A little over a year ago, I made a post telling the events of how I (25M) left my childhood home after my step dad passed away and my sex offender older "brother" moved back in. My mother acted like she was on my side and then blamed me for him walking out and becomubg homeless after she made us have a family talk and how I didn't accept his apology. I ended up moving into my current partners house with their family.

Throughout this entire year, my partner has been rather neglectful to my feelings, verbally abusive and has even punched me in the face twice. This has been almost a weekly occurrence of me getting yelled at, being called stupid, and being ignored. Few days ago, my friend texted me asking for help and at the time i was asleep. They later texted me that they were in the hospital because they attempted suicide and I spiraled for the rest of the day over it cause I could have lost them. I ended my texting my partner about it and they ignored it and went on about their day at work instead.

I've starting to become distant towards them and began to feeling myself fading away. All I've done was try to keep myself together specially when I've pretty much lost my entire family due to the past. I want to feel like I matter and that I'm not someone toy or punching bag. I'm tired of crying daily from how fucked my life became and I just don't have much I can really hold on to anymore. My last ex felt like the only good thing that has happened in my life that I don't want to keep coming back to reminiscing with, cause she will never talk to me again. But my head keeps playing memories with her and it just hurts more and more. I just don't know what to do anymore. I feel alone.

I really liked the book "Fierce Self Compassion". The ability to hold righteous or "constructive" anger in life is needed every day. It can be expressed healthily through good boundaries, sticking up for self, speaking up, etc. Keeping this in balance with compassion is the key to be a healthy anger. This knowledge can be very helpful for anyone but even more so when someone is an abusive situation: anger, sexual, physical, etc.

One knock on the book is that it is only for women. Yes, women can be abusive as well. I know men who have been in consistent harmful situations inflicted by a women using rage, dehumanizing remarks and much more. Just because they are a man doesn't mean they don't have feelings and don't show similar signs of withdrawal, fear and unsafety. It may be even more so damaging in some cases, as society doesn't accept that men can be abused and it is scoffed at much more, ignored and invalided on every level!!! Any abuse intentional or not, is not okay.

i was adopted when i was five and up until the start of highschool was molested every single morning before school by my adoptive dad. every single day. even some nights while watching movies. i also remember one vacation to great wolf lodge (i really want to create better memories there.. it was still my favorite vacation spot.. still is..) and being woken up to stroking his.. thing.. as I got older I didnt really understand my emotions. i was extremely mentally unwell and wanted to kill myself all the time. i constantly had panic attacks every single night (24 now and suffer from chronic heart palpitations-up to 150bpm-and fainting). i was absolutely miserable and acting out. i closed off my entire adoptive family to the point where today I dont consider anyone i grew up with family (creating my own). it really fucked with my sense of family and home.

im a lot better now but still havent gone to therapy for any of this. though i keep thinking about when i was in highschool and finally told my adoptive mom what happened.. her words still sting like ice down my back. that there wasnt anything we could do. that we wouldve been homeless without him. that “she went through it too” which as fucked as it is I find so hard to believe because then.. how could she have let it happen to me? apparently she always wanted a daughter.. bought and paid for me.. just to basically neglect me.

in my pov i never received the love and care i needed. the extensive therapy and connection my records stated i needed. i had RAD as a kid and the only form of love i ever received was toys and a roof over my head. they had a biological son. he is special needs so of course he got all of the attention. and kisses. hugs. Apparently because i was a kid and never asked i didnt need them.

i have so much more to vent that i just cant remember atm but.. i needed to finally get this off my chest. i always planned on writing a book but everythings such a mess up here. Idk how. im lost. i feel alone. and im sorry for my shit grammar.

&honestly, i need to know.. am i the only one who wouldve been homeless (which btw is that not just exaggerated?) just to protect my child? i wouldve moved heaven and hell. no matter how impossible it may have seemed. so why didnt she?

I always thought being in a crowded space nobody would touch me and if they did there would be repercussions.

Once I was groped at a busy subway station when I was 19. The man looked way older than me and he left and then came back to me and tried to say something to me. I asked him to stop and he left again. My grandma stood in front of me and glared at him when he was approaching me for a third time now with a second man. I looked up and all these people were watching me and not a single person said anything to him or me.

As I got on the bus I thought to myself it was my leggings. I felt like I was naked and like I was so stupid for wearing tight leggings. I thought everyone must have thought it was my fault despite knowing how wrong this rhetoric is for a while.

That day I learned that the world might not help you when you need it. It’s a horrifying thought. I have since vowed to myself that if I ever see a similar situation I have to do something even if I’m scared. I don’t even blame those people. I think I may have frozen too if i saw it not having this experience, but now I know how unsettling it is to be that woman.

