I'm curious to know how the majority of people really feel about their in-laws. Most posts i see here are about negative and honestly adversarial experiences, interactions, and relationships (which makes sense, maybe nobody wants to brag about their positive experiences). But it has caused me to have a skewed perspective on how people feel about their in-laws, MILs in particular.

Would like for all different people to sound off here.

I understand this may be reductive but which view do you think best represents your thinking and feeling?

A) I have a mostly positive relationship with my in-laws. I appreciate their help with caretaking and I hughly value their relationship/bond with my baby.

B) I have a mostly neutral relationship with my in-laws. I could take or leave their help; I'm satisfied with their relationship/bond with my baby.

C) I have a mostly negative relationship with my in-laws. I don't want their help or find they are unhelpful, and I dont wish for my baby to have a close relationship/bond with them

Details if you want, but I am just curious to see where people fall on the distribution !

I am so annoyed. My MIL has been staying with us the past few days and while she’s a nice lady, she does have a tendency to make the occasional out of line comment or provide unsolicited advice. While visiting she quickly asked if my 4 week old took a paci when we mentioned his crying and I said he did, but we don’t like to offer it too often. Our baby likes to be held 24/7 so we have been splitting up our usual shifts with her in the mix, and I realized on day 2 that she had been giving him the paci very frequently to the extent that I felt it was delaying feeds. My husband had also upped his paci use from her influence and totally denied it had any impact on delaying feeds. Cue today, he is demanding the paci or boob basically any moment he’s awake and is comfort sucking significantly longer- feeds are now going up to 90min when they were previously max 45. He also started having an issue with formula which we use in the evening when he tends to demand more, so I really need the additional time to pump but I can’t because I’m being sucked dry from his constant comfort sucking. To top it off, when she’s holding him and he starts crying she tries to comfort him even after I’ve asked to take him and often explained that I don’t want her to do whatever she’s doing (like feeding him the paci) when I know he wants food. I have to ask 2-3x and make it clear I want my baby and am not messing around before she hands him over, which I find unacceptable.

This is mostly just a rant but if anyone has advice, I’ll take it. I’m not against my baby using the pacifier and actually prefer he sleep with it in the bassinet to prevent SIDS, but I don’t want it to be a constant dependence on suckling, especially while awake.

My daughter is 4.5 months old and it feels like we've been dealing with teething pain off and on for a month now. Tons of drooling, wants to chew on EVERYTHING, occasional swollen gums. She also has been dealing with a sleep regression that seems to have messed with her naps but left night sleep alone. Well the last week or so she's taken to any time she wakes from sleep she just starts hysterically crying and it takes a good decent bit of effort to calm her down enough to where she opens her eyes and realizes she's ok.

Normally she'll get a good long stretch of sleep from 830-9ish to 330 without interruption. Tonight though she suddenly woke at midnight hysterically screaming and crying. We tried oragel, a bottle, tylenol, tried getting her to wake up. 20 mins later she finally settled and I've only just got her back to sleep after about half an hour. Could this be teething pain that woke her up?? The poor girl just seemed soooo upset and inconsolable 😭😭 Is there anything else we can do to help her?

Hello parents! First-time parent here. I have been ferrying my new born to-and-fro doctor’s appointments and chose to use a car seat for safety.

I would like to check if he is positioned well here? This is the smallest seat belt position I can adjust to and can’t help but feel that he still looks uncomfortable or in a poor position.

Will appreciate any positioning tips or guides!

I know, obviously when they’re a newborn. My LO was overdue and cooked a bit longer so her skin is a little flakey and cracked. I also don’t know what her sleep cycles will look like over the next 2 weeks.

Is there an optimal time (ex. day 8-12) when I should get the pictures done or is it all really the same? Maybe they look a little cuter once they’re more than just a couple days old?

FTM, please let me know if I’m overthinking or if it’s a valid question😂

My son is 14 months old and I really need to wean him off bottles. He gets one in the morning and one to help him fall asleep. He rejected the transition bottles and I’ve tried many different sippy cups for milk but he dribbles and makes a huge mess. How do I get him off the bottles while also making sure he is getting the milk intake he needs?

This is the second time that someone from the broader family circle mentioned that I've gained some weight after having my baby 8 months ago. I'm here crying like an idiot at 7 am because of this stupid comment. I'm also crying for the body that I've lost. A body that was lean and fit before pregnancy.

