I am a relatively young behavior technician (19 going on 20) who is trying to figure out whether or not she wants to become a BCBA one day. Can someone help me out/what do you advise? So, I admit that I have not really committed at this stage to a major. I am thankfully in community college. I have actually recently been considering obtaining an associates degree in community social services/drug addiction, because as I near 20 (I turn 20 in April) I understand that I am not “motivated” enough to obtain a bachelors or masters degree in Psychology at present. I do have depression and anxiety. I was a teaching assistant before this, bumped up from $17/hr to $19/hr. I make $25/hr at my job (started in October, though first two weeks were dedicated to training.) I made $23/hr before passing my BCAT. I have $24.7k saved. I’m still unsure as to whether or not I want to work towards eventually becoming a BCBA, some part of me feels like it’s too early to decide. I know I want to make more than $25/hr and that I enjoy working with youth (with children.) I don’t know how I’d do working with adults. It’s hard for me to say how I’d do working with teens because I am technically still a teenager myself, lol.

I have family members who are struggling with addiction, and I admit that I am curious about addiction - about what can be done to help those who are struggling with it on a path towards recovery. A family member who is 25 has been in rehab for years. I understand that he is partly struggling with addiction and has been in these centers for so long because the centers haven’t found a way to encourage him to see a therapist/fully addressed the mental health aspect of it. I also think a lot of them are understaffed. They do have him on meds so it’s not like they’re negligent or something, I just think more needs to be done for people in the center on an individual basis. Helping them out with housing, helping them find a way to make money, addressing racism they may experience.

I admit that, as I near twenty, I am starting, to an extent, to regret having not just chosen a community college major. I have a 3.88 and am technically a Psychology major, but have not been taking all of the courses I’d need to actually obtain an associates degree in the field, probably in part because I haven’t been “sure” about what I want to do with my life. When I was eighteen, I didn’t really know myself. As I near twenty, I have a better idea of who I am, though I’m still not sure. I do feel as though I’ve matured. If you ask me right now whether or not I feel like an adult, I’m more inclined to say yes than I was when I was 18 or even when I had been 19 for a few months. I feel weird about it, though, because at the same time some part of me feels as though I haven’t actually been out of high school for that long. I feel very strange about my age. I feel like I need to be doing more right now in terms of my education. I’m signed up for college courses next semester and intend to take it seriously, but some part of me feels like at this point, I just need to make a choice. It’s just so hard to make that choice because I don’t know how things are going to change for me as I grow older. My family is unstable, my mother has been instigating arguments with my father who took $10k from me (he still owes me $3k) ever since early November. She’s accused all of us, the entire family - the entire community - of being involved in a setup. And with Trump’s inauguration today, I just feel so strange. Everything is about to change. Everything is changing. I’d be lying if I said I feel “good.” I don’t. I continue to work and will take my college courses seriously, but I don’t feel good. I can’t even bring myself to sit down and watch some feel good films tonight. I am stressed and wish that I weren’t.

