Imposter Syndrome thrives on distorted thinking—minimising successes, magnifying failures, or comparing your behind-the-scenes struggles to others’ polished exteriors.

Objectively reviewing your achievements can challenge these mental distortions.

I wanna talk about one of the most common mistakes I see when people negotiate price.

Thinking it’s a wrestling match.

Trying to start a power struggle to knock them out and leave them bloodied on the floor, so they accept your price.

Ultimatums, threats, aggressive talk, using power to impose etc... None of that works.

I'm not saying you don't have to do it because it’s wrong. I don’t care about right or wrong here.

Don't do it because it simply doesn’t work.

Could they agree to your price if you do any of these? Yes, sure, maybe.

But you might damage a potentially great relationship or even a long-standing one, and they’ll make you pay for it in the future. Or they might just walk away and go with someone else.

Short-term gain, long-term pain. Strategies for short-sighted people with limited resources.

The key to negotiating price is getting the other side to accept your price.

They have to "buy" your price. Not feel like you’re "selling" it to them.

People want to buy. They don’t want to feel like they’re being sold to.

To do this, you have to make them feel like they’re always in control and leading the negotiation.

Always.

I’m new to the “study” of negotiation but am trying to learn more. As a business owner, I negotiate daily (salaries, proposals, vendors, you get the idea).

My style of negotiation has been one that prioritizes speed (many negotiations going on all the time) and keeping non-adversarial relationships (especially so with employees and vendors where we have long relationships ships)

The style is basically presenting what I’m hoping to get out of the deal and then asking them what they hope to get from the deal. Usually this face to face conversation is after a text-based “ask” from either me or them such as via email.

If the original ask from them is one I don’t find reasonable, I usually will straight up say why, focusing on the risks to me and asking either directly or indirectly how we could de-risk the deal.

This approach usually does a good job of putting us in a place of problem solving towards a mutually favorable outcome rather than an adversarial one.

Where I want feedback: To me this seems like a very rushed and perhaps half-baked approach to negotiation. It hasn’t necessarily worked poorly for me but I can’t help but feel there’s some optimizations that can be made.

I often get the feedback of “oh that was easier than I thought” which I have mixed feelings on. I wonder if they find it “easy” because I gave into their ask more than they really needed or if it’s because the conversation was effectively done in a positive and collaborative way.

Any thoughts?

Trump is speaking with SoftBank CEO and asks for $200B in front of reporters after asking for $100B. Anyone care to explain the negotiation tactics for Trump asking for $200B? Starts at 4:05. YouTube

Hi guys. I will negotiate for first time a department for renting. Do you have any real world advice?

Read enough on here to know there's some good advice around.

I'm not a great negotiator. To me makes sense to just say what I want/will accept, if you like it great, and if not we're done. This doesn't work great in the real world...

Now, in a contentious court situation. Other party has been very very aggressive and has the upper hand, but now they're supposedly financially exhausted from their efforts and saying they want to settle (they have a commodity I want, I hold the finances)

They reached out to me (outside of the lawyers) asking what I'm looking for (generally worded) to settle. There's only one offer I'll accept to settle (big ask), and I have the resources to continue a prolonged court battle (they supposedly do not). My lawyer and advisors all agreeing I should ask them for an offer and go from there. But given how aggressive they've been, and that they're low on money, I want to just say here's what I'll accept, take it or see you in court.

Why is my straightforward strategy, though intuitive, not successful?

What would you do,

I’ve recently started my watch trading venture and have been exploring used marketplaces to find individuals selling their watches. However, most of the sellers I come across are dealers who are usually unwilling to negotiate prices. My main focus is on consumers looking to sell their watches.

• first offer 750€ for a Tag heuer WAZ1110.BA0875

Listing price was 1200€ I offered 750€ Same models used on eBay were going for 600-900/1k€ Based on the conditions

-2nd listing price 2.2k € For a Tag Heuer WAY201T.BA0927

I offered 1750€ Then I told him the market value was around 1.5k-1.9k and my offer was good

But he the seller said he doesn’t wanna lower the price

Both watches were new and worn only few times

I did my research before giving them an offer which were a win for me and for the seller too and they offers where competitive too

Are my offers too low? Any way I can improve my negotiating skills ? Did I do my price research wrong ?

