I (M23) am dating my partner (38M). We have known each other for one year and have been officially dating for about 6 months. We originally met on tinder, went on our first date a couple of weeks later and have been talking since then. We’ve travelled together a few places here and there and I have really enjoyed that. I like how open, easygoing, and intelligent he is in addition to his kindness. Because of our age gap, we are on different paths in life. He has his doctoral degree and good job, a home, and is very stable. I am finishing my undergraduate degree, live at home, and work for a big corporation (part-time). We have already had the conversation about sharing a home together within the next few years and he’s said he could see us married in five years.

There was a situation back in September where I found out he’d been conversing with other people on tinder and had been sorta entertaining conversations with other guys and even though there wasn’t any evidence of him meeting them or any evidence of conversations that were sexually explicit, it did hurt my feelings and make me feel insecure and l lost some trust from him. When we talked about it he mentioned that he wasn’t fully confident in us being long term and that he was scared that if I left, he would be all alone again. We’ve moved on, he’s apologized, he’s held himself accountable, and that’s that. However, with it being recent I do think about it occasionally and that does bother me a little. Again, I don’t have any evidence of him like, going on a date with someone, sleeping with them, or anything similar, but to be on a dating app (tinder) while being in a relationship to me is a no no.

I’m a very reflective person and this is my first serious relationship that I have brought a lot of fullness and intention to. We have similar values, good chemistry, and we do feel love for each other. I am a person that likes a clear sight on where things are going and sometimes I may not always know!

Any thoughts? I’d much appreciate it.

We originally made a compromise that’d we’d both be verse with one another. Long story short, right before 3 months hit, we broke it off.

He questioned whether or not he’d be willing to switch for however long the relationship lasted and we both agreed we couldn’t do it.

Romantically and emotionally, everything clicked, but sexually it did not. I feel so sad because my bf from this morning is now my ex. Any advice or tips will help.

I feel crazy right now. I 28 y/o M seem to be falling in love after 2 dates with 30M. I have no idea what’s going on and my brain is spinning. I need help understanding this.

Back story is I dated 1 guy for most of my adult life 19-27 y/o. He was a total douche canoe. I typically keep men at an arms length and ghost if they get too close because I’m honestly terrified and too traumatized to date again after my last relationship.

Last weekend I met this guy off grindr we chatted all day he seemed really cool, he’s wildly attractive so we met at a bar with the intent of hooking up. I ended up staying the night (which was not the plan) and the ln spent the entire next day exploring our city -I probably left at like 10pm. We had so much fun. This weekend I helped him move. Same thing was just supposed to be like 3-4 hours hanging out. But yet again 1 day turned into 2. I feel like I’m falling in love. I’m so confused??? How can you fall in love after 2 weekends??? Is this crazy??? This feels insane. I’ve never ever ever developed feelings this fast. What is going on?? Can anyone help please. I told him I liked him. Should I not have done that??? He said he liked me too. I’m so confused appreciate y’all.

I’m sorry this is about being single in a relationship sub, I tried to post in a more appropriate Sub but it wasn’t working.

Exiting a two year relationship with (29M). My romantic and sexual needs were not met, communication was poor, I let my goals slide, I never put myself first. Now I wanna be single, focus on my goals, prioritize myself, but also get my sexual needs met! I have a lot of love to give, but I need to learn how to love myself. He was my first relationship and first sexual partner I consented too… Any thoughts on going forward personally or sexually is appreciated.

For a little context I’m still healing from an injury that prevents me from bending, lifting, walking or sitting for long, working… so it will be a while before I can actually meet anyone. But I’m on the apps anyway just because I can be now, but also to look around, make future connections, friend connections, I’m new to this city/state, the only person I hung out with here was my ex, I want some fun in my life.

On said apps I met a fella who Is a lot like myself, caring, similar position in bed, similar bodies, hesitant to use apps, lacking in sexual satisfaction. We agreed that being fwb would be good for us to try new things and have needs met judgment free. My hindrance is that I expressed what I’m looking for several times, and while he says he understands that I need to heal physically first and that he’s an adult and understands the nature of what we’d be doing, he keeps making it about wether I like him or not, talking like we’ll be exclusive. I find myself back to wondering if I’m saying the right things and annoying him when I repeat expectations “yea. I got it.“ Am I just being naive, is that something I should even be doing rn? I think a level of trust before relations is best for me rn. Or is it still a good Idea as long I stay firm on boundaries and expectations? The last thing I want to do is lead someone on. Mind you it’s only been a week of talking.

Oh, I fully understand the need to practice safety on all fronts as well, I’m good there.

Hi all, I’m wondering If this would be a good place to ask advice about being newly single/getting back out there/ FWB, or if someone could direct me to a more appropriate page? I could use some guidance in navigating single life and staying safe (mostly mentally safe, I thinkI get the physical haha) thanks in advance and good luck out there!

