meow whenever he would climb up onto something, like he was announcing it. He had such a loud, beautiful and radiating purr. I'm gonna miss seeing him on the porch nearly every day when I would come home from school and let the dogs out. He was like a brother and best friend to me, and he was my favorite kitty ever. It feels like there is a massive hole in my chest. I feel guilty about the idea of moving on in the future. I feel so sorry that his final hours were in pain and I can't believe that he's really gone. I hope that he visits me in my dreams and like he did when I saw him before he faded away. I hope that there is an afterlife where I will get to see Caesar and love on him like I am longing to do now. Rest in peace big guy.

5 Comments
2024/03/28
23:09 UTC

12

Can’t stand the idea of being alone since he’s been gone

My baby Toothless passed when the school I teach at had ski week. I was lucky that my family was able to drop everything to be with me. I’m not too keen on spring break starting tomorrow. I was looking forward to spending this break with my boy. I had plans for us this summer since it was my first summer break where I had saved enough to not work and just spend time with him at home. We were going to add another dog to our family. Then he passed. He passed on the first day of my last break. I don’t want to think about my apartment empty without him. I have things to keep me busy but nobody to keep me company. I feel like I have all this love that I’m so used to giving to him and it’s not going anywhere. I miss being lazy with him and only getting out of bed to bring him on his walks. I miss sitting in sun spots with him and talking to him. I miss our little moments because they were always the best part of my weekend and breaks from work. He was the best parts of my day

3 Comments
2024/03/28
22:33 UTC

41

My baby passed away in his sleep

He’s my family dog who I’ve had since I was 10. I’m 24 now so that means I’ve had him for longer than I haven’t. He was 14 and turning 15 this year. A yellow lab. He was such a good boy and so gentle. He was so old and slowing down, his back legs would give out frequently but his appetite was never ending (as lab owners know).

He loved to eat food and I remember telling my mom, “If he ever stops eating, we’ll know something is really wrong.”

But today he woke up, ate his daily slice of bread from my mom, had his breakfast from my dad with a scoop of pumpkin, and went for a walk. Then he went to sleep on his favorite rug, and he just passed away. 😭😭

I’m 1000+ miles away now but I will be going back to scatter his ashes. I’m glad I got to see him during the holidays, he looked so stunning and handsome in front of the Christmas tree. He loved sleeping under the furry tree mat.

I know he was my baby but also an old man and it was getting to be his time but right now it feels like nothing is going to be okay. My whole family is so sad & my parents are empty nesters and they spent their time taking care of him.

I’m so sad and everything hurts. I can’t bring myself to eat or do anything.

6 Comments
2024/03/28
22:29 UTC

10

Everything hurts and it doesn't feel real

My sweet sweet baby girl passed about 3 hours ago. She was getting worse this past year, but nothing untreatable, until 6 days ago. Wheezing breaths, just having to use her whole body to breathe. It was awful to watch. The blood panel was normal, the initial view on the X-rays looked normal. I suspect she developed some kind of growth in her throat somewhere—she lost her meow 3 months ago and in the last few days she would make these painful looking swallows. I wouldn't have sedated her for surgery anyways, not at her age.

It was so kind and peaceful. We paid for a vet to come to the house, she was warm in her blanket, watching cat TV, she ate a bite of a chicken nugget and drank water, she was right next to me and my parents the whole time. She relaxed then went to sleep and then got the final injection.

I know it hasn't been long at all. I don't know. I just need to tell someone about this, I think. It hurts more than anything Ive ever felt before. I had her since I was a kid, she was 17. I don't remember life without her.

I thought I was gonna have until tomorrow, but seeing her have to open her mouth to get a full breath, I wasn't gonna do that to her.

The vet just called back to discuss her X-rays. The initial vet didn't see anything major, i don't know. I wanted to wait until I heard from them, after they went to the radiologists for review, to make my decision. But they called later than they said. Fuck. I don't know. I don't know anything right now.

