Hey guys! Here is the spot to post your, "Looking for a bro" post. Feel free to introduce yourself, age, where you're from, and what. you're looking for in a bro. This will be the only place to post your personal, r4r, or Looking for a bro posts going forward.

After MANY requests we are no longer doing the chat style posts for this thread so just post a comment below. If you have any other suggestions let a mod know. Thanks!

***REMEMBER, KEEP IT SFW OR IT WILL BE DELETED***

How do you guys deal with the possibility of your friend/bro getting bored with you, taking longer to respond to things, starting to feel one sided? Am I being paranoid if I bring it up to him? Or if I get jealous that he makes other friends? We’re really close and maybe that’s gotten boring for him?

Here is some context:

I'm 31M and also gay (all my friends are aware and are comfortable of who I am. I'm more of masculine type gay, not sure if this plays a part but it does for me internally).

My best friend is 23M and he is straight. I known him for 5 years via a sports program and mutual friends. He and I got along well quickly since we share many common value and interests. He also was studying in the same field I was (which at that time I was already working) so naturally I offered my help if he needed any.

The reason why I mentioned I am gay to my friends is because I value my friendship a lot. I grew up feeling that male friends may see / treat me differently once I come out to them. I did the same for this best friend very early in our friendship to get things out in the open. He was one of the very first male friend who showed nothing but acceptance and fully embrace into our bromance like hugging and just typical platonic bromance.

Recently he graduated and got a job and a new gf.. and things are starting to shift. We used to text everyday on random stuff and now he won't reply my messages at all. We no longer do the same sports since life got busy. When we finally meet up as a group of friend, I can feel him guarding when we do our usual brotherly hug. He and I have a few talks and he has been feeling super distance to me and distance to our mutual group of friends.

I want to know if anyone out there experienced this before? We had a couple of talk about it and I told him that I am always there for him. But being the older one in the friendship, I feel like I'm exhausted waiting for him to be honest with me (all my other friends agreed to be honest with each other) but I also don't want to lose him.

I told myself to trust our friendship and I still do, but sometimes I feel like I am the only one fighting for this.

I know this is easier for me to contemplate since I'm aromantic and have no interest in having an SO, but would you consider living with other bros if you had the opportunity? And I'm not talking about just being college roommates or anything like that, but rather purposely choosing to live together as a lifestyle?

I know living with other people isn't all roses, but Idk... I'd love to get together with a few other guys, find a good place that's not too small for us, and make it our own, you know? Of course, that wouldn't be with any random guys, but with bros who also have this mindset of brotherhood/bromance. That's the point after all.

I've been really thinking about this lately and considering it for the future, but Idk if I'd find the right guys for it. I've reached out to two of my friends about this, but they have their reasons not to do it.

Is this idea too silly? Could it work? Has anyone here done it?

I just think it'd be awesome to have your bros around you most of the time and look after each other like a "family". It'd also be a great chance to bond and just be dudes together as the default. Movie nights, gaming nights, BBQs, maybe having our own home gym... The holidays would probably be awesome as well. Maybe I'm just romanticizing it, but it honestly sounds amazing.

Background : Me and the Homie texting texting texting all day about 9:30pM … he tell me he about to chill with his GF… ( he just got out of prison 8 months ago)

I text back “ I love you bro , shhh 🤫, don’t tell Ashley “

🤦‍♂️ 2 days ago… haven’t text since

I guess I made a mistake when I believed and still waited for you Jrdan Cz, I trusted when you said you will be back. I made a mistake when I cared for our bromance for more than anything and loved you to make a fool out of myself. I was being an idiot when I used to re-read our chats and when take a look at your beautiful photo that puts a smile on my face. I am fool to believe that I will have a bro there who's there to support me no matter what. I even made plans to come over to Brisbane. I practiced skateboarding so that when we meet I wouldn't slow you down. Sometimes running away hurts more than speaking out truths. I was crazy to think that even when you said you were gonna take a break, that you would be back when I needed you. And when yesterday I was in the verge of broke down and I was opening up in your dms, I didn't know you were gonna block me. She made me doubt getting into relationships and now you broke my trust in friendships. Adios cause we are never gonna meet And I can't fight or try anymore for you Adios brother. I hope you are happy wherever or whoever u are with.

This survey explores whether having a male sibling affects one’s desire for close, platonic male friendships (bromance).

Share your thoughts and help us understand this intriguing dynamic!

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Who grew up showering with their buddies? It was normal in my house. We’d jump in the shower on sleep overs or after the pool. A lot of time we wouldn’t get dressed until we had to leave the house the next day. Being nude wasn’t an uncommon thing for me growing up and my friends all enjoyed coming over knowing it was the norm. Just fun hearing from other guys who were close enough with their buddies to do things like this .

I'm 22 and I have been close online friends with another man for nearly a decade (he's 20). He calls me his best friend but lately I've been wondering about how I feel about him. I never really put words on it myself, it was just "him".
Our lives suck, there's no way to really embellish that fact. We would like to see each other and then move in together in the future. Even though we're still figuring it out and not considering it as a given, it's a dream that helps us move forward.

