I know this is very niche, but looking for some insight. I’m getting a rhinoplasty July 5th and have been full time with my NF for almost a year. If you’ve gotten work done while nannying, how did you ask for the time off? Did you straight up tell them you’re having work done? How did the kiddo and parents react to the physical change? I’m debating whether to tell them I’m getting a nose job or just ask for the time off with no explanation (but I’m not sure that’s fair to them). Also worried baby won’t recognize me as I have a pretty unique nose. Thanks!

Currently looking for a live in nanny position. Any benefits I should be looking for and things I should be aware of?

I (18F) have been babysitting for about 4 years, only a few cases where I have been an actual nanny. My recent job started on Tuesday. 2 kids, 4-5 hours, $16/hour! The hours & the pay made me quickly accept this job. The kids aren’t a problem, they’re a little more hype than what I usually encounter but whatever, right? Everyday that I have been there the house looks as if a tornado came through, but the parent never specified about needing any light housekeeping. I felt good about the pay & the hours so I would do the extra cleaning anyway also as a means to help the parent. I was supposed to get paid today. NOTHING. Parent goes “my job messed up the payroll, I’ll have to pay you next week”. I don’t know how to feel about this especially since I would have to work a whole other week without having been paid. I had already made plans for my entire weekend. I just said “okay” because anything else I had to say wouldn’t have been respectful.

Does anyone else feel bad/weird asking for PTO? I get a decent amount of days, 12 I think, and I NEVERRRR take them because I feel like the family relies on me. I also get paid for their vacations, they take one in June and then one two weeks later in July. This summer I am also getting a few days off before their July trip because of when 4th of July falls. I know in my contract it states that I am to try/do my best to plan my longer vacations during their trips.

Some girlfriends of mine are trying to plan a trip to Iceland in October to explore and see the northern lights, life goal of mine as well. The problem with this is, northern lights are a fall/winter thing and my NF takes vacations during the summer. Last summer, me & some of the same girlfriends planned a camping trip to Banff and then the dates ended up not working out to happen during my NF vacation, so MB let me have an extra week in August (she was also stoked for my trip).

I put off asking until today, because I always feel bad asking to use my days off. My friends have been asking every few days if I have an answer yet. They also work in different career fields so asking/using PTO is a whole different ball game. You ask, get approved. Not like my job where it’s, I ask, NF works for a week or two or more depending to find coverage, and then gives me a yes or no.

Anyone else feel this way?

Hi!!

Mother’s day is coming up in a few weeks, and I wanted some advice of some cute/useful/ thoughtful gifts for my NP. We have such a sweet relationship together, and I love her daughter, and I just want to give her something sweet to celebrate the day. For context, we kind of have a mutual gift giving love language, this isn’t an abnormal dynamic thing for us. Please leave any ideas!! Thanks!!

A few years ago I worked for a NF with a very intense DB. I would notice him following my car during pickup, watching the monitor, and I’m about 60% sure a PI was hired to follow me. DB was intense with NK’s and they often confided and cried to me about their complicated family arrangement - which I won’t go into detail about.

A lot of people seem to think this behavior makes sense, to vet the nanny. However after several months, I think it’s uncomfortable and makes for a tense work environment. I’m curious to hear from other Nannies. What are your thoughts on constant surveillance?

Hello,

Can anyone recommend agencies in The Hamptons that provide on call pediatric care and need also nanny agencies.

Currently: Nanny works ~43 hours weekly

Preschool (2 days a week): Starts Tuesday, September 3rd Nanny works ~35 hours weekly

Just looking for advice! I’m job searching due to the drive (1hr and a half on “bad” days) and I’d like to find a more ideal fit compatibility wise. I’m required to give a 30 day notice per our contract. I have nothing in there protecting me. I’d like to make my last day the Friday prior to preschool starting because it just makes sense on both ends. I have an interview for a job that would start that same Tuesday (after Memorial Day) as his preschool, new position would prefer sooner. I’d like to give them a decent notice either as soon as I find out if I got the job or just something more reasonable than 30 days, but I don’t want to be let go before the notice is up (at least without pay). I have a good relationship with them and would like to give ample notice in case they ask I train someone etc. I can’t really afford to go without pay due to my current home build process. I haven’t used any PTO this year and planned to take the week before my wedding (August 17th) off since I will not be going on a honeymoon. So basically my options are I only give them 30 days and they can give me pay if they feel like it or I give them longer notice to be nice and risk getting screwed over. I wasn’t sure if anyone has ever written some sort of an agreement with the notice that both sign to protect yourself or if it’s kind of just up to whether they feel like paying you. Hopefully I provided enough information!

