Hey guys! Here is the spot to post your, "Looking for a bro" post. Feel free to introduce yourself, age, where you're from, and what. you're looking for in a bro. This will be the only place to post your personal, r4r, or Looking for a bro posts going forward.

After MANY requests we are no longer doing the chat style posts for this thread so just post a comment below. If you have any other suggestions let a mod know. Thanks!

***REMEMBER, KEEP IT SFW OR IT WILL BE DELETED***

I've never had a bromance before but I have heard of them. I am interested and I have a basic understanding about them but I am also very curious about the big No-Nos of a bromance. I would like to know!

I see a lot of posts about guys being ghosted and questions about why it didn't work out. So I thought maybe start at the beginning. Who actually did find a bromance here. I am really curious.

Do you think it’s possible for a gay guy and a straight or bi guy to build a solid longterm bromance? As a gay man I don’t have any straight or bi male friends. For some reason straight and bi guys are friendly but never wanna make a longterm connection. I miss the bro energy that I don’t really get from most gay guys. If there are any straight or bi guys that understand please hmu

I lost a bro awhile ago(died).. He appeared in a dream today, and as I was waking up from that dream, I heard his voice "You aint out here arguin' on the internet is you?" He said something else after that, but his voice faded away and it was incomprehensible. It hit me deep. It was like the perfect combination of funny and melancholy. I didn't know whether to cry or laugh.

It is what it is bro. It is what it is.

So Halloween is coming up and i’m a lil annoyed because i’m basically going to miss out on it like i have this whole month, because i can’t find anyone interested in anything horror related or halloween related to do things with. I’m 33 straight and live in Mass I tried finding other straight potential bros here in Mass under 45 yrs old and not only can’t i find a bro into the Horror scene/ halloween scene but i can’t find a bro here at all, like here in New England we have a thing called spooky world or fright fest at six flags and i haven’t ever been to any of those places yet because i can’t find anyone to go with which sucks. I’m starting to notice that it’s hard finding a potential bros in Mass like they act interested but they are flaky and fickle on reddit and in real life and they aren’t serious either idk a lot of them just waste your time. I feel like if stay living here in Mass i won’t ever meet a potential bro. i don’t Know in my opinion it seems like guys from other location like NY, CT, Philly, Nj, FL, CHI, seem more interested in being a bro then the guy’s here which is cool but it’s harder to chill and build that bond, maybe this is like a sign for me to move out of here or something lol.

So have any of you guys that live in CT, RI, NY, Nj, Philly, FL, DMV, find it hard finding potential bros or do you find it easy? Only asking these places because these locations have a good amount of traffic for ppl but anybody from any location can answer this question as well

Everyone who is into halloween or the horror scene, what did you do/ have planned for spooky season with your bro or with other ppl you hang with?

Nowadays, it’s hard to find a decent bromance. Guys just aren’t truly into it. Or at least the ones I’ve come across.. I grew up in a two parent household as an only child. But when I was 14, I lost my dad and my mom was left to raise me on her own. I had a couple friends growing up, but honestly they never really cared for me as much as I cared for them. I guess in a way I was craving that male connection and till this day I continue to crave it. It’s hard to not get discouraged.. but with what I’ve been through on pages such as these after thinking I finally found my bro.. I get attached and ultimately crushed cause for them it didn’t mean anything.. it gets frustrating! I’ve never felt like I was an attractive guy, and I’ve always had body issues.. but when guys who you try to establish a genuine bromance with out of the blue tell you “Nah you ain’t my type”, it truly hurts. It’s almost like they have no heart or even recognize that at the end of the day, I am a human with feelings.. I give up a lot, I can’t lie. Most because at the end of the day, I never truly feel loved and that desire for a connection with another bro never works out. I feel like I’ve come to the conclusion that it will never happen. And I’m ok with it. Sorry but like many on here.. I just had to release my frustrations..

Hey guys, in a few months I'm teaching a college course on masculinity that I've titled "bro studies." The short version is that I'm trying to get students (and especially college guys) to think seriously about the social expectations/norms/pressures/etc that come along with masculinity. The official goal is "critical thinking" but the quieter goal is that I want to make space for students to recognize the range of relationships, identities, and ways of living that are available to them.