To be clear though, I have a support system that isn't limited to him and made of real life and online friends, as well as my sibling and even therapy / counceling. Living on my own has been a life goal of mine for a long time, it's just that I recently realized that I would like him to be part of it, if we're compatible.

I thougt this sub might help since it highlights the ambiguity of bromance without neglecting the platonic aspect. I also thougt about this angle since he used the word "bromance" recently when talking about the people who often ask us if we are dating, and according to him "don't understand what a bromance is like".

I'm not sure how I feel about him especially because we both come from very fucked up backgrounds and we're still trying to reach safety at the moment. I am gay but also on the aromantic spectrum, and I am still dealing with a ton of emotional repression in order to survive. He is also aromantic and attracted to men, and dealing with his own issues due to survival mechanisms.
For brief clarification, some aromantics can experience romantic love, but very rarely and often under specific conditions.

I don't think it's as simple as having a "crush" or "wanting to date him". I've realized in the past months that I would like to be intimate with him if we have that possibility in the future. I just like the idea of being around him, and not having to pretend that I'm someone else, like I currently am in my abusive household. It feels so natural to be with him that it's hard to put words on it - it's just easy. He understands me, I understand him, we support each other.

I know about queerplatonic relationships but something about it bugs me and I'm not sure what. Maybe it's the word "platonic". I know it's not literal, but it feels restrictive. I think I'm struggling with the binary that most people draw between "friends" and "lovers". When I think about that, I always get this feeling that what I feel for him is different, and broader than these categories.

That's why I'm not afraid of him knowing inherently, since I do love him as a friend amongst everything else. I also trust him to understand me and figure things out together if he really sees us as friends exclusively.

I am still afraid to tell him though, because I'm not sure of what I'm feeling. I really care about him and I don't want to rush things or cross a line. It might also be insecurity due to the poor treatment I've received in the past, but I'm really afraid of ruining everything with the way I feel, and losing our bond.

I'd like help making sense of it, even though this is probably going to be a long term process for me. I don't expect to find clear cut answers here, but I thougt it might help me understand a little better.

I've always thought a bromance is more than just a close male friendship. It's a bond where boundaries dissolve, and you feel completely comfortable being your authentic self. No judgment, no pretense, just pure acceptance. As a straight guy, I've found that having a bro like this has been invaluable. It's that one guy you can call at 3 AM, crying over a breakup or celebrating a promotion, and know he'll be there, no questions asked. That's the kind of bond that truly enriches a man's life.

Back then I have problem with finding a job and I didn't feel like I want to talk with anyone, so I never read and never respond his massage. it's lingering me for a month now as I don't have courage to response him. I just want to say "I'm sorry bro". is it good enough ? what should I do ?

Been thinking about this a bit recently, especially since going to the gym cab be a way of giving ourselves opportunities for connection. Yet, depending on what it takes to go to the gym, it can be easy to put off the trip when it becomes inconvenient.

So, figured I'd put this out there to see which most guys here would lean towards.

View Poll

As my sexuality has evolved, I have found it incredibly hard to form deeper connections with other men. Women seem to so much better at this, in general. I have been thinking a lot lately about why this might be the case and came up with the below reasons why men who might seek these deeper connections with other men may fail. Id love to hear others' thoughts!

Offending a buddy - talking about anything deeper or more emotional, anything outside of "safe topics," runs the risk of offending a buddy who is a good friend but not intetested in that level of connection. This is my biggest barrier. Lack of emotional tools - even if a buddy wants to go deeper with a friemdship, many ot us lack the tools to go there because men (in many societies) are taught to be stoic and unconnected. Fear of Judgement - even if the interest and tools are there, a bromance runs the risk of being judged in multiple ways, which may be a barrier to something deeper. Lack of rolemodels - bromances can look so many different ways (I imagine), but I am aware of so few examples of this in popular culture. This may be limiting in some way. Do these barriers to a solid bromance resonate? Are there others you have encountered?

I’ll be hanging out with my best bud this weekend but it’ll be rainy. We’ll be staying in, catching up and maybe watching some flicks and having some drinks (or 5 hah).

We’ve got a pair of dice and a deck of cards and we usually just play 21 or I Declare War when hanging out. What are some other drinking games we can play? Nothing’s off limits!

Hi guys, I want some movies recommendations from you about bromance. I'm watching Scrubs Series and the friendship between Turk and J.D is so pure. I feel like I'm a bromantic guy but I still haven't find it yet. And yet It's hard to find it. I feel like I need a cuddle " a strong one" like Turk and J.D did, some closeness. I don't feel that there is a bromance in my country. ( which is a North African country) People think bromance = Gay. But No! They're brainwashed. 🤷‍♂️ I feel like I'm alone, but I'm used to it. Yet needing a bromance so hard 💔

Hey bros,

I've always been an affectionate guy. I deeply care about my friends, love spending quality time with them, and hugs are my absolute favorite way to say hi. Just to be clear, I’ve always seen this as completely platonic and have never been into full nudity or anything like that.

