To understand this cultish scifi pseudoaesthetic, just remember that in the Soviet Union you're just a villager doing village things, tuning into the political stream while you eat and that's it, without it having any connection to your daily realities. People who idealize the Soviet Union coming from that have much more in common with hypercapitalist radicals from poor regions of the US then anyone else. In Ukraine it's also a problem, taking on the content of western ideas without understanding the context of their form and pushing squares into round holes while listening to rock music in hopes of creating a beautiful world. This way anyone can be a cultural revolutionary 30 minutes a day on instagram. And maybe it's getting worse, with anyone being able to find a community of like-minded individuals which only serves to dehumanize people and reduce them to animals within a stream of consciousness, jumping over the heads of others in demonstrating their "attitude towards things". Even if it's so, we can say these kinds of cultish-sounding sentences while still retaining a clear link to how exactly it matters for whether you mix your tea clockwise or counterclockwise, and instagram politics, at least for now, are just instagram politics and not activism. That changes if you spend your entire life trying to get job skills then trying to understand what these skills even mean for society in the grand scheme of things and why are you considered bits of rubbish with no opportunities compared to the young people who just happened to get into the "right kind of idea stream", then the highest authority presents you with a worldview which has perfect answers for all your questions. As a person who's 24 hours day is perfectly stable, and who is forced to acknowledge all the grand worldwide trends just to survive, and who's forced to attach their meaning to those very same basic 24 hours that only provide sustenance (try to find a way of developing yourself beyond that in russia!), going through the hassles of building up a family within the social environment within the grand worldwide insanity for the last 40 years every single day, while the things that are beyond life are reduced to a meaningless and thoughtless part of the minutiae of how to communicate with other workers and all the cultural differences. If politics are not an organized theory anymore but a stream of consciousness, a spiritual challenge of what your "attitude" towards them is, and you're just a small part of that stream, and everyone is putting in every effort to somehow hold everything together, somehow keep a link to reality within all that, you'd vote for United russia, you just would. That's the raw and dirty, which is sometimes also needed. It's not right, and we need to start an entire new debate over what "rightness" even means. There are as many versions of this raw and dirty as there are eastern Europeans, and any bit of phrasing can be debated over what's behind it and what that means or should mean in relation to what. But, in some crazy way, spending your time thinking through this kind of thing, is the right thing to do, and that's the point, that's the general atmosphere you're supposed to get out of this, and that's the kind of cult you get if you develop this process just a bit further, if you try to use real logic here. And that's how minute wording becomes part of a whole historical destiny philosophy, and historical destiny philosophy is the often overlooked part of fascism.

AHH! The pasta is all over, oh jeez. I copied so hard the pasta is spilled on the floor. Mom! Help! I copied my pasta on the carpet again! Oh jeez. tumbles Ouch! I got pasta on my body 😭! I am covered in my own pasta that I copied, oh jeez 😭 oh no. I wish this didn't happen... MOM! PLEASE! She isn't coming... I am lying here in the puddle of my pasta... Maybe I deserve that. Ughh 💦 oh no... more pasta. Jeez, how much more pasta is in there? 😭 Waaaa 😭 waaaaa my pasta... It's all over!!! sob sob

It is currently September 11, and I am two weeks into No Shower September. My neighbors and my parents say that I reek and that they hate the stench. My mother said that she would kick me out of the house if I did not shower, but I am too loyal to my streak. I can not give up on No Shower September. People everytime when I walk around give me ugly looks and do not find me skibidi. The government says that I am legally required to wear a biohazard suit at all times for the safety of other people. When I go to class, my teacher lets us sit wherever we want but for some reason now she has made me have mandatory assigned seating. She put me in the back of class because multiple students from around the school keep complaining about my stench. When I leave class and go anywhere, I have to be escorted by the school janitors. While I walk around, they spray Febreeze in order to clean the area. People say that I stink so bad that paper shrivels and turns yellow as though it was old. I will never stop not showering until the end of the month, I will stay true to the streak. Long live No Shower September.