My name is Sarah Silberman, I am a Criminology and Criminal Justice Doctoral Candidate at the University of Maryland who researches sexual violence, and I am currently recruiting for an interview study on sexual misconduct in academia. For IRB approval, please see see my department page here: https://ccjs.umd.edu/gradprofile/silberman/sarah The goal of this study is to better understand the impact of academic sexual misconduct on graduate students in the greater-DC area. This study is seeking diverse voices on this topic, and I am looking to speak with people currently in academia, who are planning on leaving, and who have already left.

If you or someone you know who experienced academic sexual misconduct: 1) as a graduate student 2) in the greater-DC area 3) between 2011 and now and 4) is interested in participating in a 1.5 - 2 hour interview, please fill out the interest form here: tinyurl.com/asmneardc

Students at Saint-Jean-de-Brébeuf high school in Welland walked out of classes, protesting an alleged sexual assault in a classroom. A 15-year-old girl who says she was sexually assaulted in a classroom feels abandoned by school officials and police after she stood up for herself: After a Welland teen told school officials she had been sexually assaulted in class, she felt she was being punished https://www.stcatharinesstandard.ca/news/niagara-region/after-a-welland-teen-told-school-officials-she-had-been-sexually-assaulted-in-class-she/article_7ec8bae4-c432-585a-a959-36a60b66987c.html

School administrators still do not appear to be listening..? Conseil Scolaire Catholique MonAvenir (formerly Conseil Scolaire de district Catholique Centre-Sud)'s lawyer Paul Marshall at Emond Harnden wrote decades earlier how to minimize sexual abuse in schools, “Minimizing Institutional Exposure for Sexual Misconduct and Bullying in Schools”, The Canadian Institute – Institutional Liability for Sexual Assault, Abuse & Harassment, on March 31, 2008. I couldn't obtain a copy of it. And could only find these decisions: Are there others? https://www.canlii.org/en/on/onoct/#search/type=decision&ccId=onoct&text=Conseil%20scolaire%20de%20district%20catholique%20centre-sud&searchId=2024-10-28T13%3A16%3A53%3A794%2F6d6bb8b8f66643aea6309e97aa5d9ca3&origType=decision&origCcId=onoct

I’m in my early 20s now, but when I was 19 and in a vulnerable state, I was involved with a married man who was twice my age. He held a leading position in a community group I was a part of and was also my tutor. At the time, I was vulnerable, and the power dynamic between us made me feel as though I wanted it or that I had some sort of control. But now, with the benefit of hindsight and being in a much healthier relationship, I realize that it wasn’t a normal relationship—it was grooming.

I’ve since spoken to the authorities in the community, and they’ve taken action by terminating his position. However, he has recently reached out to me, trying to manipulate me again, saying that everything was my choice and even threatening to take legal action for defamation. At first, I was terrified, but I now recognize this as just another scare tactic to control and silence me.

One incident that really solidified my decision to speak up happened in public, when he touched me inappropriately without my consent. When I told him to stop, he became aggressive, as though my refusal was something that offended him. It was at that moment I began to see how toxic and manipulative the situation really was.

I’m feeling really confused and upset because, at 19, I know I was legally an adult when all of this happened, but I still can’t shake the feeling that I was groomed. While it might not meet the legal definition of grooming, the manipulation, power imbalance, and emotional control make it feel so similar. It’s hard to reconcile being of legal age with how vulnerable and taken advantage of I felt.

I feel like I’ve made the right decisions, but part of me still feels anxious about everything that happened. I’d love to hear from anyone who’s been in a similar situation or who can offer some reassurance that I’m not alone in this. It’s been a difficult journey, but I know speaking up was the right thing to do.

Thank you for listening.

I have this idea, that everyone can write the initials of their famous sexual assaulter below, in the hopes that maybe some people can find a match.

I will make a comment for every letter, so comment your abusers initials under the letter of their first name. E.g. Kanye West would be under K This is to make it easier for people to find matches.

If you find a match, you can then ask the amount of letters in their name, their profession, or start with revealing their first name, so you can see if it’s a match.

The purpose of this is to find out which famous people are regularly sexually assaulting people.

My experience which led me to do this:

I was raped by a famous sport person with over 2m followers on IG. This happened 8 years ago but I was (and still am) too afraid to say anything.

"Secret Bad Girl: How I Uncovered My True Sexual Self and How You Can Too"

The book is a memoir by Rachael Maddox. The book explores themes of trauma, healing, and sexual empowerment. It details Maddox's journey of overcoming sexual trauma and reclaiming her sexual identity. Through her narrative, she provides insights and guidance for others who may be on a similar path of healing and self-discovery.

The book combines personal anecdotes with practical advice and exercises, making it both a memoir and a guide for readers seeking to understand and transform their own experiences with trauma and sexuality. It emphasizes the importance of self-love, resilience, and the power of storytelling in the healing process.