I really don’t know where to begin I really don’t even know what tos I don’t know how to articulate what’s in my brain to paper.

It’s been 10 years since Ernest and I have been married.10 long hard lonely sad years! Why do I still think of him everyday? Why can’t I move on? Why does he have a stronghold in my heart?

Is it becuase I loved him with every fiber of my being? I’m just so lost and confused! I seriously want to be hypnotized and my brain rest so I can go off in life happy I miss my happy self! I need help processing all the trauma I’ve been through in my life! I want to be excited about life! I want to be in a relationship have kids and just rock out with my cock out from time to time and not feel guilty

Hi guys, need a little help, me '32M' and my partner '37M', have had a huge fallout due to no communication and feeling distant with one another, we live and work together, which we have done for 7 years nearly 8 so understand that sometimes we need our own space, For the past few months it hadn't felt like a relationship which we both agree on, just someone sleeping on the otherside of the bed if you get what i mean (no contact) After somedays have past we have slightly talked. And I found out that he has messaged his and told him about the situation, which i can't get my head aroud of why he'd contact his ex, On adding on to contacting his ex His ex has offered him to come and stay down south for a few days and try consort his head out, But he has told me that he might consider staying down there, My partner does want to meet up and talk but after finding this out I don't know what to do or think about this situation Please help Thank you

Hi everyone. M26 here. Posting here for the very first time, and it might be a pretty long one, although I'll try my best to keep it as brief as possible. I'm just looking for advice/clarification as I'm not quite sure what's going on anymore.

About a year ago I accidentally met this guy who's 2x older than me. I've always had friends much older than myself, and some of them are my closest mates, so relatability is not an issue. Regarding this guy — we get on really well and have a lot in common despite having grown up in different countries and eras, many years apart.

He's been single for well over a decade and said he wasn't really worried about it as it didn't matter that much to him. We initially met for a hookup which went really well (both enjoyed it), and for some reason from that moment we added each other on social media and messengers, and agreed to meet again. We've met up several times since then, and every time was fantastic. It wasn't just about sex — we went out to restaurants/bars and had great conversations, did loads of different things at his place. Most conversations were meaningful, too.

The thing is we're currently living in different countries (due to work), but I do visit him whenever I can. He seems willing to visit me too, and I hope he will.

The thing is that he definitely prefers face-to-face interactions over online chats and is quite introverted. Has a very small group of friends, but doesn't see them too often. Not on very good terms with family either. He's super nice, quick-witted and smart though, has many interests, most of which are the same as mine.

When we catch up irl he's like an angel — very considerate, chatty and generally nice, always up for something. Once when I saw him I got him a very small, simple and not very meaningful present, but he was excited and happy like a child. Everything just goes perfectly, and we're always on the same wavelength.

However, he seems to be an entirely different person online. Reserved, not chatty at all (despite claiming the opposite). His messages are short, and it seems like he doesn't really want to engage in a conversation, unless I'm about to come visit him or do something for him. Seems like he's generally like that.

Lately I've felt like we'd started to 'drift apart', but not quite literally. When I said to him that I wasn't sure when exactly we'd see each other again, he promised to keep in touch. Guess what? It's almost always me who checks on him and messages first. Lately his messages have become even shorter and less 'eager', if that's the right word. I'm not quite sure why — I can't remember having said/done anything wrong, even though we're both overthinkers.

He's never been very active on social media, but when he's not in a good mood, he just hardly goes online. He knows he can rely on me as I'm always there for him if he needs to offload or seeks help/advice. I just don't feel like I can do the same, and I don't know if he's there for me. If he's had a bad experience or something which had led to him being upset, he doesn't really tell me much.

Again, in real life it's totally different. He's very bubbly and generally a great listener, perfect communicator. I remember him telling me to move to his country (wasn't related to him, just generally, but I think he wanted me to move, so that we could meet up more often). Last time we met he seemed a little stressed and depressed (had a lot of stuff to sort out at work), but still tried his absolute best to be as great as he usually is.

Anyway, lately I made him a very lovely, meaningful present. He told me he’d got it. Said it was great and confirmed that he liked it after I asked him. That’s it. He loves sex (and I don't mind that at all), so when I send him a sexual message, he's more eager to chat, but lately even that has gone a bit downhill. I don't know what's going on and would like to hear your thoughts.

I can't say I'm looking for anything, but he's a great person and I really enjoy his company (he claims to really enjoy mine, too), so of course I'd like to stay in touch and meet up whenever possible. I'm not asking for more from this connection, however, I've invested quite a bit in it. I just want to know what that kind of behaviour could mean as I'd never experienced anything like that before. Happy to provide further details if that can help you get a clearer picture of the whole thing.

It has now been more than a year since I was broken up with.

I haven't so much as kissed anybody since, and I still think about what happened every single day.