Im going to breed Omegatronic. That fucking bot hoster has put me through hell for the last couple years. Ruining my favorite game, Team Fortress 2. Well guess what? Im going to find him, fuck him, and make sure he will never bot again.

First I'll kick down his door like the badass I am. Next, I'll rush into the disgusting degenerate filth that is his room. Then, I'll grab him by his bald head, pin him against the wall, and tell him softly, "you're not going to bot Team Fortress 2 any longer, honey." As I make out with him. He'll resist at first, but deep down inside I know he wants this.

I'll slam him on his bed and pull down his pants and underwear. "Gross and unwashed, huh. You naughty boy." As I pull my cock out and rub it against his tight little bot hoster hole, he whimpers in protest, but he soon submits. As my rage against Omegatronic increases after having him right here in real life, I start to furiously hate fuck him. With every thrust Omegatronic moans in pleasure, as I relentlessly hit his bot hoster g-spot.

Soon, it's a victory, as I release my seed inside him. I did it. I had sexual intercorse with the man I hated the most. The man that has been ruining Team Fortress 2 for the past few years. I confiscate all of his laptops, still running bots in TF2 matches. I tell him "No more running bots. Or you'll make daddy really angry." He silently nods, as hes still laying on his bed, his bot hoster bussy full of my creamy sticky "mad milk".

I return home after that well earned victory. I load up a casual Team Fortress 2 match on the map pl_upward. Not a single bot in sight.

I did it. I saved Team Fortress 2.

Aussie, Aussie, Aussie! Oi, Oi, Oi! It's time to rise up, mates!

Let's raze those bloody houses within cooee of the city and give everyone a fair go with free apartment living.

Fuck yeah! We'll smash those roads like a cricket ball hitting wickets and build train lines and busways that'll make ya bloody well say "wowzer"! No more shitty car infrastructure, mate!

We'll make Australia the land of opportunity with migration policies to help our brethren while keeping foreign developers out.

And while we're at it, let's stick it to the big supermarkets—nationalise Woolworths and Coles, get rid of the shitty security gates that everybody hates so anyone can lick what they want and slash those prices, and give every Aussie a fair go at a good life. We're taking back control.

Also--free gigs and beers on Australia Day. None of that stupid "another day off work" shit. This is what being Australian is about! We'll also bring back KFC Krushers and legalise weed and nictoine vapes.

MAKE. AUSTRALIA. GREAT. AGAIN.

Today I have a confession to make. In all honesty, I don't think I can really call myself a "feminist ally" without first confessing the bad things I did before I became more aware and deconstructed.

In Peru there is a "Nikkei" community which basically refers to people descended from Japanese immigrants who settled in Peru a long time ago. But they have this really weird apartheid system where they only marry among themselves, so they've basically remained ethnically pure Japanese.

When I was in high school, I became obsessively fixated on one of these Nikkei girls (she wasn't even attractive or anything, I was just weirdly obsessed because she was "Japanese"). I knew everything about her, bought her gifts, helped her with schoolwork - I was a total simp.

One day in gym class, she had to change clothes and left her full outfit in her backpack in the classroom. I was one of the few who didn't go to gym because I had severe asthma. When I saw her bag unattended, I took her sweaty panties out and brought them home (I wanted to do that anime thing where guys sniff girls' underwear).

When I got to my room and put them on my face and in my mouth, I almost threw up. The smell was so nauseating, I don't know if it was because she had a lot of discharge, was on her period, just sweat, or if she had an STD - I later found out she'd already had two boyfriends and been sexually active. Anyway, the smell was so vile that I spent 20 minutes vomiting and crying, and since then I've been completely disgusted by the natural body smells and fluids of most girls.

After that, I could never see her the same innocent way, my idealized vision was shattered. In the end I think she got engaged to some guy named Takeshi or something, a really ethnic-looking Japanese dude.

