It's one thing to vent, another to have violent posts.

r/misophoniasupport Rules

1. Be kind to each other.
2. No directly violent posts or comments.
3. Post titles cannot contain triggering words. (For example, no onomatopoeias.)
4. Don't be a doctor.
5. Do not make stereotypical or judgmental remarks about a group of people.
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I’m not sure why but it always seems really fake and over the top, and like they deliberately wrote it into the script.

I’m decided to post my issue here because it’s some community I feel I could relate to at some level. Basically my issue is that whenever I am quietly doing a task or riding in a car I hear my little brother talk and its only him but his voice annoys me so much it makes me go insane. It’s just him I have the issue with though. Whenever I’d loose my headphones I could barely even be in the house without yelling and crying about how terrible he sounds. Also it’s worse when he sings. I just want to get help on why I’m experiencing this pain with only one person.

i have been struggling with misophonia since i was around 6 years old and it has completely isolated me from everyone in my life. i have had to cut people off and not spend time with people that i genuinely love and care about because the disorder runs my life at this point. along with misophonia i also have bipolar disorder. it’s actually insane how the two can work together. when i am feeling manic i usually am more quick to anger when someone is making a noise that bothers me. as opposed to when i am depressed or low in general i tend to hurt myself and almost choose to stay where i am to make myself more miserable. my family knows about both and i am medicated for bipolar but obviously as you guys know there’s not much medication wise that can be done for misophonia. i have never felt heard since it first started and my family has honestly made the process much harder for me. my boyfriends family is a whole different issue however. they are not the nicest people in the world and although his mother has really come to understand my problem, a lot of his family can be so rude to me because of it or make noises on purpose to bother me. this is actually my first post on reddit and when i found this group i was stunned by the amount of people in it solely because i have literally never met in my day to day life someone who has misophonia. i honestly dont expect much from this post but even just having a group of people like this who understand my feelings and validate them is like the best thing lol.

So I have a manager that is constantly crunching ice. It’s usually not a problem unless I’m working drive thru where she goes back to get it and I am right by her. It makes me angry and I don’t know what to do. She is a very loud outspoken person, and she doesn’t like me because I don’t bend to her every whim. I feel like I can’t say anything. Anytime I’ve expressed my misophonia issues in the past I always get backlash. People telling me it’s my problem and getting mad and defensive. Mostly because my triggers are people chewing and breathing loud. I understand that this is a problem in my head, and it doesn’t affect anything else. But it’s still driving me crazy. I don’t know how to cope with it besides walking away.

I dont really know how to explain it but I feel like my brain makes up noises that I can't stand. For a bit of context, I cannot stand snoring and it literally makes me have extreme symptoms of misophonia.

I think my head makes up these snoring noises that aren't actually there. My parents snore and I can't stand it but sometimes they aren't loud and I can't hear them but then suddenly I can as I'm trying to sleep. I sit up to listen and I can't hear it, I lay down and and it happens again.

I thought it may be myself snoring so I held my breath to see, it wasn't that because I could still hear it. Idk if it's related to misophonia, I've googled it but I don't know how to word it. The only thing close to what I think it could be is EHS but that's loud noises so I don't think it is.

I feel like I'm going crazy (I probably am) but if someone knows what it could be or also struggles with the same sort of thing please help.

Forgot my headphones at home today. I have to sit next to this guy who is constantly eating something. Just anything. And he's an extremely noisy eater. He'll suck nonstop on a mint for 20 minutes and it's loud as shit. And just when I think he's finished, he'll pull another mint out of his pocket and I'm back to square one. I cannot stand people like this. I know it's not his fault I'm so sensitive to sound but that doesn't make me any less annoyed. I would ask my teacher to move seats but he hasn't been at school ever since he changed the seating arrangement.

how to deal with the anger?