I only came out at 29, and I completely idealised the first guy I found. I dated him for only 3 months so it was barely a relationship, but I thought we had a special connection and that he really liked me.

So he broke up with me, as he was entitled to do. But for some reason I am still longing for him terribly and I am not interested in anybody else.

He did hurt me a lot - he suddenly dumped me immediately after sex at a time when I was struggling with coming out to my family. He then immediately started hooking up with loads of different men, when to my knowledge he hadn't ever done that before. That part destroyed my confidence and feeling of sexual appeal.

He didn't want to be with me, that's fine. But I thought he might have reconsidered or apologised in some way? But I haven't heard a single thing from him. He doesn't look like he's suffered any consequences either, I seem to be the only one who was hurt by that "breakup"

I have now matched with HUNDREDS of guys on all the dating apps. My profile looks good. I'm 6"2, I workout and have a great job. But I don't want to meet with any of them at all. I always find excuses not to.

I feel like it's inevitable that they will just use me and nothing is going to last. What is the point of it all? A hookup is too high risk and I would definitely feel used by that. I might as well just jerk off as do that.

Maybe this is because I came out late and unfortunately fell very hard for someone who wasn't in the same place as me.

I fantasise about contacting him or bumping into him in the street. I keep hoping he might see my profile on Hinge and realise how good I am.

This is all completely ridiculous and I'm still trapped in it after more than a year. People say "you'll be fine" but I have hardly moved on at all.

What am I doing wrong and what can I do to resolve this?

So, as the title says: I have a homemade gift, a book of photos and authentic poems, for my boyfriend. We’re celebrating 6 months soon and this is both of our first major relationship and I love him. My question is: is this acceptable? I have no idea what he is doing for a gift but I want to make sure this is something stellar.

TLDR: I made a book of poetry as a 6 month anniversary gift, is this acceptable?

It started picture perfect. The man of my dreams [M33] and I [M32] met on an actual dating app. From the moment I first saw and met him I was head over heels.

Things were going great. No, things were unbelievably fantastic. Great sex, good company, and a soulmate finding his soulmate moments happening left and right.

Almost a year in and he decided to change jobs and move cities. I was devastated. I had just purchased a house and it seemed impossible to move cities and change jobs for myself. But, I was willing and managed to do it for both a change in my life and to be with my love.

We kept things separate when we moved as the relationship was still young. Things were alright at this point, he was still dealing with a lot of depression and anxiety from his job and coworkers. He was more preoccupied on keeping a float with his personal life and struggling to balance a relationship. I did my best to be supportive, but I was also dealing with depression and anxiety from a SA. I was going to to therapy, taking medications and doing my best to keep my life moving.

A few more months in and the same occurrence of his work became too stressful and once again his coworkers were the worst. He quit. No plan. I was once again trying my best to be supportive. He was looking for jobs with no avail. Until… he turned down a job from another state halfway across the country. But, being the person that I am I asked him to call back and long story short we visited the state for the interview and he got the job.

I was fortunate my job was remote. So we moved.

We had moments of a serene new life. But, it happened yet again. The coworkers, the environment, it was all going wrong for him. More depression and anxiety came. I was starting to feel even more alone in a state where I already had no one. Now I was trying to stay afloat, meds, therapy and all that good stuff. I was trying my best to be supportive in the ways I could. He never sought therapy, medications, well… he self medicated with THC. Which was like a constant bandaid.

A year and few months in our landlord decides to sell the house which caused a huge distress more-so for him than me and we needed to find a new place. I’ll skip all the in between, but my damage control was buying a house. It wasn’t ideal and I don’t think we were necessarily ready, but I was done seeing him in this constant state of distress, depression, and anxiety.

He left me alone for our first Christmas at our house. His family invited him back home and I encouraged him to go. Once again I was alone. A familiar feeling that kept me more company than he did.

No big deal, he’ll come back. In between here and there, he ends up moving to a different branch which seems to help a little bit. Another blow hits, one of his family members suddenly passes away.

I couldn’t travel with him because of my dogs and finances. I was now dealing with another fire trying my best to be supportive. Little did I know there was a massive snowstorm about to hit. He left for the funeral out of state. I was accompanied by my close friend, loneliness.

The storm hit and I had never been through anything like that in my life. I was used to heatwaves, not snow storms. I was staring out the window when a branch snapped the power line and I knew it was game over. I was alone. No alternative heat source and with the risk of trees falling onto the house. I was truly alone. I had nobody, but the dogs. My partner unavailable, in a state of disarray. There was no driving out of this. I had to take care of the dogs digging out areas for them to go potty. I had to dig my way out of the driveway to pick him up from the airport.