I'm trying to find some stuff I can assign besides academic reading, especially movies or shows that have positive portrayals of masculinity. R/bromance seems like a subreddit where folks might have some good suggestions for this. If this were your syllabus what would you have your students watch?

A little about me, first. I'm straight autistic male (41) who has overcome trauma with God, much therapy, and research. Most of my male friends lasted a short time. i think, like any relationship, coming into it broken will distort your expectations. I wanted someone to replace the hole my dad left and heal the damage from csa. I wanted someone to automatically pick up and adjust to my neurodiversity with full understanding. I wanted a lot of things i needed to give myself. I wanted a caregive; someone to lead the friendship. And then when that person didn't meet my expectations, my disappointment exacerbated our clear differences.

So I think getting into a bromance, a genuine healthy one, you and that other person have to have a measure of wellness and self-acceptance going in. The things we lack will be there but might just be healed by the friendship.

I'm still not sure I can tolerate that much of a person in my life, sadly

I am an introvert to the point where it can be categorized as social awkwardness. I am shy, and making small talk feels like climbing a mountain for me.
My father never took much interest in life, and my mother mostly raised us as a single parent. I have always longed to have a brother or a male friend I could rely on.
At times, small things seem like huge tasks to me, and I deeply wish I had an older or even a younger male sibling.

My closest bro looks like a bearded woman. I'm not joking. He literally looks like a beautiful bearded woman. We've been bros for over 20 years now. Every time I tell him, he always responds with "YOU DONT MAKE ENOUGH MONEY FOR ME TO BE THAT FOR YOU". Hes the first man i've ever seen that if you look at'em, you see a woman first. and then a man, it blows my mind.

married dads finding bromances can be such a struggle. Make sure to support your fellow dads. We’re the only ones who truly understand the struggles. We know how hard it is to keep those pre kid friendships going.

So it took me a while to I figured it that I was gay, but I always wanted a deep connection to my male friends.I saw bromances in movies and I knew, that's what I want. After my coming out , some friends started being some distance because I was gay. Women can touch each other's boobs and kiss, but it you sit to close to a guy you're gay... So yes, I'm finally having a friend I would call a bro if he wouldn't dislike the term... we are close as can be without a romantic interest, but damn is it hard to get to the point because of all those stereotypes and societal standards that are so homophobic and other trash, sorry had to vent a bit...

When I did a DNA test for my dog, I was surprised by something: the results identified her closest match as a first-degree relative, meaning either a parent OR a sibling. This is probably really obvious to a lot of you guys, but non-identical siblings share about 50% of their DNA, just like you share 50% with each parent. I rhought our parents were our strongest genetic connection, but in reality, a brother shares just as much DNA with us as a father does, and that biological link is significant. When it comes to finding a chosen brother, we’re striving for something equally powerful. It’s not just finding a friend, it’s finding someone who feels as close to you as blood, even though you might come from entirely different backgrounds.

Whether we’re lucky enough to have strong relationships with our biological brothers or not, the search for a chosen brother is deep and a serious pursuit. When you find a man who fits seamlessly into your life, it can almost feel like you were meant to have been born from the same womb. There’s something powerful about the way these bonds form, they light up something primal inside. A chosen brother should ideally have a connection with you that feels even deeper than romance.

Brothers are there for life. They’re connected to you in a way that transcends the ups and downs of romantic relationships. A brother, in this sense, is more enduring than a spouse. This is why I’d argue that men who marry men should marry their bro. If you’re making that commitment to be together forever, why not marry the man who already has your back in the deepest, most natural way? As men, we have the rare chance to forge that kind of bond, to marry a brother, not biological, but in spirit.

And that’s what makes the miracle of brotherhood so profound, it’s a relationship based on choice, not obligation. A chosen brother will stand by you even more fiercely because he’s decided to be there. That’s the miracle, and it’s well worth the wait.

My best friend is 11 years older than I am, and I'm closest to them. It's been such a wholesome experience and we've completed a decade of being such close friends. I've certainly learned so much from my best friend and we've seen each other through all highs and lows and every life stage.

