Recently went through a bad bought of depersonalization, and I feel like the brain fog really got me. Usually, I feel like I’m on autopilot, unable to process but miraculously managing to go through daily tasks. This time was a bit different though, because I found myself being unable to process simple information. Reading sentences over and over, scanning websites repeatedly, staring at road signs for longer than necessary, all while still being uncertain of my comprehension.

Does anyone else have brain fog like this? What should I do from here?

Hi All,

I am new to Reddit and this is one of my first ever posts, so I apologize if this has been asked 1000 times before or if I am posting incorrectly. I (M28) wanted to reach out to the group to see if anyone has ever experienced a temporary increase in anxiety that has led to worsening derealization/depersonalization as a result of a Prozac dose increase. I have been on 10 mg of Prozac for about 4 months with moderate improvement to my mental health, but my GP recently increased my dose to 20 mg after describing an increase of feelings of guilt, fear of the future, and rumination. I have battled both anxiety and depression on and off for years and within the past year decided to actually do something about it. However, after having my Prozac increased to 20mg last Tuesday, everything has started to feel strange lately. I have experienced periods of being hyperaware of my thoughts and existence before to the point that it was moderately debilitating, but this experience currently is the worst that it has ever been. I feel trapped in my head and its very difficult for me to even do simple and normal things, as well as even think. Even as I type this I am struggling a lot more than I feel anyone should. Things that I used to do without a second thought now feel "abnormal" or "unreal" and require a lot of energy for me to do. No matter how hard I try to tell myself that this is an irrational feeling/mindset and try to just let the thoughts pass, I cannot. I have appointments scheduled this week to meet with both my therapist and my GP, but I wanted to share in case anyone can provide even a small glimmer of hope. Thanks in advance.

While you were going thru DPDR and anxiety. Did you ever ask yourself what if I’m in alternate reality. I’m super anxious now because I read it somewhere. Is this common?

i got it from smoking a weed pen which most people got it from smoking a joint or eating an edible

when i was in my trip i was trying my absolute hardest to remain calm but when i was high it felt like i was controlling everything and everyone and i knew it wasn’t normal so i thought if i tried to convince myself everything was fine then everything would be fine my heart was pounding and things were getting so loud

afterward i kept having weird thoughts for example i thought that people looked and moved like robots even my family their movements were so fast it was hard for to comprehend what had just happened and it would freak me out

i also had thoughts like i had escaped the matrix and i needed to drink water to return to normal cuz the water has something in it that keeps people in the matrix

thinking my life was a video game i remember around that time a new rick and morty season released and it had an episode about “roy” which is pretty much a life simulator and i felt like what if this is me

i felt like if things in media or movies were talking about psychosis or simulations or anything of that nature that it meant that i had psychosis or something like that

this all happened in 2022 so it’s hard for me to remember exactly what i was thinking at the time i never had any hallucinations or anything tho i do remember having a panic attack so bad i thought i was dead or dying and that i had been poisoned by mercury in the weed pen i smoked causing me to lose my mind and go insane..

i even went to the ER and met with a therapist who said that it wasn’t psychosis or schizophrenia but till this day i don’t know. i have stopped drinking and smoking since then im too scared to relive what happened and now im just left with all these questions and no idea how to move forward no one has commented on my last few posts probably because they are so long but i don’t know what to do i just want to figure out what’s wrong

i feel like i relate more to dpdr than schizophrenia but sometimes i feel like i relate to schizophrenia to i just don’t know what to think anymore.

So I’ve had dpdr since smoking weed since September 2023. I remember few days after I had hard time sleeping for a few days and it seems I’ve had a flair up or my slepe schedule is messed up because of it since having dpdr I’ve been scared to sleep, sounds stupid but unsure why. If I’ve had sleep I can kind of push it to one side.

So I have been having trouble adjusting my sleep schedule for a while now. I go from working lates at work finishing at ten pm and going to sleep anywhere from 4am to 7am and waking up about 2pm or about 3. I used to go to work then stay up until college day was done and go sleep when I went in now I end up sleeping about 4/5/6 and waking up just before 9. It makes me feel horrible throughout the day and I do this for two days as I’m only at college and I end up going to bed earlier then normal but still waking up at 2pm 3pm to catch up on missed sleep. When I don’t sleep much I have really bad anxiety and get frightened of sleeping it turned from being scared of not getting enough sleep to being scared of sleep itself. I don’t know what to do at this point and I’m at this situation again went to bed at 5am and woke up at 8:45. I’m scared to sleep and need to be up at same time again tommorow and it’s currently 9:45pm and I’m tired but scared to sleep. Any advice I know it sounds stupid but I suffer from anxiety and derealisation. I used to go to school and I would get about 6-7 hours per night. I think it’s. A messed up sleep schedule but u would think if I only slept three hours I would sleep when I get in but I don’t and can’t really unsure why. If I’m sleeping at 7am and waking up at 2/3pm I can sleep over 9 hours easy. And when I’m not recovering from lack of sleep I average about 8/9 hours which I guess is healthy but I don’t think doing this to my self every week can be healthy.

somatic body experience or emdr maybe?

