So, I have major depressive disorder, which makes it extremely hard to have the motivation to do anything. In fact, most of the time I only brush my teeth every 3 weeks. But for the past few days, I’ve been actually brushing my teeth!! And I’m so proud of myself for it!!

I was raised by cult members. The kind who follow a preacher around and “homeschool” their kids. My twenties were a god damned disaster, always on the verge of a felony or at the door of a mental health institution. If the Marine Corps didn’t take me in 2009, I’d have frozen to death a long time ago.

I’ve become an artist and I’m now living on a lifelong financial grant. My only relationships are my two cats and I am both homebound and handicapped (my folks didn’t treat some breaks in my left leg, and after my time in the infantry the entire dang leg started to wear out).

It’s Thanksgiving, today. My parents have the audacity to invite their children over for holidays and whatnot, despite being the same people they’ve always been (if not worsened by age and a lifelong commitment to ignorance). Not me. I’m in another region of the globe, and I don’t speak to those people anymore.

I woke up today and here is the first thing I heard, “I’m not out there looking for a booty call.” It was the voice of a woman I don’t know; she was speaking to a group of women in the driveway next to my house (a casual conversation about seeking female friends and receiving unwanted male attention). My brain judged the situation, thought about the social dynamic I bring to the table, and I made a choice. I opened that window up, poked my head of long, curly hair out into the morning air, and I said, “Is this a bad time?”

It was not a bad time. 💪🏻

I raised my credit score over 300 points in a single year of actually trying wow. I wasn't raised with the proper financial knowledge but I learned and finally got it up. ☺️

Quite a few accomplishments for me here. I sincerely thought 2022 was gonna be a shitty year since I ended last year separated from the loml, and started this year without him too (just LDR).

Near EOM January 2022, I bought a digital tablet, hoping to make some art on it.. mainly for trying out Creative Arts Therapy. By February, I've already been in psychotherapy for 2 months already, but despite that, my mental state was still very bad. I was always dissociated, or at least trying to, I was always trying to drown myself in music and art. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. By Valentines, I got promised a date, but got stood up (for a valid reason). I felt so alone and lonely that I went on needafriend subreddit looking for someone to talk to. Sure enough I did gain a new friend, which slowly turned into a new best friend. We have a lot in common and still talk about lots of those common things to this day. My mood eventually lifted as I got into a new friend group through that friend and also got put into an antidepressant which helped my mood and productivity overall. I was no longer feeling like a loser, I no longer felt so much like a failure. (Note: I've been feeling neglected for 6 months already by this time, it just happened to be that I couldn't deal with myself on my own anymore that I looked for help.)

Here comes the wins I've gained over the past 3 months. By early March, I was done with my first ever sticker collection. What was supposedly bought for just doing expression art through Creative Arts Therapy turned into making sticker designs, now I have 60+ in that sticker collection (you can see the top 5 here). I also gained a new best friend, that's always good. From being in such high productive mood, one day I just decided to look for jobs to apply to again. And I did. I got a few interviews, there was a specific interview which got me through to the final interview and then onto the trial test and tomorrow, I'll know if I get it or not. Whether I do or I don't, the fact that I got through all these without much of an anxiety attack (unlike what happened to me last year when I last tried) is an accomplishment already.

I've also turned my sticker designs into for sale items both digitally and physically and have been constantly making and posting content about it. I've become a content creator, showing (off) what I do and how proud of it I am. Being a beginner artist whose talent was never honed as a kid (I graduated business because parents said that's where the money is), this is a surprise for me. I always thought I was just your average person, not so creative, not so analytical, but when I picked up the pen and tablet, I'm suddenly a creative person.. a person I never thought I'd be.

I'm just really proud of myself, my small wins that turned into a clumped accomplishment. And I wanted to share it here, where I know people can be nice without a hidden agenda (aka how much money I'll make). That's all, thank you for reading.

I graduated in December with my BSc. Ever since I have been applying to at least 2 jobs a day, following up, networking (online because of COVID) attending free webinars, working on keeping my skills I learned fresh etc. Rejected time in and time again. However, I had an interview last Friday and within a few hours after I got an offer! Up until this point I have only had jobs, now I have a career! I just am so pumped, like I never thought this day would come!!

