I need to vent and get some opinions.

I (25M) live in a massive 10-room apartment in the city center with roommates (23-27). It’s a known “party house,” and we host a lot since we have the space for it. One of my roommates, Tom (23M), is driving me up the wall.

He’s been living here for two years but constantly complains—about the noise, the kitchen not being spotless (even if it’s just a couple dishes), the city itself, everything. The thing is, we live in the heart of a busy, tourist-heavy city. Noise is inevitable. The rest of us are used to it and have made compromises for him, but it feels like he’s not budging at all.

For example, my room is under his, and I love playing music (small Sony speakers, nothing crazy). He only ever hears faint bass, but instead of politely asking me to turn it down, he’ll send passive-aggressive texts like, “Is that you, or are we hosting a 100-person rave?” This happened last night (Friday) when we were hosting a party—something he knew about a week in advance. He and his girlfriend knowing this - planned a 6 AM biking trip, but I don’t see why the rest of us have to cater to their early wake-up when we live in a shared space. Especially on a Saturday. Sorry small town buddy but move the f*** away if the city is too much for you. And no honesty I was not even playing the music at full volume I was in my own room showering for 10 minutes getting ready for our house party and that 10 minute song bothered him so much that he has to be passive aggressive about it.

The worst part? His behavior is becoming increasingly aggressive with other things too. He slams dishes to make a point (god forbid he ever has to unload the dishwasher), wakes everyone up when doing kitchen chores, and even yelled racist remarks at a former housemate (who eventually moved out because of him). At this point, I’m just over it. He also constantly makes racist remarks about the multi-culturalism of the city and how it bothers him that “multiculturalism in big cities lack class”.

I feel like when you live with 10 people in a city-center party house, you adapt to the majority, not the other way around. If he hates the noise, the city, everything, why is he even here? How would you handle this?

I was gone for a few weeks and her parents visited. They asked me why the bathroom was a mess and she told them because I don’t clean. I have really bad ADHD and I literally can’t function right if my environment isn’t the way I have it and it’s why I’m prescribed Medication.

Anyways my room is always spotless but her room is dirty and nasty and filled with food , I only take baths but the separate shower she uses is so gross and there’s literally dead Bugs everywhere . She bathed the dog in the tub without telling than blame the mess on me and even worse when I returned there was dog poo all in the house including my room and not a little . She clearly wasn’t taking the dog outside because I do it three times a day.. I litterly clean my room up every morning at 8AM and if I forget it’ll be done before the day is over. She will clean every blue moon and than ask if I need help cleaning and I usually say no because we have two different definitions of clean .

I’m just mad she blamed me for everything and didn’t take any credit to escape her parent’s accountability. It’s infuriating when you try and keep clean than get a message asking why the house was dirty but I told them the truth and they said they will talk to her .

So I have two roommates, one is great and one is the most frustrating person I have ever encountered. I have just graduated uni and have a full time high paying job in healthcare. My roommate who I love, we’ll call her K, is so funny and kind, and I love living with her.

My other roommate, let’s call her D, is in university and while she has a part time job that only pays likely a couple hundred every two weeks, she calls in often and pretty much never goes. The other day she called in so that she could go stay at a hotel with a man she met three days ago. She is obsessed with men, and bases her entire personality and worth on them. It’s the only topic she can talk about, and has let her mental health become so degraded that she threatened suicide because a man who specifically told her he wanted a casual relationship was at the bar. My roommates and I were all friends before we moved in together, and P and D lived together in another house before this summer. We all decided to move in to a super cute/pretty affordable house when split between the three of us because their other house was being sold. D has always been odd, but she has never been a cruel or mean person per-say.

Now, she has created so much extra stress between our friends. She posts indirect often on her stories, and either becomes non verbal or bitchy to us when she is having man struggles. She doesn’t go to class and has actually failed two classes last semester. She doesn’t drive. Not only do we have to deal with her weird moods, which really make me uncomfortable, she does NOTHING around the house. She leaves her shoes in the middle of our tiny entry, she throws her cans and cardboard boxes in our tiny garbage that barely fits just garbage, she lets her leftovers rot in the fridge, she lets her (mean) cat (who I have grown to like) starve and I feed her, clean her litter box and make sure she has water. She talks on the phone all night some nights when I am trying to sleep because I work shift work, she leaves the bathroom disgusting and has never contributed towards toilet paper, paper towel, soap or any other household necessities. When we first moved in she would even use my frozen meat (which is expensive af in this economy) for when she would cook for whatever man was coming over. She has never taken out the garbage, vacuumed, cleaned the kitchen or bathroom or shovelled (which is always my job now). She gives random men our addresses, and even lies that she is too tired to go out with us so that she can have men over to our house. We went to my friends performance, and she swiped on tinder while we were front row. She is so embarrassing when meeting new people.