When he got back I broke internally. No visible signs. I wasn’t crying. I was stressed and depressed having gone through a hurricane of snow all alone. I didn’t mention it to him, because he had just gotten back from a funeral, but my heart weighed heavier when he got back. I was actually more stressed because of him. I was doing damage control again left and right. I needed my partner, I myself was broken and had nothing left give. But, I went into survival mode after being in survival mode.

That’s when I knew I couldn’t be there anymore. I missed my family and friends. I asked him to move back with me and he refused. I knew it wasn’t going to be immediate if he had said yes and I was okay with that. It might’ve taken 1-2 years, but I would’ve survived… for him, for us, for me.

He said no. He wanted to stay. After all that… after I uprooted my life three times for this man. He couldn’t do it for me. Even though he had used the line “it didn’t matter as long as we were together.” Clearly it did.

We had a house together and I agreed to pay for 6 months even after I left. Why, I don’t know. I guess I’m just too fuckin nice. He didn’t want to sell it. He didn’t want to move. So I paid. I moved. I left A LOT of my belongings behind. Things that we purchased together. Because the cost to ship vs buy all over again was less expensive.

Despite all the hell I put up with. I think I will always love him. I don’t know if he was narcissistic or simply depressed or both. But, I’m angry that he couldn’t move once for me.

I guess I wanted to let this all out before the year ends. Because, I’m doing better in my overall health and personal life. There’s not a day that doesn’t go by that I don’t think about him. But, I’m pressing forward. I have A LOT of love to give and I will patiently wait again for the right person to come into my life.

Goodnight, starlight.

I (21m) was having a really big breakdown, my life at uni had ended and I was under several pressures. I asked my partner (23m non binary) for a break. They didn't want to as they don't feel like being on the edge of a break up, this is based on past experiences. This is my first proper relationshipbut not theirs. Theirs went into a break and ended after. I had to take around a month to talk to them again. By that time they had had hookups and made a fwb . I am uncomfortable with them trying to keep this friend around, they met them around 2 weeks after the breakup. I have had some major anxiety about this mostly from intrusive thoughts. To me sex is really important and valuable, but to them they can defer casual and romantic. They don't want to get rid of the friend cause when the breakup happened he comforted them. He seems like a nice dude but I keep flipping between comfortable and uncomfortable, to the point I have been having stress sickness for weeks throwing up. I never wanted to break up only a small break, I hoped they would not sleep with anyone, I was wrong. They don't like the idea of a partner controlling who they are friends with but I can't control how I feel about it. They don't want to be left on standby in case I do break up with them after a proper break we have established now. I known about their previous promiscuous life, I was okay with it and any friends from that time. I'm just not okay with this new FWB. Any help or advice if this is going to work.

So my husband and I are together for eight years and married this year in may. He went on a business trip for two days and right before he left I found a bootle of poppers. That is not the problem. We use a completely different brand. While he was gone I looked further and found a stash of poppers / condoms and multiple xxxl dildos that I had no idea about. We are pretty open about our feelings and desires and I know he would never cheat. But I just don’t know how to deal with what I found.

How do I start that kind of conversation?

I have always wanted to be a puppy. Because I just want to give up control (and realize how unsafe that is). But I'm so tired of having to defend everyone else in my life. I would love to just be a good boi for someone else. That would protect me for once. Yet I know that no one will protect me. I have always dreamed about just being a good house husband and wake my "owner" up in bed with breakfast. Either way I can't decide if this is just desperate or a dream or just not realistic.

Question though. Is it just me? or if a boy gave you a collar with his number if you ever needed. Would you marry him? (I probably would)

A FWB (37M) recently moved to Seattle, and I (36M) took it hard after I realized I caught the feels for him. I confessed this to him and he said he's not interested in anything except FWB. But then a little bit later, he ended the FWB/sexual component and said he felt weird about it after my confession, since in his words, "you would go through so much pain knowing I was sleeping with additional people." But, he wanted to remain friends. I told him his rationale didn't compute because I'd have to deal with that either way, so removing the benefits gives me the short end of the stick in that context.

He held firm to the no benefits, so I initially ended contact with him and told him that I needed some space, but then he texted me a few weeks later and we subsequently agreed on a platonic friendship. (The connection was really strong and I think we genuinely like each other as friends).

Ever since then I feel like there's a lot of assymmetry in the power dynamic between us, and I'm not feeling like an equal. I'm self conscious about initiating texts - I text probably once or twice a week and he always responds quickly. He also initiates, although I don't record the frequency maybe slightly under my rate. He also keeps checking things like my LinkedIn.

On my last communication with him, I asked him if I text too much and if so put the ball in his court to initiate going forward. And he said "don't worry about that, I understand."

But I dunno .... If this is a friendship, there aren't any invites to visit in Seattle, and we had always discussed I would visit before he moved. I have not mentioned that im a bit hurt about that or pressed the matter. Id still be willing to go without the expectation of benefits.

