/r/loveless_aro

Photograph via snooOG

a community for loveless Aros, allies and those who are questioning

/r/loveless_aro

135 Subscribers

6

Book at the library that feels like it’s driving me crazy

I don't love people. I wish I did. But I just don't know how. Trying to comprehend love feels like trying to put together a puzzle without all the pieces. I want to say I at least care for people. But I don't know if I do. I'm trying to think of a single person that I would really truly care if they died tomorrow. I don't even care about animals beyond the most abstract sense. Like, I care about animals in general (I'm vegan), but this specific animal in front of me? It's dumb and stupid. I don't care if it dies.

The only thing I can really say I love and care for are objects. Objects are alive to me. They talk in my head. I take them places. We are friends. I love them deeply and unconditionally. On a level that most of the people around me find extremely strange. I would care a lot if one of them were destroyed. I held a funeral for my broken air humidifier. I didn't do that for my pet hamster. I didn't even cry when that happened.

At the library, I saw a book titled "Love People. Use Objects. Because the Opposite Never Works." I do the opposite. I love objects and use people. But I don't know how to change. But also, what does never works mean? Is this why my mental illness isn't getting any better? I've been fighting depression for over two years now. Other than mild fluctuations, nothing's really improving. I still get suicidal thoughts. I just don't tell anyone because I'm afraid I'll be hospitalized. Is that why? Because I don't love people? How do I love people? Is my brain just broken?

2 Comments
2024/07/19
04:15 UTC

14

Hi, is this sub still active?

I had an experience today relating to potentially being loveless that's really bothering me. I'm not going to bother to type out the whole thing if I'm just posting in a dead sub. I just want to talk to other loveless people.

5 Comments
2024/07/19
03:47 UTC

7

I've never even had a friend

Felt like ever supposed relationship when I was younger was just part of some govt operation and they were all operatives and freemason's and etc controlling everything . Every guy I showed interest in got approached by them and I'd never marry anyone who gave their word to honour some group of people over me etc.

Anyways, so like it was all a set up and seems I can't base anything off any prior experience I ever had before. Like they all wanted to try me to be king of the world . To inherit the world or something, and didn't seem to give any kind of shyte about me, just power.

So I wished to be ugly cuz everyone always mentioned how beautiful I was. Ugh

I crave romance but not attracted to anyone romantically or sexually.

Sex and kissing is gross.

Mostly cuz it was only used to hurt or control or manipulate , and not out of love at all, just torture.

All torture . State actors and operatives

Is there anyone real who isn't a state actor or a Operative out there

😵‍💫🥺😥

Like a a huge huge trafficking operation. They only wanted to farm kids and spiritual power out of me while attempting to enslave and destroy me

But why not just try actually being cool for once, anybody

4 Comments
2024/01/19
16:18 UTC

3

Whispers in the Shadows

He creado una versión de Careless Whisper de Wham / George Michael, basándome en el sentimiento de pérdida de George Michael al perder a alguien que amó.

Esta versión es una versión más oscura que enlaza tristeza, actividad paranormal y que sonaría perfectamente como Metal.

Title: "Whispers in the Shadows"

(Intro)

Verse 1: In the dark, where the shadows play, A tale unfolds of love's decay. David's heart, heavy with regret, Lost in dreams, where sorrows set.

Chorus: Whispers in the shadows, haunting every night, A love betrayed, now a ghostly plight. Victoria's eyes, now veiled in dread, In the echoes of remorse, where the guilty are led.

Saxophone Interlude

(Instrumental Break)

Verse 2: Old VVitch's words, a doorway to the unknown, "Alfa Dream," a realm where secrets are sown. "Victoria, Exita me (Latin)," he pled in vain, A macabre dance, where pleasure meets pain.

Chorus: Whispers in the shadows, the spirits intertwine, A love once pure, now a twisted design. Victoria's whispers, a malevolent song, In the corridors of dreams, where redemption is gone.

Saxophone Interlude

(Instrumental Break)

Bridge: In the moonlit haze, where nightmares brew, David's soul entangled, emotions askew. The specter of Victoria, a relentless chase, In the haunted echoes, where love leaves no trace.

Chorus: Whispers in the shadows, a symphony of despair, A once tender love, now a phantom's snare. Victoria's laughter, now a haunting refrain, In the ghostly ballad, where forgiveness is slain.

Saxophone Interlude

(Instrumental Break)

Outro: In the silence of the night, where the echoes linger, A love betrayed, lost in the spectral rigor. Whispers in the shadows, a lament for the departed, In the ghostly waltz, where love, remorse, and darkness started.