Hi guys, so I need some advice.

A month ago I started doing babysitting for a young child in France. The family chose me specifically because I am English with the idea that I speak English to the child. They both work from home for their own business but the child is obsessed with being around them (something they had warned me about). Over the past month, I have picked up on a few things which I would like advice about as I am new to this genre of work:

1. typically I work a 9-5 on the days that the child isn't in school. However, sometimes at like ten to five, both parents will tell me they're going out and then disappear for a couple of hours. I complained the last time this happened as I had been prepared to finish at 5pm and I had something planned after which I couldn't go to as there was suddenly nobody to look after the kid.
2. the child has behaviour problems and he is never corrected. They prefer to allow him to do as he wants rather than take the time to correct him and deal with his behaviour, something that im finding to be difficult as he bites me if I tell him he can't something (for example, he tried to snatch a kitchen knife out of my hands whilst I was cutting him some fruit)
3. The family like to travel for work. I say like because it's their business and they enjoy trying to market their work across the globe, which is great for them! However, they want me to now sign a contract forbidding me to leave until December 2024 because of their work schedule. Basically, the idea is that when they travel, I will live in their home with the child and their dog until they get back. they have told me they may have random dates added to their agenda where they will need to just suddenly leave the country without any prior warning.. something which feels strange to me as I also have a life outside of this job.
4. In my interview, they were told that I work a few evenings a week as a yoga teacher. They confirmed they would be flexible as they understood that this is my passion... So far, I've had to cancel a few classes because of them suddenly disappearing in the evening.

Anyway, the job is kinda well paid I guess (12 euros an hour) but I would just like some advice as im not sure if this is me not handling the job well or maybe somebody could advise me if boundaries are not being respected. Thanks in advance

I have a 5M and he loves to dress himself. This morning NM and I were talking about how he always has shorts over pants and it’s so cute! Then I bring him to school and he takes off his jacket and he’s still so puffy after taking off rain jacket. I ask him, “wow are you wearing two shirts?” And he looks at me and goes “no I’m wearing four!” He couldn’t decide which shirt he wanted so he just wore all of them.

i'm currently in the throes of knowing i need to leave this job but dreading the entire giving notice/job search/making decisions/uprooting to move to a place with a real nanny market so i can make a better wage *process*. so to keep spirits high, tell me your favorite things about being a nanny!!

i'll go first:

• pointing out silly, interesting things from the car. "cows!!" "look at that old fashioned truck!" "those woods would be fun to explore!" "what beautiful flowers!" "i like that house! it's so blue!" "FIRE TRUCK" i feel such genuine joy when my NKs get excited, or point out their own things, or agree with my assessment, or it launches them into telling me about some similar neat thing they saw and liked. like, the way pointing out an actively working excavator makes them flip out with delight just sends my serotonin right through the dang roof
• cuddling pets. i love their dog so much. he sits in my lap like a baby and runs to me when i arrive. i love him
• walks!! being outside!!! what other job allows you to just enjoy looking at ducks and picking up cool rocks??
• my NKs are a bit older and no longer into anytime cuddles, but when they've had a rough day or a meltdown or a sibling fight, and as we talk about it they just lean their head on my shoulder 🥺 and curl up against my side 🥺 sometimes they want to hold hands 😭😭😭
• when i try out a new recipe and they fuckin devour it
• random GIFTS and CARDS and DRAWINGS. i got a booklet the other day complete with NK's "author bio" and i about died
• *no business emails*
• my work uniform is jeans and a tee-shirt and/or sweater and some cute earrings. that's IT. i loved dressing up for the office in my 20s, but my god, the way i just THRIVE not having to worry about it anymore. also girls tell i'm cute whenever we're out, and if that isn't something you strive for idk what to tell you

now you!!