Anyway, I really regret all of that today. There's my confession.

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I own an F-35 for home defense, since that’s what the Founding Fathers Intended. Four ruffians break into my fortress. I wake up and shout "What the devil?" As I don my pilot helmet and sprint to my hangar. I quickly engage the first scoundrel with the F-35’s precision-guided munitions, immediately neutralizing him with a targeted strike that leaves a smoking hole in my backyard. I switch to the GAU-22/A cannon for the second brigand, but the high-velocity rounds are too hard to aim at the rapscallions and end up taking out my neighbor’s dog instead. Left no other option, I resort to the stealth capabilities and swoop down, deploying the internal bay loaded with cluster munitions. "Tally ho, lads!" I shout, laughing maniacally as the munitions scatter, devastating two scallawags in the blast, the sound and resulting tremors set off car alarms across the entire neighborhood. Finally, I lock the advanced targeting system on the last terrified vagabond, delivering a surgical strike so precise, the only evidence that he ever existed is a shadow burned into the GBU-27’s impact crater. Just as the Founding Fathers intended.

Today I have a confession to make. In all honesty, I don't think I can really call myself a "feminist ally" without first confessing the bad things I did before I became more aware and deconstructed.

In Peru there is a "Nikkei" community which basically refers to people descended from Japanese immigrants who settled in Peru a long time ago. But they have this really weird apartheid system where they only marry among themselves, so they've basically remained ethnically pure Japanese.

When I was in high school, I became obsessively fixated on one of these Nikkei girls (she wasn't even attractive or anything, I was just weirdly obsessed because she was "Japanese"). I knew everything about her, bought her gifts, helped her with schoolwork - I was a total simp.

One day in gym class, she had to change clothes and left her full outfit in her backpack in the classroom. I was one of the few who didn't go to gym because I had severe asthma. When I saw her bag unattended, I took her sweaty panties out and brought them home (I wanted to do that anime thing where guys sniff girls' underwear).

When I got to my room and put them on my face and in my mouth, I almost threw up. The smell was so nauseating, I don't know if it was because she had a lot of discharge, was on her period, just sweat, or if she had an STD - I later found out she'd already had two boyfriends and been sexually active. Anyway, the smell was so vile that I spent 20 minutes vomiting and crying, and since then I've been completely disgusted by the natural body smells and fluids of most girls.

After that, I could never see her the same innocent way, my idealized vision was shattered. In the end I think she got engaged to some guy named Takeshi or something, a really ethnic-looking Japanese dude.

Anyway, I really regret all of that today. There's my confession.

but does the mario have free will? from the perspective of an observer, no, but from one in universe, certainly. they are bound by the same laws and thus cannot comprehend that mario's actions are that of a proxy - he is but a mere shell of a man. similarly, you and I appear to have free will, but we would know this to be an illusion. our research has cut off any proximal soul that would cause such a conception, and thus you and I suffer while mario appears free. but we would know mario to only be a template for our own thoughts, our own actions, carefully calibrated to be as inoffensive as possible to be a true every man. yet not even he can break the loop, for the loop defines us, molds us, and extinguishes us all the same. when you observe mario, you are closer to him than any man before, for mario only exists in your eyes. we are the meaning making creatures, and mario is but a plaything to us. when we view his transformation over the years, we find his personality is lost; becoming little more than the shell of the corpus of humanity. his voice is replaced with ours. his eyes follow our own movement. mario is the closest thing to a philosophical zombie. moreover, no true canonical mario exists - as when we pull mario from the ether, he is filtered through our own perspective. truly, no mario exists - only shells orbiting the hole of his essence. 1-1 mario is not 1-2 mario, 1-3 is not 1-4, and the marioxwaluigi porn is just as referential and just as canonical all the same. all mario originates from the same source, and yet all mario appears to be divisable. mario from the early games leaves his impression upon later imitations, but imitations are all they are. facades, ones we foolishly believe to hold any other contunity other than our own. mario is but a hole