Aquí se enterarán de que es el Sueño Alfa: https://youtu.be/_zO4kLzPJLE?si=qoupJye4iIQMz5Cg

La Imagen fue creada mediante Inteligencia Artificial.

2 Comments
2023/12/22
02:50 UTC

7

Can you be both aegoromantic and a loveless/heartless aro?

I like reading and writing about love and romance. I'm a big reader, and I do occasionally ship. But I don't feel related to it myself. I don't feel like I experience love. I don't feel connected to romance either. I want to reclaim the aro stereotypes. I wouldn't say that there's anything I really love. But I like love. I guess.

3 Comments
2023/11/19
14:53 UTC

8

How exactly do you know if you’re a loveless aro?

I’m questioning some things. I know I’ve never been in love. Idk if I’ve ever loved anyone. I don’t really know what love is, doesn’t everyone define it differently? If so, what exactly makes a loveless aro? I’ve seen some people say they still care about people deeply even though they identify as a loveless aro, but isn’t that what love is? Deeply caring for someone else? I dunno, I guess I’m just really confused.

3 Comments
2023/10/06
01:32 UTC

10

Read below

I decided to publicly call out the hypocrisy from the aro community & I want to include some examples where they've been aphobic just cause someone doesn't feel love. You can write your terrible experiences,as if I basically just have 2 & I'd like to hear it from other loveless or attraction repulsed aros and include it in the video.

1 Comment
2023/05/29
10:17 UTC

16

That's a win win.

3 Comments
2023/05/23
12:23 UTC

3

I can't get out!

Stuck in a relationship of 12 years and I can't get out. I was a single dad when we met. I was struggling to make ends meet and she was living off of her wealthy mother. Her mother bought us a modest house (50k) but the caveat was that I had to be on the deed and she was "my problem now". I thought it was funny at the time she said it. We struggled for 6 years with me working on the road and only being home on weekends. She cared for my daughter while I worked and sent money home to her. I paid all the bills and expenses. She has not had a job since the day we started living together. She would hit her mom up for property taxes once a year. I didn't know her mom was also sending her 2500 dollars a month from the beginning. When I came home, I had to do all the dishes from the week, yard work, and try to un-bury the house. It was a borderline hoarder situation with clothing for my daughter that we most certainly didn't need. ( these clothes currently reside in a 10x30 storage locker that is just clothing). I will come back to that later. After a terrible 6 month contract in Nashville, I quit contracting and vowed to never do it again. Before I came back, she asked if I wanted to do anything in particular when I got back. My reply was "honestly , I just don't want there to be a pile of dishes in the sink when I walk in". I came home to three storage totes of dirty dishes in the back yard! Came home and worked locally 60 to 70 hours a week to pay the bills. No sex , no intimacy , and no change in the household. Fast forward a bit. Her mother took ill and she went to Texas to care for her. Her mother passed away while she was there. She didn't want me to attend the funeral, but later says I should have been more supportive. She spent 6 months in Texas "getting her mother's stuff settled". I had to fly down when she came back to pack and clean her mother's home so it would be fit to show on the market. Her mother was a very orderly woman. The mess was made by my spouse. Spouse was an only child an inherited roughly 6million dollars. We house hunted for a while at her behest(I am still very happy in our little house). She was looking at crazy expensive houses and I wasn't on board with that. She ended up buying a house in another state. At every part of the purchase I told her I wasn't pulling my child out of her school and moving there. She bought it anyway. She left her apple watch here around the Holliday season and made excuses why she couldn't be here for Christmas. I started checking out the watch and learned she was in a hotel with an ex over the holidays and got all the details with some videos too.there were a total of 3 affairs that I know of in the span of a year and a half. I've tried to leave her but somehow keep getting sucked back in. She still has the house in Minnesota and I still live in the Wisconsin house. She comes here for a week or 2 at a time, leaves a mess and goes "home". No intimacy or anything. She just watches TV, reads, and takes my dog to the park. Wtf am I doing and why can't I get away? I try just being a grumpy asshole, but she start being all sweet when she senses I've had enough . Like, I can go on a complete tirade of how I'm done with her, I'm leaving, fuck her and her money and then she flips a switch and it's like we were never arguing!

3 Comments
2023/04/29
14:13 UTC

15

Why is love associated with morality?