I can't imagine not kissing her and petting her and smelling her. That I'll never be able to hold her on my shoulder again the way she loved, or rub her cheek, or have her sleep next to me. She's gone. It hasn't fully sunk in yet. Nothing feels real right now. I've cried so much this last week.

Sorry this is so rambly and long. I'm trying to process what just happened.

I will love you forever, Biscuit.

3 Comments
2024/03/28
21:15 UTC

10

We took her on a beautiful hike and she got to see more of the earth. We were gonna grow up and travel together.

Just to find out that dogs that knew her far before us betrayed her. They killed her. Her own family. I saw her. She's gone now. My smart, rowdy puppy is just gone. Like we weren't just together at the vet and enjoying life together. Like I didn't just see her 20 minutes prior. I don't know what do to. She was just a baby.

3 Comments
2024/03/28
20:49 UTC

27

Nine months without you.

So much has happened since you had to go. We got a new puppy, another Boston terrier, and he has helped heal my heart so much. But he isn’t you. He doesn’t snuggle in my legs like you always demanded to. He doesn’t “smokey woo” at us when we come home like you used to. He isn’t scared of thunderstorms but I still panic every time we have one that I need to comfort him. He does love me, and I love him. And then I realize how odd it is to be loving another dog that isn’t you.

I miss you. I miss you so much it still hurts so badly. I know it was time and you were ready. I replay how you looked up at the vet when she came to our house, and it’s like you knew. You didn’t bark at her, you just laid there…ready to go. Every time I see Ghirardelli chocolate caramels my heart hurts. I remember feeding them to you as your final goodbye, and boy did you love them. Up until the medicine kicked in, and then you couldn’t even finish eating the one in your mouth.

I put you in the basket and kissed you as many times as I could, and sent you on your way. I would give anything to have more time with you. I miss you. I love you.

7 Comments
2024/03/28
18:53 UTC

15

Our little 5.5 old darling cat passed away unexpectedly after a normal CT scan

We have two cats, one adopted from a family and one rescued from the streets. Our little one who was rescued from the streets was only 5.5 years old and passed away day before yesterday.

He was always a little sickly since we rescued him. He fell ill every now and then. Few weeks ago we took him to the vet because he was coughing and wheezing once a day, everyday. His xray showed some sort of a mass between his lungs and his heart. His blood results came back positive for FIV. We think he must have had it since he was a baby. It would explained why he fell sick so often.

We took him for a CT scan and a biopsy day before yesterday and came back home, waiting for a call to tell us that it was time to pick him up. When the vet called he said that our cat was not waking up from the anaesthesia, his lungs were full of fluid and they are not able to get him enough oxygen. They were still trying when he called. We asked him to just hold on and keep trying until we reach the hospital. His heart stopped 3 minutes before we reached.

I cannot stop thinking about so many things:

  • He loved food but he was on an empty stomach for the sedation. He passed on without having breakfast. It was his fav meal! This bit haunts me.
  • We weren’t around when he passed away
  • His last visual of us was from inside his carrier, meowing at us while we said ‘It’s okay baby. It’s just a scan. You’ll get a nice nap okay? We’ll be back soon’.
  • His last visual ever must have been doctor he was scared of
  • A box of his hypoallergenic food (He had some food allergies) was delivered while we were at the hospital. He’s never going to be able to eat it. I know he din’t like it as much as his salmon mousse anyways.

We cremated him today, on a dark grey rainy cold day. By some miracle just when the cremation was happening, the sun came out. It wasn’t even in the forecast today. It’s been shining all day. He loved sunshine.

It’s hard to explain how everything has changed. It feels like our house is also breathing in small gasps.

My husband and I are having a really hard time. I cannot stop trying to find some magic way to talk to him in my dreams, but for possibly the first time in my life I cannot remember my dreams anymore.