I do enjoy my job as a BT (behavior technician.) My client has been scoring 100% with me on a few more of their programs, which is great. Although I have 1170 LinkedIn connections and know that I could likely (possibly) find work through the platform if I ever were to land in a rough spot down the line, I don’t feel “confident” about my future. I feel like I should be doing better, like I should be doing more. I am getting the kinds of connections I want, I am making more money than I was at this time a year ago ($8/hr more, in fact) but I am not feeling great about my education level right now. I haven’t taken community college as seriously as I should have. I was removed from one case early on in my career as a Bt (the first one I technically had) though I have always felt as though something fishy was going on with that. I was basically removed, as silly as it may sound (not as silly as it may sound, I know it sounds silly, regardless of what overly critical Redditors may think. I’ve had passing thoughts about how if I were a BCBA or bystander who heard about it, I’d probably just laugh it off) for forgetting to flush a toilet. The mom claimed that it happened 4 times (I was, for the record, only in her home twice. Once on a Tuesday, the other time on a Thursday. And I was one of 3 BT’s in a home, so I’m curious as to how she was so confident that it was me. She had mentioned it on Thursday, was almost yelling about it. She didn’t say in the moment that she thought it had happened before. I had actually apologized towards the end of session.) I personally suspect, though I could never prove it, that it’s possible she lied about it having happened 4 times. I partly suspect this because I recall that she was prepared to spank her nonverbal 2 year old for taking an interest in my food, which is not normal (the child was, as I said, literally just taking an interest in it. Didn’t eat it, they didn’t harm me.) In spite of the fact that the BT who was training me seemed to be on good terms with her (very good terms. Better terms, imo, than a behavior tech and parent are likely supposed to be on. They almost kind of talked to each other like friends) I wouldn’t be surprised if she were worse behind the scenes. Someone who’s threatening to spank their kid in front of a stranger like that would likely do more behind closed doors if they could get away with it. Even if she wasn’t lying, I don’t think her communication was good, and I think it’s very odd personally to count how often someone who is in your home uses the restroom. If I were the mom in that scenario, I would have waved it off (I understand that it was a potential safety hazard, but it was a toilet full of pee and I don’t think it was necessary to go to the company about it. If it were such a serious safety hazard, she should have told me after the first time it allegedly happened.) I think she was an abusive parent. I also think she was dealing with internalized racism, as I seem to remember noticing that she sent her son to a school that was primarily white (not a black or even teacher of color in sight, all white teachers, the BT on her eldest kid’s case was a white woman and the other one was Asian. No black people. I’m a black woman, the family was black.) She went to the company and the school, she wasn’t relaxed. The BCBA had also asked me on the phone when I was at the school the following Monday if I could go to the school’s bathroom to check and make sure I had flushed the toilet.

I hadn’t reported the mom above threatening to spank to CPS in part because spanking in my state is apparently not illegal. It’s harmful for the child of course and I think it should be illegal, but by technicality it’s not. I had actually more or less told the woman who does client planning what I said above (about how/why I thought the situation was fishy - not the stuff about a potential dual relationship between mom and BT or about the spanking threat, but I had mentioned that I wondered why the mom didn’t first mention it on a Tuesday if it were such a serious concern. I had been pretty apologetic about it when talking to lady on client planning even though in hindsight I really do think it was a ridiculous situation. The lady who does client planning never directly responded when I mentioned I wondered why mom didn’t immediately mention it. No one from my company ever reached out to discuss it with me. I suspect this was the case either because a higher up heard about it and, like me, thought it was ridiculous and not worth pursuing (what were they going to say? “Hey, mom said you didn’t flush 4 times. Make sure you flush the toilet when you work in homes and schools in the future, okay?” which would be really uncomfortable anyway, lol) or because woman who does client planning had explained the situation to me already. I really do think the mom wasn’t a nice person, though I actually don’t think about it terribly often now anyhow, I really appreciate the family I currently work for. I also remember getting the impression on Thursday that the mom thought I wasn’t “smart,” she was acting really uptight after the forgetting to flush toilet incident and I think had asked the behavior tech who was training me to hand her the paper towels because I guess she somehow thought I wasn’t going to do it right or something. I suspect she believed I wouldn’t pass my exam, or wouldn’t do right with her child. The client I currently have has been scoring 100’s on a few of our programs and I did pass my exam, so she was wrong.

Thankfully, the family I currently work for are much better, and I am all set to start working with a second (and potentially third, it sounds like) client come February. I really do like my job. I enjoy seeing clients make progress. I scored a 135/150 on my BCAT (board certified autism technician exam) as I’d made sure to study for it ahead of time, I was very worried about potentially failing it. I made sure to have meetings with my trainer after the fact. I’m glad that I’ll never have to take it again, though I know I may have to take the RBT exam in the future if I choose to switch companies.

My work profile looks very “complete” if you glance it over, in a way that no other social media profile of mine does. I keep a low number of followers on Instagram and other platforms, but on my work profile I allow a lot more and have recently started to receive a larger amount of invites (in the beginning, I was honestly just sending out invites to a lot of different people. And, to my surprise, I got the ones I wanted, for the most part.)

I don’t sleep well, and I look like I don’t. I sleep well sometimes, but even when I get in the bed early I wake up and I just don’t look well rested. I’m still able to “function” in spite of it, which I suspect is related to my age. When I’m in my late twenties-early thirties I will of course have a harder time functioning without an adequate amount of sleep. I don’t wear makeup even though some people have pointed out that I look really tired. I’ve considered it, but I haven’t done it.