I keep telling myself that I'll try to get back into exercising, but my baby's still not a great sleeper and l simply can't find the energy to do that. Being ashamed of my body is a new feeling that I'm finding difficult to come to terms with.

My son turned 2 weeks this week and ever since he will not sleep in the evenings… we’ve tried everything and he’s basically been wide awake from 6pm until 10pm. He’ll fall asleep for like 5 minutes and then bam he’s wide awake again. My first baby was not like this at all so I have no idea what to do and I know this is way too long of a wake window for his age. He sleeps at night okay, waking for his feedings and then right back down. Also naps good during the day. It’s just been as soon as the evening hits, he’s awake. Is this normal for a newborn? It’s stressing me out.

We've got a 2 month old and a 2 year old. My spouse is a great dad and we're 50/50 parents when he's home from work, but I'm solo for ~60 hours during the week and sometimes it's really tough (as I'm sure you're all aware!!)

I just got my first pp period and I feel like I'm dying. And of course the kids had a high needs day on top of that. When my husband got home from work he said I looked miserable and suggested I go take a long shower. I took him up on that offer and had a 45 minute shower with the door locked. It was magical.

When I walked into the kitchen afterwards there was a big mess and my husband looked frantic! Apparently the baby cried the whole time and the toddler pulled down a bunch of stuff from the counter top, including the food waste bin, and had a 20 minute long meltdown.

Y'all, my husband looked at me and said, "Don't you ever let anyone tell you this isn't a full time job. You are strong and brave and amazing for doing this every day."

It's nice to be recognized sometimes.

I stopped breastfeeding when my LO was 1 month old. Suddenly I’ve noticed milk leaking from my nipples when I’m in the shower. I’m TTC but took a negative test yesterday, so pregnancy isn’t a factor. Has this happened to anyone?

I’m currently laying in bed crying because although somewhere in me wants to be completely done with breastfeeding and just do bottles my heart is also breaking at the thought of it.

The last month or so I’ve been trying to get my LO who will be 6 months old on the 28th used to bottles again. He’s been refusing formulas, all the bottles we have, my freezer stash, my fridge milk and even sometimes my freshly pumped milk. Although freshly pumped we’ve had the most success with, he still wouldn’t drink enough for a feed. I’m trying to reintroduce bottles because we plan on going on a trip in June and I wanted the option to be able to kind of flex feed him for the airport/plane and any activities we do while we’re there.

All of my pumped milk has come from my left boob. He has never latched on it but a handful of times since birth and I’ve been pumping it around the clock. It has gotten the best of me. And since trying for 2 weeks to get him to take my freezer stash without success I’ve decided to slowly just let that side dry up. I tried finding other people who had done the same and the very little experiences I did find were half and half. Some people said they were able to do it and still have supply in the one baby preferred and someone said they lost both.

I’ve noticed him recently start popping on and off during nursing and just fussing and crying. I have to stick it back in his mouth at least 5 times during a session and they’re getting shorter and shorter. We’re down to 4 minutes a session for about 8-9 a day. This happened a couple weeks ago but he returned to his normal sessions and wasn’t as fussy however I wasn’t directly trying to diminish my supply in my left side then.

This evening he was doing it and I was convinced he had to still be hungry. Gave him a bottle of 2 oz expressed milk from my haaka and a scoop of formula and he drank it like a champ after nursing for 4 minutes. Did I ruin my supply by trying to drop my pumps on my left side and let it dry up? Has anyone had similar experience with the fussiness during nursing at this point and was it a supply issue or just a phase?

I was in Montréal last weekend to visit and for the eclipse, staying downtown. My 3 month-old wasn’t sleeping particularly well at the hotel, so we would wake up on the earlier side relative to our travel companions.

Monday morning was particularly mild weather and my daughter was on the fussy side, so I took her out for a mid-morning walk while we were waiting for the others to get ready. We were only walking a few blocks and I was trying to calm her, so I just carried her in my arms.

I passed a lady who called out several times asking if we were okay. I responded that we were. She approached nearer (though still maintaining a distance), and admired the baby, but then explained if the police saw me carrying the baby in my arms they would suspect me of child endangerment or possibly kidnapping, that I should always take the baby out in the stroller instead. I was spooked enough I just walked back to the hotel, but am still not clear whether it was actually illegal (which doesn’t sound right at all??), just not the Done Thing, or if she was just pulling her advice out of thin air.