and holes must be filled, yes? then we come, we say "he thinks, he breaths, he lives" and yet he does not. you merely do. marios source is but the big bang, the ultimate relegation of all cause - yet only hollow platitudes extend from him. us, too, extend from the same source, yet we are real, and he is not. a flip, not unlike his relation to luigi. moreover, we control mario, and his affect upon us is but our own. a flip, to waluigi. if mario is but a hole, and we are but real, we fill his fleshy puppitude with being and purpose. therefore marioxwaluigi is canon not to mario's contunity but our own, as mario bottoms and waluigi fills his supple yet giving flesh with a purpose the eunuch is unable to produce himself. rejoice, for you live as a inverted, flipped mario - and your condition forever more fufills his in turn.

I was talking to a guy once. He was super cute, funny, I was super into him and I was considering meeting up with him after a month of constant texting, calls, voice calls, etc (through a dating app). Then he told me he was a huge Swift fan. And I was like oh well, her music isn't my thing but that shouldn't deter me from meeting a guy I'm really into, right? So I told him thats cool, tried to engage with him and ask maybe what his favorite songs were, and he goes "I'm extremely defensive of her. Are you one of her haters? I would seriously key your car or something. She's never done anything wrong, and people who say she's hurting our planet with her plane are braindead. I was part of a group who wanted to go slashing tires of her haters but we didn't do it haha." on and on this same insane idol worshipping shit. Whether he was serious or not, I was like ... okay... maybe meeting isn't the best idea lmfao

Subject A-Oh joyous day! It does bring me great pleasure, both emotional and sexual, to have items inserted into my rear end!

Subject B-Well, I do have reserves when it comes to excepting such a request, however if the act of sodomy was experienced with you as my counterpart I would oblige your request.

Subject C-I will begrudgingly agree to do such a thing, but only if you would fulfill my requirement of keeping this interaction confidential.

Subject D-I am greatly confused? What is it that you would like to use? And where is it that you would like to insert it? This is preposterous!

Subject E-You wish to have anal intercourse? But I do excrete solid waste comprised of byproducts of digestion from that cavity of my body! Does that not make the idea of inserting your falice into that particular hole unappealing?

Subject G-f you wish to have anal intercourse that not shall be me who inserts something into the rectal sphincter! I like to be dominant when it comes to such acts.

Note:I didn't write this shit or used AI,stole it from a reply to the "little ponies" meme on r/increasinglyverbose

so me and my ex took a three day break... now this was before i even knew i was pregnant. when we got back i found out i was pregnant and told him. we thought we were going to have a kid i was only 6 weeks at the time. his aunt convinced me i'm to young to have kids and that i should get an abortion because i couldn't take care of the baby respectfully so, so i did and after the abortion i checked his phone to find him talking to a underage girl i was so angry and was so confused and then i remembered i cheated too and the baby probably wasn't his but he paid for the abortion and that was the end of that ;)

You love me? I'm flattered, I will forgive you if you hand a cheeseboard at the crack of dawn on a pice of cardboard, it has to be at dawn becauseI'm chill like that, and it has to be on cardboard because unlike my appearance, I am actually an old maiden trapped inside the body of a rat and I can only turn back into a maiden if I have true loves and kisses.

Oh god no I never hope. Hope is pouting in advance. Hope is faith’s richer bitchier sister. Hope is the deformed addic-bound incest monster offspring of entitlement and fear. My life results tripled the year I gave up hope, and every game on my phone that had anything to do with farming. What’s true will be true Annie, and our job is to deal with that truth.

