/r/circlejerknyc
New York Metropolitan Area's Best Circlejerk!
/r/circlejerknyc
I [27/M/SoHo/Biglaw senior associate/Equinox member] have been dating this girl [18/F] for a few weeks now. I met her while I was swiping on Hinge+ while waiting for my Uber Deluxe to come pick me up for work (i hate the subway).
Long story short, we hit it off after I super liked her and we ended up meeting for drinks and dinner at Atomix. I took her back to my place (in SoHo) and we went upstairs. The doorman even looked surprisingly impressed with how beautiful my date was as we made our way up to my 3 bed/3bath condo (with roof access). She pretty much checked all boxes and we really seemed to hit it off.
Last night though I was devastated when she invited me over to her place. At first I was happy that she was comfortable enough to invite me over, so I texted her back that I'd love to come hang out at her place and put my iPhone 16 Pro down above the fireplace in my living room and went to my closet to pick one of my Burberry jackets that would keep me warm enough between going downstairs and waiting outside for my Uber Delxue.
After finding the perfect Burberry coat that matched one of my new Rolexes, I picked my iPhone back up and, to my utter shock, my (now ex) FWB texted me her Hoboken address and told me she couldn't wait to see me. My stomach immediately dropped as I'm sure you can imagine so I blocked her. AITA?
There’s conference that I have to go to in Newark. Of all places. Don’t feel like taking the train in the cold. And driving through a tunnel is out of the question. Any flights that I can take?
We just returned from Chinatown, and my wife put her hand on one of the aquariums with the live fish. She was not careful and touched a jellyfish. We got kicked out of the restaurant. We have yet to reach our insurance deductible and want to avoid ER visits. ChatGPT is telling us that fresh pee can remove the pain. Could anyone pee on my wife so she gets relieved?
We are looking for women preferably, but men can do it. Please send us a picture of you in DM.
PS: I am unable to do it because I am pee-shy
Foin. Not fine. I want a REAL NYC SantaCon this year.
And every year.
As title
we got a hookup from this peruvian kid who says his grandma cops from the santo daime tribes to deliver pure ayahuasca juice to my 3300sq ft loft converted from a foreclosed nunery. I have the robes, wind instruments, baby whipes and buckets but going to need a hand with tangibles and logistics, maybe someone with caretaker experience + a finance background if possible.