DB started of with an apology for the unusual request and said he wouldn’t ask this if he didn’t have to. Said you don’t have to supervise him or anything like that but to let him now either via text or when he comes home how much DB has drank throughout the day. According to him DB drinks a lot and he doesn’t want him drinking around NK.

Wtf was my first instinct I said I’m not sure and don’t want to be put in a strange position between them. But didn’t say no or yes. I never realized DB had drinking issues but I hardly see DB. He started working from home recently but 99% of the time he is either out or in his office.

A light moment after my rant yesterday lol

My NKs are both at ages where they are learning their own bodies and have a lot of questions about what is similar and what is different, so lots of questions and categorizing. They have 2 DBs, and G5 has asked why my body is different.

NKG5 asks me about boobs all the time lol

Well today, NKB1 looks down at my chest. I was sitting on the floor and leaning forward to grab their hairbrush. He grabs my shirt, points down and says very proudly and loudly:

"BUTT."

With the largest smile across his little face lol G5 and I burst out laughing, and bb joins in bc he has no idea what's going on, but he is here for it 😂

i’ve been feeling really low energy lately. i’ve tried to get more sleep, make sure i’m eating well, and just focus on my health in general yet i still feel tired constantly and have brain fog. im thinking its a result of burnout and pushing myself way past my capacity this past winter, but its been affecting how i show up with my NKs. i feel i’ve just been less fun and creative /: i used to do a bunch of projects & activities, etc and now i feel guilty because i just dont have the energy. i feel my NF is too nice to bring it up, but i’m afraid they’re also noticing the difference and disappointed in my work performance. any advice or has anyone dealt with a similar issue? thanks!

I'm starting a new job with NK3 and will have access to a car for lots of outings. What do ya'll keep in your cars for emergencies while out and about with the kids? All I can think of is a towel and some extra clothes and snacks? Child is also fully potty trained, so we won't need a 'diaper bag' but I feel like I'm forgetting things!

Our nanny of 4 years moved away recently and this is the closest to a truly broken heart I think I’ve ever been.

She was with our first(4.5 yr old) since she was 12 weeks old, and our 2 year old since she was a newborn.

We didn’t give her many responsibilities other than taking care of the girls, but she would go above and beyond and tidy up for us, run/empty the dishwasher, do the girls laundry, even fold our laundry if it was in the dyer (this made me uncomfortable because I don’t need anyone doing my chores but she insisted she loved doing it). I think we had the perfect arrangement that worked amazingly for both parties. We appreciated her so so much and I feel so lost without her. I’m not sure there is anything we could do to show her how much we love and appreciate her for everything she did for us, but I can only hope she knows how special she was. I don’t think we’ll ever find anyone like her again, she’s truly family. My girls ask about her and her husband all of the time and I usually just start to cry.

So… this is just a shout out to all of you amazing Nannies… we appreciate you more than you know. You are more important to us than you can comprehend and we’d be lost without you. Thank you for being amazing at what you do, and leaving a lifelong impact on families- especially the kiddos. 🩷

"LIVE-IN NANNY FOR 2 GIRLS/SINGLE MOM: I am looking for a live-in nanny for my two girls 2.5 and 3.5 years old. I am going through a hard divorce so it's super important for me to find a stable nanny for my girls during this hard time for them. I have a mother-in-law suite 1 bedroom 2 bathroom in my walkout basement. I just replaced the flooring and it has it's own washer and dryer. I also have a 5 yo border collie girl dog. She is super sweet and quiet (doesn't bark). I can pay $15/hr to start. I'm willing to negotiate a rent that works for you, approximately $1650/month including utilities. For more information about the position please contact me."

I literally cannot believe that this mom thought this was acceptable! Oh, let me pay you barely the minimum wage and charge you rent that's above the average. Luckily she's getting ROASTED on the Facebook group

Our wonderful nanny will be graduating in a few weeks with her masters degree and we’d love to get her a meaningful gift (aside from cash as we will be doing that regardless). She will be leaving us end of May as she begins to pursue jobs outside of child care so I’d love some ideas for goodbye gifts as well. We thought about doing a book with pictures of their adventures but she only takes picture of our kiddo and never includes herself in them so can’t do that unfortunately. We will also be giving a large bonus on her last day as a thank you.