The Me,too Movement might sleep already, or is just a constant reminder of how terrifying the world might be/have become. What do you think? Let me know in the comments

My girlfriend was sexually assaulted by a US Marine while she was on an exchange program to Guam. This has left her scarred and traumatized as it is the second time she was assaulted in this way. The first was when she was 12. I know who the man is that sexually assaulted her. But when I approached the US Military about it, nothing was done. I was met with silence. I am South African and she is Korean. She has attempted suicide twice now and she has to take anti depressants and see a psychiatrist and psychologist weekly to help her just keep going. I know what his instagram handle is, but I don’t know what to do with it. We need help.

My adopted father told me my body was his when I was five and he walked in on me in the bathroom naked. I tried to cover up with a towel, but he got mad and took it away and told me I was his and he would look at me if he wanted to. He waited till I was 10 to touch my "breasts" and till I was 15 before he started molesting me. From as early as I can remember he determined what I wore, how long my hair was, and everything thing else until I turned 18 and walked out the door. I'll be 60 on my next birthday. Back then there was nowhere to go and no one to tell. Is it better now? This talk of Project 2025 scares me for all females. What is broken in men's brains that makes them think it's OK to own us?

If you have ever had a sexual assault exam performed, you deserve to know what happened to the evidence. But answers might be difficult to find, depending on where your assault took place and when.

Not all states guarantee people the right to information about their rape kits. My colleagues at USA TODAY and I found that even in places that have committed to testing backlogged kits from old rape cases, survivors are not consistently notified of the results. Some agencies call a survivor only when officials plan to reopen an investigation or believe the case can be prosecuted – a fraction of all reports.

Based on our investigation, we created a guide to help survivors of sexual assault know their rights, find their rape kits and seek support during the process: https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/investigations/2024/09/19/how-to-track-rape-kit/74611461007/

And here are more details about our investigation into a nationwide effort aimed to clear backlogged sexual assault kits: https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/investigations/2024/09/19/doj-rape-kit-testing-program-results/74589312007/

-Tricia Nadolny, investigative reporter at USA TODAY

I recently resigned from a job after only being there a short time. In my letter of resignation I explained the reason for my departure: inappropriate sexually related conduct by the CEO. I laid out in detail my experience.

I've been notified by corporate counsel that they are taking my allegations seriously and will be conducting an investigation using outside counsel.

I don't really care what they do. I just don't want to work there anymore. Maybe that's the wrong attitude. I just know how it's going to play out. He said/she said. And he'll get away with it.

Can anyone provide any insight on how this may play out? What should I expect? How should I prepare for my conversation with the investigator?

I have a friend who has been acting professionally in film and TV for a long time. He's not famous, but he has definitely worked on some big movies and TV shows. Just like everywhere else, he has faced racism, homophobia, and sexual harassment in the industry. The MeToo movement has made things a lot better, but when he's tried to speak out about his experiences, the guilty parties always threaten to sue for defamation.

Early in his career when he was naive and didn't really know what was normal or acceptable, a TV producer of a gay TV series invited him to an audition at the producer's apartment. The producer said that the role would require nudity, so he needed to see what my friend looked like nude. My friend didn't feel comfortable undressing out in the open, so the producer took him into the walk-in closet for him to undress. This was before the MeToo movement and before SAG-AFTRA made a rule against that, so the producer technically didn't break any rules. At the time, only ActorsAccess (popular casting site) had a rule against asking actors to undress at the first audition. When even big stars like Lady Gaga, Corey Feldman, and Constance Wu have been raped, assaulted, or molested but are unable to name the perpetrators, what can an unknown actor do? :/

Everything my friend has been through in the industry has made him want to quit acting. He's still sticking with it though because he loves it, and he's had a lot of positive experiences and met a lot of good people as well. I admire him for continuing to do what he loves despite all the bullshit he has been through, but I know it has definitely taken a toll on him. I wish there was something I could do or say.

I work in a local pub and a customer began to stand at the bar and chat to me while I worked. At first we became friends as the conversations were nice and light. He then invited me to a party after work where he asked if I would like ice in my drink and then took it to the kitchen where I couldn’t see my drink or him. He returned back with the drink without ice saying he didn’t have any but something was floating in my drink and it tasted weird. I left after and blocked him. He still would come into the pub after that and try to speak to me. Then one evening I was at the pub but drinking not working and he insisted on taking me home and the people I was with said they would all take me home together. The next day I found out he was begging the other guys for my Snapchat as he wanted to contact me and chat to me. He also believes that I “want him” and “im obsessed” with him and that I don’t care about my boyfriend. I’ve spoken to my manger at work and he’s now barred and we’ve contact to the police to put a report out but man it is scary.

My partner and I have become fed up with the way that West Virginia University handles sexual assault cases. It started with a TikTok post that my partner bravely made in an effort to expose her own mistreatment and WVU's persistently gaslighting her into feeling like a criminal, and it's gotten some attention. We are presently working with reporters in local and state-wide news publications.