When I babysat recently this Saturday, I was too busy giggling and playing a game of chase with the child to properly engage in conversation with the parent. I actually did have a lot of fun with them (I’ve babysat them a few times in the past. I’ve felt a bit of guilt as my availability is now going to change and so I may not have as much time to babysit, but I’m trying to keep weekend evenings open.)

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Hi everyone!

I've seen a lot of descriptions of high Fe (dom/aux) or xxFJs usually being actively accommodating, checking in on the group, making sure everyone is happy, etc. Actively seeking to create group harmony. I've also heard ISFJs tend to be more extroverted introverts because of this.

I'm curious if there's any ISFJs who don't relate to this. Either you're only like that around select people (as opposed to any group setting) or you don't actively seek out creating harmony. For example, just being generally polite, non-confrontational, agreeable, but not the type of person to go out of your way to create harmony yourself. Instead, just maintaining what's already existing. Tending to appear as more true introverts instead of extroverted introverts.

I'm curious if ISFJs relate more to the first paragraph or second. And if having quieter Fe means that Ti is higher or that you're in a loop (if you agree with the loop theory).

As title says.

I've been dating this my partner (26) for almost a year now, and I'm not sure if he's INFP or ISFJ. We don't have enough time for taking tests, we haven't been dating for that long for me to fully understand how does he experience life, and he is not interested in typology, so I don't wanna drag him into it just to know his type, because it's irrelevant to our relationship, I'm just simply curious. It's especially difficult for me to type him since we're long distance and I can't directly see how his brain works most of the time.

So - how would you describe a mature male ISFJ, from your experience. What are the key traits of them in workplace, relationship, and day-to-day life?

INFP here, and maybe a very delusional one because of my Fi+Ne, by that I mean I saw the 0,01% potential (Ne) in getting closer (Fi) to an ISFJ and now I am grieving when I realize that small unrealistic/delusional 0,01% potential went down to 0%, no potential in befriending an ISFJ anymore because they are quitting job in a few days.

I really liked this one ISFJ (it was not reciprocated as they are 7 years older than me and saw me as a child and were annoyed if I didn't clean something properly, but I always tried to clean it as perfectly as possible). I'm not even sure in what way I liked them, but I really liked their nurturing and caring personality and I still remember when they prepared food for me, it was nothing to an ISFJ but it was so meaningful to me because I never experienced that type of kindness and caring by anyone. And they also had such a cute aesthetics when it comes to clothes, their clothes always being cozy yet aesthetically nice. And they also looked very healthy and gentle...

Since our personalities are different, I'm interested in learning more about how you ISFJs process things. Do you ever grieve over a lost potential in becoming closer to someone or some other type of potential (maybe liked to Ti potential instead of Fi)? I kind of hoped I would fix my relation with this ISFJ (we kind of had some disagreements) and maybe get closer to them, as in befriend them, basically we were at a distance in every way as we didn't work in the same shift and I barely saw them but I did work with them around 20 times in those 6 months that they have been working, and I knew what type of person they were despite that.

TLDR: ISFJ is quitting job. We weren't close and had some disagreements but I, an INFP, wish we were friends because I really admired nurturing energy they had (and their nurturing moments towards me) and wanted to be close to them but now I need to grieve over 0,01% potential (of befriending them and fixing our relation) getting down to 0% potential. Do you ever experience that as an ISFJ?

Hi all you warm cuddly people :) I'm dating an isfj man and he's the sweetest, most thoughtful person.

The issue is, he's VERY resistant to any change, even if he knows it's good for him.

He says he knows he should do more things to improve his life, but he struggles with the motivation to do it. Sometimes it's that it's difficult, or different, or just "not what he's used to".

I've tried to be supportive, give him time, nudge him along, but it seems like even if he does do new things WITH me, the inertia doesn't continue when he's on his own and he goes back to his comfort zone.

I've brought this up to him several times because it's affecting our relationship now (e.g. he knows he needs to take a course to get a higher-paying job so he can move out, knows he needs to try and get out more, try to build a support network). I'm not asking for these things to be instant, but just that he tries without me having to bug him about it.