Re: the interactions, does it look like Im friends with a text message service now/permanently? Are there serious red flags here regarding the intentions to maintain a real friendship, or does he just need time to process the post-feelings confession dynamic between us? (I told him 3 months ago).

I (24M) have been dating a 22 year old for a couple of months now. I don’t have a job or a car right now but he does, I am still in college also. I kind of feel like I am holding him back from experiencing a relationship that he deserves because we live an hour and 30 minutes from each other so we don’t get to see each other often due to my lack of “resources “. I am hopefully gonna be financially stable in 3 years but I feel like he’s too young to be in a relationship like this. We argue alot also over silly things and I think my insecurities are playing a part in that too. I am thinking of breaking things off with him so he can find someone better. Should I?

Eight years in a relationship.

My (31M) mother loves me too much. She's jealous of my partner (30M) and, to certain degree, of my mother in law, though.

It turns out my mother in law is gonna divorce due to economic and psychologic abuse. She said she could live with my partner and me once we both have enough money to purchase a house (we live at our parents right now). She could take care of many chores... or at least to be there everyday.

My partner said she could, of course. I got totally speechless...

My mother in law doesnt want us to adopt a child. She feels the baby must have a father and a mother. I really like her, but I do not want her to be around every day...

Here comes my mother again who says I'm a "wuss". First of all, she doesn't understand why my mother in law wants to break up afte 30 years (it hurt me to hear it). Apart from that disagreement, she said why she must stay with us all time and why I'm always spending New Year's Eve, all Saints day and other special days there...

It is true...my partner and I do live kinda away (an hour per road) and want to be together all the weekend and he is more familiar than me and MY FAMILY (with whom I have zero contact practically) by far... Secondly, my mother is quite annoying (sorry mom), she is always complaining about everything such as me being gay (and my brother too) "I won the lottery twice with you both, sons" and is full of envy and a totally depressed woman... so I take those weekends as a breath.

I used to stay one weeked at home and the other one in my partner's town, but since he is working even farther, I stay in a place each week (and if I have to give one away, I giving in staying at home).

All in all, I feel even if she speaks out of anger and envy, she is kinda right. I do not like what I am seeing... I dont want to live with my mother in law or having her around every damn day... I want to live with my partner on our own (what my mother isnt able to understand "is there some complain at home?"). They can, of course, visit us, but let us space, please...

Finally, my partner is suffering too much from this divorce. He and her mother are taking some antidepressant due to my father in law's henious behaviour... I don't feel like I must be another stone in the road and complaing about her mother in law; I understand she needs us and I want to help her too (I already do it), but in the end, once she is ready and has healed all she can, she must learn to live her life... she hates to be a servant for my father in law. Is she gonna become one for us now?

Thanks for reading me. I wanted to vent a little bit too. Thanks...

Hello! I'm not the biggest reddit user so I hope that this reaches people.

To start this off, I am 19 and turning 20 in march 2025, and the guy I have feelings for recently turned 29 in October 2024.

Me and him met in a program we are both doing regarding mental health that I won't speak much on due to legal reasons. (nothing high-risk or life threatening)

We met each other about 3 weeks ago. I started the program on a Tuesday. He was 2 days into it at the time.

It started out me just finding him cute and keeping an eye on him which then lead to us talking during our breaks and getting along throughout the days. The more time went by the more I thought about him and ended up finding myself wanting to be around him when I had the choice and missing his presence when he wasn't around.

During the first weekend I found myself still thinking of him a lot and realized... damn... I have a crush...

I can't talk about him when it comes to processing my emotions in group, so it makes it tricky to seek advice there... My solution to this was to use a past crush and frame it in a way that is very similar to what I am currently going through and that has helped a good amount since I've been able to get feedback from therapists and peers.

In general I am coming here to seek advice on if I should tell him how I feel after we finish this program if I still have these feelings. I made a playlist that I would like to give him with songs that relate to how I feel about him, and I also want to talk with him about it and see what he has to say.

The age gap between us and the things we are up to in life are very different but I think I still want to express how I feel so that I don't regret not saying anything and suffering the heartbreak of not knowing or trying to do anything about my feelings when I had a chance...

There are many thoughts clouding my view of this whole situation. So getting other people's opinions would help a lot.

If you read this far thank you.

I’ve(M27-vers top) been with my boyfriend(M30- bottom)for 4 years. He is my first boyfriend and i am hoping my last.

Some backstory: I lost 100lbs before we met so i struggled to meet guys due to lack of self confidence and also terrible gay standards.

When we first got together- we had anal sex often and it slowly became less and less. I became insecure and started wondering why? He talked a big game about how he loved bottoming and then it just felt like we had anal sex TWO or THREE TIMES in the time span of a year.

Throughout this time, i brought up my insecurities and questioned why our sex was mainly oral. He would get defensive and say that he hated dueching, wasn’t taking enough fiber, just did not enjoy the “getting ready” aspect of it.