To me it looks like since they were already in loss they are trying to sell it for as much as possible by being firm to their prices

I see a ton of videos of Chris Voss explaining his techniques, but does anyone have a link to a good video of someone using the techniques successfully? I can’t find any!

Understanding the explanation of techniques is one thing, but I’d like to see them in real life.

Hi there, as the title says: I’m looking for experts in political or diplomatic negotiations to interview for my thesis. The interview will take place via Microsoft Team, will be recorded and will take 20-30 minutes.

If you are an expert in this field or know someone who is, please let me know. Thank you :)

I'm looking for an intermediate to advanced negotiation course and read about the Gap Partnership on Reddit along with that they are very expensive. Can anyone share how much you (or your company) paid for a training with them? And, if you have time, could you describe the experience?

Context: I 24M work as Product Owner in a Business that develops software or anything related. It is a rather small business and operation so I take on more resposability than I should and so does everybody else. We work as a team. The Company Owner or "my boss", he finds the clients and make the contracts. He negotiate with a Client, let's call the client Joe. He negotiated with Joe to "MODERNIZE" Joe's website, this is a keyword. Joe is a smart and seems to be an honest guy.

As I did my job, part of it was to show our progress to Joe, but every time i did a presentation Joe would get more and more upset. after the 4th presentation I can safely say his satisfaction with the project was 3 out of 10.

Obviously I did try to mend things and show how willing we were to change things to his liking and make sure everything developed was up to expectations, but the bomb dropped on the 5th presentation. I took some of his complaints to our devs, but knowing that it was most likely outside of the agreed upon work, we ended up making estimate of how much it would cost.

On the 5th presentation, I showed everything we were doing and after that I presented the price estimate to some of the requested changes. Since it was outside of the original scope. and right as I finished it, the bomb dropped. His words were " why should I pay extra ? This is INSIDE of the project scope, this is exacly why I'm unsatisfied, how can you tell me you won't do it unless I pay if I already paid for it ?" we talked a bunch and got on the same page.

Turns out my boss used the world "MODERNIZE" to tangle Joe, and made a contract that only included a "theme" change to his website, and some back-end work too. Joe is pissed and wants to cancel the contract.

This wednesday 4/12 there will be the next meeting, not sure if I'll be able to take a part in it.

Is there anything that can be done to solve this situation ? The only way foward I see is either loose the client or accept their demands and do the d*cking job properly like we were meant to do ? knowing my boss and his antics, if he loose the client I'm more than ready to quit. I simply cannot stay with this guy, it isn't the first client he bamboozles and I'm tired of having to keep his lies up. I feel like I'm draggin my whole team through the mud and I is against my morals to keep this up.

The first contracts I though there were somethings off about them, now this last one I can clearly see the malice through my boss actions and I want noone of it. I'm making my mind still, but I think I'll quit regardless of the outcome of this next meeting...

Business is Business but I choose to uphold my morals and ethic.

Hi, so this sounds crazy but I need help convincing my mother to let me go to the doctor for my iron deficiency anaemia. I’ve been really sick lately struggling with this deficiency (severe and constant fatigue, heart problems, cognitive impairment, fainting, weakness, postural hypotension, etc) but I’m struggle to muster up the courage to ask my mother if I can go to the doctor because I know her answer will be no- if it’s something we can fix at home with over-the-counter medication then she’ll take that over being safe and seeing our doctor to save money. I am all for saving money, but the thing is that the over-the-counter vitamin fizzies that my mom wants me to drink are too weak for me, I don’t know what it is but they just don’t work for me and my mother thinks I’m lying when I tell her that they’re too weak. I am planning on explaining my symptoms, my concerns and the long term effects that this deficiency can have on me, but I just need some help with the words. Please keep in mind that she is a very stubborn women and is very set in her ways (if any of the suggestions don’t work I will resort to makeup and rotting in bed- an act to make her actually worried lmao). Anything helps, thanks for reading! 🩷

I calculated that the price per square foot for that piece of land is about $8,000. I want to make sure the offer is appealing enough to get them interested in selling, but I’m not sure if starting at $10,000 would be too low. What do you all think?