We are also finding that this is very much a pattern at WVU. Many former and current students have already reached out to my partner to share their stories, and that's what ultimately motivated us to just completely reject our fears of speaking up and put in some real work.

If there's interest, I'll keep this post updated, and I'll add links to the articles here as they run.

We are additionally hitting the streets with flyers and we are starting the discussions at every opportunity. The reporters that we are working with are willing to hear more WVU stories, and they can run them anonymously. We just started this grassroots attempt at amplifying the collective voice of WVU's survivors this evening on some local subreddits.

Here is the flyer that we are disseminating. Unsurprisingly, a lot of moderators are afraid to allow it on their subreddit. Curiously, r/WestVirginiaPolitics immediately removed the post with the following explanation: "After review, your post was found to not be related to WV Politics." and has not replied to my attempts to reach out. This issue is *obviously* an issue of particular WV political interest, so their initial response is not acceptable.

r/WestVirginia also deleted the post, but I think they will come around. They're still interacting with me and I think we'll find a compromise on their platform.

I'm sure we'll run in to similar problems when we hit the streets on Friday and post these flyers everywhere on Morgantown's High Street and all over WVU's public campus, but you see, I'm mostly retired, and I have a *lot* of time on my hands now. I also have a laser printer and all the toner I could possibly need. So we'll just put them back up.

Has anyone else here walked in similar shoes? Does anyone have any additional advice for us?

We aren't asking for any legal advice. Moreso, what else could we do to bring attention to this? Specifically, to bring visibility to it locally in Morgantown and at the state level?

I'm open to any and all discussion, here or in DMs. I want to share ideas and figure out how we can amplify the collective voices of WVU so that we can create a framework, a sort of "how-to", that others can use in the future when they find themselves in this type of situation that is very much *not* limited to WVU.

Thanks for listening! Let's talk about it :D

I went through a break up recently with my ex - we were together for 14 years.

Recently I’ve realised I’ve suppressed what I think was systematic sexual assault from the first two years of our relationship, age 16-18. I always thought it was normal to be treated this way but now I’m going through the hard process of realising that it was not normal / acceptable, and he was abusive.

The first thing was he wanted me to take my top off and show him my breasts but I didn’t want to. I pleaded for him to not make me, and asked why he was making me do this. He had a huge tantrum until I eventually did it - and I cried immediately after.

Then he used to put his hand down the waistband of my trousers in public. I asked him not to as it made me and others uncomfortable. He said ok, but then the next day he literally did it again - and I was too scared to say anything again.

He would bring me to the attic (sometimes his bedroom) and touch my bum and finger me. I said to him that he could touch my bum but not go further - but he did. It made me so sad and I felt dirty / wrong.

This continued but “what” he did got more extreme. He started doing oral sex over my underwear which I hated and I’d freeze up. When he did it, I said don’t go under my underwear. Inevitably one time he did, and that just continued. This was the worst and I have more bad flashbacks of - I’d be frozen and he’d hold my legs up and do things. Or drag me to the end of the bed and do it. I was always silent and just looking away trying to imagine it wasn’t happening.

The times I’d strongly tell him no he would have a tantrum and get angry. One time I said I didn’t want to do anything very strongly and he kicked me at the end of the bed like five times.

Side note: in our whole relationship he’s kicked me one other time, and then in another incident, he hit me and threw three things at me in a row.

I’d tell him all the time I was scared and anxious, using the reason I didn’t want to do things was because his parents were in the house. He’d do things anyway and I’d be so stressed. I’d tell him don’t take my clothes off, and he would. I’d ask him could I at least keep my shirt around my shoulders , and he would get angry at that.

If his parents called us to dinner I’d leap up to leave as soon as I could - again he would get angry that I was “worrying so much about them / everyone else”

One time in Spain (age 18), I had made it clear I didn’t want to do anything as we were sharing a small apartment with his family. He tried to pull my swimsuit off at some point and doing something to me (I think I’ve blanked a lot of this) - I did get up and strongly say no. He had a tantrum, and I left. Later I thought surely he would apologise to me for that - and he didn’t. Again he made me feel bad that I didn’t want to do anything.

One time I said I was going to sleep, and he continued to press himself into me and touch me. I got really upset and he did stop, but no apology. This was also at my house, where we did a lot less - and we rarely came to mine.

He never asked me if anything was okay or if anything hurt. A few clear times I remember saying do not do this, and he would. A lot of other times I’d just freeze and let him do whatever…. When I would say no or get upset, he would have tantrums and make me feel as if I was a bad girlfriend for not wanting to do this for him / I was making him feel bad for wanting to do these things to me.

When we started university, I changed my approach to things sex-wise, and I started being more proactive so I could avoid the things I really hated. Looking back I think this was a survival technique. And I totally suppressed the first two years of stuff going onwards. He’d still have tantrums and things, but I think I learned how to manage them more.