Anyone else only feel emotions only in their body but not their head? If I startled I'll have the jump response and feeling in my stomach, but I don't feel it in my head.

It makes no sense to my mind. I live in such unreality and detachment from self - I can't even imagine what having that back would feel like, would it be like the reverse of going into DPDR? Each day I wake up and feel less myself, I'm assuming coming out of it would be the opposite, feeling a little more yourself each day. Going from unreality to reality with the flick of a switch would be so overwhelming.

It's just beyond my comprehension how it would feel, how I could even go back to a normal and familiar perception and experience of life. To those who have recovered, how did this feel? As someone who hasn't had emotions or connection to the world in nearly 3 years, it's unimaginable. I remember what the world used to feel like, and in this state - it would be completely overwhelming to go back. I'm assuming that's why DPDR stays, I'm so internally aroused and overwhelmed that the world seems scary and unsafe. When I think about the world and reality, that's how I feel- it's unsafe and unpredictable. Without this shield, could I handle it?

Back in December i smoked too much weed had a green out that lasted hours. I took 8 bit hits in a row without thinking. Ive noticed a big change and ive felt a lot better. I still dont feel real and my voice is so loud in my head and its starting to freak me out. I want this feeling to go away so bad. Everything feels like constant deja vu/reliving the same things. Last night i had a really bad panic attack where i was screaming and crying. In that moment i felt like i was going crazy, nothing felt real at all. I dont know what to do anymore.

Hi everyone,

I was in your shoes a year ago, but i made it out and i am here to help those who are stuck. You can message me, i will reply.

This is my new account cuz i lost my previous so i am not catfishing

Title: 25M – Recovering from Heavy THC Vape Use, Experiencing Cognitive & Emotional Issues – Is This PAWS? Need Advice

Post: Hey everyone,

I’m a 25-year-old who recently quit heavy THC vape use after a year of abuse, during which I went through 50 carts in total. Before that, I was completely clean and sober for six years (ages 19-24) and lived a super happy, sharp, and motivated life. During those six years, I went to the gym consistently for a year, probably got drunk only 6-8 times in total, and never abused any substances—life was good, and sober living felt natural. But after a year of THC abuse, I feel like my brain is barely functioning, and I’m struggling to feel like myself again.

Symptoms I’m Experiencing: • Cognitive Issues: • Feeling like my brain has 0 power • Struggling with fast thinking, talking, and fluent thoughts • Feeling mentally dulled and lacking clarity • Preoccupied with thoughts of brain damage • Difficulty emotionally connecting with people • Frontal lobe tingling and sensitivity—This started about two weeks into withdrawal and comes and goes. Sometimes it feels like a light tingling sensation, other times it’s a strange sensitivity or even mild pressure in the front of my head. It’s not painful, but it feels off, almost like my brain is “waking up” or adjusting to life without THC. • Emotional & Psychological Symptoms: • Emotional numbness and apathy toward my future and relationships • Feeling down, depressed, and disconnected • Constant looping thoughts about how I ruined my life. It’s like my brain is stuck in the past, replaying everything I should have done differently. My mind keeps thinking, “If I had done this or that, I would be okay.” These thoughts take over my entire day. • Anxiety, heart pounding, and racing thoughts when dozing off for a nap • Hallucinations when trying to nap (visual distortions, strange sensations, or dream-like imagery right before sleep) • Visual & Sensory Symptoms: • Visual snow started about two weeks into recovery—this wasn’t an issue while I was using, but suddenly appeared after quitting. It has lessened a bit, but it’s still noticeable. • Blurry vision that started around the same time as the visual snow. • I had visual snow at 19 when I quit substances and went through a bit of a breakdown, but I fully recovered after a year. • Sleep & Dreams: • I can fall asleep easily and sleep through the night, but as soon as I enter dreams, they feel weird. • I dream every single night—dreams feel hyper-realistic, vivid, and often intense. • I wake up feeling like my brain is still stuck processing the past, and as soon as I open my eyes, the regretful looping thoughts hit again. • Some nights, I have multiple dreams that I remember in detail, even hours after waking up. • A lot of these dreams involve random, sometimes unsettling themes, but they don’t always feel like nightmares—just overly detailed and immersive.