Anyways I suppose that is the gist even though I could go in forever. I know everyone will likely say to move out when our lease ends in summer. But here is the dilemma: first I loveeeeeeeeeee my house. My room is adorable and cozy and there is a garage, in house laundry, storage and I got to decorate since the other roommates don’t care about it. Second, I love living with P, and I think if I were to move out I would be screwing her over, she has one year of uni after this year and while we didn’t talk about the length of us renting, I suppose it was assumed it would be at least two years. I have mentioned moving out while we rent about D, and she didn’t respond great to the possible suggestion. Third, I would save lots of money splitting rent for another year. I really don’t want to burn bridges with P, and honestly while I have complained a lot in hindsight there could be a lot more messy and loud roommates than D.

Advice/ thoughts would be great. Thank you!

My roommate effectively moved his girlfriend in when I told him I don’t want to live with a couple. He said it’s fine as she’s quiet, and when he’s not here she will just stay in his room. How do I explain to him that this is still not okay?

This is in Florida

So I am allergic to cats, two out of my three roommates have cats. I have brought this up earlier where a reminder letter was sent out about this but nothing changed. As per our lease:

Pet Policy: Pets are not allowed unless the resident has approved ESA documentation on file. Even with approval, animals must remain in your private room and cannot be kept in shared spaces like the common area.

So my question is, would this be grounds for breaking my lease that doesn't have a clause about breaking the lease. My landlord have told me I am not allowed to, but since they aren't enforcing the pet rule and I have clearly stated that I am allergic both to landlord and to roommates what can I do?

For a little background, my older brother (31yo M) and I (23yo F) have lost our parents. We don’t have anyone to fall back on or anywhere else to go. My brother has recently gotten divorced, but was kicked out of the house with his wife about 9 months ago. He moved in with me the day that it happened. My boyfriend is also one of his good friends. They have been friends for about 5 years and I’ve been with my boyfriend for a year.

My brother, my boyfriend, and I got a place together to fit all of us. This seemed like a good idea since my brother needed a place and we all love each other and get along well. Before we moved in I set ground rules that:

1. We do our own dishes. I said that obviously if we are running late or just feeling tired, leaving dishes in the sink wasn’t a big deal as long as they got done in a reasonable amount of time.
2. We don’t eat each other’s food unless explicitly offered to have some.

Well, my brother hasn’t been doing his dishes. Sometimes I just really want a clean house and so I will quickly do his dishes and clean off countertops and such. Or if I have dishes to do I will just throw his in the dishwasher with mine. I got tired of always doing his dishes so I left his alone and only did mine. It took him 4 days or so to finally do his dishes. He never cleans off the countertops or takes out the trash. We’ve lived here for 4 months and I’ve only seen him take out the trash 1 time. If the trash is full he will start stacking stuff on top or leave the trash in the counter. My boyfriend is always taking out the trash and cleaning my brother’s trash off the counters.

Also, I bought the couch. It’s a big couch from the 80’s in great condition and I got it for a steal from this rich couple I know for only $1,000 when they paid $10,000 for it. I absolutely love it. I also bought a 60” tv for the living room and the big wood entertainment center that it sits on. I spent $4,000 on a washer and dryer for us to all use and I bought ALL of the silverware, pots and pans, plates, cups, appliances, dish towels, etc. you get the idea. I basically bought everything that goes in the common areas of the house, because I knew that otherwise, they wouldn’t have been bought. Plus I got to pick the design and everything and I care about those things as the only woman in the house.

We all work at the same place and have the same work days and days off. The only difference is that my brother works overnights and my boyfriend and I works days. My brother has a toddler with his ex wife. I absolutely love her. He has her everyday that we are off. The problem is that he basically sits her in front of the tv in the living room for 12 hours everyday and has her watch movies while he sits on his phone. So the living that I bought everything for is occupied most of the time that I’m off. He was even letting her each food on my couch. I laid down my blankets over the couch to catch the food and stuff that she would drop. So I supplied a table and chair for her since we don’t have a dining area. And he now has her food on the table but she is still near the couch and doesn’t use the chair. She gets her food on the ground and her toys all under the couches and popcorn and different small snacks under the couch as well.