so, this is my first time sharing about this so i hope someone can understand. i've had struggles with misophonia my entire life, but I only found the term for it about 5-6 years ago (I'm 22.) and I was so happy to find there was actually a name for it bc nobody ever understood what I was talking about. I've been very open to everyone in my circle and let them know if you're around me please do not chew with your mouth open or chew anything hard/loud. well, the actual story starts here. my mom is an AVID ice eater. like no exaggeration, ALL day EVERY single day. ice is the WORST trigger for my misophonia bc it doesn't matter how hard you try not to, it is so loud and it sounds like she's breaking her teeth all day long. i have tried SO many times to kindly explain all of this to her. explain that i can't help it makes me so angry and disgusted. she thinks i'm singling her out and just trying to "be disrespectful and start an argument." she has an iron deficiency and says that she can't help but want to munch on ice all day. which is fine, i understand that. but wouldn't it be respectful on her end too to try and not do it while she is sitting right next to me? she doesn't care about it triggering me at all, yet the second i just literally can't handle it anymore, and either cover both of my ears or just completely leave the room, she gets mad and says i'm being rude. i try wearing headphones while she's doing it, but she also talks to me a lot so i have to leave one out always, and bc it's so hard NOT to focus in on it, the headphones do absolutely nothing. i can still hear it like it's right in my ear. or she'll be standing right next to me talking, WHILE she is chewing, and then the second i either stop listening bc i CANT, or tell her to please stop while she's talking, i'm rude!! it pisses me off so bad to the point i want to rip my hair out (ik that sounds psycho but im sure one of you will understand lol.) so i guess im just asking, how do i deal with the anger of it since it'll clearly never go away? moving out isn't an option bc one, im saving money right now and its so convenient staying with my parents. two, apart from this situation, my parents are perfect. i dont want to not be with them right now. but its also very hard to sit in the same room with someone who is constantly doing the ONE thing you've asked them not to a million times, and you're not allowed to react to it or you're disrespectful. nobody even knows how hard it is for me every day to HOLD my anger from it inside bc i quite literally cannot express it to anyone around me. i have more mornings that her ice chewing is the first thing i hear when i wake up than not. it drives me absolutely insane. i feel like i can't get away from that sound. this is the only issue me and my mom have. but its gotten to the point i literally just can't say anything anymore or it'll turn into an argument. i just have to leave the room and pray the next time i go in there she'll have ran out and forgot to fill her cup back up for awhile. which is usually never, and i've noticed it's added some distance to us bc since she is literally ALWAYS chewing it, i always feel angry around her. i hate it. i hate that i can only be in a good mood with my own mother when she's not chewing ice. it sounds so f*cking stupid put like that, i know. trust me, i know. 🙃it makes me feel so guilty and shameful of myself that it makes me that angry. so if anyone has any advice on how they cope or somehow just get over it, please help! she just doesn't understand it has nothing to do with HER, it's the stupid ice.

Does anyone else get annoyed hearing people’s muffled voices talking outside their window? 🤦🏼‍♀️& you have to immediately turn on your white noise machine or put in earplugs to drown it out?

Idk how relatable this will be, but does anyone else feel an immense amount of guilt telling other people about your misophonia? and asking for people to be considerate of that fact, etc

I guess it stems from the constant gas lighting I recieved growing up over it (it's Impossible to hear, you're making it up, stop being a baby, etc etc). For example, I wasn't allowed to leave the dinner table when chewing and breathing bothered me as a kid, I was forced to sit there and endure it, often breaking down crying in the process.

Since it's been instilled in me that my condition is an inconvenience at best and actively harmful to my relationships at worst, I feel extremely guilty every time I tell someone I'm struggling with it. I constantly feel like they're gonna snap, or tell me to stop being so sensitive, or that I'm being unreasonable and I shouldn't have brought it up in the first place.

It then causes me to backtrack a little bit sometimes, which accomplishes nothing but making me suffer through the sounds more often and confusing/angering the other person, accidentally manipulating them.

just wondering if anyone else has had a similar experience, and any advice on dealing with the sheer guilt.