I told him fiber was enough. This conversation always ended in tears because i made him feel insecure. It would end with both of us insecure about our sex life. I offered to bottom but it just never felt like he enjoyed that experience.

Slowly, i dropped the idea of us having anal sex- it would just make him super insecure and it always felt like i was pressuring someone to do something they dont want to do- not a good feeling AT ALL. Even asking him if he just lost interest in anal sex has made him insecure.

i love him, we have a great life together, and anal sex is just a part of the aspect of the sexual experience. But i still want to know why its just not happening?

I’ve become more insecure over the last year again. We have only had anal sex once in the last year.

Is this normal? How do I bring this conversation back up without starting an argument? Or should i interpret this as him just not having any interest in anal sex?

I’ve (m25) been talking to a guy (m26) for about 1.5 months. We’ve been on 2 dates in that time and live about 1hr away from each other. Overall talking is alright but we play overwatch together and FaceTime pretty regularly. The issue I’ve had recently though is when we first started talking he mentioned that there are days when his depression acts up and just needs time for himself. Understandable. I had asked him at the time though if that happens, would he tell me ahead of time, to which he said he would. First two dates were great, hung out for the whole day and even slept over (per hour drive) and didn’t do anything overly intimate beyond kissing and cuddling. It’s been about 2 weeks since we’ve seen each other and we had planned to meet Sunday today and prob have him sleep over and have brunch Monday morning. 1st two dates I went to his so he wanted to come to mine this time around. Friday evening he had mentioned he wanted to take Saturday evening for himself and I, understanding what that meant, let him recharge. Saturday while he’s at work we were talking and he even mentioned how he wanted me to save him a piece of the dessert I was making. After he gets off, I no longer hear from him the rest of the day which was expected. However, since we had discussed meeting Sunday morning, I attempted calling and texting him every few hours on Sunday without any response, but he’s reposting things on tik tok. My last message was “talk to me when you’re ready. I’m here to listen” So here’s the dilemma, should I just wait and give him that benefit of the doubt knowing he’s battling his depression and stand by him or do I move on. It’s so early in that I feel that the morally right thing would’ve been for him to at least give me the courtesy of saying he’s not feeling up for our date, which he knows I’ve been planning and had bought tickets for our evening plans (I bought on Friday night after he confirmed he wanted to come Sunday). I know depression is a mental disability and has its ups and downs but he also knows I have anxiety which has been flaring up now cuz I feel like I’ve been blown off. I’ve told him recently I was serious about seeing where this connection would lead and he responded the same, but idk if I can continue with someone who blows me off like this without any warning. I’m wondering if he’s just ghosting me now or if he’s going through it (he’s told me what has been triggering the recent bouts) but I’m unsure of where to go from here.

I’m 22 and never truly been in a gay relationship as I’ve only come out this past year. I started dating recently but not enough to do anything spicy. I’m 6’2” and 290 pounds so heavier set and I don’t know how I feel about topping but at the same time I don’t know how I feel about bottoming and I’m just worried that when something spicy happens I won’t want to because I don’t know what role I want to be. Has anyone gone through something similar and how did you get through it?

I (M32) ended my engagement to my LTR boyfriend of 8yrs two months ago. He and I had a myriad of issues, a lot of them due to us being in our early 20s at the time of dating and having not dated other men. We have shared a lot of experiences together but ultimately I knew us getting married was a bad idea. We are working on being friends, tho we are currently giving each other space with the exception of the occasional meme being sent via IG.

I am currently working on getting situated in my new place in a new town I moved to with him. To be clear, I have zero desire to date or get into another relationship. I need so much time to heal and sort through the mistakes I made in the relationship. However, I have had two occasions where a guy has flirted with me since the break up. I flirted back and I felt immediately guilty both times.

I'm a big nightlife person. I love to go out and dance or karaoke and I'm a big people person. If I'm at a bar alone, it's not long before I'm chatting up someone or vice versa. So the chances of this happening again are likely I guess. I want to know is it normal to feel guilty from receiving attention? Also, how long does this last? I think six months is solid time of self reflection before I start dipping my toes back in the water. But I won't even attempt to if this guilt persists.

Any advice? Is it all just a matter of "time heals all wounds" yada yada?

So I’m in a relatively new relationship and I can’t complain about him as an individual. Despite the title it’s not that we have a total lack of sexual connection or that the sex is bad. It just feels like something that could work better if that makes sense.

We’ve been dating for about 5/6 months and I think because I’ve been happy in other ways I didn’t take note of the fact the sexual side isn’t to my “liking”.