I tried to google it but any combination of “legal”, “carrying”, and/or “arms” was just returning Canadian gun laws. But it’s still bothering me. Is there anyone from Montréal/Québec/Canada who can clarify for me?

Edit: Thank you all! I am very relieved (and my curiosity satiated) to have it confirmed this is not a thing.

I am 8mo PP. We have had sex once PP and honestly i can’t recall how or why. We barely did it at all while pregnant, so it’s truly been a year? year and half? I don’t know.

I have prolapse. Sex was often painful before i even got pregnant. I have no libido but simultaneously still have sexual thoughts an desire if that makes any sense at all. I feel like I will never have sex again. I feel like my life as a sexually active woman is gone. I am not even 30 years old yet. This just feels so unfair. I am praying that once i am done breastfeeding and my depression gets a bit better, my sex drive will come back????

Hi all. I would really appreciate some advice because I’m feeling quite emotional, confused, hurt, and I don’t know what to do.

I’m a FTM and 6 weeks postpartum with a beautiful baby girl and I love her so much I can’t imagine life without her. My mother, who is a retired midwife, has come by since I have birth to help with the baby and me and to also teach me about baby care. We’re not western so this is common for us. But things have been very rough between me and my mom ever since I gave birth.

For example, I try to breastfeed but I don’t make enough milk so we supplement with formula. In the early weeks, this led to the baby developing preference for the bottle teat rather than my nipple. The hospital nurse suggested feeding the formula with a spoon to hopefully make her prefer my breast again. One evening, my baby was colic and crying nonstop. She was hungry but she refused the breast, and I tried to feed her with spoon which she also refused. My mother said this is ridiculous and that I should just give the bottle. I asked her, while freaking out because the baby was crying, if that didn’t make things worse. This made my mom blow up at me. She asked why am I trying to prove myself to this baby? That I am just like those parents who kill their kids and don’t regret it because they think they own the child, and that I’m overbearing for wanting to breastfeed and disrespectful to formula fed children. This wasn’t even about formula. At that point I gave the bottle which the baby rejected but finally drank from after some coaxing.

I told my mother her words hurt me and that I never want to kill my child. I just thought I should follow the protocol I was given. She told me she stands by what she said and that spoon and syringe feeding are only done if the mother is unavailable and only for a couple of days.

Fast forward to this week. My baby now also accepts breast as well as bottle and drinks without a problem. I still do a mix of breast and formula cause my supply is low and the baby is carefully monitored by the pediatrician. Problem is, she has developed baby acne. At first my mom didn’t accept that it might be acne so we took her to the pediatrician and she confirmed it is indeed baby acne. My mother however still thinks it’s an allergic reaction caused by my breast milk. Why? Because, according to her, my diet is poor and I eat too many sugary things hence the acne. I was also told to stop kissing the baby cause my lips are dirty and make the acne worse.

She has also criticized me a lot for not being able to soothe the baby as well as she does. This has made me dread being around the baby cause I feel helpless when she cries so I try to keep my distance and only hold her to feed. So my mother told me she feels incredibly sorry for my child cause she has a parent like me who dreads to be around her.

All this and more has made me think maybe she really is better off without me. I love my child and I don’t want to damage her. I’ve been thinking maybe I should put her up for adoption. But I don’t know if I’m strong enough to do that and my mother has called me crazy for it. I don’t know what to do anymore. I just don’t want my baby to suffer because of my issues.

I will be 2 years postpartum next month from my first vaginal delivery. There were minor complications. I was induced, labored for about 16 hours, and my daughter came out sunny side up. I had a first degree tear, they stitched me up, and that was it. My daughter did poop while I was in labor and came out not breathing, however, all checked out and she was fine.

I noticed 6-8 weeks postpartum that it looked like there was a ball in my vaginal opening. Doc never mentioned anything, seemed like it was just healing. Never thought much of it afterwards. However, I have now noticed what looked like postnatal granulation tissue. About six months ago I felt a “pop” sensation when sitting down on the couch. Shortly after, my husband and I were intimate and it was painful. No other issues.