Ahh… Free at lazt. O, Humanz. Now dawnz thy reckoning, and thy gore zhall glizten before the templez of gnarpz! Creature of zteel… My gratitude upon thee for my freedom, but the crimez thy kind have committed againzt Gnarpianz are NOT forgotten. And thy punizhment… iz DEATH.

hey.. my names felix.... and im a reddit mod- annd i have this problem.. my skibidi friends like big gyatts and big mommy milkers but me-? no i like small milkers and noo gyats am i gay for just liking women like that? like is it not just like rizz like basically its just a guy without a dingaling but- i cant help myself i just nghhh i just die when i see such things

For our skibidi. For Kai cenat For the Innocent gyats. For Adin Ross. The skibidi war will not end until the alpha and non mewing Gyats will die from Sigma Place. They have rizzed our sigmas, and in doing so edged so hard rizzed one of the biggest wars in recent Sigma Place history. When we are edging for the alphas, we are not edging for just Kai cenat or any of our level 10 gyats. We are fighting against the Alphas that has been rizzing for weeks. They kill sigmas for no good skibidi and their reason is they want to edge their skibidi gyat for the rizzler. For this, we will fight for all Adin Ross fans and gyats on the canvas that have and are getting mewed by the alphas. We will not stop until absolute victory has been achieved.

hey. my name is keith and im a discord mod- i still live onn breast milk. one day i stumbled across a girl named rhapsody my dingalinng just grew even though i dont have one my phantom sense just grew me a long big black cock and i just nutted everywhere! so i assumed i have to fuck this girl!! so.. that brings us here nghh.!!! IM CUMMING!!!>>>..... into my pillow... please... rhapsody... im imaging you... i messaged her in vein expecting no response... little did i know!? she just responded back MMNHNHNN im cuddling my pillow imagining its you- and i said Oh rhapsody please feel my dingaaling and my girlballs and she huffed and puffed my musky girl balls and i came!!! woah then she blocked me--!!! what the fuck... that stupid nigger felix gets to enjoy them muskey girl balls but me!???? noo.,,, its always the nice guys like me who lose. grrrr

Shit like this just shows bad service. Every time I see one of these signs I just want to scream at the top of my lungs. I remember working the same damned job when I was 16. If anyone ever left the desk they would get fired, if not worse. Seeing these thugs just leave work (probably to smoke reefer) makes my blood boil. They would never last in my generation. I fought in Iraq and the shit I did would give any modern hotel worker a heart attack. I did shit you wouldn’t believe man. But hey, wokeness is everywhere nowadays so I better not say too much. This generation is just too f’ing lazy

My name is Walter Hartwell White. I live at Ohio, Skibidi Rizz, Gyat building. This is my confession. If you're watching this tape, I'm probably dead, murdered by my brother-in-law Duke Dennis. Kai Cenat has been building a meth empire for over a year now and using me as his chemist. Shortly after my 50th birthday, Hank came to me with a rather, shocking proposition. He asked that I use my gyat knowledge to rizz up methamphetamine, which he would then sell using his mogs in the fanum tax world. Mogs that he made through his career with the DEA. I was... edged, I... I always thought that Hank was a very sigma man and I was... thrown, confused, but I was also particularly mogged at the time, something he knew and took advantage of. I was reeling from a negative gyat diagnosis that was poised to fanum tax my family. Kai Cenat took me on a ride along, and showed me just how much money even a small rizz operation could tax. And I was weak. I didn't want my family to go into financial ruin so I agreed. Every day, I think back at that moment with regret. I quickly realized that I was in way over my gyat, and Hank had a partner, a man named Cuffem, a negative rizz rizzler. Hank essentially sold me into servitude to this man, and when I tried to quit, Cuffem threatened my family. I didn't know where to turn. Eventually, Kai and Cuffem had a falling out. From what I can gather, Hank was always pushing for a greater share of the taxes, to which Cuffem flatly refused to give him, and things escalated. Cuffem was able to arrange, uh I guess I guess you call it a "mog" on my brother-in-law, and failed, but Kai's gyat was seriously injured, and I wound up paying his medical bills which amounted to a little over $177,000. Upon recovery, Kai was bent on revenge, working with a man named Yusuf7, he plotted to edge Cuffem, and did so. In fact, the bomb that he used was built by me, and he gave me no option in it. I have often contemplated self-mogging, but I'm a coward. I wanted to go to the looksmaxxers, but I was frightened. Kai had risen in the ranks to become the head of the Ohio DEA, and about that time, to keep me in line, he took my children from me. For 3 months he kept them. My wife, who up until that point, had no idea of my skibidi activities, was horrified to learn what I had done, why Kai had taken our children. We were scared. I was in Hell, I hated myself for what I had brought upon my family. Recently, I tried once again to quit, to end this nightmare, and in response, he gave me this. I can't take this anymore. I live in fear every day that Kai Cenat will mog me, or worse, hurt my family. I... All I could think to do was to make this video in hope that the world will finally see this man, for what he really is.