My brother has been diagnosed with huntingtons disease which is the disease our father passed away with. I know this has taken a huge toll on him as it understandably would on anyone. I also might have this disease I just haven’t gotten tested for it. Plus his divorce and working overnights is taking a toll on him but he hasn’t made any efforts to get off nights. We will tell him about job openings during days and he never applies for them.

My brother has been a great brother to me my whole life. Even taking on the roll of a sort of parent like figure when we all lived with my grandparents while my dad was too sick to take care of me while I was in high school. My grandparents are passed away now and we are all each other has as far as family goes. I don’t want to come across too harsh or like I’m mad at him. But I struggle with confrontation and I’m having a hard time trying to figure out how to bring this up to him in the best way possible. Am I over reacting to some things? Or am I being reasonable? What do I say exactly and am I supposed to sit him down somewhere or do I put it all in a message. I need to know exactly how to go about this or I will just continue to deal with it and keep building resentment. Sorry for the extremely long post.

TL;DR. Brother doesn’t do dishes or take out trash or clean counters. His toddler watches tv in the living room all day on our days off work. As well as eats on/near the couch that I bought and love. How do I bring this up to him, exactly, in the best way possible?

People, you need to pick better roommates. Interview them without making any promises. Meet several people, and make a list of your personal priorities so that you discuss things that are important to you:

Any recent history of bedbugs?

Schedule, are they home all the time or out all the time?

Cleaning are we spotless or both a little messy?

Any chemical sensitivity to cleaning agents or colognes?

Meat eaters or vegans, or vegetarians?

Whatever else is important to you. Weed them out before they move in.

Also, money is not everything: If some racist loser was your last and best choice of roommate on the 31st, don't accept! Pay the rent on the room yourself (and enjoy the peace and quiet) and try and rent the room by the 15th, or start of next month. Costs a lot more to kick someone out: half a year or more if they fight eviction, and most times you just get stuck paying for them, or if you decide to leave there are costs to move or costs to break a lease. Also mental anguish. Look early in the month for a new roommate, and try to decide and exchange money for a set of keys at least a week or two before the move in day.

My roommates pile dishes in the garbage disposal side while leaving the other side empty

Like they wash off the plates and neatly stack them directly over the garbage disposal so it’s intentional. You can’t wash anything down and it backs up because the water can’t flow down

Also the dish washer is directly to the right of the sink so idk why they don’t put the dishes in there anyways. I’ll leave it open and pull out the rack to make it extra easy for them

But like I’ll move their dishes to the other side so I can wash food scraps down the garbage disposal but then they’ll move all the plates back to cover it instead of putting in the dish washer or hand washing. And it’ll be there for days

I just started washing food scraps on top of their plates and they’ll loudly yell about it when they go in the kitchen, but won’t say anything to me

Yes I’ve talked to them but they keep doing this

I mean we heard it all the time as kids, surely.

“In or out, pick one” “You’re letting the air out”

My bedroom is directly next to the front door of our house, and I hear this front door open and close like 15 times an hour. I have multiple roommates, but the main culprit is responsible for like 13 of those uses. Numbers are made up, but point remains. Mind you, my roommates have doors to the back of the house inside their rooms they could be using, but the constant in/out occurs all the way across the house at the front door where I am

What’s NOT helping is the fact that our door is messed up and you have to jiggle it to get it to open, so hearing that all day is extra annoying. But our air also acts up because it’s a larger house, and the constant in and out doesn’t help that at all.

Like they buy the expensive bougie toilet paper, paper towels, dishwasher pods, scented trash bags from target

I buy the bulk paper towel and toilet paper from Costco or Amazon etc

Their stuff is 2-3x the price of what I usually buy and without asking me they buy it and then want me to split it. I keep trying to compromise with them but they only want the expensive stuff

Hi so a few days ago the back door stopped working, basically meaning we couldn’t access the garden. It’s an old wooden door so it’s probably because of warping and wood rot. I was going to report it to the agency but I was dealing with other stuff and I didn’t have time. The agency is also really bad at fixing things from previous experience, so I was getting ready to argue with them again (in the past they tried to blame us for things that are literally their responsibility to fix.)