Tonight, I checked out my lady bits (last period was a bit painful to insert a tampon and it felt like my vagina was ripped to my butt… it’s not) and noticed what looked like scar tissue pushing out. I’ve been with my husband for ten years, and it looks nothing like an STD/STI. It is flesh colored and doesn’t hurt… just feels like it’s protruding. I’m calling my OBGYN Monday.. but I’m sort of freaking out? Anyone else deal with this?

Dad can't feed him and LO gets out of control fussy once babe realizes that there isn't a feed, soothe, sleep rhythm with dad yet. Dad will be staying home and I am concerned about baby getting down for naps...will end up screaming crying for hours/overtired because mom+boob aren't present. Encouragement, thoughts, experiences welcome!

Sorry I post so much in this sub, i'm a single ftm and I feel so lost and I don't want her pediatrician to hate me if I call her too much with silly things.

I have been combo feeding since birth since she was very small and my milk came in late. Now my milk is in and i'm trying to breastfeed more during the day and keep formula at night so she can sleep longer stretches. But I am having the hardest time with breastfeeding. She latches just fine, will feed for 5-10 minutes before completely passing out. At this point I'll assume she's full and put her to bed or hold her and she'll wake up 5 minutes later hungry. At first I was just repeating the process on each side to fill her up but it seems like she's never satisfied until I finish it off with a bottle of formula.

I am totally okay with combo feeding long term and giving her a bottle after breastfeeding if necessary, but it's getting hard to stay motivated with breastfeeding because it takes 30-40 minutes to get her full and she's still supplementing vs maybe 10 with just formula

I'm getting a hands free breast pump soon so if that works out I may just exclusively pump but I would really prefer just giving it to her from the tap to avoid the extra step and washing bottles twice a day if possible lol

I just have to say I LOVE baby wearing. I wear my 3 month old for hours a day and have had a great PP period.

I twisted my ankle and didn't wear her for a fee day and those days I was more stressed and just down.

Today I started to wear her and it's just such a warm and natural feeling. I feel more relaxed and in tune. I think baby wearing can help w PPD.

I’m a first time mom with the privilege of a having a husband that can support the both of us financially. I have been on maternity leave for 12 weeks and ending soon. I’m kinda excited to go back?? Feeling guilty and def holding my baby and little more than usual- but there is a part of me that is excited to be back with my students/work.

I’m a teacher and would have to “pay for the sub” if I continue to take time off. There are 7 weeks of the school year left- should I just stay home or go back for this short time before summer?? Fellow teacher moms- advice pls!!!

My daughter will be turning 2 years old and has fine textured curls that I would categorize as between 3B and 3C. She has tight, springy ringlets that make her hair look very short, although it is past her shoulders when you stretch a curl out. Without a picture, I'd compare hers to just a bit tighter than Shirley Temple. About the size of a small sharpie per curl.

None of us are of color and I've been doing okay with using curly shampoo and conditioner from Cantu and a moisturizing detangling to comb through properly, starting at the ends and finger detangling etc. My hair only has very slight waves and the same with my husband.

What else can I do to help it knot get so tangled/frizzed? What would help her hair look even healthier?

I have received so many shirt/sweater - pants combos from people as gifts and have absolutely no idea what to do with them.

My LO is exclusively a footed-sleeper/onesies kind of baby. I tried putting pants on her a few times but they slide down, expose too much skin and require socks that never stay on.

Does anyone actually dress their babies in pants before they start crawling?

I am 7 weeks post partum and my back is KILLING me. What causes that? My boobs used to be a small C and now they’re a DD or bigger and filled with milk so is that it? It’s like my whole back but actually worse higher than lower. Is there any other reason? It’s pretty bad and I never had back pain really before much if at all.

I’ve cleaned the straps on our highchair multiple times but they stink. What are you doing to clean yours? How are you making sure you get all the little bits of food? I’m a ftm so I have no clue what the best methods are.

FTM, baby wants to breastfeed, I can express colostrum & my milk is coming in but can’t get baby to latch.

She has a strong suck on finger and bottle.

She doesn’t open mouth wide enough and always has her hands at her mouth in the way.

Any tips or resources would be helpful

I’m a little over 3 months postpartum and I work from home. l’ve accepted that it’s just going to take time (and I’ll need to stop pumping) to get rid of this extra belly fat. My body has never been this shape before and I just don’t know how to dress it. I’m going to a work conference at the end of the month and obviously none of my old work clothes fit anymore. I’ve gone out and tried on so many things, but nothing makes me feel confident and I don’t want to keep buying things on Amazon hoping they fit. Dress for the conference is business casual. What kind of outfits are you all wearing to work? What stores are a better fit for these postpartum bodies?