Then about five years later, I discovered he had secretly taken nude screenshots of me from any sort of sexy video calls we had done together. I had always made it so clear I didn’t want nude images of me to exist. I found them in a secret folder on his computer and confronted him really upset. He said would I rather him look at porn? And that most girlfriends send nude photos so it’s my problem I have an issue with it.

The rest of our relationship, even though I began to be much more proactive to get sex over with, I’d still randomly freeze up and stop sex mid way through. My ex would be confused why - and cos I had suppressed the first two years, I didn’t really understand why either. Sex always hurt and was something to get over. It was also always finished (except from maybe the last few years) when he came. But I also wanted it to be, like if I could do what he liked to finish quicker then it was over with.

There are lots of other instances of things from age 16-18, eg telling him I was anxious about doing things in public on a walk, but he fingered me anyway. Telling him I didn’t want him to do anything in the back of a car, and again he’d finger me anyway. The first time we had dry sex I said I didn’t want to do that again, and next day he pulled me onto him and we did it again. Even though later it got “better” in the relationship, he’d still complain I didn’t want to do certain sexual things. Complain he’d never get to be with a girl who knows what she’s doing. Complain I wasn’t sexy or confident enough…. I kind of learned eventually one specific thing he liked and would do that all the time. To get it over quickly but it also gave me validation - I could at least do that one thing well. Even if I wasn’t turned on or anything at all.

I should add there was a layer of complexity cos he was a Christian and claimed never to have done anything sexual at all. He was (and is) a super liked person and I always felt so lucky to be with him because he was so good at things, popular, a “good guy” etc.

FYI I’ve begun a new relationship recently where he’s extremely communicative with sex, he respects my boundaries and reminds me that consent has to be enthusiastic. Being with him helped me realise what my ex did to me was not normal…

I still feel doubt at times though. Was this sexual assault? Was this normal or not? Giving my ex the benefit of the doubt… I’m dealing with a lot of doubt and processing a lot, getting some horrible flashbacks. I think I did disassociate a lot through those first 2 years…. Calling it sexual assault is really hard for me too. I don’t know if these instances of things have happened constitute sexual assault, or rape, or what… :(

Thank you for reading if you’ve got this far.

When I was a child I was in two separate situations that were at the very least creepy and/or inappropriate. One involved my grandfather, the other involved a child hood friend. I'll break both situations down. I've been told by some people that with my grandfather it was sexual abuse, some it's grooming, and others it walks the line between sexual abuse and general creepiness. In regards to the childhood friend, ive rarely talked about it. This is a ‼️‼️trigger warning, I will be discussing childhood abuse, child SA, and possible child on child SA some of which will be in detail.‼️‼️ When all of these things happened I was under 11 years of age.

Grandfather;

Excessive/Uncomfortable Touch; • Wet, prolonged kisses that he referred to as a "babe kiss".(just short of tongue)

• Putting his hands between my thighs or up under my shirt to "keep warm"

• Tickling me till I was in a lot of pain or was about to urinate on myself, even when I was screaming and begging him to stop.

• Putting my hand in between his thighs to "keep warm"

• When on his lap under a shared blanket his hands would wonder over my body, oftentimes brushing over or resting eerily close to private areas

• Slapping my butt with hand or cane, even when repeatedly asking him not to.

• Making me help him get dressed after showers when he was in nothing but his briefs.

• Constantly asking for hugs and kisses, wouldn't take no for an answer.

• Would always insist on me sitting on his lap everytime I came over.

Verbal; • Called me hot, baby, sexy, floozy(older slang term simlar to slut or whore) even when asked to stop.

• Asked inappropriate questions/statements about masterbation. (Example: accused me of masterbating in the living room when I was shaking my leg)

• Would often ask me to keep small secrets such as him slipping me candy before dinner. If I told my grandmother he would be overly furious, yelling at and guilt tripping me.

• If I asked him to stop doing something/declined a request he would guilt trip me and manipulate me into feeling bad so I would do said thing or stop trying to set boundaries.

• Sexulized normal child behaviors/normal situations.

Childhood friend Physical; • Forced me to kiss them via blackmail

• Showed our genitals to one another

• Forced me to do things via blackmail(self harm, master bastion, runaway attempt)

Verbal; • Graphically described the sexual abuse they were enduring by family

• Graphically described the sexual acts they wanted us to do.

• Generally just talking about and teaching me things about sex in all of our conversations.

I don't remember anything further than this happening with either person, but I'm scared of the what if's. I was severely neglected and physically abused for my entire child hood. This has caused significant amnesia. I only remember around 20% of my life between 1-13 years old, a majority of that being 10-13 years old. I have many trauma responses common amount csa victims. They are as follows.