Well my housemate and her bf wanted to use the garden last night, and I told them they can’t access it. I wake up today and the back door is wide open, with the wooden panel that was holding the door shut on the ground. I confronted my housemate and she said her bf forced open the door- she claims she didn’t realise anything broke off. I’m so annoyed, especially because we had problems with her in the past with her being messy and trying to guilt trip us to get out of cleaning.

She said she’d try to glue the panel back on but if it doesn’t work I’ll have to report it to the agency. She doesn’t want me to blame it on them, but it’s obvious that the door was forced open because only the part that has the lock tore off. I don’t want to lie because won’t they just make us all pay for repairs/take our deposits? Her bf is some rich guy and he probably doesn’t even care, but the other housemates and I are not that well off and we can’t afford to pay just because he insisted on using the garden. It wasn’t even for something important, they could’ve literally walked to the field close to our house to stargaze instead. Ughhhhh

My roommate brought over a felon last night. I know I sound like a bitch typing that out, but he has charges for armed burglary, harassment, assault, etc. He’s 30 and my roommate is 20. He admitted to her that he has mingled with minors “in the past”. She met this dude at his friend’s house, his friend is 46, and has known my roommates best friend for 5 years now. My roommates best friend is 20. They fucked that night. When my other roommate and I tried to explain how that is grooming, and very sick, she denied any “bad intentions” on his end and said that both guys are pretty chill.

We live in a house in the woods, three females, alone. This man got out of jail four months ago.

I’m pissed. On the verge of breaking my lease and moving back in with family until I find my own place. Am I overreacting?

My other roommate and I are 23, and try to look out for the 20 year old. She absolutely does not listen. I don’t know what to do anymore. Last time she brought a man over, they ended badly and she was afraid he’d show up and do something to her so she went to stay with her mom for a few days, and left us to basically go fuck ourselves. I reminded her that and she laughed.

I moved in two months ago and at the beginning we decided we would each clean major surfaces once about every two weeks in rotation.

For the record, I live with one other person whom I don’t know and since we have very different schedules we hardly ever see each other. We have a shared kitchen and bathroom but no shared living room/living spaces.

Now he has a lot of, just, stuff standing around the kitchen and bathroom and every time I see the kitchen there’s items piled in the sink and on the major surfaces/tables in the kitchen. Nothing disgusting, just the washing up and like boxes and old mason jars and stuff like that.

I don’t really use the kitchen as we get great meals at our university cafeteria that are frankly cheaper than anything i could cook for myself at home. And since the kitchen is majorly occupied by my roommate’s things, when I’ve cleaned the common spaces thus far I’ve only vacuumed the floor in the kitchen and vacuumed and wiped surfaces in the bathroom. I haven’t touched any surfaces in the kitchen, even the parts I could reach, since they only make up around one third of the surface in general and I would have to carefully wipe around his stuff. Eg today there were crumbs on the kitchen table that I could’ve wiped away, but tbh in the moment I just didn’t think of doing so, since his used plate was still next to them and I figured he’d put everything away in one go.

AITBR for not wiping surfaces in the kitchen? Do you think I should, as per our agreement? I haven’t felt too guilty so far since I haven’t used the kitchen a single time since moving in, and he hasn’t said anything either, but since it’s only been two months I’m worried he’s secretly fuming and only being polite for the moment.

Hey guys- I feel like im going insane a little here and need some advice/ reassurance.

I (24F) live in a small & old ×2 room house with my housemate(32F) who has lived here longer than me. The whole house has all of her belongings and things in it- there is no room for my stuff to be put in the shared space so I already feel slightly uncomfortable here. I feel as though this is her house and I'm living in it although I pay an equal amount of rent as her.

The house is old and there are no doors. The 'doors' are old sliding foldable doors. Which means there is not much privacy. The bathroom door is actually a door- however doesn't close properly and will swing open. Again- not much privacy. Sharing the space with another female I can deal with this although it's not ideal.

Already, I feel not the most comfortable in my own home here. Due to her being kind of possessive over things. Again like i said before it does not feel like my space at all.

Due to this I keep to my room majority of the time when I can.

Recently, she got a new bf (40M) (her ex actually) and I've noticed he is here more often than not in the last few months. They take up the whole lounge, kitchen, laundry while they are both here.

He seems nice but I don't feel comfortable with him here so often. Especially since the house is quite small and there Is not enough privacy.

I work alot and when I come home I want to relax, which I feel I can't- bc he is here.

I am couped up in my room to be honest.

And atm Due to these reasons I'm trying to move out.