What I’m Doing to Recover: • Trying to go to the gym 3-4 times a week to get my body and mind back on track. • Using sauna and steam room, followed by cold plunges multiple times a week to help with circulation and mental clarity. • Taking supplements like Omega-3, Lion’s Mane, Vitamin D3, B3, and a multivitamin. • Drinking only water, no caffeine or alcohol. • Eating clean and focusing on hydration.

Is This PAWS?

I’ve read about Post-Acute Withdrawal Syndrome (PAWS), and I’m wondering if that’s what I’m dealing with. The looping regretful thoughts, brain fog, emotional numbness, and strange dreams feel like my brain is struggling to reset.

I’m about 2.5 months clean now, and while I feel about 5% better, I still feel trapped in this cycle of overthinking and regret. I feel like my life is ruined. I just want to get back to the sharp, driven, and happy person I was for six years straight.

Has anyone else experienced this? How long did it take to feel normal again? Any advice or reassurance would be really appreciated. Thanks.

(Sorry for mistakes, english isn't my first language)

I'm 15, i have been seeing psychologist for 1 or 2 months. Today i was able to open up about derealization i experience(it was my main concern. I was scared to share it) and effects of it on my mental health. She told me i should consult psychiatrist, next week she'll tell my mom about it. How many meetings can i expect? I really don't know what i should get preppered for (except the stressful talk with my mom about this whole situation, because i never opened up to anyone about my experience to ir.). If i get diagnosed with dpsr disorder. How long did it take for you to realize you're getting better? What kind of treament did you get?

If anyone reads this, thank you for listening. Any kind of answers would mean a lot and make me less anxious.

Please don't forget to check out the Official Subreddit Resource Guide.

Hi Folks,

"Does anyone else [experience this symptom]" is one of the most commonly asked questions on the sub, so this weekly sticky is to create a dedicated space for users to relate to each other and ask questions about questions they might have.

DPDR is, unfortunately, an under-researched disorder with many strange symptoms. As a result, its sufferers are often left between confused and experiencing a full-blown existential crisis. Symptoms may overlap and vary in intensity. "Keep in mind that two people might describe/interpret the same symptom (and its effect on their own functioning/cognition) very differently."

We just want to emphasize this thread, both questions and responses are completely subjective and not of a medical nature. If you haven't already, please try searching the sub (and "Symptom Question" flair) to see if your question has already been asked.

Hi guys, I had DR all my life until I went on hormon therapy two weeks ago. I am trans and the DR was a symptom of my biochemical dysphoria. I am very happy that its gone now and feeling like my life gained more value.

But I feel very overwhelmed with the "real world". I am not used to it at all as I was permanently dissoziative (except for maybe twice a year for a thew seconds). I get tired fast and when Im not I cant stop looking around and trying to take it all in (because I used to do so when I had the rare chance of seeing the world without the shadow/blurryness).

How did you cope with that?

I don’t even know if this is what I have, I’ve had various mental health problems throughout my life, i’m suspected to have some kind of dissociative disorder possibly DID by a specialist, had severe anxiety all my life and suspected OCD also. I started Prozac 20mg at the beginning of December and had a great month, then increased to 30mg at the beginning of January as I felt like I could use a little more, then on January 8th I took way too much of an edible and since then I can’t function at all.

I had a ridiculously bad trip and panic attack for hours, eventually I thought I was ok but it was like it never went away? Days turned into weeks and it’s now been nearly a month and I have been pretty much unable to function since then. Every time I leave the house I have an insane panic attack, I can’t think clearly, I can’t focus, I feel nothing but panic. I don’t remember who I am, I don’t recognise my life, I don’t care about anything I used to, I can’t daydream, I can’t imagine anything vividly in my mind, I can’t feel emotions, I feel like I’m half asleep 24/7, like the state where you’re about to fall asleep and you feel confused and weird and your thoughts make no sense, I’m like that 24/7, I feel like my thoughts aren’t mine, I’m just acting on autopilot and I have no inner thoughts, I can’t “feel” anything.