My headphones don’t block out the noise in my dorm and all the “quiet spaces” reserved for studying at my dorm and school are filled with loud groups of people who stay there until after midnight. I can’t stand all the voices and footsteps. In class I’m always seated extremely close to people who swallow, chew and breathe super loud and I’m not allowed to wear headphones. I literally want to freak out

Apologies for the length. TLDR at the bottom.

I am the partner (F26) living with quiet BPD. My bf (M33) lives with Misophonia. This is not a rant, I'm only reaching out to this community because I think the members here would best be able to explain Misophonia perspectives on a calmer level than what my partner is capable of doing at this point in time. Since I'm not living with misophonia, please let me know if there's something I said that is offensive, because I don't mean to be hurtful at all.

For simplicity sake, my Borderline Personality condition makes me VERY sensitive to rejection, perceived abandonment, abandonment, and yelling/being blamed for something. When I mean quiet BPD I mean that I take things out on myself than onto anyone else. I still have a hard time regulating my emotions and from the outside, I react incredibly strongly for what seem to be the most minor of situations. If I drop food on the floor, I will feel the exact same grief/sadness/tears you'd probably feel when someone you love and were close with dies. My emotions sometimes do not align with the facts, I'm rather aware of this. But the pain is still serious and real.

Anyway, we are stressed about moving apartments, logistically and financially. I've been slaving away trying to find a place for us since he works a lot. But I'm very anxious so I bite my nails, bad habit, I know. My bf has also been taking out some of his apartment moving/work stress on me which doesn't help my anxiety. He is triggered by my biting nails as example. Although I do sympathize with his misophonia and don't blame him for having it, he sometimes reacts to triggers by yelling, slamming things, and sometimes making snide comments about me biting nails. I don't appreciate any of that. It then triggers ME because then I feel like I'm being blamed/shamed for something that is relatively normal for a human to do and that I'm obviously causing his suffering when thats the last thing I want.

When I cannot regulate and just try to cope, I cry--a LOT. I am soft spoken naturally too. But my soft-spoken nature and my crying sounds triggers him again. And it's then this never ending cycle of us triggering each other. My mental illness tells me that I am not allowed to be a human because whenever I do human tendencies, it seems to causes my bf to suffer, even though I know that's not the message he wants me to know. But it's just so hard because I can't take the yelling, comments, and slamming--it makes me feel like I'm a bad person.

I know I'm only really explaining my side, but I am on this subreddit because I am asking the community of any resources, advices, techniques, for how to manage the sound triggers, whether you are a misophone living alone but more-so if you're living with someone else. I'm trying my best to accommodate my bf but please let me know if there's certain things that you guys would want a non-misophone to know about. But I can only accommodate to so much..

Before I forget to mention, we live in a small studio in a big city, so although the space size is the cause of a lot of our stress, we at least know moving to a bigger space would help a bit. But it will be a few more months until then, at least.

​

TLDR; I live with mental illness where my ways of coping with rejection/pain trigger my bf's misophonia. He reacts by yelling, slamming things and not saying nice things. His reaction to his trigger, triggers me and my illness goes haywire. And then everything repeats. I would live any advice, help, suggestions for our living situation. We live in a studio but are trying to move to bigger space, but until then...

​

I live on a top floor apartment because I learned my lesson with my first apartment on the bottom floor lol. But here comes by downstairs neighbor blasting music 24/7, fighting and yelling, a bunch of domestic abuse and it drives me crazy because management wont doing anything about it. Ive found a way where if I wear my ear plugs, a sound machine playing water sounds, my alexa playing white noise and 2 large fans running I dont hear anything. But my problem is that I cant stop listening for the sounds😩. I’ll randomly get the urge to make sure its not happening even when I cant hear anything with all the sounds I have going on. I will literally turn everything off and sit on the floor and listen for it. And then sometimes it is happening and I get so mad but I could have just not checked and I would be fine and I know this but I cant stop. Has anyone else ever experienced this??