I let my housemate know and 2 days later she said her boyfriend will be moving in in may this year. And prior to me telling her I was going to move out she asked me if I'm okay with the gas being disconnected to the house to save money which I found weird but me being me just Said sure bc I didn't want a confrontation. She said he will be staying here alot more often before he moves in though. - he doesn't pay rent. He doesn't pay bills. He's been here almost every day for the last 2 weeks now.

All of his stuff is in the house. I'm NOT moved out yet. I haven't even found a place.

I had to pull his underwear out of the dryer so I could use it.

He is basically living here without paying rent.

I feel as though this is crossing the line.

I only feel comfortable having a shower when he's not here but he's always here.

I have my ×2 pets in the studio outside and all of his stuff is in the studio so they can no longer free roam in the studio. All of his things are in the studio. And the shed. And the house.

I'm still looking for places to move to. Fingers crossed. But should I say something?

I feel as though this is so inconsiderate? Someone tell me if I'm wrong- am I being too dramatic about this?

They also currently have a dog in the house. Which she just sprung on me. She didn't ask me if it's okay.

• at times I come home and she's not here - only him.

She also has sent me multiple long msgs complaining about my pets before. Plus asking me to pay 40 cents more on rent bc she's trying to save and apparently I've been paying her 40 cents short this entire time (1 year and 6 months) and I'm just now hearing about it.

If the bills are higher than usual - bc he's here (more than I am honestly) should I say something?

I also don't think she will be telling the realestate that he's on the lease when he does move in.

Ultimately I'm moving out bc of how uncomfortable I am here with her plus him.

What would you guys do?

She treats me like a child.

So I (22 M) have had scant experience with roommates before. I lived six months with three guys and we are still great friends. We had some slight disagreements but we always worked things through. I had the expectation that that's kinda how it works. You live with someone on a daily basis, you befriend them eventually and when life parts ways you wish them well.

I was living alone for a while and I didn't like it one bit. Then all of a sudden I was approached by a friend of a friend (24 M). I did a tiny amount of background check and said yes because he seemed cooperative enough. Dude does all the household chores, anything I ask. We have our fair share of work.

HOWEVER. He's not friendly at all. Doesn't wanna talk, doesn't wanna get to know each other. Doesn't like my music. Inhales my food tho, a hole. He's gaslit me multiple times about personal commitments but then he's always avoided them last minute. Always put the blame on me that I'm too emotional like a girl and that I should curb my emotions. Gurl, you said some things that's why I had expectations in the first place.

For example, on my birthday morning he said, "You don't have to walk on egg shells, ask me whatever I'll do it for you."

So I said, can we go to a certain place, knowing that he easily frequents that place and it's no big deal for him. I'm trying to make it easy. It's afternoon now, and he said, ABSOLUTELY NOT. And I said, but you said you would?

And he said, gurl you're hallucinating ion never said nothing like that. I'm at my wits end. He has a horrid nymphomaniac girlfriend, I hate her down to the core of my being.

I just know that when our lease is over I'm gonna cause their breakup. I have some lethal information. Emotional damage for emotional damage. Am I an a hole?

so i moved into an apartment abt 3 months ago with my girlfriend and my brother in ohio and we all mutually created boundaries living with each other. and since living here my brother has been a nightmare to live with. i’ve given him multiple chances to abide by me and my girlfriends boundaries and he hasn’t so i told him abt 3 weeks ago he needs to leave my march 1st and he told me he’s not leaving until he sees an eviction notice. i’ve tried going around that bc it’s an annoying process from what i’ve seen and i don’t even know how to do it. he’s not my lease because he never paid his application and my landlord has said he needs my permission even if he tries paying for it. which obviously id say no. my landlord also told me that all she can do is give us 30 days for him to be on the lease or him move out or she can file to evict all of us, she won’t do that because she knows we want to live here. but as far as it stands i dont know wether i should just go through with the eviction process or if there’s something easier i can do. i gave him a written notice over text abt 3 weeks ago. any advice is appreciated!

I have a roomate who is awful. She leaves her messes out to the point where food rots, leaves her dishes out for weeks, has speaker phone conversations late at night, and has left her giant ass TV in the common area for weeks. I’ve tried talking to her, but she doesn’t listen and I’m just tired at this point. I have the option to move to a different house in the apartment unit, but since it’s college housing I’m worried I’ll get a worse situation than I’m currently in. It’s also a $350.00 fee to move to another location. I’m thinking I should do it even if I get into a worse situation. But I’m nervous about it, what should I do?