Part of the reason I don’t know how to approach it is because maybe a month or two in I tried to discuss what I’m into sexually with him and wanted him to open up about what he likes but he literally said - “nothing really”. IMO everyone has something, it doesn’t have to be a kink or fetish. So I felt awkward af revealing that stuff and basically getting no reaction. I was hoping at the minimum he might at least say I like the sound of or don’t like the sound of things I had mentioned. I definitely have got in my head a little bit about this because it kind of gave me the impression that he just doesn’t like talking directly about sex. I should also mention that the stuff I said to him that I like (nothing crazy btw) aren’t things I need all the time but without them being incorporated much at all I’m not really satisfied.

So one thing I noticed that I feel is missing is sexy flirting and innuendo, I try not to compare to the past too much but that aspect has come more naturally with others and I’m kind of realising it’s something I want from who I’m seeing. I did try to introduce that a few weeks ago via text by sending a suggestive meme but it fell flat to the point where he didn’t get I was being suggestive and asked me what that was about when we saw each other later in the day. Anyway I was hoping this would lead to more of a conversation and it did. Long story short - he said he doesn’t have much experience with that stuff but he’s not against us doing more of it (I think he also said it doesn’t come naturally to him)

I used this convo as an opportunity to say it’s important for us to talk about sex and I don’t want him to feel awkward about it. I did mention the time when I told him what I was into and how the reaction threw me a bit, but I tried to encourage him as well by telling him he does have stuff he’s into (judging by when we are intimate) he just probably doesn’t know how to verbalise them.

Something else that I’ve realised is that we have different drives. Which I know for a fact because in that convo he mentioned he’s like a 5/10, which concerned me a bit because I am quite sexual and I don’t want to feel like a pest.

I’d say 90% of the time when I stay over his we do something sexual but then I am a bit concerned that in the 5/6 months we’ve been dating we’ve only had penetrative sex maybe 5 times from memory. It’s important to note that his house is the family home so I get how that places restraint. He’s also the bottom so I know it takes more preparation for him but he’s never ready and never in the midst of us doing foreplay has he gone to douche, so sometimes I feel like he’s just not that into us doing d in a. Because we haven’t had much sex I do find myself feeling like my connection to him isn’t as strong as it could be. This is a big concern because it’s something I’ve only recently learnt about myself.

Anyway I want to have another conversation with him but I don’t want to damage progress that has been made because now this wouldn’t be the first time I’m mentioning something “missing” on the sex side. I’m not sure how experienced he is, but I get the impression not very much but I have definitely made an effort to let him know I can tell he’s becoming more confident in the physical bedroom.

I just think my past situations and relationships have been with guys who have been a bit more sexually forward but I do really like this guy and want things to work but I don’t know how I can try to get things on track without derailing them. Are there any questions you think I should be asking him also?

Edit: I think it might be important to note that although we haven’t had sex much in the time we’ve been seeing each other we do at least do foreplay most times I stay over

TLDR: new relationship is going good but the sexual side is a bit lacking. We’ve only had sex around 5 times in 5/6 months and things I think I need like sexual wants and banter are rare between us. I don’t think he’s as experienced as me and he has a lower drive. How can I address and improve the situation without ruining confidence I’ve seen him build.

My fiancé went on holiday this week. Day one, he emptied our joint account and told me that he was going to replace it when he got back to the hotel. It's been 7 days. I've asked him every day to put it back and he keeps saying "will do, just out at the moment" and stuff like that. It left me with no money to feed our pets, or for travel to work. I really want to believe that there's some innocent explanation but my friends are telling me to leave.

What do you all think?

Tl:dr general complaning about my love life (probably not worth the read)

I (34m) don't know what i am looking to accomplish with this or if its like yelling in to the void but, im so sick and tired of being single. To start, i have been single for 7 years now, my last relationship was about 2 years long. i (thought) i had fallen in love with this guy (he was 31 at the time and i was 27), when i met him, he was crashing on his buddies couch and was working to try and get back on his feet (never knew what led him to crashing on the couch). As we continued dating things started to snowball, (a quick run down) first he lost his job > gets asked to "move out" > ends up moving in with me and my family (mom / dad, both mid 50s at the time) > starts to financially abuse me > becomes occasionally physically abusive (i did the stupid thing and forgave it) > steals from me (money and marajuana) > hits me again and i call the police > he ended up getting booked but no jail> ends up on the streets gets a street bf and living "his best life" (his words)... As for me i spent a year after the relationship dead inside (still a bit dead / hollow) but i got back out there only going to bars, clubs, concerts and shows with friends. flirting with people (bi) being flirted with back and yet over the last 7 years no one wants to date me, or im told i wish i could find a guy like you (you know who's a guy like me? Me!!!). I think i should just give up the hope that someone special is out there for me. Now i know why hope was at the bottom of Pandora's box. Like i said i dont know what I want out of this but thanks for reading my ted talk... Lol

Edited for spelling mistakes

I am 27 years old and my partner of 6 years is 25. I love him very much and we are planning on taking the next step and getting engaged next year. I have a feeling he will want a prenup given our current finances (I make about 140k per year and he’s making over 600k now). To any other couples out there with a similar dynamic, how have you navigated this? Do you have any advice on going through this process?