This is hard to explain but I can look at an object and the word will come into my head, but it doesn’t feel like I generated that thought. I can look at an apple and hear“apple” in my mind, but it’s like I don’t Feel it. I used to think in feelings and images only but now I have to talk to myself because I can’t visualise or feel anything.

I literally have as many panic attacks as is possible, it only stops when my body can’t physically panic anymore, then starts again immediately, I get maybe an hour or 2 a day of not being in a panic attack and the rest of the time I am, every time I try to do something I get so confused and dizzy and it feels surreal and dreamlike, even just typing this or using my phone is hard it’s like I forgot how to do anything, nothing feels natural and everything makes me panic, I can’t focus on anything. I have no sense of self or desire to do anything, I feel like everything I cared about before I can’t access it anymore.

I’m exhausted 24/7 I feel like I could fall asleep at any moment but when I do I wake up panicking again. I literally can’t function. Even watching TV or playing a game I can’t focus and get confused and it feels wrong and I have to just lie down and close my eyes again. I used to listen to music 24/7 now even that sounds weird and overwhelming and I don’t want to.

It’s getting worse as the weeks go on, not better, how do I fix this? Have I fucked my life up for good? I had chronic fatigue and brain fog before and it’s like it’s been amplified by a million and my personality and sense of self and emotions are gone too and my consciousness barely even exists anymore. I’m scared I’m gonna disappear entirely. I don’t feel real at all I wish I could even watch a show or something to distract myself but I can’t process any information. I forget what I’m saying halfway through a sentence and forget words and get so confused at basic stuff.

I had an MRI because I was 100% convinced this was neurological but it came back completely clear. Idk what to do I’m so scared I’d do anything to go back to normal I didn’t realise how good I had it until now I want to go back I’m grateful for my life now I will never complain again. I’m autistic also and I don’t have a job or school or anything I dropped out when I was 15 and have been struggling with my mental health since but I was planning to do online college which I had to drop out of and even sending the email to drop out of the course felt impossible my brain is withering away I can barely think at all. I had barely any life to begin with now I have even less but I would do anything to even go back to that. I don’t understand how I can feel this way but not have brain damage??

I’m coming off the Prozac to see if that helps me feel my emotions again or makes some of this go away or something but idk what else to try i’m so desperate I’ll do anything. I’m cutting out caffeine and nicotine to see if that helps and trying to exercise every day and stuff but I feel like this is permanent I’m terrified

I have so many debilitating existential fears like “I’m stuck in a dream” etc. When you fully recover do these seem ridiculous and you can live life completely happily and normally like before? And not think about this stuff the whole time and not panic or feel trapped in your existential fear or that it’s real etc? Please no negative comments 🙏

Does anybody else’s DR tend to kick in at the change of each season? I mean in a sensory way (not a seasonal affective disorder way). Here in the UK you can just about feel winter turning into spring. The overall lighting from the sun looks slightly different, new smells are in the air, the temperature is very slightly warmer etc

It’s hard to explain why it triggers my DR so much. It’s almost like it’s been winter for so long, that the small sense of spring that I’m getting is reminding me of past spring times….which in essence gives me an eerie de ja vu feeling. (It’s not de ja vu though).

I get used to one season, and then a new one comes along and the sensory changes trigger my DR. It sounds so stupid when I try and explain it, but I’ve always noticed this and today I thought I’d see if any other sufferers had the same experience.

Therapeutic and relieving benefits from barber beats and weed

I swear to God I've been on this journey for 10 years have been sober, have spent hours meditating, been on many pharmaceuticals, been in therapy, all of that combined is like pissing in an ocean compared to this experience. I've performed this specific ritual many times and only suggest to those that don't have dpdr because of weed but Everytime I do this it works. I gain a lot of insight and clarity and even at times can break through dissociation. My dpdr is because of my CPTSD and I just want that to be clear as well. So first off I am strain sensitive so I make sure I have the right weed (Hells OG by Elevate) that has been my 100% successor from many trial and errors but I believe the fact it's an indica is also important. I get in the bathroom pack my one hitter. I then get my music ready which is Barber beats. Really you can look on YouTube and find a barber beats playlist and hit shuffle should be fine. I have found my favorite artists though I really like "Darkness". I hit play. I start the shower and get it warm/hot. Then I take my hit. Then I get in the shower and just sit and let the weed the music and the shower go to work. It's a beautiful experience that is hard to put into words but it is so great. And then by the end of the shower I feel a little bit taller and can go about my day in a better headspace then I would have otherwise with everything that I gained from this experience. I know this sounds nutty but take it from someone that has tried 1000s of coping skills breathing techniques etc to no avail. I'm very curious what others experiences would be. Again I'm also saying if you're dpdr was put on by weed please stay away from this. Not suggesting putting anyone in a bad spot. Much love ✌️

I had so many other symptoms at the beginning of this and when they went away, I thought I was getting better / but I've gotten a 100x worse.