Starting to book interviews for season 8 in April!

Each episode is a casual and authentic conversation between two misophones, myself and a guest. We touch on our experiences through life and how they affect us and the people around us.

Feel free to pick a time slot at the link below:
https://www.misophoniapodcast.com/be-a-guest

Apartment living is torture, these neighbors have loud dogs AND are constantly opening and slamming their doors.

Sniffing and loud breathing are one of my biggest triggers. 4/7 of my classes have both. I don't understand why it is so hard to just blow your nose. There is a kid in my second period who is so sick that I can hear him breathing and he sniffs SO loud every five seconds. Pretty much everyone in my first and second periods are sniffing one after the other or at the same time. It got so bad that I started clawing at my face and neck because there was no way for me to block out the sound. I was on the verge of tears, so l decided to go into the bathroom to calm down and you wouldn't believe what happened!! Another person sniffing and breathing like a pug that ran a marathon. So I went to see my guidance counselor and didn't have to go back to class. However, my 4th period is the same. This one girl breathes like she's snoring on top of the other two mouth breathers that I sit next to. They sit in the middle of the classroom. I have to sit in the hallway in my third period because it's that bad. Now I might have to do that in fourth period too. It has made my life so difficult as if it wasn't hard already with my ADHD and I don't know what to do. I'm not diagnosed with it but l've been living for as long as I can remember. I don't know what to do in classes where I can't block it out. I just want to cry, scream, and rip my hair out. My mom doesn't understand either. I'll text her when I'm on the verge of tears and she just says "I'm sorry." I don't know what to do.

So our office admin is super kind and keeps snacks stocked for us. This week, she picked up these granola bites. Holy cow. I have to shove my earphones in as far as they can to cover the noise.

Hey, everyone. I need your help, please. I need to make a list of 15 coping mechanisms for misophonia. So far I only have 10 and some are repeats. I just don't have that many coping mechanisms. For context, I am 17 and going on a trip soon with a group that is not my school but is affiliated with my school. Since it is not my school, my 504 doesn't apply. If it helps, do have misophonia to the point where its majorly disabling to me. I can hardly control my actions and have a meltdown if its triggered too bad. This hasn't happened since I was 15, so I don't anticipate it happening again anytime soon.

They won't let me wear headphones, or even go, for that matter, unless I give them a list of 15 coping mechanisms in the order that I do them, with headphones being no less than number 10, and leaving the room being 15. I know that this is probably illegal of them to request, under ADA guidelines, but I'll worry about that later. (They also told everyone on the trip that I'm trans, asking if they're okay with being in close proximity to a trans person, but whatever, again, I'll worry about that after the trip.). I am leaving tomorrow and they just told me today that I have to make the list or else I cannot go. Since it is an exclusive, once-in-a-lifetime college tour of like my top 10 choice colleges, I have to go.

So far, I've only thought of nine, and several are repeats, because I don't have 15 freaking steps that I follow, I just have like 5. Here is what I have so far:

1. Plug my ears
2. Take a deep breath
3. Close my eyes
4. Take another deep breath
5. Stim
6. Put on my headphones
7. Stim again
8. Take a deep breath
9. Leave the room, take a brief stroll, then return

I don't know how else so convey "stim" in a better way, since they already think I may be too "irresponsible" to go, do to my misophonia, anxiety, and tendency to stim. I know, probably illegal under the ADA, but whatever, I can deal with that later.

If anyone can help me with this, I would appreciate it so much. If you can even think of one thing I can put, I would be so grateful. Thank you so much for your help, and I hope you all have a great day.

(PS, I also posted this in r/misophonia, if it looks familiar.)