Recently, I decided to comment on the monthly post to connect with some bros nearby. To my surprise, I received several requests asking for things that were totally inappropriate. I’m confused and starting to wonder: Am I missing something? Isn’t bromance supposed to be purely platonic?

Would really appreciate some genuine insight!

I’m curious to know if other bros on here actively look for chances to make bros in real life or do you only look for a bromance online.

I look for them in real life, mostly with coworkers. I seem to have establish bonds with them but not to the level of a bromance.

If you only look online for one, I’m interested in learning why.

There are ppl we could be great friends with and develop deeper relationships with if we only had a way of letting them know.

Sometimes ppl want to spend time with someone who has a shared hobby. Or ppl are just depressed. Some need a mentor. Some just need some help getting a few things done. Some want a travel buddy.

What if we found a small group of ppl who were willing to become friends?

It seems the problem shouldnt be hard to fix.

It would be great if there was an app that alerts your when someone had shared interests nearby that almost everyone had. Focus on forming community rather than just one-on-one. Perhaps someone. Sets a time and then ppl RSVP whether they can come and ppl just show up and get to know each other based on a few common qualities.

8 bros, 30ish now, most of us married, some with kids (like me) . we had a bond since college (roomates snd swim team) . Since we are all geographically close enough now, we meet up for a few weekend trips a year, etc and as much as we can for quick get togethers/ sports events. Lately some of the wives have mentioned its too much and want devotion to kids and marriage. I guess my question is …is it time to tone down the bromance? Any Tips for married men to keep the bromance alive? Maybe invite the wives on a few weekend camping trips to make it more inclusive on occasion?

I believe one of the best and maybe one of the most important forms of relationship a guy can have is a close friendship with another guy, and I think we don't talk about that enough.

A lot of men get caught up in the whole competitiveness aspect, but imagine if we all used that energy to instead focus on fostering brotherhood? Of course trusting anyone blindly is never good practice, but I think we need to make an effort to at least see other men as potential brothers ("potential" being the keyword) and approach them as such.

For us to find bromance we need to normalize men supporting men. Bromance is, after all, about emotional intimacy and openness. How can we expect to find close male friendships if we don't show other men they have our support or that they can come to us? If those men are good people, that support will be reciprocated in some shape or form.

And once that closeness is built, you have one of the most awesome and wholesome relationships one can experience. I'm not talking about anything romantic. I'm not talking about anything s3xual. I'm talking about brotherly love. If you've experienced it, you know what I mean and you know the huge positive impact it would collectivelly have on men's mental health if it became the norm.

Men understand each other and we bond over the things that we have in common. That's important. We need people who are like us, who understand us, who go through what we go through. Men need men too.

That's why I think places that discuss and foster male friendships like r/bromance are important and we shouldn't let them die down. We need to keep spreading this kind of message out there and act on it in real life.

The type of male/male mutually requited love where you can tell they really love each other and are each others fav person to do things with, talk to, be vulnerable wit (I think family members and actual fwb/close occasional fling count too) sexual orientation doesn’t matter

My picks:

-JD and Turk in Scrubs -Jim and Dwight around the end of The Office (Dwight wanted a hug on the stairway from Jim but Jim never knew) -Mac and Dennis from IASIP (Dennis knows Mac’s tendencies towards him but doesn’t care and knows him so well) -Technically all 4 from Seinfeld will lie and scheme for each other, even Elaine counts as a bro -Joey and Chandler from Friends -Will and Carlton from Fresh Prince of Bel-Air (perfect “brother” relationship) -Niles and Fraiser in Fraiser (they literally only like to hang wit each other just talking)

Hey all!

To start off with, I just wanted to say that I'm often not trying to find connections on this sub any more for various reasons.

However I wanted to ask which of the following is the biggest red flag you look out for with regards to 'ulterior motives' here (that people never seem to think we notice!). I totally get that this level of online friendship can sometimes get 'close' but I used to notice a lot of guys seemed to have only 1 motive and just tried to hide it.

Which would you often notice to be the biggest red flags in a post on this sub?

View Poll

Hey guys! Here is the spot to post your, "Looking for a bro" post. Feel free to introduce yourself, age, where you're from, and what. you're looking for in a bro. This will be the only place to post your personal, r4r, or Looking for a bro posts going forward.

After MANY requests we are no longer doing the chat style posts for this thread so just post a comment below. If you have any other suggestions let a mod know. Thanks!

***REMEMBER, KEEP IT SFW OR IT WILL BE DELETED***

I've never had a bromance before but I have heard of them. I am interested and I have a basic understanding about them but I am also very curious about the big No-Nos of a bromance. I would like to know!

I see a lot of posts about guys being ghosted and questions about why it didn't work out. So I thought maybe start at the beginning. Who actually did find a bromance here. I am really curious.

I lost a bro awhile ago(died).. He appeared in a dream today, and as I was waking up from that dream, I heard his voice "You aint out here arguin' on the internet is you?" He said something else after that, but his voice faded away and it was incomprehensible. It hit me deep. It was like the perfect combination of funny and melancholy. I didn't know whether to cry or laugh.

It is what it is bro. It is what it is.