I swear one of the most annoying things a parent can do is try and shorten a kids nap because they have no control over bedtime and their kids aren’t going to bed until 10:30. When my g4 was 3 and started giving them a hard time at bedtime, instead of them being more stern and having boundaries, they just decided to cut the nap. Now she’s turning 5 and it’s been two years without naps and guess what!? She’s still giving them a harsh time at bed. (Shocker) Do you think they learned anything? Nope. Now b2 is starting up. He naps usually 2-3 hours and is cranky when it’s a shorter nap. But now that he’s acting up they want to cut nap to one hour. The biggest kicker? When I babysit both kids are asleep by 7:30/8 even when b2 took a 3 hour nap. So literally both kids will just be getting less sleep overall because neither of them are going to go to bed earlier. Cool.

After moving states to be with my long distance partner I was having a super hard time finding a decent job. I had two really bad families but they at least paid well. It was super frustrating. But I finally found not only a good family but a fun family. My morning convo with Mb today made me realize I’m finally happy.

MB: what are your plans with NK 14months today? Me: going to the liquor store to stock up for my parents visit this weekend. MB: oh good. Can you take the card and pick up more of my favorite wine? Me laughing: absolutely

I don’t do personal errands often (and I’ve never taken NKs to the liquor store before) but they don’t care if I need to. I grocery shop for the kids so I just get my stuff at the same time. But it’s so nice to be able to just do what I need sometimes. I live an hour away from them in a rural area with no grocery stores so it’s helpful to be able to do this stuff sometimes.

So I’m moving with my NF of 3 years to Chapel Hill NC this June and I am doing some research about typical nanny rates for that area. I currently make above market rate with my NF for the area I live in, but the cost of living here is significantly cheaper. My MB wants to make sure my raise is at least the equivalent of what I make here so that my pay goes as far in chapel hill as it does here and I can afford a similar apartment in a similar location.

I’ve been with this NF since their first was 6 months old for 50 hours per week. I have 5 years of experience with full time nannying and like 9 years of experience babysitting and doing part time summer nanny gigs. I have a bachelors degree in an unrelated field and I have my CPR certification. I’ve traveled with this family multiple times and I’ve stayed overnight with the kids for over a week alone multiple times. I’d be caring for 1.5M for 50 hours per week and would be caring for 3F when she’s home from pre school. I will also be getting her ready for school and taking her there/picking her up. I do all child related housekeeping (laundry, organizing/cleaning their rooms, cleaning up toys, bottles, their dishes etc), meal prep for the kids, pack for the kids for vacation, make sure everything is stocked, and pretty much any other childcare related household task. I take the kids and attend several classes throughout the week with them too like music lessons or swim lessons. I will also be taking on house manager duties as well.

Hey guys sooo I need some advice… I recently told my nanny family I was interviewing for a new job (it’s April and our contract comes to an end in June). & she told me she would be doing interviews too, which okay whatever, have a backup plan for your kid I’m not mad about that. Well fast forward I come back to work after the weekend and they tell me they hired someone without even asking me if I got the job which spolier alert I DID. Anyways, things have been awkward lots of tension lately.. well today (Friday) they uninvited me to their daughters birthday party (who I have watched for the past 8 months). The husband basically said him and his wife don’t feel comfortable because there is going to be alcohol and they just think it’s inappropriate: I am 20 and have been to my old NF who also had alcohol there I would NEVER drink in front of them. I just feel so weird and uncomfortable because they waited until the day before to tell me anything. Also, they didn’t mention it until I asked if she needed anything for her birthday. I’m not sure if they are bitter from me getting a new job, if they just don’t like me, or what. It would’ve never been an issue if they hadn’t previously invited me but the fact that they invited me just to uninvite me after me getting a new job just makes me feel so uncomfortable and like it’s personal. Am I being dramatic, are they just trying to keep it professional? Or is this personal… because that’s what it’s starting to feel like. Thoughts, opinions?

Hi, i’m a 22y old student in the Netherlands. I recently found a new babysitting job and they asked me to also work as a nanny a few days a week when the mom works from home. They expect me to take care of their kid (11months) and clean and stuff. I am fairly new to nannying. I usually just babysit in the evening What do I need to know about being a nanny and about 11month olds? Thanks in advance! :)

Yep, Care.com is the worst. If they're not kicking you off without an explanation, they're letting people leave false reviews while still charging your bank account. Use this discussion space to vent.