Hello! I'm graduating high school in a few months, and I was wondering what kind of jobs I should look for and avoid to help work around my misophonia. (My main triggers are sniffling and chewing)

The grocery store I used to work at was loud as hell. The cash registers beeped constantly, the music echoed from the speakers and all you could hear were shopping carts and children screaming. It was heaven. I couldn't hear most trigger noises over the chaos, and the only ones I did hear were either from the customers, or the bagger helping me. Interacting with customers all day was terrible for my anxiety, but it was a good tradeoff from crippling misophonia.

But long-term, I'm obviously not working in grocery stores my whole life, and working in an open office space where headphones are banned sounds like hell on earth. I've heard people mention construction in this sub, but I'm farrrr too weak and unfamiliar with tools to even consider that.

What kinds of jobs do you all have, and are they good/bad for your misophonia? What would you suggest?

I share a room with my mom and she snores which drives me crazy. i get so angry and filled with rage, i end up sleeping on the couch but in the morning or the next day i feel really guilty for getting angry. even when my brother eats near me and i have to grab my big headphones out of anger, i feel guilty later on.

if you relate, how do you deal with this?

I literally cannot stand it, and everywhere I go there are MULTIPLE people hacking at 30 second intervals, sends me into a silent rage.

Dear community

We understand that participating in research questionnaires can sometimes feel like an overwhelming task. Some of you may have reservations or concerns about trusting researchers with your personal experiences. However, we want to assure you that your contributions are incredibly important and can make a real difference in the future of misophonia research.

We understand that living with these conditions can be challenging, and we recognize that sharing your experiences may not always be easy. But it's essential for us, researchers, to understand the full spectrum of these conditions so that better strategies for diagnosis and treatment can be developed. Your insights are key in helping achieve this goal.

By participating in our questionnaire, you're not only sharing your story but also helping to shape the future of research in this field. Specifically:

🤝 Reaching Consensus on Definitions: Currently, there's no consensus on the definition of conditions like misophonia. Thus, people treat it differently or do not treat it at all. Your participation allows researchers to gather a variety of experiences, making discussions that can ultimately lead to a clearer understanding and consensus on these conditions within the health professinal community easier.

💡 Improving Treatment Strategies: Understanding the complex experience of auditory conditions is essential for developing targeted and effective treatments. Your insights help researchers identify specific symptoms, triggers, and patterns, laying the foundation for more personalized and effective treatment approaches.

We want to contrubute to misophonia/auditory sensitivities communities so individuals with auditory conditions feel heard, understood, and supported. Your participation is crucial towards achieving this vision.

Also, we would like to ask you to share this questionnaire with your friends and family who do not experience any auditory conditions so we can compare their expereinces with yours.

Ready to participate or know someone who might be interested? Simply go to

https://www.psytoolkit.org/c/3.4.6/survey?s=ZQDvF

or scan the QR code from your phone.

If you have any questions you can contact us via email

Silvia Estela Morales Gutierrez: sies0007@umu.se

Fay van Tussenbroek: fava0016@umu.se

Thank you for your support and participation!

Fay and Silvia

The person that I worked with was a nice and knowledgeable individual.

Unfortunately, he talked like this, "Soooo, Cleatus, how are things going with that?" and "Ummm, ya that is nice."

It kind of irked me a little bit. Unfortunately, if I was super stressed I would get annoyed by it.

I have to stay with my mother for an extended period of time and I hate her so much. She annoys me with almost everything she does, but the worst is the things she does relating to misophonia.

Biting her nails, chewing gum oh god, chewing with her stupid mouth open, even her putting her nails near her face freaks me out and makes me so gosh darn angry

It’s so hypocritical cause I got beat by her for biting my nails and chewing with my mouth open as a kid. I stopped and suddenly the noises were horrid.

I have noise cancelling headphones, but

1. I need to respond and listen to people
2. I can still see their mouths and my mind fills the noise in? It doesn’t but it’s still aggravating watching them chew.
3. I can’t wear headphones anyway near her or she’ll get extremely mad and I need to stay with her for visa reasons and because being poor isn’t fun.