Hi everyone,

As a long-time admirer of Chris Voss and his brilliant negotiation strategies from Never Split The Difference, I’ve read the book multiple times and actively apply his techniques in my communication. I also love the bite-sized insights he shares through YouTube Shorts and TikTok!

Inspired by his methods, I’ve developed a ChatGPT bot trained using some of the free PDF material from his work and additional guidance prompts. The bot helps rewrite emails and messages using Chris’s negotiation principles, like Tactical Empathy and calibrated questions.

I’d love your feedback on it. If you’re interested, let me know, and I can share the link (I want to keep this non-spammy). If you do try it out, a review or thoughts on how it could be improved would mean a lot to me.

Looking forward to hearing your thoughts!

I used it to write this post, here is what I typed first and I pasted what you read with no edits...

!Hey everyone, !<

!I have been a huge admirer of Chris Voss and his book, Never Split The Difference. I have read it several times and I use the quick tips from his YouTube Shorts and TikTok's. I have been using his style to rewrite emails and things and I think it is really helping.!<

!I built a ChatGPT bot, that was trained on his free PDF material and some prompts to give it guidance. I wanted to know if people would be willing to try it out and test it for me. I will post this link to it if requested, I don't want to spam. If you could try it out, and leave a review, that would be really helpful.!<

Hi Reddit,

I’m in a tough spot with my university and could really use some advice. I recently submitted a formal Title IX complaint because I believe I was discriminated against due to pregnancy-related needs. Long story short, I was penalized 25 points on a midterm exam for submitting it late, even though the delay was caused by a necessary medical appointment (an ultrasound). Despite notifying my professor in advance and explaining my situation, I was given no accommodations or flexibility.

I met with the professor to discuss the penalty, but she refused to reconsider and made some dismissive comments during the meeting. When I brought this up with higher administration, I was essentially told to work it out with the professor, which left me feeling unsupported. As a result, I had to withdraw from the course to avoid failing, which has delayed my graduation by an entire year.

Now, I’m petitioning to take a practicum course out of sequence to minimize the additional coursework required. I’m also hoping to negotiate with the university for some kind of financial compensation to offset the costs this situation has caused. These include transportation, childcare, and tuition for the extra semester I’ll need, as well as the income I’m losing because I can’t take on full-time work.

Here’s where I need advice: 1. Should I try to negotiate with the university myself, or would it be smarter to hire a lawyer to handle this? 2. If I go it alone, how can I make a strong case to persuade the university to offer compensation for these costs? 3. Has anyone successfully gotten their university to pay for these kinds of expenses, and if so, what worked for you?

I’m really passionate about completing my social work degree, and this whole situation has been emotionally draining and financially stressful. I want to handle this as effectively as possible without making the situation worse.

Any advice, tips, or insights would be greatly appreciated. Thanks in advance

Suppose I want to buy iPhone from China,how much VAT am I going to pay?

I'm going to some flea markets soon. Do you have any negotiating and bargaining tips, on how I can get the sales people to come down to a price I want?

Hi Everyone,

Looking for some guidance please.

We bought a house in 2016 which was a repo.

After the purchase the vendor's solicitor got in contact with us to say that they forgot to sell a small piece of land at the back of the garden to us. They offered it to us for £1 plus admin fees. We replied to them too late as by then they had returned the title back to the original owners.

The plot has a public path behind it and is small so can't be built on. Really it only has value to us, as it makes our garden bigger. We encompassed the land with a fence and have been using it as part of our garden.