Today, I'm heading back to the Uni, I'm getting home soon ( I'm in the minibus right now) Two guy friends got in the bus and they are sitting with each other. One of them put his arm on the others' one shoulders. I have my friend sitting next to me and I know that he don't like if I did this to him too. Seeing this make me feel that I need a close bromantic friend or even a close guy friend that I can make this with him too.... I'm 20 And the other boys I think are between 23 years old. What do u think about this?..

All of you out there, just felt like showing some love. I hope everyone’s having a good Friday, and if you’re suffering or going through anything, take care of yourself by loving yourself and others even more. Let’s sow love and reap love my bros 🫂❤️

Hey Bros, Im a 36M. Im a pretty normal dude, married, and we have a lot of married couples that we hang with. But id like to start investing in some friendships at this stage in my life. But as an adult im not used to spending one on one time with my guy friends. It kinda makes me nervous. I recently had a bro reach out and ask if i wanted to come over and hang and watch a movie. But i declined because i was nervous and ive never done that before. Ive gone golfing and went to a ball game with guy friends before. I guess im a little insecure about the whole thing. So how do i overcome this and foster a good relationship with another dude?

I know we’re on Reddit and everything is weird haha but… when I look at this sub it seems like guys secretly in love with their friends or people trying to have a friendship built on desires that friends usually don’t have towards eachother… does everyone see a bromance as crossing those lines or it’s it just a normal close friendship to some as well?

Judgement-free jamming to tracks😅
https://www.instagram.com/p/C-gXdUIhgRU/
https://www.instagram.com/p/C_tpLnkOrpR/

As this article explains, https://www.wsj.com/lifestyle/careers/young-american-men-lost-c1d799f7 , young men are feeling lost, isolated, and stuck at home. Bromance and brotherhood can help fill this gap, but us older guys need to step up as mentors. I’m curious to hear how you think we, as older bros, can connect with younger dudes, even when we don’t always relate. I’ll be honest I find this hard when a younger bro reaches out. This article has really made me think about how I should behave when a younger dude reaches out. Encouraging them to bond and helping them find their tribe can make a difference. Do you think older brothers should take on a mentoring role? Are you willing to do this? Are you a younger bro in need of support?

Hey my bros. I really hope everyone is okay with all the crazy stuff going on. Mental health wise, emotionally, physically. Sometimes extra love can go a long way. Hugs to you guys 🫶🏾🫂

So I haven’t really had many bromances only about 2 but I always seem to enjoy when it’s with someone significantly older than me (22). Maybe it’s because I gain more knowledge do to their experiences in life I don’t know but it just always seems to be the case where older bros tend to stick to me more.

In my previous post about marriage to men with additional bromance, I noticed a lot of comments from guys defending the idea that their bro can never be the same dude as their husband. This sparked an interesting conversation, so I wanted to dive deeper into the topic.

A lot of you are saying that marriage and bromance have to be separate—that you need different people to fulfill different needs. But let’s be honest for a second. Why are so many of us comfortable with compartmentalizing our lives this way? Why settle for a marriage where you still feel the need to find a deeper connection with a “bro” outside of it? If that’s the case, isn’t that a sign something might be missing?

Friendships are important, and we all need our circles. But I can’t help wondering, why not aim for a partnership where your spouse fulfills those deeper roles too? It’s almost like some people are scared to admit they married someone who doesn’t fully meet their needs, and instead of confronting that, they’ve decided it’s normal to keep bromance and marriage separate.

I’m not passing judgment on anyone’s choices. I just think it’s worth thinking about. If your marriage is rock solid, that’s great. But if you find yourself constantly searching for that deeper connection with a bro, maybe it’s time to ask yourself why that person wasn’t the one you built your life with in the first place.

I think there’s something to be said for holding out for the person who checks all the boxes—romantically, socially, emotionally. Maybe that’s uncomfortable to think about, but it’s a conversation worth having and the choice I made.

Hey guys! Here is the spot to post your, "Looking for a bro" post. Feel free to introduce yourself, age, where you're from, and what. you're looking for in a bro. This will be the only place to post your personal, r4r, or Looking for a bro posts going forward.

After MANY requests we are no longer doing the chat style posts for this thread so just post a comment below. If you have any other suggestions let a mod know. Thanks!