Last night I went with my roommate and a couple of his friends out to a music festival that I have really been looking forward to. I didn't know any of them beforehand, except my roommate and one mutual friend and it made me feel a bit excluded when we started dancing. It only got worse when we switched rooms to a different kind of music that somehow unsettled me. Additionally, my roommate disappeared on me and his friends didn't really care about me either. I was feeling so forgotten and insignificant and alone and among all those happy, dancing people, it hit me hard. I was on the verge of tearing up when my roommate suddenly appeared again and asked me whether I was alright. I was not, but he just accepted that and went back to dancing.

This was when I had enough of all of them and I decided to either go to a different location or go home early. Finally, I went back to the mainstage, where I enjoyed the music much much more and just started dancing on my own, still alone and a bit lonely but better. After some time, the music started to reach me and I didn't even realize how time flew by. I finally ended up leaving only when they closed the place down in the morning and I was so so very proud of myself for not being disheartened by my group. Thanks to that, I got to dance a whole night away and it feels as if I made a big step forward. I showed myself that I can get myself out of saddening situations and that I deserve better. Thanks me!

tl;dr: I got excluded from the group I was supposed to spend the night with and decided to ditch them to spend the night dancing on my own and I am so proud of my independence.

I’ve never been super productive, but even more so in the last few months. I would often just mope, wander around and stuff. But today i had a ton of shit to do, and i did the majority of it. My French book is quite boring, but i pushed through the chapter. I wrote emails, and started a lab report. If i can do it, then you can too.

This is super wholesome! I just stumbled upon this from /r/newreddits

It started as a small silly idea, as I just wanted somewhere that was more easy-to-use and which more features than Wordpress. So I searched around and found Wix (lol this isn't an advert, I promise) .

At first, it was just a bit of fun and somewhere to put everything I was doing, but as I kept doing more and more, and creating new pages, redesigning etc, it grew into the website it is today.

I guess I was apprehensive before I did it, I'm not sure why, but I always wanted to do it, but just felt like I couldn't pull it out. I can happily say that it's very easy to achieve, and we have many options out there for places you can build your website.

https://www.christianreeve.com/

For context, maladaptive daydreaming (MD) is when people create very intricate daydreams which they can get lost into. It can greatly affect your mental health, productivity, social life, and sleep schedule. Personally, it makes me feel very depressed and anxious among other things. So one of my resolutions for 2020 is to stop MD. I’ve gotten a head start on it, and while i may relapse quite a bit, i’m making progress. And i can see some results!!! TLDR: i’m taking care of mental health. Link to MD subreddit https://www.reddit.com/r/MaladaptiveDreaming/

Ok so a bit of background. I started acting professionally back in March 2019. I was always a creative person (creating music, poetry etc) but I never imagined myself as an actor. After the first short film I filmed, I was addicted! I spent the majority of the year acting in everything I could find: short films, independent films, commercials, movies - you name it!

Sometime in the summer I restarted Youtube again (something I always wanted to do, but never had any good ideas to really make a serious go of it) and I started releasing music, vlogs, exploring videos, and my acting appearances. During that time I had the idea for my own series, and I started filming and writing simultaneously (I don't recommend this method aha).

This culminated in my ''Flip Of A Coin'' series, a short series that I am extremely proud of, as it marks the beginning of my behind-the-camera work, as well as the continuation of my acting aspirations and work. I've received a lot of positive feedback for it, and as a result, I decided to start writing a season 2, as well as a short film for the series.

This time it will be much more planned out haha! But all things considered, I think it turned out pretty well. Let me know what you all think!

What is Flip Of A Coin?

A short story told through vlogs. Kevin is just a normal everyday guy, but he has a dark secret, a secret he's not even aware of, that will change his life forever.....

WATCH HERE: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cRatTm43wOE&list=PL9rv3fsvP7K7yjpVWAHEAIOmKr_zoappQ

Share everything that made you proud. Spread some appreciation.