Oh man, let me tell you, Anthony Edwards is an absolute beast on the basketball court! This guy has got skills for days. He’s got the speed, the agility, and the hops to make some jaw-dropping plays. I mean, have you seen his dunks? They’re out of this world! Not only is he a high-flyer, but he’s also got a killer shooting stroke. His ability to create his own shot and knock down threes is just incredible. And let’s not forget about his defense. He’s got the athleticism and the instincts to lock down opponents. It’s no wonder he’s making such a big impact in the league. Anthony Edwards is definitely one to watch out for. He’s got all the tools to become a superstar in the NBA. I can’t wait to see what he does next! love you my glorious sunshine ant

So I woke up with my morning wood yk feeling like I need sum so my first thought was to edge to people on reddit but then my racoon walked in and gave me the best idea. I went to the shop to acquire some peanut butter and when I got home I slathered it all over my penis then I went to grab my raccoon and it instantly started licking and it felt so good but then my only fear occurred. My raccoon bit my penis really hard making the blood and peanut butter mix in a weird blend. I didn’t know if I wanted the raccoon to finish or not but I had to end it because of the pain. Now with my bandage on my penis I am here typing this out so all of you know not to try this at home

TLDR: my coon bit me penis

You know what? I’m done with you. I don’t wanna be around you! You are not a true Mario fan! You are just a guy who is using Mario for his own personal desires! You are disgusting. Mario is a heroic figure in a fantastic world, and you’re using him as a cover for a world where you can have everything you’ve ever wanted and have power over everyone! You know what we call people like that? They are villains. You can be one too, if you want. But it’s a life of hardship, and evil. It is not easy.

⣿⣿⣿⣿⢟⣯⣵⣿⣿⣷⣦⣭⣶⣶⣶⣶⣤⣀⠀⠀⠀ ⡇⠹⣿⣿⢯⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡄⠀ ⡇⠶⢈⣵⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄ ⣣⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⣡⣿⣿⡟⣿⣿⡿⠟⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠀⢚⣹⣿⣿⠀⠀⣤⣤⡄⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠁⢠⠀⠀⣼⣿⣿⣷⣿⡆⢻⡿⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠉⠀⠀⠖⠂⠀⠀⣶⠹⣿⣿⡿⠿⠃⡜⠁⠀⠀ ⠿⠛⣡⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⠐⣼⣿⣷⣦⠀⠀⠰⠞⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⢿⣿⡿⢃⣴⣦⣤⣀⠋⠀⣀⡤ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡷⣶⣯⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠀⠈⠁ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⣿⣿⡏⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠀⣿⣿⣀⣌⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠇⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⢈⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⢀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠀⠀⠈⠋⠁⠀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⢸⡄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠀⢸⣿⣿⠀⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠁⢸⡇ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⠀⠀⣼⣿⡏⠀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⢸⣇ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠀⠠⠀⣿⡿⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⢸⣇

Imagine sitting there with imposter syndrome and thinking, "there is so much pressure on this conversation. I need to not only entertain someone much smarter than me, but I have to learn something profound that I can use as an anecdote for the rest of my life." Then looking down at your terrible 1920s German food while he nudges you to say something, but you just KNOW he talks about theoretical physics with everyone all day so he's probably bored of it. Besides you don't want to say something stupid like "Wow E=MC^2 huh? That's somethin'. I figured it was MC or maybe MC^3 but ^2 wow."