My BF (m21) and I (m20) are both in college. We go to two separate universities but they’re only an hour apart. We’ve been dating a little over a year now, but for the last 6 months his sex drive has been very low. We’ve only actually had sex maybe 2-3 times in that time span and it’s beginning to take a toll on me. We’ve had numerous conversations about it where he’s explained it’s a lot more difficult for him to prepare (he strictly bottoms, I strictly top). I’ve done a lot of things to try and help him like finding advice online and buying him multiple douches that will work for him. But nothing still. He says that he just isn’t there mentally. We do other stuff , but without penetrative sex I feel so unfulfilled.

At this point I feel rejected by him. I have struggled with body image my whole life, and having him not want to have sex with me is so debilitating. I am finding myself not even being attracted to him anymore. And what’s worse is I feel terrible about it. I understand it’s difficult for him, but I feel so lonely and disconnected.

Our relationship is strong, but I feel like this one thing is breaking us. Especially since I feel so young and to have such a high sex drive and feel like I’m being rejected, it hurts sm.

Edit: I need advice please

Hi, My partner and I are in a long distance. We enjoy being together, it’s magical, but I also recognise a lot of narcissistic traits in him. I tried to talk to him about it, explain the situations, explain how he makes me feel etc. He “understands” for a minute. He constantly flips things around on me; I can never say any critic cuz he starts blaming me “I always make problems, I always act out etc.” I love him but I can’t be ok with this behaviour - and I’m trying to do my best to understand him and to make this work. Does anyone have any advices? Has anyone ever “successfully” dated someone like this? Help! 😭

Hi everyone! I'm M27. I'm Non-English native speaker, so there are many mistakes in the text. However, I tried my best.

I live in a small town, so I go to the nearest city sometimes to satisfy my sexual desire. And one day I met a guy (M28). And he crushed on me at first sight. Although he is quite handsome I did not feel the same. When I had returned to my town we continued our communication. I've never been in relationships before and his persistence confused me. I always stopped him gently when he was flirting with me.

Two weeks later he lost interest and fell in love with someone else but we keeped our communication as friends. And by that time, I got attached to him. So funny. I started to visit his city regularly just to spend time with him. And moreover, I confessed my feelings to him, but it was too late. As a result, we stayed as friends. I tried to support him when he talked about his problems with his boyfriends and I felt jealousy at the same time. I tried to sublimate all my bad feelings in casual relationships with random people but it destroyed me more.

After all, my friend found a new job and left his city. I had no chances but it was really hurt anyway. One day when my friend's heart was broken by his new boyfriend, he told me that he felt sorry for my feelings. So I lied to him that my feelings are cooled down. I still read his stories about love affairs, his working successeses and happy moments. I feel so depressed that it happens without me in his life. I have wild mix of emotions at once: love, envy, hate, desire to support him and selfpity. It is driving me mad, I'm exausted. So hard to admit that my one-sided love transformed to crazy obsession.

I know that I should let him go, I tried but I was always missing him, so I came back again and again. He is traumatized guy with some narcissism and an anxious-avoidant type of attachment, am I attracted by persons like him? Am I traumatized too? Because I know that he doesn't care about me and my life and it even doesn't make my mind clear. I feel his uncaring attitude to me, but I still don't want anyone but him.

I attempted to escape in hobbies and self-improvement. However, there is no energy for this. So, how do you deal with the same situations? I know that solution is to break any ties with him, but I still can't accept it.

Thank you for attention.

I had a 2 night sleepover with a dude one year older than me. He was the one to suggest it and rode a train for 4 hours just to see me. I felt like we were both a little interested in each other when I was just texting with him alot, but I didnt give it much thought since he is in a relationship (although kinda unhappy, very long distance etc.). It turned out pretty gay really quick when we did end up cuddling up really close and falling asleep basically intertwined by our limbs and heads more times than 2. He made the decision to sleep in my bed beforehand which kind of shocked me tbh, then later he was the one to pull me closer to him blah blah. I was feeling very close to him and really felt the romantic and sexual tension. We petted each other and all that. The back of my mind was reminding me that this dude has a BOYFRIEND yet me and him are doing stuff that should probably be couples only. We even got a little sexual but he pulled away. He admitted to trying to tease me with not wearing anything except underwear and stuff, I admit I did the same and worse at some point. What the hell is this? Am I an outlet for his physical needs currently? He told his bf all of this when he felt guilty and apparently its ok but obviously it cant happen again....?.?. what in the fuck? Am I just an ultra virgin or something.? Do I maybe have a chance with him tho cuz it was a wonderful experience,,, He wants to meet up again sometime but this time with boundaries, although he wants to keep cuddling and sleeping in one bed which is crazy to me.