I have no idea what I should do.

• Being high 24/7 seems nice but that isn’t a long term solution and a unhealthy dependence on anything is just sucky.

• I workout out all the time and while my stress is not the best, I’m working so hard to get it lower.

• I eat extremely well, I see food as nutrient stats not just for pleasure.

•I do yoga and meditation daily and try and go outside as much as I can. (I have been struggling and it seems my misophonia gets worse when that happens.)

I’ve looked up everything and I feel like I’m hitting a wall. I won’t be able to do so many things because of this stupid disability and I can’t stand it!

I can’t even run 5ks for funzies cause everyone chews gum and you know their not chewing with their mouth closed either.

Anyone got any suggestions? I’ll take anything right now

Has anyone done any sort of therapy that works for specific sounds? Backstory: we live in Mississippi and while I’m sure there are good folks here, the bad rap Mississippians get is for the most part true. I cannot go outside my house because of the constant dog barking. And it’s not one neighbor, it’s several. When I asked them to please keep their dogs quiet they told me to go back where I came from and move (the type of people I’m dealing with). I have three dogs and I never let them bark I always bring them back inside. We can’t afford to move, we are here for work, but I’m severely depressed. I can’t even go outside. Code enforcement, animal control, police refuse to do anything. It’s so common here because people just do not have common courtesy. The dog whistle devices won’t work because the properties are too spread out here. I wear AirPods but I’ve abused them to the point I have tinnitus. Regular AirPods don’t work. I’m hoping there is some sort of therapy I can do so I can tolerate the loud noise better. I have a suspicion I might have hyperacusis as well. This is the first time I feel like things will never get better and there is nothing to look forward to unless we find a way to move, which isn’t likely for at least 3-5 years.

My stepfather was an awful jerk.

I find every sound he makes to be disgusting, irritating and if repeated, rage inducing. Much more so than anyone else I’ve encountered.

Does anyone else find that their sensitivity is increased if they have negative emotional history with that person? Or current, active dislike?

Yesterday, my partner and I stumbled across misophonia and I've been googling a lot since then.

My partner hates my favorite band, Coheed & Cambria due to the lead singer's voice. There are a few songs they can stand, but if he hits a certain register with his voice (higher notes) my spouse says it physically hurts and asks me to change the song.

I thought they just disliked the band, but I now understand that this is something more. We did find bands with similar sounding lead singers whose voices make them react the same way.

I see a lot of misophonia is related to noises, but I've seen a handful of comments regarding people feeling a certain way about songs.

I'm doing my best to avoid listening to the band and plan to out together a Playlist of spouse approved Coheed songs.

I'm seriously getting to the end of my rope. I can't afford therapy, and the "therapists" I have been able to afford through specific channels are a joke. I don't know anyone else in my real day to day life that suffers from misophonia.

I wanna start with my biggest triggers. Anything visually or audibly related to mouths absolutely destroys my ability to focus on anything else or function normally.

I love animals and have a dog and 2 cats, but the slightest sign of them licking themselves or me or anything else drives me into an uncontrollable rage to the point where if I wasn't aware and in control of my problem I think I'd become violent.

Any time a person near me puts their hands even near their face my hairs stand on edge and I snap. It's like it sends and instant jolt of cortisone through my body and I want to explode.

I hate this about myself. I'm constantly on edge and aware of everyone and everything around me. It's gotten to the point where if my wife goes to pick something out of her teeth while I'm driving I get distracted enough to crash the car.

I keep this completely to myself except for the people closest to me. They understand, but I can't help but feel like an overcontrolling asshole anytime i ask someone to stop or I leave a situation.

I'm just desperate for advice. This, on top of my other OCD symptoms is becoming unbearable. Has anyone here had success controlling their misophonia?