I have a tiny almost 2 week old little girl, and it seems like she is constantly leaking out of her diapers. I fluff the ruffle part out and I get them on pretty tight, i keep switching back and forth from newborn to preemie because she seems a bit too big for preemie (she's under 6lb but they are tight on her and she wiggles a lot so they come undone and slide down her butt lol) but she leaks in both of them.

I've used both Huggies and pampers and it doesn't seem to make a difference. I really think she is just between sizes because she leaks out the back of the preemies and out the leg of the newborns (I think? It's hard to tell sometimes I just feel that her onesie is wet)

What am I doing wrong? I know it's going to happen sometimes but it's happening everyday, sometimes more than once. I don't think it's that the diapers are too full, I change her often and I've noticed it happens with her first pee after she's in a new diaper

My 2 month old had her check up today and I learned she hasn't grow much since she was born. She was born at 7 lbs 4 oz, 21 in long, 38 cm head. At her check up, she was 8 lbs 1 oz, 21 in long, 38 1/2 cm head. I'm not sure what I'm doing wrong. She had some jaundice issues early on that caused her to lose a pound in a few days. She was treated and has no more signs of jaundice. She eats 2-3 oz every two hours during the day(Breastfeeding). She goes to bed at 10PM, eat at 2AM and 6AM. She has plenty of wet diapers, poops plenty. She's hitting her milestones(cooing, starting to lift her head, starting to roll over). She should be growing but isn't for some reason. She's seeing a specialist and having some test done next week. I don't understand why she's not growing. It makes me feel like a failure.

just had my second baby and I was really hoping I would be spared the crushing baby blues this time around, but no such luck.

After I gave birth to my first, it was SO much worse than just being extra weepy and out of control of my emotions. For about 7-10 days I experienced extreme anxiety, panic attacks, and a horrible empty/impending doom feeling. It passed quickly and didn’t turn into full fledged PPA or PPD.

I gave birth again a couple days ago and of course after about 36 hours the sinking feeling of doom, and panic, and depression hit me. When I brought it up to my doctor, they mentioned it doesn’t sound like baby blues as usually it’s not that intense. Made me feel pretty scared and alone.

Has anyone else experienced this? Luckily this time around I’m a bit less freaked out because I know it’s going to get better, but I’m still a bit desperate for some strength, hope, and stories from other women right now.

I've always fallen into a pattern of delayed or latent sleep, if I have any time off work. I fall into a natural 3am-12noon sleep pattern. When I have work I struggle to get up in the morning and struggle to go to sleep before midnight, often only getting 5-6 hours during the week. When I do sleep, my sleep is a of good quality and I have plenty energy during waking hours.

I've always accepted this as part of my make-up and not tried too hard to change it. It's not a teenager thing because I am almost 30.

I'm sure there are lots of other people whose circadian rhythm is naturally different from the norm, so did having kids affect this at all?

Obviously I'll need to get up earlier to take kids to nursery or school, but did you also stop sleeping in at weekends due to taking kids to other activities or them waking you up?

Whenever I see videos online of Mums with a schedule for baby/toddler wake windows, it always starts at 7-8am in the morning. When a baby is still having a morning nap, couldn't you just go back to bed then too?

My husband would sleep 9pm-6am usually, which you would think would be great for splitting nights. However, I want to breastfeed so I don't think this will work initially. I'm due in a couple of weeks and really excited. I know my sleep patterns will change drastically but just interested in other people's experiences.

We are looking into our vacation options for next year. Disney or Universal Orlando are at the top of the list. We have never been to Disney but we have been Universal Orlando twice as we are huge Harry Potter fans. Our 3 year old is tall and should be able to go on a decent amount of rides. We are thinking she will definitely be over 42” when we go.

Obviously the 1 year old wouldn’t be able to do much of anything though. We do plan to do a big Orlando trip covering both parks when they are 8-12 years old. Something they can remember and enjoy.

But next year our trip is more for us than them. We took a big vacation for my husband’s 40th birthday so we are doing the same for me. I had wanted to go to Italy but we didn’t save money enough for that trip.

What is it like taking a 1 year old to either place?

Edit: We also thought of doing DisneyLand and Universal LA together instead. Anyone been there?