I remember I couldn't go out in the sun because of how fake everything felt, and I felt like I would melt. Everything looked like I was on acid. It felt like my body was disintegrating into thin air. When I looked out the window it was like everything I was looking at wasn't really there. I had visual floaters all day, severe agoraphobia, intrusive thoughts, severe depression, panic, memories felt like they weren't mine etc. all of that is gone - I can't even feel depressed or anxious. I'm mentally detached from everything; memories are all gone, emotions are all gone. They don't feel far away, they're just gone. I don't have the feelings of being in the sun, like I was melting - I just don't feel anything. My senses are completely gone, like I've been numbed completely. I don't understand why I got so much more dissociated despite all the therapy, living my life. Overcoming agoraphobia. Thought I was healing - now I wish I could go back. Each month I've felt less connection to myself and my past. The feelings are buried 100ft under now. I'm at a total loss of what to do - I can't live like this anymore. I don't feel "mornings" "weekends" "holidays" "time" "seasons" - I'm stuck in the same day over and over, no connection to anything at all. I don't even feel alive or like a person.

Is there a group were people can talk more personally about DPDR like a discord or something? I feel like talking to people with DPDR has helped comfort me and a way I can talk to more people struggling..

I don't know how I've been able to hold on this long - considering every day I get worse, I'm losing my ability to keep on. My life is completely devoid of anything- joy, sadness, anger, jealousy, love, anxiety even. I don't know why my mind thinks it's protecting me. It's ruining my life, it already has. I'm seriously not sure how to continue on with this - the first 6 months I had hope, and it's long gone.

I don't know why my mind thinks I can't handle feelings. I always had feelings and was extremely emotional. I'd give anything to go back to my normal anxiety - even though it wasn't fun, I had all my other emotions. Even with anxiety I had a full life that was vivid. Anxiety was 10% of my life and I managed it just fine. I don't understand how I go from that to this - I miss living, beyond words. I don't see how I could ever go back to a normal life full of feeling, considering I haven't felt any emotions in 2 years. I can't even remember what they feel like. I've never wanted to die - I was afraid of death, but I'm not even afraid of that anymore. Sometimes I wish I could just close my eyes and forget it all. I don't know what my mind is doing by worsening my dissociation every single day. I don't even remember what reality was like. It's like missing something you never even knew. My life wasn't perfect but I was happy - then this subconscious shit came out and ruined my entire life.

I legitimately don't think I can do this another year, another 5 years - considering I'm getting worse every single day, which I don't know how is even possible. I look at other people and can't understand how we are in the same existence, my life is reduced to nothing. I'm living a lie pretending I'm fine - but my friends have to know I'm not. I don't go out anymore. I don't travel. I don't do anything fun. I work and sleep. I don't get feelings of hunger. Sex. Love. Nothing. In the last week or so I've been feeling so out of body, like I'm not even attached to this body or reality. It's horrible. The dreams are getting worse - I have 0 relief. I wish someone could help me - I can't do this. I don't even believe my therapist can help me. A part of my fully believes I will be like this forever and has no hope. I can't even understand how to heal, it makes no sense to my mind. I just want to go back to my old life. I'd give everything. The level of suffering I'm at is beyond words. No one should feel like this - severe muscle pain, no energy, complete loss of self and all memories, can't feel anything inside body or on skin, no goosebumps, chills, I don't get cold or hot, I'm just a dead body. I want to cry every single day because of the agony I'm in mentally - but I can't even cry. I am 32 years old and can't date, can't travel which I used to love, can't enjoy the most simple pleasures in life. I've never felt more trapped in my life, I don't know how to solve this.

I can't comprehend the point of my mind doing this. Removing from my body and reality completely, making me want to d*e every single day. My trauma was bad, it wasn't this bad. People have been through much worse and don't end up like this. My whole existence is gone from my mind, like I never was here. I'm so beyond done. I can't do it, it's like I was never meant to be happy, to enjoy life, to have freedom. There are no words - I didn't even know a human could experience this. The last 3 years are like I've been in a coma. I can't even remember my old life, what I used to feel, who I was, what the world and life felt like. I feel like I'm being punished by life when I've already been punished so much. My inner child is in control and won't let go, that childhood I never had and was full of trauma- has me trapped. It's so unfair, I hate every single day of my life. The suffering is incomprehensible

Hello everyone I just wanted to list down my symtpms and see if anyone relates at all.