Recently the original owner has been in contact asking for us to pay for the land otherwise they will put a fence around it.

We intend to purchase it from them but want some advice on negotiating a good price.

The originally purchased the price for £4000 in 2008. They are asking for a reasonable offer taking this into account and any fees. This may seem reasonable but we are the only person they can sell it to. However they might be difficult enough to fence it off....

Any advice is welcome!

Here is some ideas for cost saving and negotiation items.

Negotiation strategies

Hi all,

I am a fresher , just 1 year in the company. I got salary hike of 23%. Still did not receive the revised offer letter.

My peers and friends got 40% hike in other projects.

How do people actually negotiate in this scenario?

I know I have worked on lots more features and things compared to my peers, created entire test app for the directly used production ready products also.

How will you proceed in this scenario?

(Story) Was headed back from work yesterday. The roads were in blizzard conditions where a car veered over the median and collided head onto mine. (Discovered driver had bald tires, driver was young without license)

Checked in with driver, found out she was ok, but didn’t speak english. I Called Police/Towing, She called her family over. We used a translator to discuss the wreck. Police filed me not at fault, gave a case number and suggested talking with insurance.

(Details) Talked with Geico and found out I was covered for nearly everything… Except Uninsured motorist Property Damage… (Have Uninsured motorist which covers bodily injury but not anything else) After discussing the issue from all angles, the agent shot the truth to me straight and told me I may just be screwed…

Her Family at the crash offered to pay for my vehicle, but I fear the negotiation next morning knowing the minor leverage I feel like I have. Knowing much of this is unenforceable…

(Story) Talked with a close friend (33M) later that night and let him know I couldn’t make it on a trip we had planned together. I Let him know the details where he said (ignoring the trip) Have you contacted the father back yet?” I responded with how I wasn’t sure how to communicate effectively because of the language barrier. He volunteered “I speak Spanish, I could translate between you two would you like to call him right now?” I merged a phone call and negotiated to meet up with the father that night (This all happened same-day)

He drove me to the meet up spot where he helped me negotiate a rental car, payment for tow truck and a new vehicle with the father. He urged for me to solve the issue soon and not draw on issue longer than it has to before the other party loses interest. At this point I’m astounded with the help I’ve received from him. (He showed care for the family and made a good impression and helped me get a better offer than I thought I’d receive.)

(Details) I’m meeting with the father tomorrow alone with to go arrange for a rental car until the car replacement problem is solved. I’m meeting with the father again a some time later to decide between a couple similar car replacements. (Had a 2017 Hyundai Elantra)

Had put a lot of work to finish paying off my vehicle early and am not in a place to start off another big car payment right now

TL:DR At fault/uninsured motorist crashed into me and totaled my car. Looking for help to negotiate with motorist family to offset cost of the accident effectively.

I worry that I may get lowballed or ghosted. Any suggestions on further communication? Is there any leverage I have in this situation?

I just got a job offer for an editor position. The offer is for $74,000 USD.

• There is no annual pay raise or merit-based bonuses.
• My commute will be an hour and they don't allow you to work from home.

At my previous company, I got $73,700 per year with an annual KPI-based bonus, which was typically around $6,000 each year, so about $80,000 per year. I also got a 3–5% pay raise every year (3% if I did my job; more than 3% if I exceeded my KPIs). This was for a writer position, which is a step below an editor, which is what the new role will be.

So my base salary is about the same, except I got about a $6,000 bonus each year at my previous job and this job does not do bonuses. There's also no annual pay raise process, so I will be stuck at whatever salary I accept. The lack of formalized annual raise irks me.

The market rate for editor positions can be all over the place. The original job listing listed the pay range as $65,000–$90,0000. I don't think I can negotiate other things like PTO. They emphasized their great benefits at several points during the interview process, even alluding a couple times to how the benefits package compensates for a lower-end salary. In my opinion, the benefits are ordinary except for two things that standout:

• it's employee owned, after one year of employment you become eligible for the profit sharing retirement plan
• Tuition reimbursement after two years so long as the program has to do with your job. Your spouse and children are all eligible for tuition reimbursement too, and they'll pay up to the amount of whatever the University of Illinois is charging that year. So man, that is AMAZING for people who have kids! However, I am 36, single and already have a masters, so even if I were to meet someone and make a bunch of babies, I wouldn't be able to take advantage of that benefit for 20 years.