I found a roommate on fb Marketplace after moving to a new city. I'm not on the official apartment lease, but we signed a sublet agreement requiring 60 days' notice before moving out.

I want to end the sublease and move out bc my roommate and I have lived together for almost 4 months now, and in the past month and a half I have had 2 additional roommates who are her friends who sleep on the couch and occupy the common space. I talked to my roommate stating that this is unfair to me and not what I expected when I signed a 2bd lease with her and she responded by saying if I have an issue I can vacate in 60 days. Do I have to abide by this 60 day notice period? I also paid a security deposit of $675 to move in. Is the sublease legally binding, if she has been having guests stay for months at a time in the common area? Her guest recently built a clothing rack to put in the living room so that she can live there easier and not out of a suitcase and that was my final straw.

I am not registered as a sublease under the apartment building she stays at and am also not listed on the actual lease. I do not want to be in legal trouble for just moving out this month instead of staying here and dealing with 3 roommates (4 with me included) in a 2bdrm space.

I was thinking to call the apartment to ask about their subleasing policy to see if I am even legally staying here since I pay her on venmo currently, but not sure if it would change anything. Any advice is welcome!!

It’s gotten so bad that I now only go home to sleep. Before I’d be in my room using my laptop, & they would stand in my doorway & talk for a whole hour. Or I’d just want to sit in my room & watch Youtube or the free antenna channels, & can’t even enjoy that because I’d always get interrupted. Want to microwave a meal, here they come to the kitchen to bug me to death. Now I quit eating at home, & on my days off I just walk trails in the nature preserves, eat breakfast at mom & pop places & sit there for hours, & go to Regal & use my unlimited movie pass.

I live in an apartment style dorm(2 bedrooms with 2 students each, small common space with kitchen, 1 bathroom). The roomate in question is the one I'm currently sharing the bedroom with. I'll call her Ariana.

Since we began living together in last year August I noticed that Ariana is cronically depressed and has extreme mood swings. She was either talking loudly on her phone or bed rotting, slept during the daylight and was up between afternoon to dawn.

Last week I just couldn't sleep one night and was up until 4am. I was lying in my bed and Ariana was on an another one of her phone calls. Ariana speaks Jamaican patois and although I couldn't really understand the conversation, I had a feeling that she wasn't actually talking with someone. I opened my eyes halfway to see if she had any earphones, and sure enough she didn't have any. She was just talking to herself the whole night.

After that night I noticed that Ariana actually talks to herself a lot. What I assumed was a phone call often turned out to be her just muttering to herself. Sometimes she is loudly singing, dancing, and yelling in patois in the bedroom(I wouldn't go in the room at these moments). All this time I thought those were all some enthusiastic phone calls, now I'm not sure what that was.

I try to avoid Ariana at all costs but recently she had been using the bedroom to take online exams. She wouldn't tell me beforehand and just message me something like "hey I have an exam from 4pm I'll unlock the door at 6pm" - at 3:58. Since I keep all my stuff including the fridge in the bedroom, I told her twice to get one of the testing spaces on campus. She would say ok, but would answer in some sort of murmur without even looking at me, and proceed to do the same thing all over again.

I considered asking the RA for help but I'm not exactly sure where to start. And even if I do, I don't think there is anything the RA can do to actively help me since this doesn't involve drugs or any sort of big incident. I still got a semester left in this room with Ariana. Any advice would help, please share me your wisdom.

So, 2y ago I couldn’t find apartment with reasonable price so i found a roomate on facebook, at first she was fine like everyone is at the begging…

Since she finished university and has a job and i’m studying i started cooking for us whenever i have time, and she offered to pay for her half as she should but since it was just a few bucks i told her nothing for now when it adds up then, but she never offered again so i simply stopped paying double and started ordering doordash every day- automatically means that i don’t use fridge and sink.. kitchen at all

Then i started noticing whenever she buys or cleans something, which is barely ever and poorly done, she makes a big announcement, and on the other side i never mention what i bought or cleaned.

Then whenever i’m going somewhere she asks me to buy something for house or her just so she can never pay me back, even tho i explained to her many times that im driving and not planning to change my route when shes walking past a grocery store everyday.