• Nightmares that started in later elementary about being sexually assaulted as a child/current age that didn't happen

• Hypersexuality from a young age( for example born and master action addiction starting in elementary school)

• Obsession with everything to due with sex

• I have a specific memory of wishing I could find someone who would take me away from my caregive. My idea was to make a sign saying that if someone would house me, they could rape me all they wanted as payment. (I was around 8-10)

• Extreme fear of being sexually assaulted

• Persistant Intrusive thoughts about SA and CSA

• Intrusive images(for example I often get Intrusive images of situations I'm scared happened to me, such as molestation and childhood rape)

• pOCD symptoms

• Extreme anxiety and fear acossiated with sex(thought I was asexual for a while due to this.)

• Talking with peers in detail about sex and my abuse constantly.

• Nausea/ptsd reactions to being touched in certain ways. (Long Hugs,arm around me, hands on shoulder/thighs,anything sexual,any unwanted touch)

What I want to know is, what was this? Was I sexually abused? Do I have sexual trauma? Am I being dramatic? What makes it harder is the mixed opinions of professionals and loved ones. I've gotten that it was just creepy to it was molestation. I'm so lost and confused, and I have been for a long time. I've come to terms with all but this.

WVU imposed sanctions on me and told me that I had “fabricated” my evidence that I submitted proving I was sexually assaulted.

I didn’t know if this was something anyone else went through, but if anyone is interested in learning about I’ve linked it. It’s seriously disrupted my life.

https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTNvjbHrg/

I 19/F over this past weekend, i hooked up with my ex 19/M whom i love very much and we just had a rough go and it just was never going to work for us so we’ve kept a good friendship where we occasionally if we’re drunk at a party we’ll hook up.

We had sex and he had put on a condom but when he finished he came in inside of me and i realized the condom was gone. I asked him where it was and he was like it’s on and i could see that it wasn’t (and i could feel it) So i figured it was inside of me and then he reaches across the floor and there it was. He said sorry and i was like it’s fine i’ll just get plan b. I did get some and i’m now going to get tested but i’m kind of coming to terms with the fact that it didn’t come off and that he most likely took it off. I know stealthing is considered rape but i just can’t believe it. i’m freaking out because he’s become so close with all of my friends and i talk so highly of him.

I know plan b and std test are essential but should i get a rape kit done? i’m so afraid and confused. I’ve been assaulted before but was i raped?

I (17f) work at a grocery story as a cashier with my friend (16f) and there’s one guy that does carts who I think is 21-22. At first I was really friendly to him and would talk to him because he’d tell me about how he had no friends and how his parents didn’t love him and stuff, which whatever, working at a grocery store makes people want to vent to me all the time. It started like that, but then he began walking me to my car when it became night. Which, at the time, I just thought of as him being respectful. However, he started talking to me about his relationship problems and after my friend said she was 16, he went “aw, you’re too young.” Before I knew this, I had told him that I was 17 and he responded with something along the lines of “oh, that’s fine”. After that, my friend and I started to realize that he was following us to our cars. Sometimes he’d walk with us, but other times he’d just follow. After this, we started avoiding him. When this happened, he chased us for the first time. Now, one thing that I feel bad about is that he is special needs. (I don’t know if that term is correct, sorry.) and I feel terrible saying this, but if I did have to defend myself, I know that I’d have the upper hand. But I also know that he has no actual intention to do anything bad, I think he just wants friends. Regardless, I feel uncomfortable. He’s chased us a total of three times; first time we got to our car before he caught up, second time he was stopped by a woman standing at the entrance of the store, and the third time we went up to one of our managers to say hi and he left. I don’t know how many times he’s followed us.

I know that he won’t do anything, and I know that he doesn’t have any bad intentions, but I’m still uncomfortable. Where I work, they don’t fire anyone unless they get outed as a literal pedophile or make enough customers complain about them (both happened).

I don’t want to come off as ableist or anything, I know that some people have a hard time understanding social cues, which is exactly why I feel bad.

I just started a new job at a government agency. In a meeting with my boss and the CEO the conversation veered off on inappropriate workplace relationships. The next thing I know he's talking about how long he can go (during sex). My boss gave a nervous, uncomfortable laugh. I just sat there in disbelief!

I had hoped it was a one-off but without addressing it ditectly my boss told me the next day that she often has to remind him not to say inappropriate things.

I was so excited about this job but now I'm just deflated! This man is highly decorated and respected. I don't respect him. I'm disgusted by him. I can't work for him.

The agency paid me a signing bonus. If I leave before a year I have to pay it back. I can't afford to pay it back and don't think I should have to. How do I get out of this job? I'm not trying to ruin his life. I'm just trying not to ruin mine.