I’m reaching out to get some advice and share a bit about what’s been going on with my job as a nanny. It’s been pretty rough lately, and I could really use your guidance.

First up, there’s this thing with my pay. Part of my deal for working here includes a monthly allowance for groceries and toiletries. Well, it was almost May, and I still hadn’t seen that money. I sent a polite message to both my employer and her husband about it, and all I got back was grief. My employer told me to stop bugging them about money or anything else personal, calling me annoying.

She also said if I say anything regarding something I need or about me or a problem or ask about money etc. Then I will be fired. She says she doesn’t care and I need to sort out my own stuff and stop asking things or bothering her and her husband…

Then there’s the whole mess with a plumbing issue. It happened in my part of the house, and I thought it'd be responsible to fix it rather than let it get worse. But when I brought it up, my employer flipped out. She told me to pay for it myself and to handle my own problems without bothering her. I mean, I can’t just let random people into her house without checking, right (proper etiquette to let them know if I just let someone come in their house)? Plus, it is not my house… my room and bathroom and everything belongs to them so they cannot expect me to fix something put of my own pocket (btw, the pipes had problems even before I entered the country so it is truly not my fault).

And just this morning, there was another blow-up about something new—packing a beach bag. She banged on my door during my off-time, tried to open it up. I put on a jacket and unlocked my door and then she threw the beach bag on the ground in front of me on my bedroom floor. Her problem was that it was not packed nicely. I admit, I could have packed it more nicely (this was an honest mistake I made). I’m not repeatedly making the same mistake; if I know something needs to be done a certain way, like keeping the fridge sorted or making sure this and that is washed and packed… then I take care of it. There was really no reason for her to react so extremely..

She keeps saying I’m on my “last thread” and threatens to fire me, which just makes everything more stressful. I feel like I can’t do anything right and my space and time aren’t respected. Plus she keep bad mouthing me, swears a lot. Calls me names when she is angry. She mocks my situation back in my home country and keeps mentioning how poor I am without the job - as a way to make me feel in debt to them and grateful that they employed me. She called me retards, slow, poor, uneducated etc. She bad mouthed my family who she also knows nothing about… saying how poor they are and this and that. Also, when she whispers in private with this aggressive tone “you better start looking for a new job” or screams “you are hanging on thin f-ing thread” or “you are replaceable, we have money and can get anyone new” then I just don’t know what to really say.

So, what do you think? How should I handle this? Any advice or resources you know of would be super helpful because I’m at a loss here and just want to make sure I’m not overreacting.

Thanks for letting me vent and for any help you can offer!

OH AND:

I can’t report her because I am technically on a tourist visa in United Arab Emirates and I have been waiting for 2 months for them to change my visa to residency/ work visa………… I am a day flight away from my home country and there is nothing waiting there for me, so I truly pray I will get work somewhere else, unless she changes.

And, they have had more than 13 or 14 nannies in a year (with temp nannies in between). All nannies left because they couldn’t handle the mom.

Oh, and I haven’t been compensated for any overtime. They said it is unnecessary and we shouldn’t count overtime, because it is “hard to keep track of times” because I am live-in so we should just ignore it.

I promise you, this isn’t even HALF of it. It is just draining to type all this. Maybe I will edit later and add more.

💭To answer questions currently being asked in comment section:

1️⃣ “In what country are you nannying now?” Answer: United Arab Emirates 🇦🇪

2️⃣ ”Who sent you there?” Answer: I was nannying in my home country through an agency and that is how I met them (they were in vacation there). Now I am nannying without an agency (independently) overseas at their house in UAE 🇦🇪

click here to check put a prev post of mine

What are some things they think are valid reason for letting you or another nanny go AND then I am genuinely curious at this… what is the most scary/horrid or appalling thing your host moms or dads have said to you or sone to you (or nanny friend)?

I am going through a crazy situation and I honestly just want to know whether I can relate with some nannies… I don’t know if I even have the strength to start typing on my end honestly. Maybe later I will gather my thoughts and share on here and just link this post to my new one.

Update: I got a little strength to post… check my new post here https://www.reddit.com/r/Nanny/s/o17OtoOjnj

I have been a nanny for several years. The past two years have been for WFH parents. I am going to be moving soon and therefore restarting the job search process. I prefer to work for parents that are out of the home.