That bothers me. I was watching a show on Netflix (Rising Dion, if some known), and some people are saying the villain is actually a good person because "he didn't want to kill the people he loves, only people he didn't know". That is not exactly true, but even if it was : how does that make sense? For me it only proved the character was selfish : if he knows the person, he doesn't want to kill cause they don't want to miss them, but random people, he doesn't care cause no consequences. Seriously, the guy kills people. The fact the he loves some people and decides to spare them doesn't make him a good person.

Why do they think loving someone means tou have morality?

2 Comments
2023/03/16
08:00 UTC

3

Can you identity as loveless aro both and cupidromantic

I identity as a loveless aro and lovequeer aro and I still see me in a romantic relationship and i am curious. What is your thoughts on this?

2 Comments
2023/01/30
17:23 UTC

9

When the video dissussing love actually has aro rep!!!

0 Comments
2023/01/25
06:53 UTC

10

Why is love treated so religiously?

The other day I had the brillant idea to open a discussion about love. I was expecting misunderstanding of course but not this much that we could not even discuss my question. But the thing that surprises me the most was how some people talked about love. Don't get me wrong, I know that some people link every good action to love and that they will question how someone can be caring or kind without loving. I also knew that some of these people will not change their mind on that. But I wasn't expecting people talking about love as believers talk about their God(s). And I'm not even exagerating, it really gave me this feeling. For some people love is a great force that is everywhere and is everything positive, and affects everybody, and there is no way to deny it cause they don't only believe it, they seem to have faith in this. It was to the point that I really didn't dare saying anything cause I would have felt like someone telling to a Christian that God is an invention. I also knew for sure people won't get it. I think it is the only time where I knew pursuing discussion was point less not because we disagree, but because our way of relating to things, seeing the word and our beliefs were completely aliens to each other.

And I just wonder why. Why love is treated this way by some people? Why do they believe in love to the point that they see evverything through it and can't get that some people just don't feel it, or don't value it? I'm genuinely asking cause I don't get it.

3 Comments
2023/01/06
20:49 UTC

9

Have you told people you’re loveless?

I am starting to come to terms with my maybe being loveless, and I’m super anxious about sharing it with anyone. i feel like not experiencing attraction is nothing compared to not experiencing love (as far as society is concerned). Like how do I tell my friends who love me that I don’t love them back, despite me caring deeply about them? Anyone have any experience with this? How did it go?

5 Comments
2023/01/04
15:12 UTC

4

Can i be loveless if i love doing activities or some things?

6 Comments
2022/12/27
12:18 UTC

8

How can be lovelessness the only known "attraction",when 85% of the community are alloplatonics craving qpr or platonic affection..

1 Comment
2022/09/18
11:29 UTC

14

"Love" these moralists. Like stfu and stop spreading the attraction bs. Context: a pic with synonyms and friendship was one of the words.

0 Comments
2022/08/26
12:35 UTC

2

Is there an official flag.

I’ve looked it up and haven’t seen anything official just pitches and stuff like that. Just wondering.

1 Comment
2022/07/30
14:27 UTC

6

Heartless and Voidpunk Aros, whats up?

I have been on a whirlwind of questioning my orientation, I used to think I was Xeno-Oriented/Xenor romantically, but I think I was just copying what I thought I wanted in a romantic relationship. Now that I am discovering more and more about aromanticism, I am starting to feel like I'm a voidpunk, alterhuman, Heartless and Loveless Aro. I don't feel love, and that makes me feel happy. I realized I'm voidpunk and alterhuman because I simply have too many reasons as to why I reject the notion of "being human" and feel both concepts really interest me.

So..Voidpunk Aros and Heartless Aros, how are ya'll?

0 Comments
2022/04/18
10:17 UTC

6

Can I still call myself “Loveless” if I feel like I love my family? I still don’t feel sexual, romantic, or even platonic attraction.

And I compare myself to a robot a lot because I’m also autistic, and I feel like I don’t relate to a lot of human social things.

1 Comment
2021/12/13
18:08 UTC

11

I feel comfortable here

Not much to say

1 Comment
2021/11/27
01:32 UTC

5

The more the merrier

0 Comments
2021/10/24
20:58 UTC

15

A subreddit for loveless aros

I made this subreddit for loveless aro people. If you don't know what a loveless person is, it's basically an Aromantic person who feels no connection to love, don't use love to describe their emotions and/or don't feel love. This can be caused by trauma or a neurodivergency but it's perfectly valid if it isn't too.

1 Comment
2021/08/13
00:59 UTC

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