I feel like I’m not even able to comfort our other cat, who only sleeps or asks for love. I’m constantly doubting if how much I’m comforting him is enough or not. And then suddenly today, my tears feel like they are stuck heavily in my chest.

Does it ever get better? Our cat was never just a cat for us. He was and will always be our son. And without him, everything feels colourless.

4 Comments
2024/03/28
18:47 UTC

57

It has been 3 months and I still can’t wrap my head around it

How could he just cease to exist? Where is he now? Im not religious or spiritual. This is the first time in my life that I desperately want to believe something but I just can’t. I can’t believe Im never going to see him again. I can’t believe he can’t enjoy life anymore… I am so angry, why did this life had to take his beautiful life away from him. He enjoyed life way more than me and most people I know. He deserved to live more than I will because he truly appreciated life every second of every day. What is even point of life when the most full of life being you ever met just vanishes and is ripped off of their life. I miss him so much. Is there any atheist or non believers who had a very difficult time after their pet’s death? And how are you dealing with it? Did anyone here start believing after their beloved pet passed? I am so lost in this world without him.

22 Comments
2024/03/28
18:36 UTC

2

Your perspective on pet loss and grief

Hi! It's almost one year since my cat Eskil passed due to hcm, only one and a half years old. This year has been really difficult, managing the grief and loss. Still breking down multiple times a week. I feel like I've learned a loy about myself at least, and gotten a new perspective on life. One thing I have learned is that it helps to hear other people's stories. I was wondering if any one would like to share their perspective on pet loss and grief. Especially interesed in the stories where some time has passed since the passing of the pet.

Thank you for reading! Happy easter.

3 Comments
2024/03/28
18:09 UTC

3

Partners dog passed away

Hello all,

I just wanted to post here for some advice to help my partner through his grief. His childhood dog was put down very recently and it was all very sudden. He is not someone who expresses his emotions but I can tell he’s struggling. We have talked and he’s not sure what I can do to help, so I was wondering if anyone here has any advice? I was thinking of painting a portrait of his dog for him and his family to keep but apart from reassurance and comfort I don’t know what else to do. I’ve had two dogs pass away but my grief experience was very different and it’s not comparable. Any advice is greatly appreciated as I just want to help him, not only through the grief but to help process it. Thank you all

5 Comments
2024/03/28
17:52 UTC

18

Grief comes in waves.

I posted on here earlier this week about how im finally doing better around 3 months in. I have a new dog, who i adore. I woke up already in a sour mood and laid in bed staring at photos of Rollins. It's also rainy and gloomy, which already is enough to depress me.

Today i had to take Damian to get shots, and was speaking to the vet about my dog Rollins that passed, i dont know if that triggered it or what. But he told me how he couldn't believe how hard he fought and how long he lasted after his cancer diagnosis and that he was in awe basically of how well we took care of him and how much money we spent on him.

He picked Damian up and joked about how he could never do that with Rollins. Rollins would nip at strangers trying to pick him up, or vets atleast for the first 5 years of his life, he would have to be put on sedatives before appontments, but then he was visting doctors so often that he got used to doctors.

Before today, i hadnt cried in over a week which is crazy coming from someone crying just about every day for the majority of the 3 months. I came home and sat on the floor crying my eyes out just as bad as i did the first couple of weeks and i have an aching pain in my chest while trying to stop myself from crying again. Im not sure why im sharing this, i guess to show that you can be doing better and function, find joy in things again even though a piece of you is missing, but that you can also break down and still grieve months later.

I just really miss his quirky personality, he was the boss and he would let everyone know it, when you were cooking, he would open the kitchen cabinet, grab the oven mitts and run around with them taunting you, everytime you opened the basement door he would come running because his favorite ball was down there, he knew what day Saturday was and that it was time for a busy bone - he'd bark on cue Saturday nights for it, you couldnt even spell w-a-l-k around him, because he caught on with that. Just miss him and want to share a photo of him since part of me sometimes forgets what its like to have him here or what he looks like.