That being said, how do you ask if parents WFH during the initial meeting/interview process? And how do you then reject the job? Do you mention it immediately once they answer where they work? Do you put in your job posting that you are not looking for WFH parents?

I charge a high rate and I know that I provide my best care when I don’t feel anxious having the parents around. I don’t want parents to think that I am lazy (or worse) for not wanting them in the home. It truly is just personal preference. Ty in advance for all the help! :)

Hi I am a nanny for a single mom who works nights. She has a two and three year old. I'm the first nanny that she's ever allowed to take the kids out of the house where she can keep an eye on them closely as she has cameras all over the house, but she trusts me whole heartedly. I recently came to aquire a second carseat and gotten the okay to drive them places as well We've walked all over around here (the farthest was two miles away) Something I really want to do is get them more time with other kids because social skills are one of the few developmental skills they do need more practice on. I usually don't even start working until 6/7, and I know most toddlers would be bedding down by that time. Their bedtime is 11 (cause mama needs her sleep when she gets home at 4 am). Any suggestions on where to go to find kids they could potentially interact with? My family is in South west Denver-Metro.

There is a trampoline park open in the evenings nearby that I thought might work, it just would suck if its empty (they would still love it so I probably will still do that)

I love libraries and go every other week to get them books to read and they really want to go (especially the 2 yr old the first thing she asks for when I get the is books). There is one nearby that closes at 8 so we will go one of the days I start 6 or earlier. Again worried that its going to be empty though.

4,098$ to watch the 5 children (mostly under 8 years old, no babies) for 3 straight days. Including nights at a flat fee of 250$.

The nanny's prices are:

21 an hour per child under 8,

15 per hour per child over 8

The mum claims it's 93$ an hour, but a comment says it's more like 57$.

The comments are full of people bashing her for being cheap.

I'm just agog she thinks one nanny for 5 little kids is a good idea. Also, I'm pretty sure daycare would be more pricy for that many kids.

edited for all my bad spelling

I am just curious if it is reasonable to ask to be paid more.

For context, I am a high school senior and I come in 3 days a week from 11-5. I skip school on days that I work, since my school doesn’t mind, but I’m very behind and 8/hr isn’t covering my weekly tuition. I took the job because the NF was perfect for my personality and the NK (three years old, only kid) is an angel!

Problem is, I work 11-5 at the latest. DB is military (I drive 30 minutes to get to their house on base lol) and sometimes gets home early, but I haven’t been there 11-5 ONCE! He usually comes home around 2 or 3, so I’m only getting around $120 a week. Also, when he counts my hours, he does half hours, too; last week I was paid for 14.5 hours.

I have childcare experience (in nurseries and in teaching internships, this is my first time with an individual kid) and I’m Child & Infant CPR/First Aid AED certified. She’s potty training and I cook and clean (light cleaning) and take care of their dog.

When we negotiated rates MB explained that she isn’t getting paid for the first 6 months of her job and that she could only do 8/hr. Unfortunately I was too willing to empathize and too desperate for an arrangement that wasn’t unreasonable for my school schedule.

I understand that since I’m still in HS it’s not like they’re going to have to pay me a living wage, but my family’s financial situation is… unique… and you would think people would notice that if a seventeen year old is skipping school to go to work, there might be a reason lol

I love my job so much that it might as well not be a job, but I do wonder sometimes if maybe there should be a discussion about at least the regular hours thing. I quit my waitress job because I wanted to stop having to guess what my paycheck was going to look like lol. I’m probably being unreasonable but I wanted to ask the professionals (y’all!)

Am I being unreasonable? If not, I wouldn’t ask to get paid more if they didn’t offer, but I would for sure ask to get paid the whole 6 hours that I agreed to work and have cleared out my schedule for, even if DB comes home early. Either way, I don’t plan on quitting because I love it, I’m just wondering if I should be paid more. I love the NF and it’s all very laid back. I don’t blame them or anything, this is their first time having someone other than family watch their kid!

TL;DR: I am 17 and skipping school to nanny for 8/hr. DB comes home randomly early most days so I never know what to expect for scheduling or pay. Should I ask them about it?