***REMEMBER, KEEP IT SFW OR IT WILL BE DELETED***

I want to share a story that sums up a problem with the contemporary straight male experience.

This story is from a friend of mine. Her cousin and his best friend went to the beach. They played with a bat and ball and went swimming. They were gone for over an hour. They came back with angry red patches all over their backs, totally sunburned. Their faces and fronts were ok.

My friend asked why they didn't just apply sunscreen to eachothers backs? They said it was "too gay".

Two straight dudes. Old friends. And the fear of being perceived, even for a moment - by strangers, or by each other - to be gay - caused them more discomfort than actual sunburn.

I know many guys aren't this uptight. But this is real, and I see this kind of thing all the time. The fear of stepping out of line, of the risk of being perceived as gay is so deeply entrenched in male cultures. And men police themselves and each other - homophobia is a self policing curse.

Men are lonely. Men are hurting, and hurting each other. It's gotta end - and I hope it does in the coming generations.

(I'd like to add that I've had friends - straight girls and guys, gays, lesbians and bi's - put sunscreen on my back and it never once turned into a slippery erotic scene. It blows my mind that people can be so narrow, but hey, here we are. In 2024.)

Be straight and don't be afraid of how you are perceived. Be bi and don't be afraid. Be gay and don't be afraid. Just don't be afraid... and don't get fuckin' sunburned.

I wanted to share my experience with bromance as a straight guy, and how society's views on male friendship are really twisted, especially in America.

Growing up, I always felt like there was this stigma attached to straight guys forming meaningful connections with other dudes. In high school, my closest friend and I developed what I would call my definition of a "bromance." It was the kind of friendship where we didn’t have to hold back, and we could talk about anything without judgment. You know how some friendships feel shallow, like there are invisible boundaries you don’t cross? Ours didn’t have those walls.

We were super comfortable around each other. Honestly, we even chilled in the nude sometimes—nothing sexual about it. There was no awkwardness or shame. We trusted each other so much that if one of us had something private going on, like a hemorrhoid (yeah, not glamorous, but real talk), we would actually examine it for each other. We’d even help each other trim our pubes if needed. It was purely about helping a friend out, with zero sexual undertones.

The thing is, society has conditioned us to believe that any sort of physical closeness between men must have some hidden sexual meaning. That’s the toxic culture we live in. But I truly believe that as men, we crave bonding with other men in a way that women can’t fulfill. I’m not saying women aren’t amazing companions—they absolutely are—but there’s a different level of understanding and connection that comes from a bromance. It’s primal, and it’s natural.

Unfortunately, American culture tends to put a lot of shame on male closeness. There’s this immediate assumption that if you’re too close to another guy, it’s “gay.” But bromance has nothing to do with that. I’m straight, and my bro was too, but we had a connection that went beyond what society thinks men should be allowed to have.

I think it’s time to break down that stigma. Bromances should be celebrated, not shamed. Because at the end of the day, we all need someone we can trust, rely on, and bond with—without society’s baggage hanging over us

Just watched Challengers (available on Amazon Prime) and it was giving hardcore bromance vibes. The two male characters talk about meeting at school and becoming fast friends before having a falling out and then reuniting. Have you watched it? Do you agree? What other movies would you classify as bromance?

Take this: two men in their forties, neighbours, married, with children, are really closed friends, like bros. One day, one of them declares he wants some distance, there is too much closeness. They still see each other daily as nothing has happened. Any explanation for that?

I've never really thought about this while in school, as friendship just grows naturally there. However, having moved to a completely different country and trying to rebuild my social circles again (and it's difficult for sure), I'm wondering if there is a more direct way to communicate this.

I do believe friendship takes time to grow. And as an adult, time is often limited, and building new friendship often takes a back seat. Unless we are already doing something regularly, texting/ calling/ meeting in person is really the only way to have a consistent communication that could lead to a deeper friendship. And generally, I'm happy to initiate this as much as I can to keep the friendship going.

Having said that, how do I know that what my initiation is welcome and appreciated? I've been on the receiving end myself by repeatedly getting messages that I don't exactly relate, and I don't quite know how to tell the other person either about this.