He (self-proclaimed) doesn't have much insight on what motivates him, so I was hoping you guys could help give some ideas!

Is it a fear of something? How can I help with that?

Sometimes I think it's maybe because he doesn't care about himself :( Because to me, these things are essentially self-care and wanting more for yourself, but I could be wrong.

You can answer this in detail or on a scale of 1 to 10 or both. You may also answer this question in general and ignore the situations altogether.

1. You are casually going by and a person bumped into you. They didn't say sorry and just moved on.
2. Out of the blue, an acquaintance shouts at you. You didn't do anything. Later on, they come to you and say sorry. They don't seem genuine.
3. Same as above but this time they do seem genuine.
4. You have a really, really close friend; like 'someone who understands you' kind of friend. You find out (from a genuine source, i.e. what you heard is 100% accurate) that they were actually manipulative. They lied to you. When you confronted them about it, they ignored you.
5. Same as above but here they seemed shocked that you know about it. After a while they come to you and say sorry. They apologized multiple times and said that they didn't mean to manipulate you and that they'll not do this again.

I asked this on the ENFP sub and I'm curious about what you guys think.. Also, I wonder if it has any correlation with MBTI, so I'm planning to ask this on the other MBTI subreddits.

Source: https://vultology.com/database/?type=SiFe&development=

The Si function understands life as a series of events located in specific moments in time, and tied to each other in definite relationships. Si is keenly focused on accuracy and readily notices misquotations, invalid facts and is generally skeptical of unverified data. Si users emphasize the importance of understanding the historical context of things, frequently incorporating additional narrative details in their discussions. Thus, Si users often have an appreciation for history which drives them to gather extensive knowledge, often becoming avid readers, storytellers, and experts in many fields like anthropology, geography, and archeology.

ISFJs (Standard)

• Abdel Fattah El-Sisi(President of Egypt)
• Gabriel Barkay(Israeli archaeologist)
• Gerald Edelman(American biologist)
• Gillian Welch(American singer-songwriter)
• John Beebe*(American psychiatrist)
• Mary Douglas*(British anthropologist)
• Neil Gaiman(English writer)
• Philip Ovadia(Cardiac surgeon)
• Richard Schechner*(Professor of performance studies)
• Robert Rauschenberg(American painter and graphic artist)
• Rosa Parks(American activist)

ISFJs with developed Fe (Diplomats)

• Caroline Dean(British botanist)
• Eric Weinstein(American investor)
• Hilary Putnam(American philosopher and mathematician)
• Joe Biden*(46th U.S. President)
• Mario Sznajder(Political scientist)
• Nelson Mandela*(Former President of South Africa)
• Noam Chomsky(American linguist)
• Paul Ekman*(American psychologist)
• Ra Uru Hu*(Founder of the Human Design System)
• Richard Brody(American film critic)
• Thomas Moore*(Psychotherapist and former monk)
• Umberto Eco(Italian medieval historian and novelist)

ISFJs with developed Ti (Scholastics)

• Gaahl(Norwegian musician)
• Paul Simon(American singer-songwriter)
• Tom Petty*(American singer-songwriter)

ISFJs with developed Ne (P Polarized)

• Bill Nye*(American science communicator)
• Leonard Cohen*(Canadian songwriter)
• Max Richter(German-British composer and pianist)
• R. Kelly*(American singer-songwriter)

ISFJs with developed Fe and Ti (J Heavy)

• Desmond Tutu(South African Anglican cleric and theologian)
• Karl Popper(Austrian-British philosopher)

ISFJs with developed Fe and Ne (Inspirers)

• David Fincher(American film director)
• Fredrik Barth*(Norwegian anthropologist)
• Joss Whedon*(American screenwriter and director)
• Keith Raniere(American cult leader)
• Philip Seymour Hoffman(American actor)
• Ridley Scott(British director)
• Terence McKenna(American ethnobotanist)

ISFJs with developed Ti and Ne (Ephemeralists)

• Werner Heisenberg(German theoretical physicist)
• William Gibson(American-Canadian fiction writer)

ISFJs with developed Fe, Ti, and Ne (Fully Conscious)

• Bobby Azarian(Science writer)
• Denis Villeneuve(Canadian film director)
• Mark Z. Danielewski(American fiction writer)

I found it because of an incident at work, that theoretically shouldn't have happened. I was cleaning a theater while the end credits of The Wolfman were rolling, which is usually fine, but few minutes into them, the music changed into an assault on the senses. forcing me to run and out have someone else clean it.