Thanks for reading.

Edited to add photo of him playing with one of the balls i mentioned, i still have them sitting up on the freezer in the basement... https://ibb.co/Fhh1Smw

5 Comments
2024/03/28
17:47 UTC

11

It’s been 6 weeks and I wake up screaming

I lost my 3 year old buddy to a stroke 6 weeks ago. I’ve cried everyday since. The last week has been particularly awful. Every time I try to fall asleep I feel this horrible sense of loss and despair and pain and right as I’m supposed to sleep I jolt awake crying out.

I’ve never had this happen before. I thought I was doing better. I just feel like it’s my destiny to lose everyone and everything I love.

I don’t know how to fight despair, it’s based in reality. I will lose everyone, eventually. 💔 any advice is welcome

2 Comments
2024/03/28
17:46 UTC

3

I lost my dog of 5 years last night in most traumatic way

Last night I had no idea that It would be last night I would get with him,and right now I feel so much anger, guilt and can’t stop crying about him not being here and I couldn’t sleep in my bedroom where he passed. I don’t know how I can ever step in there.

2 Comments
2024/03/28
17:36 UTC

38

We lost our little guy.

We got him almost 10 years ago after we got married and he was a rescue and he was perfect. He took care of us and was the head of security and made sure we were safe. He was my best friend.

He had congestive heart failure, diagnosed 16 months ago, and it was tough around New Years but he came back very strong. The last 3 months, aside from medicine and some coughing, it was like nothing was wrong. He played with the cats and the chickens and barked and trotted and hopped and ran around and laid sideways swimming on the carpet.

He wasn't interested in his food on Monday like a thousand days before and he became very tired since. Last night it took a sudden turn very bad and I had to call the doctor over and have her do her thing so he wouldn't keep suffering the way he was.

There's been a good amount of tears the past few months as the reality really started in but I'm destroyed. All I can do is nibble around the periphery with my thoughts otherwise I'm on the floor sobbing.

After it felt like we almost lost him around New Years, he stuck around and got to see all the big snow which he loved so much. And then he stuck around to see some great spring days.

He was resting by the door and got up like he wanted to go out maybe. I called to him from the dining room and he didn't respond right. He's an alert pup and didn't perk up the right way or at all. I called him a bunch of ways for a minute and I could tell he wasn't registering my voice at all. I went over and I could tell that he could see. My wife went into the bathroom and he began to seize. I held him as best as I could so he didnt bump things and I called the vet. He had a tough couple of minutes but the vet was there within 20. He calmed down after the big ones and had a few relaxed moments. As the vet prepared, he started in again and you could see it in his eyes.

Then it was time to go and he left us forever and my whole world is destroyed and the most beautiful dog that everyone loved is gone.

https://i.imgur.com/rBzUhx1.png

7 Comments
2024/03/28
15:57 UTC

14

I miss you so much, my love

Today marks 2 months since I said goodbye to you. I still look for you everywhere and hope I'll wake up from this nightmare and will see your sweet face again.

I'm no longer the person I used to be. I don't even feel like a person anymore, just an empty shell of myself.

I just wanted to tell you that I miss you more than I've missed anything in this life. You brought me so much joy and harmony with your very existence. You were the absolute light of my everyday life, you gave meaning and purpose to the most boring or gloomy days. I never felt lonely or scared because of you. You always licked away my tears when I was sad and made me feel like the most special and loved person on this planet. And I loved you, too, oh how much I loved you with every fiber of my being. I could feel your heart beating in my chest and mine in yours. And I had no doubt this was the embodiment of what pure, perfect and unconditional love means.

I know our love is bigger than death and that one day, I'll find you again. But until then, I will always miss you and long for you.

Run free, my angel.