Brain fog Vision is like watching out a VR and dream like. Sometimes have visual snow Pressure in eyes Eye strain pain No sense of time Tension headaches Can’t recognize self in mirror Everything looks alien like. Getting lost at times and feel like nothing looks familiar. When it’s day outside it feels like the time doesn’t feel right. Have no connection Terrible memory loss Everyday feels like the first day of life Twitching Spasms The list can go on and on? Any other symtpms ?

When my dpdr started 3 months ago I was sleeping like a baby. It made me fatigued all the time. Then one month ago my insomnia started and I have not recovered since. I’ve tried to come off sleeping pills twice and my body won’t give into sleeping naturally. Like I might fall into a light sleep for an hour but nothing more. Assuming my cortisol and adrenaline is high having dpdr, how am I supposed to recover from insomnia? I’m putting in the therapeutic work but it just seems like I’m in a trap being stuck in dpdr survival mode. I can’t keep taking sleeping pills because they make my dpdr feel worse and my doctors will not keep prescribing them long term. Has anyone overcome severe insomnia having dpdr? Will my sleep drive eventually knock me out?

Hello so I’ve been experiencing derealization for about 4 years now I cant stand this anymore I feel like I cant even think or comprehend the most simplest things. I feel like some type of brain fog and it’s like I’m just there without even being able to understand what others are trying to say to me. I used to be so much smarter back then but now it’s just the complete opposite. Does anyone else relate to this?

Does anyone know if there is a difference between those that developed dpdr in their teens/adulthood or have periods of it versus someone who’s had it their whole life? I’ve had it since I could remember or very early childhood (it’s hard to tell), so I don’t really have a reference for what being “normal” would feel like. I was just wondering if that may mean it has a different cause?

I need to know if this is the same for other DPDR people- I can't wear sunglasses. Whenever I wear them I feel disconnected and stop understanding what is going on around me. I'm instantly hot and have trouble breathing, while feeling more and more disconnected. The same with closing eyes while being surrounded by others (that's actually how my first ever episode started). Do you ppl also have this? I've read some opinions online that it's actually the opposite and wearing sunglasses helps, so I'm just wondering :)

I wonder if someone with DPDR can be "trusted" with a delicate and high-stakes line of work, where one wrong move can have detrimental effects. Like doctor, pilot, astronaut, surgeon, professional athlete, etc.

While I believe DPDR won't hinder cognition or hand-eye coordination, I feel like it makes me feel too sluggish to make quick and reliable decisions, like in an emergency situation.

Also, I'd love to know what job everyone has and if DPDR makes it difficult or not.

Not sure how else to explain it. It scares the ever living shit out of me. I feel like I am hanging onto reality by a thread, physically light and weird, my head feels like it could just zap away. Of course it triggers a shit ton of existential thoughts and fears too. Is this even DPDR?

Any advice or support is appreciated 😔 I hope you’re all doing okay

15m struggling with weed induced dpdr and debilitating existential fears for the past 5 months. I was doing better for a week or two and then it got bad again. I’ve fallen back into a depression again. My parents think I’m just being lazy or “not helping myself” even thought it’s not that easy. Does it really get better? Especially the existential shit. It’s so tiring and each new existential thought hits me harder. I’m just tired at this point. I’ve been trying to get professional help and I’ve tried 2 therapists and they didn’t even know what dpdr is. Any advice?

i am so confused i don't know what im doing i dont even know what to say in this post. i have like brain fog or something and i literally cannot think straight and i kind of lost my ability to imagine a visualize. it's just i can't lose this im such a. visual learner and this is giving me so much anxiety i can't stop crying from it. i fucking hate weed i wish i never did it. the thing is i don't even feel the derealization or depersonalization. maybe like sometimes i feel like but it goes away so quick i don't even notice it. maybe some people would rather have this than dpdr but i promise you this is just equally as hard. it's so frustrating i feel like so stupid. and please i don't mean this in a rude way, but don't answer to this and tell me that you also have it and you've had it for like however long. sadly, that really doesn't help me. i need someone who actually did i understand that the people who have healed aren't really here anymore but please. i'm way to young for this. why is this still persisting. ( i had dpdr for about 2 months after that i got kinda felt brain fog, its just i cant really tell because i literally cannot process information at all)