It made me dizzy to the point I had to sit down, and nauseous to the point I had to ask to leave. Basically I got a concussion from the end credits of The Wolfman.

Still dealing with the effects, which could last 7 days or more.

Webmd has a fairly good article on it. Now for a brief overview, (all of this is taken from Webmd, No original research on my part. I just edited it for brevity.

Hyperacusis is a hearing disorder that makes it hard to deal with everyday sounds. You might also hear it called sound or noise sensitivity. If you have it, certain sounds may seem unbearably loud even though people around you don't seem to notice them.. roughly 1 in 50,000 people are affected by it

Symptoms of Hyperacusis

The symptoms of hyperacusis can affect your everyday life and include:

Depression

Anxiety

Ear pain

Relationship problems

Trouble connecting with others (social isolation and avoidance)

Some sounds that might seem louder than they should include:

A running faucet

A kitchen appliance, like a refrigerator or dishwasher

A car engine

A loud conversation

Hyperacusis is more than just sensitive hearing; it’s a complex auditory disorder that can turn even the most mundane activities into excruciating ordeals. Picture trying to enjoy a meal at a restaurant, only to be overwhelmed by the clinking of cutlery and the murmur of conversations. Or envision the challenge of simply walking down a busy street, where every passing car and distant siren feels like a physical blow to your eardrums. (Taken from a separate source)

That's just a barebones overview, but I also found some relaxing videos that help, the first one almost had me asleep in 3 minutes. You've all heard of white noise, but how about pink noise? even orange noise? Basically it can be a tool to mask other sounds.

The pink sounds like tv static mixed with an ocean

And the orange kind of sounds like travelling through space. The orange is my favorite.

Apologies for the long read but I couldn't figure out how to further edit and still do justice to the information.

I want to create a list of anime movies or series that represents the Isfj personality type so I can study and look for insights!

Nice to meet you all isfj,Sorry,its just iam never seen people seeing a isfj spoiled brat in this sub?,so i feel curious

I've taken many MBTI tests (I've taken the official test about 5 times in the last few years) and have had different results. Most of the time I was identified as an ISFJ, INFJ or ISTJ and I still get confused between them. Was there anything that helped you to finally be sure that this was your type?

I know there are people who have basically studied the types to where they understand why one attracts the other. I am just really curious on why I, ISFJ woman, tends to be attracted to INTJ’s, ISTJ’s, and occasionally, ENTJ’s??

And I know it varies from person to person on compatibility, but just type-wise, why am I attracted to those?

(If you also need my enneagram, I’m a 6w5, thank you for reading!)

Just curious.

I’ll go first. My parents split up I was 8, my mum would sometimes get upset about having difficulty with money raising 2 kids alone, when she would talk about it with anyone I would listen and later that day I would put my own pocket money that I have got from Xmas in her purse without ever telling her, (usually 10 or 20 £ notes) she never knew.

I used to love the PS2 game Pixar Cars (a Disney cartoon racing car game). After I completed the game I would go back on every level and make the scripted loser of each one win instead, because I felt bad. You couldn’t play them but I would mess up everyone else to make it happen. My sister watching me thought I was really weird 😭 tbf it is strange for a 7-9 year old lol

In the way ISFJs typically are to ESTPs. Just want to hear about what your experience has been! For me it’s been ESFP. ESTP’s actually don’t tend to like me very much.

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I have a lot of unpopular opinions here:

-Veronica from Heathers is an INFP 6w5, not an INFJ. The scene where she confuses the wicked witch of the west/east strikes me as being very Ne/Si (forgetting a little detail like that.) Very biting comments that an unhealthy Fi/Te user would make. Going back to her childhood friendship with Betty Finn, seems somewhat nostalgic over it - sounds like Si. I think she only seems like an INFJ to so many because she’s a 6w5.