Your human mommy

3 Comments
2024/03/28
15:54 UTC

21

My cat died a terribly and traumatic way

My cat of 7 years that was a feral that just always stayed around my house and was so sweet and i even adopted one of her kittens that was dying and nursed him back to health. Recently i decided to get her spayed and she was also pregnant so she also had an abortion and I kept her inside and let her out after 5 days bc that’s what the vet said. because she’s technically a feral and never been inside i was still trying to get her used to being inside. i came home yesterday from work to find her weakly meowing and i then i realized there was blood everywhere. i don’t know what happened but her stitches popped and her insides were out. her intestines were stuck to a chair :((. i had to clean her intestines as much as possible and wrap it in plastic and a ward towel and heating blanket. she was dying in my arms. i have seizures so i can’t drive so i had to wait an hour to be taken to the ER. She was put down and i’m happy she’s not in pain but i am blaming myself. i loved that cat especially because i have my first cat as an adult through her. I blame myself for not keeping her inside longer. i blame myself for walking home that day instead of ubering. i blame myself for staying at work later that day. i don’t know if she would have lived if i came home earlier but that is terrible way to die. no living thing should suffer like that. i just hate she suffered so long and i blame myself. i am traumatized and ive been having flashbacks. there was so much blood it smelled like iron. i keep having flashbacks about trying to get her intestines together. i’ve experienced animal and pet loss a lot especially working in an animal facility but never something this graphic and horrible. i still have to bury her body. i just hate i learned in the worst possible way and now my OCD is triggered. i’m scared to leave my animals alone. everytime i see her son now or go outside im just reminded of her. i am not used to not seeing her everyday.

5 Comments
2024/03/28
15:10 UTC

14

Saying goodbye to my little love

My fiancée and I had to help our beloved cat cross over on Tuesday. She had lymphoma and it was moving too fast, resistant to the drugs we tried to help her with. I am very sad, and prone to random outbursts of tears. We had a wonderful forty minutes of play and love before the vet came and helped her cross. It just kills me to think that I'll never kiss her head again, never hear her little sounds, never feel her warmth on my chest. When I watched the vet take her out of the room we were in--a room made to say goodbye in--it really hurt. I am very proud to have been there with her when the time came, but the goodbye afterwards was brutal.

We ordered her ashes and will continue to talk with her, sharing her memory. I truly hope I'll see her again someday. She is one of the things I love most in the world, and I don't know what to do right now but hurt.

We took all day yesterday to mourn, look at photos, tell stories. It was healing, but also hurt.

I just miss my friend, my baby. My little love.

4 Comments
2024/03/28
14:45 UTC

161

My boy died this morning. Struggling to understand what happened

He was a 15, nearly 16 year old labradoodle. I just want to know what happened, it happened so suddenly. Going to miss him so much.

This morning he went for his usual walk and he was happy running and jumping around giddy for his walkies as he always is, you wouldn't have guessed his age seeing him. He came home, had something to eat then went to his bed tired as he always does after using all his energy during his walks.

Not even 2 hours later I heard yelping, I rushed to see what was wrong but he was just laid in his bed and at first it seemed like he was having a bad dream but when I went to comfort him he wouldn't wake up. He didn't respond to noise or touch, he was just laid there eyes slightly open, and then started breathing faster, and his body stiffened up, then he suddenly defecated and urinated, still without moving. Before I could contact family and prepare to rush to the vet he had passed away.

Edit: Thank you everyone, appreciate the kind words and support.

19 Comments
2024/03/28
14:02 UTC

3

2.5 year old goldendoodle - taken from us in a matter of seconds

We lost our beloved goldendoodle on Monday, she was only 2.5 years old. In character and beauty she was such a remarkable dog.

She was born with serious megaoesophagus which meant her life was limited to begin with but we had managed it successfully after many months of thinking she would not reach 8 months old. Due to this she was closer to us than any creature I have ever loved as she needed extra levels of attention and had such a vibrant love of life perhaps because she knew it was so fragile in her case especially. I have never encountered such a friendly and playful dog, and I generally find all dogs to be lovely. The breeders said they would take her back from us when we realised her condition but as you will all know, there was never any chance I would give her up after she had come into our home.