She is extremely dirty, my stuff can be unorganized but never dirty, and since i study extremely hard university and have no time for anything, plus im dealing with anxiety and depression and i dont have time for cleaning all the time, but when i finally find time she acts like she is suprised which annoys me so much, cuz if you wanted it clean you would clean it?? ( when she finishes her work she lays watching tik toks and simply does nothing)

Kitchen is always dirty and she doesnt clean spoiled food, i tried to organize and clean everything many times but everytime the same, even when my dad came to visit me he said that its awfuly dirty and since he knows me very well he knows that thats not my kind of a mess.

I tried to talk to her once but she just startet yelling, and then i tried to explain to her that yelling at me clearly proves my point and that she is emotionally immature, so every conversation wpuld be the same.

She grow up much poorer than me and you can tell that by her behavior, and she acts like im mean cuz im having fun with my friends but never include her, but she doesn’t know how to behave, she is tooo loud, speaks openly about sex which i hate, acts like a gold digger… Im just embarrassed everytime she is around my friends.

She walks just in her underwear no bra around, which i am disgusted of.

When i come home i find her laying in my bed.. EW

Her walking, eating, breathing, exsting simply annoys me. I ignore her at all i dont even look at her dont speak to her and i can tell that she is mad cuz of that.

I am away during the summer and when i come back i find apartment dirsty, condoms, lubricants, you name it on the shelves. I am raised that what happens in your bedroom is just for you, no one else needs to hear or see that it’s disgusting.

I cannot kick her out cuz we are equal to the landlord and in general we have the same roght for the apartment, i dont want to move, and i cant cuz market went up so bad. I can just pray that she is going to move out and i will be able to find someone new idk I cant really speak up, especially now when its exam period and i dont have time to do anything so i cannot blame her, so im thinking when this is over that i should clean everything and complain to every little thing like she does..

Ok so to give a little understanding to my situation. There is myself (42m) and my girlfriend and we moved into a house with a friend of both of ours (43f) and her boyfriend (44m). Her mother owns the house and let's her stay there for free. Also we pay $750 a month for rent to my friend and her mother let's her keep that money. That is pretty much her only income, well that and the money that she begs her mom for throughout the month. Neither her or her boyfriend are employed or have any type of hustle to bring money in. My girlfriend and I buy and sell sports cards and memorabilia on my end and my girlfriend buys storage units/ pallets and resells on ebay. We are middle class but enjoy our lives as we get to travel alot and be our own bosses. We work hard for our money Because of what we do we have a bunch of packages coming and going all of the time. About a month ago within the span of a week I had four items that I did not recieve but all of the tracking numbers said they were delivered. My friend gets the mail I would say 90 percent of the time so I asked her. She said that she thought she had given me all of my mail but said she would look around. She said she looked everywhere but didn't find anything. Luckily they were all on the cheaper end and only totaled to around $60.She also said that moving forward she was going to do a better job with the mail so I took it as a loss and just dropped it. Fast forward to the other day and I was supposed to get two packages that day and noticed that I had gotten two more two days ago. I asked and she went into her room and grabbed the two packages that had been delivered that day. I asked about the two packages that were delivered two days ago. She told me she didn't get the mail that day and was positive that my girlfriend did and said she doesent understand why I'm accusing her of stealing. I told her I never accused her of stealing and that if anything she probably misplaced them and that my girlfriend didn't get the mail that day and everything she had said about what happened that day was not true. She said she would look around to see if she could find my envelopes. Two days have passed and she has been hiding out in her room 24/7, hasn't said a word to either of us and hasn't come out of her room once. One package has a card I paid $209 for that I have resold for $450 and another has a card I paid $45 for and should be able to sell for $60-70. Needless to say I'm not just forgetting about these packages. I just need advice on how to go about it. What I have been thinking is the total for all of the 6 packages added up I am going to take out of rent. I just can't decide if I should value the one card at the $209 I bought it for or $450 which I have it resold for if I can get my hands on it. Should I do all 6 packages for the total or just the latest two? I am pretty cool with her mom, should i let her know and let her make the decision? Oh yeah because I know I will be asked. I don't believe this is a post office problem because everyone else gets mail with no problems at all including her who gets a ton of mail because she is always ordering stuff online.. So this has only been the 6 packages that I have had missing and no others. I wish i knew what to do and i dont want things to be any more uncomfortable than they are now but i am lost on what path i should take. Thank you for your time! Any advice would be greatly appreciated!