-Heather Duke was a 3w2. I used to see 3w4 but I don’t see it anymore, she seems too focused on popularity and socializing, there’s no true sense of introspection or inner turmoil as there would normally be with a 3w4. I remember personalitybase.com had her typed as an ESFJ, I could actually see it - she’s a lot like Gretchen from mean girls in the sense that she sticks with her posse even though they aren’t nice to her (sounds Fe over Te Dom to me) and, at least when Chandler is around, never actually stands up for herself. The bragging about how people love her, the submissiveness when Chandler is there (apologizing to Chandler who said something to her in a biting tone, very Fe Dom response) - I think she’s an ESFJ 3w2 who was disintegrating and “found her power” only after her bully was gone. The whole staying with a group of people who for the most part don’t treat you well to protect your reputation seems more like something an ESFJ (Fe Dom) would do than an ESTJ.

-Heather Chandler, ESTJ 3w2.

-Heather MacNamara… she’s the hardest of the three for me to type. I’m inclined to say that I think she’s just an ISFJ who isn’t terribly nice. I was watching a scene pack of clips from the film yesterday, and was thinking ISFx even though popular interpretation is ESFJ. She does make a couple of mean comments (“gross” about Heather’s bulimia, “god Veronica drool much?” which could be interpreted as sarcastic,) but seems more inclined to stay in the background than the other heathers. What makes me think Fe over Fi is how she suggests that she easily succumbs to peer pressure (“if everyone jumped off a bridge would you?” “Probably”) - thinking of ending her life, a rash decision, because she is now experiencing bullying. Coming back to Ram consistently even though he just gets drunk when they date and there’s even a gross substance thrown on her, never calling him out or just dumping him after he tries to “force” her. She seemed like an unhealthy ISFJ to me. 6w7 too, if not 6w7 then 9w1, but I was seeing 6w7. She’s hard bc I feel like we don’t get to know her well enough to really type her

-Joanie from Happy Days is an ESFP. Marion is an ESFJ 2 (I was thinking 2w1 but in the later seasons her wing isn’t as clear.) Howard is an xSTJ.

Sorry I’ve been really obsessed with heathers lately, I’ll post some more of mine soon!

I’m an ISFJ-T, though I’m not entirely sure what that means. I’m deep in emotions at the moment and have my first therapy session next week. I hope to gain the tools needed to break free from guilt, overwhelming fear, attachment, and disappointment. Any advice?

I feel like I can type most peoples personality after being around them for a short period

I believe that INFPs are most attracted to ENFPs and INTJs. As an ISFJ, I agree ISFJs are most attracted to ESTPs (I’ve been watching Happy Days and am crazy attracted to Fonzie even though I think Henry Wilmer was average because of his personality.) My longest strongest crush in high school was on an ESTP 6w7 who actually wasn’t a great person. As someone who’s afraid to step outside the box I guess I just really like the confidence and boldness of ESTPs I’ve met - they are confident and bold yet have that tertiary Fe to soften it out a bit, so they don’t just upset me like ExTJ’s sometimes will. ESFP’s are most attracted to ISFJs and ISTPs. ISFPs are most attracted to ENTJ’s, and ISTPs to ESTPs.

I'm an ENFP M (33) Just got myself with the most wonderful and loving ISFJ F (27). Since we're very fairly on in this relationship, I'd like to understand your type better, in what ticks you off.

As an ENFP, I can get too intense and clingy sometimes, and though she communicated that she's alright with it, I am afraid that it'll push her away in the long run by being too demanding of her time and attention. She'll told me that she wants to love me in ways important to me and she'll tell me if i'm going overboard, but knowing ISFJs you're the type to put others first.

Although she often told me, everything's alright, I still have this fear that one day she'll eventually "process" her feelings and feel bad about everything. I am asking this question in order to prevent that from happening, because I love her and I wanted to love her in ways important to her as well.

Thanks.

This article on the link between limerence (basically a very intense & unrequited romantic infatuation) & MBTI states that the types most susceptible to experiencing it are INFJ, INFP, INTJ & ENFP. ISFJs on the other hand are said to be one of the types that are least likely to experience limerence.

I'm not sure whether to believe these results, so figured I'd start a thread/poll to see how susceptible ISFJs are to limerence. Do you experience this & what are your thoughts?

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