Our special girl fainted a few nights before her final morning on earth and then again the day before. On each occasion she was up in seconds. The second time seemed more like a seizure but a video vet told us that the presentation suggested she could wait a couple of days until we were home (we were visiting family).

Naturally I cannot stop blaming myself for not ignoring this - but if I try to be rational her death was so sudden and rapid that what little I might have been able to do probably would simply have only kept her alive for a few minutes more at best. We did not get a necropsy as I hated to see her dirty and cold. I felt the right thing to do was to let her body go - given it had failed her so much throughout life.

In reality I think she had a weak heart as I noticed over the years that she would become exceptionally tired after extensive exercise. Her megaoesophagus also led to a few bouts of pneumonia which were successfully treated, but it leaves scars and weakness over time.

She was playing with me normally moments before, then she hopped on to the sofa and rested on my lap. This was not unusual but given she was a big dog it was not something she did all the time. One moment she was sleeping, then the next she convulsed, let out a harrowing scream and was gone. No heartbeat, no breathing, her eyes completely unresponsive. I even had a stethoscope with me and used it immediately. I wish I had tried CPR but I know it has relatively little success in most cases like this and may have simply brought her back with significant brain damage only to be put down.

I try to console myself that she died in my arms and felt safe rather than isolated in a hospital without her loved ones around. But my God, I miss her so much. That age is just not fair for such a wonderful spirit. I would do anything just to know she did not suffer.

I’m sorry for any person or companion that has experienced this. Our house is completely bereft without her.

I have heard of lots of dogs succumbing to heart failure or aneurysms etc, but rarely are they this young. Other than the fainting I mentioned there were no signs whatsoever outside of her preexisting condition. She ate well, exercised well, and was as loving as ever. My only recollection is that she perhaps seemed more needy than usual and my partner mentioned she seemed to grind her teeth that morning - which she had never done before to my knowledge. Has anyone experienced something similar with such a young dog?

You remember all these things in hindsight and begin to thread them together into some cohesive cause, but I can’t really imagine that it would ever have occurred to me such small things could possibly lead to or be a sign of what I assume was a major cardiac arrest.

I hope if anyone else reads this and has similar fears it will give them the impetus to get their pets checked out, though I would add due to her condition my girl was regularly at the vets and had only weeks before been checked over. I suppose if I had known heart problems were likely I would have insisted on a scan - but that’s all with this knowledge available to me, at the time she was just my happy and friendly girl.

Thanks for reading about her. She would have loved to play with all of you.

3 Comments
2024/03/28
13:22 UTC

8

54 hours and I'm heartbroken

54 hours ago me and my sister had to put down our 15 year old cat. We had for for 13 years since I was 12. She was in my life for over half of it. She moved out with me and her bonded pair when I moved away from home for the first time. She helped me through so many things. It was so sudden. She got a blood clot out of no where and went from perfectly fine to gone in under an hour. We didnt get to say a proper goodbye and our last moments with her were so traumatic and rushed so she wouldn't be scared anymore. The sadness comes in waves, and her bonded pair keeps looking for her and laying next to the spots she always slept in. I don't know how to heal from this. I don't know if I will ever heal from this. All I can think about is waiting for her ashes to come home and cry.

3 Comments
2024/03/28
13:21 UTC

3

Can Laps of Love euthanize a pet outside if the weather is nice?

I’m worried my other dogs might freak out if they’re around it and was wondering if Laps of Love could do it on a porch or lawn if it’s nice outside. Thank you.

7 Comments
2024/03/28
12:12 UTC

16

My life feels empty

Yesterday, I said goodbye to my 16 year old little lion of a cairn terrier, Sophie.