I was 7 months post partum living with my mom and partner. We had struggled with intimacy since he was cheating and didn’t wanna do anything with me. At the time I didn’t know however he was always extremely hostile and calling me names and threatening to take our daughter away because I was struggling taking care of her all day all night by myself. One day we did decide to have sex first time in months. He suggested anal and I didn’t want to but he asked me a couple more times and said I did it for other guys I should do it for him. I consented, I told him be gentle he started and then it became unbearable and I begged him to get off and tried to get up but he held me down, I just layed limp and cried silently until he finished inside me. I stayed down after and just cried, he apologized profusely and he said he didn’t mean to hurt me. He got angry when I explained he really hurt me and why would he do that and said I acted like he raped me. I didn’t think I was raped and I’ve been thinking about it on and off since it’s been 2 years and every time I just cry. I hate him touching me and he’s never done anything similar since but he always asks for anal and it triggers me badly. I tell him no and he begs I never will say yes again. I’m not sure I’m gonna find closure or strength to leave I feel anxiety every time I try bc he’s always threatened to take our daughter. I don’t know how to heal from this and need help or advice. I don’t know.

It took me over 30 years but I’m finally in a place of healing thanks to counseling and self help books. For my own peace of mind and to claim back my power I confronted the man who raped me when I was a child. He was a teenager then and my babysitter. He used his position of authority and the insane rules I was under to cause me great harm physically and psychologically.

I found him on social media and sent him a message. He blocked me and completely shut down his public account so no one could find him. That gave me some satisfaction. To me it says I’m so ashamed of myself I can’t let anyone else find out what I did.

Unfortunately I grew up in a misogynistic cult that treats women like second class citizens and property. So that added another layer of trauma to the attack. According to the cult, if I had ever told as a child, I would be damaged goods unworthy of an upstanding christian husband because I was no longer “pure”.

Fuck that bullshit and fuck that cult!

And I’m not done trying to get my answers, I deserve that!

I’m reclaiming my power! #metoo #metoomovement

Message sent to my rapist, because no matter if it was just his fingers and objects he raped me!

“I need to know if my keeping silent let you sexually assault another child? And why? Why did you do that to me? Why me? I was such a young child. To this day I don’t know if you or my husband took my virginity. I remember pain, confusion and fear but I was too innocent to understand what you were doing to me. How could you? What had I ever done to deserve that? Being raised in a cult with an obsession with virginity and who ostracizes girls and women who have been sexually assaulted really added another fucked up layer of trauma to what you did to me. I was so afraid of finding out if you raped me that I had my first time on my period so I wouldn’t have to face the truth. Since then I’ve had a lot of therapy and now I need to know the truth so I can come to terms with this and move on. We are way past the statute of limitations, and I’m just seeking peace and closure and to make the flashbacks and nightmares end. Also, I’ve often wondered if my momster in some way encouraged you to hurt me or rewarded you for hurting me like she used to do with my brother.”

(TW r word SA violence threats dr.gs)

I was r worded by someone that wanted to be my p.mp/own me

My girl friend had told me I could trust this guy, A. I was afraid of my ab..ive partner J and I wanted protection and she said her friend would protect me. He was supposed to bring a gun and stay with me while I broke up the ab..er.

A insisted on cleaning my home for me (I'm disabled and struggle with cleaning) and insisted on providing weed, even stopping me when I was about to use my own.

He talked about being religious and we talked about God. He was very charming and handsome.

We ended up doing d..gs that he offered (c.....e) He had really good weed and c.ke it was the best c.ke I have ever had... He had a vape cartridge of thc... and maybe something else I think it might have had ket or ghb

Listening to music and having deep conversations... I can't remember if we drank alcohol...

We needed more weed, he needed more c.ke and I requested shrooms and possibly weed (I paid for my share) While he was gone I was afraid my ex would come at any moment but I was also on d..gs hadn't slept all night and was dissociating...

He came back and we spent hours tripping on shrooms He opened up more than he wanted to, even crying at one point... I saw his inner child buried so deep inside him... We had this raw, vulnerable moment (as it goes with psychedelics)

He sang, beautifully... And I liked him, for a moment... I didn't want to do anything with him though... I still loved my ex, I was only breaking up with him because of my fear of violence.

A wanted me to have s.. with him. I rejected him. Later, he asked again. I rejected him again. And again.

Now he was becoming angry that my friend and I didn't give him any favor in return and he said stuff like "can't even get some p...y" I'm already sitting on the bed at this point and I'm wheelchair bound. He saw my butterfly knife I had in my bed and played with it

He kept asking for a bj, and after many "no"s ... I felt that I had to do it or he would use force and I feared that then it would only be worse...

I wanted it to be over quick so I tried to make him c.. fast I dissociated and did what I had already learned to do... I had already been pressured/groomed into doing this several times by other men.

He asked me questions, I said what he wanted to hear... Just let it be over quick...

He started filming me... Being someone else... Doing what he wants me to do... My cat came over, and he kicked my poor baby away with his foot...

He said he wants my a.s I shook my head... He asked again I said no...

He turned me around and forced me. I dissociated... I tried to mask cries of pain with cries of pleasure I was in so much pain...

Finally it was over...I sit there feeling nothing and staring... He asks me if I'm okay. I nod, of course... I feel so dirty...