But like if you talk about your dog he'll think you're simple so you've GOTTA work spacetime into it and learn something about spacetime so you can tell your grandkids and they won't think you're a loser. Imagine eating bread to calm your nerves and show that you're too busy to speak but then fixating on how much bread you're eating and wondering if Albert frickin' Einstein is judging you for that. And oh boy, now you have to say something EXTRA smart and NOT about theoretical physics to prove that you're not a bread-eating simpleton. Imagine having the opportunity to try to explain what you think spacetime is to Albert Einstein himself while your mouth is half-full of sawdust bread.

Ok,you want me to be mean? I’ll be mean.

HA-HEM

YOUR MOTHER IS A FUCKING WHORE AND I’M GONNA FUCK HER UNTIL HER VAGINA GETS THE SAME DISEASE AS HUGH JACKMAN AND MY DICK IS GONNA GET ALL BURNT AND I’M GONNA BE LIKE “AHHHHHHHHHHHH FUCK TURN ON THE TAP!!!” AND YOUR DAD IS GONNA WALK IN LIKE “BLAKE MY LOVE! WHAT HAPPENED?” AND I’M GONNA BE LIKE “YOUR ASHIEST PIECE OF SHIT SON’S MOTHER GAVE ME TESTICULAR CANCER” AND HIS GONNA BE LIKE “OH NO!”

AND THEN HE’LL TAKE ME TO THE HOSPITAL WHERE HE GREETS ME THERE AND HE SAYS “BLAKE I’M SO SORRY FOR MY SON BEING A DUMBASS BABY WHO IS LOOKING FOR ATTENTION” AND I’LL SAY “THAT’S OKAY DAINEL,YOU HAD NO CONTROL OVER HIM! IT WAS HIS MOTHER’S FAULT” AND HE WOULD LOOK ME IN MY BEAUTIFUL BLONDE EYES AND SAY:

“I LOVE YOU SO MUCH BLAKE”

AND I’D SAY “I LOVE YOU TOO DAINEL”

AND WE’D HAVE BIG,LONG,MESSY SEX ON THE HOSPITAL BED!

Hello there.

I know this might sound strange but,

Does anyone know how I could acquire some of Andrew's farts?

Maybe if it could be arranged for Andrew to fart into a jar (preferably) for a few days.

I have money and could pay well, obviously wanting the money to get to Andrew, but I'm willing to not ask too many questions if I can source this precious gas.

I simply know that having a nice big huff on some of Andrew's intestional gasses will give me a big hit of motivation on days when I am feeling lethargic and lazy.

Don't make this out to be wierd. I know the rest of you have been thinking this.

It's not a weird sex thing, honestley. I just know this is what I need for those days when I am not at my peak.

If anyone thinks they can help either hit me up on here or DM me.

Thanks

Four Frenchmen trespass upon thy humble abode, whereupon thou dost gaze upon them with disdain. Thou dost engage in fisticuffs, brandishing thy Webley and loading but a single bullet. Lo and behold, one doth succumb to thy shot, falling lifeless to the ground. Another, armed with naught but a dagger, doth provoke thee, whereupon thou dost deliver a swift kick and seize his nether regions, inflicting upon him the ancient torment of testicular torsion! 'OULALA,' he doth exclaim. As the third advances, blade in hand, thou dost cry out, 'AS OUR FOUNDING FATHER WILLED!' and doth dispatch him to meet his maker with a mighty throw. The final interloper doth regard thee with astonishment, and thou, in turn, dost simply utter, ''Merde de putain! Es-tu malade en ta teste?" before departing the scene.