Hello everyone, I (21f) am in uni and moved in with 3 of my friends last semester. It started off great, I loved being able to go to our kitchen and talk with everyone often. However, an issue has started to build up and it’s only gotten worse. My roommates have people over ALL THE TIME. I live in the room closest to the kitchen and living rooms, but the other rooms aren’t far. One of our closest friends is a commuter, so he comes to chill at our apartment almost EVERYDAY. From mon-fri i’ll say he’s over about 3 days a week. But whenever he comes over, everyone goes out into the kitchen to talk, and he’ll often bring activities like things to cook or do. I can NEVER nap when he’s there.I work nights and have earlier classes, so napping Is essential.

It’s not just this guy though, often theres large gatherings at night (ON WEEKDAYS) where about 3-5 people are over till late at night. If it gets too late they sleep over, my roommates have actually bought an AIR MATTRESS because people are sleeping over so much in our living room. Often during these hangouts, I plead multiple times in the group chat for them to quiet down, even going out in the living room desperately “I have class tomorrow, im tired please.” “Its quiet hours.” Nope. Screaming. They don’t even try. Last time, a few days ago, I seriously almost called our RA to submit a noise complaint.

To make it worse, two of my roommates work very early in the morning. So when people sleep over, they have “morning coffee” where they all talk loudly at about 7-8 am. And it wakes me up every time. They are just chatting, and laughing, but not even trying to be quiet.

Tonight (A THURSDAY!!) they’re having a party (Didn’t even ask me before sending out the groupchat text). I have a long drive tomorrow to another city. So I texted our group chat to please compromise. We can have the party tonight if theres no morning coffee or morning event Instead of responding with something like: “oh for sure, we’ll try to be quiet”I got answers like: “Well, I have work at (), I can’t just not go.” “Well, when we wake up everyone is going to wake up anyways.” “I have to say good morningggg to everyone~ it’ll just happen” wtaf?

Seriously what do I do?! I can never just have quiet in my own house anymore. I leave all day and keep myself busy to just not go home because one of my roommates has started getting petty towards me. It’s almost guaranteed theres going to be someone over at night, keeping me up. then my two roommates will wake me up going to work in the morning by loudly talking. but I feel like I can say nothing because 1. Every time they dismiss/ignore me. 2. The people coming over are also my friends, but I dont always feel like hanging out. 3. I dont want bad blood. Theres only 4 months of living together left. But im miserable and hate coming home and it’s really building resentment against some of my roommates. Only one of them listens to me and tries to be compassionate

So I'm a uni student and i just finished my second semester and live in a hostel as soon as I entered the room I didn't know anyone of the girls but I only have a problem with one. She argued woth me almost about everything and the fact that she have toxic thought (ex: she justify why man cheat) she also tells things I didn't say (basically lies about alot of things) last time she went to the hospital with me and she saw how much I weight so the next day she text my mom saying that I don't eat I swear I felt really uncomfortable and she didn't stopped there, I was studying cuz in the next day I have final exam I entered the room and she ask me to buy water for the room it was 9pm in the night and I still have to study so she call me selfish in my face then after minutes she ask me to go to the store with her when I said no (I rarely say no to her but I was studying for my finals) so she said that "life teaches you that even if you sacrifice for others no one will sacrifice for you" all this happens on less than 6h I tried to forgot about her attitude and how she treated me but I couldn't I texted her with the help of friends,only mentioned texting my mom but woow this girl turned the table and started saying things like I talked without thinking and hurt her while she the one that do that and also she mentioned that I had an attitude in from of our friend and that she apologize on my behalf but when I asked that friend she said that I acted cute and nice and nothing from what she said was true as I said she always lies she did hurt me alot and I didn't say anything when she do that I said that she forgot because she take strong pills for an issue in her brain and one of the side effects is memory lost so Am I overreacting

as you can tell by the title i’m (22f) in a tedious situation. my roommate’s boyfriend (23m) stays in our apartment basically every single night, including when she’s not there. we’ve brought this up with her (22f) directly and her parents (she’s still in school, so they pay for her rent in full) who stated when we signed the lease he was only allowed to stay over 3 nights a week, however, they aren’t enforcing the agreement. we’ve also contacted the leasing office and they told us that we’d all be evicted if he wasn’t added onto the lease. due to the nature of my roommate and her boyfriend, i know they’ll both refuse to pay for his portion. additionally, he basically doesn’t work so there’s no way he’d be able to afford it. i’m just confused on how to move forward with this situation. our lease ends soon(may), but i don’t want the remainder of my time to be spent paying for my terrible roommates freeloading boyfriend. does anyone have any advice?