About a year ago, I knew something was wrong. I’d always been on-top of her health. I spared no financial expense, even when I couldn’t really afford it. Drained savings, maxed out credit cards, borrowed money. I stayed home from work during thunderstorms and blew off social engagements when she wasn’t feeling well.

Around a year ago, she stopped willingly eating. Our veterinarian did a bunch of testing and there were some abnormalities with her liver and kidneys. We switched to a prescription k/d diet and suddenly Sophie couldn’t eat enough. She would gobble any food down immediately. We had additional testing and ultrasounds done which showed nothing wrong. We tested for Cushings - negative. Maybe a tumor or cancer? No. Arthritis or other pain causing abnormal behavior? We tested for everything and started all kinds of supplements and medications. Thousands of dollars of testing and we couldn’t locate a problem but the issue kept progressing.

Sophie became withdrawn, showing no interest in other animals or people. She had no excitement for anything. She started peeing in the house. Long walks, car rides, and going to the park, things she once loved, she no longer had interest in. Sophie began walking slowly, like she didn’t know how to walk. She started pacing aimlessly around the same path in the house, all day and all night, only stopping to take long naps or to eat. She couldn’t seem to remember how to get in the house or how doors worked. She was easily startled by furniture that had always been there and she was getting stuck in bookcases and under chairs that she tried to climb into or walk through.

I had dedicated myself to making sure her physical health was excellent that I never realized the cognitive decline taking hold. I didn’t even know it was a thing. CCD. My dog had severe dementia and by the time I realized it, it was too late. Sophie was present but she wasn’t there.

So I scheduled a veterinarian appointment yesterday, hoping for some miracle drug even though deep down I knew. The vet watched Sophie for an hour- never concerned with the people in the room, unconcerned about me, just walking around the perimeter of the room the entire time. The vet mentioned that Sophie was in great physical shape and that she could have kept going but that this was going to be who she was.

Was Sophie living or just existing? The dog I loved with all my heart had been gone for a long time but she was there, walking around in front of me. I made the decision and she didn’t want to go. It took extra sedative half-way through the procedure, which was gut-wrenching. My girl was in great shape- and yet I was putting her down.

Today, my life feels empty. I miss my little lion of a dog and I can’t help but second guess the decision given that physically, nothing seemed wrong. I could have brought her home and let her continue to pace around, feeling a fleeting moment of our bond on the occasion that she would walk up to me for a short time.

All that’s left is a lonely void that I feel myself falling into.

3 Comments
2024/03/28
12:12 UTC

60

My 4yr old Beatrice died suddenly last night.

We are in complete shock. She had a seizure and was fine for 15minutes and then she came to me for strokes and then not long after dropped to the floor and had a seizure that took her away from me.

I've been wracking my brain. She was fine nothing changed except her holding up her paw which started months ago and the vet said she was fine. She was happy loved her cuddles and ate a whole tin of salmon before she passed.

A part of me wondered if it was lily poisoning as I had a bouquet in my room on the top shelf.…way out of reach. I'd moved them yesterday to the kitchen temperaraly to transfer to throw them out as they wilted. She was sleeping in the living room most of the day. She didn't have contact as far as I'm aware but surely it couldn't poison her within hours...its so fast. I didn't realise how toxic these are to cats though. I have 2 others and they are fine….the vets were shocked and said poisoning usually shows signs beforehand.…shes had no signs of anything...i don't think they think it's poisoning...what do you think?

I'm just glad I was with her at the end. I said to her I was there for her when she was struggling. After she stopped the seizure she seemed to cough/choke/or try to gulp in air and she just passed. Just like that.…I asked her not to leave me but she left.

The pain in my heart is so unreal. Like a heavy pull. After 3 hrs of sleep I woke to her not on my bed laying next to me purring….I will miss you…I love you always and forever Beatrice the great ❤️💕

18 Comments
2024/03/28
11:05 UTC

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