What is a reasonable counteroffer to their $74,000/year?

Hi All,

I'm seeking some insight on negotiating a salary with an internal promotion. I currently work at a large nonprofit/think tank as the Director of Government Contracts. I have recently been offered a promotion to oversee all institutional giving, which means I will be in charge of both the government and foundation funds my organization receives. With this title change, HR offered a 5% raise, which in my general research is quite low. The market indicates that a promotion with significant new responsibilities should be around 10-20%. This is my first time negotiating a salary with an internal promotion. Below is the body of the letter I intend to send to my boss--I would appreciate specifically on order and structure, but welcome thoughts on content as well!

1. Introduction: Thank you for the offer, my length of time at org and how much I enjoy working here/aligning with the mission. Note that you would like to discuss salary.

2. Justification

• Accomplishments in current role
• Increased responsibilities with new position (Adding foundations in addition to government contracts and supervising an additional person)
• Market Research for comparable roles culminating in a request for a 15% raise (rather than HR offered 5%)

3. Strategic Vision for the Role

4. Fundraiser Retention (my boss requested I put this in)

5. Closing

Thank you!

Basically I've just been saying "yes, I like it here" but what I'd rather say is "yeah work is work and I have to do it but I'm freaking stoked to come here rather than so many of the toxic workplaces out there. I'm being challenged in a healthy way, my boss actually cares about me, and I'm not being overloaded. It's fantastic here"

I just worry a little that if I'm overly enthusiastic they might feel like they can offer me whatever and I'll take it. That I'm throwing out my leverage of "being able to go somewhere else" if you know what I mean?

I think this is especially true for introverted individuals whose social battery wears down quickly.

You could have the best negotiation "technique" in the world, but it's so ridiculously easy to start making concessions once you start getting drained and are willing to say almost anything to just leave/get things over with...

What do you think?

Email magic from Never Split the Difference

Hi, I hope you’re doing well. I want to know how would you handle having to explain to a customer that your product will be ready to install in a time frame they consider unreasonable.

I’m a woodworker and my manufacturing process takes time, I don’t have items in stock since I work custom projects.

One of the most contentious points when negotiating is always the time. I don’t want to sound like I’m making excuses, I’d like to have a proactive and positive response that allows me to explain why a project will take X number of weeks.

Thank you

Im going into an interview this week for a Lead role in starting up Engineering support with SUE. Company has the work load and is subbing out the work for SUE. I had my first interview and all is good; and this next interview is more direct about expectations on both sides, and my assumption negotiations on pay/relo package.

I live in NE FL and own a home, and this job is in the Roaring Fork Valley of CO, but I’d be living in the cheapest area at first, and dealing with long commute ( non issue as my commute in FL isn’t much shorter time wise, and commute to go back home in Canada is the same if not more than the CO job).

What is a reasonable relocation package lump sum? Salary range is 120-140k. I’m aiming for 130k, and I’m keeping my house, but renting it to trusted friends at a slight loss. Selling my home is a non-negotiable for 12months as a safety net in case things don’t pan out.

Is 20-40k unreasonable? Just a U-Haul truck and fuel is 5,000$. Let alone first/last and security deposit on a rental home, transferring of vehicle registrations with impact fees, license, etc.

The job is needing very specific skill set and industry knowledge and the will to do ground up work which I am very qualified for, as I did it essentially for my previous employer. I am very comfortable where I am but I’m growing old of Florida and its climate both politically and temperature wise.

My bare minimum to even consider is 120k/10k relo, but my goal is 130k with 30-40k relo. Lump sum.

How unreasonable would It be ?