He hands me a joint and I lie in a fetal position facing him and take a few drags, feeling a rush of euphoria like a warm blanket of heaven.

He said to me, while I smoke this weed, that he hasn't met anyone like me... That if I let him do anything to me then he will spoil me treat me like a queen give me money, care for me, etc... But I have to always be available to him and he won't talk to me for any other purpose only to be his b..ch

I wake up and he is gone, and so are the keys to my apt and my butterfly knife... At first I texted him to give back my keys... He ignored me...

After all this he lied to my friend that sent him to me, and said to her that I had attempted to seduce him and that he refused.

He never gave back my keys and I was so afraid during the time I had to sleep with the fear he would turn up...

I got back with J... He said he didn't mean the things he said... he could buy me a new lock and he took me to his place for a couple weeks until the new lock came in the mail and he would change it...

My friend was worried about me going to his house but I couldn't stay alone in my apt without a new lock...

On the way there I slept in the car... I hadn't slept all night, I had been too afraid of A to sleep at night... J bragged about how a cop pulled him over, and the cop asked why I was knocked out like that, and J pointed at the wheelchair and charmed his way out of further questioning. So (according to J) the cop let him go.

Since I needed to change my lock, J made me tell him what happened. I was so humiliated and I knew he would eventually see those videos. J didn't believe what happened to me...

I took me a while to process what really happened... At first I remember texting my friend about what happened and he said "Honey that's r.pe..." It's hard to imagine how someone can be so much in denial until you go through it yourself...

I was suffering so much mentally and physically... I had flashbacks of c.. in my mouth and every noise made me jump...

I still have so much pain and resentment in me and I can't enjoy s.. anymore...

A sent me a message a week or 2 later... Asking if I "miss his b.g d..k" or something along those lines...

J wasn't even hiding the fact that he was cheating on me now... He was texting girls, smiling and flirting, while I was crying... After driving me back home and changing my lock, he never came back... But I waited another 2 months thinking we were back together... Until he found a s.. worker in Prague that he brought to Denmark to be his gf

I knew he was talking about himself when he kept saying his friend Adam was obsessed w a s.. worker named Maria. J has an obsession with the name Maria (or Christian names, he had a fixation on one of his names Gabriel and referred to himself as an angel of death). My middle name and my grandmas name. His ex wifes name. His new gfs name...

She saw him texting me on snapchat and confronted me saying she's his gf and she made him block me...

A month later he texted me again attempting to frame her as some evil b..ch that stole his phone and accused him and his friend of imprisoning/kidnapping her. I sent her this bs he made up and she was upset to know he would say things like that about her. She posted a picture of them happily together on his bday the next day.

The whole point of A being there was to protect me from J, another, less dangerous, violent man

J said "I know where ur dad lives" as a threat. He threatened to kidnap me and send me to Macedonia in the middle of nowhere to be a "proper wife". He threatened to kill my friend because she told me she woke up naked in his bed. He forced me to c.. with a vibrator when I kept telling him to stop. He let his friends humiliate and bully me in front of him and only said something when I started crying... He said that when a woman witnessed against him in court, he sold her on the black market.

Yes you read that correctly. Sold her. So I had reasons to be afraid but J would gaslight me and say that I'm just overreacting/paranoid/hysterical... I loved him, I was faithful, devoted, deluded, delulu... And I would always forget the bad things when I missed him.

He comforted me when I was abused in the psych ward and he got me a lawyer that possibly got me out of there.

He held me, caressed me, his hands were so gentle. We were cuddling for like 6 months before we first kissed.

I heard so many stories about his life, and it's difficult to know what was true, when there were so many lies He talked about renovating a house to make an elevator for my wheelchair to the 2nd floor, so I wouldn't have to lift my butt up each step to go to bed and down the steps to use the bathroom or kitchen.

When I stabbed myself in a vein with a knife he took my arm and quickly wrapped it with gauze. When I banged my head on concrete he grabbed me and held me and kept holding while I was hitting his back telling him to let go so I could hurt myself... He made elaborate dinners just to make me happy. And in moments like this he was such a caring person.

But then he would be angry, annoyed with me over my medical conditions and would neglect me. When I had dysentery for weeks after he served me food he got from dumpster diving... I kept asking for water, and I wanted to go to the hospital, his house covered in flies, something was dead in that house and I was poisoned by all the filth... I checked the fridge, and the meat was expired... His roommates cats constantly brought home birds and mice...

J never said "I love you". I loved him I hated him and I feared him.

My r..ist is A from Venezuela. He took advantage of me. I was struggling, in need of help. Poor, sick, and afraid. He made me trust him and insisted on giving favors Then he insisted on getting favors in return

He is a musician and he is involved in crime I'm sure he is a narcissist and his image is very important to him so things like this might piss him off.

If anything happens to me after writing this post... I don't really know what he is capable of... Do we ever know what people are actually capable of?

This is my story and I hope it might give you insight on how human trafficking often starts.